Beside The Brook

By: Paulette Rae

ISBN - 978-1-877546-01-3

All rights reserved

Copyright © Aug. 2009, Paulette Rae

Cover Art Copyright © Aug. 2009, Brightling Spur

Bluewood Publishing Ltd

Christchurch, 8441, New Zealand

www.bluewoodpublishing.com

Names, characters and incidents depicted in this book are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental and beyond the intent of the author or the publisher.

No part of this e-book may be reproduced or shared by any electronic or mechanical means, including but not limited to printing, file sharing, and email, without prior written permission from Bluewood Publishing Ltd

Dedication

I would like to dedicate this book to a somewhere rather than a someone ... The Kenepuru Sounds will forever have a special place in my heart and without it this story would never have been born. Frampton Grange, the house where the story takes place, while exaggerated for the story, was inspired by a beautiful home I always admired when I was young. Surrounded by beautiful native New Zealand bush with views of the green hills and water, which are sometimes unbelievable, the Sounds is a little slice of heaven I keep with me always. Never take these gifts for granted.

Chapter 1

Another tunnel plunged the train into darkness. The steady rhythm of the steel wheels against the tracks echoed back from the concrete walls as Kirsten momentarily caught her own reflection in the window. This was most off putting. One minute she was gazing at the raging ocean of the South Island's East Coast and the next minute all she could see was her face, complete with an unruly mop of flaming hair, staring back at her.

She sighed and looked around at the other passengers. It had been four hours now, surely they must be near their destination. However she suspected it would be at least another hour before the train stopped in Blenheim, for they had to travel inland before they got there.

Kirsten unfolded the letter she had tucked into the back pocket of her jeans and read the words again. The creases in the page were dangerously close to ripping from being taken out so many times. Everything had happened so fast that she had to keep looking at the letter to remind herself it wasn’t a dream.

Dear Kirsten,

I have much pleasure in announcing that you have been chosen for the position of Nanny with our household.

Needless to say Sarah is excited to meet you. We hope you will be able to join us in no longer than two weeks. This, we feel sure, will give you time to get acquainted with our family before Sarah resumes her lessons.

As I previously explained, when we met in person last week, the room we have for you is fully furnished, but please feel free to bring your own comforts. The days of work as I have also explained will be Monday to Friday, but I hope you will be flexible with these to fit in with our busy lifestyles here.

I have enclosed enough funds for you to get as far as Blenheim on the train (the bus is so uncomfortable) and I will meet you personally once you confirm your date of arrival. If you have any questions then please feel free to contact me directly. Kindest Regards,

Elizabeth Ainsley-Frampton

Kirsten curled the letter back into her pocket as the train whipped from the end of the tunnel, into daylight once more.

She had applied for the job online about a month ago. Not long afterwards she had received a call from a very well spoken woman who called herself Beth. She wanted to come straight away and interview Kirsten. The application had been made on a whim. Kirsten was desperate to forget a bad experience with a past employer, so the opportunity to flee to the other end of the Island was very inviting. Now she wasn’t so sure. She was also leaving behind fabulous parents and two younger sisters to go and live in a house full of strangers. She had not met Sarah, the little girl she was supposed to be caring for. For all Kirsten knew she could be the demon brat from hell. From what Mrs. Ainsley-Frampton said, Sarah’s mother had died when she was very young. What type of issues did a child bear, having lost her mother at such a tender age?

Kirsten puzzled over the we that Mrs. Ainsley-Frampton referred to. In the interview she had mentioned other family members only briefly, Sarah’s father Jamie and Beth’s own son, Tyler.

Kirsten had also picked up that Beth was originally from England and had moved to the United States to marry a rich Texan. How she ended up single in New Zealand with two children Kirsten did not know, neither was it her business, but the history of the eclectic family members intrigued her to no end. If nothing else the job would be interesting; a challenge she was looking forward to.

Nevertheless a storm of butterflies rose in her stomach as the train propelled itself closer to her destination.

A small boy in the seat behind her, who had been quiet for most of the trip, but was now obviously bored, poked his smiling face around Kirsten’s seat. His little fingers on one hand gripped the edge of the foam seat from behind. Brown vegemite smears dotted his cheeks, while his other hand clasped the crusty remains of a sandwich. Kirsten smiled back at him. “Hi.”

“Hello,” he whispered.

“Are you having fun on the train?”

He nodded his cherub head. Soft brown curls bobbed over his baby blue eyes. “Yep.”

Kirsten twisted in her seat so she could get a better look at him. “You’ve been a good boy.”

He smiled and seemed pleased she had noticed his manners. “Yep. We get there soon?” He screwed his nose up in comic frustration as he slid forward to get closer to Kirsten.

“Pretty soon.” Kirsten smiled. “Are you bored?”

The boy nodded his head and pouted. “Mummy’s sleepy.” He pointed a tiny digit in his mother’s direction. Kirsty turned and looked back over the seat. A pretty woman about the same age as Kirsten, her head bent back and eyes close, sat slumped into the corner of the seat. Her arm was curved protectively around her pregnant belly. Kirsten held one straight finger over her lips. “Shhh. Do you have a book to read?”

“Uh-huh.” The toddler held up a wire bound book with brightly coloured pages. Kirsten beckoned for him to sit on her lap. “Come on, mum won’t mind. I’ll read it to you.”

Delighted, the little boy took the book with both hands and clambered onto the seat next to Kirsty.

As she opened the cover of the book smells of sweet no tears shampoo mixed with baby powder and left over yeasty vegemite spread wafted over her. The infant was a pleasant distraction from her otherwise uneventful trip. She never tired of watching the ocean as it pounded down on the sand, white foam beating layers from the rocks around the coast, but there was only so much you could see in four hours.

The young boy’s name was Toby, and he sat with Kirsty for the next hour while his mother slumbered behind them. Three books later, and after a one sided conversation about the seals on the rocks down below as the train softly continued it’s rhythmic strum on the endless tracks, his mother woke. The train blew its whistle as they crossed a large rail bridge. Toby wriggled with joy against Kirsten’s legs as he peered down through the window. His breath created little circles of steam on the glass, which he promptly smeared into tracks with one finger.

“There you are Toby.” His mother appeared from behind them, looking very tired, and Kirsten smiled at the heavily pregnant woman. “I told you to sit quietly and not bother anyone while mummy had a sleep.”

“Oh, he’s no bother.” Kirsten held the boys arm as he scrambled down from the seat and joined his mother once more. “We were reading books weren’t we Toby? It’s my fault. You looked like you could do with a rest and we were both so bored.”

Toby nodded and took his pile of books from Kirsten. “Yep.” He looked back at his mother. “We nearly there yet Mum?”

“Yes sweetie, we’re nearly there. We’ve just left Seddon now, so I guess it’s another twenty minutes.” She smiled at Kirsten. She had pale skin and full lips painted with pink gloss. “Thank you so much for entertaining the rat bag here. I hope he wasn’t too much of a pain.”

“Not at all. He’s a perfectly pleasant wee man.” She looked down at Toby, who quietly sucked his thumb now he had his mother’s leg in his grasp. She held out her hand. “It was nice to meet you Toby. You look after your mummy, won’t you?”

The child seemed happy to be treated with a gesture that only adults exchanged and he grinned. He offered his clammy hand to Kirsten and she shook it gently.

“My mummy’s having a baby.” Toby lifted his hand and patted the protuberance in mention.

“I know.” Kirsten let her eyes widen for effect. “Does that mean you’re going to have a brother or a sister?”

Toby frowned, obviously unnerved at the prospect of a baby. “No,” he shook his head,

“it’s a puppy.”

The two women laughed as they exchanged glances.

“Toby, remember we talked about this?”

The little boy nodded somberly, as if his heart was set on having a dog instead of a tiny sibling.

Kirsten opened her mouth into a big o and put her hand over it in imagined awe.

“Baby sisters and brothers are so great. I have two baby sisters. You’re going to have so much fun.”

The boy seemed to brighten a little and glanced at his mother for reassurance. She nodded and smiled in confirmation.

“Okay.” He hid his face against his mother’s legs and yawned.

“I’m Jennifer by the way.” She held out her hand for Kirsten to take.

“Kirsty, it’s nice to meet you.”

“You’re wonderful with kids. Do you have any of your own?”

Kirsten shook her head and smiled. “I’m a nanny.”

“Oh how interesting.” Jennifer smiled. “Well, you’re certainly in the right profession. This one seems quite taken.” She stroked the fine hair on Toby’s head. The little boy responded by humming a familiar nursery rhyme from one of his books.

“Well it was just as much fun for me. I was getting a little tired of the trip myself.”

Jennifer and Toby returned to their seats and Kirsten gathered her thoughts together. She had about ten minutes to herself before she deposited herself into the hands of a woman she had met only briefly. Was she really doing the right thing? She could have stayed in Christchurch; could have easily gotten another job. There were plenty of vacancies in the area, why the hell was she traveling five hundred kilometres away?

She was pretty sure her parents had not wanted her to take the job. They hadn’t said as much; she was twenty-three and quite capable of making her own decisions, so they had

let her do just that. She had never lived away from her home town before, especially in some backdrop remote part of the country she had not even visited. However she had heard the Marlborough Sounds was beautiful and now that she was actually on her way she couldn’t wait to find out.

Jennifer had said she was good with children. She just had to focus on that right now. For she was about to be put in charge of a seven year old girl she had never met. Not only was she the Nanny, she was also responsible for the correspondence schooling of this little girl. Obviously Mrs. Ainsley-Frampton thought she could do it. Why else would she have chosen Kirsten over all the other applicants? If nothing else it was a challenge. And that was just what Kirsten was looking for right now. Something to keep her so busy she didn’t have to think about what she had left behind.

* * * *

Kirsten saw her new employer on the platform as the train pulled into the Blenheim station. Beth was not easy to miss. Kirsten guessed she was in her late fifties, possibly even early sixties if she looked better than her age indicated. Her short salt and pepper hair was immaculate, parted on one side at the front and swept back into a duck’s tail. She wore a large black hat, dark sunglasses, a neatly pressed beige suit jacket and matching skirt. Her blood red lipstick glistened in the bright sunlight. Looking at her, Kirsten immediately thought of the old adage of an English Rose. She had a wonderful complexion; Kirsten guessed she would have been stunning in her youth.

“Hello my dear,” Elizabeth beamed as Kirsten approached.

“Hello Mrs. Ainsley-Frampton.” Kirsten smiled as she pushed her wayward hair from her face. The day had started early and her attire had been the least of her worries. She had wanted to be comfortable for the trip, so she had worn a pair of black skinny jeans and a loose fitting t-shirt. Standing next to Elizabeth she suddenly felt very underdressed. She looked down at her white sneakers. As if sensing her discomfort the older woman smiled.

“You’ll have to excuse me Kirsten dear, I’ve been to a meeting. I don’t usually dress up like this to meet people from the train. And please, call me Beth, everybody does.”

“Well then please call me Kirsty.” The chill of an awkward greeting melted away as Kirsten smiled. “Did Sarah come with you?” She glanced around, hoping to catch a first glimpse of her new ward.

“No, no, she’s at home. She did want to come but I had this business to attend to first. She tends to get a little car sick on the drive here too, so I thought it best she stayed home.” Beth smiled and waved her hand toward the train. A basin of smells wafted around her; strong sweet perfume, hairspray and cosmetics.

“Do you have much luggage, honey?” Her voice was a strange mixture of Londoner and American drawl, with a hint of the kiwi accent showing signs of the duration she had lived in New Zealand.

“No, not a lot.” Kirsten was used to being a nomad, moving from one job to the next, so traveling lightly was a prerequisite. She had only recently moved home from her last position, so things had not begun to accumulate again. The older woman looked pleased. “Oh, I’m so glad. I was going to bring Craig with me just in case you had a lot of heavy boxes, but in the end I had to leave him with Sarah.” She scowled. “My sons have both placed so much importance on Sarah’s well being that they have deserted her this week.”

Kirsten wasn’t sure what to say. Beth’s tone was disapproving, her facial expression and the way her mouth was drawn in a reflection of her feelings. But as she looked back at Kirsten her mouth curled into a smile and she reached up to take off her dark glasses. Her eyes were a beautiful deep blue, almost turquoise in the afternoon light.

“Do forgive me, honey.” She touched Kirsten’s arm. Her nails were neatly shaped and painted. “I do ramble on sometimes. You’ll find my expectations of the people around me are quite high, so don’t be offended. I’m always disappointed. I’m from England so everything has to be proper and I married a Texan so everything has to be over the top. There’s no winning with me.”

Kirsten laughed. She liked this woman already.

As the afternoon progressed she also learned Beth was correct. She certainly did ramble on. They talked about Sarah as they sat for coffee and a bite to eat before their two hour drive. When they reached the country road, Kirsten understood why Sarah suffered from car sickness. The road didn’t just wind, it lunged and rolled, weaving its way through the hills. After an hour the tar seal changed to thick gravel over a clay single lane. Judder bars from trucks which traveled in the wet, leaving their tyre marks permanently in the clay surface, often slowed their progress. Kirsten had never been car sick before, but her stomach lurched as the road continued its endless path.

Thankfully Beth stopped at the side of the road for a rest and Kirsten scrambled down from the little four wheel drive. The hillside where they stopped was covered in native bush and birds were busy in the trees. The air was so still that Kirsten was awed by the sight. To the left of them the road dropped away, continuing the slope of the hillside to the beach below. It was such a contrast to the ocean she was used to. This was no surf beach however. The water lay still like glass, reflecting the hills as a mirror would. Beth came to stand beside her. Again sensing her discomfort she said, “Don’t worry, we’re nearly there. Take a big gulp of that fresh air and you’ll be okay in a few minutes.” She pointed down the bay, where miles of bush and untouched land lay before them. A few houses dotted the hillside. “See that jetty out on the point?”

Kirsten shaded her eyes and could see a boat tied at its mooring where Beth had indicated. “Yes, I see it.”

“That’s our place.”

“Oh, good.” Kirsten smiled, relieved their trip was nearly over; at least until the next time she needed to go into town.

“You can’t see the house but it’s down there. I hope you’ll like it. We have tennis courts and a swimming pool. Sarah loves the water but she’s not a very confident swimmer yet.”

“It sounds lovely.”

Even after Beth’s description of the house, Kirsten was pleasantly surprised when they pulled into the driveway. The long sloped entrance to the property wound through Manuka and Beech trees for about five hundred metres. Mossy undergrowth and green ferns covered most of the untouched hillside. When they emerged back into the sun the ground spread out into lush lawns, expertly manicured into thick rows of alternating shades of green. The house stood back against the hillside with three stories of windows towering in white palatial elegance. Kirsten imagined a mansion like this would seem out of place in such a natural setting, but it had obviously been built with care and consideration to the environment it occupied. The lawn ran down the hillside below the house, to another flat area, where the pool was dug into the ground, surrounded by

natural stone tiles. The pool house beyond this was a tiny miniature of the house above, painted white with pale blue window frames.

As Kirsten stepped from the car her feet crunched on the pebbled path. Tiny brown and white polished stones led the way to the patio, where wooden framed French doors stood open to the summer breeze.

“Welcome to Frampton Grange.” Beth grinned as she walked with Kirsten up the steps. “We’ll get your bags later. Come and meet Sarah first.”

Right on cue the little girl appeared through the door, running at full speed toward them.

“Gran,” she exclaimed in excitement, “you’re back.”

She jumped into the woman’s arms, looped her limbs around her as if she had been absent for much longer than just the day.

Beth smiled and hoisted Sarah onto her waist. The girl cast a shy smile at Kirsten as she approached and rested her head onto her grandmother’s shoulder for reassurance.

“Sarah, this is Kirsten.”

“Hi.” Her tiny voice was barely audible.

“Hi, Sarah. I’m so pleased to meet you. Your grandmother has told me all about you.”

Kirsten smiled and reached out to shake hands.

Sarah seemed so small for her age, her arms and legs surprisingly thin. Beth encouraged her to hold out her hand to be introduced and she did so reluctantly.

“Pleased to meet you,” Sarah said as if the words had been rehearsed. She looked as if she were worried Kirsten was going to eat her.

“Wow, you’re very polite.” Kirsten smiled.

“Shall we show Kirsten around the house?” Beth set Sarah back on her feet and took her by the hand.

“Ah-huh.” The little girl nodded. Her long blonde hair had been pulled back into a ponytail and fixed with a red ribbon, tiny wisps escaped from either side to frame her pretty face. She looked at Kirsten with wide soft brown eyes, curiosity slowly stealing her timidity as they entered the house. They walked into a large kitchen. The dining area had a perfect view of the front yard and sun streamed through the picture windows onto the varnished chipboard floor. A massive double door fridge and freezer, complete with ice maker stood next to a small breakfast bar which separated the kitchen into a practical work area. A custom made chopping block with a checkered top stood in the middle of the floor. Around the ceiling a brass railing had been attached to hold an array of pots and pans. It was definitely a working kitchen, spacious and clean. The benches held an appliance for every occasion. Frying pans, blenders, juicers, waffle irons, any food you could imagine could be produced in this one place. A tall man with thinning sand coloured hair stood next to the sink. The sleeves of his white kitchen jacket were folded above his elbows.

“Kirsty, this is Craig. He’s our most gracious cook and also our caretaker. If you need to know anything Craig is the man to ask.”

“Hello, Craig.”

“Very pleased to meet you, Kirsty.” He wiped his big hands on a tea towel and stepped forward to shake hands. Kirsten guessed he was about the same age as the lady of the house.

They left Craig to prepare the evening meal and continued their way out into a wide corridor at the back of the house. It seemed more like a room than a hallway to Kirsty.

Cupboards with wooden paneled doors lined the walls, the end compartment housing a service elevator to the upper levels.

Beth explained, “This house was planned for a woman in a wheelchair. Hence the reason for everything being so spacious.”

At the end of the corridor a wide staircase wound upwards to the right until it reached the second floor, dark hand varnished railings a gorgeous contrast to the cream plush carpets. Books lined the built in shelves all the way up as they climbed. The smell of old musty pages filled Kirsten’s nostrils as she scoped the titles. There were old hardback copies of The Lord of the Rings, volumes of encyclopedias from different countries, a whole series of National Geographic magazines, and classics such as Wuthering Heights and Moby Dick. Writers old and new could be found, Sarah’s influence showing with books from J.K. Rowling, Joy Cowley and Margaret Mahy. It was a rainy day paradise. Kirsten hoped she would be allowed to borrow from their extensive library.

The second floor housed most of the bedrooms, five in total, including a guest bedroom and rumpus room for Sarah. Elizabeth slept on this floor, as did Sarah and her father, Jamie. Tyler resided on the third floor, in the room adjacent to his office. The whole house seemed to be laid with the same carpet, the rooms warm, fresh and tastefully decorated. Kirsten’s room was at the North Eastern end of the house on the third floor. Facing the sea on one side she had a wonderful view of the bay below from a tiny balcony. The second row of windows caught the morning sun. The room had been freshly painted in a subtle shade of apricot. Set to one side was a small ensuite with a shower over the bath, a toilet and hand basin. The room next to hers was a tiny office which served as a classroom for Sarah. The young girl had never been to a conventional school, so everything she needed was here for home learning, including her own computer.

Climbing back down the stairs, they circled the other side of the first floor, finding the downstairs bathroom and toilet, the laundry, a small TV room, formal dining room and large lounge.

“We have a cleaner who comes twice a week, but mostly we all pitch in to keep the place tidy,” Beth instructed. They walked through the French doors to the patio. The blue water of the pool contrasted against the green backdrop of the ocean beyond. Sarah let go of her grandmother’s hand and crept closer to Kirsty for a better look. Kirsten had made a point of ignoring the child, to let her come out of her shell in her own good time. She found this always worked best with children who were a little shy. Sure enough, Sarah’s curiosity was getting the better of her. She was now right beside Kirsten, blinking her long lashes inquisitively at the strange woman with curly red hair. Craig emerged from the kitchen to help Kirsten with her bags, and they piled them into the lift to save carrying them two flights of stairs.

“It’s just the four of us for dinner,” Beth explained as they moved her things into her room. “We like to have a meal altogether if only once a day.” She smiled. “You’ll soon get used to the nuances of everyone around here.” She looked down at her granddaughter and smiled. “Dad’s away a lot, isn’t he?”

Sarah nodded, the two middle fingers of her right hand wedged firmly between her lips.

“Tyler travels a lot too. We have two restaurants in town and a salmon farm which keeps him pretty busy. So I like to keep the family together as much as possible.

Breakfast and lunch are whenever you feel like it. If Craig is around he will fix anything you want, but during the day he’s kept busy elsewhere so we look after ourselves.”

The middle aged man smiled fondly at Beth as he hauled the last of Kirsty’s belongings from the lift.

“With it being the school holidays at the moment things are a little off schedule, but during the week we try to encourage a bit of routine with Sarah.”

Kirsty nodded. “Yes, I understand that.”

“Anyway,” Beth smiled, “there’s plenty of time to talk about that. Why don’t we leave you alone to get unpacked?” She glanced at her watch. “What time is dinner Craig?”

Craig turned at the door. “Two hours. I’m running a little late tonight. Even though I had help in the kitchen today.” He smiled at Sarah.

Beth and Kirsty smiled in understanding as Craig winked.

“Please make yourself at home, Kirsty.” Beth smiled warmly. Craig nodded and walked from the room, back downstairs to attend to dinner.

“Thank you very much, Beth,” Kirsty replied.

Beth took Sarah’s hand and went to the door. “Well just hold on to that thank you. You might not be thanking me in a couple of weeks.”

Kirsty looked warily at her new employer, unsure of what to say. Thankfully Beth smiled. “Just kidding, dear, I’m sure you’re going to love it here.”

Sarah pulled on Beth’s hand and whispered, “Can I stay grammy?” She glanced back at Kirsty to see if she had heard the question.

“No, honey, you come with me. Kirsty has to get unpacked. You’ll have plenty of time to talk to her later.”

Kirsty smiled and watched them go. She could hear Sarah’s chirpy voice as they disappeared down the stairs, more lively now that she was out of earshot of the strange new occupant. Kirsty sat on the edge of the double bed, the cream crepe bedspread crinkled with stiffness beneath her. That would be the first thing to go. She unzipped her blue bag, pulled out a pale blue faux fur blanket and swapped it for the existing cover. She folded the unwanted duvet and deposited it into the cupboard above the wardrobe. The doors on the wardrobe were double mirrors, and she cast a glance at her reflection as she pulled them closed. Her hair was a shocking mess of curls, her freckled face pale and washed out. What she needed was a hot shower and a change of clothes before dinner. The unpacking could wait. She pushed the single door open to the balcony and a late afternoon breeze wafted into the room. She couldn’t believe how fresh the air smelled, it was like nothing she had experienced before. It was clean and pure, something you only noticed after being in a smoggy city for a long time. The view from her room was amazing; the hills that surrounded the bay were lush with the rich colours of native flora. And all around her was the sound of birds and cicadas, the muted noise of a boat whirring along in the water somewhere music to her ears. How could she be so lucky to just walk into a paradise like this?

Chapter 2

Kirsten wandered downstairs, feeling refreshed after her shower in a clean pair of cotton trousers and a white sleeveless blouse. Her hair was now washed and back under control, pulled back into a ponytail at the base of her neck. A few wavy strands framed her face. She took her time getting to the first floor. Now alone, she could take some time to study the house. The walls were lined with artwork; an eclectic mix of modern and classic works. Some of the paintings seemed more like something Sarah would do with a roller, but Kirsten felt sure the price tags would infer otherwise. Opposite the stairwell of the second storey hung a wonderful painting of a slender young woman, wearing only a carefully positioned sarong, the ends blowing away from her in the soft breeze. Her long dark hair blew across her face, completely obscuring one eye and half her mouth. What could be seen however, showed the woman to be beautiful beyond compare. Her glamorous stare meant for the artist now looked upon Kirsten with giant brown eyes. It was here that Kirsten saw the resemblance to Sarah and she wondered if this was her mother.

Again she paused on the first floor staircase to view the assortment of books that resided here in a strange collection. Books which had never been read, obviously put there for Sarah to enjoy, like Charlotte’s Web and Bow Down Shadrach. It was apparent by the Stephen King collection there was an enthusiast in the house, for there were several tatty volumes of his macabre tales. Further along, she found an array of Jackie Collins books, several Harold Robbins juicy tales and numerous classics such as Catcher in the Rye and Lady Chatterley’s Lover.

Kirsten wandered down to the first floor, finding herself confused for just a moment about which way to go. When they had originally gone up they had come through the kitchen, but on the way back they had reversed their direction. Deciding it didn’t matter she swerved to the left and found her way back to the spacious formal lounge. A large open fireplace, built into the wall between this room and the dining room, made Kirsten imagine it would be a wonderful place to sit and read in the winter. The room caught the afternoon sun through two rows of French doors which opened onto the patio. This was grey painted concrete with white dipped cast iron hand rails. Stairs flowed down onto the lawn, preceding a gradual drop of about thirty feet before the pool and guesthouse below framed the edge of the grounds. It was an architectural paradise; a beautiful home cut into the fine grandeur of the wilderness that surrounded it. Kirsty walked onto the patio, stood at the edge and peered down to the sea. The sun was low over the hills now and fine fingers of orange and yellow stretched out over the horizon. Shimmers of light caught the water which shivered softly against the beach and lapped the stony shore as it receded to low tide.

“Beautiful isn’t it?”

Kirsty was startled by Beth’s approach. She had been so lost in thought she didn’t hear the woman arrive.

“Oh, yes.” She smiled in appreciation. “I’ve never seen anything quite like it. It’s hard to believe people live here. It’s somewhere you’d expect to go on holiday.”

Beth laughed softly. “I know what you mean. When you’ve been here a little while you’ll start taking it for granted.”

Kirsten frowned. “I can’t imagine that.”

Beth surveyed Kirsten from head to toe. “Well, you look much fresher, dear, do you feel better now?”

“Yes, thank you.”

Beth had also changed, into a pastel pink tracksuit.

“Well, I always have a glass of wine before dinner. Would you join me?”

Kirsten smiled. She was warming to this lifestyle more with every minute that ticked by. “I’d like that, thank you.”

“Sarah’s in the kitchen with Craig so we can relax for a few minutes before dinner.”

They returned to the lounge and Beth poured white wine into two crystal glasses at the bar.

Kirsty sat in an overstuffed leather recliner next to an old polished grand piano.

“Who’s the piano player?” she asked curiously.

“Oh, we all have a bash.” Beth smiled. “I’m trying to teach Sarah, but she has her mother’s attention span. Tyler is almost as good as Sarah.” She winked. “Jamie is the one to watch out for. He doesn’t play often anymore but he certainly knows how to tickle the ivories.”

“Really?”

“Oh yes, Jamie’s the arty one around here.” She pointed to a photo of Sarah on the wall. “Sometimes I think that camera’s glued to his face.”

Kirsty stood up and walked over to the photo for a closer look. He had captured Sarah at a wonderful moment. She sat on a swing which had been erected beneath the branch of a huge beech tree. She was gazing out to sea, oblivious of anything but her own feet as they stuck out in front of her.

“Did he do the painting upstairs too?”

Beth laughed. “Which one?”

“Is it Sarah’s mother, on the second floor?”

“Oh yes,” Beth said delightedly, “that’s Brook.”

“He’s very good.” It made sense now. The look she had seen in Brook’s eyes could only be for the man she loved. What a beautiful notion. To be posing for a painting, the artist being the one and only person who saw her like that; with the look of love in her eyes. And Jamie who had portrayed it so perfectly onto canvas for the world to see forever. She felt sad for Jamie suddenly, even though they had never met, for he had lost a woman who obviously loved him so much.

“He should be home tomorrow night, you’ll meet him then. And Ty should be home later on this evening.” Beth glanced at her watch. “But that depends on what time his meeting finished. Knowing him, he’ll have to have dinner and socialize before he comes home.” She rolled her eyes for emphasis then smiled. “Let me just warn you about one thing.” She leaned closer to Kirsty so she could lower her tone. “Tyler and Jamie are like chalk and cheese, and they fight like cats and dogs. Don’t, for heaven’s sake, get in the middle of them.”

“Seriously?” Kirsten asked, wide-eyed.

“Oh, maybe that’s a little melodramatic.” Beth winked. “But they are not friends.”

“Doesn’t that make it hard for Sarah?”

“Yes and no. They tolerate each other when she’s around. Sometimes I think-,” she paused and her eyes glazed over. “No, I know. She’s the only thing holding this family together. Jamie knows it. He knows he has complete power over Ty and me. He could leave tomorrow, take Sarah to his parents place in Nelson and it would break both our hearts.”

The older woman glanced fearfully at Kirsten, her eyes pleading, as though she were looking for an answer.

“Is he away a lot?” Kristen felt as if she were invading their privacy by asking, but if she was to look after Sarah then they were things she probably needed to know.

“His work takes him away a lot, but sometimes I think he’s away more than he needs to be. It’s hard on Sarah. She’s so isolated here.”

Kirsten wondered why then, if Beth knew the situation was hard on Sarah, did she choose to live in such an isolated area. Surely it would be better for Sarah if they lived near other people; other children at least, with whom she could socialise. But it was not her place to ask. Not yet anyway.

As if hearing her name, Sarah appeared through the heavy swinging door from the kitchen. She grinned at Kirsten then addressed her grandmother.

“Craig said to say dinner is ready.”

“Oh, good.” With ring laden fingers, Beth straightened Sarah’s hair. “Will you please tell him we’ll eat in the kitchen tonight? We don’t want to be too formal on Kirsten’s first night do we?”

Sarah shook her head, smiled to reveal a comically wide gap where a tooth was missing from the front of her mouth.

They enjoyed what Beth called a simple meal together in the kitchen. To Kirsten it was a feast. Craig had prepared home baked bread rolls and a delicious chicken broth for starters. Afterward he served steak and seasoned homegrown vegetables. Finally he produced a huge cheesecake, the size of which Kirsten had never seen, drizzled with wild berry compote and garnished with whipped cream.

“Uncle Ty’s favourite.” Sarah squirmed with delight in her chair as a large bowlful of dessert appeared before her.

“I think there will be plenty left for Uncle Tyler to enjoy when he gets home later.”

Craig winked at Sarah as he sat down to his own generous helping. Kirsten wondered where they put all this glorious food; none of them were overweight. If this was a hint of what was to come, Kirsten could imagine herself ten stone heavier in just as many months.

Beth smiled as if she read her mind. “Don’t worry, honey, with all the fresh air and hill climbing around here you’ll be able to eat like a horse.”

“Don’t be silly Grammy, horses don’t eat cheesecake,” Sarah exclaimed with authority. Her brows creased together over her cocoa eyes. Beth and Kirsten looked at each other for a moment in silence before they erupted into laughter.

“You’re right Sarah, they don’t,” Kirsten confirmed, finally getting her amusement under control.

Looking pleased with the reaction, Sarah spooned a huge helping of berries and cream into her mouth. She had such an angelic face. The outline of her mouth was well defined and when she smiled her radiance lifted the room. She had long curled eyelashes and perfect round eyes the colour of milk chocolate as it melts. Her slender limbs were tanned from the hours she spent outdoors, fine golden hairs shone on her arms.

After they had finished eating Kirsten offered to help with the clean up, but Beth insisted it was not necessary. Instead she invited Kirsten to join her and Sarah on a walk

to the beach. Kirsten thought about the bags sitting upstairs for her to unpack and declined the offer.

“Maybe Sarah could take me to the beach tomorrow?” she suggested instead. The little girl’s face brightened. “Okay. Is that okay, Grammy?”

“That’s a wonderful idea.” Beth smiled.

“I’m not sure what plans you have tomorrow,” Kirsten added. “But I’d like to spend some time with Sarah if that’s okay. Probably the sooner we get to know each another the better.”

Beth looked pleased, as did Sarah. “That sounds great. What do you think, Sarah?

Will you show Kirsten around tomorrow?”

Sarah jiggled excitedly from one foot to the other. “Yes, I will!”

* * * *

Kirsten had a little trouble getting to sleep among her new surroundings. When she climbed the stairs to the third floor, feeling rather like a Princess retiring to her tower, she felt so isolated from the rest of the world. The familiar sounds of traffic outside the window were gone, as were the street lights to illuminate the room. There were no noises through the walls from a television, or people moving around the house in close proximity. The floorboards didn’t even creak as she crept around on the plush carpet. As her toes sank deep into the cashmere pile it felt more like she had been flown off for a vacation in a five star hotel rather than a house she was to reside in. Everything was so extravagant.

She turned the lights off to pitch black and deathly silence. She heard a couple of cars about a kilometre away. Around midnight she was vaguely aware of headlights creeping down the hill, glaring against the house below her. She heard the engine cut and a car door open and close, then feet crunched on the gravel path before everything fell to quiet once more. She guessed it must have been Tyler arriving home. Kirsten was apprehensive about meeting both Beth’s son and Sarah’s father. She had already formed pictures of them in her mind from what Beth had told her. She imagined Tyler to be a younger version of his mother, but she was unsure of Jamie. She couldn’t understand how a man could be away from his daughter so much. Sarah seemed to be a grounded, loving child. What kind of father would be so absent from his child’s life, especially when he was her only surviving parent?

* * * *

The bright morning sun penetrating the flimsy curtains woke Kirsten early. She felt like she had hardly slept at all. The bed sheets were twisted around her body like a sleeping bag and she was damp with sweat. She pulled back the curtain to catch a glimpse of the blue cloudless sky. It was another day in paradise; her first morning in her new home. She stretched and crawled from the confinement of the sheets, pushed them impatiently to the end of the bed. Then she showered and dressed in a pair of green cotton shorts and the sleeveless blouse she had worn to dinner the night before. Looking in the wardrobe she realised her choice of shoes were mostly inappropriate. She had a decent pair of sneakers and one pair of sandals sturdy enough to tackle the hills and walk to the beach. The three pairs of heels she had packed would more than likely sit in the back of the wardrobe for the duration of her tenure. Her plush pink

slippers would also be redundant, considering the whole house was furnished with gorgeous shag pile carpet and heaters were installed everywhere. Even the kitchen and bathrooms had heated floors.

She wandered down to the first floor. There was no sign of life on the second floor as she passed, but as she neared the kitchen she could hear two male voices. She pushed open the solid oak door, her rubber soles squealed on the glossy floor as she entered. Craig stood at the bench, preparing a fresh fruit salad. Poised atop the breakfast bar was Tyler, his bare tanned legs stretched out before him. Kirsten knew at once who he was, for the similarity to his sister’s image in the painting upstairs was uncanny. He had dark hair, cropped close to his head and brooding brown eyes. He seemed different to what Kirsten imagined he would be. From Beth’s description she had pictured a smart business man who wore a suit and tie. However the man before her was far from that. Tyler wore cut off shorts, something he had fashioned from an old pair of Levis, and a cotton Hawaiian print shirt. He had long lean arms and legs, his bony bare feet hung to the floor as he watched Kirsten approach.

“You must be Kirsten.” His voice was deep and mellow. He spoke with a slight American accent, which was only apparent when he reached the r in her name. He pushed himself from the counter and held out his hand for her to take.

“Yes, I am. And you must be Tyler.” She smiled as his warm fingers gripped hers. His dark complexion was a total contrast to her pale, freckled skin.

“Well, Beth’s a sly old dog isn’t she?” It seemed the question was directed at her; however Tyler looked at Craig and winked. “I thought you’d be old and ugly like the last one.”

Craig laughed and Kirsten blushed at Tyler’s strange compliment. Craig wiped his hands and looked at Kirsten. “Would you like some breakfast, Kirsten?”

“Please, call me Kirsty,” she smiled. “And yes, I’d love some breakfast please.”

“Well, on that note I’m going to go before Sarah gets down here, otherwise I’ll never get out to the boat.” Tyler smiled at Kirsten. “I look forward to talking to you later, Kirsty. I’m sure my mother has the day planned for you and Sarah already.”

Kirsten pulled a chair from under the table, sat down and wrapped her ankles around the turned legs.

“Actually I asked Beth if Sarah and I could spend the day together.”

Tyler looked impressed. “Well good on you. If you guys get bored I’m going out to the farm just after lunch. Sarah loves going on the boat, and I’d be happy to give you a tour of the Sound.”

Kirsten smiled. “That would be great.” She hadn’t spent much time boating before, but she loved the water. The thought of an afternoon at sea was enticing. Tyler seemed satisfied with her response. A small hint of a smile appeared at the corner of his mouth. “Okay. I’ll see you at the jetty after lunch. Sarah knows the way.”

“Thank you,” Kirsten beamed.

“No, thank you,” Tyler oozed. “It’s been a while since I had two beautiful women out on the boat.” He gave her a playful wink.

“Yeah, right,” Craig muttered sarcastically under his breath. Tyler thumped him lightly on the shoulder as he passed. “You, keep your hand off it old man.” He grinned as he left the kitchen.

Craig laughed and looked at Kirsten. “Don’t believe a word that comes out of that man’s mouth.”

Kirsten smiled. “Yes, well, I can tell he’s probably more than a little popular with the ladies.”

“Ah, you’ll soon find that out for yourself.”

“How long have you worked here?”

He walked to the table with two serving bowls and a large platter of fresh fruit.

“About five years now. I used to work in the next bay, there’s a hotel there called The Portage, have you heard of it?”

Kirsten shook her head.

“It’s a nice place, but then I met Beth and she poached me away to come here.”

“I guess you know the family well then.” Kirsten felt with Craig being detached it would be easier asking him some of the things she wanted to know. Craig glanced at her sideways as he took a large container of yoghurt from the fridge.

“Yes and no. They’re a strange bunch, especially now without Brook.”

“What was she like?”

“Brook?” Craig sat at the table next to Kirsten. “She was the centerpiece of the family. Everyone revolved around her.” His eyes misted over. “You know what I mean?”

Kirsten smiled. “Yes, I guess I do.”

“When she died it was like everyone drifted apart. The only thing holding them together now is that little girl of hers.”

“Can I ask what happened?”

“Mmm,” Craig murmured as he filled a bowl with fruit and slid it in front of Kirsty.

“She was killed in a riding accident. She was out horse riding with Tyler one day and she was knocked off going under a tree. It was really tragic.”

“Horses?” Kirsten questioned. “Beth never said anything yesterday about having horses.”

Craig shook his head. “No, Beth got rid of the horses shortly after the accident. Said she didn’t want anything like that to happen to anyone else, especially Sarah.” He sighed. “You know what little girls are like with horses.”

“Oh, yes.” Kirsten smiled. “How sad.”

“Yeah, it was pretty sad. Brook was a beautiful girl. She and James made a fantastic couple. He just hasn’t been the same since she died. None of them have.”

“And what about the father, Beth’s husband, where is he?”

“Good luck getting any of them to talk about that. He’s in America. Beth left him to come to New Zealand. Some big-shot Texan. She came here alone with the kids, so I can only assume she wanted to get them as far away from their father as possible.”

“Oh,” Kirsten pondered.

Craig’s weathered face creased into a smile. “I hope none of this puts you off.”

Kirsten grinned. “No not at all. We all have skeletons in the closet, don’t we?”

Craig raised his eyebrows. “Okay. What’s your story then?”

Kirsten sighed. “You really don’t want to see my dirty laundry. Besides, it’s rather boring compared to the sound of things here.”

Kirsten’s skeleton was a married man she had left behind in Christchurch; her previous employer no less. She certainly wasn’t ready to talk about that one yet, especially with someone she had just met.

Craig smiled. “I understand completely. Let me give you just one piece of advice.”

“What’s that?”

“You seem like a really nice girl, Kirsty. So make sure you don’t get involved with this family too much. Don’t get me wrong, individually they’re nice. I have a lot of time

for Beth, she’s like family and as an employer she’s always looked out for me. Tyler is a great businessman, and friend, but there’s something about him I haven’t been able to put my finger on yet. James is a great kid, a lesser father, and a troubled individual. Together they’re like fireworks in a barrel. Don’t get caught in the middle whatever you do. Look after Sarah, do your job, but make sure you keep some things for yourself.”

“Wow.” Kirsten stared wide-eyed at Craig but he just laughed.

“Hey, don’t get me wrong. You look like a smart woman, Kirsty, and I’m sure you know how to look after yourself.”

“So, what happened to the last nanny,” Kirsty grinned, “was she eaten alive?”

Craig leaned back and hung one arm over the back of the chair as he chuckled, “Not quite.”

Chapter 3

It took Sarah no time at all to become comfortable with Kirsten as they walked the grounds after breakfast. They started their tour at the back of the house, where Sarah took Kirsten by the hand and showed her Craig’s garden. Organic vegetables grew in neat rows, bordered by fruit trees and citrus bushes, berry plants and a glass house full of tomatoes. Hidden behind a lattice fence, overgrown with ivy, was an in-ground Jacuzzi, and further beyond another fence sheltered a tennis court. Leaving this area, they walked down through the bush to another clearing on the western side of the house. There were two small paddocks, wire fenced with a white painted wooden top rail. Barrels and striped posts lay scattered on the grass in one area, forgotten by the riders in the family.

Sarah’s face was mournful as she explained, “This is where the horses used to live.”

“Shall we go down to the beach then?” Kirsten changed the subject. Sarah’s face brightened. “Okay.”

She skipped next to Kirsten as they wound their way down through the bush further, along a clay path and down to the sea. It was not a sandy beach, rather tiny yellow and white stones covered the shore. At either end of the small bay the rubble grew to rock, jutting out from each point in tumbling piles. Toward the northern end of the beach an old unpainted jetty stood out against the hills which enclosed the rest of the sound. From here Kirsten could see the remainder of the Heads, the wide sweeping mud sound that closed them in with a dead end then continued on to pass them again on the other side, about three kilometres across.

She removed her shoes and waded into the water, and Sarah did the same, dancing with delight in the shallows as they held hands.

“Don’t you play in the water much?” Kirsten was quite surprised by her reaction at being allowed to go into the sea.

“In the pool I do,” she said matter-of-factly.

“Huh, well we’ll have to change that, won’t we?”

Sarah grinned as she stooped to put her hand in the salty water. Kirsten stared out to sea. It was truly a golden paradise living here, but she wasn’t convinced it was the greatest place for someone like Sarah. She thought back to her own childhood, filled with sports activities, friends invading the house every weekend, school productions and generally complaining about having to hold hands with the boys for dance lessons. Sarah’s childhood seemed strangely quiet compared to her own.

“Do you like living here, Sarah?”

Sarah’s nose crinkled as she stared, puzzled by the question. “If I didn’t live here then I wouldn’t see Grammy, or Uncle Tyler.”

Kirsten stifled her laughter at such a sweet answer, given so candidly. “What I mean Sarah is . . .,” she thought about the words Sarah had just uttered, and realised that she had inadvertently given her answer. She changed her tack. “Okay, aside from being here with Grammy and Uncle Tyler, what do you like about living here?”

The young girl shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know.”

Kirsten waded back to the shallows and squatted down in front of Sarah, who regarded her with curiosity as she said, “Then that’s something else I’m going to have to change, isn’t it?”

They wandered along collecting empty white cockle shells from between the rocks. Sarah stuffed a select few into the pocket of her denim skirt. Kirsten stared up at the stifling midday sun as her stomach growled loudly. She realised Beth had been right in what she had said the night before. The fresh country air had already stimulated her appetite.

“What do you say we head home for some lunch, kiddo?”

“Okay,” Sarah ran a few steps ahead of Kirsten as they made their way back up the hill.

Tyler was waiting for them when they arrived back at the house. Kirsten made sandwiches and they ate a quick lunch before packing a cooler of juice and heading down to the jetty. The boat was not what Kirsten had expected. After the house had outweighed her expectations, she should have realised it would not be a simple fishing vessel. The Sassy Lady was a thirty foot cruiser, complete with a fully stocked bar and television in the large open plan cabin below.

Tyler lifted Sarah onto the deck then extended his hand to help Kirsten aboard.

“Thanks.” She staggered as she found her sea legs. The boat swayed gently beneath them as water lapped between the boat and the wharf. Kirsten walked to the other side to peer down into the water. The glare of the sun on the surface was so intense she had to shield her eyes with one hand.

“First things first.” Tyler disappeared inside the cabin and returned carrying two life jackets. “Come on little lady.” He helped Sarah into her floatation device as Kirsten watched with admiration. It was clear in his reactions to Sarah, just how much she meant to him. His eyes gleamed whenever he looked at her. When he was finished with Sarah he turned to Kirsten. “You ever used one of these before?”

Kirsten smiled and shook her head. “No, I haven’t.”

“Come on then.” Tyler beckoned as he held it up for her to slip into. Kirsten backed into the jacket and slipped her arms into the holes. Tyler wrapped the front around her, his head right behind her own as he fumbled with the ties. He was taller than her by at least four inches, and she felt unexpectedly nervous having him this close. His big hands held her by the jacket and he turned her around, his eyes focused on the straps as he pulled them beneath her arms and across her chest. The corners of his mouth turned up into a cheeky smile, as if he sensed and was enjoying her discomfort. She had to admit, he was extremely attractive, his dark brooding eyes and long eyelashes just one of his many endearing features. She cringed as she remembered what had happened with the last man she worked for. Sometimes a little harmless flirting could spiral out of control. She was determined not to repeat the mistakes she had made with Greg.

“That’s not too tight is it?” Tyler’s eyes glinted playfully in the sunlight. Kirsten allowed a smile to escape. “It’s firm, but I wouldn’t say it’s tight.”

“Good.” Tyler straightened up and left her with Sarah, going instead to loosen the ropes which held the boat to the jetty.

The girls sat at the back of the boat while Tyler drove to the Salmon farm. Kirsten loved the feel of the salt spray on her face, the sound of the engine as it roared beneath them and the thick white foam wake which spread out behind them like a thick layer of whipped egg whites. Sarah grinned and laughed all the way, enjoying the ride with childish enthusiasm.

If this is what life is going to be like here, Kirsten thought, surely I’m in heaven.

Eventually Tyler slowed the engines and they pulled up to another boat in a secluded bay. A young man about Kirsten’s age appeared and tied the boat securely alongside.

“Hey boss,” he greeted Tyler.

“Brian. How’re things this afternoon?”

“Good, good,” Brian confirmed, “we’re just about to do the afternoon feed.”

“Great.” Tyler flashed a smile at his niece and ruffled her hair. “We’re just in time. Wanna check out the fish?”

Sarah wore a grin from ear to ear as she nodded.

Tyler took her hand and helped her climb aboard the second boat. The smaller craft was a practical and sturdy working boat. Brian took the girl’s hand and helped her down.

“Brian, this is Kirsty.” Tyler took her hand and pulled her onto the seat. She stepped between the boats, now swaying out of time with the wake their approach had caused. She wobbled, nearly losing her balance before Brian took hold of her. She leaned into him, letting his strong grip steady her as she stepped down onto the deck.

“Hi, Kirsty.” He had the bluest eyes Kirsten had ever seen, so light they were almost silver. She could barely drag her gaze away.

“Hi, Brian.” She regained her composure and let go of him. She made a mental note that she would have to find her sea legs pretty soon, before she ended up in the arms of too many strange, but attractive men.

“Kirsty is the new Nanny.” Tyler took the gap between the boats in one stride, making it look like child’s play.

“Oh, cool.” Brian winked at Sarah. “Lucky you huh?”

Sarah grinned. “Yep.”

They made their way onto a wooden platform, suspended above the water to form a track around a group of rounded metal frames, each about twenty feet in diametre. From each frame hung a mesh net, which disappeared down into the green depths of the water. An older man, cigarette sticking precariously from his mouth, was busy scooping red pellets from a twenty litre bucket into each net. Kirsten watched as a myriad of fish began to appear, their silver bodies twisting and turning in the water as they found the food. The surface of the water bubbled as they thrashed in their frenzy.

“Wow.” Kirsten leaned over the rail to get a better look as Tyler appeared at her side.

“They’re Chinook Salmon,” He pointed. “Or King Salmon as they’re commonly called.”

Sarah was busy hopping from one foot to the other, watching her reflection in the water.

“Sarah, come here sweetie. I don’t want you falling in the water.” Kirsten took hold of her hand and turned back to watch the fish. “How many in each net?” She asked as she counted the rows of nets.

Tyler grinned. “You wanna go down and count?”

“No thanks.”

“There would be several hundred in each net, if we’re lucky.”

“That’s a lot of cat food.” Kirsten teased.

Tyler scowled in disapproval. “The finest Salmon in the country, thank you very much.”

* * * *

When they arrived back at the wharf around four o’clock Kirsten felt like a salty sea dog. Her hair and bare legs were caked with sea spray. She was pleased she had at least pulled her hair back into a pony tail for the day; otherwise it would be a bird’s nest by now.

She figured herself unlucky she had inherited the recessive gene for red hair and freckled skin. This came from her father’s side of the family. She would appreciate it more if her hair was straight, but it curled and had a mind of its own. People always said how pretty it was, but Kirsten hated it. Other parts of her were acceptable. She liked the curve of her athletic legs and the hourglass shape of her torso, but her pale skin never tanned.

She removed her life jacket as Tyler helped Sarah out of hers then they walked up the hill to the house. Sarah skipped a few metres ahead, singing happily under her breath as she grabbed branches and pulled leaves from nearby trees.

“Is she always this happy?” Kirsten asked. Sarah was a delight to watch, her long blonde hair bounced behind her as she moved.

“Most of the time. She has her moments like any kids, but she’s pretty good.”

“Where does the blonde hair come from?”

Tyler’s smile faltered. “Must be Jamie’s side of the family. The Frampton’s are all dark and brooding.”

Something about his voice made Kirsten almost stop in her tracks. It made her wonder if the animosity between the two men was so bad that Tyler didn’t even like mentioning Sarah’s father. Or was it something else?

“Oh?” Kirsten swung the topic back to Tyler; she suspected it was his favourite subject. “Dark blood?”

“South American on my father’s side, Greek on my mother’s side, I think.” He smiled. “Though she will maintain her family is strictly English.”

His attempt at a proper English accent made Kirsten giggle. As they came up out of the bush and onto the lawn, Sarah rushed off to the terrace. Something had caught her eye.

“Dad!” Her sneaker-clad feet pounded up the path toward the man who stood at the edge of the concrete patio. She flung herself into his arms and he swept her up with no effort.

James was taller than Kirsty had pictured him, with a lean frame and mousy hair. Nothing about him gave away the fact he was Sarah’s father. Except for the blonde hair, Sarah looked just like Brook. He had just showered or swam, for his hair was still damp, and as the gap between them lessened Kirsten noticed he smelled divine; a masculine mixture of musk and woody high notes.

“Hi, honey bear.” Jamie hugged his daughter. “Mmmm, I missed you.”

“I missed you too, Dad.” Sarah wrapped her arms around Jamie’s neck and squeezed.

“James,” Tyler acknowledged as he walked up the steps.

“Tyler.” James dropped his smile. “How’s business?”

“Pretty good.” Tyler stood on the patio, feet apart, hands dug deep into his pockets. Jamie moved Sarah to his hip, pushed his shoulders back and chest out. He had a tanned, slender neck and a prominent Adams apple.

Kirsten watched them together. They were like two male dogs. She half expected them to cock their legs in order to see who could get their scent furthest up the wall. She cleared her throat and stepped forward to get Jamie’s attention.

“Hi, I’m Kirsty.” Expecting a similar greeting in return she smiled. Instead Jamie eyed her with speculation as he looked down his long nose at her.

“Hello.” His tone was unemotional and dismissive. Kirsten clenched her hands together, feeling like she had been splashed with a bucket of cold water. Tyler walked to the French doors. “Well, it’s been a hoot as usual, Jamie, but I’m going to get ready for dinner.” He turned to Kirsten. “Thanks for your company today, Kirsty. I hope you enjoyed your tour.”

“The pleasure was mine, thank you.”

Jamie’s look softened as he set Sarah back on her feet. “You better go clean up for dinner too, Princess.”

“Okay.” Sarah ran after her uncle and the two disappeared into the house.

“So, are you here for long, Miss-?” Jamie spoke in a monotone he seemed to reserve for everyone except Sarah. He looked as though here were waiting for her to fill in the blank.

“Rhodes, but please it’s Kirsty.” She tried to smile despite his glare. “Sorry, am I here for long? I don’t understand the question.”

Jamie laughed snidely. “What a surprise, another intelligent one,” he spoke under his breath, as if to himself, but it was obvious she was supposed to hear. “How long are you staying here at the house?”

Kirsty frowned. It was as if he didn’t know who she was. “As long as Beth wants me to I guess.” She put her hand up to her chest. “I’m the new Nanny.”

“The what?” Jamie thundered as he took a step toward her. His face filled with rage.

“Jesus Christ, that old bitch has done it again hasn’t she? I’m gone five minutes and she’s organised my life for me.”

Before Kirsten could say anything Jamie turned on his heel and stormed into the house. She was left standing alone and bewildered on the front steps, wondering what had just happened.

Why would Jamie not know about her? What reason would Beth have for going behind his back? Sarah was his daughter; surely Beth would have included him in any decision concerning her welfare.

Moments later she heard shouting from the floors above. Jamie’s voice boomed down in deep, angry tones from the open window of Beth’s office. Kirsten cringed. What had she done?

She decided for Sarah’s sake she should go and find out if everything was okay upstairs. When she got to the second floor, the door of Beth’s office was ajar, and Kirsten could see that Tyler had joined in the foray. Both men stood, one either side of the desk, Tyler poised in defense with his back to his mother. Kirsten continued down the hall to Sarah’s room. The little girl sat at the edge of the bed. She had been changing her clothes when the fighting began, but was now slumped in her t-shirt and knickers, her face a picture of worry and concern. Tears glistened in her baby doll eyes as she looked up at Kirsten.

“Oh it’s okay, honey.” Kirsten knelt down beside Sarah and rubbed her hand. “Grown ups fight, they’re not mad at you.”

“I know,” Sarah sobbed. “But I don’t like it when they yell.”

“They don’t yell at you like this do they?” Kirsten asked with concern. It was a question she felt compelled to ask.

“No.”

Kirsten let out a sigh of relief. “Good.” She reached for the tiny skirt that Sarah had laid on the bed. “Let’s get you looking pretty for your dad then shall we?”

The small girl smiled at the thought and stood up for Kirsten to help her. After she was dressed Kirsten brushed Sarah’s hair and divided it into pigtails, fastening them with two purple ribbons Sarah picked out from her top drawer.

“Now you look beautiful.” Kirsten smiled as Sarah admired her appearance in the full length mirror on the wardrobe door.

Sarah beamed, “Thank you, Kirsty.”

“You’re welcome, honey.” She took Sarah’s hand and they walked down stairs to the kitchen to find out what Craig was preparing for dinner. The shouting had subsided in Beth’s office, and Tyler had disappeared. Beth and Jamie now seemed to be having a deep discussion about something else.

Glorious smells wafted from the kitchen as they approached, and they found Craig at the table reading the paper. He looked guilty as they entered, and smiled as he lifted a can of beer.

“Ah, caught you.” Kirsten teased.

“Hey, I have to have one vice,” Craig said huskily.

“Do you mind if Miss Ess keeps you company for a while?” Kirsten asked. “The grown ups are probably not good company right now.”

“Daddy’s mad,” Sarah chimed in.

Craig smiled. “Yeah, I heard something going on up there, what was that about?”

“Me unfortunately.” Kirsten grimaced.

“Oh.” Craig nodded in understanding.

“I have to get changed for dinner. Will you stay here and help Craig?”

Sarah nodded and smiled at Craig. She climbed onto the big man’s lap, linking her arm around his neck. “I’ll help set the table.”

“Good girl.” Kirsten left them and returned to the back passage. Wanting to avoid the second floor, she climbed into the small service lift, which took her right to the hallway outside her own room. She showered and changed, thankful to finally have the sand and salt out of her hair.

She pondered her first day in her new surroundings. Spending the majority of the day with Sarah had been a great idea. She felt a strong connection between them and hoped that would simply grow the more time they spent together. Sarah lacked so much stimulation and Kirsten was excited at the prospect of being able to provide that for the little girl. The boat trip had been fantastic; Tyler a charming and intriguing host. Then a black storm called Jamie had moved in to ruin her day. She had never met anyone like him. The animosity he carried for Tyler was like a thick oozing substance you could cut with a knife. Yet when he looked at Sarah it all just melted away. The little girl truly was the glue holding them all together.

As she came downstairs again she noticed Beth was still in her office, alone this time. Nervously Kirsten stood in the doorway and knocked on the wood paneled door. Beth smiled when she realised it was Kirsty.

“Sorry if I caused any trouble before,” Kirsten said. Beth stood up. “That,” she pointed a bony finger, “was not your fault. It was mine. I was too slow catching that one before it happened. I only hope it didn’t cause you too much discomfort.”

Kirsten smiled. “No not at all.” She had always been a good liar.

“His bark is worse than his bite, believe you me.”

“Okay, I’ll leave you to it. See you at dinner.” Kirsten retreated and headed down the next flight of stairs. She heard footfalls behind her, faster than her own, and she turned to see Jamie, fast closing the gap between them.

“Kirsty, can we speak?” he asked before she had a chance to say anything. His tone had vastly improved since they last spoke.

“Of course.” She stopped and turned. The material of her red cullots swished around her ankles.

He descended the rest of the stairs before he lowered his head and looked at his hands.

“I feel really stupid about earlier.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Kirsty dismissed. “I can understand you being mad, considering.”

Jamie raised his green eyes to hers. “No it’s more than that. I was an arse, even before I went off my rocker about Beth. I just want you to know that it had nothing to do with you.”

Kirsten guessed this was his way of apologising. She smiled. “Apology accepted.”

She expected a smile in return but was not rewarded with one. His face was a blank canvas she couldn’t put an emotion to.

“Do you know where Sarah is?” he asked instead.

“Ah-huh, she’s in the kitchen with Craig.”

“Thanks.” He wandered off in the direction of the kitchen, leaving Kirsten even more bewildered than before. She watched him go. No wonder they didn’t all get along. Never before had Kirsten met two such different men. Tyler seemed so full of himself; confident, possibly a little arrogant, but nice enough with it. Jamie was mysterious and unnerving, yet he showed so much love for Sarah it was hard to comprehend he was this other person with everyone else. Kirsten smiled to herself. The words dysfunctional arsehole’ came to mind, but she was willing to reserve final judgment until after she had taken more time to get to know him better.

If nothing else the next few weeks were going to be very interesting. She put on her kid gloves and wandered through to the lounge to enjoy the last of the evening sun.

Chapter 4

Dinner was another success, cooked to perfection with Craig’s endless talent. The atmosphere in the dining room, however, was less than desirable. Kirsten sat between Tyler and Jamie. Fire and Ice, she decided to call them. The conversation was strained, to say the least. Kirsten half expected a request from Jamie to ask Beth to pass the salt. Instead he spent most of the meal chatting to Sarah, about his latest trip to the Nelson Lakes District. He was currently being commissioned to paint pictures of native birds and plants for a book based on the area. Kirsten spent her time fielding questions from the other three at the table. Being the newcomer they wanted to know all about her, her family and her background. By the time the meal was over she was tired of talking about herself. The artificial peace in the room carried them all safely through the meal. After dessert Beth and Tyler took coffee through to the lounge, while Sarah sweet-talked Jamie into watching a movie with her. Kirsty joined Craig in the kitchen to help with clean up duties.

Craig grinned down at her as they stood side by side, hand washing the dishes too big to fit into the dishwasher.

“So, what do you make of the family now?” he asked.

Kirsten smiled. “Well, they’re certainly different.”

He chuckled. “That’s one word for them.”

“How do you do it, day in and day out?”

Craig sighed. “They’re not always like this. You have to remember, I was here when Brook was alive. I know what they used to be like. Now that she’s gone they all seem to be lost.”

“Jamie seems so angry,” Kirsten noted.

“Yeah, I think that’s a lot of it. He just doesn’t know where he fits in this picture anymore. Brook was his whole world, and now Sarah is all he has left of her.”

“He obviously loves her to bits. Why does he spend so much time away, I just can’t understand it?”

Craig reached for a towel to wipe his hands. “Ours is not to question why, remember?”

“I know. It’s so hard reminding yourself that you’re just the hired help though, isn’t it?”

“Ah-huh.” Craig crossed to the fridge and took out a can of beer. “You want one of these?”

Kirsten smiled. “Sure, why not.”

They sat in the cool breeze at the back porch, among the ferns and native trees that had been planted to form a small private alcove. This is where Tyler found them; talking and laughing as though they were already old friends.

“I thought I’d find you two here.” He crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame, his body silhouetted by the kitchen lights.

Craig glanced at his watch. “I was just about to head home actually.”

“I thought I might crank up the hot pool.” Tyler smirked. “I thought an old man like you could do with a soak.”

“Make it another night and I’m there. But right now I’m ready to hit the sack. I’ve got a big day planned tomorrow.”

Tyler turned his attention to Kirsten. “What about you, Kirsty? Wanna check out the Jacuzzi?”

Kirsten had to admit she was dying to try the spa pool, but jumping in with Tyler was probably not the best idea in the world. “I haven’t even unpacked my swimsuit yet.” If Craig had been staying then she wouldn’t have hesitated.

“Well, that’s never stopped anyone before.” Tyler winked at Craig. His words were her decision maker. Her forehead crinkled in disapproval. “No, I think I’ll just have an early night. I still have unpacking to do.”

“Party poopers,” Tyler said flippantly. “Oh well, if you change your mind you know where I’ll be.” He flicked his towel over his shoulder and wandered off into the dark. Kirsten said goodnight to Craig then picked her way through the house. The mansion, while beautiful was so huge and quiet, not the little family box she was used to in Christchurch which rattled with activity. The lavishness of it just seemed depressing as darkness fell. Certainly money did not buy happiness, Kirsten thought as she stopped on the stairs for a book to read. As she passed Beth’s room she noticed the door was wide open, but its occupant was nowhere to be seen. She wondered briefly where Beth was. They had long since finished coffee in the lounge when Kirsten passed, so she assumed the matriarch had retired for the evening. Maybe she had gone for a walk. It was such a nice evening, and the stars were so much brighter here, away from the smog, showing the way where streetlights normally would. Kirsten guessed it would be much safer walking here at night than in the city as well.

When she got to the third floor her bedroom was stifling hot. She flicked on the light and opened the patio door to allow the cooler night air to circulate into the room. The curtains wafted in and out on the breeze, bringing instant comfort. Kirsten unrolled the electric power cord from around her portable radio and plugged it in, rolling the tuning dial to find a radio station. The reception was fuzzy, but she finally found a semi suitable FM frequency.

She set about unpacking the remainder of her things and it wasn’t long before the room started to feel more like home. After a short while she heard a strange tapping noise above the sound of the music. It was just loud enough to be annoying. Kirsten frowned as she turned down the radio, straining to hear where the sound was coming from. She realised a soft buzzing accompanied the random sequence of the tapping, like something hard hitting canvas. As she stood up from her cross legged position on the floor a large beetle found the gap in the curtains and flew into the room. It was the ugliest thing Kirsten had ever seen, about four centimetres long with curled antennae stretched another two centimetres in front of its head. It had a thick brown body and crustaceous patterned wings. She screamed as it flew into her, its spiked legs clawing her hair as it passed. Not unlike a moth, it had been drawn in by the light, and it flew now, blinded and dazed, around the room. As it hit the wall there was a syrupy clunk, not a soft thud as a moth would make. If it had not given her such a fright Kirsten may have been impressed by such a creature, but now she swatted at it with a shoe and squealed as it dive bombed the carpet, then took to flight once more. Vaguely she heard footsteps on the stairs, the door opened and Jamie burst into the room, his face the picture of concern. When he saw Kirsten flailing in desperation at the invader, he laughed. Kirsten wasn’t sure what to be more shocked about, the hideous beetle or the alien sound of Jamie’s amusement.

Jamie stepped further into the room, and closing the door behind him he switched off the light. For a moment panic gripped Kirsty, for she could no longer see where the

beetle was. But as her eyes adjusted to the darkness once more she realised the horrible insect sounds had ceased. Jamie’s laughter continued as he stepped toward the balcony and pulled back the curtain, his face illuminated by the moonlight.

“Jesus Christ, what is that thing?” Kirsten felt her heart beating wildly in her chest. Jamie reached out his long fingers, plucked the insect off the wall and cocooned it into his hand.

“It’s a Huhu Beetle.” He moved closer to Kirsten but she backed away in haste.

“A what?”

“No who.” Jamie grinned. Kirsten blinked back at him in the dark. He seemed like a completely different person to the one she had met earlier in the day. And now he was actually making jokes with her. She couldn’t help but smile back at him.

“I’ve heard of a Huhu grub, but not a beetle.”

Jamie opened his hand and the insect crawled slowly up the sleeve of his shirt. “Well, this is what they look like when they grow up.”

Kirsten shrank back nervously. “God, they’re hideous.” She shivered thinking about those prickly legs crawling on her skin.

“They’re pretty harmless. He’s got a decent set of mandibles, but he’ll only bite when threatened.” Jamie’s hair fell over his eyes, throwing shadows across his face. A bit like you I expect, Kirsten thought as she watched him. He looked quite stunning in the pale moonlight with his angular jaw line and the soft shape of his mouth as it curled into dimples.

He walked to the door and threw the Huhu into the air. It hummed away slowly into the night sky. Kirsten pulled the curtain back into her hand and leaned against the door frame as Jamie approached the windows from the outside.

“You should have your shutters closed,” he instructed as he pulled them loose from their restraints. “That way you can have the windows open when the light is on.”

Kirsten was pleased he couldn’t see her cheeks redden. “I didn’t even realise there were shutters.”

Jamie chuckled under his breath. After the conversation earlier she had no doubt he thought her to be a scatterbrain.

“Why does that not surprise me?” Jamie clicked the first shutter into the window frame and walked across to the second. He glanced down at Kirsten, and seeing her expression he added, “That’s nothing against you, just everyone else around here.”

“I’m sorry you weren’t told I was coming,” Kirsten stammered, feeling apologetic for something that should have been none of her concern.

“Yeah, me too. But shit happens doesn’t it?”

Kirsten wasn’t sure what to say.

Jamie came back into the room and as Kirsten straightened up, he closed the door behind them.

“Sarah thinks you’re pretty hot shit anyway.” A small smile crept into the corners of his mouth. “And I have no doubt you’re probably extremely competent. So sending you away would be cutting off my nose to spite my face wouldn’t it?”

Kirsten smiled. “Indeed.”

Jamie opened the bedroom door and light flooded in from the hallway.

“You should be safe from bugs now.” He teased her with another smile. “Just make sure you only open the door at night when the light is out.” He stepped away to the stairs. “Good night, Kirsty.”

“Good night.” Kirsty watched him go. “Jamie?” she asked as he took hold of the banister. He turned and looked at her questioningly. “Thank you.”

There was no reply, he simply turned and disappeared back down the stairs.

* * * *

Kirsten woke late the next morning. It was a little cooler than the day before, and with the sweet night air filtering into her room she had been able to sleep better. After a quick breakfast Beth had some paperwork to go over with her so they adjourned to her office to discuss business. A lesson plan had arrived from the correspondence school, giving Kirsten a good chance to go over what Sarah had been, and would be learning. She took her homework to the patio and sat in a blue striped lounger to study. It was incredibly quiet in the bay, Tyler had taken the boat out to the salmon farm and Jamie had whisked Sarah away to visit friends nearby. Beth had donned a sun hat and disappeared in the back garden to help Craig plant tomatoes in the greenhouse.

Sitting in the heat of the day soon got to be too much, and Kirsten decided to take a break. She rode the lift to the third floor and changed into her bathing suit. The cool clear water of the pool was so refreshing on her skin, the blue painted concrete bottom a reflection of the azure sky. She lay on her back and floated, watching the occasional slow moving cloud cross from one side of the bay to the other. When she had cooled off she took her paperwork and headed to the pool house. It was cooler than the patio; the canvas sun shades across the full length windows blocked the afternoon heat. She stretched on a bench seat in the corner of the room, which was decorated with large calico pillows. The wooden crafted sofa creaked under her weight as she made herself comfortable. Standing up again she lifted the cushion and discovered there were nails missing from one of the wide boards. It looked as though they had been pulled out intentionally. Prying the corner of the plank loose with her fingernail, Kirsty lifted it from its groove. Beneath the boards Kirsten could just make out a rectangle of bulk, set against the dark floorboards a few feet below. She reached in, her arm disappearing all the way until her arm pit and shoulder prohibited her from going further. She felt a flap of soft leather against her fingers and she grasped it tightly, pulling it up through the gap she had made. It was a book, the cover dusty with age and neglect. As she opened the cover the spine creaked in protest, stiff from sitting unopened for so long.

Brook’s Diary.

Kirsten ran her fingers across the words, musing over the handwriting of a woman who had long ago deserted the living.

She wondered why Brook had hidden her diary here, rather than in the confines of her own room. Were there thoughts so secret within that she couldn’t bare the thought of anyone reading them?

Kirsten slipped the diary back into its hiding place, feeling guilty that she had even contemplated reading Brook’s personal thoughts.

If it was Kirsten’s diary she would be mortified to think someone was reading her innermost private thoughts. A diary was a sacred thing, meant for one person only; the author. But now that Brook was dead, didn’t this rightfully belong to Jamie? Wouldn’t her family want to know about it?

Kirsten wondered how it would be received if she were to take this to Jamie now. She didn’t know him well enough yet to gauge what his reaction would be. Maybe when the time was right she could tell him about it. But right now, based on what she knew of Jamie, she didn’t feel right about doing that either. So for now, until she decided what to do about the diary, it would remain her secret. Hers and Brook’s.

Chapter 5

“Pack up your things, Sarah. We’re going on a field trip.”

The girl’s face lit up, even though she didn’t know what a field trip was. But it sounded like it would get her out of lessons in the hot classroom, therefore she was as keen as mustard.

Kirsten watched Sarah as she jumped up from the desk, nearly spilling her chair onto the floor behind her. Her hair had been French braided and thin wisps that had escaped floated around her angelic face.

“Where are we going?” Her brown eyes were wide with curiosity. Oh to be seven again, Kirsten thought as she helped Sarah put a sweatshirt into her pink Barbie backpack.

“For a drive. It’s Friday and you’ve been good all week, so I think it’s time for some outdoor activity.”

“Yay.” Sarah skipped merrily to the door. “A field trip, a field trip,” she chanted in time to her own steps.

Beth had told Kirsten she could make use of the four wheel drive whenever it was free, and she had yet to take advantage of the offer. She was keen to explore the sound, but had wanted first to get into a routine with Sarah and her schooling. Sarah had proved to be an astute student. She was keen to learn and worked hard for her seven years. She had a wonderful imagination but was limited to what she wrote about because of her confinement to the same people and surroundings day in and day out. She desperately needed more social contact. Kirsten thought her creative writing would blossom if she had more inspiration.

Hence, the motivation for the field trip.

After first telling Craig where they were going, in case anyone came looking for them, they set off in the Toyota. Kirsten had never driven on a shingle road before, much less a road that twisted and turned on what was practically a single lane, rising and falling around each hill like a rickety rollercoaster. She drove slowly, picking her way around the tranquil bays marked with dusty yellow road signs. She soon discovered it was not easy to get lost for the road would on in one direction and there were very few cross roads. Another positive was that oncoming traffic churned up a huge trail of dust, giving Kirsten plenty of time to pull over or slow down.

After nearly an hour they came into a wide sweeping bay which seemed more densely populated than those they had already passed. The road here had been tar sealed in places and a small community hall set back off the road seemed to be the centre of the community. Next to this were tennis courts and three tiny buildings. Kirsten pulled the car over by the side of the road and stared in surprise. It was a school. Children played on a field, set high above the main room on a large flat area. Young girls donned roller blades and zoomed up and down the pathways, while boys kicked a soccer ball and others played a semi coordinated game of basketball at one end of the tennis courts. A large backboard for this purpose had been erected at either end of the courts, the nets hung in disrepair from much use.

“Huh, who would have thought,” Kirsten muttered under her breath. Then to Sarah she said, “I don’t suppose you knew there was a school here?”

Sarah shook her head, but her eyes were fixed on the scene before her as if she had never seen so many children in one place. And of course she hadn’t. Her life was filled with adults and grown up things, with the occasional play date with a girl down the road, thrown in for good measure.

The handbrake creaked as Kirsten put the car in park. “Do you want to go take a look?”

Sarah stared at Kirsten as if she had suggested there was a giant spider in her hair.

“Come on. Let’s go see what the kids are up to.”

They climbed out of the car and Kirsten felt Sarah take hold of her arm. The thumb of her other hand slid into her mouth as they walked up the steps. The old galvanized gate squeaked on its hinges as they entered, and clunked noisily shut behind them, announcing their arrival.

They located the small staffroom, where a middle aged man and two portly women sat with hot drinks, enjoying their break from the children.

“Hi,” the elder of the two women greeted them. “Can we help you?” She looked to be in her mid thirties, which a bush of unruly sand coloured hair. She had a generous figure which had long ago out grown jeans, into wide tracksuit pants and long, loose fitting shirts.

“Hi, I’m Kirsty and this is Sarah.” She squeezed Sarah’s hand. “We were just in the area and I thought Sarah might enjoy seeing your school.”

“Great, how old are you, Sarah?” The woman’s knees popped as she brought herself down to Sarah’s level.

“Seven,” Sarah whispered. She rested her head against Kirsten’s arm for reassurance.

“Well, my name is Anne, and this is Tania.” She pointed to the younger woman who smiled. “And this man is Gary, he teaches the big kids.”

“How many children do you have here?” Kirsten asked.

“We’ve got thirty-three at the moment. Next year we get another three new entrants and lose two of the big kids to high school.”

The answer spiked Kirsten’s curiosity. “How far away do they travel from? Such a spread out area must have kids coming from all directions.”

“Some of them are in the Bay. Some come from over in Manaroa.” Anne pointed behind her toward the hill in the north. “We have a bus that goes to the Kenepuru Heads to pick children up, and then it goes all the way round the other way to Nopera, about forty kilometres.”

“Wow, that’s a long way just to get kids to school.” Kirsten’s mind ticked over as she spoke.

“Where do you live, Sarah?” Anne asked.

Sarah shrugged, obviously confused about how far they had come and where they were. She looked up at Kirsten for the answer.

“Just over the way, about five minutes the other side of Portage Hotel.” Kirsten patted Sarah’s hand as she jiggled from one foot to the other.

“Oh, so you’re locals?” Anne straightened her back and returned to Kirsten’s level.

“I’m Sarah’s new Nanny, so I’ve only been here a week, but Sarah’s family have been in the area a long time.”

“Who does her schooling?”

“She learns by correspondence.”

“Gee, that’s pretty grown up of you, Sarah.” Anne flashed a pretty smile at the little girl. “Would you like to come and meet some of the other kids?”

Sarah nodded as curiosity stole her timidity and she began to look around the room. To reach the staff room they had walked through the largest of the three classrooms. It seemed to be the room where the older children learned, for the artwork here consisted of clay models and intricate pictures of animals in various careful colours. Titles were done in precise hand drawn block letters, and the problems on the large green chalk board were of a level that Kirsten guessed a twelve year old would find challenging.

* * * *

Sarah and Kirsten spent the rest of the afternoon at the Waitaria Bay School. Kirsten watched as Sarah painted with another small girl who was the same age. She was always a happy child, but now she was among her peers she seemed like a different person. She didn’t have to attempt to understand the grown ups or act as though she should be seen and not heard. This was what she needed. Somehow, Kirsten had to find a way to make sure Sarah got more of this stimulation.

When they arrived home, Sarah was eager to tell her grandmother all about her visit to the local school. Unsure of whether Beth would be pleased or not, Kirsten thought it best that Sarah tell her. The innocence and excitement so plainly written on her face may soften the blow and work to Kirsten’s advantage later on. So instead she slipped upstairs to get changed for dinner, letting Sarah go straight to the kitchen where Beth sat at the table with the newspaper.

Refreshed once more, she slipped down to the lounge, where she found Jamie on the patio, sitting at an easel in the bright afternoon light. She sat on the edge of the couch and watched him, undetected, careful not to disturb his concentration. He seemed lost in his own world, paint brush dangled softly in one hand, his brow furrowed into rows over his narrow eyes.

Heavy footsteps on the stairs behind them caught Jamie’s attention, and Kirsty had but a moment to smile in acknowledgement before Tyler burst into the room, destroying any chance she may have had of carrying a civilized conversation with him.

“Afternoon everyone,” Tyler chirped as he rolled the sleeves of his denim shirt up over his broad forearms.

“Hi.” Kirsten watched the two men together. Jamie’s back stiffened and the wall that always seemed to go up whenever Tyler was around resurrected itself.

“Where’s Sarah?” Jamie addressed Kirsten in a curt manner.

“She’s in the kitchen with your mother.” Kirsten glared back at him. She was beginning to tire of his impolite conversations which began with an almost accusatory tone. Could he not even be courteous enough to begin a conversation with a simple hello? She had been nothing but polite to this man. What gave him the right to continue the obnoxious renderings which did him no favours?

“I came up to see her this afternoon, but you’d had taken her away.” Jamie put his brush in the jar of water set on the side table and wiped his hands on an old rag. Taken her away? Even the way he spoke about Sarah, it was as if everyone was out to get him. Everything was an accusation.

“We went on a field trip.” Kirsten straightened her skirt and tried to avoid his gaze. “I thought Sarah needed some outside stimulation.”

“Oh?” Jamie questioned.

Tyler scoffed as he moved to pour himself a drink at the bar. “Leave the poor woman alone, James. I’m sure she knows what she’s doing.”

“Well, that’s yet to be proven, don’t you think?” Jamie glared at Tyler.

“She loves writing stories,” Kirsten interjected, glancing at them both in turn. “I simply wanted to provide a little inspiration. Sarah needs to get out more, socialize and explore in order to engage her imagination.”

Jamie smirked, but Kirsten couldn’t decide whether or not it was positive, even when he spoke, “You think her family doesn’t give her enough?”

Kirsten watched him closely, wondering if it was a defensive mechanism or a test to see whose side she was on. But there was only one side to be taken here, and it wasn’t that of any man.

She steadied her gaze on him. “No, I don’t. Children need more than just their family to give them a balanced outlook on life.”

Jamie dropped his stare in defeat and continued to pack up his brushes. The light was fading over the hills and he had lost the best part of the day for painting. One all, Kirsten thought as she crossed her arms and turned back to Tyler. He stood behind the bar, a smarmy grin plastered on his shadowed face, as if he were silently cheering for Kirsten.

“You really think she can write?” he asked as he poured a double nip of scotch into a crystal tumbler.

“Well she’s only seven, but I can tell she loves it. She just needs things to write about. You know, to get her juices going.”

Tyler raised one eyebrow. “Juices?”

Kirsten laughed and whatever tension was in the air dissipated. “Don’t be rude. This is your niece we’re talking about.”

Jamie mumbled something under his breath, but Kirsten couldn’t quite make out what it was. His back was turned and it was obviously not meant for their ears so she didn’t bother asking him to clarify.

As Kirsten expected, Beth requested a word with her after dinner was over. Instinctively she knew she was in for a tow over the hot coals. Beth was silent as they climbed to her office and she closed the door behind them.

“Sarah tells me you visited the school today.” She sat on the edge of the desk and looked down at Kirsten.

“Yes,” Kirsten replied in her sweetest tone. “Did you know there was a school in the area?” She already knew the answer to the question, but hoped her plea of innocence would work to her advantage.

“Yes, I knew there was a school here. We simply chose to school Sarah ourselves. I would hope that in future you will check with me before you decide to take Sarah anywhere.”

“Before I take her anywhere?”

Beth seemed unsure whether Kirsten was questioning what she had heard or was standing up to her. Before she could say anything Kirsten continued.

“I don’t mean to be disrespectful, Beth, but I do think I know what I’m doing when it comes to caring for children.”

Beth frowned. “I’m not disputing that, my dear. But ultimately we make the decisions for Sarah, not you.”

“Nothing that happened today was about making decisions for Sarah,” Kirsten scoffed. “We simply stopped in to see what the school was like. Sarah was extremely keen to interact with the other children.”

“So you don’t think Sarah should be going to a school instead of distance learning?”

Beth raised her eyebrow, looking rather like Tyler as she did so.

“I’m not saying that.” Kirsten clenched her hands together in her lap. “You probably already know that’s not what I think, and that’s why you have jumped to the defensive on the subject. I think Sarah should be at a school with other children her own age. She should be open to all the possibilities, all the stimulations she can get at her age. But that’s not my decision. She’s not my child. I work for you, and I will respect your decisions when it comes to Sarah.”

“Well, good.” Beth seemed puzzled.

“Alright then.” Kirsten stood up. She didn’t want to give Beth a chance to realise what had just happened. Right now she had the upper hand and she wanted to leave on that note.

“Kirsty-,”

Kirsten turned as the older woman spoke. “Oh, can I just say one thing? I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, but Sarah is not Brook. I may be way out of line in saying so, but I think Sarah needs to learn to breathe without being mollycoddled by her family. She’s not going to disappear if you give her some room to experience life for herself. But when she gets old enough to realise there’s a whole world out there that she’s been kept from, you will lose her.”

Beth simply stared, open mouthed at Kirsty, as if she had been slapped in the face. Kirsty disappeared quickly, deciding it was probably a good idea if she laid low for a few hours. She thought if she even so much as stuck her head out the door it may be chopped from her neck.

She blamed her red hair more than anything else. It always managed to get her into so much trouble. Why couldn’t she learn to keep her mouth shut? So far she had managed to alienate Jamie, even though she couldn’t put her finger on what may have caused that, and now she had more than likely upset the matriarch of the family. That was called biting the hand that feeds, she remembered her father saying once. God, what she wouldn’t do to see her father’s friendly smile right now. He would know just what to say to make her feel better. But she wasn’t about to go running to him right now. She needed to act like the adult she was and just keep it together. She could handle this.

What she needed was something to take her mind off the job. Dragging her bathing suit from the wardrobe, she exchanged it for her clothes, feeling sure that a hot soak would be just the thing to ease her mind. Tomorrow she may not have a job, so why not make the most of her time here before Beth sent her packing?

She took the lift to the bottom floor, which brought her down into the back passage and to a shortcut out through the laundry door. She walked down the damp concrete path, maiden hair ferns rustling against her bare legs as she passed. The sweet scent of Jasmine wafted on the night air as she neared the pool, its thick crawling growth providing shelter as Kirsty slipped behind the fence. With some difficulty she pulled back the cover of the pool, and dropped it onto the paving beneath. Thick steam rose in contrasting shards of warm against the cool black sky. Kirsten stepped down into the heat. The smell of chlorine assaulted her nostrils as she dipped into the water. She leaned over and found the button to start the bubbles. The gurgling water surged around

her, and she lay back against the vinyl headrest, her eyes skimming the expanse of brilliant stars that seemed endless. The sky here was clearer, the air cleaner with no city smog to coat the atmosphere. Kirsten had never seen a night sky like it. After a few moments she felt the tension melting from her body, and she relaxed completely, letting the stress wash away.

“You’d look better with a glass of mulled wine in your hand.”

She opened her eyes to see Tyler staring down at her, a playful grin at the corners of his mouth.

“Definitely not.” She smirked as she watched him throw his towel onto the tiles and climb into the pool opposite her. “I had a bad experience with red wine once and I don’t touch the stuff now.”

“Sounds interesting.” Tyler dipped both hands in the water and then ran them through his hair, pushing it back against his head. Then he leaned back and extended both arms out along the edge of the pool. His body glistened, water dripped from his muscular upper arms as he watched her trying not to look at him. His thick eyebrows and black hair framed a well defined face with high cheek bones and an angular jaw. Kirsten wasn’t sure if it was his good looks, or the way he seemed to be her only ally here right now, but she felt drawn to him. She dropped her gaze and trailed her hands through the water.

“Not really.” she smiled to herself as she remembered the night in question. It seemed like such a long time ago now.

“Are you okay?” Tyler seemed concerned and in tune with her unrest. She gave him a wary smile. “Yes. It’s been a long week. I think I’ve already managed to upset your mother, and Jamie-,” she paused. “I don’t know what’s up with Jamie. Is he always like this?”

“Jamie’s toys are still out of the cot because of you I think. But you shouldn’t take it personally. It doesn’t take much to upset our James.”

“You don’t help.” Kirsten pouted in Tyler’s direction. “You like to goad him, I’ve noticed.”

“Hey, if it’s one thing you’ll learn about me from the start, it’s that I tell it straight. And I’m a pretty good read on other people. For instance,” he narrowed his gaze at her,

“I can tell right now that you’re just dying for me to give you a shoulder rub.”

Kirsten felt the heat rush to her cheeks. It had been the furthest thing from her mind. She stared wide eyed back at him. “Whatever would make you think that?”

“Well, you just indicated you’ve had a hard week. I know only too well how people can get riled up when dealing with my mother. Wouldn’t a nice neck rub be great right about now?”

Kirsty couldn’t help but smile. She had to admit it sounded wonderful, but did she really want to let Tyler lay his hands on her? His reputation with women already seemed crystal clear. But then again, why would she think he could be interested in the likes of her?

“I don’t think that would be appropriate do you?” she asked. “After all, you’re almost my employer.”

Tyler laughed, letting his head fall back against the side of the pool. “I think you know as well as I do who holds the purse strings around here. I do as I’m told just as much as you do. Come on, I won’t bite.”

Kirsten crumbled. It was easy to sway to someone who showed a friendly face among adversity. She so wanted to feel liked by at least one of the adults around here. She

knew she had Sarah’s vote, but to have Tyler in her corner would also be a huge bonus. It was a risk she was willing to take.

She slid around the bench and pushed her back closer to Tyler as he took hold of her shoulders. His fingers were soft and warm against her skin and she leaned her head forward, dropping her chin onto her chest. His hands moved rhythmically over her neck and upper back, his thumbs digging in to smooth away the tension they found there.

“God, do you do this for a living?” Kirsten murmured as she closed her eyes.

“No, I’m just very practiced.” She felt his breath on the back of her neck as he spoke and it made her shiver. He was so close she could feel his hip against her own as she slid back against him under the water.

“You have great skin,” Tyler teased. “It’s very soft.”

Kirsty giggled. “Yeah, right. I guess in this light you can’t see the freckles.”

She felt his body shake with laughter. “Hey, freckles are very cute.”

“Yeah, right,” Kirsty said sarcastically. “And I suppose the red hair is too?”

“Ain’t nothin’ wrong with a feisty redhead.”

Kirsty laughed. “Well, it doesn’t seem to be doing me any favours here so far.”

“I don’t know about that,” Tyler murmured as he bent his head and let his lips graze the back of her shoulder.

Kirsty gasped and straightened her back in shock. She turned to move away, but as she dropped her legs to the bottom of the pool Tyler grabbed them with one hand and pulled them across his lap, forcing her into his arms. Putting her off balance she instinctively grabbed his neck and held onto him. His eyes twinkled as he dropped his head and moved his mouth over hers. She moaned in surprise; let his tongue push between her lips in anticipation. He kissed her hungrily for a few moments before she dropped her hand to his chest and pushed herself away from him. She stared wildly up into his face.

“This is not a good idea,” she said breathlessly.

“Why not?” Tyler asked, his eyes daring her to come back for a second attempt at seduction.

“Because, it’s not.” Kirsten dragged her legs from Tyler’s grasp. “It’s completely unprofessional.”

Tyler leveled her with a bold stare. “That never stopped you in the past.”

Kirsten was shocked. “What did you say?”

“I said it doesn’t seem to have put you off with past employers.”

Kirsten stood up. “You bastard!” Before she could stop herself she slapped Tyler across the cheek. It wasn’t hard, but a nice red mark appeared on his face and he put his own hand up to cover it.

Kirsten was stunned. How did Tyler know about Greg Hamilton? And moreover why did he think bringing it up would only encourage her to take something up with him?

What kind of sick game was he playing?

“Jesus, I can’t believe you people.” She scrambled to the side of the pool, a sick feeling creeping into the pit of her stomach.

“Kirsty, wait.” Tyler grabbed at her wrist, tried to pull her back. But she already had one leg out of the pool. With the other leg she pushed down against the molded plastic seat, but before she could do anything her foot slipped out from under her. Her weight collapsed onto the coloured concrete tiles and her hip burned with pain as she landed. She yelped and rolled onto her back, closing her eyes as a bright light blocked her sight. Tyler leapt from the pool and was at her side before she knew it.

“Are you okay?” He took her by the shoulders and tried to lift her, but she shook him off.

“I’m fine.” Tears filled her eyes and she sobbed.

“You’re not fine, let me help you up.” He lifted her with his strong hands, despite her protest.

“Get off me.” Kirsty was now sitting and she swatted his hands away. Her chest heaved in blind anger. She wanted him to stop touching her. She was so wild at him. Tyler laughed, enraging her further. He held her firmly with his large hands. Then he spoke in a sharp tone, “Kirsten, stop. You’re hurt.” He brushed a loose strand of hair away from her face and peered into her green eyes. “I’m sorry.” His look seemed genuinely remorseful and Kirsten calmed a smidgen. “I’m sorry, okay? That was uncalled for.”

She regarded him with speculation. “Damn straight it was.” Tears escaped from the corners of her eyes, flowing out of control. The flood gates had opened and she didn’t know how to close them. “I needed you to be a friend.”

“I’m sorry. I am, seriously. I am a friend, please.” He pulled Kirsten to her feet and she held his shoulder for balance.

She looked up at him. “How the hell did you know about that?”

“Hey, my job was to check you out. You don’t think my mother would have hired you without knowing anything about you, do you?”

Kirsten shrugged. “So you went snooping into my past?”

“Hey, when I do a job, I do it properly.”

“What else do you know about it?”

“Hey, you can’t blame me for something you did. I just happened to find out about it. You didn’t cover your tracks very well. Besides, most of what I found out was assumption on my part. You just confirmed it.”

“God, you’re infuriating,” Kirsten sighed.

“I know.” Tyler grinned.

Kirsten thumped him on the arm. “Don’t try that bloody Mister Sweetness on me.”

“Hey, I’m sorry. It was just the moment. You looked so good under the moonlight. It won’t happen again okay?”

“Promise?”

“Scouts honour.” Tyler held two fingers against his forehead. Kirsten laughed. “You weren’t even a boy scout were you?”

Tyler shook his head. “Nope. Come on let’s get you inside.”

Kirsten let Tyler carry her into the house. Then he made good on his promise, by seeing her safely to her bedroom and bidding her goodnight. She dried herself off then fell into the pillows, feeling mentally and physically exhausted. The hot water and cool night air had worked their magic. Even after her fight with Tyler she felt spent and ready for sleep.

Tomorrow was her day off. She planned to make the most of it. Sleeping late was first on the agenda. That way she could avoid contact with everyone for as long as possible. She felt it was what she needed to do if she were to retain her sanity in this alien territory.

Chapter 6

By lunch time the next day the sky had filled with low level grey cloud. The temperature was still in the late twenties though, and despite the heat Kirsten slept well into the morning. Ditching all bedtime attire she had taken to sleeping naked with just a sheet covering her, and was getting used to the absent comfort the heavy blankets provided.

She climbed out of bed and put on her blue satin robe, tying it securely round the waist before opening the door to her balcony. She could hear voices below, and she looked down to see Sarah and Jamie in the pool. She felt rather like a voyeur as she watched them, undetected from her third floor perch.

Jamie wore a pair of red board shorts, his long lean frame submerged from the waist down in the clear water. Sarah amused herself by climbing up his back, her skinny limbs flailing as he dipped into the water and let her settle on his gleaming shoulders. She squealed as he burst out of the water, raising her high in the air with a noisy whoosh. He grabbed her hands and let her scramble to her feet atop his back. Her knees shook but he held her fast, helping her balance as she bent over his head. Then he leaned forward and tossed her into the water. Her arms waved around as she screamed with delight, toppling into the water with a huge splash. She came up spluttering and laughing, and Jamie plucked her effortlessly into his arms once more. Kirsten smiled. They were such a delight to watch. She daren’t be spotted in case the magic spell was broken and Jamie reverted to the monster he became in adult company. So she retreated back inside and showered, putting on a green summer dress with spaghetti straps. Then she padded downstairs barefoot, expecting to find Craig. But the house was deserted. Tyler’s car was gone from the driveway, but Kirsten knew he had been due to return to town anyway so that was no surprise. Beth’s car was also missing, and seemingly so was Craig. She found a note on the fridge, held high with a large plastic magnet:

Gone to town with Craig, back tomorrow.

Beth

So it really was just her, Jamie and Sarah in the house. Inwardly she breathed a sigh of relief. She could relax. Jamie and Sarah were obviously intent on just hanging out together, which left her to enjoy her first day off in peace. She made herself a hot drink then pattered through to the television room. The heavy curtains were drawn, making the room dark. She left them closed, instead turning on a light to see the huge selection of movies against the back wall. She picked an old favourite, put it in the DVD player and switched the lights off again before settling back on the over-stuffed chaise lounger.

Later, when she was sure the others had vacated the pool and were nowhere to be seen or heard, she crept outside. She walked barefoot across the lawn, the soft grass sponging between her toes. Large water marks on the rock tiles, which had been concreted in place around the pool, let off the sweet smell of evaporation in the heat. Kirsten crept into the pool house. It was stifling hot and she opened a window on the north side to let some fresh air in. Guilt crept over her as she lifted the loose boards on

the custom built bench. The diary had been calling her name. She had resisted returning to it all week, but eventually the thoughts of being able to learn more about the people that surrounded Brook, who were now also a part of Kirsten’s life, got the better of her. Maybe she could get some insight into how these people ticked if she read what Brook knew of them.

She plucked the old book from its hiding place and settled back to read. Brook’s tale started of course, in January, when Sarah was just over a year old. She seemed to have a settled life, although she continued regular sessions with a therapist:

January 1st

Margaret thinks I need to continue this diary, so I will write my thoughts still, if even just to keep her happy! Last night was wonderful. We had a huge bonfire down on the beach. My mother is so happy here. She just loves having everyone around, especially Sarah. My darling little girl is now a year old, how fast that has flown by . . .

January 2nd

Jamie and I went riding, down to the Chamberlain cabin, his favourite place. He wants to know what I talk about with Margaret. He thinks it’s still all about my father. Okay, so my father molested me. God, how long does it take to get over that? I still have nightmares sometimes . . .

January 10th

Sigh. Jamie has gone back to work. I hate it when he goes away. I used to go with him, all the time, but with Sarah sometimes it’s just easier to stay here . . .

Kirsten started to form a clear picture of Brook in her head. She had been troubled, obviously, by the past she had endured with her father. It explained why Beth had brought her children half way around the world, to a place that offered nothing but comfort and a sense of security in its obscurity.

Brook’s contentment had a melancholy undertone. Kirsten sighed. Her own shame was nothing compared to what Brook had endured in her past. Certainly Kirsten hadn’t required a councilor when she had left her last job. She had slept with a married man under bizarre circumstances, which was nothing compared to Brook, left scarred by abuse. She felt thankful that Beth, at least, had taken her children away from such an environment. So many women would not admit it of their own husbands, and often stayed, long after the damage had been done.

She put the book back in its dinghy hiding place, replacing the boards carefully so it would go undetected once more, then walked back up to the house. Jamie and Sarah sat in the kitchen, eating sandwiches. The sharp smell of peanut butter filled the air as Kirsten entered. A butter knife covered with a thick later of chunky peanuts on the bread board, its gelatinous remains stuck in thick blobs to the smooth surface, indicated that Sarah had been allowed to make her own sandwich.

“Hi, Kirsty,” Sarah attempted through a mouthful of bread.

“Hi there.” Kirsty smiled as she crossed to the bench and pulled the electric jug from its cradle.

“Sarah, don’t talk with your mouth full,” Jamie scolded.

“Sorry.”

Kirsty filled the jug and put it on to boil. Jamie looked up, seeming almost shy for a moment as their eyes met.

“I thought I’d take Sarah out for a meal tonight.” He looked back at Sarah.

“Oh yay, Dad, where?” Sarah jiggled excitedly in her chair, making it rock noisily on the linoleum.

“Just down to the hotel.” Jamie smiled at his daughter.

“Can Kirsty come?”

“Yes, Kirsten can come if she wants to.” He raised his gaze to hers once more.

“Would you like to join us?”

Kirsten gave him a guarded smile. He never ceased to amaze her. Did he put on this multitude of personalities to confuse her intentionally?

“Oh, no, I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

“You wouldn’t be intruding,” Jamie said flatly.

“Please come,” Sarah begged.

“I’m sure you’ll enjoy having your dad all to yourself,” Kirsten replied.

“Well, I am away tomorrow again, so how bout it kiddo, just you and me?”

“Okay,” Sarah replied with a somber nod of the head. “Next time will you come with us?”

“Next time? Sure, why not.”

* * * *

When they had left Kirsty changed into her swimsuit and ventured down to the pool. The clouds began to thicken overhead, forming low grey thunderheads above her, amplifying the heat. The sea was a deep emerald green and lay eerily still. It was a fantastic time to swim. The disappearing sun cast a red shadow on the underside of the angry sky.

Kirsten looked down at her upper thigh, where a purple bruise had formed from her fall the previous evening. She poked it but it didn’t hurt anymore. They built them tough where she came from. She smiled at the thought of her family back home. What would they be doing right now? If the weather was good they would probably be starting a barbeque. Her father would have donned his apron and would be beer in hand, cooking steak and chicken kebabs.

Shelley had probably been to the beach with Stephen, like she did most weekends in the summer, probably tired from playing volleyball. She was the middle child, fussy and independent, the one who got the good looks and mum’s blond hair. She was never happy with her lot though. She still lived at home, despite the fact that she had been in the same job for three years now and probably earned more than her father had at that age, while he was married with a child on the way.

Alicia would be studying hard no doubt. She had exams coming up for her last year of High School, and at eighteen she knew exactly what she wanted in life. Getting a full time job out of school was not on her agenda, she wanted to go to University to study veterinary science. Like Kirsten, she had inherited their father’s ruby complexion, the red hair which got them in so much trouble and an ambition to do and say exactly what was on her mind. Kirsten constantly had to bite her tongue to stop her brain going into gear. Alicia unfortunately, had not learned that restraint yet. The three girls had their differences when it came to interests. It must have driven her parents crazy when they all wanted to do different things. Early on Kirsty had a passion

for ballet, but when she realised her hips were not designed to look good in a tutu she soon turned to swimming, then netball and hockey.

Shelley was the musical one in the family. She started with the recorder in primary school, driving everyone crazy with her shrill practices. Then she had learned the guitar and the drums. Finally when Kirsten’s parents had refused to buy the drum kit she dreamed of, Shelley had turned to kayaking and volley ball. Alicia’s passion had always been horse riding, and although they had neither the room, nor the money to buy her a horse, she always found ways to do it. Clubs, friends and a part time job when she was fourteen at the stables, had ensured she could always keep that contact. She loved animals, hence the reason for wanting to become a vet.

After swimming several lengths of the short pool Kirsten dried off and returned to the house. She plucked a book from the shelf on the landing, something easy to read by Marian Keyes and retired to her bedroom for the evening. She lay on the bed, wearing just a thin pair of boxer shorts and a camisole. It had been a relaxing day and the stress from the previous week had melted away entirely. She soon drifted off on top of the bed, book in hand, windows open to the soft westerly breeze. It was the thunder and lightning that woke her about three hours later. First the lightning strike, which cut clear across the dark sky, making Kirsten blink and wonder what had happened. As she stretched and yawned, the thunder clapped its hand across the sky, with an echoing boom so close to the house it made Kirsten jump. The sound reverberated as she sat up and her heart skipped in her chest. She pulled on her robe and snuck out into the hall. She no longer wanted to be on the third floor. She climbed down to the second floor, wondering briefly what time it was. She had no idea how long she had been asleep and she hadn’t heard the others come home. She opened Sarah’s door. It was dark, but she could hear the soft sound of her breathing coming from the bed.

“You okay, Sarah?” she asked in a whisper.

There was no answer, but the steady rhythmic breathing continued. Kirsty pulled the door shut then carried on to the ground floor. Another strike of lightning illuminated the hallway as she wound her way down to the lounge. The thunder followed closely behind, this time a little more muted from her position in the bowels of the house. The thunder rolled away to silence, and as she neared the lounge another sound took its place. It was a steady ivory melody, rolling with passion from tender, talented hands. The darkness seemed to amplify the sound, a slow mournful tune which built to a classical crescendo, then dropped away to a sweet, soulful tease of music. Kirsten remembered Beth’s words and realised it must be Jamie at the piano. Silently she crept barefoot to the lounge entrance and leaned against the doorframe to watch him. His head was bowed over the keys and his body swayed in time to his playing. He seemed so engrossed in his music that he didn’t see her; his eyes closed intermittently as he was swept away by his own song.

A bolt of lightning that lit up the sky in increments of silver before it died away, made Kirsten jump again.

Jamie looked up and saw her, but continued to play. He seemed completely unfazed by the electrical storm, even when a great clap of thunder shook the walls.

“It won’t hurt you,” he said softly over the music.

Kirsten puzzled over the statement. Was he talking about the weather, or himself?

“How do you know?”

Jamie stopped playing, placed both hands on his thighs and regarded her with sympathy. Then he shifted his gaze to the windows. The only light in the room was the glow that came from two candles burning atop the old grand piano.

“Because it’s sheet lightning. It’s in the clouds. It’s not coming to earth.”

“Oh,” Kirsten blushed, once again showing her ignorance. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb your playing.” She turned to leave.

“It’s okay, stay.” He stood up and took his glass from the side table. Kirsten could see a small amount of brown liquid in the bottom, which he quickly emptied. “Would you like a drink?”

Kirsten stepped further into the room. “I’m not much of a drinker. What are you having?”

Jamie moved forward and swirled his now empty glass under her nose. A strong liquor smell filled her nostrils and she screwed up her nose. Jamie’s laughter rose above the sound of the thunder. “Brandy.”

“I don’t think so.” Kirsten smiled.

“How ‘bout something a little softer for the lady?” Without waiting for an answer he turned to the bar and poured her a double nip of Baileys over ice. He swaggered back to where she stood by the window, watching for the next bolt of lightning. It was the most relaxed Kirsten had seen him yet; his shoulders had dropped their defensive pose for a more subdued demeanor. He too, was obviously completely happy being here without Beth or Tyler.

“Thank you,” she accepted the crystal tumbler he handed her and sipped on the brown liquid, feeling its warmth slide down her throat.

Jamie returned to the piano and sat down. “Do you play?”

Kirsten shook her curls as the sky behind her lit up the room once more. Jamie’s face became clear for a split second. He was very handsome when he dropped the selfindulgent scowl; his skin was clear and his eyes bright. Small dimples formed at the edges of his mouth when he smiled.

“My sister is the musical one in the family,” Kirsten projected above the thunder.

“You have sisters?” He seemed genuinely surprised, like she must have come from under a rock, not from a normal family with siblings and human parents.

“Two younger sisters,” Kirsty confirmed.

“Are they like you?” Jamie looked down at the piano keys so Kirsten could not tell if he was being facetious or genuinely interested. The timbre of his voice gave nothing away.

“Are they like me?” she questioned, hoping he would clarify what he meant. He looked up and smiled. “You have this habit of repeating questions.”

Her defenses kicked into low gear. “Why don’t you like me?”

“Who said I don’t like you?”

Kirsten shuffled to the edge of the piano and leaned over it. “You certainly don’t act as though you do.”

Jamie met her with a leveling stare. “How do you know what I act like? You’ve only known me, what, a week? Besides, why is it so important that I like you?”

“It’s not I guess. I just thought for Sarah’s sake we could at least be friendly to one another.” She turned to walk away. She could feel her anger boiling up inside her, and the last thing she wanted was another confrontation like she’d had with Tyler.

“Wait, Kirsty.”

She turned and eyed him with speculation, waited for him to continue.

“I’m a prick, you’ll get used to it. I just don’t know whose side you’re on yet. I have no idea what goes on in Beth and Tyler’s mind. For all I know you’re here to use for ammunition against me.”

“Whose side I’m on?” Kirsten frowned. “Ammunition? Jesus, you people are just one big happy family aren’t you? For what it’s worth, whether you want to believe me or not, I don’t want anything to do with whatever games you play between yourselves. I’m here to do a job, and that job is to look after your daughter. So if you want to talk sides, then I’m on hers.” She groaned. There she was, doing it again. Her mouth had just gone into full gear before her brain could put the brakes on. Jamie smiled; a smarmy little grin which made Kirsten wonder if he was laughing at her or in appreciation for her.

“Look, I can’t expect you to understand half of what goes on here, but maybe if you stick around long enough you’ll find out why I don’t trust certain people.”

“Well, I intend on sticking around for Sarah’s sake.” Kirsten crossed her arms and stood her ground. As if to back her up a flash of lightning illuminated the floor. The storm was moving away now, drifting down the bay further. Jamie watched it go, as if it were a friend leaving for the last time. Kirsten felt sorry for him then. The look in his eyes seemed so pained. If he was so unhappy here then why didn’t he take Sarah and go? Beth had already intimated he had parents in Nelson who would surely help him out with Sarah. “Why do you stay here Jamie?”

His eyes cleared and he looked back at her. “For reasons you wouldn’t understand.”

She shrugged. “Maybe one day you’ll understand I’m not the enemy. Until then I guess I’m guilty until proven otherwise.” She left him then, sitting in the dark watching her go. She was so over it. Jamie’s wall was not coming down any time soon. The armour was on and the stage for battle set. At least now she knew where she stood with him.

Chapter 7

“Sarah, I love your story.” Kirsten held the page up in the light of the window and smiled. It was the best work Sarah had done all week. She looked down to see the little girl grinning up at her.

“Do you like it?” She blinked her big eyes in surprise.

“You know what? I like it so much I think this one should be seen by everyone. Come on.” Kirsten headed to the door.

Sarah almost knocked her chair backward as she stood up. She had been itching to go downstairs since she had heard Tyler arrive home from town, but now her interest lay in what Kirsten intended on doing with her carefully crafted tale.

“Where are you going to put it?”

“I think we’ll put this one on the fridge.”

“No, Kirsty, please don’t.”

Kirsten was surprised by the protest. She knelt beside Sarah and took her by the arm.

“Why not, Sarah? This is good work. Don’t you want everyone to read it?”

“Gran might get mad.” Her forehead creased into thin lines. Kirsty smiled. “No she won’t, honey. I promise.”

They wandered downstairs and Kirsten looked at the lined refill page once more. Sarah had decorated the edges with a thick brown frame, and at the bottom had drawn a colourful picture of children riding horses under a sun filled sky. The story crafted above was a tale of Sarah’s friend Misty, whom she had met at the school. Misty lived on a farm with her own horses and had subsequently told Sarah she must come to ride with her sometime. Sarah’s imagination had gone into overdrive and the story had tumbled out.

They found Craig in the kitchen, ferociously peeling carrots.

“Hey, bunny, whatcha got there?” He smiled down at Sarah.

“Go on, Sarah. Show him,” Kirsten prompted. She handed Sarah the piece of paper.

“It’s a story.”

“A story?”

“Ah-huh.” She nodded. “Kirsty said to put it on the fridge.” She wrinkled her nose as if it was the silliest idea she had heard and was expecting confirmation of the same from Craig.

“What a good idea.” Craig smiled at Kirsty. “Then we can all read it.”

Again Sarah looked stunned, as if all the adults had lost their mind at the same time.

“Really?”

“Yep, you grab some of those magnets and go right ahead.”

Kirsty helped Sarah by pulling some magnets from the top of the fridge then let her attach the story where she wanted. To her delight it was placed front and centre, where it couldn’t be missed.

Kirsten heard an unfamiliar peel of laughter from the patio, and she turned to the window. The laughter belonged to a long legged woman with short dark hair. She wore a simple white tank top and a red skirt, which barely seemed to cover what she’d had for breakfast.

“Uncle Ty.” Sarah skipped out to join them on the front lawn.

“Who’s that?” A tiny part of Kirsten panged in jealousy. The woman was gorgeous.

“That’s Leigh.” Craig smiled. “She works for Tyler.”

“Oh, just works for him?” She watched them together through the window. Leigh’s body language seemed to indicate they were more than friends.

“She could come and work for me any day,” Craig said enthusiastically. Kirsten laughed. “I’m sure she could.”

“She’s nice enough, but typical of the women Tyler has hanging from his arm, she doesn’t have much between the ears.”

“I wouldn’t think he had a type.” Kirsten thought back to the other night, when he had kissed her in the hot tub. She was a far cry from this Leigh whom he’d brought home for the weekend.

“Ah, I think you have him figured out already.” Craig winked as he popped the end of a carrot into his mouth and crunched it between his teeth.

“Well, he’s not a hard make,” Kirsten conceded. “Jamie on the other hand is a mystery. I haven’t figured that one out yet.”

“Don’t be too disconcerted about that one. I don’t think Jamie quite knows who he is these days either.”

“Oh, I’m not convinced on that score. He knows a lot more than he lets on.”

“You think so?” Craig wiped his hands on a small white towel then balled it up and tossed it into the laundry basket at the far end of the room.

“Yep, I do. I also think he’s a lion playing tame, just waiting for someone to put their head in his mouth. And I’m not going to be that person.” She smiled. “I’ve already felt the claws. That’s enough for me.”

She left Craig to prepare dinner and returned upstairs to change. With it being the height of summer, Sarah’s little classroom was stuffy during the day, so Kirsten dressed lightly, usually in shorts and a loose t-shirt. When dinner was a formal occasion, which Beth insisted on when everyone was present, she always changed her attire before attending.

When she came back downstairs Tyler and his lady friend were by the pool. Sarah had stripped off her clothes and was in the water, wearing only her knickers, while Leigh sat on the side, her legs swinging in the water as she held a flute of champagne.

“Evening, Kirsty.” Beth appeared from the kitchen. She had just showered, her hair was still damp and she wafted under a layer of sweet fragrances. They had not spoken in great length since Kirsten had expressed her opinions about Sarah being locked up like Repunzel in a brick tower.

“Hello, Beth. How has your week been?”

“Oh busy, honey. You’d think at my age I’d be able to retire, but I got plenty to do.”

She helped herself to a glass of bubbly from the bottle Tyler had opened. “I see Sarah has been busy.”

Kirsty gazed expectantly at her boss. She truly thought when Beth saw the story she would be upset, but if she was it didn’t show in her tone or stature.

“Did you like it?”

Beth gave a wary smile. “Honey, if that kid spat blood on a piece of paper and twirled it round with a brush it would be good enough for me. But I don’t think that’s what you’re asking, is it?”

“Well, Sarah thought you’d be mad if we put it up on the fridge for you to see.”

“That girl doesn’t miss a thing does she?” Beth walked to the French doors and stood next to Kirsten. “Look, I know I was upset the other night about her going to school. But I’ve had time to think about it and you’re absolutely right about what you said. I

lost my daughter, and to treat Sarah like she’s going to disappear the same way is unfair.”

Kirsten glanced sideways at her boss. “What are you saying?”

“Well I’m not sure yet.” Beth sipped her wine, leaving a lip shaped pink stain on the glass. “But after seeing that story it’s made me realise I need to think real hard about some things.”

“Are you saying she’ll be allowed to go to school?”

“I’d be foolish to say no wouldn’t I?” Beth glanced at Kirsten and continued before a response was forthcoming. “Now, I’m not saying that’s a straight out yes. I just think we can certainly talk about some options. I’m open to a compromise.” She grinned.

“I’m not ready to let go of the apron strings completely yet.”

“That’s great,” Kirsten beamed. She looked down the hill as Sarah climbed out of the water. Leigh was busy trying to splash Tyler, who was on the opposite side of the pool. Finally a spray of water connected with his legs, and before Leigh could get up from her position Tyler ran round the outside and pushed her into the water. Leigh screamed before she disappeared, and then came up spluttering, her fine coiffure of hair now plastered against her head in lank strands.

“God, I don’t know why he bothers with that woman,” Beth commented under her breath.

“You don’t like her?”

“Oh she’s nice enough,” Beth dismissed. “But she’ll never get him to marry her.”

“Craig said they’re just friends.”

“Dear Craig,” Beth said with a fond smile. “Any woman who knows anything about anything could see she wants more than friendship from him.”

“Well, I did wonder.”

“Oh yes. She’d have him in a heartbeat. But he’s looking for the right one. Until then he’ll go through as many as it takes to keep his mind off it.”

“Whatever do you mean by that?”

“You know how people say women marry their fathers?”

Kirsten nodded.

“Well, for Tyler it’s his sister. He’s looking for someone just like Brook.”

It was the first time Kirsten had heard Beth speak of Brook when it didn’t have something to do with Sarah.

“That’s understandable I guess. They must have been very close.”

“Sometimes I think there really wasn’t a two year gap between them. It was as if they came from the same egg. He was like her shadow.” She smiled. “That’s part of the reason why I sent Brook to boarding school when we came to New Zealand. And I think that’s why he and Jamie don’t get on,” she paused and sighed. “Sometimes the bond of siblings can be stronger than that of a man and his wife.”

Kirsten pondered Beth’s last statement. It would explain why Jamie and Tyler hated each other. Tyler must resent Jamie for taking Brook away from him, and Jamie possibly felt Tyler had been too close to Brook, even after they were married. In which case neither of them was to blame; it was simply a rather unfortunate scenario. However it didn’t explain Jamie’s ongoing bitterness toward his in-laws. Something else lurked beneath the surface there.

* * * *

Dinner was an interesting event to say the least. Kirsten sat at the end of the table with Sarah, a quiet observer of the way Leigh and Tyler interacted. Leigh was like a teenager with a crush, obviously threatened by Kirsten’s presence in the household.

“You’re a lot younger than the last nanny, Kirsty,” she said snidely. Much to Kirsten’s surprise it was Beth who jumped to her defense. “She’s doing wonderful things with Sarah, Leigh. I’m so pleased Tyler talked me into hiring someone younger this time.”

Kirsten bit her lip to stop a smile, as the comment was plainly intended to upset Leigh further.

“Well, that’s good for Sarah isn’t it?” If looks cast daggers Kirsten would have been on the floor bleeding to death.

“I can’t take all the credit actually,” Kirsten said quietly. “Sarah is a wonderful student.” She smiled down at her ward. Sarah’s face turned a brilliant shade of pink as she stuffed a forkful of mashed potato into her mouth.

“She takes after me, don’t you sweetie?” Tyler winked at his niece.

“Don’t be silly,” Sarah said seriously. “You don’t have blonde hair.”

Everyone at the table erupted into laughter. Kirsten was amazed at how Sarah could light up the room with her naïve commentary.

* * * *

After dinner Kirsten excused herself. It was obvious Leigh was uncomfortable with her around, and she didn’t feel comfortable always socialising with the family, given that she was the hired help. She knew they didn’t feel that way about her, but keeping a professional distance was something she had decided she should do as much as possible.

When the sun had disappeared behind the hills Kirsten snuck down to the pool and slipped into the clear water. Solar lights, placed around the edge of the lawn, provided a dim glow. For Kirsten there was nothing more glorious than lying back watching the night sky, her hair flowing generously around her shoulders, suspended in the cool, lapping water. She could forget everything for a while; it was like her own magical world where only she and the soothing water existed. She had thought about going down to the jetty and wading out into the tide, but visions of the opening scene of the Jaws movie prevented her from doing so at night. She hadn’t quite built up the courage for that yet. If she had someone to swim with she may have attempted it, but alone it wouldn’t be as soothing as lying back in a pool, where she knew one hundred percent she was safe. She was a strong swimmer, but even that did nothing for her confidence when she thought about a great white bearing down on her at twenty feet. Beaming headlights that cut laser paths of light through the black air above her caught Kirsten’s attention and she swam to the edge of the pool to see who had arrived. It was Jamie. He pulled his body out of the blue hatchback, his long legs falling onto the path as if he was weary from his drive. He raked a hand through his sandy hair and reached into the back seat for his bag. Kirsten pushed herself from the side of the pool and continued to swim lazy backstroke lengths. Hearing the movement of the water, he dropped his bag on the concrete patio and wandered across the grass, steadying his weight backward against the steep slope until he reached the poolside.

“Hi.” She stopped swimming and let her legs drop to the bottom of the pool, treading the water slowly with her arms. She was surprised he had actually made the effort to come over.

“Hi, yourself.” Jamie smiled. “Are you all alone?”

Kirsten sniggered, resisting the urge to be sarcastic. Kid gloves remember? She reminded herself. Now would not be the time to try some good old irony. She finally had Jamie starting a normal conversation with a few pleasantries and she didn’t want to spoil it.

Jamie, realising the stupidity of his question, laughed. “Of course you’re alone. Where’s Sarah, I thought she would have jumped at the chance to go swimming at night?”

Kirsten smiled. “Your daughter was completely worn out and took herself to bed. I don’t think it hurt that I told her you’d be home when she woke up. If I’d known you were going to be home this early I would have let her stay up late.”

Jamie waved his hand in the air. “No, that’s okay. I’ll see her in the morning.” He crouched down and flicked his hand into the pool. “How’s the water?”

Kirsten watched him closely. Was he actually asking her a leading question? This was so unlike the Jamie she had come to be weary of. Or was this the real Jamie, and every other time had been his guise?

“Why don’t you come in and find out?” She grinned.

He lifted his head and met her gaze, a wide grin spread across his face. It made him seem younger and Kirsten was quite taken aback. All this time she had thought he was older than Tyler, but now, in this light, with him looking at her that way, she realised he was probably not much older than Brook would have been today. It made sense, for she had met Jamie while they were at school together.

“Maybe I will.” Jamie let his hand trail through the water. But a shrill laugh put a stop to the magic, drifting down on top of Tyler’s deep voice, before the two of them appeared from behind the house. Leigh tore down the hill, her breasts bouncing dangerously close to escaping the two triangles of cloth, which held her bikini top together.

“Oh, Jamie.” Leigh stopped in her tracks. “Hi.”

Jamie’s mouth drew up into a snarl, his lips pursed into thin, tense lines. “Leigh.”

Tyler arrived shortly after, wearing a pair of swimming shorts and carrying two towels.

Kirsten sighed. The Jamie she had been hoping to spend some time with had departed. But more than that, there seemed to be something in particular about Leigh that was making him uncomfortable; even more than usual.

“Hey man, I didn’t think you were getting back ‘til tomorrow.” Tyler observed him with a cool stare.

“Well I’m here.” Jamie smiled sarcastically at his brother in law. Tyler ignored the remark and turned to Kirsten. “How’s the hip Kirst? I was meaning to ask you before, but it slipped my mind.”

Kirsten blushed as Jamie swerved his gaze toward her, puzzled by the question. She gazed back at Tyler. It was as though he had chosen to ask her right this moment, in front of Jamie. She smiled, but could feel the heat rising in her cheeks.

“It’s fine, thanks. I had a nice bruise for a couple of days but that’s gone now.”

“What happened?” Leigh screwed up her pretty nose.

Kirsten opened her mouth to answer but Tyler interjected before she had a chance.

“She slipped while we were in the hot tub the other night. I had to carry her up to her room.”

“Oh, poor thing.” Leigh pouted, the implied innuendo going straight over her head. Jamie, however, took it just how Tyler had intended it. His eyes narrowed and he glared at his brother in law. Tyler ignored him and asked Kirsten instead, “How’s the water?”

“It’s great.” Kirsten glared at Tyler in disapproval. Jamie took a step backward as Leigh climbed down the ladder, into the shimmering water. Tyler moved to the end of the oval and dropping their towels on the grass, he dive-bombed into the pool. Without a word Jamie backed up a few more steps then turned and headed back to the house.

Kirsten scrambled to the ladder and climbed out of the pool. Taking her towel and running up the hill she sprang into the house after Jamie, catching him in the hallway.

“Jamie?” Her hair dripped on the carpet and she mopped at it with the towel she had wrapped around her neck.

“What?” He swung round as if annoyed by her approach. She stopped. “God, do you really have to talk to me like that?” Kirsten snapped back at him. “A moment ago we were having a civilized conversation.”

“Yeah, and a moment ago I didn’t know you and Tyler had gotten to know each other so intimately,” he spat back at her.

Kirsten laughed. “Come on. You know as well as I do, that was completely misconstrued, just to piss you off. I don’t know why, and I don’t care to know why, but just to set the record straight, there is nothing going on between me and Tyler.”

“Funny that,” Jamie mocked. “Leigh told me the same thing about two years ago.”

Kirsten was lost for words. She stared back at Jamie, her mouth open in surprise. Jamie laughed, looking pleased he was able to strike her speechless. Then he left her standing in the hallway, climbed the stairs and disappeared into the darkness of the second storey. She heard his door close and she turned back to the lounge to watch Tyler and Leigh from her position behind the curtains. Wow. That was a surprise. She never would have guessed there was history between Jamie and Leigh. She seemed completely intent on getting Tyler into her clutches. Just what had happened there? It was apparent Tyler didn’t want Leigh. The attraction was so one-sided it would be plain enough to anyone who observed them for any longer than five minutes. Jamie had insinuated Tyler was at fault, but Kirsten was confused. Why would Tyler lure a woman, whom he didn’t even want, away from Jamie?

The story was weaving into a spider web of intricate secrets, unwinding one by one for Kirsten to see. The problem was she was beginning to feel like the fly. Tonight Tyler had conveniently used her as bait to provoke Jamie. Somehow she had now been pulled into their little game of war. One way or another, she decided, she would have to find out what fueled their fire.

Chapter 8

Kirsten woke as the first fingers of dawn crept over the green hills in the east. Knowing it was Saturday she rolled over, pulled the sheet up over her head and tried to ignore her conscious state. But her mind had other ideas, and sleep would not return. She glanced at the red glowing numbers on the bedside cabinet. It was a little before six in the morning. She groaned, but hauled her frame out of the bed and padded to the window. A thin layer of mist covered the bay, below the line of the house, thinning to nothing as it reached the pool. It looked as though someone had crept in during the night and laid a thick blanket of cotton wool over the sea. Kirsten pulled on a tracksuit, socks and sneakers, then pushed her hair under a black baseball cap, threading her hair through the adjusting strap at the back to hold it in place.

The air was cool as she tiptoed out the back door, wound her way through the ferns and down the pebbled path to the jetty. She remembered seeing a track leading into the bush when she had walked back from the boat with Sarah and Tyler, and she followed this now, hoping a morning walk would be therapeutic. As she crept closer to the sea the fog enveloped her, seeping in through the native Manuka trees and Ponga ferns. The advancing sun penetrated the mist in long thin rays. It was beautiful, but eerie, and Kirsten walked in silence, the stillness surrounding her. A few birds began to wake and call as she followed the path round the hillside, and she saw a few Wekas foraging in the Pigfern growing in thick clumps on either side of the track. The brown flightless birds made a strange guttural sound as they moved. It reminded Kirsten of a teddy bear she had when she was little, which groaned morbidly as she tipped it upside down. She rounded a bend and through a gap in the trees saw that the sun had found a hole in the fog, and beamed down on the glass top surface of the water. It was like a picture you would expect to see on an inspiration gift card from the Christian bookshop and Kirsten stopped to watch the scene unfold before her. She leaned against a tall Manuka tree, the black bark leaving a soft film on her sleeve. She was awestruck by the sight; never before had she witnessed anything so beautiful.

She didn’t notice Jamie standing on the hillside. He was further enough along the path so he could remain undetected. He had stopped walking as soon as she had come into view, waiting to be seen. He crouched on the damp ground and steadied his camera, zoomed in to catch her expression. The light glinted off the halo of red hair from under her cap. Her makeshift ponytail flowed in soft curls down over her neck as she bowed her head to look at the scenery.

Kirsten heard the shutter click and the camera whir and she looked up, startled to find she was not alone.

She clutched at her chest. “Jesus Jamie, don’t do that to me.”

Jamie stood, smiled and walked down the path to where she stood. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“I didn’t think anyone else would be out here this early . . .,” she paused and pointed a finger at the camera. “You weren’t taking a photo of me were you?”

“Maybe.” Jamie grinned.

Kirsten put her hand up to her hair. “God, you’ll break the lens taking pictures of me in this state.”

Jamie chuckled. “Don’t be silly. You look absolutely fine.”

Kirsten blushed. Jamie was studying her closely, as if they had just met for the first time. Kirsten wondered if there were aliens living in the bush out here, and Jamie was constantly being inhabited by a different one. The Jamie before her was a creature she hadn’t met before. He was a red blooded male Jamie, watching her with an interest she had come to expect only from Tyler.

“Do you always lurk in the bushes early in the morning waiting for women to come walking past?” she teased.

Jamie laughed. “Hey, I wasn’t hiding. You just didn’t see me.”

“Yeah, sure.”

“And yes, I do walk down here often,” Jamie confirmed.

“Always this early?”

Jamie smiled. “Usually. I don’t sleep much, and it’s a great time to see birds.”

Kirsten surveyed him from the corner of her eye.

He grinned. “Not those kind of birds.”

“Are you heading out, or heading back?”

“Still heading out. You wanna join me?”

“Sure.” They walked in silence for a few moments, their feet crunching on the leaves covering the track. Kirsten had to walk double time to keep up with Jamie’s long stride. Being close to six foot he towered over her.

“Wait.” Jamie stopped short as they reached a dense part of the bush. He seemed to be listening for something. Kirsten could hear movement in the trees above them, and she followed Jamie’s gaze with interest. The heavy whir of a bird taking to flight, and the movement of a branch creaking in protest as the bird landed a few feet further away, helped her focus on what Jamie had stopped for. She watched him lift his camera and follow the dark green plumage. The bird was smaller than Kirsten expected for the noise it had made. It warbled noisily, a song that was shrill, then guttural, and absolutely exquisite. A second bird joined it; presumably of the opposite gender, and they communicated to each other, their calls sounding like a conversation, squeaking, whirring and whistling loudly.

“What is that?” Kirsten whispered.

“It’s a Bellbird.”

As quickly as they had arrived the pair flew off further down the hill, toward the bay, disappearing into the fog. Kirsten could still hear them, quieter now as they called out through the silent morning.

“Their song is so beautiful,” Kirsten remarked. “I’ve heard them before, but never this close.” She closed her eyes and listened.

“You hear those other two, further up the hill?” Jamie questioned. Kirsten focused her attention where Jamie had indicated. “Oh, yeah.”

“They’re Tuis.”

“How can you tell? They sound the same.” She looked at Jamie, trying to determine whether or not he was making fun of her.

But his face was serious; relaxed of all the tension he normally carried. She breathed him in, watched as he enjoyed the atmosphere of their surroundings. He smelled wonderful, reminding her of the first time she had seen him, standing on the patio. God that seemed like so long ago, she thought to herself. But it had only been a few weeks.

Jamie gazed down at her. She hadn’t noticed it before but his eyes were slightly different colours. Both were predominantly green, while the right eye had the tiniest amount of brown through the centre of the iris.

“If you listen carefully you can pick the differences.”

Kirsten had seen a Tui so she knew they were different in appearance. The Tui was a magnificent native bird, bold and black. In the sunlight its feathers shone green, and it had a small tuft of white feathers under the chin.

Kirsten laughed. “Nope, I can’t tell the difference.”

“Damn city girls,” Jamie teased as he nudged her shoulder with his arm, knocking her off balance.

“Hey.” She pushed him back and they both laughed.

It was another hour before they decided to head back to the house. The fog had cleared, leaving the bay shining under a blue sky and promising a temperature to top others the summer had already provided.

“Kirsten, can I ask you a huge favour?” Jamie asked as they passed the wharf. Tyler had already been out to the boat mooring, as the cruiser sat tied to the white posts of the jetty, water gently lapping around its hull.

“Yes, of course.” Kirsten stopped and looked up at Jamie, her forehead furrowing in curiosity.

“I’ve been asked to do some photos for a friend of mine. She’s getting married in a couple of weeks.”

Kirsten smiled. “That sounds nice.”

“Yeah, well, I’m normally home on the weekends for Sarah so I’m a little loathe to do it. Unless-,” Jamie paused.

“Unless?”

“Well, I was wondering, I know you normally don’t work the weekends, but if you would come with us, then I could take Sarah with me.”

Kirsten laughed. She was amused at how difficult Jamie found asking for this one favour. Obviously he wasn’t used to relying on others, which somehow seemed strange. He left Sarah during the week all the time, often with Beth and Tyler, or when they were busy, Craig. So why was this so different? Or was it because it was her?

“So this would be work?”

“Yes of course. I’ll pay you overtime-,”

“Jamie,” she interrupted, “I’m teasing.” She giggled and put her hand on his bare arm.

“If it was work, I’d have to say no.”

Jamie looked confused.

“I’d like to go into town anyway, so this will be a good excuse.”

“So you’ll do it?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Can I ask you one more thing?” His face grew sullen again.

“What?”

“Please don’t mention this to Beth or Tyler.”

Kirsten gazed at him questioningly.

“Don’t ask.” He smiled. “Just can you promise me? Don’t even tell Sarah what’s going on. I just want this to be as low key as possible.”

“Okay.”

Jamie saw the concern on her face and smiled reassuringly. “I know that sounds weird but,” he sighed. “You know what I said last night about Leigh?”

Kirsten nodded.

“Tyler has this thing about people being possessions, especially women. And I don’t think you would be an exception, regardless of whether you have set him straight or not.”

“Jamie, there’s nothing going on between us.”

“I know,” Jamie said quickly, “and you probably think you’ve got him all figured out on that score, but believe me there’s more to Tyler than what he chooses to show. If he knew I had taken you on this trip, he might make things uncomfortable for you. Just trust me on this.”

“Okay,” Kirsten said calmly.

“Really?” It was Jamie’s turn to look surprised.

“Yes, I won’t mention it. I’ve seen how the two of you are with each other, and if you don’t want to tell me anymore then that’s fine. I don’t need to know the history. The less I get caught up in this the better as far as I’m concerned.”

“Okay,” Jamie acknowledged. He sounded unsure about whether what she had said was good or bad.

They heard voices through the trees and turned to see Tyler with Leigh, walking down the track to the jetty. Tyler had something slung over one shoulder, and as they drew nearer Kirsten realised it was a gun.

“Morning,” Tyler said brightly.

“Hey.” Kirsten smiled. “You going to catch breakfast?”

Tyler laughed. “If you like shark.”

Jamie frowned. “You got shark problems again?”

Kirsten glanced from one man to the other.

“Yeah,” Tyler answered.

“At the Salmon Farm,” Leigh finished. Her arms were bent, fists planted neatly on her waist as she tried to look authoritative.

“Sharks?” Kirsten asked in alarm.

“Yeah Bronze Whalers,” Tyler confirmed. “Bastards have ripped a hole in one of the nets; had a nice little party last night.”

“Are they dangerous?” Kirsten asked.

“They can be.” Seeing her concern Jamie added, “But don’t worry, they don’t come this far down the sound. Sometimes they get lost up further, but it’s very rare to get them in here.”

“Oh, they have once or twice. Remember a couple of years ago Brian caught one in a net at the Heads?” Tyler smirked.

“Ahem.” Jamie nodded his head toward Kirsten and glared at Tyler. “The girls go swimming in the sea.” He was referring to Kirsten and Sarah. In the last few weeks, she had been encouraging Sarah to explore the bay, rather than forever swimming in the pool where there was little challenge. She looked at Jamie, surprised he had noticed this one change. What else had he been taking note of, pretending not to notice anything at all? Maybe she had misjudged his disinterest all along.

“Oh hey, I’m only kidding.” Tyler grinned. “Besides, they’ll be so full of my fantastic salmon now they won’t need to feed on anything for a while. I think you’re a bit pasty for a shark anyway Kirst.”

“Tyler!” Kirsten smacked him playfully on the arm.

Leigh giggled and the two of them wandered off to the jetty. Kirsten and Jamie continued back to the house.

“Would they really not come this far down the sound?” Kirsten’s voice rang with concern.

Jamie stopped, smiled and took her by the arm. “On this occasion I have to agree with Tyler. You’ve got nothing to worry about.”

She shivered, thinking about the menacing creature with dead eyes she had only seen in books and on television. “That Jaws movie used to always freak me out.”

Jamie laughed. “Bronze Whalers have nothing on Great Whites Kirsty. Completely different species.”

“So, they’re not harmful?”

Jamie smiled. “God, why do you always put me on the spot? You want the truth?”

Kirsten laughed. “Of course.”

“They’ve been known to attack humans unprovoked, but not very often. There have only been two attacks in New Zealand recorded, and neither of them was fatal.”

“Gee, that’s comforting,” Kirsten said sarcastically. She smiled at Jamie and they walked up the path to the house.

“Well, I’m going to hit the showers,” Jamie said as they climbed the steps to the patio.

“You’re changing the subject,” Kirsten teased.

Jamie turned as Kirsten walked up the last step, her head down to see where she was going. She bumped into his chest and he grabbed her around the waist.

“And you’re being paranoid,” he muttered as he smiled. His face was inches from hers.

She peered up at him from under the peak of her cap. “Am I?” All she could think about was how his arm felt around her waist, strong and warm against her back. She could feel his breath on her face and her heart raced.

“Daddy.” Sarah bounded out of the house and across the concrete. Jamie dropped his arm and turned to his daughter as she slammed into this hip. She was still in her pajamas; pink cotton shorts decorated with pictures of animated pigs.

“Good morning Sarah,” he beamed as he swung his camera out of the way and picked her up with little effort.

“Hey, sunshine.” Kirsten smiled as Sarah wrapped her legs around her father’s waist.

“Did you go for a walk?” Sarah asked.

“We did.” Jamie smiled. “Sorry, it was too early for you.”

“Well I’m going to go and get changed,” Kirsten said quickly. Sarah waved. “See you later alligator.”

Kirsten smiled at Sarah, avoiding Jamie’s stare. “In a while crocodile.”

She could feel him watching her as she left, but she daren’t meet his gaze, for fear she would give away what was going through her mind.

How could this be happening? When Jamie touched her it felt like pins and needles up her spine. She tried to think about what he was like on the occasions when she detested him, but still she couldn’t push away the thoughts of his gleaming green eyes, boring into her soul as he cast the magic of his smile over her. When it came to the two men, Tyler had one up on looks and charm, yet she had felt nothing when he kissed her, except a mild form of flattery that he should think of her that way. But she couldn’t help wonder what Jamie’s mouth would feel like against her own.

Stop it! She shook her head to get the thought from her mind. Those kinds of things would just get her into trouble. Trouble she really didn’t need right now.

Chapter 9

“Honey, don’t fidget,” Beth scolded Sarah as she attempted to straighten her red pleated skirt.

Sarah couldn’t stand still. Her grandmother was taking her to visit the school. The expectation written clearly on the child’s face should have delighted Beth, but it seemed to only irritate her further.

Kirsten could see she hated the fact she had been maneuvered into letting Sarah go. She had tried to make light of it, but Kirsten could see the woman struggling with it.

“Beth, would you like me to take her?” She had asked already, but it seemed like it needed to be repeated.

Beth glared at her. “No, I gotta take a look at this for myself.”

Kirsten held both palms up in surrender. “Okay.”

“But make yourself useful while I’m gone won’t you?” Beth scowled. Kirsten had to bite her lip to stop herself laughing. She knew this was all bravado, and not the real woman behind the mask. Beth was simply losing her grip on her granddaughter, and she knew it.

“Beth, stop fussing.” Craig, who had been trying to look busy at the sink turned and spoke softly to their boss.

“You keep your trap shut,” Beth snapped, but the corners of her mouth shook and a smile threatened to break her rough demeanour. “Now, we’re only going for a few hours Sarah, okay?”

Sarah nodded and smiled, knowing better than to argue when her grandmother was like this.

“If,” Beth continued, “and I mean if I decide you can go to school, it will only be for one day a week to start with, and Kirsten will be taking you there and back, is that clear?”

Kirsten and Craig stood side by side and raised their arms in a perfectly synchronized salute. Then they grinned at each other.

Beth only fumed further, “God, you two are as bad as each other.” She took Sarah by the hand and led her out to the car.

When she had gone Kirsten collapsed against the counter in a fit of laughter.

“That was brilliant.”

Craig laughed, hearty and deep. “She’s going to whip us later.”

“Oh, you’ll like that,” Kirsten teased. Over the weeks she had grown to like Craig very much. He was a big, gentle man, who spoke his mind.

“Hey, you know it’s her birthday next week don’t you?”

Kirsten looked up, surprised. “No, I didn’t. I’m glad you told me. I can get her something when I go to town this weekend.”

“Yeah, well that’s why I mention it. I was hoping you’d be able to get me a few things while you’re there. I want to have a bit of a birthday dinner for her.”

Kirsten smiled. “What a great idea, Craig.”

Craig blushed. It was something she had never seen him do before.

“So, if I give you a list will you have time to do some shopping?”

“Yes of course. How old will she be?”

“Fifty-six, I think.”

“Okay, well I’ll have to think of something to get her then won’t I?”

* * * *

Luckily nobody had questioned why Kirsten was taking Sarah to town with her on Saturday. They all knew Jamie would not be home for the weekend, and probably assumed he was working. Beth seemed quite relieved that she would not have to look after Sarah herself. Tyler would also be away so it would be a good break for her. Occasionally she seemed quite distant and tired, and Kirsten wondered if maybe she worked herself too hard sometimes.

Kirsten was apprehensive about her trip to Blenheim. She had not seen Jamie much over the last two weeks. When he had returned home last weekend he had spent a lot of time painting. His work was bringing him up fast on the publishing deadline for the book he had been commissioned for, so when he had emerged from his cave, he had been as moody and villainess as ever. Kirsten now wondered if the nice Jamie had been a figment of her imagination. Either that or he had just shown her that side of him so she would do this one favour.

They left early on Saturday morning. Kirsten helped Sarah pack an overnight bag and they climbed into Beth’s vehicle.

She drove slowly, still very weary of the dirt roads, but thankful they had all four wheels controlling their direction.

They stopped a couple of times. Sarah felt a little queasy, so Kirsten chatted, trying to keep her mind off the road.

When they got to the motel, Jamie was sitting outside their room. He shaded one hand over his eyes and smiled as they approached. He seemed completely relaxed in blue jeans, one ankle crossed and clasped in his right hand on his other knee.

“Dad, I’m going to school,” Sarah gushed as she ran into his arms.

“Really kitten?” Jamie hugged her and lifted her onto his lap.

“Ah-huh.” Sarah nodded. “Grammy said I could go once a week.”

Jamie smiled and looked up at Kirsten. He squinted into the bright mid morning sun, and Kirsten stepped forward, throwing a long shadow over his face.

“Thanks,” he said.

“You’re welcome,” she smiled. “What a great day.”

“I ordered it specially.” He looked at Sarah and winked.

“Dad, you did not,” Sarah replied seriously.

“So, what’s this I hear about school?” Jamie asked, looking back at Kirsten. “Don’t tell me you actually talked Beth into letting her go?”

Kirsten grinned. “Well, once a week for a start. But hey, it’s a good start.”

“She must be getting soft in her old age.”

“Oh, you don’t think it has anything to do with my crafty reasoning?” Kirsten mocked.

“Maybe. Or maybe it’s that fiery tongue of yours.” Jamie looked down at Sarah, who giggled.

Kirsten put both hands on her hips. “Ah, that’s the pot calling the kettle black isn’t it?” She smiled. It seemed Mr. Congeniality had returned, hopefully for the duration of their stay.

Jamie lifted Sarah from his lap, setting her down on her feet. “Shall I get your bags?”

He brought their bags from the car and took them into the room. The motel was a pleasant, relatively new building, with simply furnished rooms. There was a tiny kitchenette with a microwave and electric jug, then a large lounge. Off from this there were two bedrooms, one with a double bed and the other with two singles. Between the two bedrooms was a small bathroom, with a shower, basin and toilet. Sarah quickly scrambled into the bathroom, picking up all the little bottles of shampoo and packets of soap.

“I’ll put myself and Sarah in the single beds, you can have the double.”

“Oh, no, I can go in with Sarah,” Kirsten said with haste. “I don’t mind.”

“Yay, I get to sleep with dad,” Sarah shouted from the bathroom. Jamie grinned. “I guess she just decided for you.”

* * * *

After they had settled in Jamie took them into town for lunch. Blenheim was a sleepy little town, with all the main stores Christchurch had, but on a much smaller scale. They had one movie theatre where Christchurch had several multiplex cinemas, two jewelers, where Kirsten was used to seeing two or three in every mall. There were two supermarkets, which Kirsten made a mental note of so she could return for the things Craig had requested.

“You’ll be a good girl for Kirsten won’t you?” Jamie asked as he got ready to leave later in the day. The wedding was at three o’clock and he had to make sure he was at the church well before the bride.

Sarah smiled and nodded as she touched her fathers tie. “Dad, you look so handsome.”

“Do I?” Jamie stood up and looked at Kirsten for confirmation. She had been thinking the same thing, well before Sarah said it. He had showered and dressed in a charcoal suit, his pants pressed and falling in neat lines against his muscular frame.

“Yes, you do,” Kirsten felt her cheeks heat.

Jamie smiled as he picked up his camera cases. “I should be home around nine. Normally the bride doesn’t want anymore photos once she starts slurring her words.”

Kirsten laughed. “We might catch a movie or something, eh Sarah?”

Sarah clapped her hands with delight. “Yes please!”

Jamie took his wallet from his inside jacket pocket and pulled out several crisp notes.

“Why don’t you get something nice for tea? I bet you’ve been missing takeaways?” He grinned.

“No.” Kirsten pushed his hand away. “That will be my treat.”

“Are you sure? I feel guilty asking you here and then having you pay for Sarah.”

“Nonsense,” Kirsten scoffed. “I told you I’d do it if it wasn’t considered work, and I meant it.”

“Okay,” Jamie seemed unsure, but he put the money away. “I’ll have to think of some other way to thank you.”

Kirsten studied him carefully. Just what had he meant by that? His eyes twinkled and a smile played at the corners of his mouth.

Kirsten watched him as he left. There was a tension between them she knew he also felt.

To take her mind off it she took Sarah into town, and they ate popcorn in the movie theatre while they watched a Disney movie. Afterwards they purchased a huge bucket of greasy chicken and took it back to the motel.

Sarah fell asleep on the couch shortly after nine o’clock. She had been determined to stay awake until Jamie returned, but had been unable to keep her eyes open. Kirsten left her there for Jamie to carry to the bedroom. She looked so sweet in the light of the television, her eyes relaxed in sleep, her mouth slack and open. Kirsten heard Jamie’s vehicle just before ten o’clock and crept to the door to let him in. She waited until she saw the headlights disappear then pulled the door open. Jamie climbed from the car, carrying a large bottle of champagne. He grinned as he approached. His jacket was unbuttoned and thrown open, his tie and shirt loose around his neck.

“Perks of the job,” he said as he closed the door behind him.

“I have another job for you.” Kirsten smiled as she pointed to the couch. “Someone needs to go to bed.”

“Oh,” Jamie handed Kirsten the wine and then scooped Sarah up into his arms. She stirred and moaned.

“Hi, Dad,” she said in a tiny sleepy voice.

“Hi, Baby.” Jamie kissed her on the forehead. “Did you have a good night?”

Sarah smiled as if she were having a wonderful dream. “Yeah. Can we go to the duck park tomorrow dad?”

“Yes we can.” They disappeared into the bedroom and Kirsty took the bottle of bubbles into the kitchen. There were no champagne flutes in the cupboard, but she found two glass tumblers and set them on the counter. Jamie returned to the lounge, took off his shoes and socks then walked in bare feet across the oatmeal coloured carpet to the kitchen.

Kirsten handed him back the bottle. “How was the wedding?”

Jamie’s face was expressionless as he pierced the gold foil around the top of the bottle and unwound the wire holding the plastic cork in place.

“It was a wedding.”

Kirsten smiled. “Typical male response. Was the bride beautiful?”

Jamie smirked and shrugged. “I guess.” He put his thumbs either side of the cork and pushed until it gave a loud pop. It flew across the kitchen, deflected against a top cupboard and bounced onto the floor. Kirsten put her hands over her head for protection.

Jamie laughed and poured the fizzing liquid into the two glasses Kirsten had produced.

“You guess?” Kirsten smiled. “What kind of dress did she have?”

Jamie moved around to her side of the counter, looking annoyed by her questions.

“You women are all the same. You don’t even know this person, but when it comes to weddings you go all gushy.”

“Of course.” Kirsten grinned.

Jamie stared down at her with an intensity that seemed to burn her skin.

“To tell the truth I was preoccupied.”

Kirsten swallowed. There was that tension between them again, so thick in the air she could have cut it with a knife. Something was happening between them and Jamie was letting it happen; making it happen. “Taking photos?”

“Ah-huh, that and-,” he paused, his eyes moving to her mouth. “This.” He bent over and covered her mouth with his own. Kirsten closed her eyes and leaned in to him; let the feel of his kiss seep through her veins. Their glasses clinked as he looped his free arm around her waist and pulled her gently toward him. His tongue pushed her lips open with an urgency she quickly responded to.

When the kiss was over he straightened again and looked down at her. “I’m sorry, but I really wanted to do that, before I started drinking.”

“Wow.” Kirsten breathed out slowly, not sure where to look. Jamie laughed then took a sip of his wine. “Say something.”

Kirsten smiled and stared back at Jamie. “You never cease to amaze me. I’m never lost for words. But you have this habit of catching me off guard at every opportunity.”

“Is that such a bad thing?”

“I’m not sure.” Kirsten took a generous gulp of wine. The bubbles went straight to her nose and she screwed up her face in protest. “Why did you want to do that before you had something to drink, might I ask?”

Jamie put his glass on the bench and lifted his hand to her face, bringing her gaze back to his. “Because I didn’t want you to think I had to be under the influence to make the first move.”

“You are such a mystery Jamie Grainger. I don’t know if I’ll ever figure you out,”

Kirsten sighed.

“Does that mean I haven’t scared you off?” He grinned.

“It would take a lot more than that to scare me off,” Kirsten smiled.

“Oh, is that a challenge?” Jamie raised his eyebrows.

“You take it how you want,” Kirsten whispered.

Jamie lowered his head and Kirsten closed her eyes as he murmured against her lips,

“Okay, I will.”

She moaned as he pushed her back against the bench and his mouth moved over hers with blatant desire. His hands were in her hair; pulling at the scrunchy she had keeping her ponytail in place. The smell of him wafted around her, enveloped her, making her giddy, as his mouth, insistent against hers continued. He lowered his hand from her waist and grabbed hold of her bottom, and she arched her back against him, whined in surprise at the feel of his hands holding her so tight. With both hands he lifted her up onto the bench top, and she fumbled with her wine before it spilled. Settling the glass onto the counter, she wrapped both arms around his neck as he pushed himself between her legs, still kissing her all the while. Then he moved to her neck, kissed his way down to the edge of her shirt, moved back up to slide his tongue around the rim of her ear. She gasped with pleasure and pushed her head back, as her hands pulled him by the neck toward her.

“God, I’ve wanted to do this since the first time I saw you,” Jamie murmured as he buried his head in the crook of her neck. She found his hand and laced their fingers together.

“You mean when you thought I was Tyler’s bimbo girlfriend?” she smiled. Jamie laughed softly. “That didn’t stop me from wanting you.” He lifted his head and looked at her. “With your wild hair and fiery eyes.”

“Oh, is that what it is?” she taunted. “You think you can tame me?”

He laughed and his lips glistened in the pale light from the kitchen halogens. “Why would I want to change you?”

Kirsten shimmied her weight to the edge of the bench and spliced her ankles together behind his back. Then she pulled his tie from under his collar and discarded it onto the counter.

“Seriously,” she asked, “are you sure you want to do this?”

Jamie smiled. “Why do you think I kissed you before the wine came out? I don’t want this to be a drunken encounter Kirsty.” He lifted her hand and kissed her fingertips. “I can’t promise anything beyond this, but right now I can’t think of anything I’d rather be doing.”

It was enough for Kirsten. She carefully unbuttoned his shirt and slipped her hands inside against his skin. He had a small spattering of golden hairs on his chest and she moved her hands under his arms and over his shoulders, gripping him so their bodies were pressed together.

Jamie groaned and his breath quickened as he kissed her hungrily. She could feel his heart beneath his chest, beating wildly, and it fueled her own desire. In one swift movement Jamie lifted her off the bench and swung her around, taking her through the lounge and into the main bedroom.

“Are you sure Sarah’s asleep?” Kirsten asked.

“She’s out like a light. You saw her.”

“Okay.” Kirsten accepted as Jamie lowered her to the ground, placed her on the floor with her back to the bed. She pushed his jacket from his shoulders and threw it onto the mattress behind her.

Jamie found the buttons on Kirsten’s shirt, his big fingers fumbled nervously as he undid them one by one. Then he slipped it off her shoulders, kissed her neck and cupped her breast with one hand. She reached behind her back and plucked her bra strap open, and Jamie raked it from her chest. He pushed her back onto the bed and she wriggled her way up to the pillows, watched him crawl onto the bed after her. The bulge in his trousers was evidence of his desire and he loosened them quickly, kicked them to the floor then straddled her in his open shirt and underwear. His lips moved over her nipples and they hardened as a heat rose in her belly with involuntary force. She arched her back and sighed against him. His warm hands were on her waist, cupping her breast, tugging at her neck, as he covered every inch of her with his mouth. Warm and wet, his mouth moved fervently over hers and she pushed her tongue between his lips, fingernails dug into his shoulders as she pulled him down to her. His fingers found the dome on her jeans and he popped it without hesitation, unzipped and pulled them from her legs before he cast them across the room. A handful of coins jangled from the pockets and rolled onto the floor, hitting the wall like metal confetti.

“Oops.” Jamie smiled.

Kirsten giggled. “The cleaners will have fun with that tomorrow.”

“Ah-huh,” Jamie murmured as he kissed her again.

Kirsten wrapped her arms around his back, slid her fingers down the length of his torso and felt the curve of his spine disappear into the soft mound of his fleshy buttocks. She felt him tense beneath her hands as she tugged at the elastic of his cotton boxers and slid them gently down around his thighs. She dropped one hand to his front and cupped him into her palm. Jamie groaned as he pushed his upper body upright to remove his shirt and dangling underwear. He knelt over her, now naked, his body bronze in the dim light which emanated through the door from the television. She looked down at her own porcelain skin, her legs held firmly between his own as he hovered over her. He bent again and took one of her nipples between his teeth, teasing it to a hard peak, his hand

manipulating the other breast until she cried out. The heat in her groin rose again, making her squirm beneath him, and he slid one hand into her knickers, pushed the soft cloth aside. His fingers found her already wet inside. He lifted his leg and pushed one knee between her trembling limbs, slipped his finger gently inside her. She gasped and arched her back as her breast pulsed up into his waiting mouth. He teased her nipple with his tongue as his fingers slid in and out of her, bringing her pleasure to a crescendo she could not return from.

Kirsten raked her fingers through her own hair. Sweat beaded her forehead as she writhed beneath him, her pelvis rising and falling with the timing of his hands between her legs.

Her body quivered as she whispered, “I want you inside me.”

Jamie moved back to her face, watching her with eyes she had never seen so alive before. He smiled, but his hand continued to work her seductively. His hair, tousled and damp at the temples hung down and framed his face with soft shadows. She looked down at him, he was so hard and ready, her pleasure bringing him to his own. She put her hand down to take off her underwear, but he held her fast, so instead she took his erection into her hand and gripped it tightly. Jamie moaned, closed his eyes, lowered his head and kissed her, his breath coming in short gasps. She softened her grip and massaged his shaft gently. All her senses seemed to collide into one, muted and melded into a completely new sensation that was all Jamie.

“God, you’re so wet,” Jamie murmured in her ear.

She moaned, “Take me, Jamie.”

“I love the way my name sounds on your lips.” He traced the outline of her mouth with one finger, while the other hand pushed her clinging knickers from her body.

“Jamie,” she whispered against his fingertips.

He answered her by pushing himself between her legs, and as he entered her she cried out. He was so firm and full. He pulsed into her then withdrew slowly, teasing her with every movement.

She threw her arms out to either side of her, clutching at the blankets as she pushed her head back into the pillow. As he slid himself inside her again she moaned and grabbed him by the shoulders, pulling him back down to her. Her lips found his neck and she grazed her teeth over the muscular flesh between his neck and shoulder. He quickly withdrew and entered her again, the pressure of her teeth increasing with his own mounting urgency. They moved together, settling into a slow rhythm of pulsating pleasure.

She could feel his excitement rising, their bodies moving autonomously, steaming together in corresponding harmony. He shifted his weight and moved his mouth down over hers. She felt him reach the point of no return and she tilted her pelvis up, letting her muscles contract around him as he climaxed. She closed her eyes and felt him quiver then relax against her. The only sound was their breathing, short and laboured, his heart throbbing against her through his gleaming chest. When their breathing had slowed he lifted his head and kissed her, letting his tongue fall into her mouth with soft expectation, as if they had come full circle. Kirsten sighed and smiled. “You’ll have to watch yourself. I’m beginning to think you’re not as cranky as you make out to be.”

“Oh, you haven’t seen me cranky yet,” Jamie teased. He laughed and Kirsten felt the vibration all the way to her toes.

Withdrawing, Jamie turned and lay next to her on the other pillow. She rolled and snuggled into the crook of his arm. His hand found the small of her back and he rubbed the skin there with his fingers. He pushed himself back, tugged at a second pillow to prop under his shoulders and Kirsten let her head fall onto his chest. As he moved, his jacket fell from the end of the bed, landing with a thump onto the floor. The sound was more than Kirsten would have expected to be just the soft cloth of his jacket.

“What do you have in your pocket?” she murmured against the fair hairs around his nipples.

“Oh shit, I forgot about that.” Jamie squeezed her around the waist. “That’s for you.”

“What?” Kirsten pulled back onto her elbow, resting her head in the palm of her hand as she looked up at Jamie.

“Yeah.” He grinned. He slid his arm from under her and moved to retrieve the jacket from the floor. He pulled a small black velvet box from the outside pocket and threw it across the bed. “I saw you admiring them today at Michael Hill, and seeing as you wouldn’t let me compensate you for this weekend, then this is my way of saying thanks.”

Kirsten stared wide-eyed at the box. She smiled as she opened it. A small pair of silver rain drop shaped earrings, implanted with tiny emeralds, twinkled in the dim light of the bedroom. She was stunned. She did remember seeing them, even paying particular attention to them as they passed, but she had no idea he had watched her, or that he even knew which pair she had been admiring.

She looked up at him, her eyes misting slightly as she said, “Jamie, you’re amazing.”

“Why thank you.” Jamie climbed back onto the bed beside her, looking pleased with her reaction.

She reached over and smacked him with a kiss. “I can’t believe you did that. Thank you.”

“Hey, gotta keep you on your toes.” He smirked as he took her into his arms once more.

“Well, you certainly do that.” she frowned. “You’re so full of surprises I’m not sure what to expect next.”

“I think next we should think about sleep. I hate to be the realistic one here, but Sarah will be awake early.”

Kirsten giggled and crawled beneath the blankets while Jamie got up to turn off the lights and the television. She placed the earrings on the night stand.

“I can go back to the other room if you’d prefer.” Jamie stood in the doorway, looking down at Kirsten.

“No, don’t be silly.” Kirsten patted the pillow. “Please.”

Jamie climbed into the bed next to her and she pushed herself back into his arms. His body curved around her and his arm encircled her waist. She took his hand in hers and cupped it to her chest.

“Jamie?”

“Yes?” His mouth was close to her shoulder and she could feel his quiet exhalation on her back.

“What happened with you and Leigh?”

She could tell by the way his body moved he was laughing. “How did I know you were going to ask me that?”

Kirsten smiled in the dark. “Sorry, you don’t have to answer.”

Jamie sighed. “It’s not as exciting as you might think. I met Leigh in Nelson about three years ago. When I took her home she met Tyler, who consequently offered her a job in one of his restaurants. I guess his bed was warmer than mine, because that’s where she ended up. Tyler did everything he could to lure her away from me. He’s despised me ever since I married his sister.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, he and Brook were extremely close. He always treated me as though I came between them.”

Kirsten sighed. “I don’t understand that.”

“Well, he’s always been overbearing and protective when it comes to Brook. She was molested by their father and I think he’s always thought he had to protect her.”

“Beth told me about that.” Kirsten cringed as the lie rolled from her lips. She certainly didn’t want Jamie to know she had heard it from Brook herself.

“They both had counseling for a long time, but sometimes I think Brook got over it better than Tyler did.”

“Well, possibly he felt partially responsible. A lot of people close to the victim do in those kinds of situations. They hold a lot of guilt for not preventing or even being aware of what was going on.”

“You sound a lot like Freud.” Jamie laughed. “Whatever it is, he can’t let it go. Even now Brook is dead.”

Kirsten shivered as she thought about Brook. She had been Jamie’s wife, and now Kirsten was here with him, sharing their intimacies.

“What was she like?” Kirsten whispered.

“Brook?”

“Yeah.”

“God, you’re one out of the box Kirst.” He kissed the back of her ear lobe. “We’re in bed together and you’re asking me, first about Leigh, and now my wife.”

Kirsten turned to face him, touching his face in the dark. “Is that wrong?”

“No.”

“It must have been hard for you, losing her when you did.”

“We were both so young you know,” Jamie murmured. “Sarah was born a week before I turned twenty one. Brook was the same age as you are now when she was killed. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if we didn’t get married when we did. She might still be alive.”

Kirsten was bewildered. What could the two of them getting married have to do with Brook’s death?

“Why would you say that?”

“Oh, I’m just being philosophical really,” Jamie answered. “But with Tyler being so in the picture I often wonder what would have happened if I had walked away and let them be.”

“You shouldn’t walk away from love, don’t you know that?” Kirsten smiled. She rolled back to her other side and nestled back against him once more. Jamie didn’t reply, just kissed her softly on the shoulder blade.

Kirsten closed her eyes and listened to him breathing. She wondered what was going through his mind, but she didn’t ask. She had needled him enough for one night. She wondered what this meant for them now; how it would change things. A part of her felt guilty that she had let this happen with Sarah’s father. It was something she had vowed would never happen. But it was too late to worry about that now. She had let the physical attraction between them rule her head and passion had set her on an unknown path.

She would worry about the finer details when morning found them. For now she was happy just to go to sleep in Jamie’s arms.

Chapter 10

The deep sound of a truck horn woke Kirsten the next morning. Remembering what had happened the night before she smiled and rolled over to find the bed empty. She stretched, sat up and looked around the room. The only sign that Jamie had ever been there was the handful of coins, strewn over the floor, and the smell of him which lingered on her skin.

As her mind focused she could hear voices from outside the bedroom door, which had been closed at some stage.

Jamie and Sarah were in the kitchen, their voices muffled but distinct through the thin paneled door. Kirsten climbed out of bed, pulled on her jeans, quickly buttoned her shirt, pushed her hair back from her face and ventured out to the lounge. Both Sarah and Jamie looked up as the new door squeaked on its hinges.

“Good morning, Kirsty,” Sarah beamed under a chocolate milk moustache.

“Morning sunshine,” Kirsten replied.

“How did you sleep?” Jamie’s mouth curled into a crooked smile.

“Very well thank you.”

“I slept with dad,” Sarah said matter-of-factly before she shoveled a spoonful of cocoa pops into her mouth.

Funny, so did I, Kirsten thought. She looked up at Jamie, who winked as though he had read her thoughts. She was not surprised that Jamie had snuck back to the other room before Sarah woke. It wouldn’t have been the easiest thing in the world to explain to an eight year old why dad was in bed with the nanny.

“Cool,” Kirsten looked up at Jamie, who stood barefoot on the tiled kitchen floor. He wore faded denim wranglers and a clean blue shirt, sleeves rolled up to the elbows and hair still damp and tousled from the shower.

She walked to the front door which had been opened to the mid morning sun. A cool breeze wafted in as she stood in the rectangle of sunlight cast onto the carpet. She curled her toes as warmth emanated up through her feet. She turned to see Jamie watching her with interest. As she stretched she remembered she had not put any underwear on yet, so he could probably see right through her top as she stood side on to the door.

“I might go have a shower.” She smiled back at him.

“Good idea.” He turned his attention back to the morning paper as she padded through to the bathroom.

* * * *

When she returned Sarah was in front of the television, eyes glued on a cartoon as she sat, cross legged on the sofa.

“So, what’s the plan today?” Kirsten asked Jamie. She scrunched her hair gently with a towel, in an attempt to dry without turning it into a frizzy birds nest.

“Well Sarah wants to go to Pollard Park. Do you have anything you want to do?”

“I thought I might look for a nice dress to wear to Beth’s birthday party next weekend.”

Jamie grinned. “Good luck with that. I should have told you yesterday, but Blenheim is a ghost town on a Sunday.”

“Oh bugger.” Kirsten pouted. “What about the supermarkets?”

“They’ll be open, but I doubt you’ll find much to wear there.” Jamie grinned.

“Oh, ha ha.” Kirsten smiled. “No, Craig gave me a list of stuff he wants, that’s all. At least I can get that done.”

“Well, how about we all go to the park first?”

“Great,” Kirsten answered. “I’ll shoot into the supermarket before we head out of town, there’s one in Springlands isn’t there?”

“Ah-huh.” Jamie reached across the counter and touched Kirsten’s hand. “In case I forget to tell you later, thank you for coming out this weekend. It’s been great to spend some time with Sarah, away from the house.”

“It was my pleasure.” She rubbed Jamie’s fingers with her thumb. Remnant thoughts of their night spent together surfaced in her mind and she smiled. It was clear that it was to be their secret, at least for now. That suited her fine. She needed time to process what had happened between them, and how she felt about it.

* * * *

After they had eaten they packed their bags and Jamie checked out while Kirsten and Sarah milled around the car. Kirsten leaned against the boot and watched Sarah jump between the coloured stones which decorated the driveway. The little girl hummed under her breath, her pigtails bounced behind her while her arms stuck out at a forty five degree angle to balance herself. She glanced up at Jamie as he came back from the office. Kirsten mused over how relaxed he appeared to be. He was a different person away from the house; away from Tyler. Still she couldn’t help wonder why he continued to stay there, let Sarah stay there, if it was so uncomfortable for him. Did he stay for Beth? Did he know, despite their differences that Beth was terrified he would take Sarah away from her? Is that what made him stay? He didn’t owe Beth anything, did he? Surely she could still be a part of Sarah’s life wherever they were. Kirsten took her sunglasses out of her handbag and slipped them on.

“We’ll take my car to the park if you like. I’ll drop you back here later.”

“Okay.” Kirsten helped Sarah into the back seat then settled into the front beside Jamie. The diesel engine rattled to life and Kirsten glanced around as Jamie drove through town.

“Is that a CB radio?” Kirsten asked, pointing to a black box with small white buttons along the front.

“Yep.” Jamie smiled. “It’s a marine one. I did a big stint a few years ago, photographing marine life off the Nelson coast.”

“Oh wow, that must have been interesting.”

“Yeah, it was. I’ve just always kept the radio.” He looked into the rear vision mirror and winked at Sarah. “Besides, I can use it to chat with Sarah sometimes. Tyler has one in the office, and on the boat.”

“Doesn’t that mean everyone who has one of these can hear you?” Kirsten asked. She was not that clear on how they worked.

“On certain channels they can. But you can have your own private channel.”

“Oh, okay.”

“If I want to listen to the coast guard I can go to this one.” Jamie pressed a button and the radio buzzed with static.

“. . . think we’ll stay out another night.”

“Okay Ken, talk to you tomorrow then. Take care.”

Kirsten smiled. “Wow, so you can talk to all the other boats too?”

Jamie smiled. “If you really want to.”

“Ever hear anything juicy on there?”

Jamie chuckled. “No, can’t say that I have.”

“What a shame.”

* * * *

They wandered in the park for a couple of hours. Sarah chased ducks, skipped through the rose garden and played on the adventure playground. She was delighted when Jamie climbed the two storey wooden fortress and sat cross legged inside, humouring her as she pretended he was her prisoner.

Kirsten sat in the sun and watched them, amused.

When they got back to the motel, Jamie helped Sarah into the passenger seat, hugged her before he strapped her in. Then he took Kirsten by the hand and led her to the back of the car, where they were out of Sarah’s line of sight.

“I’ve had a fantastic time, thank you.” Kirsten smiled.

“I know we haven’t had a chance to talk about last night,” Jamie paused, as if he wasn’t quite sure what to say. “I mean really talk.”

“I know what you mean.” Kirsten smiled. “It’s okay.”

“Good. I don’t want things to be awkward between us. Can we talk about this when I come home for the weekend?”

“Of course.”

Jamie stooped forward and let his lips brush her mouth with a quick kiss. Then he walked to the driver’s door and opened it for her. She climbed in and pulled the seatbelt over, clicked it into place.

“Bye dad.” Sarah waved at her father.

“Bye sweetie. Have a good week and I’ll see you on Friday night.” He looked at Kirsten. “Drive safely.”

Kirsten smiled. “Oh, I intend on doing just that.”

She started the car and reversed it out of the car park, turned, then pulled out of the driveway. She glanced into the rear vision mirror to see Jamie watching them, his hands deep in his pockets as they turned the corner and disappeared from sight. All week she wondered what had been on his mind as they left. What did this mean for them from now on? Guilty thoughts led her back to her encounter with Greg Hamilton, but just as quickly she shook it from her mind. This was completely different. However, she regretted not taking the time to explain it to Jamie. It would have been a weight off her mind. She had never told anyone the whole truth. Maybe if the time was right next weekend, and she got some time alone with Jamie, she would tell him what had happened.

There were other things though, which kept her mind off Jamie. When they arrived home she was surprised to find Craig and Beth in the hot pool together. Her mind moved into overdrive and little things she had wondered about seemed to fall into place. Is that where Beth disappeared to when she went ‘walking’ at night?

“Craig, you and Beth seemed quite cosy in the pool the other night when we came home,” Kirsten teased as they were alone in the kitchen one night. “You’re not holding a candle for my boss are you?”

Craig’s cheeks turned the same colour as the freshly boiled beetroot he held in his right hand. He grinned. “Whatever would make you think that?”

“Oh, a woman notices these things.” Kirsten poked him in the ribs with one finger.

“Hey, it’s nothing.” Craig smiled. “We enjoy each others company, that’s all. I certainly wouldn’t push the boundaries. She’s my boss too you know. How weird would that be?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Kirsten replied. “Stranger things have happened.”

There was something else too, which played over and over in Kirsten’s mind. It was something Jamie had said to her when they had been talking about Brook. Tyler and his sister had both been to a counselor. Why would they both go if only Brook was molested by their father?

Short of asking the question, Kirsten had one option to find the answer. She sought out Brook’s diary, to see if the answer lay on the pages within. She felt like a naughty school girl, hidden away in the pool house, one ear cocked toward the door in case somebody walked in and caught her. How on earth would she explain that one? She soon found herself engrossed in the everyday happenings of Brook.

April 23rd

This house is so claustrophobic sometimes. I need to get away from here. Jamie and I can’t get on with our lives with Tyler as a constant shadow. I wake up in the middle of the night, watch Sarah and Jamie sleeping so peacefully and think maybe I should just wake them up, pack our bags and leave. Go somewhere we can just be by ourselves . . .

April 24th

Mum thinks she took me away from a monster, helped me forget. She did her best. But it followed us here. Tyler thinks everything is fine, but it’s not. He’s not. He refuses to deal with what dad did to us and how it affected him. How it still affects him. I can’t be there for him anymore. He needs to deal with his own demons. I have Jamie to think about and Sarah . . .

Kirsten put the book back in its hiding place and sighed, stared out the window. Could it be that Tyler had also been molested by their father? It certainly sounded like that was the case reading Brooks words.

What he did to us . . .

Could it explain why Tyler seemed to have a major hang-up when it came to relationships? Why he had never settled down, why he had no regard for others, moreover Jamie and the way he treated people like they were possessions?

What had kept Brook here? Why hadn’t she just told Jamie how she felt? They could have left, made a life for themselves somewhere else. She would probably still be alive. Kirsten had so many questions, but nobody to ask them. She would just have to keep reading and let the story unfold in Brook’s words. She was sure eventually the whole story would reveal itself, for her to better understand what happened here. She put it to the back of her mind as Friday approached. Jamie was returning from Nelson and she was keen to see what kind of reception she would get. It was a fantastic day, and she had taken Sarah to the beach for the afternoon. Sarah had desperately wanted to go horse riding. Her new friend from school, Lacey, had

invited her to their farm where they had several horses. Kirsten knew she would be pushing her luck with Beth if she asked, and knew better than to go behind her back, so had instead talked Sarah into shell collecting for a collage.

“Look at this one, Kirsty,” Sarah yelled excitedly as she skipped across the beach.

“Wow.” Kirsten took the smooth white oval and held it up to the sun so she could see it properly. “What kind of shell is that?”

Sarah looked thoughtful for a moment. “Is it a cockle shell?”

“No.” Kirsten put her hand into the red satchel she carried, slung over one shoulder. Several shells jangled against each other as she fumbled for what she was looking for. Her fingers found the ribbed surface of a cockle shell and she pulled it out for Sarah to see. “This one is a cockle shell.”

Sarah grinned. “Then it must be a Pipi!”

“Well done.” Kirsty dropped both shells into the sack.

“Actually, it’s called a Paphies Australis,” Jamie said from his vantage point at the end of the beach, where he had been watching them for the last few minutes. He grinned as they both turned in surprise at the sound of his voice.

“Dad.” Sarah ran to his side and hugged him around the waist.

“Hey, Sarah.” He bent and kissed the top of her head. Kirsten ambled over to them, smiled. “How long have you been standing there?”

“Not long.” Sarah released him and he put both hands into the pockets of his tan cotton pants. His eyes twinkled as smile lines appeared around the edges of his mouth.

“Did you bring me something, Dad?” Sarah gazed up at her father in expectation.

“Of course. Don’t I always?”

“Yay, what did you get me?” Sarah pulled at the waistline of his trousers. Jamie tapped her on the nose with a long broad finger. “Why don’t you go on up to your room and find out.”

“Okay.” Sarah skipped up the beach a few metres, then turned and asked, “Aren’t you coming?”

“We’ll be up in a few minutes. I just want to talk to Kirsty.”

“Alright.” Sarah clambered over the rocks and disappeared into the thicket of bush between the shore and the house.

Jamie turned back to Kirsten. It had been a hot afternoon and she had removed her shoes to walk barefoot on the rocky shore. She wore a straight denim skirt, which came to just above her knee, and a striped sleeveless blouse she had unbuttoned from the bottom and tied into a knot across her stomach.

Jamie smiled down at her. “Hi.” He sounded unsure of how he would be received.

“Hi, yourself.” Kirsten pushed a loose strand of hair from her face.

“Sorry about sneaking up on you like that. I wasn’t snooping; I just thought I might be able to get you on your own down here instead of waiting ‘til later.”

“Well, you’re entitled to snoop on me. I am teaching your daughter,” Kirsten teased. She was pleased he had sought her out as soon as he had arrived home. Maybe it meant he had feelings for her, past the one night they had spent together.

“You know that’s not what I meant.” Jamie smirked.

“I know.”

He took a step closer, looked down as he took her fingers into his hand. “Can I be completely honest with you?”

Oh God, here it comes. Kirsty swallowed hard. “I would hope you’d be nothing else with me.” She waited for the easy let down she was sure would follow.

“I like you. I really do.” Jamie lifted her hand and studied her slender fingers as if they were a diversion. “And that scares me.”

“Scares you, why?” Kirsty frowned.

He smiled as he lifted his eyes to hers. “I loved Brook, with the passion of a smitten teenage boy. She was a wonderful woman and mother. When she died I felt so guilty.”

“Guilty?” Kirsten was shocked. She put her free hand on Jamie’s arm. “Why would you feel guilty Jamie? It wasn’t your fault.”

“Not directly. But I felt like I hadn’t given her everything I could have. You see I loved her, but I don’t think I was in love with her. And in that respect I let her down. I wasn’t there for her like she needed me to be. I knew she wanted to leave her family, make her own life with Sarah, somewhere else, but I chose my work over her needs, not wanting to admit I couldn’t give her what she wanted. So when she died I felt I could have prevented it. And then, when the guilt passed I just felt empty, like the best chance I’d had at happiness was gone forever.”

Kirsten gave him a compassionate look, waited for him to continue.

“These last few weeks, coming home has been like waking up at Christmas time when I was a kid.” He grinned and his face lit up, lifting ten years off his age. “I should feel that way all the time I know, coming home to Sarah. But there are things I can’t tell you, yet anyway,” he touched her face softly, “and I haven’t felt that way for a long time. But with you here it feels almost like coming home again, like when Brook was alive.”

Kirsten blushed and dropped her gaze, unsure of where to look. “I-,” she paused, collected her thoughts before she said the wrong thing. “I didn’t know.”

Jamie smiled. “Good, I’m pleased about that. I don’t like being an open book.”

“Really?” Kirsty’s sarcasm was obvious. “I never would’ve guessed.” She grinned.

“Seriously, I haven’t scared you off have I?” Jamie raised his eyebrows. Kirsten shook her head. “No, you haven’t scared me off.”

“Good. I don’t want you to think I rushed into the other night and it was just a casual thing between us. On the other hand I want to make it clear I don’t want to rush anything. This is all new to me. There are things you don’t know about me, that you should, and I will tell you when the time is right. There is also everyone else to consider, including Sarah.”

Kirsten nodded her head in agreement. “I understand that.”

“I don’t want you to take this the wrong way, as it’s no reflection on you, but I’d like to keep us just between ourselves as long as we can.”

“There are things I need to tell you too,” Kirsten conceded. “But as you say, we have time, and taking it slowly suits me just fine.”

Jamie took her into his arms, pressed his lips to hers. She wrapped her arm around his neck and kissed him back, enjoyed the feel of his warm mouth on hers. Her spine tingled as his hand found the small of her back, pulled her closer to him. She pressed herself up against his chest.

Breathlessly he whispered into her ear, “I’ve been waiting all week to do that.”

Kirsten squeezed him tighter. He smelled so great it made her giddy. She giggled.

“Me too.”

They walked back to the house, their secret tucked deep into their pockets as they resumed normal behaviour in front of everyone else. Kirsten smiled to herself. If Beth and Craig could do it, surely she could keep her own feelings concealed too.

It was, however, harder than she thought. All through dinner she felt Jamie’s eyes on her, even though he maintained the hardened exterior she was so used to. She knew him to be different now. This harsh, rude Jamie he presented to Brook’s family was not the real man, it was his safeguard; his protection. Soon enough, she hoped, he would unravel to her the mystery behind his strange act.

After their meal she sat with Beth and Tyler on the porch, watched the sun set in dulcet tones of orange and yellow, while Jamie spent the evening upstairs with Sarah.

“You’re rather quiet this evening dear,” Beth observed. Kirsty shook the thoughts of Jamie from her head and smiled. “Yes, it’s been a long week. I’m a little tired.”

Beth smiled. Her dainty foot tapped the air. It was such a beautiful night she had slipped off her shoes and her manicured feet were bare on the warm concrete.

“There’s a long weekend coming up, why don’t you take next Friday off and go visit your family for a while?”

“Hmm,” Kirsten pondered the idea. She had to admit she hadn’t thought of it herself.

“That’s a good idea. I might just do that.” It would be great to see her parents and her sisters again. She needed to get away, sort out her thoughts and emotions with everything that had happened over the past several weeks. She liked being here; loved looking after Sarah, but it was probably time to have a break away. “Thanks, Beth.”

“Hey, don’t mention it. I thought I might take Sarah away for a few days, and Craig wants to get away to visit his daughter.” Beth turned to Tyler. “What about you, sugar, you got anything planned?”

Tyler gave a sassy smile and ran a hand through his dark hair. “Well, if you’re all going to be away I might have a party.”

Kirsty laughed as Beth frowned in disapproval. “You’re just a big kid aren’t you?”

Tyler placed his hand over his chest in defense. “Me?”

“Yes you.” Beth cuffed him over the ear as she stood up.

“I’ll have you know I work very hard.” Tyler pouted. “So when I get the chance to play I make the most of it.”

“I know you do, honey.” Beth kissed him on the top of his head. “On that note, I’m going to go and catch up on some paperwork. See you two tomorrow.”

“Okay.” Tyler smiled at his mother then winked at Kirsten. “Just remember, you’ll be old when you wake up.”

Kirsten giggled. “Good night, Beth.”

Beth ignored Tyler’s smart comment and disappeared into the house. The sky had paled to a dim grey glow in the west. She could see Tyler watching her, his face highlighted only by the sallow light drifting through the lounge curtains. A large moon was coming up over the hills behind the house. Kirsten took a deep breath of fresh air. “God, it’s beautiful tonight.”

Tyler grinned. “Yeah, I was just thinking that. And the night’s not bad either.”

Kirsten smirked and looked sideways at him. “Your mother’s right. You are terrible.”

“Hey, I say what I mean and I mean what I say. What’s so wrong with that?”

“Nothing I guess.” Kirsten shrugged. “But sometimes I think there’s more to you than meets the eye. Don’t you ever just feel like not being happy?”

Tyler scowled, as if he had no concept of what she meant. “What’s the point in dwelling on the negative?”

Kirsten remembered Brook’s thoughts on Tyler’s inability to deal with what had happened to them with their father. Did he really think it was that simple? Was it really

just a matter of not dwelling on the negative? Surely something like that was not so easy to put away forever. She wanted to ask him about it, felt sure he would open up to her, but she had no way of telling him how she knew, without revealing her secret sessions with Brook’s diary.

Instead she said, “Sometimes negative things happen that are out of our control.”

“Yes, that I’ll agree with. But it’s all in how we deal with them that matters. We make the most of what we’ve got, and protect what’s ours.”

Kirsten could tell he was quite passionate on the subject by the tone of his voice. Was he talking about his sister? Had he thought he had to be strong for her, not show his own true feelings to protect her?

He stood up now, pushed his chair back so it scraped noisily on the concrete.

“Anyway, I’m going to have a shower. Have a good night. I hope you’re feeling better tomorrow.”

“Thanks.” She smiled up at him. “Goodnight, Tyler.”

She sat in the still of the night. A Morepork began to squawk its lonely call from the native bush surrounding the bay. A soft warm breeze blew across her face and she closed her eyes, enjoying the silence. She couldn’t miss the busy bustle of the city after this. How could she ever go back to living there, having been in a paradise like this?

She was so lucky. She got up and walked down the steps, onto the grass and across the lawn. As she crept away from the lights of the house, into the darkness she heard a soft voice call out to her.

“Hey, pretty lady, where you going?”

She smiled, stopped and turned. Jamie was walking down the hill toward her.

“It’s so nice I thought I’d go for a stroll.”

“You want some company?”

Kirsten grinned up at him. “Of course.”

They walked into the bush and Jamie took her hand into his own. It was pitch black beneath the trees without the light of the moon, but Kirsten had walked the path many times. Her other senses surrounded her, the sound of Jamie breathing, their footfalls on the damp, leaf covered ground, the smell and feel of him beside her. Moonglade glittered on the water as they scrambled over the rocks and down onto the beach. The stones near the jetty were fine pebbles, nearly turned to sand after hundreds of years of being pounded against the shore and the foot round posts, which dug the wharf into the ground. The tide had almost reached its highest point and the water lapped in gentle waves, echoing under the jetty boards.

“God, it’s so beautiful out here,” Kirsten murmured as she dropped Jamie’s hand and spun in a circle, her arms extended wide on either side of her. Jamie caught her and pulled her into him. He smiled down at her. She could see his face clearly under the star filled sky. She frowned. Something was different about him, something she had noticed only now as his silhouette cut a hole in the night sky.

“You’ve had a hair cut.”

Jamie grinned. “What, you only just noticed? I thought women saw these things straight away.”

Kirsten reached her hand up and touched the back of his neck. The hair there was a lot shorter than it had been the week before, razored so it was mere stubble against her fingers.

“I like it.” She smiled.

Jamie leaned in and kissed her on the neck. “Well, I thought I better tidy myself up for you.”

“For me?” Kirsty was pleased he couldn’t see her cheeks turn bright red under the moonlight.

“Maybe,” Jamie confessed as he kissed his way down her neck to the pale skin of her collarbone.

She closed her eyes and craned her head back, leaned her body into him to counteract her balance.

“If you keep that up you’ll be in big trouble, mister,” she whispered.

“Oh, what kind of trouble?” Jamie straightened and peered down at her. A small smile played at the edge of his mouth. Tiny dimples creased his cheeks and he batted his long eyelashes daringly at her.

She laughed. “Big trouble.”

“Sounds good.” Jamie took a step back from her and began to unbutton his shirt.

“Shall we swim first?”

“Swim?” Surprised, Kirsten glanced down at the water’s edge. It looked so nice, but so dark. She had enough trouble going into the green depths during the day, knowing there were stingrays and jellyfish, let alone venturing into the black abyss at night.

“Yeah, swim. Haven’t you ever been skinny dipping at night?” Jamie grinned as he threw his shirt over a large jagged rock.

“No, I can’t say I have.” Kirsten swallowed hard as she glanced at the water. It did sound inviting, especially if Jamie was going to be with her, naked. “What about sharks and stingrays?”

Jamie chuckled. “I’ll protect you. Come on, it will be fun.” He stepped closer to Kirsten and reached to unbutton her shirt. The thought of being so close to Jamie, under the moonlight, in the cool water, soon outweighed the fear, and she quickly undressed and followed him into the sea. She waded in up to her hips, her breath catching as the cool salty water caressed her skin. Jamie came to her and slipped one arm around her waist, kissed her softly. Her nipples hardened against him as the water lapped against her inner thighs. Jamie put one arm under her legs and lifted her into a cradle position then grinned as he carried her all the way into the water. She gasped as he ducked down under the gentle waves, submerging them both up to their necks.

“Shit, it’s cold!” She put her arms out, floated away from Jamie as he watched her and laughed.

“It’s not that bad.” Jamie stood up and waded out further into the bay, his body only visible from the chest up over the water line. He wet both hands and ran them through his hair, pushed it back against his head into damp thick strands. He looked so amazing, the outline of his body glistened with water which caught the moonlight in little droplets. It ran from his hair, down his neck, over his shoulders and onto his chest. His demure pose was so arousing to Kirsten at that moment, the way he stood so relaxed and unaware of the effect he had on her. She waded out past him and swam, doggy paddle, out to the end of the jetty. She looked back at him as she treaded water, concentrated on keeping herself afloat. He waded as far as he could then pushed himself under the water, disappeared beneath the surface, leaving just a ripple on the surface where he had been. Kirsten waited for him to resurface. She turned herself in the water, stared down into the darkness, but couldn’t see him. He was playing with her, waiting until she had no idea where he would come up, and then he would surprise her. She looked around, at the huge moon that hung in the crystal, star studded sky. The outline

of the hills broke into black flowing lines along the horizon, leading down to the sea, now a blanket of silver crested dark green. This was paradise. This was living. Kirsten smiled. If she could do this here, with Jamie, for the rest of her life, she would be happy. The water rippled beside her and Jamie’s head broke the surface. He popped up, splashed her with water and she squealed in delight.

“Nearly lost you there for a second.” He grinned.

“It’s so dark down there, I’m not surprised.”

“You look like a mermaid out here in the water,” Jamie teased.

“Oh, and just how many mermaids have you seen on your travels?”

“Only a few.” He smiled and pushed himself onto his back, paddled circles around her in the water.

“I see, so what are mermaids like then?”

“They’re pretty frisky creatures actually.” He winked. “They do this little thing with their tails-,” Jamie paused.

“Ah, you’re a shocker.” Kirsten pushed her hand through the water, forced a salty wave over his face.

He shook the water off and grinned, swam toward her. He put one arm around her waist and as they moved together in the water he kissed her. His lips were wet, warm and salty. Her hands found his shoulders and she opened her mouth, felt his tongue against her own.

“Have you ever had sex in the ocean?” he asked.

“Uh-uh.” Kirsten shook her head, smiled.

“Well, I would have been surprised if you’d said yes.”

“Why?” Kirsten asked. “Do you think I’m a prude?”

“No.” Jamie smiled. “But any guy who can get it up out here deserves a damn medal. It’s far too cold for that.”

Chapter 11

Saturday was a grey day, overcast and sullen. Kirsten woke late. During the night the temperature had dropped and she had pulled her feather duvet up around her neck, snuggled down in its heavy warmth.

Now she pushed the blankets back, crept from the bed and stretched before the window as she surveyed the weather.

What a crap day for Beth’s birthday, she thought as she watched the sea. It was a horrible muddy colour today, blowing in on choppy waves to the shore. Sea spray washed across the bay like sheets of rain, the wind forcing it to white peaks. Kirsten screwed up her nose in disapproval and went to have a shower. When she arrived downstairs she found Tyler in the kitchen with Craig. The older man was busy preparing vegetables for dinner. Rows of carrots, potatoes, kumara and broccoli lined the marble top bench.

“Wow, you’ve been busy.” Kirsten pulled a carton of milk from the fridge.

“I think he’s feeding an army tonight.” Tyler sat at the table, one leg crossed over the other. Although it was a cool day he wore a thin pair of white cotton shorts and a polo shirt.

“God, aren’t you cold?” Kirsten walked to the bench and took down a cup, poured hot water from the jug over a teabag and added a teaspoon of sugar. Tyler grinned. “Nope. I’m hot blooded baby, I don’t feel the cold.”

Craig looked up, smiled and said, “Yeah, right.” He winked at Kirsten, who pretended to stick a finger down her throat and made a loud gagging sound.

“Hey, you can laugh now,” Tyler started. “But you just wait for winter and then see who you run to for warmth.”

Kirsten smiled. “That’s why I have woolly underwear.”

“Oh, very sexy,” Tyler said in his best effeminate voice. He continued to mop up egg yolk with the remains of bacon scattered on his plate. Beth burst into the kitchen as Kirsten sat next to Tyler at the table.

“God that man infuriates me!” The solid oak door slammed against its frame. Everyone looked at her, unsure of what to say. It was obvious she was referring to Jamie. Who else could get her hackles up like this?

“What’s up, Mum?” Tyler raised one eyebrow quizzically. It made him look somewhat like a young Magnum PI without the moustache.

“He’s not doing it for Sarah. He’s doing it just to piss me off.” She slammed the leather bound diary she was carrying onto the table in front of Tyler. Kirsten jumped, but Tyler seemed unfazed by it all, as if it were an everyday occurrence. Craig seemed to know better than to say anything. He shrank nervously into the corner, concentrating on what he was doing, as if he hoped she wouldn’t notice him at all.

“What?” Tyler put his hand on his mother’s arm, but she shook it off impatiently.

“He’s taking Sarah down to that bloody farm to go riding.”

“Horse riding?” Tyler’s expression mirrored the concern in his voice.

“No, pig riding. Yes of course horse riding. Why else would I be so upset?” She stomped to the fridge, ripped down the story Sarah had posted there. Magnets spilled to the floor and bounced over the varnished boards. One hit the cupboard, came to a stop,

while the other disappeared under the fridge and rattled around. Beth whirled back to Kirsten. “This is your fault.” She pointed a finger at her in accusation. Kirsten was stunned. She didn’t know what to say. Tyler looked at her in remorse then glared back at Beth.

“Mum, how can you say that?” he growled.

“You come in here and try to change things. Now look what he’s done,” Beth cried tearfully.

“Beth, I-,” Kirsten started.

“I don’t want to hear it!” Beth yelled as she turned and stormed from the kitchen, disappearing just as quickly as she had entered.

Tyler’s chair toppled and crashed to the floor as he jumped to his feet. “She’s a damn firecracker this morning. I better go see if I can settle her down.”

“No, Tyler, let me.” Kirsten got up and put her hand on Tyler’s arm. He looked down at her, concerned.

Craig, who was now brave enough to join in the conversation, said, “Are you sure that’s wise?”

Kirsten forced a smile. “Yes. After what she just said I think I’m probably the best one to go. She needs to get it off her chest.” She looked at Tyler and Craig, who were both watching her as though she had volunteered to enter the lions den at feeding time. She left them dumbfounded and went in search Beth.

She wondered what had possessed Jamie to suddenly take Sarah horse riding. After what he had said about Brook, Kirsten thought it would be the last thing he would let his daughter do. Brook had been killed doing just that, so how could he so blithely let Sarah get on a horse? Was it in fact something to do with Kirsten? Had she said something to him to inadvertently change his whole way of thinking? Maybe Beth was right. In a roundabout way maybe this was her fault.

Kirsten knocked on Beth’s bedroom door. There was no answer but as she waited she could hear Beth’s footfall on the carpet. She stepped back as the door swung open. Beth looked surprised to find it was Kirsten who had come to tame the wild beast. Her brow was furrowed; her lips pursed as she mopped a solitary tear from her cheek, glared at Kirsten and tried to maintain her hard exterior.

“It’s my birthday, I’m supposed to be happy,” she fumed. Kirsten smiled. “I know. Can I please come in?”

“Alright.” Beth took a step back and let Kirsten walk into the finely decorated master bedroom. Then she closed the door behind them. “I’m surprised you’d come anywhere near me at the moment.”

Kirsten crossed to the two-seater couch by the window and perched herself on one end. “Well, I’m not taking what you said personally. I think you’re probably right. I possibly am to blame. But I happen to think it’s a good thing, regardless of what you may think.”

Beth opened her mouth to retort, but Kirsten cut her off.

“Beth, Sarah has changed so much since I’ve been here. She loves going to school. Don’t you see the changes in her for the better?”

Beth dropped her gaze and stared at the floor. “We’re not talking about her school work here. My daughter was killed while riding a horse and now my granddaughter is off doing the same thing.”

“Don’t you think Jamie has thought about that? Brook was his wife, and Sarah is his daughter. He won’t have made this decision lightly.”

“Did you know he was taking her?” Beth asked as she lifted her gaze back to Kirsten. Kirsten shook her head. “No, I didn’t. I knew Sarah wanted to go. She talked to me about it, pestered me in fact. But it certainly wasn’t my decision to make. You’d already made yourself clear on that point.”

Beth sneered. “You make me sound like a prison warden.”

“No, I don’t think you’re anything like that. You’re a protective grandmother who wants the best for her family. And I know you’re scared about losing her too, but she’s not Brook. She’s with Jamie. He’s not going to let anything happen to her.”

“That’s what I thought about Brook too,” Beth said with remorse. “She was with Tyler. It was just a horse ride. But I remember what it felt like when her horse came home without her. Tyler loved Brook, he took care of her, almost too much, but when it came to the crunch he couldn’t keep her safe. All it takes is one freak accident and that life is gone.”

Kirsten got up from the couch, put her arms around the older woman and hugged her tightly.

“I know this is hard for you. I can’t say I’ve been through it because I haven’t lost anyone that close to me. But think about it from Sarah’s point of view. Why should she miss out on all the wonderful things she wants to do because her mother died? It’s like punishing her for something she didn’t even do.”

Beth sighed and pulled away from Kirsten. She plucked a tissue from the box on the duchess and dabbed her eyes.

She shook her head. “I know you’re right. I do.” She gazed back at Kirsten. “But I’m not the only one to blame here. Jamie just announced it like it was the most casual thing in the world. Like hey, I’m taking Sarah to get her head chopped off, you wanna come watch? ”

Kirsten couldn’t help but laugh at Beth’s impersonation of her son in law. Beth too, seemed to lighten at the joke she had made and smiled.

“Well, I can’t speak for Jamie. That’s something you have to work out with him. Maybe he thought it was the only way to do it. He would have known you didn’t agree.”

“Damn right he knew.” Beth frowned.

“Don’t you think he has the right to make decisions which affect Sarah?”

Beth smiled. She looked sideways at Kirsten but didn’t say a word. The older woman wouldn’t admit it verbally, but Kirsten could see she knew it was right. It was a decision which was rightfully Jamie’s to make.

“Hey, happy birthday by the way.” Kirsten grinned.

Beth pretended to look stern, but couldn’t hide her pleasure. “Thank you,” she replied. Kirsten moved toward the door. “Don’t let this ruin your day, Beth. Just let it go. There’s nothing you can do about it now. When she comes back all excited and you see the joy on her face you’ll wonder why you ever made such a fuss.”

“I guess you’re right.” Beth balled up the tissue and threw it into the plastic bin beside the door. She smiled. “But don’t you dare tell anyone I admitted that.”

Kirsten laughed as she pulled the door open and stepped into the hallway. “Okay I won’t.”

“Kirsty, I’m sorry I went off at you before. My mouth tends to run away before I put my brain in gear.”

“Ah forget it.” Kirsten waved her hand in dismissal. “I already have.”

Beth smiled. “Well let’s get on with the day then shall we? Would you humour an old lady and play a game of tennis?”

Kirsten laughed. “As long as you don’t expect me to let you win because it’s your birthday.”

“Ah well,” Beth replied, “the day you beat me is the day I’ll know I am getting old.”

True to her word Beth was an exceptional tennis player. She had competed through her teenage years and into adulthood, giving locals a run for their money wherever she went. Even though she wasn’t a Wimbledon star today, she put Kirsten through her paces on the asphalt.

Wiping her forehead after the fifth game Kirsten was pleased the day was overcast. Her boss had just whipped her ass four games to one. Her mood now quite improved after giving someone a complete thrashing, Beth had gone off to have a swim with Tyler.

Kirsten took a long drink of water from a sipper bottle as she walked back to the house, drenched in sweat. As she reached the back door she heard a vehicle approach, so she waited to see who had arrived. Jamie’s car came into sight, down the long driveway and into the car port behind the house. Sarah waved excitedly from the passenger seat, only just able to see over the dashboard. Kirsten smiled, waved back and waited for her to untangle herself from the seat belt. She climbed down from the dusty diesel vehicle.

“Kirsty, Kirsty,” she yelled as she crossed the path to the house, little orange and yellow stones flying up from under her feet. “I went to Lacey’s and she has four horses, and I went riding.” Her words tumbled out one on top of the other. She was so excited. Kirsten grinned and hugged Sarah. “Wow, that’s so cool.” She looked up and smiled at Jamie as he approached, keys jangling in one hand. He looked rather windswept and dashing in tight black moleskins over leather lace up boots, and a green shirt which offset the colour of his eyes. “What kind of horses does she have?” She averted her gaze back to Sarah.

Sarah danced on the concrete path behind the kitchen. “She has one grey pony called Misty and a black pony called Chaps. They’re both the same size. I had a ride on Chaps, he’s fat and Lacey’s dad said he needs to go on a diet, but I liked him. He has long eyelashes and when Lacey puts the saddle on him he puffs his tummy out and tries to bite her on the bum.” Sarah put her hand over her mouth and giggled through her fingers, hardly able to contain her excitement.

Kirsten laughed. “Did Dad go riding too?”

Sarah looked at her father and smiled. “No. He’s too big to ride the ponies. He could have ridden Tommy, he’s a-,” she paused and frowned. “What is he dad?”

“An Appaloosa, honey.”

“That’s right. He’s too big for me to ride, but Lacey said one day she’ll be able to ride him. They have another Appaloosa,” she slowed right down on the name, as if she hadn’t quite mastered it yet, “but she’s having a foal so nobody is allowed to ride her.”

“Well,” Kirsten said with enthusiasm, “it sounds like you had a fantastic time. Did you fall off?”

Sarah shook her head and looked very pleased. “No, Chaps just walked though. He’s fat and lazy, and Lacey’s dad led me most of the time.”

“Are you going to go again?” Kirsten asked.

“Yeah! If Dad will let me. Maybe you can come next time, Kirsty.”

Kirsten smiled. “Well, I don’t know how to ride, but I’d love to go and see Lacey’s horses if you go again.”

“Cool,” Sarah exclaimed. “Can I go again Dad? Can Kirsty come with us?”

Jamie crossed his arms over his chest. “We’ll see, okay?”

“Yay,” Sarah yelled, as if the answer had been a firm yes. “I’m going to go tell Grammy.”

“She’s in the pool,” Kirsten directed as the girl skipped away toward the house.

“Oh, okay.” She changed her course then stopped before adding, “Can I go for a swim dad?”

“Yes, of course you can. Go get your togs on.”

Sarah ran into the house and disappeared. They could hear her talking to herself as she walked up the stairs. Kirsten laughed and looked at Jamie.

“So, how was it really?” she asked when Sarah was safely out of ear shot.

“God, I was petrified.” Jamie dropped his shoulders but grinned despite the confession. “She has no fear that kid.”

“Well, that’s a good thing I guess.”

“It was so hard standing there watching her climb up on that horse’s back. It was something I never thought I’d be able to do.” Jamie stared wistfully at Kirsten.

“Hey, you did good.” She smiled. “I’d just like you to know that I got in trouble over this, however.”

“You?” Jamie frowned. “Let me guess, Beth?”

“Ah-huh.” Kirsten nodded. “I’m sure you’ll hear all about it too.” She put on a posh English accent as if imitating the Queen. “She was not amused.”

“Well, I’m sorry if you got stuck in the middle of that.”

Kirsten waved her hand in the air, brushed him off. “Ah, I can handle Beth.”

“Oh, I’m sure you can handle pretty much anything.” Jamie stepped forward, placed both hands on her shoulders and kissed her on the forehead.

“Well, at the moment all I want is a nice long bath.” She looked at her watch. “And then it should be just about time for drinks before dinner. I think we’re starting early today.”

“Oh yeah, Beth’s birthday. I guess I have to show up then don’t I?” Jamie grinned.

“Of course.” Kirsten put her hands on her hips.

He groaned. “I really can’t be bothered if she’s going to be grumpy with me.” He looked down at Kirsten. “Are you going to wear those earrings I brought you?”

Kirsten acted blasé but her lips curled into a smile as she said, “I suppose I could.”

“You suppose.” Jamie grinned. His eyes danced like the emeralds he had given her. He traced the outline of her mouth with one finger. She opened her lips and took the tip between her teeth, bit it softly before she moved it away with her hand and wound their fingers together.

“I’ll wear them,” she said. “I better make sure I pick something out that they go with hadn’t I?”

“I was just thinking how stunning you’d look wearing just the earrings, but then I guess that wouldn’t really be appropriate for a party would it?”

“No. But if you want to meet me afterwards I could show you how it looks.”

“Wow,” Jamie breathed. “I’d like that. Just thinking about it gets me excited.” He dropped Kirsten’s hand and laughed. “Stop it.”

“You started it remember.” She smiled then left him standing with his thoughts as she walked to the house. “I’m going to have a bath. I’ll see you later.”

She peeked into the kitchen at Craig on her way past. The heavy door squeaked on its hinges and the heavy set man turned in surprise.

“You need any help?” she asked.

“Hey, kiddo. No I think I’m okay at the moment thanks. I’m just about to sit down and take five. Everything is under control so I can have a few drinks myself tonight.”

Kirsten winked. “Big night planned is it?”

Craig, understanding the implication, grinned then curled up a tea towel and hurled it at Kirsten. She moved her head quickly before it hit and let the door close for protection. She heard a dim thud as the cloth hit, then slid to the floor. Kirsten whistled as she climbed the stairs two at a time. She had only been here a few months, but already she felt her fitness level had increased from all the exercise. Tomorrow she would possibly pay for the bout of tennis Beth had just put her through, so she planned on soaking the tension from her body before it had time to do its worst.

She ran a hot bath, piled high with lavender bubbles. Soft music filled the room as she turned the radio on and the curtains protested against the thin rails as she pulled them shut. This part was purely habit. Being three stories up and having no neighbours within view of the house, privacy was a given, but it made her feel more comfortable closing herself in.

Having soaked for a good thirty minutes she pulled herself from the water, reached for a thick bath towel and dried herself off. She wiped the mirror with the corner of her towel and peered at her image through the steam. She had pulled her hair onto the top of her head with a large plastic clip to keep it out of the water, and she turned to see the curve of her neck, now bare and slender. Her hair never afforded much attention, except for the effort she put into preventing it from turning into a frizzy birds nest on a daily basis. Tonight she decided to style it up into a French twist. As she walked back into the bedroom she noticed something draped over the end of her bed. She frowned, and walked forward to pick it up. It was a dress, made of beautiful jade material, with a haltered neck and flared skirt. A row of diamantes decorated the middle, veering up into a slight ‘V’ under the breasts where the material was gathered to accentuate the waist.

Jamie, she thought to herself as she pulled the padded clothes hanger over her head and turned to the mirror to get an idea of what it would look like on. It was a simple but stunning design and Kirsten smiled as she saw it against her. She hoped it would fit. Quickly she pulled the towel from her body and slipped the dress from its hanger; stepped into it and pulled the straps around her neck into a loose knot. She turned back to the mirror. It sat snugly against her frame as if it had been tailored to fit, the inlaid bra cushioning her breasts perfectly and producing just the right amount of cleavage. The waist accentuated her hourglass figure and the skirt flowed down over her hips in a final flattering detail.

“Wow,” she whispered under her breath. As she twisted, the material fluttered around her calves in soft folds.

How does he always know? She pondered. First it was the earrings, now the dress. When she had commented earlier to Jamie about finding something to go with the earrings she had no idea he would do something like this. He must have already had the dress when they’d had that conversation. She smiled as she thought about it. Wasn’t he a dark horse for being able to keep a straight face over that one? Nothing had given him away at all.

Kirsten delved into the back of the closet and pulled out a pair of black, heeled sandals. She pulled them on, twisted the leather strap around her ankle and clasped it firmly into the tiny buckle on the other side of the shoe.

Going back to the bathroom she applied a little makeup and sprayed her hair into place, then put on the earrings Jamie had given her.

She returned to the full length mirror to examine her final look. She sighed. Never before had she been so happy with the way she looked. She couldn’t have picked a better outfit for herself if she had tried.

Jamie was so full of surprises. She was beginning to understand why Brook had been so in love with him, if this was the way he treated his women. It was very flattering. Kirsten decided it was time to go downstairs for the party. After a final dab of perfume behind the ears she headed out into the hallway. She couldn’t wait for Jamie to see what she looked like.

Chapter 12

Kirsten could almost feel the cloud under her feet as she glided down the stairs. It was amazing how the right outfit could instill such confidence, she mused as she watched her reflection pass in the window. She paused on the second storey landing to see if Jamie or Sarah were still there. When she heard nothing but the steady tick of the antique framed wall clock she continued down to the ground floor. As she rounded the corner to the formal lounge she could see everyone was already present. Craig and Sarah had decorated the room with bright streamers and had hung a large birthday banner over the French doors.

Sarah looked gorgeous in a pink taffeta party dress, white stockings and polished vinyl shoes to match. Her blonde hair had been washed and pulled back into pigtails with two cerise ribbons.

Beth wore a stunning two piece pant suit in vivid blue, and Tyler had donned a burgundy silk shirt and black dress pants. He looked extremely handsome, his dark hair brushed back in place. Even Craig had scrubbed up for the occasion, wearing a casual brown suit and an open collared shirt.

But her attention was for Jamie, who had also showered and changed. He now wore a pair of tan dress pants and a linen vest over a long sleeved black t-shirt. She smiled as he turned. Everyone looked as she entered the room and she waited for a glance of appreciation from Jamie. But what she got told an alternative story. Puzzled, she stared at him. Her stomach lurched as she realised his face had drained of all colour, as if she were an apparition of the dead.

She heard Tyler in the background as he whistled in appreciation, but was equally astonished as Beth gasped, her hand clutched fearfully to her chest. Something was wrong; terribly wrong. What was it?

“Jamie?” she questioned.

“You look stunning. ” Tyler seemed to be the only one smiling as he stepped forward. Kirsten glanced at him, confused for a moment.

“Is that-?” Beth’s fingers were shaking so much she had to put her drink down. It clunked heavily onto the table and almost toppled over. Jamie’s face was stone, unreadable. His eyes seemed lifeless as he spoke in a low tone, finishing Beth’s sentence in a deathly tone, “Brook’s dress.”

Kirsten’s heart flipped in her chest as she realised her devastating mistake.

“You look so pretty.” Sarah, unaware of what was unfolding, ran forward and smiled at Kirsten.

“Jesus Christ where did you get that?” Beth spat in an uncontrolled blather. She seemed almost hysterical.

“I-,” Kirsten started. She stared down at herself, suddenly feeling sick to the stomach. Her mind raced as she tried to grasp what had gone so wrong. One minute she was on top of the world, feeling a million dollars in the new outfit Jamie had bought her and the next she was wearing a dead woman’s dress. How had this happened? If Jamie hadn’t given her the dress then who had?

The room began to spin and her vision swam, making her feel giddy. She clawed at the dress with her hands, suddenly wanting to be somewhere else; anywhere but here, standing in front of Jamie wearing his dead wife’s clothing.

Jamie turned away, unable to look at her. She wanted to speak but her mind wouldn’t focus, couldn’t find the words.

“Kirsten,” Beth said uneasily as she moved forward. Her voice seemed to be coming through a thick fog down a dark tunnel. Kirsten could barely make her out through the haze. As her head swung round the room turned grey and she felt her body falling. There was nothing she could do. Everything faded to black as she collapsed onto the floor.

When she came to Beth was hovering over her, her pale face looking frail and full of concern.

“There you are, honey.” She wiped Kirsten’s face with a cold cloth. “Kirsty, can you hear me?”

“Mmm,” Kirsten groaned as she squirmed on the floor. Her legs lay at an odd angle and were beginning to cramp.

“You fainted, its okay, lie still for a minute.”

Kirsten could hear Sarah crying. She turned her head and could see that Jamie had taken Sarah out onto the patio. She could tell he was listening to Beth, but he wouldn’t look in their direction.

“Beth?” Kirsten looked up as a tear rolled down her cheek and plopped onto the carpet beneath her.

“Yes?” Beth placed her hand softly on Kirsten’s forehead. Kirsten whispered loud enough for only Beth to hear. “Get me out of this dress.” Her whole world had caved in. She felt humiliated and alien lying on the lounge floor. Understanding, Beth called, “Craig, help me will you?”

Tyler stepped forward into Kirsten’s line of sight. “I’ll help.”

Beth whipped her head round at her son and gave him a sharp look of disapproval. “I think you’ve done enough for one night.”

With that one statement Kirsten knew what had happened. Tyler had left her the dress; slipped it onto her bed while she had been taking a bath. But why? What motive did he have for wanting her to make a fool of herself in front of everyone? And why had he seemed so pleased with the way she looked?

Craig appeared by Beth’s side, and with little effort scooped Kirsten from the floor, cradled her into his warm arms. Kirsten nuzzled into his neck, hid her face from view as they walked out of the room.

They took the service elevator to the third floor and Beth met them on the landing.

“You can put me down now.” Kirsten said as Craig pushed her bedroom door open.

“Are you sure, on your feet?” Craig asked.

Kirsten nodded. “Ah-huh, I’m okay.”

“Hang on, honey. I’ll just get your shoes.” Beth unbuckled her sandals and cast them onto the floor under the window. Then Craig placed her onto her feet.

“I’ll leave you to it.” Craig left the room and pulled the door closed behind him.

“Beth, I’m so sorry, I had no idea.” Kirsten blinked in despair. She felt like such a victim as she remembered how Beth and Jamie had stared in disbelief.

“Where did you think the dress came from?” Beth demanded in a puzzled tone. Of course to someone who didn’t know the history between Kirsten and Jamie it would be an obvious question. A dress just magically appears from nowhere; wouldn’t you wonder where it came from?

Kirsten found her robe in the wardrobe and pulled it over her shoulders. Then she released the dress tie from around her neck and yanked it down from her waist. It fell into a limp pile around her ankles. She sighed. She wasn’t ready to tell Beth everything.

“I’m the victim here remember.” Her defenses engaged in low gear as she reminded Beth who the culprit was. “I should be asking you what you know about it. This was Tyler’s doing wasn’t it?”

“Yes it was,” Beth conceded. “But for heavens sake don’t ask me what his motivation was. I’ve yet to find that out.”

“Oh I’ll be asking him the same question, don’t you worry about that.” Kirsten folded her arms across her chest and scowled.

Beth pursed her lips. “Well what a wonderful night this turned out to be.” She sounded deflated, disappointed and a little angry.

Kirsten slumped onto the bed, emotions getting the best of her as a new torrent of tears escaped and ran tracks of mascara onto her cheeks.

“I’m so sorry, Beth,” she sobbed.

“Oh no honey, I didn’t mean it was your fault.” Beth lowered herself onto the bed and put an arm around Kirsten’s shoulders. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel worse.”

Kirsten wiped the flood away with the sleeve of her robe and sniffed.

“Why don’t you get changed and come downstairs, I’m sure we can forget this happened.”

Kirsten was horrified. She couldn’t imagine showing her face, en masse, again this early. She shook her head. “No, I can’t, Beth. You go, I’ll be fine.”

“I never thought I’d use this analogy but you know you’re supposed to get right back on the horse don’t you.” Beth attempted a smile to try and lighten the mood.

“In this case I don’t think so.” Kirsten sighed. “I think I’ve done enough damage for one night.”

Beth stood up. “Well if you’re okay I really must get back downstairs, before those two go head to head.”

Kirsten knew immediately who she was referring to. But she doubted Jamie would do anything until Sarah was safely out of the way. She was already upset by what had happened, the poor girl. She was Jamie’s priority and he wouldn’t cause a scene in front of her.

“Yes you go, Beth. I’m fine, really.” She fixed her boss with a convincing stare.

“Okay dear, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

With Beth gone Kirsten swung her legs onto the bed and stretched out, closed her eyes against the light. She still couldn’t believe what had just happened. How could she have been so caught up in Jamie that this huge misfortune had slipped past her guard? If she had paid more attention surely she could have picked up that something was incredibly wrong with the situation. Couldn’t she?

Kirsten still couldn’t believe that Tyler would do something like this. Was this still about Brook? Was he so twisted and bitter about Jamie that he would use Kirsten so blithely against him? Did he somehow know about her relationship with Jamie? It was the only way he could have expected she would simply put the dress on without asking any questions. He had to know she would assume it was there for a reason. Later, after she had rested she would seek out the answers. But for now her head pounded louder than any thought that invaded her mind. Kirsten closed her eyes and let her body drift away into sweet oblivion.

* * * *

The cold woke her several hours later. She shivered as she sat up, pulled her robe around her as she blinked in the dark. Disoriented for only a moment, she remembered the events leading up to her sleeping on top of the blankets. Her heart sank. Jamie. What had she done?

She pulled herself up and walked to the bathroom, clicked on the tiny fluorescent light above the mirror. She took the pins from her hair and let it fall around her shoulders, wiped the black bags of makeup from under her eyes and stared at her forlorn image in the glass.

She had to find Jamie to make sure he was okay. Earlier they had been so cheerfully discussing the possibility of him joining her after the party, and now she felt completely abandoned. Not surprisingly things had gone awry between them. What could she expect? She had gaily slipped into a dead woman’s dress and presented herself to him. He wouldn’t know what she had assumed. Right now he probably thought she was just as much the villain as Tyler was. She had to set him straight, make him aware that none of this had been her doing.

Kirsten padded barefoot down the stairs to the second floor. The house was dark and still. She glanced at the clock as she passed. It was just after eleven. She wondered if anyone was still up. Carefully she picked her way down into the bowels of the house, crept silently through the lounge, abandoned hours ago. A sliver of light seeped from under the kitchen door, Kirsten could see it as she weaved her way past the furniture in the dining room. The divine aroma of Craig’s cooking lingered and Kirsten’s stomach growled, reminding her she had skipped dinner. But the sound of raised voices from behind the solid oak door stopped any thoughts she had of placating her appetite right now. She could hear Jamie in muffled tones, his voice raised in anger. She pushed open the door and the bright halogens of the kitchen blinded her for a moment before she could focus. Jamie had Tyler up against the far wall, pinned by the neck with one large hand. His face was a picture of pure hate, his stature one of a man who was not about to back down. He had already struck Tyler at least one blow, the left side of his face was split open, his eye already swollen shut as blood trickled over one purple cheek. Tyler gagged for breath as Jamie continued to clasp him firmly, the fresh adrenaline in his veins spurring him into a blind rage.

“Jamie!” Kirsten screamed as she closed the gap them in mere seconds. She clawed at Jamie’s arm. She knew physically she would not be able to pull him off the smaller man, but luckily the sound of her voice interrupted his onslaught. He let go of Tyler, who instantly put his own hands up to his neck and slumped against the wall. There were large red indents on his throat where Jamie’s fingers had been.

Jamie took a step back and glared at Kirsten, his own breath coming in short raspy gulps.

“Jesus, Jamie, you were going to kill him.” Kirsten blurted before she had time to think.

“It’s what the bastard deserves,” Jamie said far too calmly for Kirsten’s liking. She looked into his eyes, saw something extremely unnerving there. If she hadn’t come into the room when she had, Tyler would quite possibly be dead before morning. Right now

she needed to get Jamie away from Tyler. Despite anything that had happened, Tyler didn’t deserve to die, especially by Jamie’s hand.

“Nothing is worth that.” Kirsten stepped in between the two men, pushed Jamie back toward the door as she tried to break his intense stare from the man lying broken on the floor. “Jamie?” She put her hand up to his face, forced his gaze down to her own. The haze seemed to clear and Jamie looked almost remorseful, as if it just dawned on him what had happened. “You need to go.” Kirsten pointed to the door and without a word Jamie turned and pushed through the door to the back hallway. He disappeared into the dark before the wooden panel closed with a dull thud behind him.

“Tyler, are you okay?” She turned and crouched beside his limp form. Tyler opened his mouth to say something but the only thing that escaped from his crushed windpipe was a croaky groan.

“Come on let’s get you up.” Kirsten pushed her own weight under his armpit, forced his arm around her neck and hoisted him to his feet. The faint smell of whiskey wafted over her as she helped him to a chair by the window. She crossed to the fridge and pumped a cold glass of water from the chiller then opened the freezer, found a small packet of frozen peas and wrapped them into a tea towel. Going back to the table she pressed this against Tyler’s cheek bone. He winced as the makeshift icepack touched his skin.

“Ow,” he managed to get out through clenched teeth.

“Here drink some water, it should help.” Kirsten handed him the glass and he sipped it cautiously, his face contorted in pain as he swallowed. She sat in the chair opposite him, pulled it closer and crossed her legs to the side so she could still hold the ice pack against his face. Her robe slipped so she grabbed it quickly and stuffed it between her knees to hold it in place. She stared at Tyler, lost for words. She was so mad at him for what he had done earlier, but now he just seemed so pitiful she couldn’t feel anything but sorry for him.

“Damn you, Tyler Frampton,” she muttered. “You are nothing but trouble.”

“Thank you,” Tyler forced out in a whisper. Then he cleared his throat, took another gulp of water and his voice seemed to come back. “If you hadn’t come along God knows what would have happened.”

“Oh, I know what would have happened,” Kirsten said with authority. “Jamie would have killed you.”

“Hey I was half tanked. He had an advantage.” Tyler tried to make light of the situation but he knew how serious it had been. He clunked his empty water glass onto the table.

Kirsten scowled. “And a better motive. I have half a mind to thump you myself. In fact I still might,” she paused, “when your face heals from this lot.” She took Tyler’s hand and placed it over the icepack, replacing her own. “Hold this for a moment. I have to get the first aid kit.”

“No, I don’t need that.” Tyler grabbed her arm with his free hand.

“Yes you do.” She yanked her arm free and stood up. She felt Tyler’s eyes on her and she tugged her robe tighter around herself. It had been poor judgment on her part to wander round the house at night wearing only her robe and a thin pair of panties. She left Tyler and ventured out into the hallway, wound her way past the staircase to the downstairs bathroom. She didn’t see Jamie sitting on the stairs until he spoke.

“Is he okay?” His voice was deep and low, with no emotion. He stood up as Kirsten stopped.

“Jamie,” she said with a fright.

“Is Tyler okay?”

“Yes. Or at least he will be.” Kirsten moved toward Jamie. She could just see his face under the dim moonlight filtering through the narrow pane of glass at the base of the stairs.

“I just wanted to make sure.” Jamie moved back as Kirsten came closer. “I’m going to bed now.”

Kirsten frowned. “Jamie, don’t you want to talk about this?”

“Talk about what?” He sounded tired and annoyed.

“About what happened tonight,” she started. “I know you’ve certainly had it out with Tyler.” There was a hint of conceit in her voice as she finished the sentence. She couldn’t understand why Jamie was acting so blasé about the whole thing. “Don’t you want to hear my side of the story?”

“I don’t know, do I?” He dug both hands deep into his pockets.

“You must know none of it was my fault. I had no idea where the dress came from. I thought you had put it there.”

“Jesus Christ, Kirsty. If that was the case then why didn’t you come and ask me?”

Jamie ran a hand through his golden hair in frustration.

“Why would I?” Kirsten raised her voice a notch. She couldn’t understand why Jamie thought any of this was her fault. “And what do you mean if? You don’t believe me?”

“I don’t know what to believe right now,” Jamie said through clenched teeth as if he were accusing her of something.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

Jamie sighed. “Look I don’t want to talk about it with you now. I need to get my head around everything first.” He flashed a look of contempt at Kirsten. “Besides you’re rather preoccupied with Tyler right now.”

“Jamie, that’s not fair.” Hurt trembled in her voice. “You just about killed the man. Somebody has to look after him.”

“Oh and how convenient that it has to be you.”

Kirsten flared, “God the two of you are so infuriating. Maybe I should have just let you kill each other.” She turned and walked away from Jamie, so frustrated that he was in this frame of mind and not willing to listen to her side of the story. When she came back from the bathroom Jamie had disappeared. Tyler however, was still in the kitchen, feeling sorry for himself. He looked up and smiled warily as she came into the room. He looked as though he were perched on the edge of the chair, ready in case he had to make a quick exit. Kirsten smiled. “What, did you think I was Jamie coming back to finish you off?”

“Hey, with what just happened wouldn’t you be touchy too?”

Kirsten sighed as she sat down at the table and took the packet of frozen food from Tyler, laid it on the table to assess his face.

“You have my wrath to come, remember,” she teased. It was so hard to be mad at him right now.

“I’m sorry for that,” Tyler murmured. “I honestly didn’t think it would upset so many people. It’s just a dress.”

“Just a dress.” Kirsten stared in disbelief. “Just a-,” she paused. “Tyler you have got to be kidding me.” She took out a bottle of antiseptic, poured some onto a cotton ball and dabbed Tyler’s cheek with it. The strong clinical smell reminded Kirsten of a hospital. Tyler winced and pulled away, but didn’t say anything.

Kirsten shrugged her shoulders. “Well, now that you’ve involved me, you better start giving me some answers. Why your sister’s dress?”

Tyler blinked up at her from under his fringe. “How about a drink first. The face is killing me. I need something to take the edge off.”

Kirsten smiled. “Don’t you think you’ve had enough for one night?”

“Not likely.”

“Answer the question and I’ll get you a drink.”

Tyler grinned. “No wonder you’re a nanny.”

Kirsten glared at him, waited for her answer.

“Okay, okay,” Tyler submitted. “I don’t know why I did it really. It was there, I was thinking about how the place has changed since you’ve been here, like-,” he paused, took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “It feels like it did when Brook was alive. I just wanted to see what you looked like in her dress.”

“So you snuck it into my room. What made you think I’d just put it on?”

“Well you did, didn’t you?” He grinned.

“Tyler answer the question, you know something don’t you?”

Tyler sighed. “Yes, I was counting on the fact you’d think Jamie put it there. I’ve seen the way you two look at each other when you think nobody is watching.”

“You must have realised how Jamie would take it; or me for that matter when I found out.”

“Truthfully I wasn’t thinking about you, or Beth, just Jamie.” There was a bitterness in his voice.

“Tyler, why do you hate Jamie so much?” Kirsten pushed the boundaries. Maybe if he was being honest about this, which she had no reason to disbelieve, he would open up about other things too.

“Hey, I thought it was one question for a drink.” Tyler shifted uneasily in his chair.

“Okay.” Kirsten smiled and walked to the pantry, where she knew Craig had a bottle of brandy stashed for cooking purposes. She poured a double nip over some ice in a crystal tumbler, and then returned to the table.

Tyler didn’t need any further prompting. He offered the answer to her question without hesitation. “Jamie didn’t love Brook. Not like she deserved to be loved.”

“Why do you say that?”

“He was never there for her like I was. I picked up the pieces when we came to New Zealand, looked after her through her counseling, picked her up on the days she couldn’t face anybody. Jamie spent most of his time away. She needed him to be there for her and he wasn’t.”

“Maybe he had his reasons.”

Tyler glared at her. “Don’t defend him Kirsty. You don’t know.”

“Hey, I just don’t like taking sides. I’m trying to be objective. Do you think maybe you’re being a little judgmental, a little biased?” Kirsten put her hand on Tyler’s arm. “I know you loved her, Tyler. She was your sister and she’d been through a lot. I understand that. But despite what you think Jamie did love her.”

“It’s my fault she died,” Tyler said without emotion. It was as if it were the first time he had said the words, like it was a confession. He took a sip of the brown liquid she had provided, and then stared into the bottom of the glass. Kirsten knew they had been riding together when Brook had been killed.

“No Tyler, it wasn’t.” She touched his face, bringing his gaze back to hers.

“Ah-huh.” He nodded. “We got into a fight. I knew she wanted to leave and I was trying to convince her it was the wrong thing to do. She was standing there with tears in her eyes, looking at me like I was the villain. I just wanted her to stay, make her realise she was making a mistake. Jamie was trying to take her away from me.”

Kirsten didn’t know what to say. It was obvious he felt so much guilt over the loss of his sister and it was easier to transfer it into the hate he had for Jamie, than to deal with it himself.

They sat in silence for a few moments before Tyler broke it once again. “I’m sorry, Kirsty. I never meant to hurt you. Despite what you must think, I do like you, and I like having you here. I don’t want to do anything else to upset that.”

Kirsten sighed. “Well then you have to try and get past this thing you have with Jamie. Otherwise the whole family is going to end up in pieces.” She stood up and collected the things together from the first aid kit, admired her handiwork. Tyler’s face wouldn’t need stitches as long as the dressing she had applied held through the night, long enough for the skin to mend itself. “But right now you need to go to bed and rest. I think you’re going to live. Mind you, your face might not be as pretty tomorrow.”

Tyler grinned. “What, you don’t think I need a nurse by my bedside through the night?”

Kirsten clucked her tongue in disapproval. “God loves a tryer, I’ll give you that much.”

Tyler stood up and placed his empty glass on the table. “Thanks, Kirst. I owe you.”

“And don’t you forget it,” Kirsten said with haste.

Tyler laughed.

“Hey, I’m serious. You owe me big time.” She glowered at him under the halogens.

“And when you least expect it I will call that favour in.”

Chapter 13

Kirsten’s priority the next morning was to find Jamie. She needed to find out what had gone wrong between them. It was more than just the dress. She suspected there was a lot more behind what happened between the two men than either of them would let on, and she intended to find out what it was.

But Jamie and Sarah were nowhere to be found when she crept downstairs just after eight.

Craig however was in the kitchen, much to Kirsten’s surprise. He never worked Sundays.

She grinned. “You stayed over didn’t you?”

Craig looked awkward for only a moment before he reflected her smile on his own flushed face. “Maybe.”

“You did!” Kirsten squealed.

Craig grinned. “Well, it’s good to see you back to your old self this morning.”

Kirsten pouted as she moved to the fridge and poured a large glass of milk. “I wouldn’t say back to normal, I’ll feel much better when I’ve spoken to Jamie. Have you seen him this morning?”

“Oh, yeah. He and Sarah were finishing their breakfast when I came in. Sarah said something about going to visit some friends.”

“Damn they’ve gone out?” Kirsten’s frustration was obvious.

“Yep, I heard the car go about ten minutes ago, sorry.”

“Ah it’s not your fault. I just need to talk to him that’s all.” She glanced sideways at Craig. “Have you seen Tyler this morning?”

“No. He was happy getting drunk last time I saw him so I would think he’ll be sleeping in this morning.”

“He was getting more than drunk when I saw him last,” Kirsten said under her breath.

“What?”

Kirsten smiled. “I’m sure you’ll work that one out when you see him.”

Craig dismissed her with a shake of the head and carried on with what he had been doing.

“Well, I promised someone breakfast in bed, so I’ll leave you to it.”

“Don’t let me hold you up then.” With a grin, Kirsten walked through to the lounge, pushed back the heavy curtains and opened the French doors. It was another picture perfect day in the bay, the water like green glass under a cloudless sky. Warmth washed over her as she stepped down onto the patio and lifted her face to the sun. She smiled as she thought about Craig taking breakfast up to Beth. It was so sweet that the two of them had found each other. Beth, despite her sometimes frank and matronly opinions, was a wonderful lady, who deserved to be happy. Kirsten couldn’t think of a better companion for her than Craig, with his nurturing ways and carefree sense of humour. A soft breeze caressed her skin as she sat on the step. With everything that had happened over the last twenty four hours Kirsten was pleased to be going home the following week for a much needed break. Maybe everything had happened a little fast with her and Jamie; some time away from each might be just what they needed. She wondered if Jamie regretted making that first move toward changing the relationship. It

had taken them both by surprise and seemed to have progressed rather fast into something neither of them was sure of.

Tyler made his first appearance for the day around midday. Beth and Craig had disappeared to take a walk before lunch and Kirsten was in the kitchen, trying to decide what her own appetite deserved.

“Morning,” Tyler said casually.

“No, you missed that.” Kirsten looked up and smiled. Despite what he’d been through the previous evening Tyler looked well rested. He sat at the table, while Kirsten put down her butter knife and walked over to see how his face was in the daylight.

“I slept better than I thought I would,” he said as Kirsten removed the dressing over his cut cheek. The skin beneath was purple and swollen, the area under his left eye puffy, but despite the fact it had left a vicious red mark the skin had healed nicely back together.

“Well you’re lucky.” Kirsten discarded the used dressing. “You don’t need stitches.”

“Great. Do I still need my nurse?” He grinned playfully.

“You’re unstoppable,” Kirsten noted with distaste. She pulled the first aid kit across the table and flipped open the lid. “Nothing keeps you down for long does it? I was feeling sorry for you, thinking you’d be a mess this morning, but here you are larger than life again.”

“Hey, I told you once before and I’ll tell you again. There’s no use dwelling on the negative.”

Kirsten could feel his breath on her face as she leaned in to smother his cheek with antiseptic cream. A warm glow emanated from him, as if his internal thermostat ran higher than most. She wondered if he had a fever, but when she felt his forehead it didn’t indicate that was the case.

“Why can’t you apply that theory to you and Jamie?” Kirsten quizzed. Tyler grinned. “Trust you to twist my words around.”

“Not twisting, just observing.” She should have been mad at Tyler still, but the way he was looking at her with those big brown doe eyes and boyish dimpled cheeks made her melt. And yet she wondered if this was all part of his plan. Was he manipulating her still, working her to his advantage in some sick game he was playing with Jamie?

“So where is Captain Heroic today anyway?”

“Off with Sarah somewhere.”

Tyler raised one eyebrow comically. “Oh? I thought he’d be swanning around gloating about his handiwork.”

Kirsten glared at Tyler as she put everything back in the first aid kit and snapped the lid shut. “He’s not like that, Tyler.”

“Oh and you know this how?”

“Look,” Kirsten said sternly, her hands planted firmly on her hips. “I’m not going to be the pawn in your little game so can we just stop it?”

Tyler gave her a tight smug smile. “I think you already are, honey.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

Tyler stood up and crossed to the window, touched his face where Kirsten’s fingers had been. “Why don’t you ask Jamie that question? Don’t you wonder why he’s playing it so cool now? He’s already proven his point. He was able to get to you before I did. He’s won.”

“Don’t be silly,” Kirsten snapped, but her smile faltered. “Jamie’s not like that.”

Tyler turned and smiled, his arms crossed over his chest. “No?”

Kirsten felt the first seed of self doubt grow within. What if she had been played by the wrong person? All this time Tyler was the one she had been weary of but was Jamie really the one playing games? Tyler, although misguided in his actions had always been honest with her. Or had he? Suddenly she was so confused. What was happening here?

How did she know who was telling her the real story?

“Anyway, thanks for looking after me.” Tyler changed the subject as he smiled in appreciation. “But I have to hit the road soon if I’m going to make it back to Blenheim before the restaurant opens tonight.”

“You’re leaving?”

“Hey I can’t let a little bruise get in the way. Life goes on and I have work to do.” He looked down at his gold sports watch, twisted it back into place with his fingers. “I’ll be back on Tuesday night probably with some nets for the farm.”

“Okay. You look after that pretty face won’t you?” She smirked. Tyler shot her a dimpled grin. “Yes nurse.”

* * * *

Jamie arrived home a few hours later. Kirsten was in her room, but she heard Sarah’s shrill voice, greeting Beth down on the patio. She climbed off the bed and wandered out onto the tiny terrace, peered down at them to see if Jamie was with her. When she realised he wasn’t Kirsten ran downstairs to the second floor. Jamie’s door was ajar and she could see him moving inside. She tapped on the door and pushed it open.

“Can I come in?” she asked.

“Sure,” Jamie replied in the emotionless baritone Kirsten was all too familiar with. She sat on the end of the bed, noticed the open bag he was packing.

“You’re going?” she asked, surprised. “Were you planning on talking to me before you left?”

Jamie sighed. “I guess so.”

“You guess so. Jamie, what’s going on?”

“Why don’t you tell me?” Jamie crossed to the wardrobe and began to pull clothes from hangers as if they were the enemy. When he came back to the bed Kirsten took him by the arm.

“Stop, Jamie. Talk to me. Tell me what’s going on.” Her eyes pleaded with him. Why was he acting like this?

“How about you tell me what’s going on,” Jamie said between clenched teeth. “Why is it suddenly I hear all this stuff from Tyler about you? Things that make me start to doubt your motives?”

“What things?” Kirsten’s mind raced. What could Tyler possibly have said to Jamie to make him think so badly of her? Was it more lies?

Jamie’s green eyes flamed with anger as he turned and stared at her. “You wanna tell me about someone called Greg Hamilton?”

Kirsten’s stomach churned at the mention of the name, and she dropped Jamie’s arm as if it had burned her. It was a gut reaction which she immediately regretted. Her own anger flared, but inside she felt guilt for not telling Jamie herself. She had meant to, but the right time had never presented itself. Now Tyler had used it as more ammunition in his sick little game.

“Jesus Christ,” she stammered as she dropped her gaze and crossed her arms across her stomach. “That bastard did it again didn’t he?”

Jamie took a step away from the bed. “So are you saying it’s not true?”

Kirsten looked up at Jamie, unsure of what to say. Just what had Tyler said?

Obviously it had been blown out of proportion to suit his purpose, but he didn’t even know the full story himself.

“It’s not what Tyler would have told you.” Kirsten stated.

“And how do you know what Tyler told me?”

Kirsten was suddenly mad at Jamie. How could he have believed anything Tyler told him, at least without double checking the story with her? He apparently believed whatever he’d been told otherwise he wouldn’t be packing and leaving in such a state.

“Well whatever he said made you think the worst of me,” Kirsten flared as she stood toe to toe with Jamie. “And I can’t believe you just swallowed whatever bullshit he fed you.”

Jamie’s eyes flashed doubt for a moment as he watched Kirsten act in such defiance.

“It’s obviously not bullshit if you’re not denying it,” Jamie defended.

“That would depend entirely on what Tyler said,” Kirsten spat. “Yes, I know Greg Hamilton. I worked for him and his wife for six months. Beyond that there are only two people who know the truth behind what happened while I was in their employ, and Tyler fucking Frampton is not one of them.” Kirsten’s chest pounded as she heaved her wrath at Jamie. She was so wild at him. How could he think these things of her? “And as for you, if you believe a word of what that man says, after everything, then you’re not the man I thought you were. I can’t believe you’re acting like this.”

“Whoa.” Jamie took her by the arm, trying to calm her down. “Then why don’t you tell me what the truth is.”

“It’s a bit late for that isn’t it?” Kirsten wrenched her arm from Jamie’s grasp.

“You’ve already decided what that is.”

“What would you have me think, Kirsty? You sleep with me and then I find out you’ve previously slept with another employer.” Jamie thundered, his face only inches from her own. “What would you think in my position?”

“Well, I might think to actually ask you about it to start with!”

“Fine, I fucked up on that count,” his voice boomed even as he conceded. “So you wanna tell me the real story?”

“I don’t think at this point that I owe you an explanation.” Right now she was beyond reconciliation.

“Fine!” Jamie yelled. “That certainly clears that up.”

“Good, I’m pleased about that,” Kirsten snapped as she turned on her heel and headed for the door. “I’ll let you get on with your packing.”

“Kirsty, wait-,” Jamie started. But it was too late. She pulled the door closed behind her and let it slam shut. She made for the stairs; heard the door open and Jamie’s footsteps behind her. He caught her on the stairs, passed her like a bullet and stepped in front of her, preventing her from climbing any further. They were both out of breath as they stood, staring at each other, chests heaving as though they had just run a marathon.

“Kirsty, I can’t leave it like this.”

Kirsten glared up at him but behind her eyes he saw her pain. “You were quite willing to leave it like this ten minutes ago.”

“I wasn’t thinking clearly. I’m sorry, I over reacted.” He lifted her hand and pressed it to his chest.

“I think you should just go, Jamie.” She fixed him with a blank stare. Inside she was screaming out. She wanted him to take her in his arms, tell her how sorry he was, but outwardly she was too proud to let him in. He would have to stand up to her if he wanted another chance; force her to believe how sorry he was.

“Go, with things like this between us?”

“Why not, you were going to go anyway. If I hadn’t come to see you you’d probably be gone by now,” Kirsten said listlessly. She stared at the buttons on his shirt, unable to meet his gaze.

“That’s not fair,” Jamie said in his defense. “I was going to come and see you before I left.”

“Not fair,” Kirsten attacked him once more. “Let’s talk about what’s not fair shall we?”

Jamie sighed as if in surrender, dropped her hand and ran it instead through his own hair. “We’re going to go round in circles on this one aren’t we? Maybe I should just go.”

Kirsten felt as if her heart had jumped into her throat. She didn’t want him to go. But she wasn’t willing to let him off lightly either. She wanted him to know how upset she was, wanted him to understand how he had hurt her. And she wanted him to really make it clear how sorry he was, how much she meant to him. She needed to know he had been in the right all along, not Tyler.

She bit her lip, waited a moment in case he had something else to say, but he just stood on the stairs, waiting for her reaction.

“Fine,” she said in a bland tone. “Just go.”

“If that’s what you want.” Jamie stepped down so he was level with her. “If you need me I’ll be close to the car. You can get me on the CB. I’m going to the cabin for a few days to paint.”

“Okay.” Kirsten crept up the stairs as his heavy footsteps disappeared back down to the second floor. Tears flowed in a steady stream down her cheeks as she walked to her room and closed the door. She threw herself onto the bed, buried her face in the pillow and sobbed. This wasn’t how it was supposed to end. She should have told Jamie what really happened; made him listen. But her pride had stepped in and her anger at the way he had acted toward her just fuelled that fire.

If only she had told him about Greg Hamilton, it wouldn’t have given Tyler any more ammunition against her. The truth was she had slept with her previous employer, but she had no recollection of doing so.

Chapter 14

Monday arrived on summer wings and Kirsten buried herself in work. Sarah’s mind was on other things too. Wednesday Beth was taking her away on holiday and she was so excited she could hardly concentrate on her school work. The afternoon was humid so they escaped the classroom early and swam in the sea instead. Kirsten had now coaxed Sarah into swimming out past the jetty, where the water at high tide was deeper than both of them put together. The ground there had been dredged away so Tyler’s boat could dock on most tides except the very lowest. She was proving to be a promising swimmer. Her limbs had strengthened and she could hold her breath under water for quite some time. Treading water was no longer an issue for her either. Kirsten was very proud of her protégé.

Today Sarah had grown even more adventurous. She jumped from the end of the jetty, into the deep emerald water below.

When Wednesday rolled around Kirsten began to feel quite depressed. She helped Sarah pack for her trip, knowing that once they had gone she would rattle around in the big empty house on her own until Tyler or Jamie returned. She hadn’t contacted Jamie yet. She really wasn’t sure what she should say to him, save sorry please come home and tell me everything is going to be okay, but she didn’t think that was quite appropriate.

She was furious with Tyler and the feeling grew with each day he didn’t show at the house. There was something about Tyler that niggled at her mind but she had pushed it away until the time was right.

With Beth and Sarah gone in a cloud of excitement Kirsten could now turn her mind to these things. She remembered back to something Craig had told her about Brook. Tyler and his sister had been riding when she had been killed, according to Craig, and she had been hit by a branch and thrown from her horse. However, this conflicted with something Tyler had said to her the other night as she patched his war wounds. Tyler had mentioned the way his sister had looked as they stood together arguing on the day she died. Beth had also mentioned that Brook’s horse had come home without her, which matched what Craig had said, but not what Tyler inferred, unless…

Kirsten thought about it long and hard. Unless it wasn’t a fall from the horse which had caused her death.

She wandered down to the pool house and fished around under the loose boards for Brook’s diary. The pool house was so hot and stuffy that Kirsten took the book back to the patio instead, knowing very well there would be nobody around to interrupt her delving. She flipped through the pages to the last entry she had read and on to where the lazy sloped handwriting stopped. The pages beyond were white and untouched. Kirsten thought sadly that this had been Brook’s last entry before her life had ended so tragically. Would it hold enough clues for her to piece together what had really happened? What had gone so wrong to make Jamie and Tyler into the seething mess they now were?

May 17th

Tomorrow I’ve decided I’m going to tell Jamie everything. I have to get it all off my conscience before it destroys me. I can’t keep protecting Tyler anymore. He has to face

up to what he’s done to us, to me. If Jamie loves me then he’ll understand, and we can start again. If he doesn’t then at least I know where I am and where to go from here. I have to be honest with myself. What Tyler did to me is wrong, I know that now. In some sick way he thinks he’s protecting me, but in reality he’s just continuing what my father started.

Margaret has helped me face my demons and I have to help Tyler work through his. What will happen if he thinks he can control Sarah the same way when she gets older? I just couldn’t bear that happening. It’s going to kill my mother but I have to do it for my own sanity. Besides, I have to know one way or the other who Sarah’s father really is . .

.

Kirsten felt sick as she finished the last sentence. The book dropped from her fingers and fell to the concrete with a dull thud. Never in a million years would it have occurred to her that this was Tyler’s dark twisted secret.

He had been molesting his own sister. That’s why he hated Jamie so much. Jamie was a threat; a normal relationship Brook had found outside their sordid affair. In Tyler’s mind Jamie really had taken Brook away from. And to top that Brook had been terrified her brother may have been the father of her child.

Did Jamie know, was all she could think, over and over. Is that why Jamie was so terrified to take Sarah away from Beth and Tyler, in case Tyler challenged her true parentage? It was the only explanation she could think of which made any sense. As if on cue, Tyler’s vehicle came down through the trees. The brakes protested as Tyler drove the little red machine behind the house and they disappeared from view. Kirsten’s mind raced. This was her chance to talk to Tyler, but where did she start?

She had him alone in the house, but she had to approach him the right way; make him feel like he had to open up to her. She had one major draw card up her sleeve and that was making him feel as though he owed her.

She jumped up from the deck chair and ran through to the kitchen. Opening the door she met Tyler at the back entrance. He looked up in surprise as she flung the door open.

“Well it’s nice to see you missed me.” He smirked.

Kirsten pounced on him. “Good to see your face has healed,” she remarked. Then she lifted her arm and smacked her open palm across his left cheek with all her might. The force made him take a step backward and he put both hands onto the bonnet of the car for support. When he turned back to her the left side of his face had turned a bright shade of red, but in spite of it his mouth curled into a smile. “I guess you warned me about that one.”

Kirsten folded both arms across her chest. “Oh, that’s not the one I owe you. That’s for blurting to Jamie about Greg Hamilton. Next time you decide to tell tales you might want to make sure you get your facts straight.”

“Hey, I already paid for that one, remember? Your boyfriend tried to kill me.”

Kirsten moved to strike him again but he grabbed her wrist with a vice like hand and twisted her arm behind her back. She squealed in fright and he let her go, but right before the remorse flashed Kirsten noticed a look in his eye that frightened her far more than his actions had.

“Why did you say those things, Tyler?” she pleaded with him. Tyler sighed and turned back to the car. “Look, I’ve just got home, I’m tired and I’ve got a lot to do before the day’s out. Can’t we talk about this later?” He opened the back

door of the car and slid a long grey plastic tray from the seat. It had no lid and Kirsten could see it was full of netting, topped with a floatation device.

“Oh no, you’re not getting away that easily. I’ve been waiting three days to have this conversation with you.”

“Whatever,” Tyler said blithely, “but I have to get these nets out to the salmon farm. So if you wanna talk then it will have to be on the water. Are you up for that?” He carried the tray to the back door and dropped it at Kirsten’s feet.

“Of course,” Kirsten said unsurely. It wasn’t the most ideal place in the world to pick a fight with Tyler, but it could work to her advantage. An idea formed in her mind. Yes, maybe this would work. She could kill two birds with one stone. “Just let me get a jacket.”

“A jacket?” Tyler looked at the sky and smirked. “Kirst, it’s thirty degrees out here.”

“Yeah it is now. But God knows how long you’ll be out there and I hate being cold.”

“Fine,” Tyler said in dismissal. “Go get whatever you need. I’ll meet you down at the boat,” He glanced at his watch, “in ten minutes.”

“Okay.” Kirsten ran back inside and took both flights of stairs two steps at a time. Instead of turning right to her own room, she checked to make sure Tyler had not followed her then hung a left and ran down the corridor to his office. She crept across the floor to his desk, feeling somewhat like a trespasser as she made sure the CB radio was set to the correct channel to get Jamie.

She plucked the handset from its cradle and stretched the plastic coated wire out from its coil. She depressed the black call button on the side of the handset and took a deep breath.

“Jamie, are you there?” She let her thumb slip from the call button and waited for his familiar voice to come back to her over the air waves. For a few moments there was only static.

“Jamie?” She tried once more.

Again static, and then, “Kirsty, are you okay?”

She sighed with relief. Her plan may just work yet.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Jamie, listen. I haven’t got much time. I can’t explain right now, but are you going to be near the radio for a while?”

“I’m in the car so yeah, I guess I will be. Is everything okay?”

Kirsten sighed and without pressing the button she whispered, “No.” Everything was upside down and pear shaped, but she would try to put things right somehow. She pressed the button so Jamie could hear her once more. “Jamie, can you promise me you’ll just keep listening?”

“Kirsten, I don’t understand.”

“You will. Just promise me you’ll keep listening.”

“Okay.” He sounded very unsure of himself, or what she was asking of him.

“Great.” She clicked the radio off, grabbed her jacket from her bedroom and ran back downstairs. As she crossed the lawn she could hear the steady strum of the motor boat at the jetty.

Tyler untied the ropes as she ran down the wharf, her footfalls echoing like thunder in a barrel over the old boards. She climbed breathlessly onto the boat and sat at the back. For now she was happy to just sit and wait until the time was right. Tyler maneuvered the vessel carefully out into the bay before easing it into full throttle. A great white wake rose up behind them and Kirsten watched with delight. She loved the feel of the

sea spray on her face and the wind in her hair. Luckily her firmly set pony tail kept her own hair from whipping into her face.

When they reached the salmon farm Kirsten moved over to Tyler as he steered the boat slowly in beside the nets.

“Can you hold her steady for a minute?” Tyler smiled down at her.

“Of course.” Kirsten grabbed the wheel from Tyler. Her heart raced as he climbed onto the front of the boat and lifted the thick ropes from the deck. His back was turned. This was her one chance to let Jamie in on the conversation. She pulled the coloured elastic band from her hair. Her deep red hair fell around her shoulders as she changed the channel on the CB radio, checked it matched the one in Tyler’s office then wound her hair tie around the handset to force the talk button down. She placed the handset back in its original position and waited for Tyler to return. She took a deep breath to calm her nerves. How could she look at Tyler and pretend she didn’t know everything? Would he see it in her eyes?

“Right, we’re secure.” Tyler jumped back into the cabin.

“Can we talk first, Tyler? Before you run off and do whatever it is you need to do.”

“I thought the idea was talk and work. Isn’t that why you came along?”

“Yes, but I need your full attention Tyler. I need to know you’re telling me the truth.”

“When have I ever lied to you Kirsty?” Tyler asked with sincerity.

“You haven’t always told me everything, let’s put it that way. You’ve told me what you wanted me to hear. This time I want the whole story.”

“Well, I’m not sure what you’re referring to.” Tyler looked grim, as though she had asked for his life, not his words.

“Come on, Tyler. This game you’re playing is really growing old. Why did you tell Jamie about what happened with Greg? What sick purpose could it have served, other than to hurt everyone involved?”

Tyler laughed, taking pleasure in the results he got. “Come on. You saw how Jamie reacted. Where is he now Kirst? I think I proved my point.”

“And what point was that?”

“When the going gets tough, he can’t handle it. He’s the first to back off. He’s not good enough for you Kirsty.”

“Not good enough? Like he wasn’t good enough for Leigh? Like he wasn’t good enough for your sister?” Kirsten took a step toward him.

“Don’t even get me started on that. It has nothing to do with you.” Tyler raised his voice to match her own angry timbre.

“You’ve made it everything to do with me, Tyler. You drew me in from the very moment I arrived here, and now it has everything to do with me. You think sticking me in Brook’s dress isn’t sick enough? I know you want to drive Jamie away. Was it so wrong that he loved your sister?”

“Yes it was,” Tyler thundered. His eyes clouded over with the thought of his dead sister. “She was so wrong for him. She needed someone who understood her.”

“Like you did?” Kirsten questioned, dropping her tone.

“I loved her more than he ever could have.”

“She was your sister Tyler. Your sister!” Kirsten hissed.

“It didn’t matter. I was the only one who really understood what she had been through.”

“That doesn’t mean you had a right to rule her. To do things to her that brothers and sisters shouldn’t do.”

Tyler’s eyes clouded with rage and he grabbed Kirsten by her upper arms, his fingers digging into her soft flesh.

“I should ask you what lies Jamie has been filling your head with.”

Kirsten winced and wriggled to get lose from his grip but he held her fast. “Not Jamie, Tyler. Brook. I found her diary. She told me everything. How you were both molested by your father, how you were so warped by what he did to you that you did the same thing to her. It’s all there, right down to the last entry.” She gasped as Tyler gripped her tight. But she was compelled to continue. She had to know the final truth about Brook’s death. “She said she was going to tell Jamie everything, and that was her last entry, Tyler. The day before she died.”

“Her diary,” Tyler exclaimed, “Where is it?” He shook her roughly. Her head snapped back and her neck jarred painfully.

“Tyler, you’re hurting me,” Kirsten yelped. Tyler’s eyes cleared for a moment and he released her. She took a step back and rubbed her arms. “It’s back at the house.”

“Who else has seen it?”

“Nobody.” She could safely say it was the truth. Hopefully though, she thought, Jamie was getting every word of our conversation. She looked around the boat then back at Tyler. “Come on, Tyler. It’s just you and me. Time to be completely honest. Brook didn’t die while she was riding did she?”

Tyler glared at her with hatred. “What are you implying?”

Kirsten tried to keep her cool, but inside she was shaking like a leaf. “The other night you said you had been arguing. It was about Sarah wasn’t it?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Come on. Who am I going to tell? You said it yourself, Jamie has gone. It’s obvious he doesn’t care about me. This is between you and me. I just want to know the truth. You owe me that much. For Brook’s sake, please tell me.”

Tyler laughed snidely. “She was just like you; just like you are now. All high and mighty and taking the high ground. She wasn’t innocent, and neither are you.” He took a step toward Kirsten but she stood her ground. She didn’t want him to know that right now she was more scared of him than she had been of anything in her whole life. He wasn’t the Tyler she thought she knew anymore. He was a burning body of jealousy and hate. And if she wasn’t careful he would work out she wasn’t on his side. In fact it was possible he already had.

Tyler continued, “She wanted to leave me. After everything we’d been through she was going to go away with Jamie and leave me. She was going to take Sarah and I couldn’t have that.”

“Did you kill her, Tyler?”

“No,” Tyler snapped. He took another step toward Kirsten and this time she backed away. “I didn’t kill her. I just wanted her to listen. I just wanted to make her understand she couldn’t do this to me. She kept moving away from me; wouldn’t let me touch her. I tried to catch her but she slipped and fell down a ravine.”

“So you made up the story about her being knocked off by a branch?”

“I didn’t want Beth to know what had really happened. It would have destroyed her. There was no need for that after everything else. So I turned Brook’s horse loose instead, made it look like it had been a riding accident.”

Kirsten groaned and put her hand over her mouth. The colour had drained from her face.

“You do believe me don’t you, Kirsty?”

“Ah-huh.” Kirsten made a feeble attempt to nod her head.

“What will you do with the information I just gave you?”

Kirsten looked up at Tyler. “I told you, it’s just between us.”

“What about the diary?” He clenched his hands into fists, released them then repeated the exercise. Kirsten never let her eyes leave him.

She swallowed. “The diary is back at the house, Tyler. As soon as we get back I’ll give it to you.”

“You make it sound so easy.” He inched his way closer to Kirsten again. She didn’t want to but she moved away from him, her body willing her to do so through fear. “You weren’t going to give it to Jamie were you?”

“Well, originally I was. He was Brook’s wife, it’s rightfully his. But with him gone I guess it’s yours now.”

“Why do I get the feeling you’re just telling me what I want to hear now?” Tyler’s voice was calm; too calm.

Kirsten attempted a smile. “Tyler, I’ve never lied to you.”

“I do believe that Kirsty. But something’s not right.” He lunged at Kirsten, tried to catch her by the arm again, but she was too quick and expected it. She moved to the side, only to realise her own mistake too late. To her right was a chilly bin and she tripped over it, her shin tearing in pain as the skin slid off against the rough plastic surface. She yelped as she lost her balance; her arm caught her weight on the side of the boat and she felt a crunch of bone. A hot bolt of pain shot up into her shoulder. As her weight shifted she felt her legs go into the air. Her body rolled off the edge of the boat and into the water. Being a warm afternoon the water was a cold contrast and Kirsten gasped as the salty liquid surrounded her. The sound here was far deeper than back in their bay, the water a deep bottle green.

When she came up for air Kirsten was dazed and had lost her bearings. She turned in the water to see unfamiliar hills in the distance. Sheep dotted the green like tiny balls of cotton. Behind her she heard a splash as Tyler launched himself off the boat. She gasped and using her legs she propelled her body round one hundred and eighty degrees in the water. She had no idea what Tyler’s intentions were. Did he mean to silence her, just as Brook had been silenced in the end?

She tread the water with one arm, while she nestled the other against her chest in pain. She wasn’t sure but she suspected the bone there was broken. As Tyler surfaced Kirsten scanned his face for any sign of his intentions. Behind him she could see the late afternoon sun lowering itself to sleep. The sky there had turned beautiful shades of pink and yellow. How ironic she thought to herself. What a fantastic sunset.

“Kirsty, are you okay?” Tyler spluttered as he shook the water from his face.

“I think my arm is broken.”

“Let me help you.” His voice was calm, soft and unfeeling. He reached out his hand but Kirsten could only stare at it. Something wasn’t right. She thought back to the night she had slipped getting out of the hot tub and how he had said the same thing. He’d sounded completely different then. This wasn’t the same Tyler.

“Tyler, please,” she pleaded with him.

“Kirst, come on. Don’t be stupid.” He was almost at her side now, but she couldn’t move from the spot. Where would she go anyway?

Tyler moved swiftly through the water and reached out to her. Before she knew what was happening he grabbed her by the arm and she screamed out in pain.

“How convenient,” Tyler snarled, his lips turned up into a triumphant smile. “You made this so easy for me, Kirsten.” Before she could do anything he pushed her under the water, his hand atop her head as he held her beneath the surface. She fought to escape his grip but her arm was a white flash of hot pain. It consumed her. She fought the panic which rose inside her, made her lungs burn for air. Finally when she realised she would drown if she didn’t do something, she forced herself into a ball, pulled her legs into her chest and rolled away from Tyler. Using all her weight she pushed her feet into Tyler’s stomach and wrenched her body from his grip. She tried to ignore the pain in her arm as she swam down into the water, as far as she could on the breath she had left. She knew she was a stronger swimmer than Tyler, even with a broken arm. If she could just get far enough away from him she would be okay. Her heart sank as she realised he could just go back to the boat, and then it would be all over. He had the perfect killing machine then; he could run straight over her then and claim it had been an accident. She needed to get away and hide before he had that opportunity. When she surfaced for air she turned to see Tyler, following her as quickly as he could. His thickset body moved through the water behind her, closing the gap between them. She continued to kick away from him, easily putting a good distance between them in several strokes. He was no match for her in the water.

“Come on, Kirsten. Where are you going to go?”

She stopped and turned. She continued to tread the water and watch him, hoping for a moment to catch her breath and collect her thoughts before he pursued her again. He regarded her with a cool brown stare.

She was just about to speak when something cold and heavy brushed her ankle, and she glanced down into the murky depths. A long dark shadow moved past her in the water. Even in the fading light she knew what it was before the fin broke the surface. She froze with fear. Even the thought of Tyler wanting to kill her was nothing compared to being in the ocean with one of the finest predators ever created.

“Jesus!” she screamed. “Tyler, there’s a shark!”

Tyler gave a low deep throaty growl. He obviously thought she was trying to call his bluff.

The water between them rippled. A shiny brown fin broke the surface, followed by a smaller dorsal. The tail flicked and the cold blooded animal disappeared beneath the surface once more. Kirsten’s heart pounded in her chest, but she tried to stay as still as possible in the water. She knew that thrashing around would only send the shark into a frenzy. Tyler on the other hand panicked. He threw himself back in the water and paddled furiously toward the boat.

“Tyler,” Kirsten yelled. “Stay still.”

“Fuck that,” Tyler responded as he continued to clamber for the boat. Her words could do no good. She saw the terror in Tyler’s eyes and knew he was beyond control. There was nothing she could do except watch and hope he would make it back to the boat before the shark picked up on his distress.

“Tyler!” Kirsten knew if he made it back to the boat she would be on her own. Tyler would leave her to her own defenses. It would be another convenience for him if she was eaten alive.

Kirsten watched in horror as Tyler’s body jerked back in the water with such force that he disappeared beneath the surface momentarily. The shark rolled with Tyler’s body in the water. Kirsten saw the flash of its cream belly before it released him. A moment later Tyler resurfaced, sputtering and screaming. His eyes were wide, the

whites showing in disbelief. The shark had disappeared, but Kirsten wondered if it was just circling for another attack, or whether it had decided Tyler wasn’t really food and had moved on.

“Tyler, get to the boat, now!” Kirsten yelled. She tried to stay calm; told herself it was necessary if she wanted to avoid the same fate. She took a deep breath and let it seep between her lips, then moved through the water as quickly as she could without making too much of a disturbance. She saw Tyler reach the back of the boat, claw at the white fiberglass surface there in panic as he tried pull himself up. But the edge of the boat was too high and he couldn’t reach it. The ladder was still tucked neatly away inside the boat and there were no ropes over the side to grab on to. If he had been uninjured he may have been able to propel himself up out of the water. Kirsten finally reached Tyler. Ignoring the dull throb in her own arm she tried to take hold of him by the arms. He lunged at her; nearly forced her under again, but she managed to stay afloat. The pain in her arm flared and she winced. The water around them had become a murky red puddle and she knew Tyler was badly hurt. There was too much blood for it to just be a surface wound.

“Keep still!” Kirsten commanded as she tried to get past the panic in his eyes.

“Jesus, the fucking thing bit me.” His brown eyes were still saucers of disbelief.

“I know. Tyler, you have to calm down. Your heart’s going so fast it’s going to speed up your blood loss. Where did it get you?”

Tyler seemed to calm almost instantly. “My thigh. The bastard got my leg.”

“Okay we have to get you out of the water.”

“God Kirsty, I feel like I’m going to pass out.” Tyler’s face turned ashen and Kirsten shook him by the shoulders.

“You can’t pass out, Tyler. I can’t get you out of the water on my own.”

“Huh.” Tyler laughed at the irony. “You can’t get back on the boat anyway, can you?”

He looked down at her arm. “How are you going to pull yourself up with one arm?”

“Well we have to get you out of the water.” Kirsten gazed around for a solution.

“If we can get around the other side of the platform there’s a ladder. From there you’ll be able to get back onto the boat.”

“On the other side?” She looked annoyed. “Tyler, why did you tie the boat on this side, if the ladder is way over the other side?”

Tyler gave her a weak smile. “Well, I didn’t think we’d end up in the drink like this, did I?”

Kirsten scowled. “You know I’m still thinking if the roles were reversed you’d leave me here to die.”

Tyler closed his eyes. For a moment Kirsten thought he had lost consciousness, until he spoke, “You know you’re probably right.” He opened his eyes. “Why don’t you leave me here?”

“Because, I’m not you.”

“Kirsten, I’m so sorry.” Tyler started to shiver and Kirsten knew he was going into shock.

“We have to get you out of the water.” She moved around behind him. “Can you swim?”

“I don’t know if I can. Leave me here and get to the ladder. Once you’re on the boat we can figure out a way to get me up there. If you’re lucky the little bastard will come back and finish me off and you won’t have to worry about me anymore.”

“Tyler, don’t say that.” Kirsten’s voice was stern. “You’re not going to die so stop talking that way.”

Tyler reached out and touched her hand. His fingers were cold and they trembled against her. “If I get out of this, I will make it up to you, Kirsty. I know what I did was wrong, to you, to Brook. If you get me out of this I’ll get help. I need help.” His eyes held so much sadness that tears welled up in Kirsten’s eyes. “Please help me, Kirsten.”

“I will.” Kirsten touched his face and smiled. “You’re going to be fine, just hang on. You’re not allowed to pass out while I’m gone okay?”

Tyler nodded and Kirsten turned away. She did her best to move through the water swiftly and felt much better once she was between the boat and the oversized salmon nets. She felt as though they gave her some protection, however knowing the fish had lured the shark in the first place it brought little comfort. It took her at least ten minutes to work her way around the nets. Her arm throbbed and she leaned to her good side, using her left arm and both legs to propel her through the water. Getting her body up the ladder proved to be another mission. It was a rope ladder with wooden slatted steps, and it swayed to and fro in the water as she climbed with one arm. She slipped a few times and crashed into the boards above, but finally she was able to climb high enough to pull her weight onto her stomach then roll onto the floating platform. She stood and walked carefully back around the opposite side of the nets. The platform swayed under her feet and she moved with caution, knowing if she traveled too fast she would lose her balance and end up back in the water.

“Tyler,” she yelled frantically as the boat came into view at the other end. There was no answer. She scrambled over the side of the boat, ran to the stern and peered over the edge. Tyler was still there, barely conscious, his eyes closed and head just above the water line.

“Tyler!” His eyes opened and took a moment to focus before they settled on her face above him.

“You look like an angel.” His lips hardly moved as he talked, making him sound like someone intoxicated. She knew he was running out of time. She cleared the boxes away from the loading hatch, slid the board from its hold and cast it aside with little thought. This left a gaping hole in the stern and she was able to reach down to water level. She stretched out to grab Tyler but he was still too far away.

“I can’t reach you, Ty. You gotta try and get over here so I can help you onto the boat.”

Tyler used his arms as best he could to push himself through the water toward her. Everything seemed to happen in slow motion. His body was shutting down.

“Come on, Tyler. Just a little bit further.” Kirsten stretched out as far as she could and finally caught the fabric of his shirt sleeve. She pulled him the rest of the way. She stretched his arms over the lip of the boat, but was unable to pull him up out of the water with one arm. Using both arms she reached over his back and took hold of the waistline of his jeans. Sucking in her breath she closed her eyes, trying to think just about Tyler and not her injured arm. He was hurt and he was going to die if she didn’t help him. When the adrenaline began to flow she gritted her teeth and pulled as hard as she could. Later she couldn’t recall who yelped louder, her or Tyler, but eventually his body slid from the water, onto the deck of the pleasure craft. As she opened her eyes the first thing that came to mind was that someone had been gutting fish. There was so much blood. It ran over the deck and down through the slots at the back of the boat. Tyler moaned as she rolled him over, his eyes closed once more.

“Tyler, stay with me.” Kirsten unbuttoned her shirt and carefully removed it. She knew there were major arteries in the thigh and if she didn’t stop the bleeding it would mean his life. She stared at his face, pale and listless in the fading light. Maybe it was already too late. The remains of day still held some heat but a cool breeze wafted over the bay and cooled her wet skin.

“I just-,” Tyler whispered, “wanna sleep a l-little.”

“No,” Kirsten knelt beside him. Wrapping the shirt around his leg she secured it over the tear in his pants. She averted her eyes, couldn’t bring herself to look too closely at the wound in case the sight made her faint. What good would she be then? “Lucky you weren’t wearing shorts mate,” Kirsten joked as she tried to keep Tyler focused on her words. “He obviously didn’t like the taste of your jeans otherwise he might have been back to get the rest of you.”

Tyler smiled but kept his eyes closed. “Juss as well these are my ole jeans,” he slurred.

“There you go.” Kirsten smiled, relieved to hear the humour in his voice, even though he sounded as if he were stoned out of his tree. She jumped to her feet and climbed down into the cabin to find a blanket. Plucking one from a narrow couch she returned and placed it over Tyler, tucking it in under his sides. If she could get his body temperature up then he might just have a chance. Then she remembered the radio. What if Jamie hadn’t heard them? What if nobody knew where they were?

“I’m going to call for help. Tyler. You just wait there.”

Tyler’s eyes opened and he lifted one hand, took hold of Kirsten by the wrist.

“Wait,” he said. “I don’t want to die alone.”

Kirsten began to sob, big salty tears streaming down her face and falling onto Tyler as she bent over him.

“You’re not going to die.” In the distance Kirsten could hear the hum of a diesel boat engine. She slumped back down on the deck and Tyler rolled to put his head onto her legs. She stroked his hair and smiled.

“Someone’s coming. It’s going to be okay.”

“Mmm.” He closed his eyes and buried his face in her lap.

“Don’t you go to sleep on me,” Kirsten ordered. “You know you have a big debt to repay me and I’m not letting you get off lightly.”

“You’re so b-bossy,” Tyler sighed. “I’m so glad you’re n-not my n-nanny.”

The sun had almost disappeared as the boat approached. Kirsten felt the wake push their craft from side to side and she peered into the darkness. There was no mistaking who had come for them when she heard the voice call out.

“Kirsten.”

Her heart leapt and fresh tears sprang to her eyes. “Jamie!”

A bright light flooded the deck and Kirsten shielded her face with her arm until her eyes adjusted. In a matter of seconds Jamie crossed from one boat to the other and was down on the deck next to Kirsten. He dragged her out from under Tyler and she yelped as he squeezed her broken arm.

“Jesus, Kirsty. What happened?”

“He was attacked by a shark,” Kirsten sobbed as she peered up at her knight in shining armour. “We have to get him to hospital.”

Jamie knelt, placing himself between Kirsten and Tyler. Kirsten peered over his shoulder, but Jamie’s body threw a dark shadow over Tyler’s face and she couldn’t see anything.

“Kirsten I’m sorry, there’s nothing we can do for Tyler. It’s too late,” Jamie whispered.

“No!” Kirsten shrieked in alarm. “He was just talking to me a few minutes ago. He’s just sleeping.”

“He’s not breathing, Kirst, and there’s no pulse.”

“No!” She tried to push Jamie out of the way. Why was he lying? Jamie stood, turned and took Kirsten around the waist.

“Kirsty, he’s gone.”

“He’s not.” She beat at his chest, tried to push him away. “We have to help him.”

“Stop!” Jamie pinned her arms to her side and drew her into his chest. “He’s gone, Kirsty. It’s too late.”

Kirsten collapsed against him. Sobs wracked her body and she cried into the warmth of Jamie’s jacket. He held her tight in his arms, his lips firm against the top of her head as she poured her emotions into him.

“It’s okay,” Jamie soothed.

“It’s not okay,” Kirsty sobbed, her face hidden inside the soft cocoon of Jamie’s embrace. “This is my fault, Jamie.”

Jamie clucked his tongue and lifted Kirsten’s chin so that her face was tilted to his own. “Don’t you dare say it. You know as well as I do Tyler brought this all on himself.”

In the distance came the soft hum of another boat approaching.

“The coastguard and probably the police,” Jamie whispered.

“How much do they know?”

“Only what I had to tell them to get them out here.”

“How much did you hear, Jamie?” Kirsten wiped her face.

“I heard everything up to where Tyler asked you what you were going to do. After that you got too far away from the radio. I knew something was wrong when everything went quiet. I tried to call back on other frequencies but you must have jammed the radio. I couldn’t get through and I was already heading back to the house, so I went down to Sam Gordon’s place and borrowed the boat.” He pushed the hair out of Kirsten’s face, his eyes filled with concern. “Jesus, Kirsty. I was sure I was going to find your body here, not Tyler’s. What on earth possessed you to come out here with Tyler on your own?”

“You were so mad at me. I just wanted to put things right. I needed to know what had really happened. It was the only thing I could think of to do.” She put her good arm around Jamie’s neck and he squeezed her to him.

“God, Kirsten.” He breathed into her hair. “I don’t know what I would have done if I’d lost you.”

Another light appeared as the third boat approached and they heard voices.

“Wait here.” Jamie released Kirsten but she grabbed him by the wrist before he could go.

“Jamie?”

“What?”

“Don’t tell them everything.”

“What do you mean?” He frowned.

“I don’t want Beth to know-,” she paused, “you know, everything. There’s no need. Please.”

Jamie looked confused for a moment. “But . . .”

“Please Jamie,” Kirsten pleaded. “It’s over. Let him die in peace. Beth doesn’t need to know.”

“Okay.”

The chain of events which followed seemed to meld into a blur for Kirsten. She let Jamie take charge and she answered the questions she was asked, omitting anything that would incriminate Tyler. She didn’t have to lie; neither of them did. The facts were she had fallen over board and Tyler had been attacked by a shark. It didn’t seem suspicious and so they were not asked anything they had to falsify. She watched as they carried Tyler’s lifeless form from the deck of the boat and covered him with a blanket. She cried and Jamie took her in his arms. Tyler was gone.

“Come on; let’s get you out of here.” Jamie led her to the other boat, wrapped a blanket around her for warmth. “I’m going to take you home.”

Kirsten sat in silence in the darkness. Home to what? She wondered as they headed back to the house. How could she go back there and act as if this had all been one big accident? How could she face Beth, knowing she was responsible for the death of her second child? Nothing would ever be the same again.

Chapter 15

“Kirsten, I need to get you to hospital. Your arm needs to be set.” Jamie stood in the kitchen under the bright halogens with the limb in question in his large hands. “I’m going to take the boat back to Sam’s, get the car and come back for you.”

Kirsten raised her sad green eyes to Jamie’s face. “You’re not leaving me here alone, Jamie. Not now.”

Jamie sighed. “Then I’ll take you with me.”

“No.” Kirsten shook her head. “I’m not getting back on a damn boat again tonight. Please don’t make me.”

“Okay.” Jamie smiled, lowered her arm and took her face between his hands instead.

“Let me at least get you out of these wet clothes.”

He stripped her clinging clothes carefully from her body until she stood, just in her underwear, in the middle of the kitchen. Then he lifted her gently off her feet and carried her to his bedroom.

“And before you say anything else, yes, you are sleeping with me tonight. I’m not leaving you alone like this.” He pushed the door and carried her across the floor to the bed. In the dark she sat and let Jamie help her out of her bra. Then she peeled off her knickers and climbed in between the blankets.

“What, you think I’m going to argue with that?” she asked as she listened to him undress on the other side of the room.

As he slipped in beside her Kirsten rolled and nestled into his warmth. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and she hung her arm over his back. She felt the floodgates open again and she cried into him. Her tears flowed down over the fine hairs of his chest and she clung to him as he held her against him.

“It’s okay.” His fingers traced the outline of her spine, down to her waist and he pulled her even closer to his body. “God, Kirsten. I’m so sorry.”

“I’m the one who should be sorry,” she sobbed.

“No, none of this is your fault. I should have looked after you. I should never have left like I did. I knew something wasn’t right with Tyler but I ignored it. If I’d just told you more, let you in . . .”

“I let you go,” Kirsten said with a sigh. “I should have explained, made things right between us.”

“You had a right to be mad at me. I put that damn wall up and let Tyler get to me again. It wasn’t right to take it out on you. If I’d just come to you none of this would have happened.”

“Jamie?” Kirsten asked in a whisper.

“Yes?”

“You knew about Sarah, didn’t you?”

“I guess I did,” Jamie confessed. “Though part of me never wanted to admit it. It was easier to turn a blind eye. It’s something I should have faced up to a long time ago.”

“Do you think Tyler is her father?”

Jamie sighed. “I really don’t know, Kirsten. It’s a strong possibility.”

“Don’t you want to know?”

“What would it solve now? Tyler’s gone.”

“For your own sake though, don’t you need to know?”

“I don’t know. I don’t want to think about it tonight. I just want to make sure you’re alright.” He touched his lips to her forehead. “You’re shaking, are you still cold?”

“No,” Kirsten whispered.

They lay in silence for a few moments but the volume in the room was more than Kirsten could bear.

“Jamie?”

“Ah-huh?”

“I need to tell you what happened with Greg Hamilton.”

“It’s okay Kirsty, you don’t need to explain.”

“Yes I do. I should have told you earlier but I wasn’t sure how to broach the subject and it just never seemed like the right time.”

“Well, it certainly wasn’t on my mind tonight after everything that’s happened.”

“I know. But it was blown out of proportion and I want you to know my side of the story. Tyler didn’t even hear it from me. I think you should know that. He decided to go skulking into my closet before Beth hired me, and what he found must have looked pretty bad.”

“If he knew how to do one thing it was to manipulate a situation to his own advantage.”

Kirsten wiped a stray tear from her face. “God, I still can’t believe he’s gone.”

“Hey, it’s okay.” Jamie shook her gently, realised why she wanted to talk about something else. “Tell me your story.”

Kirsten sniffed and got herself under control again. Taking a deep breath she let it filter out between her lips.

“I went to work for Greg and Shantelle when their twins, Jaden and Connor, were born. Shantelle was an accountant, she had her own business, and Greg worked in the building industry, he was also self-employed. They both earned great money so it was just natural for them to hire a full time nanny so they could both continue working. They were a great couple and they seemed happy. There was never any awkwardness between us. Shantelle was a beautiful, confident person and everyone liked her. She treated me like part of the family. I’d have the weekends off but I’d often hang around the house because we got on so well.

“When the twins were eight months old Shantelle decided to take them to her mother’s in the North Island for a long weekend. I offered to stay and look after things while she was gone. You know, clean and cook for Greg.

“Greg had work on the Saturday so I cooked a huge evening meal for both of us. The wine flowed and we ate, chatted, and laughed. I remember a song on the radio because Greg made some comment, which struck me as rather odd, something about a guy he used to go to school with and I wasn’t sure what the association was. Anyway, that’s the last thing I remember clearly. The rest of the evening is still lost to me, save waking up in their bed with Greg naked beside me. I know it sounds terrible but it wouldn’t have been so bad if Shantelle hadn’t found us there. I spent the rest of the day puking my guts out and holding my head together before it split in two. It wasn’t until much later that someone suggested I’d been slipped something in the wine. If I had thought about it I could have gone to a doctor, been drug tested or something, but it was too late by then. It would have been my word against Greg’s, so I left without a fuss. It was only later, when I went to see a lawyer who dug up information on Greg’s past, that it all seemed to fit. He’d been arrested before he met Shantelle, on drugs charges, and there had also been a rape charge, which was dropped before it made it to court. It was almost enough

to make me take it further, but then I thought about Shantelle and what it would do to her and the boys, so I just left it.”

Jamie was quiet for a moment as he digested everything he had heard. Then he spoke in a soft raspy voice, “God, Kirsty. I had no idea.”

“Of course you didn’t.” Kristen shrugged. “That’s why I should have told you. I had nothing to hide. Instead Tyler took this little tidbit of information and turned it into a sordid affair.”

“And the rest is history,” Jamie finished under his breath. Kirsten rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling. The room was a grey blur of merging shadows but now her eyes had adjusted to the dark she could just make out Jamie’s face. Her arm throbbed and she knew there would be little sleep for her before she had to face the new day. Jamie lay quiet in his own thoughts, not sure what to say to make her feel any better. She was in his space, surrounded by the smells and sounds of his world, but something which should have been hers to build wonderful memories on just added to her sadness. She was naked in Jamie’s arms, but the events leading up to it were ultimately wrong. Nothing about it felt right.

Sadly she thought about Tyler. Even in death he had been victorious. He had driven a wedge between them and she wondered if anything would ever be normal between them again. The secrets they shared would forever be Tyler’s weapon against them.

* * * *

Kirsten kicked a stone along the dirt road. The echo resounded off the clay wall as it bounced, down through the Manuka trees toward the house. She picked her way along the driveway, down into the shade of the native bush. She cradled the day’s mail across her chest with one hand. Her other arm hung at her side, the purple cast swinging back and forth against her body. It covered most of her lower arm, and bent round her thumb, leaving her five appendages peeking from the end. Little tufts of cotton swabbing had frayed where she had poked a knitting needle in to ease the itching. She couldn’t wait for the day when it was time to have the cast removed. It had been nothing but a nuisance; a constant reminder of what they had all been through. She found Jamie by the fence of the old horse paddock. His back was turned to her as he leaned over the old wooden railing, staring off into space as if the world had come to rest on his shoulders.

He turned and smiled as she approached.

“Hi, there.”

Kirsten grinned as she pulled a large manila envelope from the pile and waved it in front of Jamie’s face. “It came.”

It had been her ritual to check the mail every day since they had arrived home from the hospital.

Talking Jamie into taking the test had been one thing, but actually getting him to open the envelope was going to be another, she decided, as the expression on his face dropped.

“Open it, Jamie.” She lifted his hand to take the letter from her.

“I don’t know if I can.” Jamie eyed the envelope with speculation, as if it might explode in his face. He took a deep breath, looked at Kirsten and then let the air go in one massive blow.

“Of course you can.” She dropped her smile and gave him a serious glare. “You know she’s still your daughter regardless of what a piece of paper says.”

Jamie smiled, but his brows were drawn together into tiny lines. “I know. But I’ve had this in the back of my mind for so long. I don’t quite know what I’ll do once I know the truth.”

Kirsten touched his hand. “It’s something else you can finally put behind you.”

Carefully Jamie tore the top of the envelope, creating a little curl of brown paper as the end ripped away. Kirsten took it from him and twisted it in her fingers impatiently. He reached inside and pulled a thin sheet of paper from the envelope. Kirsten could see the hospital insignia through the back of it but could not make out the words below.

“What does it say?” Her voice was shrill and impatient. “Jamie?”

His face was expressionless as he read the results again. Kirsten’s heart dropped in her chest. The news obviously confirmed the fears he had carried for so many years.

“Oh, Jamie. I’m sorry.”

Jamie lifted his gaze to hers; deep lines dimpled his cheeks as his face broke into a smile. “What are you sorry for? She’s mine.”

“Oh, Jamie!” She launched herself upon him and the papers flew through the air, along with the rest of the mail, onto the grass. He grabbed her around the waist and swept her into a bear hug.

“God, Kirsty. She’s mine,” Jamie repeated as if he could hardly believe it himself.

“That’s wonderful.” Kirsten bent to pick up the mail once Jamie set her back on her feet. The look on his face meant more to her than he would ever know. Something good had finally come from everything that had happened. Her eyes shone with tears as she stood to face him, the mail back under control once more.

“Kirsten.” Jamie reached for her but she pulled her arm away. He knew her tears meant more than just her happiness over his welcome news.

“Don’t.” Her eyes pleaded with him. “Please.”

She turned from him and started to walk away.

“Kirsten, wait.” Jamie’s words followed but his body didn’t. She quickened her pace and left him standing where she had found him.

She entered the house through the back door, dropped the mail on the table and followed the corridor up the stairs to the third floor like she had done so many times before. Her bedroom door stood open and the boxes, which had been there that morning, were gone. The room looked as it had on the first day she arrived. She walked to the wardrobe and opened the doors. Empty clothes hangers rattled as the shift in air moved them on the rail.

Kirsten crossed to the window and peered down at the bay for the last time. A lonely Shag floated on the water near the jetty. She could just make out the black form as it bobbed up and down. As she watched it bent its neck and disappeared under the water with a twitch of its tail feathers.

She moved to the bedside cabinet and picked up her handbag. It was the last thing of hers in the room. Silently she reached in, pulled out a small velvet box and placed it on the nightstand.

Then she turned and left the room without a second glance. She took the elevator down to the ground floor. She didn’t want to pass the grand bookshelves, now missing their books, standing empty and bare.

Kirsten walked along the back corridor again and into the kitchen. Craig was perched on a kitchen stool at the back door, having a cigarette.

“Hey, there.”

“Hey, Craig,” she said with affection.

“Your Dad’s out the front with the girls.”

Kirsten smiled as Craig placed Beth in the same category as Sarah.

“You look after her, won’t you?” Kirsten teased with a grin.

“Oh, don’t you worry about that little lady. I intend to.”

Kirsten giggled. “It’s been nice working with you, Craig.”

The big man stubbed out his cigarette with one foot, then came back inside to give her a hug.

She wiped a tear from her face as he let her go.

“Now look what you made me do.” Kirsten batted him playfully with her good hand. She walked out through the dining room and into the lounge. The French doors had been thrown open to another summer day, and she could see her father, standing with Beth on the front steps of the patio. He had on a plaid jacket, even though he would be roasting in the heat, and his hands were planted in the pockets of his blue jeans. Beth looked up as she approached and smiled.

“There she is. We were just talking about you.”

“Kirsten!” Sarah yelled from the lawn. She ran up the hill and launched herself into Kirsten’s arms. Kirsten hoisted her onto her hip and the little girl looped her legs around her waist, dropped her head onto her shoulder.

“Sarah, be careful,” Beth warned.

“It’s okay, Beth.” She looked at Sarah and smiled. “But you are getting too big to do this you know.” Sarah giggled as Kirsten planted a kiss on the end of her nose. Her hair had been washed and it smelt like fresh picked apples.

“Are you ready to go?” Todd Rhodes seemed out of place in this landscape as he climbed the stairs and smiled at his daughter. Kirsten had missed him; all her family for that matter, but now it seemed he was the bearer of all things coming to an end. He was there to take her home.

“Ah-huh.” Kirsten nodded.

“Kirsty, I don’t want you to go,” Sarah said in dreadful sadness. Kirsten smiled despite the fact her heart was aching inside. “Hey, you don’t need me anymore, Sarah. You and your dad are going to Nelson and you’re going to a new school. Won’t that be great?”

“Yes.” Sarah nodded, but she still seemed unsure. Everything had changed for the young girl over the last few weeks. Her uncle had died and Jamie was taking her away to a new home. Beth had the house on the market and would probably move to Blenheim where she could be closer to the business and Sarah.

“Will you visit us?”

Kirsten sighed, unsure of what to say. She and Jamie had sidestepped any relevant conversations since the night of Tyler’s death. She looked up at Beth, who smiled knowingly.

“Of course she can visit us.” Jamie appeared from the lounge and put his arm around Beth. “Anytime she wants to.”

Kirsten’s smile faltered as she looked at Jamie. There was so much left unsaid between them, so much she wanted to say, but they had both avoided it like the plague. Now it was time to leave him.

She hugged Sarah as they walked across the path to the driveway, where Todd’s car waited.

“Do you mind if I drive for a while, Dad?” Kirsten smiled. “I hate this road. It’s the only thing I won’t miss.”

“Sure, honey.” He tossed her the keys as she set Sarah back on the ground. Kirsten knelt beside Sarah so she had to look up into her face. Sarah was getting tall now, growing every day. Soon she would be a beautiful young lady like her mother had been.

“You look after your dad, okay?” Kirsten smiled.

Two big tears rolled down Sarah’s cheeks as she nodded.

“Don’t cry sweetie, it’s all good.” Kirsten wiped Sarah’s tears away with her hand, but two more took their place and Sarah whined.

Kirsten’s eyes welled up with her own sadness. “Now you’ve made me cry.”

Sarah laughed through her tears. “I’ll miss you.”

“Oh, I’ll miss you too, honey.” Sarah put her arms around Kirsten’s neck and hugged her. Then Kirsten stood up and took her by the hand. She looked over at Beth and smiled. Surprisingly the older woman had tears in her own eyes.

“I’m sorry things ended like this,” she said to Kirsten as she laid a shaking hand on her arm.

“Me too, Beth. More sorry than you will ever know.” She lowered her gaze. Beth put her hand under Kirsten’s chin and lifted her face back to her own.

“Honey, there are no hard feelings. Sometimes these things happen for a reason. They’re sent to make us stronger people. You need to make peace with it yourself.”

“I’m trying.” Kirsten whispered. She recalled the words Beth had said at Tyler’s funeral.

My children are together in heaven.

She had pondered the statement over and over since then. Kirsten had never been one to believe in heaven. But she did believe there was something on the other side of death. When it came to Tyler and Brook it was easier to look past heaven, because it was a place that had many rules. Rules that Tyler had been very good at not following. In her mind they were now together though, and hopefully at peace. Beth smiled. “If I’m in Christchurch, may I visit?”

Kirsten laughed. “Of course you can. I’d love to keep in touch.”

She moved last to Jamie. He took his daughter’s hand and Sarah released Kirsten to latch onto her father’s leg.

Kirsten looked up into his eyes. She couldn’t read his face; he had masked it carefully for everyone else, as he had learned to do so skillfully over the years. There were things she wanted to say; things she wanted him to say, but she knew they were out of time. He had Sarah to think about now and that’s where his focus should be. There was no longer anything standing in the way of whatever they wanted to do. Kirsten was happy for them.

“You two look after each other.” Kirsten smiled as she fought back the tears. I love you. It was on her lips but she couldn’t say it; couldn’t bear to see it not reflected back in his eyes. She swallowed hard instead.

“You too, Kirsty.” Jamie pulled her to him and she slipped her arms around his neck. He held her close for a moment, his hand firm against the small of her back. Then she turned and walked to the car before he could see the tears in her eyes.

“Kirsty?” her father questioned as she climbed into the car and pulled the seatbelt across her lap.

“Please, Dad,” she whispered as she started the car, “don’t say anything until we get out of sight.” She knew if he said anything right now the floodgates would open. She wanted to leave with a little dignity.

Kirsten drove the little car slowly up the driveway. In the rear vision mirror she took one last look at the place and the people she had fallen in love with.

Chapter 16

The Rhodes house was bustling with energy for a Saturday morning. Kirsten sat in the conservatory, her legs crossed as she sat in the sun reading the newspaper. The sounds of her family around her were a great distraction but she tried to concentrate on the situations vacant section nevertheless. She needed to find a job. The cast had been removed from her arm now and she was restless, despite her mother’s insistence that she should take several weeks to herself before she decided her next career move. She just couldn’t do it. She was too much like her father. It was in her genes to keep busy. Besides, living here with her parents and two sisters was driving her up the wall. Kirsten couldn’t understand how Shelley could still do it.

Somewhere in the kitchen a song drifted from the radio as Jenny Rhodes and Alicia did the breakfast dishes together and talked. Shelley sat in the lounge, filing her nails and talking on the phone, probably to Stephen, Kirsten assumed. Why they didn’t just move in together she didn’t know. He was always here, or she stayed at his place, and in between times they talked on the phone.

“Anything interesting?” Her father wandered through the ranch slider door and peered over her shoulder.

“Not unless I’d like to be a sandwich artist, a forklift driver, or I’m qualified to work in the field of, what was it-?” She looked down at the paper. “Pig husbandry.”

Todd laughed and ruffled her hair. “Yep, that’s my girl the pig farmer.”

“Not likely.” Kirsten grinned and turned back to scouring the jobs. A moment later Shelley padded across the tiles in her bare feet, held the phone out.

“For you,” she said and smiled.

“Oh thanks, Shell.” Kirsten took the phone from her sister. “Hello?”

“Kirsten?” It was the unmistakable voice of her previous employer.

“Hi, Beth! What a nice surprise.”

“Oh hi, honey. How are you?”

“I’m good, very good. Are you in Christchurch?”

“Yes, dear, I am. Craig and I are here having a little working holiday. We’d love to see you.”

“You and Craig, huh?” Kirsten teased. “Do I hear wedding bells?”

Beth’s laughter rippled down the phone line. “I don’t think so, honey. But if that changes I’ll let you know.”

“How is Sarah?” Kirsten asked. But what she really wanted to ask first was how is Jamie?

“Oh, she’s great,” Beth said with enthusiasm. “She loves her new school, and Jamie’s parents are so good with her.”

“That’s great.” Kirsten smiled. “And Jamie?” She felt her heart quicken as she spoke his name, hoped it wouldn’t tell in her voice.

“James is the same as always. You know what he’s like. A bear with a sore head one minute and sweet as pie the next.”

Kirsten laughed as Beth continued, “There is one slight change in him recently though. I think he’s getting ready to settle down.”

Kirsten’s heart skipped a beat. It had only been three weeks. Was she referring to a new relationship? Had he moved on already?

“Settle down,” Kirsten started. “Has he met someone?”

“Ah, yes,” Beth confirmed. “She’s quite lovely. I’m very fond of her myself actually.”

Kirsten felt the tears well up in her eyes and she cursed herself silently for letting it affect her so much. She bit her lip and asked, “And Sarah, what does she think?”

“Oh Sarah adores her,” Beth gushed. Then she paused before she added, “Look, Kirsten, can we talk more tonight? I’d love for you to come to dinner with us but right now I have to go to a meeting.”

“I’d like that, Beth. Do you want me to meet you somewhere?”

“No, no,” Beth dismissed her immediately. “I’ll send Craig to get you. Is that okay?”

Kirsten smiled. “Yes, of course, I’ll see you tonight then.”

After fixing a time with Beth Kirsten hung up the phone. Shelley returned to the conservatory after a few moments silence; deciding her sister was off the phone and it should be hers once again.

“You okay, sis?” She saw the look on Kirsten’s face and sat on the floor. Kirsten faked a smile and wiped a stray tear with the back of her hand.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine.”

Later in the afternoon Kirsten found a dress in her wardrobe she hadn’t worn in a while and got herself ready for dinner. It was a plain maroon scoop-neck number. She didn’t know where Beth had booked so the idea to wear something that could be passed as either casual or dressy seemed appropriate.

She decided she would try to avoid any conversations about Jamie all night. The thought of him and what she had walked away from still upset her. And to think that he had already forgotten her, moved on with someone else, was like rubbing salt into her unhealed wounds. Over the last few weeks she had thought about Jamie a lot. She missed Sarah terribly, but it was the thought of Jamie that made her heart ache. Often she found herself wondering, if things had turned out differently, where would we be now? But wondering about the possibilities was torture. She didn’t have Jamie. She couldn’t go back and change everything that had happened. So she had to live with it and try to move on with her life.

Craig arrived at six-thirty on the dot. The ex navy man was always on time and Kirsten greeted him with a huge hug. She stood on her tiptoes and wrapped her arms around his neck. He smiled and blushed.

“You look wonderful as always,” he said, admiring her tidy appearance. Her thin ankles stretched down into black high heels, she’d donned a fine silver ankle bracelet and wore a tiny gold cross on a chain at her neck.

“Thank you.” She did a small curtsy then grabbed her handbag from the table as they walked out together. “You don’t look so bad yourself.”

“How have you been?” Craig glanced down at her.

“Ah, you know.” She smiled. “It gets better every day.”

“Yeah, I know.” Craig nodded. “Beth still finds it hard. She was so pleased you could make it tonight. You really don’t know what it means to her.”

“Well, I’m glad she thought of me,” Kirsten paused. “That you both thought of me.”

Then she grinned up at Craig. “Are there any plans I should know about with you and Miss Elizabeth?”

Craig smiled as he backed down the driveway, avoided eye contact. “We’re just taking it one day at a time.”

“Where are we going?” Kirsten asked as they set out.

“You’ll see. We have to go collect Beth first. She’s at the motel. She’s been in a meeting all day so she’ll be keen to get out and let her hair down. That’s why I offered to pick you up. You know, give me something to do while she was busy.”

When they arrived at the motel, Kirsten smiled. It was one of the more expensive places in Christchurch. Only the best for Beth, she mused as Craig pulled the car to a stop. He glanced at his watch.

“She should be finishing up. Why don’t you go in and I’ll find a park.” Craig pointed to a small building adjacent to the main reception with the words ‘Conference Centre’ over the door.

“Okay.” Kirsten climbed from the vehicle. Gravel crunched under her feet as she walked across the car park.

The building was quiet as she entered the small foyer, and she wondered briefly if Beth was inside, or had in fact already gone back to her room. She listened carefully but couldn’t hear anything from the other side of the double doors that separated her from the conference room. Cautiously she stepped forward. To her left was a small table; a half round pushed up against the wall, the surface and turned wooden legs stained a dark brown. A selection of gerberas in bright colours stood collected together in a glass vase, the base filled with blue marbles.

But it was the box next to it which immediately caught Kirsten’s attention. It was a small green velvet capsule and even before she picked it up she knew what it contained. How could she not? She’d pulled it from her handbag on the day she had left Hampton Grange. The tiny hinges squeaked as she opened the box, and her teardrop emerald earrings glinted up at her.

Confused, she looked up as the doors opened. She gasped. “Jamie.”

He looked wonderful, dressed in a casual black suit over a pastel green shirt.

“Hi, Kirsty.”

She took a step back. “Beth didn’t tell me you were here.” Her mind buzzed as she tried to get her head around what was happening. Why would Beth have left out this important piece of information when Kirsten had asked her about Jamie? Kirsten felt mad at Beth for allowing her to be caught off guard like this in front of him.

“I know. I asked her not to.”

“You asked her not to?”

A smile played around the edges of his mouth as he said, “I never thought I’d say this, but oh how I missed your stupid questions.”

Kirsten didn’t know what to say. Jamie stepped forward and took the earrings carefully from her trembling fingers.

“You know when I gave you these, there were no conditions. They were yours to keep.”

“I know, Jamie. But I couldn’t-” she paused. “After everything that happened, it didn’t seem right.”

Jamie sighed and dropped the box into his jacket pocket. “Everything went wrong after Tyler died.” He took Kirsten’s fingers into his hand.

“Please Jamie, don’t.” She tried to pull her hand from his grasp but he held her fast. She couldn’t get past what Beth had told her about Jamie. How could he stand here and act like this when he had moved on with somebody else?

“Just shut up and listen,” Jamie said sternly. “I didn’t say it before and I should have. I let you go, Kirsten, without saying all the things I should have said. We both just let everything slip between our fingers and I was a coward. I was confused. Everything that happened seemed to bring some finality to the part of my life that belonged to Brook, and I wanted to put it all behind me. I let you become part of that chapter of my life. I didn’t mean to shut you out, Kirsten, and I’m sorry I didn’t realise what I was doing before you left. I thought I could move on with Sarah, but it’s not enough.”

Kirsten frowned. “I don’t understand.”

“God, you’re going to make me get down on my knees aren’t you?” Jamie smiled. “I don’t want this to be over, Kirsten. I want to make things right between us. I miss you.”

He pressed her fingers to his lips. “I love you and I need you with me.” He smiled before he added, “With us.”

Kirsten, despite Jamie’s confession was still confused. “Beth said you were with someone else. I don’t understand how you can say these things to me-”

Jamie’s laughter cut her off. “No, Beth didn’t say I was with someone else.” He looked down at her and waited for the penny to drop.

Kirsten thought back to the exact words Beth had spoken. “Oh.” Realisation dawned on her as she turned a bright shade of red.

“She really is quite fond of you.”

“You were there when she was talking to me?”

His face lit up into a cheeky smile. “Ah-huh.”

“You bastard.” Kirsten batted Jamie on the chest with her free hand, but the grin on her face said everything. Jamie clutched her other hand and pulled her to him. “You set this up and Beth was in on it?”

“Everyone was. We all miss you. Beth knows how I feel about you, and so does Sarah. But I don’t want you to think that’s why I’m here. I made this decision on my own.” Jamie smiled. “So, say something.”

“Well, you’ll have to repeat it now because all that time you were making that speech I was standing here thinking about you with someone else. What was it you wanted to tell me?”

Jamie groaned. “Jesus, Kirsty. You’re going to make me work for it aren’t you? I love you Kirsty.” As he whispered the last four words Kirsten’s heart pounded in her chest.

“I want us to try again.”

“Well,” she started with a teasing tone, “I might have to think about it for a while.”

Jamie bent his head and touched his lips softly to hers. She slid her arms around his neck and kissed him back with an urgency that sent a message clear enough for anyone to understand. “I love you too, Jamie.”

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Jamie murmured as they touched their foreheads together.

“On one condition.” Kirsten smiled.

“Oh?”

“Don’t ever buy me a green halter dress.”

Jamie chuckled. “I think I can handle that.”

Kirsten looked up into his face. She hadn’t realised until now just how much she had missed him; his big green eyes, his wayward smile, his tall lazy gait and soft touch.

“I have a condition too though.” Jamie smiled.

“And what is that?”

Jamie reached into his pocket and took the earrings out again. Kirsten smiled and took them from his fingers. The moment she opened the velvet box she knew he had made a

switch while it had been in his pocket. A beautiful emerald glinted up at her under the foyer lights, set on a gold ring between two perfect diamonds.

“Jamie!”

Jamie looked pleased with himself. “Can I assume that’s another yes?”

Kirsten’s face said it all. In a voice she could hardly hear herself she mumbled, “Yes.”

As Jamie took her into his arms she cried, giant tears of joy that ran down her face and onto his collar.

She could hardly believe Jamie was back in her arms. When he took the ring from its holder and slipped it on her finger she gazed up at him. He stared back at her, puzzled. “What are you crying for?”

She giggled as she wiped the two tracks from her cheeks. “It’s not the first time you’ve made me cry, Jamie Grainger.”

He smiled. “And it won’t be the last. You know that, don’t you?”

“Of course.” She stood on her tiptoes and planted a kiss on the end of his nose. Never in a million years could she have dreamed that something so magical would come from everything that had happened over the past few months. She knew Jamie was right. They were both headstrong and stubborn and would butt heads constantly. But they had their whole lives to work on it. Anything they faced in the future would surely be a walk in the park compared to recent events. Somewhere deep down Kirsten hoped that everything they had been through had been a test, a test they had passed.

Now they could move on together as different people, with their own future ahead of them. Their story would be told proudly, not forgotten, hidden, or whispered in secret like others before theirs had.

About The Author

Paulette was born in Christchurch, New Zealand. At the age of nine her parents moved to the Kenepuru Sound, where she attended a small rural school. There she met a teacher who awoke in her a passion for writing, which continued into her teenage years. Often she would write vivid imaginings of shipwrecks on deserted islands involving her classmates, to stave off the boredom of their regimented boarding school life. Her writing waned when adulthood struck, leading her back to Christchurch to start work. She quickly became absorbed in the computer industry, having been given a golden opportunity for on the job training with a local firm. At the age of twenty her career met a fork in the road and she became a solo mother, a move which quickly saw her on a fast track to becoming the independent woman she is now. Her husband Tony, whom she met at the age of twenty-four would argue this was not always a good thing!

Together they have four children, one grandchild, two dogs, one cat and a healthy mortgage. An opportunity to attend a university course on creative writing was waved under her nose several years after they were married and she went on to attend the extended course also, giving her desire to write a much needed thrust back on track. Her first novel, Riding The Hurricane, was released in July 2008. She is an active member of Writing.com, and an avid supporter of local short story competitions, although longer works have always been her passion.

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16