The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Last night Lucy slept peacefully—dreaming of the almost kiss, soothed by the hope of a first kiss. Today, she closed her eyes and tried to imagine his arms around her and his lips on hers.

“Thanks for asking me along today.”

“I must make a small correction. I didn’t just ask you along; we both have work to do and I need you.” Her blush was immediate. She noticed Joe’s eyes. They were soft gray, almost pale, but right now they were darker, emitting a strong emotion.

Joe pulled to the side of the road and got out. Lucy wondered if they had a flat tire and was surprised when he opened her door and pulled her out onto the snow. With tenderness, Joe drew her to him. She didn’t have the sense to look away. She was locked in this moment and knew she’d carry it to her grave. His touch made her melt into him. His arms kept her from falling. Joe brought his lips within an inch of hers. He looked into her eyes as if asking if this was all right. Her breath caught in anticipation of what the next moment would bring. She wouldn’t turn away this time. The sun was high now, casting them in winter radiance. “Joe…”

His mouth prevented her from saying another syllable. This was their first kiss, happening right here at the side of the road just under the snowy boughs of tall pine trees. Joe kissed each hand, her neck and then her lips. He used his lips as one would use their fingers when plotting the way to go on a map. Then he gathered her even closer. She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him for all she was worth.

He stepped back and whistled. “We needed to get that out of the way.”

The Christmas Edition

The

Christmas

Edition

by

Robin Shope

The Christmas Edition

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales, is entirely coincidental.

The Christmas Edition

COPYRIGHT © 2008 by Robin Shope

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission of the author or The Wild Rose Press except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.

Contact Information: info@thewildrosepress.com

Cover Art by Kim Mendoza

The Wild Rose Press

PO Box 706

Adams Basin, NY 14410-0706

Visit us at www.thewildrosepress.com

Publishing History

First White Rose Edition, 2008

Print ISBN

Published in the United States of America

The Christmas Edition

Dedication

This series is dedicated to my husband Rick—

your presence makes the world

a far more interesting place to be.

Also to Kimberly and Matthew, who fill me with joy.

Special thanks to my editor, Lori Graham,

for your hard work and encouragement,

and to the real attorney, John Friedman,

for your “legalese.”

Finally, a shout out to my friend, Phillip Tomasso,

writing as Thomas Phillips.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter One

December 1

The usual winter blizzard blew into southern Wisconsin.

Lucy Collins carefully maneuvered her car through the snow that grew deeper with every gust of wind. She parked directly in front of her family owned business, The Turtle Creek Newspaper, just as her brother, Mike, was making his second pass at clearing away the snow from the drive with the snowblower.

“Hey, Mike! Help me carry these inside, will you?” Lucy called to him as she got out of her heated car. A sharp wind sucked up her words and nearly knocked her off balance.

Mike turned off the blower and cupped his hand around his ear. “What did you say?” His breath circled around his face in the frigid air.

“Help!” Lucy hollered. She popped the trunk and pivoted her body in an exaggerated fashion-the way models do when showcasing prizes on a game show. She stepped to the other side and waved her hands, palms up, along the food trays and her mother’s crystal punch bowl set. Then she flashed her younger brother her biggest smile.

Mike galloped up to the car just as another gust of wind, hammered snow at them. “It’s freezing out here! Even my nose hairs are frozen solid. You go on in. I’ll get these as soon as I’m finished shoveling the walk.”

“Thanks.” Lucy gave him a kiss on the cheek. To keep her balance, she gingerly walked across the crunchy ice crystals and into the warm building. Once inside, she tugged off one boot and then the other, dropping them under her desk. She hung her coat and scarf on the back of her swivel chair as she looked around at the decorations of wreaths and holly. A sprig of mistletoe hung over the empty desk at the back. That would surely go to waste. Music played loudly from her dad’s old stereo inside his office.

Christmas used to be her favorite holiday, but after a disastrous end to her engagement, a couple of years ago, this particular holiday now only served as a dark reminder of broken promises. With prayer and a loving family, Lucy was ready to start her life again, which meant buying her own place right after the first of the year. Working and living with the same people was often stifling, especially when they were her parents.

Lucy’s mom was the cheerleader as well as the gopher, making sure everyone had what they needed, whereas Lucy’s father focused persistently on getting the next edition out and on time.

Each year at Christmastime, however, Harold Collins took off his publisher hat and donned something completely different. The weeks wedged between Thanksgiving and Christmas became about assisting others. She loved it all and nothing could ever take her away from this life.

The employees had finished packing up the last of the boxes from the food drive which were now stacked neatly, ready to be dropped off at area shelters. Lucy wanted to acknowledge all the work they’d done. “For a small cluster of people, we sure accomplish a truckload of work, fast! These donations will help many people down and out this holiday season. Like all the other years we’ve worked closely together and done a great job.” Christmas was about unbridled joy but today, try as she may, she still wasn’t feeling it. Maybe she could fake it for everyone’s sake. Lucy lowered her head in modesty and stated, “This is going to be a Christmas of miracles.”

As if releasing faith into the air, everyone began to punctuate her words with applause. Right on cue, Harold Collins stepped out of his office wearing a hat something like one of the elves might wear. He even bobbed his head up and down to show off the cluster of bells that dangled at the tip of the loopy crown. Lucy couldn’t help but have her first laugh of the day, along with the other employees.

“I know it’s still weeks until Christmas but I thought you could use this now,” Harold said as he produced a fan of festive red and green envelopes.

Squeals of delight resonated as they opened the envelopes and saw the amount written on the checks but none was as loud as Ulilla Langston. Lucy’s dad had inherited her along with the paper. Ulilla was a beautiful, black woman with hair swept close to her head in a French twist. She carried weight around the place both literally and figuratively.

“Harold and Margaret Collins,” she crowed, as her hand fluttered to her chest. “No way can you afford to give us this.”

“Nonsense!” Harold blustered, and politely dismissed her words of protest with a wave. “It should be three times this and you know it! You all have worked effortlessly and clocked in many overtime hours in order to get the newspaper out each week. I am the one who is grateful. Merry Christmas!”

The bell above the front door jingled as Mike walked in balancing the punch bowl along with the holiday trays. “Where do you want these, sis?”

“Let me help with that.” Lucy took the top two trays. “Take the rest into the break room. I’ll follow you in.”

Margaret touched the sleeve of Lucy’s cardigan. “Have you finished our Christmas cards yet?”

“I started a month ago and finally finished them last night. Not only did I hand write each one, but the envelopes are addressed and stamped.”

“Which of the photographs did you decide on?”

“I thought I told you that all ready. Never mind, there’s one in my desk I’ll show you.” Lucy set down the trays. From the desk drawer, she took a single envelope and handed it to her mother. “Here, I was looking for something that would embody a perfect form of truth when it comes to Christianity.”

Margaret stared at the card. A country church was nestled into a hillside surrounded on all sides by fresh snowfall. Above, the sky was brilliant blue.

Lucy looked over her mother’s shoulder. She scrunched her face, second-guessing her photographic choice. “Does it look okay?”

“It’s a whole lot more than okay. This is simply breathtaking and looks professionally done. Lucy, you should have put your logo somewhere on this card so people would be aware that you are the one who took this photograph of our church.” Margaret’s eyes glistened.

“Not this time. I want people to focus on the birth of our Savior and the hope He gives for our lives. Mom, in the past year, I have become more appreciative of the upbringing you and Dad gave Mike and me and how you shared your faith which has now become mine.” Lucy choked back her tears and touched the silver cross she always wore at her neckline.

“Those words are the best gift you could ever give to me.” Margaret hugged her daughter. “I want nothing more this season than to see you happy.”

Lucy hugged back tightly. “I’m working hard on that.”

“Lucy!” Mike called from the break room. “I thought you said you were following me in. I’m making a mess of things trying to get the food set up.”

“Ah, I better go rescue the food from Mike and start the punch.” Lucy picked up the trays. “By the way, it’s getting worse outside so could you suggest to Dad that we should let everyone go home early.”

“I will, but right now, I want to lend you a hand.”

Lucy and Mike uncovered the trays of fruit, cheese, and crackers. Margaret took her home baked pastries from the refrigerator and arranged them on top of doilies set on antique dessert plates. Mike dumped plastic forks from the box into a basket and then tore open the plates while Lucy poured the punch into the bowl and added scoops of sherbet. “I think we’re ready.”

Once everyone had gathered in the break room, Harold asked one and all to join hands. Together they asked for the Lord’s blessing. Then they dug in; plates were quickly filled with condiments, the routine appetizers, rolled pieces of meat, decorated sugar cookies, and cinnamon rolls. That was just for starters. Margaret kept laying out more and more food.

Lucy sat at the edge of her chair and sipped her cup of punch. It was fun watching everyone enjoy themselves. She closed her eyes and drank in their laughter. This is what she needed, to be surrounded by such love and acceptance.

The employees had all worked for her father for years, so she not only knew their names but their spouses and children. This is what she loved about the business. It wasn’t work. It was family. At times they even squabbled like it, too.

When there were only a few squares of cantaloupe and crumbs of her mother’s cake left, Lucy suggested, “Before we go home for the weekend, let’s go around the room and name one gift we want for Christmas. No limitations on the gift. Miss Ulilla, would you like to start?”

The society column woman was clearly pleased to go first. In her world, this was the correct order of the universe and she didn’t even try to suppress her smile. Instead she brushed crumbs from her bosom, cleared her throat and stood to her feet. “Since Lucy removed the limitations, what I really want for Christmas are tickets for a Caribbean cruise under my tree this year.”

“That’s sounds exciting. I feel pretty confident you can talk Abe here into going along with you.” Lucy gave the elderly custodian a wink. It was no secret Abe had been after Ulilla for as long as she could remember, but Ulilla always put him off.

Abe stepped right in without being asked, “The gift I am wishing for is that I can buy those tickets for Ulilla. One for her and one for me. Separate cabins, of course.” He turned beet red.

After the laughter died down, Lucy went on to ask her best friend, “What about you, Monica?”

“I’m hoping for money. Lots and lots of money.”

“Here I thought you’d ask for perfume. The French kind,” Mike said. His lips slowly curled into a slow smile. For the first time, Lucy caught something in the air between her best friend and her brother and it wasn’t perfume. French or otherwise.

Harold set down his plastic plate with a hollow thump. “The gift I want this year cannot be found under my tree.”

“Harold.” Margaret touched his arm. “This isn’t the time.”

“I think it is, Maggie. After being a family owned business for the last fifty years, first with my Papa and now on my own, it’s no secret I want to keep that other newspaper from coming here. Living in a small town like Turtle Creek, we can’t withstand the extra competition. We can barely make it as it is. We need to come up with some ideas of how we’re going to generate more sales, increase our advertisers and get more subscribers.” He pulled off his elf hat and lowered his eyes. His thumb rubbed a finger as he spoke. “Or this might just be the last time we stand together like this for Christmas.” To everyone’s dismay, Harold had spit out his worrying words. They spread across the room.

Lucy frowned. Everything her dad said was the truth. They all knew it.

“My turn!” Lucy picked up her father’s hat and pulled it down over her ears. Everyone laughed. “My Christmas gift is to hire a new editor who will knock the socks off our readers with his fresh ideas and perspective!”

“And how will you know this editor when he comes through the front door?” Carol from advertising asked.

“Because…” Lucy tapped her chin in thought. “The man I have prayed for will write with heart.” Unexpected tears gathered along the edges of her eyes. The end of her nose tingled. “Anyone who can move an audience with words is going to increase circulation which will attract businesses to grab ad space and make readers buy our paper.” She touched her cross. I have my faith in you, Lord .

The front door jingled. Monica looked out into the office. “Hey, guys, there’s an awesome looking guy standing at the front counter. I believe Lucy’s gift just arrived. Quick Lucy, say another prayer while you have God’s attention.”

Lucy walked out of the break room with shoulders squared, back straight. There he stood. Tall, with sandy brown hair and wickedly wonderful eyes. Cherry cheeks, too, thanks to the frosty weather. His gray eyes were unsettling. He stood on one foot and tapped one shoe against the other to knock off the snow. Then he repeated the process with the other shoe. Monica was right. He was a looker.

“How may I help you?” Lucy folded her hands together and placed them on the counter.

“I’m looking for Lucy Collins.” He stared her in the eyes.

“You’ve found her.” Lucy heard laughter. She turned around to see the doorway to the break room was crowded with faces. All eyes were pinned on them. Of course, she had to put on a good show for them. Lucy turned back around and faced him. Feeling cocky, she said, “I know why you’re here.”

“You do?” he seemed startled.

“Yes, you’re here about the ad I placed in this week’s paper for an editor.”

His chin dropped and he was speechless for a moment. “You’re…absolutely right. I did see it advertised.” The man set his briefcase down and popped it open. He started shuffling around the inside of it. Papers rustled. Finally, he looked up sheepishly. He had worried eyes. “I seem to have forgotten my resume. Not a good way to start a job interview. By the way, I’m Joe McNamara.”

Lucy shook his hand and then reached under the counter for an application. She clamped it down on a clipboard, slipped a pen underneath and handed it to him. “I don’t need your resume but I do need to know if you can write. When you’re done filling this out, I want you to write an editorial for me.” She slid a blank piece of paper toward him.

“On what subject?” He scratched the end of his nose.

“You’re the editor so you get to decide.” She slapped her hand down on the paper.

Joe nodded and then looked around for a place to sit. He chose a chair from the waiting area. Lucy watched him as he read the application and then thoughtfully filled in the blanks. Every now and then he looked up and caught her staring at him. He smiled but she quickly looked away.

The Turtle Creek Newspaper employees began to quickly leave. “Don’t stay too long, Lucy, or you’ll be trapped in here for the weekend,” Abe warned her on the way out. For the first time ever, Ulilla was on his arm.

“I won’t be much longer. I am dreaming of a cozy fire with hot chocolate.”

“That’s only one of the things I’m dreaming of!” Ulilla gushed as she plunged through the doorway. Shocked over Ulilla’s sudden change of heart, Lucy couldn’t help but stare.

Finally Joe stood to his feet and handed the clipboard back to her, the pen returned to the same position as when she had handed it to him. Now it was Joe’s turn to slide the paper across the counter to her. Lucy looked at it. Maybe she missed something. She flipped it over. Both sides were blank. She looked at Joe quizzically.

“May I?” he asked nodding toward one of the computers.

“Be my guest.” Lucy granted permission and then caught her reflection in a window. She quickly pulled off the Santa hat. Static electricity popped around her head like a lightning rod. She knew she was blushing and really hoped he wouldn’t notice.

Lucy watched as his long fingers flew across the keyboard. Her keyboard. The tips of the fingers hit the center of the keys with great accuracy. Tap-tap-tap the keys sank and rose again. She was close enough to see the words without her glasses and didn’t see any red squiggly lines. At least the fella could spell.

“Psst!” Monica called from the break room.

Lucy turned around. “What?” she mouthed silently.

With frantic movements, Monica motioned for Lucy to come talk to her. When Lucy walked into the room, everyone huddled around. “We need details.”

Lucy gave a deep sigh happy to oblige. “His name is Joe McNamara. According to his application, he’s from Chicago, so I guess he must be relocating. He’s trying out for our paper by writing an editorial for me.”

“Good idea,” Harold said while cramming the last sugar cookie into his mouth.

“Why would he want to apply for a job with us?” Mike asked suspiciously as he tied the top of a plastic garbage bag closed.

“That’s easy to answer. We are the best newspaper in the entire southern lakes region,” Harold answered shooting bits of cookie from his mouth like falling stars.

“Yea, right,” Mike panned as he tossed the bag on top of the other bags.

“You have to start at a small paper and work your way up to get into a big city paper,” Monica explained as she slipped on her winter coat. Then she winked at Mike. “He’s getting his start right here with us.”

“Whoa, first I have to hire him, and once he hears what the pay is, he may just hop back on the Interstate.”

“Finished,” a male voice spoke.

Everyone turned to see Joe standing just feet away, holding out his paper.

Lucy hoped he hadn’t heard everything. She snatched the paper from him and furrowed her brow. “That was fast.”

“Not when you have something burning inside that you feel passionately about.”

She held it between her fingers and read aloud.

Saying Goodbye

by Joseph McNamara

What will I ever do without Café Books?

Ever since the announcement that the independent bookseller was going out of business, I've been a mess. The big chain stores serve a purpose, sure, but they don't contain the atmosphere and warmth that emulates from the owners of Café Books. When I walk into their shop, it's like visiting family. Mr. and Mrs. Myers always greet me and everyone, with a genuine smile, and when are they not armed with a recommendation for a new title they know I'll enjoy? Just for me. They notice me. Me.

Café Books is where I first went whale hunting with Melville and frog collecting with Steinbeck. How can I forget all the murderous adventures I shared with my good friend, Mike Hammer, or faced a scary, yet Brave New World with Huxley? I’ve read more than books on the leather sofa at Café Books. I've made friends. Lived a million different lives. Cried countless tears. And have laughed out loud so often, and so hard, that my stomach still aches from the memories alone.

How does one say goodbye to such a place?

I started patronizing Café Books just off Kenzie Avenue in Chicago about two years ago. And so when the owners announced suddenly it would be going out of business and closing its door yesterday, I made it a point to stop by.

The room was busy with faithful shoppers who felt this place was a stabilizing source in their community. Lexie Jacobson, a 28-year-old hairstylist, scooped up discount novels and a couple of CDs. “I’m sure going to miss this place,” she said with a shake of her head. She was not alone with this feeling.

“It’s hard to find bookstores that are not part of a national chain,” 35-year-old school teacher Samantha Jones said with a sigh.

The sentiment was expressed again and again by dozens of patrons.

In the never-ending search for bigger and better, give me the small and unique. Meet me at Café Books. Help me say goodbye.

No one spoke. Lucy couldn’t take her eyes from the page. The words evoked warmth and sentiment. It was more than she had hoped for. He was it. This was her Christmas gift.

It wasn’t the first sight of him that did it. It wasn’t the endearing way he drummed his thigh with the pen when he was nervously trying to figure out what to write down on his application that formed her opinion. Nor even his calm manner as he slid his fingers across her keyboard that made the difference. It was his words. These words. They were simple and brilliant. Words that had taken the breath from her soul. She looked up at him with new eyes. He got her—yet how could that happen when they only met minutes ago.

“Wow.” She gulped.

“Well, it was spontaneous.” Joe uneasily tugged at his collar. “If I had more time, I could have done much better.”

They smiled at each other as if there was more to the words that hung in the air. Her mind was wandering where it shouldn’t. “I need to clarify something.”

“Clarify away, Ms. Collins.”

“Lucy.”

“Lucy,” he repeated in a sweet tone.

“Um, we can’t afford to pay you much. It’s obvious you’re quite gifted so I’m not sure we’re what you’re looking for in a newspaper.”

“The experience is what is valuable here.”

“How much notice do you need to give your old place?” Harold stepped forward to ask. “The sooner you can start the better.”

“Dad!” Lucy cut in as blood rushed to her face.

“Ah, my schedule is pretty well wide open, sir. I can start as soon as I’m needed, that is if I am hired. I really don’t need much—a roof over my head and...a new start.”

Lucy saw it in his eyes. He wasn’t kidding.

“You know, Harold, there is the small apartment above our garage. Mr. McNamara could stay there until he finds another place,” Margaret reminded him.

“I’ll take it,” Joe was quick to accept.

A gust of wind whipped through the building when Monica opened the door. “Better get a move on, people. I just heard on the radio that the Interstate is closed down. The town is pretty well socked in. It’s time for us to lock up and head for our homes. I love you all but no way do I want to be stuck in here with you.”

Everyone went for their coats.

“I better take you home, so I know you made it safely,” Mike told Monica.

“If you shovel my walk too, there might be a reward in it for you.” Monica winked as she nudged his side with her elbow.

“I love rewards.”

“Mike, don’t be long. There are Christmas boxes in the attic I need for you to get down for me,” Margaret said following her son out to the parking lot. “We’re decorating the tree tonight and you can’t miss it.” She shut the door behind them.

“Ah, is there something you want me to sign? A contract or something?” Joe asked, quickly looking from Harold to Lucy.

“I never thought about a contract,” Lucy said, wondering if they had anything that resembled a contract.

“We don’t do contracts here. A shake of my hand is how I operate.” Harold slid his arm down through his winter jacket and out the opening. “You better come along with us. You’ll never get back to the city tonight.”

With a simple handshake, Lucy Collins’ day took a new direction.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Two

By the time they walked out of the office, Lucy and Joe’s cars were the only two left in the parking lot. She fished in her purse and in her pocket for her keys but couldn’t find them.

“Come on, ride with me,” Joe coaxed.

Lucy pulled back. “Maybe I should go back inside to find them.”

“Suit yourself.” He shrugged. “I’ll wait for you here.”

When Lucy pulled on the office door, she remembered she had set it on an automatic lock system. Since her dad had the actual turnkey with him today, there would be no going back inside for anything. There was one ride home this afternoon and Joe was it.

Lucy climbed into Joe’s car, trembling from the inside out. Her stomach felt tight and her heart was pounding. She couldn’t remember the last time she felt this giddy or nervous. It was a vulnerable feeling she wasn’t used to. After all she wasn’t a teenager anymore and this certainly wasn’t a date. Joe was simply driving her from point A to point B and staying the night—at her house.

Before he even started the car, he reached for her. She drew back in alarm.

“Sorry, but you’ve got snow all over your face and hair. May I?”

She gave her permission with a nod of her head.

Joe brushed snow from her cheeks with his fingertips. Then he slid the key into the ignition and turned on the heat. Lucy huddled in the seat trying to stay warm while Joe went back out to clear the windows. She knew she should offer to help but the gusts of wind were stronger now. Joe got back in the car and held his hands out to the heater. After a few minutes, he slipped the car in gear and they were on their way stirring up even more waves of snow.

“Are you warm enough?” he asked her while keeping his eyes on the road.

“I’m fine now,” she croaked out her answer as the words dried up in her throat. She couldn’t help but notice Joe biting back his amusement at her. It made her glower straight ahead at the road in front of them.

Joe drove cautiously as Lucy gave him turn-by-turn directions. On the crest of a winding road, the car did a sideways spin but he was able to bring the car to a stop before going off the road. Just as Joe had the vehicle under control, he gave it a bit too much gas, which sent them into a tailspin.

Lucy white-knuckled the dashboard as the car came to a stop.

“Okay. Now I get it. I think I will coast for a bit,” Joe said determinedly.

He was unflappable. She looked over at him as he appeared fairly calm and found herself impressed.

“Turn here at the next roadside mailbox on your right.” Lucy pointed. “Our place is behind these trees.”

Joe turned too sharply and ended up stuck in a snowdrift. He was able to back out easily and then followed the drive along until they reached the medium sized cabin with steam pumping up from the chimney. “Looks like my folks have the fire going all ready.” She was out of the car before he could free his seatbelt.

“Come on!” she called to Joe over her shoulder as she hopped through the thick snow blowing across the yard. They reached the porch at the same time. “I didn’t mean to be rude by running on ahead, but it’s too cold out here to lag behind just for the sake of being well-mannered.” She laughed as she opened the door for him revealing a living room of log walls and leather furniture.

Center stage was a picturesque eight-foot-tall Douglas fir rising from the floor in a splendid pyramidal shape. The top of it reached the tallest part of the vaulted ceiling. The scent of the fir reached into every corner of the cabin and was intoxicating, awakening feelings and memories of past holidays.

The living room and kitchen had been combined into a single room as an open floor plan, years before it was popular to do so.

“Right after dinner, we’re trimming the tree. You got stranded here just in time to help us,” Margaret informed Joe as she set fat pieces of chicken down into the hot oil. It sizzled and spat hot grease everywhere. Margaret clucked her tongue and began wiping up the mess with her dishrag.

“But it’s still weeks until Christmas. What’s the hurry?” Joe asked, handing his coat to Lucy who in turn hung it in the closet.

“What’s the hurry?” Lucy repeated as if he was daft. “Because it’s almost Christmas!”

“That explains it.” Joe’s smile was charming. He took a seat near the fire across from Harold. “You have a nice place here, sir.”

“Thank you; I appreciate that. I can tell just by looking at you that you are a fine fellow. Tell us something about yourself,” Harold asked over the top of his paper.

“Nothing much to tell. Just another guy looking for work. And I found it, thanks to you,” he answered. “I honor your handshake.”

Lucy started setting the table. “Have you lived in the city all of your life?”

“As far as I can remember,” he answered over his shoulder.

There was the sound from down the hallway of boxes being dropped from a height. “Look out below!” someone hollered as another box hit the floor.

“Mike! Those noises I heard better not be the ornaments.”

“Don’t worry, Mom. I checked the boxes before I dropped ’em down.” Mike appeared holding two boxes and shuffling a larger one along with his feet. When he saw Joe in the living room, he stopped short. His words were like a machete. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”

“The roads are closed, Mike.” Lucy mouthed, be nice.

Mike’s look told her that was not about to happen. After he set the boxes by the tree, he sat on the armrest of the couch, a few feet away from Joe. Mike continued whacking away, “Tell us, Joe, what compels you to want to work for us at the paper?”

Joe bristled. “Other than it’s a new challenge for me, I have never lived in a rural community and thought it might be a nice change.”

“Change from what?”

“From living in the city!” Lucy answered for him, suddenly feeling protective of Joe. She hated her brother’s insinuations. “You know…smog versus clean air. Traffic jams versus...”

“Cow piles!” Mike finished for her. His laugh was hollow. “Of all the towns in all of Wisconsin, why did you come here to our town?”

“Why not your town?”

“Enough! Enough!” Margaret tossed her dishrag and hit Mike in the face with it. “Chew on that until dinner. Please remember that Mr. McNamara is our guest and newest employee. That makes him part of the family now. We do not want to scare him off before he even starts.”

“You’ll have to forgive my brother,” Lucy told Joe. “He didn’t get any of the Collins charm.”

“It’s really all right.” Joe laughed. “Actually, I admire Mike’s protective nature. I’d feel the same way if the situation were reversed. If you want to know something about me, I’ll tell you, but I must warn you, it’s quite boring.”

“I’ll be the judge of that,” Mike said pertly, tossing the wet rag back and forth between his two hands.

Joe didn’t hesitate for one minute. “I’ve lived in Chicago all my life. Went to Wheaton college and one of my undergraduate degrees is in journalism but never had a chance to use it until now. I have always wanted to be a writer so thought this might be a good way for me to start.”

“I agree!” Margaret nodded with delight.

“Your application said you worked in a hospital,” Lucy said. “Being a file clerk must be boring work for a writer.”

“I’d hardly refer to myself as a writer, but I am definitely ready for a career change.”

“I take it you’re single,” Margaret flatly commented.

“Yes, ma’am, I am.” Joe glanced back at Lucy who suddenly felt herself growing flush. She walked to the kitchen and turned her back on the men. Humming, she pretended to be busy while continuing to listen.

“Then you’ve come to the right place! Our metropolis of Turtle Creek is just teaming with single ladies,” Mike chided with a slap on his knee. “There must be at least five spinsters in a ten mile radius.”

“Don’t you ever know when to stop talking?” Harold batted his paper at his son.

Dinner was eaten quietly. The juicy chicken, buttery broccoli and salad took precedence over any conflict. Joe helped clean up the kitchen once the meal was finished.

“Time for the fun part,” Margaret called clapping her hands together. “Let’s trim our Christmas tree.”

Harold put on some Christmas music and started looking around for something. “Lucy what did you do with my hat?”

“I left it back at the office.” She pouted. “Sorry.”

“Auk! I’ll make due without it,” Harold complained as he began going through the Christmas boxes. One particular box troubled him. When he opened it, he frowned. Then he smiled as an idea crossed his brow. “Joe, it has always been a tradition in our family for me to untangle the lights.” Harold reached down into the oversized cardboard box and soon held a huge ball of cords with bulbs. “But this year, it’s my pleasure to give up this happiness and pass it along to you.”

Joe scratched his head. “I’ll do my best, sir.” He sat on the floor and began straightening the cords from what seemed like miles of tangled string. When he finished, Joe strung the lights on the tree.

“It’s time,” Margaret announced. With gentle care, she placed several mid-sized boxes on top of the coffee table. “Here is what we look forward to all year long—opening our special ornaments and remembering joyful times.”

“What are special ornaments?”

“Every Christmas, my parents purchase a new ornament for the tree that is reflective of something special from the past year,” Lucy explained to Joe. “Mike and I share this family tradition by doing the same thing, now that we are older.”

“Someday Lucy and Mike will decide to settle down and leave our house. They’ll take their memories with them into their new life,” Harold further explained, “in the form of the ornaments they have collected all these years.”

“That’s a very nice tradition.” Joe nodded.

The Collins family sat in a circle with Joe at Lucy’s side. One by one, each of them gingerly removed the tissue paper revealing glass ornaments.

“This one is from Harold and I’s first Christmas together.” Margaret smiled broadly and held up the couple ice-skating with their arms around one another. Everyone smiled enjoying the moment. Although Lucy had heard this same story for the last twenty-six years, it remained a highlight of each Christmas.

Margaret hung the ornament on the tree. “I think we have traveled through our marriage like this, holding one another up, staying close and occasionally slipping on slick ice.”

“I’ve always loved that one but this one is my favorite.” Lucy’s fingers slid across the glass house with a red roof as she hung her ornament on the tree.

Joe looked into one of the packing boxes. Inside was a smaller box. A gold one. He reached for it, removed the lid and set it to the side. Joe took out a glass heart the size of a small hand with the words ‘I will always love you’ printed across the front. “Hey, what’s the story behind this ornament?”

Immediately, Lucy’s mood changed and she recoiled from him. “Put it back,” Lucy spoke sharply.

Margaret stepped in between the boxes and took the heart from Joe’s hand. She handled it roughly, not at all like the others. She returned it to the box without rewrapping it. It hit the bottom with a plunk. Lucy wouldn’t have cared if it broke.

“Forgive me. I feel I’ve done something wrong.”

“No you haven’t. It’s all right, really it is, Joe.” The memory burned and Lucy did her best to push it aside. She forced a smile as the family returned to decorating.

When the story telling was over, over a hundred ornaments covered the branches.

“This old man is tired. It’s way past my bedtime so I shall say goodnight to all.” Harold wrapped one arm around his wife’s waist and walked her down the hall toward their bedroom, singing Deck the Halls . Mike said his goodnight and ran up the stairs two at a time.

Lucy looked across the room at Joe. An awkward silence grew between them as the room emptied. Maybe she should go on up to bed and let Joe get his sleep, but she wanted a bit of alone time with him first. Besides she wasn’t sleepy. Not a bit.

“Time for hot chocolate.” Lucy announced as she went to the kitchen. From a cupboard, she took out a pan and set it on a burner. Then she went through another cupboard gathering two kinds of chocolate squares and a bag of brown sugar. Next out was the milk from the refrigerator. She lined up her ingredients on the counter. “I love the winter months when I have an excuse to drink all the hot chocolate I want, like right now. I have been dreaming about this moment the entire day. Can I make you some, too?”

Joe swiveled his chair around and looked across the room at Lucy. “Oh, please don’t bother on my account.”

“No, bother. I’m making some for myself and can just as easily make an extra cup.” She held up two mugs with snowmen on them.

“It’s just that I am really particular about my hot chocolate.” He grimaced.

“Oh?” Lucy began breaking up the squares of real chocolate. “How so?”

“It’s gotta be topped with whipped cream.”

“But, of course! Whoever came up with the idea of serving it with a blobby marshmallow should be shot, or at least be sent to culinary school. Marshmallows only belong at campfires squished between chocolate and graham crackers.” She stuck out her tongue in distaste.

“On my hot chocolate, I prefer the whipped cream to be at least…”

“Three inches tall?” Lucy finished. “And I make hot chocolate with a splash of my secret ingredient.”

“A secret ingredient? This sounds mysterious.” Joe laughed.

“I make my hot chocolate with squares of real chocolate. No mixes for me. So it needs a bit of vanilla to smooth out the bitter bite of chocolate.”

“Hey, that does sound good. I’d like to try it, if you’re sure you don’t mind.” Joe got up from where he was seated and crossed the room. “Do you sprinkle cinnamon over the top of the whipped cream?”

“Cinnamon? Hmmm.” Lucy went after the spice. “I do now.” She had to chuckle to herself at finding something fun that they had in common. It wasn’t enough to build a relationship on, but it was a good start nonetheless.

Lucy made their hot drink, added a splash of vanilla, and then kept her finger pressed down hard on the trigger of the whipped cream until it was three layers thick. Last went a mild sprinkling of the cinnamon. She carefully handed Joe his mug, keeping an eye on the whipped cream so it didn’t fall over the side.

After they made themselves comfortable back in the living room, they toasted by the fire.

“Here’s to The Turtle Creek Newspaper ’ s new employee, a man of discerning hot chocolate tastes. I salute you!” Lucy raised her mug.

“And here’s to my new job. I salute you back!” With his drink in hand, Joe reached across the hassock separating them and gently clicked mugs with her. Then he took a little sip from the edge of the cup. Whipped cream got on his upper lip. He left it there as he went back for a second taste, this one much larger. Afterward, he wiped his mouth with a paper Santa napkin. “Ah, Ms. Collins this is very good, or should I call you Boss?”

Lucy pretended to be thinking hard on this one. “You can call me Boss but only when we’re alone like this.” She winked.

“Well, then Boss, you can call me Ace.”

“Fair enough, Ace” Lucy agreed.

“And you have spoiled my taste buds for any other hot chocolate.”

A maverick piece of curly blond hair fell over Lucy’s brow. “This is fun. I am glad you stayed overnight. It’s kind-of like having a pajama party.” Suddenly, Lucy realized she had said the wrong thing and blushed. “I’ve got a confession to make about earlier tonight, when we were opening the ornaments.” She stopped herself from speaking by taking a sip of her drink. Nervously, Lucy touched the cross she wore around her neck. She stalled. Pulled back. Maybe she shouldn’t say what she felt like saying after all. Yesterday, at this time, she didn’t even know who Joe was. Opening up to him like this was wrong.

Joe sat quietly in the glow of the fire. A few embers popped and broke in two. Lucy liked that he didn’t press her to speak, sensing she had changed her mind over the confession. The words dried up in her throat. Lucy reached for her mug and drank the rest. She yawned. “Never mind.” She waved her thoughts away. “This time of the year makes me a bit sad and nostalgic.” She rubbed her achy elbow.

“Is there something wrong with your elbow?” Joe asked. “I’ve noticed you rubbing it a few times.”

“I fell on the ice and broke it last year. Sometimes it still aches. Like now.”

“Did they put it in a cast at the time?”

“No. The bone doctor said I might loose movement and put me in a sling for a few weeks.”

Joe moved the hassock in front of Lucy and sat down. He held out his hands. “May I?”

“Okay.” Lucy granted permission by holding out her arm. She wasn’t sure what Joe had in mind.

Joe took Lucy by the wrist and laid the back of her hand on his knee. Gently, he straightened her arm. “How does that feel?”

“It hurts.” She grimaced.

“You need to exercise your arm like that several times a day,” Joe told her as he placed her arm back on her knee. He stood up from the hassock and returned to his chair.

“How do you know about bones?” Lucy inquired.

“I worked in a hospital as a…”

“File clerk. Now I remember.”

“It got lonely so I did a lot of reading.” Joe took a few sips and looked at the fire. “A few minutes ago you said you felt sad.”

“Did I? I really don’t remember.” Lucy uneasily repositioned herself on the couch by tucking her legs up underneath her.

“Yes, you did. You said this time of the year makes you sad.” He moved to the edge of his chair. “It’s all right, Lucy. A lot of people get depressed over the holidays. It’s very common. Would you like to talk about it?”

A wealth of tears wanted to spring forward. She couldn’t hold them back for much longer. No way would she discuss something so personal with someone she had just met. She didn’t want to listen to Joe’s mutterings of sympathy. That would be pointless. All anyone had ever offered to her about Steve were meaningless words. Her fiancée was gone. Their relationship ended two years ago at this time of the year. Since she didn’t want to discuss it, there was no other choice but to get out of here. “It’s late. I guess I better get to bed.” She got up and took linens from the closet and set them on the couch. “We’ll have the garage apartment cleaned out for you by the time you get back, but for tonight, this will have to do. I hung a towel for you in the bathroom down the hall. It’s the blue one.”

“Thanks for your hospitality. As for cleaning out the apartment, please don’t bother. I can do that myself.”

“Mother would never hear of it.” Lucy walked to the stairs and turned around. “Sleep well, Joe McNamara.”

“I will, Lucy Collins.” He smiled up at her. “I mean, Boss.”

She walked soundlessly up the steps. She knew which ones squeaked and avoided them. In her bedroom, she looked through her window at the frozen lake with the pageant of winter stars above. The blizzard had passed hours ago but she hadn’t noticed until now. The roads would be cleared before morning. She set her alarm clock to be sure she was up before Joe left.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Three

December 2

His pet peeve was saying goodbye. To anyone. So he didn’t say goodbye to the Collins family either. He simply got up before dawn, folded the sheet and blanket meticulously, left them on the couch and cleaned the kitchen, too. He was no slouch.

In bare feet, he padded across the living room floor and parted the plastic blinds to have a look outside. The blizzard had long since passed. Good. It was important to hit the road before rush hour. By now, snowplows were busy moving snow off the roads. He expected nothing but clear driving between here and Chicago.

He looked at the apartment windows above the three-car garage. The shades were drawn but he felt the place was waiting for him. Joe McNamara chuckled. Soon, he’d be living right there with a bird’s eye view of the Collins’ place. That meant he’d only be a few yards away from her. Lucy. He smiled each time he thought about her. This was not at all what he had in mind the morning he drove into Turtle Creek, Wisconsin, population—2,000. At the time he was only passing through. Spending a couple of hours at the most. But staying? That part was unplanned. He called it a bonus and smiled again.

Who’da ever thought I’d be so lucky? Living right here with them at “home sweet home.” Home was personal. It meant more than working beside her at the office, although that would be good, too. He’d learn everything he needed to know about the family, the paper, and most of all, about Lucy.

Joe felt good about the night before when he shifted the conversation from him and redirected it to them. He didn’t identify with them at all during their happy talk and boxes of silly ornaments.

Of course, it had been hard to concentrate on their talk or ornaments, when all he could do was look toward Lucy’s eyes. He had never seen a woman with eyes quite like hers. They were like the hoarfrost of winter with promises of spring. When she smiled, it was like ice melted around the place. When he looked at her, he could almost see her soul. It was pure and white—a frightening specter to him. He stared at her so much he finally felt he needed to apologize. He wanted her to open up and tell him things she had never uttered to another human being.

But what was most intriguing of all was when she began to open up. Lucy seemed ready to talk but a deep sadness seemed to stymie her. He had to find out what that was all about. He knew enough about human nature not to push right now; he’d work hard to earn her trust. Then she’d tell him everything. It always worked that way for him.

In the meantime, he had to remain in control. Control was all he had left. If Lucy weakened that defense, what would he do?

He brought himself up short and made his mind move to when they actually met the day before. He had nearly lost it when she mentioned the editorial job. It caught him totally off balance. Yes, he had researched the area, the family, and the newspaper many times, perhaps hundreds of times, finding out what he could. He had read the job posting for an editor but thought nothing about it. He was reaching into his briefcase for something else when she said she knew why he had come. It made his heart stop until she opened her mouth and kept talking. Ah, he was here to be the editor. Yes. He did have that undergraduate degree—journalism. He didn’t tell her about the rest of his education because it would be too easy for her to connect the dots. However, he did tell the truth on the application—at least as far as it went.

Now he had to work fast before the family got up. Joe got on his shoes and quietly opened the closet for his coat. Then, holding his keys in a tight fist so they wouldn’t make a noise, he slowly turned the knob to open the front door. To his surprise, he found it unlocked. Was this a habit or an oversight?

Good, the wind had stopped. He rushed over the top of the snowdrifts to his car. He’d start the SUV at the last minute, not taking the chance to wake them prematurely as they’d surely keep him here for hours longer.

Swiftly, he moved from window to window and brushed the snow away before scraping at the ice underneath. He got in and turned the key in the ignition. Thankfully, the engine started right up. Slowly, he drove to the end of the driveway where he turned right toward the Interstate. There were loose ends in the city that needed his attention.

On the road back to Chicago, he knew he was about to learn a lot more about Lucy Collins and a whole lot more about himself because of her. If he were smart, he would leave them alone, but Joe McNamara wasn’t feeling so smart these days. His psychiatrist would attest to that. He wasn’t going back to the hospital—not ever. He had spent two years there on the psych ward and that was long enough. The needles, the drugs, and the horrible rantings of the insane still drilled holes in his mind.

****

The tapping on Lucy’s bedroom door woke her. She felt as though she hadn’t slept for more than a few hours. Cracking her eyes a bit she saw a sky filled with blue. She opened them further and wondered what happened to the dark sky and blizzard. Then she remembered Joe McNamara. He was the reason for the difficult sleep the night before and even now, he was only one floor below on her parent’s couch.

Now came the third tap on her door. It slowly opened. Lucy quickly sat up on her elbows expecting to see Joe, her smile brightening with the thought. Instead Mike stood in the opening.

“Just checking on you.”

“What time is it?” Lucy’s smile evaporated as she reached for her alarm clock.

“Seven.”

“Seven?” Lucy jumped out of bed and rummaged around for a bathrobe. She found it at the bottom of the bed and snatched it up.

“Don’t bother hurrying. He’s gone already.”

“Oh, no!” Lucy slipped the robe over her flannel nightgown and rushed downstairs. She looked through the kitchen window to the driveway. Sure enough his car was gone. The only thing left were tire tracks. Disappointment flooded her emotions. Lucy turned around and faced Mike. “You were very rude to Joe last night. He’s an employee of ours now and you will treat him with the utmost respect. Do you hear me?” She jabbed him hard in the stomach.

“There’s something about him I just don’t trust, sis,” Mike said. “He’s hiding something.”

“Well, after your shenanigans yesterday, I wouldn’t be a bit surprised, if once he got back to Chicago, he didn’t send us an email saying ‘after careful consideration, I’ve decided not to take the position with your little paper because of that offensive brat your parents named Mike Collins!’” Now she wagged her finger at him.

“It’d be fine with me if he did that.” Mike walked into the kitchen and poured himself a cup of coffee.

“Well, it wouldn’t be all right with me.” Lucy followed close behind him. “And it wouldn’t be all right with Mom or Dad. And it wouldn’t be all right with everyone at the paper. We need him.” Lucy stared at the pan and mugs she used for hot chocolate last night. They had been washed and set in the dish drain at the side of the sink. She hadn’t done that and was fairly sure Mike hadn’t either. Mike never carried his dishes to the sink let alone clean something. With her parents still in bed, it had to be Joe. He was thoughtful.

Mike blew on his coffee and then took his first sip. “Ahhhh, that is so good.” After his second sip, he said, “We’ll get by just fine without him.”

“I hope so because we just might have to do it without him.” She puffed out angrily.

“There’s something odd about him.”

She gave her brother a long look. There was an element of truth in Mike’s words but she hoped he was wrong.

“When he gets back to Turtle Creek, guard your heart.”

“You mean, if he comes back.”

“Oh, he’s coming back. I just have to figure out why he’s coming back.”

****

December 3

Back at his Chicago residence, Joe McNamara showered and changed clothes. He checked himself in the mirror. Although falling apart on the inside, he looked perfectly put together on the outside which was all that mattered, for now. Not only had he learned valuable techniques of dealing with perception but he had mastered them. Satisfied he was ready, he left the apartment and went to the office like any other normal entrepreneur in a suit and tie. He’d save his business causal for the newspaper. It was important to fit in when he got back to Turtle Creek.

Joe stepped into the elevator and pressed the round black button for the sixth floor. A couple of women standing to his side started sending him looks. Giggling. Whispers. Snickering now. Joe checked them out. There weren’t wedding or engagement rings on their well-manicured fingers. Still they wore plenty of bling.

He noticed the slightest things about people. Things no one else would think to note. Like the earring that had fallen from the blonde’s earlobe and now lay lodged in a fold of her blouse. There was a minute scuffmark on the side of a shoe worn by the second woman. Yes, he noticed everything, especially women when their make up and coiffed hair were perfect like on these two. It was a challenge to find something wrong about them but he always succeeded. No one was perfect and it thrilled him to discover what that was.

They tried too hard to be beautiful. It made him wonder what they were like au natural …like Lucy Collins was. One look and he knew she was decidedly not high maintenance. However, she came with other requirements that could be more deadly. Loyalty. Honesty. Commitment. He could handle fake women just fine; it was the sincere ones who rattled him.

The silver doors slid open. His floor. He stepped out in the welcome area, feeling almost like this was the first time he had done so, but he had walked this way for a couple of years.

“Good morning, Mr. McNamara,” the receptionist greeted.

“Morning, Phyllis.” Joe nodded and then went by her, heading for the back office. He stood for a moment in the doorway wondering if he was about to make a huge mistake by taking a leave of absence. His psychiatrist was within blocks of the office which was handy when his mind spiraled toward the dark tunnel again. Maybe he really should stay and work through all his issues.

On one hand, Angela Steel, his coworker and former girlfriend, knew he had been considering taking a leave of absence for some time and did all that was within her power to make him stay here, including offering him a partnership. On the other, his psychiatrist, Dr. Boshar, encouraged Joe to take time off and try to rekindle his passion for life. After spending a couple of days in Turtle Creek, he knew he needed to go with Dr. Boshar’s advice and he also knew just where that time off would be spent.

Joe stared at his framed diplomas on the wall. He didn’t think twice as he began taking them down.

“What are you doing?” Joe turned to discover Angela had come in the room behind him. Standing with her hands on her hips, she shook her head at him, making the gold loop earrings part the strands of her auburn hair.

“I told you last week I might leave for a while. After taking some time over the weekend to think about it, I have decided to do just that. Since you will be short handed, I figured you might want to hire someone else so I’m clearing out my office.” He set the frames down and leaned over his desk to press the call button on his phone. “Phyllis, would you contact maintenance and get boxes for me, please?”

“Right away, sir.”

“You can’t do this right now,” Angela insisted. “I counted on you accepting my partnership. Joe, you’re the brightest and best I know. I trust you.”

Joe slowly lowered himself into the expensive, Italian leather chair behind his desk. “I hate to disappoint you but if I am not able to do my best work then I’m no good to anyone, least of all you.”

“Ah, sweetie, let me be the judge of that, will you?” she asked softly as she sat on the corner of his desk. Joe could smell her perfume which at one time had been appealing; now, it seemed almost overpowering. Angela’s beauty was so striking that just being in the room with her compelled one to look at her. She was the total package—extremely rich, wildly successful, and exotically stunning.

On some level, Joe knew she still thought she loved him which was another good reason to leave. Their relationship had always been complicated but she had stuck by him through some terrible moments in his life these past few years. He owed her for that and she worked it, until he was finally drained of all feelings for her. There was nothing left to offer.

“I know what this is really about.” Angela looked at him through heavy mascara-lined eyes, analyzing him.

“Oh?” Joe couldn’t meet her gaze. He looked away, thinking of Turtle Creek, the special ornaments and the Douglas fir all gussied up with them. He had put on the string of lights, and that was no easy task with the way they had been stored, all jumbled together. He’d come up with a better system for the Collins family by next year.

“Joe…” Angela started to shake his arm. “Are you even listening to me?”

“Why do they celebrate Christmas in the country differently than here in the city?” He looked up at her with his first smile of the day.

“Huh?” she shook her head. “What are you talking about?”

“Here in the city everyone buys the most expensive ornaments without thinking about sentimentality, but in the country, each ornament is unique and has a story all its own. I like that.” Joe leaned back in his chair and turned to face the window. He stared out at the frozen water of Lake Michigan.

Angela walked in between Joe and his view. “Joe…hello?” She looked worried. “Come back to me, please.”

“And people in the country take the time to write letters instead of sending emails.”

“That’s because people in the country only have dial-up. Okay, I can see you need time off.” Now she was disgusted. “Take whatever you need. Your office and the offer will still be here when you get back.” She straightened her back.

“I appreciate it, Angela.”

“You better!” she snapped at him with a smile. “In the meantime, keep in touch and leave your forwarding information with Phyllis. Beware—I am going to check up on you.”

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Four

December 4

Joe couldn’t move his arms or legs. He lay in the midst of his bedraggled covers, breathing slowly. Soaked to the bone with perspiration, he was cold and wet, as if he had been pulled from an ice bath. He saw the hint of a gray dawn around him and wasn’t sure if he was awake or still asleep. The two worlds seem to mesh at times. He struggled to move from the bed but felt bound there by unseen hands. “Hudson? Is that you?” His eyes gazed wildly around the room.

Suddenly, the room became even colder as a white mist began to plug his nose and mouth. It stopped his breath. He began coughing and flailing against it.

“Where are you, Doctor? Where are you? I need you! I have to find you.” He could see someone running out of the room, down the hall, and through a door, but the voice remained a dark ghostly whisper in his head. “Where should I go? What should I do? I have to get out of here. Help me! Ah, stairs. I see stairs. I need air.” A man ran up the steps, out the door.

Joe was on the roof now. The air was cold, so cold it made him shake. All he wanted now was his bed. He went for the door. It had locked behind him. He’d freeze here. He shook uncontrollably. Slowly the edge of the building called to him. He tried to resist but it mocked. Had to refocus. Look away. There was steam coming from a pipe at his side. He’d keep warm there. He hurried to it; maybe he could survive until morning. Maybe.

Joe lunged forward and sat up in bed; he was fully awake feeling a terrible hopelessness. At last his legs worked. He dangled them over the side of the bed. Joe reached for the phone to call Dr. Boshar, whose number was on speed dial. It was on its second ring when Joe changed his mind and slammed the phone back down.

After regaining his equilibrium, Joe stood up and stiffly walked into the bathroom. There he rinsed out his mouth and blew his nose. Leaning against the counter, he took several deep breaths before turning on the sink faucets full blast and putting his head under. Standing up, the water ran down his neck and onto his chest. He turned off the water and stared in the mirror for a moment before pressing a towel into his face. You’re out of your mind, Joe. You shouldn’t be going anywhere. The only place you should go is with Hudson . Joe jerked back as if fighting off an invisible opponent.

He walked out of the bathroom slowly. Everything was still in its place. Just the way he had left it the night before. No one there. No sign of the nightmare. Joe tore off the bed sheets and padded down the hall to the washing machine. He stuffed the sheets inside, poured detergent on top without measuring, turned the gauge to hot, slammed down the lid and punched the on button. Immediately, water began flowing into the tub.

Joe went to the kitchen and read the list. The night before he jotted down a number of items he wanted to take with him. Working off this list, he packed his suitcase and boxes with surgical precision. Only to be interrupted by a high-pitched ring. Joe picked up the phone. He didn’t speak. It might be Hudson. When Hudson was around, Joe had to be invisible. Sometimes the specter played tricks on him, making him hear things that weren’t there.

Someone sounded breathless on the line. “Hello? Hello?”

“Yes?” Joe answered warily.

“Is this Joe McNamara?” He recognized the sound of Lucy’s voice, a voice that brought music back to his soul and flooded the room with color.

“It is!” he laughed, feeling normal once again. “And would this be Lucy Collins of The Turtle Creek Newspaper?”

“None other.” Her laughter was like wind sweeping through a house, chasing out the cobwebs and ghosts. “I called to check on my new ace reporter.”

“I am almost finished packing, Boss.”

“Then you are really coming?” her voice filled with relief.

“Yes, if the offer is still good. Lucy, is everything okay?” he asked in a concerned manner.

She sighed. “I was worried after Mike was so awful the other night. I wouldn’t blame you if you decided not to come, but I hoped and prayed you would.”

“Of course, I have my contract to honor.” He opened the fridge and took out a bottle of tomato juice.

“What contract? I don’t remember giving you a contract.”

“Your dad’s handshake.” He smiled, already feeling like he was building memories with this family.

“Oh, that’s right. Good old Dad. By the way, Mom and I spent all day yesterday cleaning out the apartment.”

“You really didn’t have to do that.”

“Oh, yes we did. You say that only because you have no idea how bad it was, but it’s all clean now with fresh sheets on your bed and…”

“Let me guess…there’s a blue towel on the rack in the bathroom.”

Lucy laughed again. It was filled with happiness and it made him smile knowing he had put that feeling inside of her. It was a nice change.

****

Daylight burned as he turned onto the Interstate. In a couple of hours, he’d be back in Turtle Creek. Odd how the answers he sought might end up being in a small town.

Why are you doing this ?

“The answer is simple, Hudson. I have a story, but as you know, it’s not a pretty one I can blurt out at Christmas. For years, I’ve planned on writing the ending for it. Now is my chance. My one chance.” Joe had an Achilles' heel inside his soul.

The black line on the Interstate was buffed with snow and seemed to go on forever. Then, as if out of nowhere, came the sign “Welcome to Wisconsin.” Joe put on his right turn signal and accelerated.

There was something he wanted. Something he had needed for a long time. For the first time in years, he felt hope as he drove back into the Collins’ driveway. He didn’t even have the SUV all the way in gear when he saw her. Lucy was running out the door toward him. Long legs wearing tight jeans were headed his way. With her curly blonde hair blowing in the cold winter’s air, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Joe grabbed a hold of the door handle and jumped out. She looked at him as though she didn’t have a care in the world. He’d give anything to feel that way again.

****

Right after her phone conversation with Joe, Lucy sent Mike out of town for the day. His assignment was to scout out towns in Walworth County and report back about the most festive Christmas decorations. Her motive was two-fold—collect information for a newspaper piece and get him out of the way while Joe settled in.

After she reviewed Mike’s information, she’d head back to photograph the street decorations and get sound bites from the residents about holiday shopping and traditions. She envisioned adorable holiday shorts for the newspaper in the coming weeks up to Christmas. People loved to read about their towns which made it an excellent way to pump up circulation. Joe didn’t know it now but he was going to do the interviewing as she took pictures.

Proactive, Lucy looked for ways to impress her Dad with smart business decisions. She felt this was one way to show him and make it obvious to him she could handle the company. She worked tirelessly, learning every aspect of the trade from handling customers at the front desk to laying out the spread, to the delivery of the newspaper. Her latest feat was hiring Joe as their new editor.

Mike took a more laid-back approach, which was fine with Lucy, although he was good in a pinch and never complained. Lucy suspected someday he’d go off on his own and work for someone else. The newspaper wasn’t his forte; it was just convenient. For Lucy, the newspaper was her life.

On numerous occasions, before he passed away, her grandfather told Lucy that once Harold retired he wanted her to be the next owner and manager. “It’s time for a smart female to take over and shake things up!” was the exact phrase he used.

Remembering those good times with him always made her reflective. “I’m doing my best to make you proud of me, Grandpa.” Lucy stood, looking out the window again, still watching for Joe.

In fact, all morning long, Lucy kept checking the driveway for his vehicle. She thought she heard the slamming of a car door a half dozen times, but each time she looked outside all she saw was an empty drive. Now Lucy was sure she heard the rumble of an engine. She opened the blinds in time to see Joe’s car roll to a stop. Joe came—even after her brother’s nonsense. He said he would, but now that he was physically here, she finally allowed herself to believe it. Seeing him, her heart welled with happiness. Lucy bolted through the door and leaped over the snowdrifts, quickly realizing she is only wearing her socks.

“Yeah! You’re here!” Lucy greeted him. Shivering badly, her feet were soaking wet and cold to the bone, so cold they actually hurt.

“Shouldn’t you be wearing a coat?” he asked. “And shoes?”

“What was I thinking?” She playfully knocked herself in the head. “When I saw your vehicle in the drive, I just ran out.” Lucy hopped on one foot and then the other. “Wait right here while I go back inside for my coat and boots. Then I can help you carry your stuff up and get settled in. The door is already unlocked. Mom is trying to find the key.”

“I think I better help you first.” And just like that, Joe swept her up in his arms.

Lucy couldn’t believe his grand gesture but the feeling of being in his arms was amazing. She felt perfectly weightless and wouldn’t have minded one bit if he carried her all the way around the waters of Turtle Creek. He carried her over the drifts, back toward the cabin, depositing her gently on the rug inside.

“You better change into dry socks.”

“Okay! I’ll be right back out!” Lucy called as she sprinted up the steps to her room hitting every squeaky board this time. “Oh, did I tell you the door to the apartment is open? You can walk right in.”

Joe stopped in the doorway and called up the stairs. “Yes, you did. Let me handle carrying up my stuff alone. All I have are a couple of boxes and one suitcase. As soon as I drop them off, I’ll be right back out. I’d like to get right to work.”

“You mean you don’t want to take a day to get settled in?”

“No. I can do that on my own time. Right now, I am anxious to get started.”

“Sounds good to me. Come on over when you’re ready.” Lucy leaned over the railing and smiled at him. After he left, she did an about face and headed back to her bedroom where she peeled off her socks. Her feet were numb with cold as she rubbed them with a towel. The bottoms of her jeans were even wet.

Lucy opened her closet door trying to figure out what to wear. This was the first time in years she had cared so much about her appearance. Joe brought it out in her.

Lucy changed into a navy-blue pair of slacks but kept on the sweater she was wearing. Yesterday, she had purchased the new top just for this occasion. Lucy grabbed her brush and ran it through her hair. When she was done, she still had a bit of a wild look since the curls went every which way. Lucy raked through her make-up drawer. No need to add any color since her face was already blushed with excitement of seeing Joe again, but she did find a tube of lip-gloss. Lucy was applying it when she heard Joe downstairs.

“What’s taking you so long to change a pair of socks?” he called up the steps.

Lucy dropped the lip-gloss back into the drawer and ran down to him.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Five

“Here we are!” Lucy spread her arms wide as they walked into the office.

“Well, look who’s here,” Ulilla put both hands on the desk and then hoisted up. She stretched her legs a bit and then toddled across the room to Lucy and Joe. “You must forgive me. I have arthritis in both my knees and it takes me a moment to get going after sitting so long.”

Joe greeted her with a half hug. “Hello, again. By the way, are you taking anything for your arthritis?”

“Aspirin.” Ulilla answered as though she hadn’t ever considered anything else.

“There’s a new method for easing the pain of arthritis called cold laser treatment. You should look into it.”

“I haven’t ever heard of that. What does it do?”

“Since it’s a cold laser, it freezes the tissues in and around the knee that are inflamed. The inflammation is what causes the pain. I’ll get you some information on it.”

Ulilla looked at Lucy quizzically.

“He was a file clerk at a hospital,” Lucy explained.

“Oh how convenient.” She smiled and chuckled a bit, “I may call on you for more medical advice then.”

“That’s not a good idea since I’m not a family physician,” Joe stated.

“But you’re handier so you’ll do.” Ulilla walked normally back to her desk. “See? All better now. It’s just the first couple of steps that are hard.” Then as she went to sit down her knee gave way and she fell back in her chair. She waved her hands in the air. “I’m fine! I’m fine!”

Carol gave Joe a greeting from across the room. Abe walked up and shook his hand as Harold came from his office. “Hello, hello Joe!” Harold grabbed both of Joe’s hands. “I can’t express how grateful we all are to have you here.”

“I am the grateful one. I only hope you still feel the same way in a few weeks.”

“Oh? Why wouldn’t I?” He scratched his belly.

“I hope my editorials meet your expectations.”

“I have no doubt. Joe, now that you’re here, I think Margaret and I will be able to take a break for a few weeks until the first of the year. Lucy, show Joe to his editor’s desk.” Harold went back into his office.

“Right away, Dad. Follow me, Joe.”

“Wow, I get the editor’s desk. Sounds important,” Joe smiled.

“Don’t get your hopes up,” Ulilla warned with a lift of her eyebrows. She looked back at the computer to the story she had been writing and let out a blood curling scream “Oh no!” Ulilla took hold of the computer monitor and began shaking it.

“You forgot to save before exiting again, didn’t you?” Lucy asked.

Ulilla grimaced. “I am so bad!”

“I’ll see what I can do about recovering the document,” Carol said stepping in to help.

Lucy led Joe toward the back corner of the room where someone had all ready hung mistletoe. Initially she didn’t like the location of it, but now that Joe would be working directly under the mistletoe, she found the placement to be fortuitous. “The only private office in the building belongs to Dad, and since he just said he is taking a bit of time off, I am going to use it. The large closet off the office has been made into my dark room for photography.”

“That will be convenient for you.”

“Very convenient, plus it means Mike can use my desk.” Lucy turned and pointed. “And there is your desk. Back here in this corner.”

“Yes, I see it. Right there by the bathrooms.” Joe said.

“I told you he’d notice!” Ulilla blurted.

“Yea, but that’s not the worst of it,” Monica said walking up to them. “The light is bad, too.”

Joe looked around. “Bad? It’s downright dark. I think I may need a flashlight.” He did his best to make light of it.

“Don’t worry; we’ve all ready thought of that. Mom is bringing a lamp from home,” Lucy added a bit too cheerfully.

Right on cue, Margaret arrived through the front door. She carried the ugliest lamp Joe had ever seen. Not only was it huge, but it was something out of the seventies with a wooden base and a brass faux scale.

“Let me help with that.” Joe rushed across the room and took it from her. “Now that’s what I call a lamp!” He held it out examining it. Then he set it on the upper left corner of his desk, plugged it in and turned on one of the brightest indoor lights he had ever experienced. “Wow, it’s everything one could ever ask for in a lamp.”

“You’re so sweet.” Margaret patted his chin. “I forgot until I was halfway here that the bulb is really a bug light. I’ll have to remember to bring a regular bulb next time I come to the office.”

Joe looked up inside the shade at the bug light. Then he counted out the steps between the bathroom door and his chair. There were three. “At least, I have my own computer,” Joe said as he sat down at the desk.

“Yes, that’s right. It’s yours until advertising needs it, which would be me. But that’s only once a week,” Carol smiled as she let Joe know how things worked around here. “Other than that, it’s all yours. But I am hopeful you will let me check email on it everyday.”

“You know, I think I’ll bring my laptop to work. It’ll simplify things for everyone.” Joe winked.

“I’ve seen those laptops advertised on TV,” Ulilla said excitedly. “They’re so small and thin, actually kind-of cute.”

“You really need to get out more,” Carol scoffed. “Even here in Turtle Creek, they’ve been selling them for years.”

“Electronics aren’t my thing,” Ulilla defended herself.

“I agree. You have a full page of notes written out just to turn on your computer and bring up Word to write your articles,” Carol sighed.

“Enough, ladies,” Margaret scolded.

“If advertising doesn’t need the computer for today, I can get started on my editorial.” Joe turned on the desktop and waited to connect to the internet…and waited. “You should really get cable.”

Lucy looked hurt and turned away.

“Hey.” He shot up from his chair and caught Lucy by the wrist. “That computer is going to be a while; how about you show me a good place to have lunch? My treat.”

“It might not be good for morale if we have lunch together,” Lucy demurred looking around at the others in the room.

“What about a working lunch then? It’s done all the time in Chicago,” Joe did his best to persuade her. “I offended you right away. Normally it takes a few days for that to happen. Please, I need to make it up to you.”

Lucy laughed. “I guess that it would be all right.”

****

They took the red vinyl booth in the back corner of the restaurant where the walls were covered with local historical pictures. The jukebox played quietly in the front.

“A place like this in Chicago would be considered retro,” Joe said approvingly. He started to beat out the rhythm of the music with his hands.

“And here in Turtle Creek, it’s our one restaurant. Ma’s Diner has been this way for the last fifty years.”

“Really? No updates?”

“My folks came here in high school, and according to them, nothing has changed but the waitresses.”

“I like that; it makes this establishment unique.” Joe looked over the menu. “Wow, look at these prices, would you?”

“Kinda high, huh? Don’t worry. I’ll pay for both our meals,” Lucy quickly offered.

“All the lunches are under six dollars—with dessert. I would call that anything but high.”

“In that case, the meal is on you,” Lucy quickly changed her mind.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way. Feel free to pick whatever you want!” He set the menu down with a smile.

Someone dropped coins into the jukebox and the music changed to Silent Night. A woman in her forties wearing thick-soled shoes and a pink uniform came up to the table, a pencil was pursed on her green order pad. “What will you two have?”

“I’ll have a salad with a side of blue cheese and water with lemon.” Lucy slid her menu between the ketchup and the paper napkin holder. As Lucy nervously touched her cross, Joe noted that she touched it as if reconnecting with a higher power. He found this interesting and made a mental note to ask her about it sometime.

“I’ll take the double cheeseburger with fries, Grace.”

“Have you eaten here before?”

Joe looked from the retreating waitress to Lucy, “No, why?”

Lucy sat twisting her napkin. “Well, you called her by name.” Lucy seemed a bit nervous or maybe still upset.

“Actually, I try to notice things about people because I’ve found that everyone seems to work better that way. So, I read her nametag.” Joe smiled trying to ease the tension around the table.

He noticed Lucy had really gotten quiet after those few words. Was she quiet because she felt uncomfortable with him? Or was she quiet because she was still mad at him about the Internet connection comment? Joe picked the latter. He had to do something to snap her out of it and get back on her good side. The quickest way Joe knew to do that was by being helpful so he took a pencil and a small spiral notepad from his shirt pocket, flipping it open in the process.

“Tell me, what is your vision for the newspaper?” It was always good to ask people for their opinions. It helped you know a bit about what made them tick and helped to ease a tense situation.

“It’s a double-edged sword. If the population doubled, we could hold our own financially, but our heads would still be barely above water.”

“What are you saying, Lucy? Is the newspaper in danger of going under?” Joe felt totally alarmed. This was a wrinkle he hadn’t counted on back in Chicago.

Lucy gave a moment of serious reflection. “There is a chance for it to happen. I guess I should have told you that right up front, but there is an equally good chance that we will flourish.”

“Two questions. First, why do you think the newspaper might go under?”

“Our circulation the last few years has stagnated and sales aren’t increasing while the cost of producing the paper keeps going up.” Lucy played with the saltshaker, tipping it over. She set it back up. “What is question number two?”

“What are your ideas about increasing circulation?”

“As much as I like the town the way it is, small and friendly, it cannot support us anymore. All the surrounding towns are resorts and they take in their high-dollar income during the summer months. It’s more than enough to last them all winter until the new season begins. Somehow Turtle Creek, although even more desirable, gets passed up. People look for homes on larger lakes where they can fish, ski and drive their boats. In this area, that means Lake Geneva, Lake Delavan and Lake Whitewater.”

“But that is fine with you as the town retains its charm?”

At Lucy’s nod, he continued, “I would suggest making your paper so unique that the residents in other towns couldn’t resist subscribing.”

“Great. That is my thought, too. We must be on the same wavelength.” She brightened. “My first plan of action is to do a piece on a variety of towns by looking into their special customs and holiday spirit in the weeks leading up to Christmas. Today, Mike is checking out Christmas decorations in the area. I’ll go back later this week to take photographs.”

“It’s a brilliant idea. Here’s another…have some kind of a drawing for dinner. What’s the fanciest restaurant in town?”

“We’re sitting in it.” She blinked with a smirk on her face.

“Oh. That’s right, you’ve already told me.” Joe looked around. “Talk this place up. The uniqueness; how it has retained its appeal. After that offer a gift certificate for a dinner here for a family of four. It can be a drawing, but it has to be signed up for via the mail-in coupon that can only be found inside The Turtle Creek Newspaper.”

“I knew my instinct to hire you was right!” Now Lucy seemed excited. Happy again.

“You hired me on instinct? I thought it was because of my editorial skills.” His smile was slow and easy.

“That, too.”

Joe picked up the pencil and began jotting down ideas. “Right now with a small circulation and just a couple of pages per issue, the space in your paper is valuable. Every word has to count. No fluff. No more obits about dead pets.”

“Oh. I see you’ve read our paper.” She bit her lower lip and then crossed her arms, one over the other.

“I’ve studied it for about two…” Joe caught himself. He had read the paper for two years but if he continued with his sentence it would make Lucy mistrustful of him and he couldn’t let that happen. “For not too long. But long enough to know what it’s about.”

Grace set their plates in front of them. Joe squirted ketchup followed by mustard on his burger and then squished the bun down. He tossed the onions to the side and took a big bite. Lucy gathered a few dark green leaves on her fork and brushed them over the top of her dressing. Another song played.

“I’m sorry about the location of your desk. I’ll try to come up with something better. Maybe you can use Dad’s office and I’ll share my desk space with Mike. Or Mike can sit at that desk in the corner. We’ll work something out.”

“My spot is just fine. I owe you an apology.”

“About what? You just got here.”

“You know…the crack about the Internet connection.”

“Forget it. We are behind the times here when it comes to technology. I don’t notice it until someone like you comes along to remind me.”

“I’ll try to be on my best behavior from now on.” He crossed his heart and held up two fingers like a Boy Scout.

“No, just be you.”

He caught the glint in her eyes. “What you lack in technology, you make up for with other things. More important things.”

“Like what?” Lucy laid her fork to the side and gave Joe her full attention.

“Valuing the important things in life and just finding a way to work around everything else.”

“And you don’t?”

“I value those things, too, but I sometimes forget. Thanks for the reminder.” Joe took another huge bite of hamburger.

“Tell me about your family.” Lucy picked up her fork.

He pointed at his mouth. Chewed. Swallowed. Drank water. “Nothing to say. I’m an only child. My parents died in a car crash when I was in college and I inherited their estate.”

“I am sorry to hear that, Joe. I can’t imagine being alone in this life. I love my parents and brother so much.”

Joe watched the expression change on her face. She became wistful and teared up. It made him want to comfort her even though there wasn’t anything really wrong. Lucy had a way of making Joe want to take care of her. He suspected Lucy could take care of herself. Somehow he had to convince her she needed him. It was the only way to get her to open up, find out what he needed to know.

“But it sounds like your parents might have left you a nice amount of money to help you get a good start on life, not that it could take the place of people you love. It’s just that you speak as though money is not an issue for you.”

“Money is always an issue. I have just enough still invested that the amount of my paycheck isn’t the issue. Not right now anyway.” Joe took another bite of his meal, this time smaller, and picked up his pen. After writing down a list, he said, “These are just a few ideas. We need to come up with more thoughts for tourist attractions, something that would be indicative of life here in Turtle Creek that no one else can claim, and then write articles about it. I read online about a town nearby that is known as The Circus Town.”

“That’s right. Circus Town is Delavan. Just down the road from us.” Lucy seemed pleased he had studied about the area.

“It has got to be a huge draw.”

“I did a photo layout for them a few years ago. I must admit capturing the credit of being Circus Town did do a lot for their summer tourism. Gordon Yadon, the town’s historian, can be credited for that.”

“Does Turtle Creek have a historian?”

“No, it doesn’t.” Lucy giggled over the thought.

“Let’s come up with something you can apply your photographic talent to that is right here under our noses, so close we haven’t been able to see it yet. By the way, I’d like to see your portfolio.”

“I don’t have an official portfolio. At least not one that is all bound together in the same book. What I do have are piles of pictures oozing out the sides of folders. A few of my photographs are hung in Dad’s office.”

“That gives me an excuse to use his office for a while. I’ll make a point of seeing them.” Joe stared at her so long Lucy looked away. “Sorry, I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I seem to be apologizing a lot today.”

“If it will make you feel any better, tomorrow will be my day for apologies,” Lucy chided.

“I’ll look forward to it.” He smiled over his glass of water before taking a drink. “Here’s another thought, newspapers can win awards for really good writing on titillating subjects.”

“Does that mean you will be sticking around for a while?” Lucy asked.

“Do you want me to?”

“I have time this afternoon to get a list of those awards.” Lucy sidestepped the question. “It’ll be helpful to read through them to find out what the judges look for.”

“Let’s get some of those awards with our name on them.”

“I agree. Maybe that will be enough to scare off the other newspaper that wants to come to town.”

“Another newspaper wants to come here? That doesn’t make sense.” Joe shook his head.

“I couldn’t agree with you more. I thank God for sending you to us. We may have a fighting chance now to stay alive.” Lucy started scooting to the end of her side of the booth to leave. “And that means you, kind sir, have a deadline that is due by five o’clock today.”

“Already? I love a challenge.” Joe was mesmerized by Lucy’s quick smile, her water blue eyes, and uninhibited enthusiasm. All he could do was shake his head and laugh. “No problem. I all ready have an idea.”

Grace dropped off their bill just as Bing Crosby sang I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas .

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Six

Joe sat down at the computer and began writing.

Joys of My Journey

by Joseph McNamara

I’m a trailblazer and a new resident of Turtle Creek—a city escapee.

Joe tapped out the first words of his first editorial.

“Looks like you’re off to a great start.” Lucy patted his shoulder and then left him to his work as she set to hers. On her computer screen, she looked up information about awards given to newspapers for articles and shorts. She compiled a list of them with the category and part of the States the papers were from. Then she pressed print and dozens of pages later she had quite a nice dossier of research.

Lucy and Monica spent the rest of the afternoon reading the pieces. Impressive. All of them. Soon after the first of the year they could get serious about this. Lucy looked out the office door at Joe. He was the only one who had the writing skills to win any award, and even then, it might be a real long shot. She watched Joe wondering how long he’d stay. Maybe she should draw up some kind of two-year contract for him to sign. Her dad wouldn’t go for the idea but she sure did. With him taking a break, she could do what she felt was best for the business and Joe was best for the business.

Lucy closed the office door and then called John Friedman, a high school chum who graduated a few years ahead of her. Nowadays he had a thriving law firm in Milwaukee but vacationed on Delavan Lake, only a couple of miles away. Whenever John was in town, he’d give Lucy a call. It was always a last minute arrangement and she’d meet him at some dreamy, romantic location for dinner. Every summer she could plan on taking a moonlight ride with him around the lake.

Although they were quite fond of one another, the relationship never developed. It seemed to remain in the ‘maybe someday’ stage. Emotionally, her old fiancé, Steve, always seemed to get in her way. Since John sensed this about her, he remained at a respectful arm’s length. Somehow Joe had leaped that gap and walked right into her heart.

Today she needed John’s help. She smiled thinking of him and tapped her pencil on the desk. When his secretary answered, Lucy asked, “Hi Karen, this is Lucy Collins.”

“Lucy, hello. How are you?”

“I am wonderful, thanks for asking. Is John in his office today? I need to speak to him.”

“As a matter of fact, he’s in court right now. May I have him return your call later?”

“That would be great.” Even though John already had the information, Lucy left the numbers for the paper and at home. “Please be sure to tell him this is really important.”

“Will do,” she promised.

Lucy hung up the phone. She looked around the office planning her cosmetic changes to the room when she became manager. Her father was near retirement age, although he insisted he would die at his desk before he would give up work.

Holding onto the past was different than valuing the past. She valued the past but wanted to update things. As a little girl, she played here at the newspaper when her grandfather ran the place. Outside of replacing the typewriters with computers, very little had changed since then. The world was changing and they needed to change right along with it. Perhaps they needed a visual. There was something she remembered that used to hang in the office and wondered if it had been tossed out or stored away. Lucy found the key for the back shed in the desk top drawer

She trudged through the snow to the large storage building and angled the key into the lock. Lucy pushed open the door and began to look around. There were dusty, old typewriters from the early 1900s. She depressed a few keys and the arms still sprang up and smacked against the roller. There were also old newspapers that had turned yellow with age. Some of them dated back to the 1920s. She wondered why these had been left out here exposed to the heat and brutal cold. They should be valued and kept in better conditions. Fortunately, the shed had remained dry and rodent free all these years. Now Lucy began to envision a newspaper museum. At lunch, Joe had encouraged her to think of something this town had that none of the others did. This certainly fit the description.

In the far corner, she found what she was originally looking for. Turned on its side was a large wooden map of the United States. Her grandpa had purchased it when he took over the paper from his dad. Outdated to say the least, it was an artifact she wanted on the wall of The Turtle Creek Newspaper.

Lucy hauled it back to the office where she cleaned it up. She sent Carol out for a laminated current map of the states. Together they hung both maps on the long wall, side by side. The older larger map showed far fewer towns than the newer map. A bell jingled over the door as Harold walked in unexpectedly.

“Hey, Dad, I thought you were taking time off?” Lucy narrowed her gaze at him.

“I am taking time off and this is how I choose to spend it. I came by to see how things are going here.”

“Let me get this straight. You are using your vacation time to come back to work?”

“Yep. I love your Mother, but she is bugging me to fix things around the house. I had to come here just to get away from her.”

“Now that you are here, I want you to see what I did.”

“Does it involve a fire extinguisher?” he laughed.

“Did I hear you mention a fire extinguisher?” Joe looked up from his work on the computer.

“You heard me right. Years ago when Lucy joined us fulltime at the paper, she decided the place needed some sprucing up. In her mind that included making it smell better, too.” Harold rolled his eyes. “She lit a potpourri candle and promptly left for lunch.”

“When I got back, there were two fire trucks parked in the drive,” Lucy recounted.

“The candle burned down one side of the office and our old break room to boot, but once we got our insurance money, we were able to rebuild the east side of the wall, get a new break room, and purchase all these computers.” Done with his clarification, Harold turned his attention to his dad’s old map. “Lucy, I thought we threw that smelly old thing away years ago.”

“No, I found it in the shed.” Lucy felt protective of it.

“Well, it’s still not too late; let’s throw it out right now.”

“No, Dad, it’s part of history. Our history here at the paper.” Lucy looked over the newer map. “How many little papers do you suppose there are across America these days?”

“Oh, I’m sure there are more little papers than large.” Harold rocked back on his heels.

“Wouldn’t it be cool to become pen pals with one of those papers from a remote area?” Lucy asked, bubbling with ideas. “Joe and I had a working lunch and brainstormed while we ate. My ideas haven’t stopped. They keep rolling in.”

“Joe is good for us in more ways than one.” Harold put his arm around his daughter’s shoulder.

“How so?” Lucy looked up at her dad.

“Not only is he good for the paper, but he’s good for you, too. He’s put color back into your cheeks,” he whispered as he pulled at her cheek.

Lucy touched her cross. “One step at a time. One day at a time. I cannot afford another regret.”

Harold breathed deeply. He sang out, “I still smell spring in the air.”

Lucy looked outside at the snow. “Not for a long time yet, Daddy. But I am looking forward to Christmas this year which is a nice change.”

“Me, too. Pumpkin, me, too.” Tears welled in his eyes. Suddenly he turned gruff as he always did when he was feeling sentimental. “Now where did you put my Santa hat?”

“Go look in your file cabinet. I think I saw it there under those awful, salty potato chips you hide from Mom.”

“Potato chips? How did those get there?” he scratched the top of his head. “While I am in there, I think I will lie down and take a nap on my old couch. Vacation can be tiring.” Harold went back to his office and closed the door.

Joe called across the room to Lucy. “I overheard your idea about having another paper as a pen pal. It’s genius! Publish their letter each week. Have residents write in to ask questions. It’ll be interactive. Hey, dare I ask if the newspaper has a website?”

“I know you’re going to really hate my answer, but no.”

“I’ll mark that down as something to do after the first of the year.” Joe wrote on a sticky note and slapped it onto the wall.

Lucy walked back to his desk. There on the wall beside his desk were many yellow and pink sticky notes. “Wow, look at you. There must be at least ten lists on your wall all ready.”

“I like lists. They keep me on track and in focus. I have several for every topic but I have them color coded and put them in a straight line down the wall.” Joe knocked on the wall a couple of times. “Each column is a new topic.”

The front door bell jingled as Mike walked in. He looked like he was in his usual good mood until he saw the person sitting under the yellowish radiance of his mother’s porch lamp. Just then Abe came out of the men’s restroom and accidentally whacked the back of Joe’s wooden chair with the door. It jolted his shoulders and neck. “Oh, sorry! Are you okay, man?”

“I’m fine, Abe.” Joe rubbed the back of his head. He slowly got up from his chair and looked around to see how his desk might be moved away from the ever-popular swinging door of the bathroom. Joe grabbed a hold of the edge of the desk. It didn’t want to budge, but eventually, Joe was able to force it along the tile floor. It made a harsh grating sound, fighting Joe every inch of the way toward the window. Once he got it in place, the cord couldn’t reach to the phone jack for his internet connection.

“Oh no,” Lucy lamented.

“It’s okay!” he assured Lucy. “I have my laptop with me back at the apartment. I will bring it tomorrow. I even have a very long cord. Long enough to scoot my desk over to that window and still reach the connection.”

Monica sat at the reception area filing her nails. “It’s refreshing to have someone who is inventive around.”

“Are you saying I am not inventive?” Mike asked half joking.

“You are but in different ways,” Monica let him know.

“Mike,” Lucy stepped toward him, anxious to change the subject. “What did you find out?”

“I have driven all the roads of Walworth County for the last eight hours. Here are a dozen towns that go all out for the holidays. Knock yourself out and pick the ones you want to write about.” Mike handed her the list, shot Joe a nasty look and then walked out just as Ulilla arrived.

“I’m so cold,” she complained as she limped to her desk. She sat down, huffing and puffing. After sneezing several times in a row, she pulled the last wad of Kleenex from the box and blew her nose. “I feel miserable. I spent my entire lunch time at the doctor’s office.”

“What did the doctor have to say?” Joe asked.

“Nothing because I never got in to see him. There were a whole lot of sick people who got there before me,” Ulilla said disgustedly and then promptly sneezed again. She pulled off her coat and then unwrapped the scarf from around her neck. “Is there a box of Kleenex somewhere that I can have?”

Joe found one on the supply shelf. He walked it over to Ulilla and set it down on her desk next to the computer. He touched her forehead with the back of his hand. “You shouldn’t be here. You have a fever.”

“I do feel really miserable.” Ulilla looked up at Joe with sad, puppy eyes.

“Let me call the doctor and make another appointment for you.” Lucy went for the phone.

“Meanwhile you need to go home and get some rest. Drink plenty of liquid and take some Tylenol. Be sure to gargle with saltwater, too.” Joe helped Ulilla get back into her coat. “Call us later and let us know how you are doing. I would be happy to run by with anything you need later.”

“Really?” Ulilla sniffled pitifully. “Like what would you run out to get for me?”

“Chicken noodle soup, vitamin C, orange juice. Just basic stuff.”

“Oh Joe you are the best. I have a feeling, if I follow your advice, I won’t need to get in to see the doctor at all.” Ulilla gathered her things together and walked out.

****

Lucy found it nice riding home with Joe. Along the way, they stopped at a neighborhood grocery store to pick up things for Ulilla and for his apartment.

“This is typical bachelor food, you know,” Lucy said eyeing the contents of his basket. Cans of tuna fish, frozen pizzas, TV dinners, and paper plates with plasticware were all neatly stacked.

“Well, that is exactly what I am. A bachelor.” He selected a loaf of bread and tossed snack items into his cart.

“That puzzles me about you. You are handsome and intelligent; I can’t figure out why you aren’t married.”

“I could say the same about you.”

Lucy’s visage changed. “Touché.”

“Did I say something wrong?” Joe worried.

“No, forget it.” Lucy refocused on the food in the cart. “That stuff isn’t nourishing. Why don’t you have dinner with us again tonight? I’m sure my mother assumes that you will anyway.”

“As much as I appreciate the invite, I am anxious to get settled. I’m heading to bed early because I like to start my day the same way.”

“I realized that when you took off without saying goodbye the other morning.”

“I was awake. No sense in waiting on sleepy heads,” he said with a laugh. Now Joe shopped for Ulilla and placed her items into a separate bag.

Once it all had been paid for, they took the purchases to the SUV, loading them in the back. Within a few minutes, they were parked in Ulilla’s drive and Joe was at the door handing off the items he bought. She could see from where she sat in the car that he refused payment. Lucy found that quite gallant of him.

When that errand was taken care of, they headed for home. It was five in the evening but was already dark out. It was exciting to Lucy that they lived at the same place, albeit yards away from each other. Joe drove around the circular drive and then parked behind the garage, out of sight from the cabin windows. He kept the motor running so it remained warm and cozy inside. It was a peaceful evening and Lucy had to admit she wasn’t in a hurry to end their time together. Joe seemed just as contented to sit here with her, too.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come in for dinner?” she asked.

“I’m sure. I need to get things taken care of.” He looked up at the apartment windows. “Maybe another time?”

“Sure. Sure.” She exhaled slowly. “This has been a great day.”

“One of the best.” Joe moved a curl that had fallen into Lucy’s face to the back of her ear.

She liked how his touch felt. And moved even closer toward him. Not two inches separated them from touching. Lucy moved her hand to the side of her leg, closer to Joe. If he moved even an inch, then he would touch her. The air felt alive with anticipation of what might happen next. Joe placed his right arm around the back of her seat. She leaned in to his side. The situation was coming to a crescendo. Lucy could almost hear cymbals clashing.

The way Joe lingered she knew he felt it. She moved her feet around for a minute and then sat still. The windows began to fog. Any minute now she expected her mother to show up in her red chenille robe, a gift from last Christmas, and knock on the windows.

Lucy moistened her lips and looked at Joe. He was watching her lips.

Her will power to walk away from him was crumbling, yet she knew she was crazy to sit here waiting for a kiss. Maybe it was more pathetic than crazy. Once she read an article about how office romance never works out. If she stayed longer, she’d be taking a terrible chance on ruining something good for the newspaper. Her first concern was the paper but Joe was becoming a close second. After all, she couldn’t sacrifice her love life forever could she?

Joe leaned toward Lucy. She felt his breath on her cheek. Then she made her decision. It wasn’t the one she wanted. “Maybe I-I should be going. We sure don’t want those frozen dinners to thaw,” Lucy’s voice was barely audible.

“Darn those frozen dinners.”

“See you tomorrow,” she said innocently.

When she opened the door to get out, she heard Joe groan.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Seven

Joe McNamara ran up the steps, leaving the bags on the kitchen table and rushed to the bedroom window where he caught a glimpse of Lucy’s small figure entering the cabin. Once the door closed, the only thing left of her was boot imprints in the snow, and the scent of her perfume lingering on his clothes. Violets? Lavender.

He thought about the way Lucy never stood still. Standing, sitting she was always in motion of one sort or another…taping her foot, wiggling in the chair, beating out a rhythm with her pencil, talking with her hands, or walking with elongated strides. But if he caught her in one of those rare quiet moments, he could focus on how large her eyes were, her flawless skin, and even how her nose was sloped in an endearing way.

Joe moved away from the window. He walked back and forth inside his apartment replaying what just happened between them. He was mad at himself for trying to kiss Lucy so soon after meeting her. After all they had only known one another for days. A nice girl like Lucy wouldn’t appreciate having someone make a move on her so quickly. If only there was a way he could rewind that moment he would, but there was no magic button to push. He just had to deal with it.

What was she doing right now? Maybe she was telling her mother about how he had tried to kiss her. Or that they had such a nice day at the office and at lunch, and then again at the grocery store. Then again, maybe she wasn’t talking at all. She might be alone in her room trying to figure him out as hard as he was trying to figure her. Yea, that was it. He smiled.

And he hit the replay button in his brain. He called this segment, The Impending Kiss. A kiss between them seemed natural and good. He wanted to kiss her. He thought she wanted it, too. Obviously, he was bad at reading her and didn’t want to make that mistake again. He’d have to wait until it was clear she wanted to be kissed.

Joe had just finished putting away the groceries when his cell rang. He looked at the caller ID. Angela. “Hey, you.”

“Finally! Joe, I have been trying to reach you all day.” She sounded relieved he had picked up.

“The reception is really bad out here so I’m surprised you even got me now. Must be that I am up on the second floor that did it. What’s up?”

“You’re cutting out on me. Hello?”

Joe looked around and saw another phone. Did it work? He checked and sure enough there was dial tone. “I’ll call you back on the landline.” Joe closed the call and redialed using the house line. Her line rang right away.

“Hello? Joe?” Angela quickly answered.

“Is this reception better? Can you hear me all right now?”

“Yes, I can hear you perfectly! Thank goodness. Your caller ID reads anonymous; what’s the number you’re calling from? I hate not being able to get a hold of you.”

Joe looked at the face of the phone trying to find the number. Then he picked it up and looked underneath. “I can’t find any number on this phone so let me give you the office phone number.” Joe reached into his pocket and took out his wallet. There was a card on the inside that he read the number from. “Is everything all right, Angela?”

“No, everything isn’t.” Her voice was glum.

“Tell me.”

“I had to fire a couple of secretaries and now I’m having to interview all by myself. You know I count on your feedback to let me know who I should hire.”

He sighed, knowing there was more going on. “What’s the real reason you called?”

“I can never fool you. Not for a moment. Okay, here is the real reason I called. I miss you beyond any words can possibly say. Joe, you belong back here with me. You know that.”

“Please don’t do this to me. There’s business I need to take care of.” He tried to hold his agitation deep inside where she couldn’t hear it.

“Just what business takes you to a place like Turtle Creek anyway?” She waited for him to explain. When he didn’t, she went on to ask, “Did you talk to Doctor Boshar about this new move of yours?”

“I did and his opinion was that it might be really good for me. We’ll see if he is right.”

“How long will it take you to complete this business?” Her impatience was palatable.

“I don’t know.” Joe hated when she did this. He hated himself for doing this to her.

“But you’re planning on coming back to Chicago, right?” Angela sounded even more desperate.

“Angela,” Joe sat down on the kitchen chair and hung his head, “I have no plans beyond the ones I have for today and tomorrow. You need to move along with your life. Stop waiting for me. I will only continue to disappoint you.” Joe shook his head, tired of this same conversation.

“I need you. I miss you. Joe.” There was a pause he couldn’t fill. “I love you so much.”

Angela was a complication in his life he didn’t want to deal with at this moment. “Don’t…”

“I can’t help it.” It was obvious by the sniffles she began to cry. “I know how to take care of you.”

“I can do that for myself.” Joe was now disturbed. Anxiety wasn’t good. “Listen, I have to go. Please, Angela, please move on with your life and don’t wait for me. Good-bye.” He set the phone back into the cradle.

Joe walked into the small living room. It was over crowded with vintage furniture, almost as though no one knew what to do with it so they carried it all up here and dumped it. Joe sat on the couch and looked up at the ceiling light, thinking about Angela. At one time, he really considered they might have a future together. But then his life blew up. That reminded him of the letters.

Joe opened his suitcase on top of a stick and ball table. He removed some clothes and there at the bottom was a large brown envelope. Inside was his life line of one hundred four pale-blue envelopes held together with one large rubber band. One hundred three had been opened. The last one was sealed. Unread. Waiting. Joe carried the bundle back to the bedroom and laid them out on his bed. They’d be his goodnight reading. Again. He couldn’t wait to get to them, but before enjoyment, there were tasks to complete.

Socks were placed into the top drawer on the right. On the left went his monogrammed handkerchiefs. Joe folded his underwear and boxers into exact squares and put them in the middle drawer. His jeans were folded lengthwise and put into the bottom drawer. Then he hung all his shirts on plastic hangers facing the same direction. His trousers were evenly looped over wooden hangers. He worked mechanically like a robot.

He took a long shower. When done, he wrapped a towel around his narrow waist. His upper torso was wide in comparison and muscular with a hair-covered chest. Joe leaned down on the windowsill hoping to catch one more sight of Lucy. By now it was way past dark. All the lights were on inside the cabin and he imagined the family to be singing Christmas carols as Harold danced around in his silly elf hat. Sappy. But the thought of seeing this, or better yet being there, made him wistful. He smiled. Chuckled even.

Joe dropped his towel on the floor and slid into bed. He propped up the pillow behind his head and leaned back. It was time to start with the first letter. Tomorrow he would read letter two and the next day letter three. After he read letter one hundred three, he would set aside the last letter. He had done this every night for the last two years. Maybe when he finished this time, he would have some answers as to what he should do next.

“It’s time for letter number 1, one more time.”

My Sweetie, I cannot believe you have been gone only two days. It feels like so much more time has gone by. I swear, I haven't slept since you left. I've tried. I just can't. I toss and turn. I get out of bed and pick-up the photo album. Flipping through the pages doesn't help me sleep, though. The pictures cause such a stir in me, but I hate closing the album. I hate the thought of putting it away. I was looking at the photo I took of you at your surprise going-away party. Everywhere I look I see visages of you! Waiting a year until I see you again just doesn't seem possible. I can't imagine waiting that long to feel your arms around me again. It's more than I can stand to bear. But I will. Next month, Mom is coming with me to pick out the perfect wedding dress. I'm also saving up for a linen chest so I can start collecting items for our marriage.

Joe stopped reading for a moment and held the words to his chest.

Gradually rest came like fulfilled promises to a bridegroom.

Soon a fish bowl of moving bodies filled his dreams. Neon lights flashed on and off as wild music played, but tonight he was able to wake himself. Dr. Boshar would be pleased. He’d call it progress.

Joe got dressed and hurried down the steps. He hopped into his car and didn’t even wait for it to warm up before he took off. He had no idea where he was heading. Just away. Away from his bed and away from sleep. There up ahead he saw Ma’s Diner. The lights were on inside. Joe found that strange. Usually small town diners closed up by nine in the evening. Here it was just about midnight and it was still open.

Joe walked through the front door, still trying to recover from the nightmare. He had to admit though that wasn’t the reason he left his warm bed in the middle of the night. The real problem was what brought him here to town in the first place. His conscience was bothering him.

He took a seat alone in the back booth. And watched the front door. A couple walked in and took a table at the front. The woman was a bit too loud. Her laugh was piercing, obnoxious. There was a small run in her stocking. Then a hand full of shift workers arrived and took a long table. They were really loud as they ordered breakfast. Now he knew why the diner stayed open so late. He took it all in as White Christmas played, a rather quiet overtone for an interesting group of patrons.

Grace wasn’t on duty tonight, but Susie was. Joe wasn’t hungry but he ordered hot chocolate, asking for a few modifications. It arrived just the way he liked it with inches of whipped cream spiraling upward and a shake of cinnamon on top of that. Joe sat making lists. Order was comforting.

****

Joe was at his desk by eight the following morning. He prided himself on being punctual and work oriented. Normally, it kept his emotions intact for part of the day, but lately his emotions were unraveling. That couldn’t happen. It wasn’t allowed. He needed to tighten his focus, become more businesslike. So he wore a white, button-down shirt, freshly ironed. Navy blue slacks creased. Shoes shined. His stiff exterior was protecting his crumpling interior.

His editorial deadline had been met and Joe needed something to do to occupy his mind, to keep his mind from running. He sharpened all his pencils, even if they didn’t need it. He laid them facing the same direction inside of his top desk drawer. Joe looked at the clock. Five minutes had passed. He gave himself permission to start writing the next editorial and was halfway done with it by the time Lucy walked in at nine.

Lucy was so pretty. So innocent. So unsuspecting. Joe stared at her. Compared to her he was scum. Nothing, not even his wardrobe that he wore as a coat of armor, could change him. After Lucy’s abrupt departure from his car last night, he resolved to take it slowly with her. Joe looked up and hoped he gave her an untroubled smile.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Eight

December 5

Lucy breezed into the office with the scent of winter wind on her clothes. Her camera bag was slung over her left shoulder. “Want to come with me?” She sweetly invited, swaying her hips side to side.

“Sure! Where are we going, Boss?” He couldn’t stop looking at her.

“There are five towns I want to visit. I’ll shoot photos of the townspeople and their decorations while you, as my man-on-the-street, will be interviewing people.”

“Sounds like fun. What’s the theme?”

“Christmas, of course, silly.” Lucy looked at the wall next to Joe’s desk. “I see your lists seem to be quickly procreating. What time did you get to work this morning?”

“Not long ago,” he answered not meeting her eyes.

“You were gone by seven at least. When I got up, I checked the drive and your SUV was missing.”

“By the way, I looked at your photographs in the office.”

She scrunched her nose and blushed. “I know it was silly to frame them but Dad likes to have my work hanging up.”

“The black and white photographs are particularly amazing with the way you used the light and dark contrast. They remind me of Cecil B. DeMille’s movies in the 1930s and 40s.”

Lucy knew that was over the top praise but didn’t say anything. It would have come across as false modesty.

“Lucy, they took my breath away. They are works of art. You should send them somewhere, like…to magazines.”

“Aw, how kind of you to say,” Lucy demurred. “But now you have gone too far. Magazines are filled with pictures much better than mine. I am an amateur and any professional in that field would spot me in a heartbeat.”

“You’re wrong. You have a fresh eye. In some ways, you are like me; we stop to notice the little things other people don’t. When I was younger this consumed me. I find I am still a bit on the obsessive side.”

“Now this sounds interesting.” Lucy laughed. She pulled a chair over to Joe’s desk and set her equipment on the floor. Lucy sat with one leg crossed over the other. “Tell me more.”

“One of your most fascinating pictures is of a forest. There is a saying ‘you can’t see the forest through the trees’, but you take it a step further. In one of the pictures, you singled out one leaf. One obscure leaf and then you focused your camera lens on it. Of all the trees in the entire forest, why did you decide on that particular one?”

“I don’t know,” Lucy answered quickly. “I looked up and there it was.”

“Oh no. There’s more to it than that. You selected that leaf, that single leaf.”

Lucy reflected for a moment and then answered, “I decided on that one leaf because it was lost in the array of thousands of leaves on hundreds of trees. I felt I was the only one who ever saw it and so I snapped its picture.”

Joe leaned back in his chair until it creaked. He rested his elbows on the armrest and pressed his fingertips together. “What else?”

“I don’t know what you mean?” She jiggled her leg.

“Close your eyes and think about that day. You are standing in the woods. What kind of day is it?”

Lucy closed her eyes. “I don’t know.”

“Was it rainy, cloudy…”

“Sunny! It was sunny that day and I will have you know I only took pictures and left only footprints.” Lucy peeked one eye open.

“No fair, you’re looking. Keep your eyes closed.” He smiled. “Tell me about the moment you selected that leaf?”

Lucy took a deep breath and shut her eyes again. “It was really quiet in the woods. I went alone because I like it that way. I stepped off the trail and made my own path between trees, over fallen logs. It was uneven terrain but I welcomed it. I kept walking, moving further and further away from houses. So quiet, I nearly heard the beat of my heart but then the sound of wind came gushing through like a storm drowning out everything else. Strange. The sun was so bright above the trees that at certain points it dried up the shadows completely. When I looked up, the sunlight was so sharp I had to cup my hand over my eyes.

“I went further into the woods, where the shade was deeper and it was much colder. I heard the caw of a crow. It was somewhere close and I had to find him. I wanted to see what he looked like so I got my camera ready and followed the trunk of an old oak up until it reached a branch that had three crooks in it. Just the very second I spotted the crow, it flew off. The wind kept right on coming making the leaves spin like colorful tops. It made a sound like it was talking in its own secret language. Some leaves were knocked away from the tree and floated to the ground as though the fight to stay where they were wasn’t worth the trouble.

“Then I saw the leaf, small and so pale that it was nearly wiped clear of any color at all. And yet it had that hint of yellow.” Lucy opened her eyes. “It held onto the tree fearlessly.”

“That’s what I thought,” he said with an approving nod. “And that story is what I saw in your picture.”

Tears filtered into Lucy’s eyes. Joe got her.

“Lucy, the paper should buy a domain and then through the web address, you would be able to do a photographic journal.”

Lucy grimaced as though someone had accidentally stepped on her foot. “Come on, let’s get our day started.”

****

A blanket of snow circled above and then blew sideways as they rode in Joe’s SUV down County O toward their first stop of the day, the town of Delavan. Lucy told him how to get there. The country seemed to confuse him. Lucy figured it was because they didn’t have tall buildings that blocked out the sky. He knew how to deal with traffic and skyscrapers. It was wide-open spaces that caused the problems.

“Is another blizzard on its way?” Joe turned on his wipers and tipped his head to get a good look at the sky.

“None in the forecast; this bit of snow is merely winter air,” Lucy said, her cheeks crimson from cold. Her mind was centered on Joe and the fun she knew they would have as they spent today together, all day. She looked at him from the corner of her eye. There was an aura about him that stirred her emotions. No other man had ever gotten to her like he did. Maybe it was because he wasn’t from around here. Every guy she had ever dated was from Turtle Creek. She hoped she was as interesting to him as he was to her. Thinking about Joe almost kissing her yesterday made her sigh.

“Is everything okay?” he looked her way.

“Very okay.” She punctuated her answer with a smile. Right then she resolved that even if it took all night she would sit in this vehicle until she got her kiss. No flaking out on him this time. Business protocol or not, she was ready for the business of romance.

Joe reached over, grabbed her left leg and gave it a squeeze. “You seem to have gone somewhere.”

She took hold of his hand and held on to it. “No, I am right here with you.” He made her heart race. Last night Lucy slept peacefully—dreaming of the almost kiss, soothed by the hope of a first kiss. Today, she closed her eyes and tried to imagine his arms around her and his lips on hers.

“Thanks for asking me along today.”

“I must make a small correction. I didn’t just ask you along; we both have work to do and I need you.” Her blush was immediate. She noticed Joe’s eyes. They were soft gray, almost pale, but right now they were darker, emitting a strong emotion.

Joe pulled to the side of the road and got out. Lucy wondered if they had a flat tire and was surprised when he opened her door and pulled her out onto the snow. With tenderness, Joe drew her to him. She didn’t have the sense to look away. She was locked in this moment and knew she’d carry it to her grave. His touch made her melt into him. His arms kept her from falling. Joe brought his lips within an inch of hers. He looked into her eyes as if asking if this was all right. Her breath caught in anticipation of what the next moment would bring. She wouldn’t turn away this time. The sun was high now, casting them in winter radiance. “Joe…”

His mouth prevented her from saying another syllable. This was their first kiss, happening right here at the side of the road just under the snowy boughs of tall pine trees. Joe kissed each hand, her neck and then her lips. He used his lips as one would use their fingers when plotting the way to go on a map. Then he gathered her even closer. She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him for all she was worth.

He stepped back and whistled. “We needed to get that out of the way. Now, its time for us to get to work.” Joe helped Lucy back into the vehicle, and within minutes, they were on their way. Once they reached Delavan, they turned onto the brick street of Walworth Avenue. Joe parked in the first available spot. “Should I apologize for kissing you back there on the road?”

“You better not!” Lucy threw her arms back around his neck and kissed him again. She couldn’t get enough of Joe’s fabulous lips. By the delightful feel of them, she guessed they had gotten a lot of practice over the years. “Okay! Now I think we’re really ready to start our day.” She breathed. “Here are your press credentials.” She handed it to him to wear around his collar, just like she wore hers. Lucy grabbed a hold of her camera case with one hand and opened the car door with the other.

As soon as her feet hit the street, there was no mistaking it. The town’s decorating committee had done an excellent job. Garlands were strung from lamppost to lamppost all the way down the street and more garland swaged across the street. At each of the two intersections, a giant bell was hung. Wreaths decorated every store’s entrance. Each was unique, indicative of the store’s wares. Bradley’s Department Store had a wreath made of miniature sweaters. Coachman’s Music Store had small instruments on theirs. The antique store had icicles made of antique silvered mercury glass with hand painted decoration. Elizabeth’s Family Restaurant had the day’s blue-plate special displayed. Boutelle’s Bakery had wedding cake toppers wired onto their wreath. For two blocks on either side of the street, door wreaths greeted customers. Lucy took pictures of them all.

Joe started his man-on-the-street interviews and Lucy caught pictures of him with the townspeople.

“Why is Christmas your favorite holiday?” Joe asked a high-school girl named Tina.

“Because of the great presents!” She squealed effectively diminishing Lucy’s hearing capacity for the day.

“But don’t you get presents on your birthday and other times of the year?” he pressed.

Tina’s brow wrinkled. She hadn’t considered this. “Yeah, I guess. It’s just more special now.”

“In what way is it more special?”

Now she seemed to understand. “It’s the time of year that my family seems to really get along.”

“Why is that?” Joe pushed.

“All year long we seem to go our own way. Mom and Dad have their work schedules. I play softball, then basketball and then track. But Christmas brings us back together. We go to church and that makes us think of others, like those we love. We’re a closer family for it, for a little while at least.”

“Good answer!” Joe gave her a high-five and wrote down her full name so he’d get it right for the article. “Now be sure to buy The Turtle Creek Newspaper between now and Christmas so you can read all about yourself.”

“Give me your best smile,” Lucy instructed.

Tina stood in front of the bank and posed one foot in front of the other. Lucy took a head shot which revealed a mouth filled with braces. “Excellent!”

Lucy took Joe’s arm. Today she felt bold, so she acted on those feelings. It paid off as Joe smiled broadly at her and kissed her cheek.

“Who’s next?” she asked.

“You tell me who strikes your fancy.”

Lucy looked up and down the street and then she made her decision. “How about that older couple walking right toward us? They look like they might be a good interview.”

Joe approached them by first showing his credentials. “If you have a moment, I would love to ask you a few questions for The Turtle Creek Newspaper.”

When the lady saw Lucy with her camera, she pulled off her knit cap and began to straighten her hair. “I guess it’s all right. My name is Blanche and this is my husband, Herbert.”

“Nice to meet you both,” Joe shook their hands. “How many Christmases have you spent with this man beside you, whom I assume is your husband?”

“Sure enough, Herbert is my husband.” She took Herbert’s hand. “We have been together not nearly long enough. Only five years.”

Lucy was surprised by her answer. “Five years, huh?” she butted in to Joe’s interview and then shot him an “I’m sorry” look. His smile told her he didn’t mind so she continued. “Love happened late in life?”

“Just the opposite. Love happened early in life while we were still in grammar school. It continued on through high school, but then the war came and Herbert left. I married someone else. He came home and married the daughter of a gas station owner which has since gone out of business.”

“Gas was cheap back then, ten cents a gallon,” Herbert had his first say.

“So how did you two finally get back together?” Joe asked.

“Death,” Herbert said.

“He means the death of our spouses. You have to forgive my husband’s abruptness,” Blanche explained. “Both our spouses ended up in the same nursing home. It’s terrible losing your loved one, but Herbert and I were there for one another. That’s where we reconnected. After they died, we married. It seemed natural, almost meant to be.”

“And we haven’t spent a day apart since,” Herbert squeezed his wife’s hand.

“So we are making up for the lost years and Christmas has become a miraculous time of the year for us. We know we have more days behind us than ahead so we make every moment count, every Christmas meaningful.” Herbert and Blanche looked at each other in a unique way, as if they could read one another’s thoughts. Lucy adjusted the settings on her camera and took their picture.

When the couple walked away, she caught Joe wiping a tear from his eye. He looked at her as if he needed to offer an explanation. “That wind is so sharp.”

But there was no wind today. “It sure is,” she agreed sharing this moment with him was special.

Joe’s next pick was a young couple coming down the street with three kids. “This one is all yours,” Lucy said and stepped back.

Again Joe introduced himself and flashed his credentials. The woman was anxious to answer Joe’s questions but the husband looked irritated. The middle-school boy tugged at his father’s arm as though he had somewhere he wanted to be instead of out on the street, answering questions. The two smaller girls danced around their parents.

“What is your Christmas wish?” Joe asked the woman.

“Peace on earth.” She grabbed the shoulder of one of the girls just before she ran into the street.

“Nice sentiment,” Joe agreed.

“Did you say ‘peace on earth’? I want peace in our family! These kids are driving us nuts!” the man complained.

Joe wasn’t deterred. “Oh, so the little blessings haven’t been tamed yet?”

“Not by any means,” the man scowled. “The holidays make it worse. They get all jazzed up on candy and thoughts of Santa bringing them presents. All I hear about for months leading up to Christmas is what I can buy them.”

“I envy you,” Joe said as he looked from child to child and then back to the man.

“Huh?”

“What a great time in their lives to teach them about giving,” Joe told them. “There are angel trees all over town. They remind us of the needs of others. More important, the recipients are reminded that they are not forgotten. This is a way your children can get involved by helping someone their age.”

“You know that is a great idea, hon,” the woman told her husband who immediately warmed to the idea.

Joe and Lucy followed the family into the bank. Just inside the door was a five-foot tall tree covered with paper angels. Each angel had the name of a child written on it along with his or her Christmas wish. Lucy and Joe stepped back to watch in silence as the Humphrey family started a family tradition.

Mrs. Humphrey patiently explained to her children about how not every child is as blessed as they are. It seemed to fall on deaf ears until she took one of the angels down from the tree. “On Christmas morning, this child by the name of Kylie would love to have a Barbie doll.”

“You mean Kylie only gets one gift?” the taller of the two girls asked.

“That’s right,” Mr. Humphrey said. “But there will be no gifts for any of these children if others don’t help.”

His words struck a chord with all three children. The boy began to read the information on the angels, trying to connect. In a few minutes, he had made his choice and pulled an angel off the tree. “This kid is my age. He wants a football. Can we get him one?”

“Of course,” his mother answered. “What about you girls?”

The girls both agreed to give something, too.

“Then let’s do that.” Mrs. Humphrey and the girls became absorbed in looking at the many names and wishes.

“Is it all right if I get a present for two kids, Dad?” the boy asked. “Buy me one less gift and use that money so someone else can have a Merry Christmas.”

One of the girls added, “I want to do that, too. I will give my allowance so this other girl by the name of Mary Lee can have a pair of pajamas.”

Lucy took photographs capturing the moment when the holidays changed from being all about them into being about helping others.

After the Humphrey family left, Joe said, “This is turning out to be my best Christmas.”

“Mine, too.”

Joe threaded his fingers through Lucy’s. “What now?”

“Now it’s time for food. I’m hungry.”

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Nine

Joe put his cell on the table. They ordered their hot chocolate specialty and sat sipping at it while waiting for their lunch, tuna on rye with coleslaw and pickle on the side.

“This hot chocolate is just okay. No one makes it quite the way you do.” Joe pushed his drink to the side.

Lucy wiggled in her seat with happiness. “That’s because they do not make it from scratch, like I do.”

“You have ruined me for any other chocolate but yours. It’s a gift that only you possess.” He reached across for her fingers and kissed them. He gave her hand a squeeze before releasing it. “Have I mentioned yet that this has been the best day?”

“Yes, you have.” He sure knew how to send chills down her frame. “It’s been my favorite day, too.”

“There’ll be more of them; I’m sure of it.”

“I had no idea you were such a good interviewer. You have an instinctive way of knowing the right questions to ask and then have a gift of getting people to open up. I can’t wait to see the heart warming Christmas stories you will be able to write.” Lucy gushed with cheerfulness. “I am fast becoming your number one fan.”

“I like the sound of that, but we aren’t done with our interviews yet, are we? I remember you mentioning there are five towns in all…we only hit one. If I remember my math skills correctly, that leaves four more.”

“What a mathematical whiz you are. Is there no end to your brilliance?” Lucy asked filled with laughter. “Of course, you’re right. We may only be able to get to one more today and try to finish up with the rest tomorrow.”

Joe looked around. “I take it the bathrooms are back there. I’ll be right back.” He got up and disappeared down a narrow hallway.

After a few moments, Joe’s cell rang. She didn’t even try to resist. She’d make her peace with God later. Lucy turned it around on the table until it faced her and she could read the name of the caller. Angela. Lucy glanced up to see that Joe on his way back down the hallway so she quickly returned it to where Joe had it. The moment his posterior hit the booth, he looked at the cell. Obviously, there was a message that had been left, but Joe didn’t listen to it. He shut it off and put it into his coat pocket.

Lucy sat quietly, having lost her spunk after reading the woman’s name. Angela . Who was Angela, anyway? Whoever she was, she had stolen a bit of her happiness just now. It wasn’t fair.

Joe’s foot accidentally touched her boot under the table. She moved her foot back and he touched it again. Lucy moved her foot one more time. When he knocked it for the third time, she realized it was done on purpose. It was definitely something one did when interested in another person. Not that she needed to know that. Not after the kiss by the side of the road. Or the kiss of her fingertips. He was good at redirecting her thoughts on him.

“Lucy Collins, I thought that was you.”

She looked up to see the pastor of her church. “Hello, Pastor, would you like to join us?”

“Only for a moment.” He sat down. “My wife is ready to leave but I wanted to come over and thank you personally for the Christmas card you sent us of our church.” He turned around and waved to his wife; Lucy smiled and waved, too.

“Pastor, I would like you to meet our newest employee, Joe McNamara. Joe, this is the pastor of our church, Dwight Owens.”

They reached across the table and shook hands. “What is your position at the paper?”

“I’m the new editor.”

“Your name and face aren’t familiar to me.” Pastor Owens narrowed his gaze.

“I’m new to town.”

“Welcome, Joe, and if you haven’t yet found a place to worship, I extend an invitation to join us some Sunday.”

“I would like that; thank you for the invitation.”

“Splendid. Maybe you can write an article about our Christmas Eve service. We have a lovely candlelight program that night.”

“Sounds lovely, sir. I’ll plan on it.”

The Pastor stood up. “Drop by the church sometime before then so we men can get to know one another better. We’ll discuss that article, too. Come alone and we’ll have a nice visit.”

“We men, huh?” Joe looked at Lucy oddly. “I’ll do that very soon.”

****

Lucy and Joe passed a Christmas store. “Let’s stop in,” Joe suggested. When he pushed open the door, the song Jingle Bells began to play.

The small shop was jammed with a dozen artificial Christmas trees and the smell of cinnamon filled the air. Each had a hundred or more ornaments hanging from the limbs. Buckets of the same were displayed around the shop.

“Hey, do you think your folks would like this one?” He held up a glass, hand painted ornament from Germany, a Mr. and Mrs. Santa Claus. “It reminds me of your dad wearing that crazy hat. I’d like to buy this for them unless you think they wouldn’t care for it.”

“No, it’s really wonderful. You’re right; it reminds me of Dad, too. My folks will love it, especially knowing it came from you,” Lucy said. It was in keeping with the other glass ornaments her folks had on their tree and it made Lucy feel good that Joe had taken the time to notice.

“Good, then I’ll get it for them.” Joe grinned.

“Do you realize what you just did here? You have given my parents another story to tell for many Christmases to come,” Lucy explained with a roll of her eyes. “This time it will be all about you.”

“Interesting.” Joe reflected on this idea. “And when they tell this story, what will they say?”

Lucy thought for a moment. “They will be telling the story about the first day you came to the newspaper and impressed us with your editorial skills. They may even mention our Christmas interviews,” Lucy said.

“I only hope I am there to hear them.” Joe murmured under his breath.

His answer threw her and she paused for a heartbeat. “What did you say?” She wanted to hear these words a second time. It was something she could think about when she fell asleep at night.

“Nothing.” Joe lifted his shoulders as he looked at other ornaments. They seemed to fascinate him. It was obvious he didn’t want to leave just yet. Every now and then, Joe stopped at a tree to look closely at the trimmings. When he found what he was looking for he pulled it off the tree. “I’d like to buy this one for you. It reminds me of the cross you always wear.”

Lucy looked at the delicate piece of glass in the shape of a cross. “It’s lovely, but you don’t have to…”

“I want to.” Joe cut her off and took his two choices to the counter.

They headed back outside, braving the wind as they walked to the SUV. Joe opened the door for Lucy and then went around to his side. The little things he did, like opening doors for her, made her feel special. She also enjoyed the smiles sent her way from the town folk when they saw them together. She was proud to be seen with Joe.

They waited for the vehicle’s heater to kick in.

“It’s late afternoon. Are you sure you want to hit one more town? The sun is going down right along with the temperature.”

Lucy hunched her shoulders trying to keep warm. “You’re right. But there is one more stop, I would like for us to make. There is something I want to show you.”

“Sure. Where to?”

Finally the air in the vehicle began to warm. Lucy relaxed her shoulders a little. “Turn left on County O and drive about two miles until you see a huge sign that says ‘Ma’s Diner’. On the other side of that sign is Sugar Plum Road. Take that all the way down to the end.”

Joe drove the car following Lucy’s directions. “What is this place we’re going to?”

“I’ll tell you when we get there. See? There’s the sign. Turn right here.”

Joe nearly glided right on past. To make the turn, he applied the brakes a little too hard causing the car to spin completely around one rotation.

“Whew. Give me more warning next time.” Joe patted his chest.

“Didn’t I tell you the road was behind the sign?” Lucy asked smugly.

“Yes, you did but I didn’t realize it was immediately behind the sign.”

They drove for a few miles, hemmed in on each side by tall pines weighed down with snow. A few branches had cracked and broken away from the trees and now lay in odd patterns along the narrow road. Snow flakes began to cover the windshield.

“You don’t think we’ll get trapped down here, do you?” Joe asked turning on the wipers.

“Trust me; there’s a turn around a bit further.”

Joe pulled to a stop when he came to a private drive at the end of the road. He looked quizzically at Lucy as though asking if he should continue. She smiled and pointed to keep driving. Joe shrugged and drove onto the private land.

A windbreak of oak and pine trees surrounded them on both sides; the only pathway through the trees was the tapered driveway they rode in on. As Joe pulled to a stop, he realized the area was so well sheltered that the wind here was nonexistent.

In front of them was a pink Victorian house trimmed with corbels and white columns. There was a turret built at the side and a porch surrounding it on three sides. A “For Sale” sign hung on the front post.

“That’s my house,” Lucy proudly announced.

“You bought this place?” Joe asked. “It’s quite a house.”

“I’ll race ya to the porch!” Lucy popped out the door and bolted up the steps of the porch. Joe came right behind her.

A bit breathlessly, Lucy said, “I come here once a week to check on the property. It’s been up for sale a whole year now. I have been saving my money for the down payment. Come the first of the year, I’ll have enough to make my offer.”

“So, it’s not your house quite yet.” Joe leaned against one of the porch posts. It moved a little causing Joe to stand back and look up at the brackets.

“That’s merely a matter of perspective. The first time I was here was for a Valentine party when I was in the third grade. The color reminded me of cotton candy so I have always called this the Cotton Candy House.”

“I am guessing the color stays then.” He chuckled.

“That’s right!” Lucy gave him a light pat. “This house, my house, has been waiting for me to live inside of it all this time. Often during the summer months, I come to sit on the porch. At night, the yard is filled with thousands of fireflies and becomes a magical place.”

“I’d like to see that.”

“The air becomes still and filled with the heavy scent of wood that it feels as though arms are reaching around you in a hug. It’s the perfect spot to come if you want to pray or just be alone.” Lucy had her eyes closed with remembering.

“I can see why you love it here.”

“And boy, do I have plans.” Lucy jumped down all the steps at once and into the frozen tundra of the yard. Snow crunched under her boots. She raised her voice, “This spring, I am planting either side of the walkway with tall beard-tongue, yellow sweet clover, spiderwort, wild geranium and red clover. I am going to have flower boxes under every window filled with rose moss and trailing ivy. And over here…this area gets lots of morning sun, so this is where my vegetable garden will be.” Lucy ran back up on the porch to ask, “How do you like my plans so far?” She batted her eyelashes and waited for an answer.

“I like everything about your place from the fireflies to the bean poles you’ll be planting.”

“Thanks. A few times in my life I have known something was mine by the very first look, and that is how I have always felt about this place.” She looked at Joe in such a way that this statement included him, too.

“I’ll tell you what,” Joe said. “The day you get the house keys, I’ll buy you rocking chairs for this porch.”

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Ten

It was after seven in the evening when they returned home. Joe felt tired to the bone, but it had been such a wonderful day with Lucy that he wanted it to last longer. For the second time, they sat together parked behind the garage apartment in his warm SUV. Motor running. Headlights off. This time he knew without a doubt she wanted a kiss, but was too nervous to make the first move. She was a good girl and good girls never made the first move. He didn’t mind making the first move, and in fact, it was kind-of a nice change.

Joe looked at Lucy. She was anxiously smiling. Yep, she wanted to be kissed again. Joe thought the soft couch upstairs in the apartment was preferable to the hard bucket seats. He wanted to touch her and hold her close. “Come on, let’s go on up to the apartment. I want to show you what I have done with the place since I moved in.”

Lucy timidly laughed. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. It’s nice enough right here.”

Okay, now he understood. As much as they both might desire the physical comforts of intimacy, it was something that went against Lucy’s core belief system. Although she never said it, he suspected she was holding out for marriage which Joe respected. In fact, he found it to be refreshing. Joe put his arm around her. “This is fine for me, too. I had a great day; you’re fun to be with.”

“So are you,” she happily sighed.

With a sudden movement, Joe lifted her over the stick shift and onto his lap. Joe brushed curly, tangled blond hair away from the side of her face. His gaze tracked the outline of her face and he studied her serene expression. Then he reached up under the back of her jacket and ran his fingers up the length of her spine. Lucy sighed but not as much as when he kissed her neck behind her ear. When she shivered, it turned Joe on more.

Joe opened his coat and wrapped it around Lucy so they both were in it. Then he held her to his chest, his lips on her forehead. Lucy curled in tight, her breath on his throat. This was the most intimate he had been in years and could have stayed like this all night. The option of staying like this was quickly removed when someone suddenly knocked on the driver’s side window. Since the windows were fogged, neither of them could see out. Joe handed Lucy a Kleenex that she used to clear the humidity away.

There stood Margaret wearing her chenille robe. Collar pulled up tightly around her ears. “Just checking. Is everything all right?”

“It’s my mother!” Mortified Lucy covered her face with her hands as humiliated heat poured off her. “I better go, Joe. I am so sorry.” Lucy opened the door and got out.

“Lucy, it’s you! Is everything all right with Joe?”

“Of course, Joe is fine. Why?”

“I didn’t expect to see you driving Joe’s vehicle. Where is he by the way?”

“Hello, Mrs. Collins.” Joe stepped out feeling like a teenager.

Even though it was dark, Margaret’s displeasure was still quite clear.

It didn’t seem like the appropriate time for gift giving. Joe quickly offered his apologies, as he imagined Lucy to be turning bright red. Everyone felt awkward so the goodnights were quickly said.

From the backseat, Joe grabbed the bag with the ornaments along with his notebook. He went upstairs to his new place and set everything on the kitchen table. Then he went directly to the bedroom window and watched Lucy and Margaret as they went inside the cabin.

It would serve him right if Margaret asked him to move out. What was he thinking, acting like a lovesick teen in the front seat of his car? Sheesh! He let his desires override thinking. It was best if he just focused on the reason that had brought him to town and walk away from emotional attachments.

He carefully lowered the shade to the sill and undressed. After his shower, he padded around on the cold floors, leaving wet footprints in his wake. The thermostat read sixty degrees so he cranked up the heat to sixty-eight. All the while, his mind was still flooded with thoughts of Lucy. Not all of them were pure ones. She was a fine Christian girl with loving parents and a pastor watching over her. God, too.

And who was Joe anyway? Joe was just an anomalous person with a lot of baggage including a dead man who haunted him. Dr. Boshar regarded Hudson as a symbol of guilt. Joe was pretty sure Lucy’s pastor would consider Hudson as a figment of a sick man’s imagination or a demon.

For the first time since he left Chicago, Joe wondered how long he would stay in Turtle Creek. Something had to give. He couldn’t go on like this much longer taking advantage of Lucy and her family. But he needed more time. More time with Lucy.

Joe also felt guilty about raising everyone’s hopes about saving the town’s newspaper. To them he was the hero. They didn’t suspect that he was about to crash and burn in plain sight, taking with him some of their trust. He went into the pantry and dug around for what he never wanted Lucy to see—the reason he insisted on carrying his own things up to the apartment the day he moved in. There it was. Joe found what he was looking for in the second box. He took the bottle of wine by the neck. Uncorking it, he had no reason to bother with a glass. He held it up to his mouth and wrapped his lips around it the same way he longed to kiss Lucy, deep and hard and hungry. The cool liquid filled his mouth and poured down the inside of his throat. At long last, he took a breather. The bottle was a half gone. Good. Maybe he would be able to sleep tonight.

The pills his psychiatrist gave him to sleep made him groggy for days and he hated feeling like that. Joe staggered to the medicine cabinet in the bathroom and took out the bottles of prescribed medicine. Pills for anxiety, depression, and sleep. One by one, Joe popped the caps on them and turned the bottles upside down. In a rush, the pills plopped down into the toilet. In his head he could hear Dr. Boshar yelling at him that he had just done something dangerous, but Joe flushed them away. The bottles he tossed in the trash.

Joe took the wine to his bed. He was restless tonight, more than usual. These were the times Hudson was strongest. Maybe the letters would help settle the situation. Joe set the bottle on the bedside table while he got up to go through his suitcase. He only found the empty brown mailer. He couldn’t remember what he did with the letters. Fright settled in as he worried someone might have found them. He needed to be careful and find a secretive hiding place for them.

Returning to the pantry, Joe went through the boxes for the second time. Plainly, they were not there. Joe scratched his head trying to figure out where they might be. As Joe stewed, panic set into every cell in his body. He knew he had brought them with him from Chicago because he read the first letter last night. Without explanation, he suddenly remembered he had left them in the side table within easy reach of his bed. Joe returned to the bedroom and sat at the edge of the bed. He pulled out the drawer. He sighed and smiled. There they were, bound safely together by the familiar rubber band.

He took out the letters and lay back in bed. After he pulled off the rubber band, Joe set the first letter aside. “Hello, letter number two.” He slipped the second letter from the envelope and began reading.

It’s late my love but I couldn’t go to sleep without writing to you. You are all I can think about. You are all I dream about. Come home to me.

Staring at the ceiling, Joe put his right hand behind his head. His thoughts were filled with this woman. He had Hudson to thank for this. Hudson had introduced him to her. And now Hudson was dead.

The wind threw sleet at the window. Moment by moment, Joe grew even more restless and more awake until he could no longer stand laying still. Time for a drive before Hudson came calling.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Eleven

December 8

It was early morning and someone was knocking. Joe leaped out of bed and pulled on a pair of worn jeans. He was zipping them up as he walked to the door. Joe peeked out the window and saw Harold.

“Hi, is everything all right?” Joe squinted at the man and then looked at the stove clock trying to see the time.

“It’s Sunday!” Harold announced. “I’ve come to take you to church.”

“Wow, as wonderful as that sounds, I am not able to make it this morning,” Joe answered, pressing his fingers against his scalp, trying to stop a hangover. “Let me get some things done around here this Sunday. Plus, I must admit, I’m not feeling up to par.” Joe realized his excuse was lame but the mere thought of listening to Pastor Owens while trying not to throw up gave him the willies.

Harold looked surprised. Joe imagined in his world church was the only place to be on Sunday. He realized church going was a necessary act for him to perform if he was going to stay in this town for any amount of time. Religion was the moral fabric of these people and he guessed it was also a condition for dating Lucy. “Tell you what. Come next Sunday, I will come to church with you. In fact, I’ll not only drive everyone right up to the front door but I’ll take the whole family out to eat afterward. How is that?”

“Okay, then I will count on it. I’ve got to admit, young man, you look as though you might be coming down with the flu. Take care of yourself and I’ll have Margaret make you some of her homemade chicken soup.” He waved goodbye and then held onto the railing as he went down the steps.

“Say hello to Pastor Owens for me,” Joe called just before Harold disappeared around the corner of the garage.

Joe pictured Pastor Owens in his mind’s eye. That man had an eagle eye and a suspicious gaze along with it. Even though the first time he met the pastor of The Town Church was at Elizabeth’s Family Restaurant, the man looked at Joe as though he knew him. Not like he knew him on a personal level; it was more as though he knew his kind and didn’t care for this riff-raff to be in his town, living within feet of the most influential family. Joe decided to figure out how to connect with this man. That meant he’d make the next move; a pre-emptive strike. It wouldn’t be done by going to church. Joe couldn’t avoid the house of worship either as if he were a criminal. Joe would pick the time, the day and the place. He was the man in charge. Not Pastor Owens.

****

A few days later Joe decided to talk to this man of God. If he handled things correctly, then the pastor might just busy himself with someone else’s sins and leave his alone. Joe needed to blend into the community. He wanted nothing more than to go unnoticed. If it meant putting up with a couple of hours of church to make that happen, the sacrifice would be worth his trouble.

It was late morning when Joe drove up in front of the church. As Joe forecasted, Pastor Owens stood at the door waiting for him. Being correct always made Joe confident. He checked his smile in the rearview mirror. Today he’d be just a good old’ schmuck who didn’t know much about God but sure wanted to get to know Him better in order to have a quality life. Praise Jesus. Joe knew the lingo and would use it if he had to, although he had to admit to himself that it pained him to be that insincere. Normally he was a truth teller, a lie slayer and a fact finder, but here under these circumstances, he was a player.

After a cordial greeting, they walked together through the building. Joe politely greeted the secretary who gave him a long look and then he followed the Pastor into his office. Shutting the door, Pastor Owens turned and gave Joe his warmest greeting. “I am glad to have this opportunity to speak with you.” The pastor took a seat in his large leather chair and motioned Joe toward the smaller one on the other side of his desk.

Joe found the seat to be too small and quite bumpy. It was a totally unexpected item he hadn’t expected to find where consideration should have been given to making the visitor at ease. Joe was irritated by it but he wouldn’t show it.

“I’ve been looking forward to getting to know you better since meeting you the other day with Lucy Collins.” He threaded his fingers through each other and placed them on the ink blotter in front of him.

“Thank you, Pastor Owens; I have been looking forward to this chat myself. I appreciate you making time for me on such short notice.” Good. Joe congratulated himself on showing enthusiasm.

“It’s my pleasure.” Pastor Owens leaned over his desk. “Lucy is a wonderful girl and they couldn’t be a finer family.”

“I couldn’t agree with you more, sir.” Joe ran his fingers along the armrest of his chair. Stop, he told himself, you are starting to seem nervous. Nervous people have something to hide. Joe placed both hands in his lap.

“I was wondering what your church upbringing has been.”

Careful with your response. If you answer with a lie, he will follow it up with another question that you will not be able to answer. Go for the truth.

“Sadly, I do not have a church background.” Joe then looked off through the window in a wistful manner. “Lately, I have been sensing that something is missing from my life. Being around the Collins family makes me realize that something could be God.” His eyes misted. It was shocking to find this was his true emotion. Scared now, it made him want to leave. He looked at the door but willed himself to stay.

“Maybe you can begin your journey with God…here.”

“That would be nice.” Joe flashed his disarming smile. “I hope a non-believer such as me will still be permitted to cover your Christmas Eve worship. I’ve been looking forward to it since you mentioned it in the diner.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way. I pray this is the start of a friendship between us.”

“That’s something I look forward to.”

“And I also hope this is the start of you becoming a member of our church. By the way, if the Lord does beckon your heart to come hither during the Christmas Eve service, please do not hold back. It would be inspirational for us all to see it happen.”

“I’ll certainly mull over that possibility.” Joe tried to hide the look of surprise on his face. Never had he considered that one’s salvation was for public consumption.

The minister opened his well-worn Bible and began reading scriptures in a theatrical tone of voice. Joe couldn’t help but think he would be good on the radio. Pastor Owens was the sort who got folks jazzed up enough to shout words like “Thank you, Jesus!” and “Praise God!” Joe also had to admit that if he were listening to the man while driving down the road, he would flip the station. Or if he were in a church filled with folks, he’d sneak out the side door. But in the office, there was no chance of that happening. Joe looked at this watch. He needed to be going. This was meant to be a quick visit not a drawn out and agonizing one. An hour slowly passed before Joe finally stood to his feet, held out his hand and thanked Pastor Owens for his time. Joe felt mentally exhausted by the time he reached his car.

Joe was in the whistling mood when he drove back to his apartment. Things had gone quite well. Just as planned, he had remained in control and was able to figure out the correct responses to his inquiries without lying and without giving anything away about himself. He had learned a lot from his time on the psych floor. It would serve him well here in Turtle Creek.

Now he began his ritual. He sat alone at the table and ate in silence. After the dishes were washed, dried and set back inside the cabinet, Joe walked to his bedroom. The room was dark as he sat at the edge of his bed and looked out the window toward the cabin. He hoped to see someone, preferably Lucy, hurry between the car and the house, but there was no sign of anyone. He didn’t detect any movement inside either but he imagined they were doing something quite colloquial, like singing around the piano or playing a board game together. Odd. He suddenly wanted to do that, too.

A lonely feeling enveloped him. Joe knew depression would be an issue before long. Normally, this was the moment when he reached for his meds, but since he emptied all the bottles down the commode, that was impossible. Joe looked at the phone, wondering if he should call Dr. Boshar for help. No, no. He decided to go it alone tonight.

No matter how may successes or degrees he had, something vitally important always seemed to elude him. Joe could never figure out what that was. It occurred to Joe that Turtle Creek was his destiny. This is where God had intended for him to come, where he would be set free from the past. He remained sitting on the bed and watched the sky turn from blue to caramel colored to pitch black.

After a shower, he read the next letter. This one was his favorite and the words swept him away.

Okay, in your last letter, you asked me to tell you all about my day. Pretty boring but here goes. I helped clear out the attic today. I thought nothing but junk was up there. Was I ever wrong. There was a treasure trove of forgotten memorabilia, but the item that stood out the most was a dusty box. Forgotten? I think so. Inside were old pens with advertisements on them. Mainly, they were from various gas stations or banks. But then at the bottom of the box I found part of a poem. Evidently, my grandfather wrote it when he first met my grandmother. The poem is corny and predictable but it’s the kind of love I always hoped to find. Here is what it said ‘was like the mid of springtime when the clouds were in the skye. I loved you when I seen you with the twinkle of my eye. I walked with you and talked with you on down the railroad track, wondering every moment if I would ever get to come back. We walked up on the front porch and sat in the old porch swing, my heart was filled so full of love I could almost shout and sing.’ It ended there. And so must this letter to you. Good night, my love. Sleep well. I pray we are together again soon.

Joe smiled, contented. He returned the letter to its envelope and put it at the back of the stack. The rubber band was placed around them and the bundle put back into the drawer.

What would he do now? If he were back in Chicago, he knew exactly what he would do. He’d grab a paperback and go sit in Starbucks for half the night. Here there was Ma’s Diner. He liked the place but wasn’t in the mood for it tonight.

There was a bookshelf in the apartment. Interested in finding a gritty novel to read, Joe looked through the shelves. Nothing caught his interest until he saw the Bible. According to the Christians he’d met, the Bible could be pretty gritty, too. Speaking to the pastor today made him curious to find out more about Christianity. Of course, he was familiar with the basic belief that Jesus was God’s son and he had left his Deity behind in heaven and came to earth as man to die for everyone’s sins. Given that knowing this didn’t mean it made sense, he decided to read all about it.

Joe tucked the Bible under his arm and went for the wine. The drink was fast becoming his mistress of the evening. He laid the Bible on the counter and just as he uncorked the bottle, an odd sensation took him over. He looked down at the book and decided not to drink tonight, although he still argued with himself a bit. Joe ended the conversation once and for all by pouring the last of the wine down the sink. He picked up the Bible, shut off the lights and went off to bed. Once in bed, Joe turned on the small lamp on the nightstand before opening the cover and starting to read Genesis. Before he got all the way through that first chapter, he had fallen asleep.

When he woke up, he felt startled. It was daylight, and for the first time since he was very young, he felt hope.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Twelve

December 10

Joe couldn’t go with her today. Supposedly there was another last minute emergency he needed to attend to which meant Lucy was left to finish the last of her man-on-the-street interviews without him. Lucy worried about Joe’s urgent situation but it was nothing in comparison to her disappointment over not spending today with him.

Since she couldn’t take photographs and interview at the same time, she asked Monica to come in Joe’s place. Today they traveled to the picturesque town of Whitewater, an un-glaciated area of southern Wisconsin. In fact, it boasted the state university where Lucy had completed three years of college before dropping out to help her parents at the paper.

While spending girl time with her best friend would be fun, Lucy hoped they’d also get useful material for the article. Very quickly, though, she realized this day was about to be a bust as Monica asked her lack-luster questions.

“What do you want Santa to bring you for Christmas?”

“A doll.”

“A pony.”

Then she interviewed a few college kids. “What do you want for Christmas?”

“A diamond ring.”

“The answers to Mr. Keenan’s final exam.”

None of it was really useable. It was expected, ordinary, nothing that would make folks ask, “Did you read that special Christmas article in the paper?”

Lucy wished she had a list of Joe’s intuitive questions instead of the message he left on the office phone. “Hey, Boss. Wow, you actually have an answering machine at the office. Impressive. Listen, sorry to do this to you today but there’s a situation I need to take care of. Thanks for understanding. Bye.”

Okay, so he used the word ‘situation’ and didn’t say ‘emergency’. It still made Lucy all the more aware she needed to get Joe locked into the paper for at least two years. First, as a businesswoman, she knew they needed an editorial genius at the helm. Second, the romantic side of her was starting to bloom again. She needed time to explore this relationship with Joe and two years would be a good start.

As soon as they returned to work, Lucy went straight into her dad’s office. What a relief not to see him there, sprawled out on the couch taking his daily nap, since he was supposed to be on vacation. She was handling things just fine if the high spirits and happy looks on everyone’s faces were anything to judge by. Even Carol was asking Lucy for her advice. Someday this would all be hers—that is if they could survive the other paper when it came to town. It was meant to be.

Lucy closed the door behind her and made her second call to the attorney.

“John Friedman, please. Lucy Collins calling.” This time she got right through to him.

“Lucy! Sorry I didn’t get right back to you. That is not like me, I swear, but I was finishing up with a court case. How are you?”

“I’m fine, John, thanks.” Lucy sat at her dad’s desk and after a few moments of catching up, she came to the heart of her call. “John, I would like to ask a favor.”

“Anything.”

“Great. I was wondering if you could draw up an iron-clad, two-year contract that doesn’t look so iron clad unless someone tries to break it.”

“This doesn’t sound like you. What’s up?”

“I just hired this really gifted editor and the paper is teetering at the make-it or break-it stage. Joe McNamara could just be the answer to our prayers.”

“Are you sure you want to do this then? If he is the answer to your prayers, shouldn’t you leave the timing up to God? This contract could backfire on you.”

“Backfire on me?” she repeated. “I am not sure what you mean.”

“What if you find out something questionable about this guy?”

“Like what?”

“Ah oh, that question means you haven’t run a criminal check on him. Please tell me I’m wrong.”

“No, you’re not wrong.” Lucy tugged at her curls. “But I know he’s all right. I just have this feeling.”

“You are probably right. This Joe McNamara is most likely a good guy as you say but Lucy you have got to be sure. Listen to me, if you’re that close to losing your family business you cannot afford to take this chance. These days I do not even hire a secretary without a thorough background check first.”

“Can you run one for me on Joe?” Lucy asked.

“Of course, I’ll be glad to do that for you. One other thing; let’s say he checks out fine with no red flags but then it turns out that its not he who wants to walk away, but you. For some reason, you are the one who wants to get rid of him. He will wave that contract under your nose.”

“I never thought of that.” Lucy sighed now more confused than ever.

“Let me think it over and see what phrasing I can come up with on the contract that will help you in either scenario. I’ll get back with you soon.”

“Thanks, John.” Her elbow ached from the old injury that always acted up in cold weather. She switched hands to hold the phone.

“No problem. I will be at my vacation home on Lake Delavan in another week and can bring the contract with me then. Is that soon enough?”

“That’s fine, and John, I really appreciate this.”

“Don’t worry about it and we can catch up on our lives over dinner. It’ll be fun.”

“Great. I look forward to seeing you again.”

John’s words of warning echoed in her ears. She touched her cross. What should I do, Lord? There are so many voices in this world. I have my faith in You. You are the living word. The living word in me.

The door opened and Monica walked in. “You have an odd look on your face.”

“I think I have disturbing news.”

“Oh, no, what?” Monica took a seat on the couch.

“I think I am developing feelings I don’t know if I’m ready for. I may even be falling in love.”

“With Joe?” Monica scrunched up her face.

“Yes, with Joe. He is handsome, talented, articulate, well-educated…”

“You don’t look happy about feeling this way.” Monica noticed. “Why is that?”

“Because I am scared. My feelings are happening too fast and I really don’t know much about him.”

“You should be apprehensive. Lucy, you’ve only known him for about a week.”

“Love knows no limits of time. It cannot be restrained.”

“What’s that from?” Monica narrowed her eyes.

“I just made it up. Never mind. And it’s been longer than a week…about ten days for your information.”

“Ten whole days, huh?” Monica mocked. “Well then, throw yourself an anniversary party!”

“Not funny.” Lucy scowled.

“Let me reflect back to your love history. There was Steve...”

“Let’s not discuss my former fiancée please,” Lucy cut her off sharply.

“Fair enough. That would take us back to your high school years. Now, let me reflect back on those years, who was it that you loved back then?” Monica thought for a minute and then sat forward. “I remember now. John Friedman! Handsome John, who was the captain of the football team. John, who went off to Northwestern University and didn’t come back here to practice. Yet you two still get together from time to time.” Monica leaned back in her chair. “You know, I always thought you two would eventually end up back together again.”

“Speaking of John, I just got off the phone with him.” Lucy looked back at the phone.

“Oh? Do we have ourselves a love triangle in the making?” Monica seemed interested.

“Not at all. He is drawing up a contract for Joe to sign.”

“That’s a new one. I don’t recall any employee ever being asked to sign a contract. Not even me.”

“We knew everyone when they applied, but nowadays with new people moving into the area, we can’t be too careful. This is to protect us and Joe, too.” Lucy did her best to explain away her real intentions.

“All right. I accept that explanation; it sounds reasonable. But tell me how your feelings are different than the other two times.”

“For one thing, I am older and have more experience with life, as well as with men. And with Joe…it’s a love that is meant to be.”

“A love that is meant to be, huh?” Monica repeated. Then she straightened her back and looked around Harold’s office. “Where are they?”

“Where is who?”

“Where are you hiding those trashy romance novels? Ah ha! I remember you used to put them behind the books on your dad’s shelf.” Monica pointed toward the bookcase.

“I haven’t read one in years. Please take me seriously, would you?”

“I don’t have a thing against Joe. Give yourself a year. If it’s really meant to be, as you say, then it will happen.”

****

If it’s meant to be…if it’s meant to be…Monica’s words kept rolling around inside her head as she lay in bed that night. It was the word ‘if’ that she hated. Lucy wanted him. Wanted Joe. He was so close. Mere yards away in his apartment. She closed her eyes and willed her brain to stop thinking about him. But there he was—charming smile, gray eyes, wonderful kisses. Darn, this had to stop.

Lucy remembered one Sunday in church Pastor Owens told the congregation that it was impossible to think about two things at once. Okay, what should she think about? Snow skiing. She used to go skiing all the time. Whatever made her stop going? Oh when she started working at the paper. Now she didn’t have the time or the money to put into it. Those first years at the paper were fun for her, no competition with area newspapers because there weren’t any. Now there were newspapers springing up in nearly every town and crowding them out. One was coming here on their territory. But they had a secret weapon now to help them. His name was Joe. Joe McNamara could wipe up any newspaper with his fine words. And her one track mind had just circled right back to Joe again.

Lucy wrangled with the bed covers and gave up. She would have Joe any way she could get him. For as long as she could have him. Lucy got dressed and put on her heavy coat before trudging across the yard. She looked up at his windows. All of them were dark which was natural since it was after midnight.

Lucy sighed, rubbing her arms as she continued to look up. She hadn’t seen Joe all day. Oh, how she missed him. The only way she could rest would be if she could see him now. Right now.

Lucy climbed up the steps and knocked softly at his door. When he opened it, she would leap into his arms like she had seen the girls in the movies do. Lucy waited and then knocked again. Still no answer. She knocked harder this time. Again, no answer. Now she pounded so hard she feared her sleeping dad would wake up and answer his door. She dropped her arms to her side.

It was obvious. Joe’s ‘situation’ had taken him out of town for longer than she expected. It was Saturday night, wasn’t it? A horrifying thought came to her mind. Angela . His emergency was Angela. The thought of them together was most upsetting.

Angrily, Lucy dug into her pocket for her car keys, and against her better judgment, drove off without her purse and license. Right now, she just needed to get away. She crept down snowy roads, not wanting to get hung up in a ditch somewhere. It was dark and eerie out.

She decided to drive to Delavan, the scene of their last fun day together. All the stores were dark but the Christmas lights still illuminated the streets. The hours they spent here were relived in a few minutes. It was too cold to linger for the full-length version. If only she could turn back time…

Lucy put on her left turn signal and drove back toward Turtle Creek. Coming through town, she was happy to see Ma’s Diner was still open. Lucy wasn’t ready to go home just yet and a warm place to sit for a bit was very appealing. The place was nearly empty but she still took a seat in the back booth.

“I’ll take a hot chocolate with whipped cream,” she told the waitress. “And can you add a splash of vanilla and a sprinkle of cinnamon.”

The waitress looked oddly at her. “There is a gentleman who has been in here several times in the past few weeks and he orders the same, odd hot chocolate concoction as you just did. Come to think of it, he comes in here about this time, too.”

“What’s his name?”

“Beats me.” She shrugged.

“Has he been in here tonight?” Lucy looked around hoping to see Joe.

Susie looked around, too. “No, I don’t see him.”

Elvis singing Blue Christmas began playing on the jukebox.

While she waited for her treat, Lucy began to think about her former fiancée. A wealth of tears came. She couldn’t hold them any longer. She put her head down on the table and silently wept. Thank goodness no one was around to see her in this condition.

Unexpectedly, someone touched her head. The most comforting words in the universe were spoken. “Mind if I join you?”

“Joe.” She looked up to see him.

He slid in beside her. “Hey, what’s this all about?” He smoothed her blonde hair back from her eyes.

The only person she wanted to see, needed to see, was seated right here with her. He might have been with Angela earlier, but he was with her right now. And now was all she had. “Joe. I didn’t expect to see you.”

“You look really upset.” His voice filled with concern.

“Oh, it’s nothing. I just couldn’t sleep.” She wiped her eyes, sniffling hard, not wanting to tell him what was wrong and yet wanting to tell him everything all at the same time. “Usually, I can lie down and within seconds, I am asleep. But not tonight.”

“And why do you suppose that is?” Joe chuckled.

“Just feeling a bit lonely, I guess,” Lucy answered, doing her best to shrug it off.

“Let’s talk about what is making you feel this way.”

“Are you the perfect man or what? You are always ready to listen and want to help. What makes you do that?”

Joe seemed taken back by her words. “You’re a sweetheart. Why wouldn’t I care about you?”

“Well, there’s something you should know about me, Joe.”

“Tell me anything you want.” Joe put an arm around her.

Lucy eased fully into his side.

“Take your time. Talk when you are ready.”

“Even though it’s been a few years, I still struggle over my broken engagement but I strongly suspect you may have all ready figured that one out.”

“Would you like to tell me about it?”

Lucy paused for a few minutes, trying to sum up her feelings into a brief snapshot. “Christmas is a hard time of year for me.”

“It’s that way for many people. Holidays can be rough. Any particular reason it’s been a dark month for you? Or is it just hard in general?”

“I became engaged at this time of the year.”

“That first evening together, at your parents, you told me you got depressed at this time of the year, so now I know why that is.”

“Not only are you a man who is a good listener but you also remember what I say. Who are you and where did you come from?” Lucy smiled and then continued, “Do you remember when you took the heart ornament from the box?”

“It was an uncomfortable moment.”

Lucy nodded. She choked back tears. “Steve gave it to me. For two Christmases, it hung on the tree but for the last few I have kept it in the box. It’s still too agonizing to look at it. I know I should be over it by now, but I’m not.”

“The heart symbolizes how you once felt about one another. Even though it has ended, it still represents that time in your life.”

“It’s an unhappy reminder.”

“Have you thought of embracing the happy memories you and Steve shared together?”

“I can’t embrace the memories.” Lucy spat. “Not ever. In fact I want to smash the ornament and toss all those memories away.” She hit the table with her fist.

“Then why don’t you? Go ahead and do just that since that is what you are feeling.”

“It wouldn’t be wrong?” She sat up straight in the booth and tilted her head to the side.

“What would be wrong about it?”

“It would be hurtful.”

“To whom would it be hurtful? The relationship is over and has been for quite a while. The only one left hurting is you. Let it go and if it means getting rid of that ornament to make it happen, then toss it.”

“I just might do that.” She calmed her breathing.

“Okay.” He ran his fingers through her short curls.

Joe stared at her and Lucy had this feeling he was analyzing her piece-by-piece, making conclusions.

“Anything else?” he asked.

“Yes, there is.” She sniffled. “Monica is a rotten interviewer. We can’t use anything we did together today.”

“I think we have enough with what we already have.” Joe laughed. “Anything more you want to say?”

“As a matter of fact, yes. As long as I am opening my mouth, I might as well open my heart and say it all. That is if you are you sure you want to hear this?”

Joe nodded.

“Thanks to you, I’m enjoying Christmas again and have this brand new hope.” She looked up at him and patted her cross.

“Hope keeps us from giving up.”

“You came to find me tonight?” she sniffled again. “How did you know I was here?”

“I didn’t. I had no idea you were here until I walked in. I came in just to sit a while.”

“Me, too. Joe, there’s something you still don’t know.”

“I’m still listening.”

“This probably seems soon but I am developing feelings for you. I don’t know what to do with them because I have no idea how you feel about me. You might suddenly decide to leave and then I would be alone again.” Lucy prattled. “I’m sure I am scaring you away by saying all these things to you but if I do not get them out, right now, I am going to burst.”

“You’re a hard woman to resist, Lucy Collins.” He kissed her cheek.

“I am?” Her face felt raw from tears.

Her smile grew and his lips parted. She stared into his face and felt lost in his eyes. Joe sure knew how to crank up the heat.

Susie returned with her drink and laid the ticket down next to the cup. It was then Lucy remembered she didn’t have any money. “Joe, I didn’t bring my purse.”

“I’ll take care of it.” A surprise laugh burst out of him.

“And do you want the usual?” Susie asked him.

“I think we’ll share this one.” Joe nodded to the hot chocolate.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Thirteen

December 12

“Did you pick up the new advertising contract for the tire shop in Twin Lakes yesterday?” Carol asked Joe when she got to the office.

“I did. You’ll find it on your desk. I must admit this is the most confusing road system I have ever driven on,” Joe complained as he set up his laptop. “I spent two hours yesterday trying to find Twin Lakes, and then, I even got lost coming back. Everything looks the same around here—the roads, the pastures, the cows, the snow, the sky, everything!”

“Confusing? I would think Chicago would be much more confusing with so many more streets and all those yucky traffic jams,” Ulilla scowled.

“I agree with you Ulilla,” Lucy said. “It’s just country around here with trees, forests, small towns, few streets…easy.”

“What about our traffic jams? There’s always a tie up at the one stop and go light at the corner of Main Street and County O,” Mike chided as he made out the payroll.

“You’re missing the point,” Joe puffed and used to his hands to explain. “You see, Chicago was built on a grid pattern with north and south, east and west streets. The only streets that go perpendicular are the expressways. Out here nothing makes sense. Not to me.”

“Are you done writing this week’s editorial?” Lucy asked.

“Done and handed in.” Joe sat down at his desk and stared at his computer as though he was wondering how to fill in his time.

“Good. Come with me.” She held her hand out to him. He grabbed his coat and then took her hand. They walked outside into the parking lot. “Today we are going for a field trip, literally a field trip. We are taking my car.” She opened the passenger door for Joe and then ran around to the driver’s side.

“Exactly where is this field trip taking place?” he asked with a mischievous smile as they peeled out of the parking lot.

“Oh, around and about. Out into the country.”

“You mean where we are isn’t considered country?” Joe looked around at the few buildings surrounded by countryside.

“No, we are in town but I am taking you out into the country.” They drove along roads that cut in between nothing but fields. “Which way is north?” she quizzed Joe.

He pointed. “And that is south, and then that is east and west.”

“Correct.” Lucy nodded in approval.

“But you missed my point. This all looks the same.”

“Then you need to look closer. Up ahead is a small hill on the east side of the road. See?” Lucy pointed wearing mittens. It felt right to share her home and her feelings with him. “It looks like a giant’s head. Just below that is a wide gulley. I call it the giant’s mouth. This land is owned by the same couple who owns the feed mill.”

“That explains it.” Joe arched an eyebrow. He couldn’t hide his smile from Lucy. She knew he was enjoying this.

“You’re not paying close enough attention. During snow storms, its best to use this road if you need to get to town. It is always clear.”

“And the reason for this is?”

“It’s the first to be plowed. The county does them first as a courtesy. Farmers need to feed their cattle. So the owners of the feed mill need to get to town and open the store for them.”

“Okay, that makes sense, but from where I sit, I see miles of fence lines. All barbed wire looks the same to me and so do the gates of iron pipe.”

“Look again, my ‘city slicker’ friend…look at the creeks and how they wiggle out of the woods and open wide into fields. See all the spacious open land? No houses as far as the eye can see but each field is unique if you look close enough.” Lucy went on to point at horse and cow pastures. Beat up road signs. “It’s a never ending space but it’s divided up into parcels of land and each has its own history…”

“…and its own story to tell.” Joe nodded with approval.

“Now you understand. People have lived here before us and will live here after us. Maybe a hundred years from now someone will be driving down these roads and talk about the days that The Turtle Creek Newspaper nearly went under but a remarkable city fella with creative ideas came to town and saved the day. He never left. His heart and his spirit still roam the pasturelands.”

“And did he find love while he was here?” His fingers followed along her jawline.

“I sure hope so,” Lucy whispered. Love gushed through her—pure and true.

“You keep talking about the newspaper going under.”

“It’s my biggest fear. Well, one of my greatest fears. There are others. But I will save those for another day.”

“Isn’t it a sin to be fearful?”

“My present fear is founded on fact. The other newspaper coming in has the resources behind them to wipe us, and other little newspapers like us, off the face of the earth.”

“You wear a cross which I notice you touch a lot. Shouldn’t you be worry free by now because of that, or maybe the cross doesn’t have the power you need.”

Lucy jammed on the brakes and looked at Joe full on. “The power of the cross is our overcoming authority and, you know, I had forgotten for a short while. Thanks for the reminder.” Lucy started up again.

****

Lucy lay in bed, staring out the window and up at the moon. Today had been a perfect day with Joe. Christmas had returned as her favorite holiday—thanks to him. Together, they were busy creating their own stories. If they were an ornament, what would it be? Just then she heard something at her window. She listened but now there was only silence.

No, there it is again . Lucy got out of bed and looked out. Joe was standing down below forming snowballs and then tossing them up at the house. She opened her window just as one hit the panes. Lucy ducked just as another snowball hit the side of the window shutters and then obliterated. Some of the pieces sprayed her in the face. “What are you doing?” She laughed.

“Come on down?” He beckoned at her with a strong wave.

She hesitated for a heartbeat. “Why?”

“I have a surprise for you.” His words were enticing.

“A surprise? That’s a good enough reason for me.” She started to close her window.

“But dress warm. Very, very warm.”

“Why?”

“You’ll see.”

Lucy shut the window and then slid into her long johns and slacks. She pulled her warmest sweater on over her head. She layered on the socks and yanked on her boots, before choosing her ski coat from the closet. Without making a sound, she got through the house and then shot out the door, leaping into Joe’s arms. He grabbed a hold of Lucy and whirled her around. He carried her to his SUV and set her gently down. “I looked up at the sky this evening and thought its perfect weather for a midnight drive.”

Lucy looked around at the snow that glistened in the bright moonlight. “I have to agree with you.” Lucy hopped in the car and slammed the door. She watched as Joe got in. He drove to the end of the driveway and put the vehicle in park. They sat there for several minutes without speaking.

“Is something wrong?” Lucy finally asked.

“I just want to be sure your mother isn’t prowling around when I do this.” Joe put his arms around Lucy and gave her a scorching kiss. “I have waited to do that all day,” he declared. Then he shifted the gears to drive and down the road they went.

A few minutes later Lucy came up with her own assumption. “We seem to be heading in the direction of my Cotton Candy House.”

“You are correct. We are heading in that direction. But are we going there?”

“Are we?”

Joe’s answer was a wickedly delicious smile as he wheeled down County O. This time he nearly slowed to a stop in order to make the turn onto Sugar Plum Road on the other side of the Ma’s Diner sign. They drove the familiar road that cut narrowly between the tall pines. At the end of the road, they turned into the driveway. Here the wind was nonexistent because of the windbreak of the pines and century old oaks. Lucy liked to think about the people who had come and gone from this very spot over the decades. Families lived here. Children were born here and played here. Women fell in love here and were carried away by their love in order to start their own families other places.

As they drove out from under the bevy of trees, a supernatural shine suddenly enveloped them.

“Oh my!” Lucy’s hands flew to her face. There on the Cotton Candy House hung white Christmas lights. They went all the way around the roofline. More lights were wound around each of the ten-foot posts. More strings outlined each window both on the upper and lower floors. More outlined the door. Lucy bolted out of the vehicle and up the snowy walk to the front porch. She turned around and around looking at the thousands of lights. Now she noticed they were not only on the house, but also nearly every forty foot tree had the same white lights. Thousands upon thousands of miniature lights were strung between every tree. It was magical like a fairyland.

“They’re not fireflies, but I think it looks pretty nice.”

“Joe, how did you do this without electricity?”

“There’s an old fashioned gadget called ‘a generator.’ I found several of them in the newspaper’s shed.” Joe ambled up the walk.

“You did all this...?”

Joe nodded as he came closer. “…for you.” Joe cupped her hands in his.

“For me,” she held her breath deep inside and slowly let it out. “This had to have taken hours and hours. And I had no clue.”

“Wait right here.”

Lucy watched as Joe ran to the side of the porch and pressed the button on a jam box. In a moment, music started playing. Dancin’ in The Moonlight . Joe bent low at the waist and held out his arm. “May I have this dance?”

“It’s my pleasure.” Lucy curtsied.

Joe’s smile spread across his face as he took her by the hand, leading her back down the porch steps.

She nestled her head in between his chin and shoulder, as Joe wrapped both arms around her and rocked her from side to side. Then he took her hand again, and spun her about and back into him again. She couldn’t help but squeal. Joe laughed, “Have I ever mentioned that you are a hard woman to resist, Lucy Collins?”

“I have heard that said about me. I assume you are one of my many beaus who told me that.” She smiled as he dipped her backward and then pulled her forward to kiss her again.

With a clear winter sky, and the light of the moon above them, Lucy knew this was the most perfect place in the entire world. Especially, when the man she was falling in love with held her firmly in his arms guiding her around and around as skaters on ice. It was as though only this place on earth existed and they were the only two people. Lucy couldn’t help but envision someday living here with Joe.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Fourteen

December 14

“Where’s Joe?” Monica asked. “It’s after ten and he is usually the first one in the office.”

“Lost again is what I am thinking.” Lucy twisted a pencil through her curls and left it.

“What do you mean by lost again?”

“He went to Lake Geneva. All the roads look the same to him so he tends to get lost.” Lucy shrugged.

The phone rang which Monica picked up from her desk. “Good morning, Turtle Creek News…Joseph McNamara? No, he isn’t here right now. I think he’s over in Lake Geneva and I’m not sure what time he will be back. Hold on for just a moment and I’ll let you speak to someone else who can help you.” Monica covered the mouthpiece. “Lucy, this woman asked for Joe. I think she wants to place an order with us for advertising space. Carol needed the day off to spend with her mother so she won’t be in until later today.”

“Transfer it to me in Dad’s office.” Lucy sat at the desk and picked up on the first ring. “Lucy Collins here. How may I help you?”

“Actually, you can’t. I am looking for Joe McNamara. I have tried his cell phone but there doesn’t seem to be a good connection.” The woman seemed distressed.

Lucy’s radar went up. This wasn’t a business call. This was more like a personal call. Who was this woman? And what connection did she have with Joe? Was she Joe’s girlfriend? “If you give me your name and number, I can have Joe call you when he gets in.” Lucy kept her voice at a professional clip.

“He has my personal number. I need to speak with him as soon as possible so please tell him Angela called,” she hammered the same tone right back at Lucy.

Lucy’s hand shook as she scrawled her name on a message slip. This was the same gal who had called him at Elizabeth’s Family Restaurant. “Okay, I will let him know Angela from Chicago called.” Lucy tacked that extra bit on trying to gain information.

“That’s right.” She sounded pleased. “Since you know where I am from, Joe must have mentioned me.”

“Yes. It’s nice that you’ve known each other for a long time.” Lucy wasn’t beyond pushing for more information.

“We’ve known one another for many years. We are…ah…very close. And who are you, Lucy?”

“I am a co-worker of his,” Lucy quickly responded.

“Nope, never mentioned you. Not once. Listen, I have to go. Please tell him I called, will you?” Angela nearly snapped.

“I already said I would.” Lucy fired right back, but Angela had all ready hung up the phone.

The conversation left a sick feeling in the pit of Lucy’s stomach. Things had been going so well and now there was this other problem. Love problems of the worst kind. Her heart began to ache.

Monica stood in the doorway. “You don’t look like you’re feeling well.”

Lucy looked up from the phone. “I think I may have just talked to Joe’s girlfriend.”

“Oh dear. And here you’re on the verge of celebrating your two-week anniversary. Whatever are you going to do?”

“I’m not sure. I can’t batter him with questions,” she huffed trying to figure it out.

“Why not ask him questions?” Monica walked into the office and took a seat in front of the desk.

“Because it’s not something mature, secure adults do. I have no claims on Joe. So far my relationship with Joe is undefined. A few kisses, lots of fun, but certainly no promises or declaration of love. At least…not on his part.”

“Uh-oh, what do you mean ‘at least not on his part’? Lucy, did you show your hand again, this time to Joe?” Monica leaned forward a bit in her chair. “You’re always the optimist and end up wearing your heart on your sleeve. Has Joe said anything to you about how he feels?”

“No, he hasn’t said anything, and now that I think about it, it seems to me he’s been quite ambiguous. Joe has just arrived here. He has a whole past filled with other people. I know nothing!” Lucy’s voice crescendoed.

“I could hear you both clear out there.” Ulilla hurried into the room and immediately insinuated herself into the conversation. “If we put our heads together, we might be able to figure this whole thing out. Maybe it was his mother who called.”

“No, his parents are dead.” Lucy remembered his mention of it.

“Sister, maybe?” Monica asked.

“He’s an only child.” Lucy shook her head.

“Well, at least he’s not married.”

“But do we know that for a fact?” Lucy suddenly became suspicious of Joe’s past. For the first time, she was glad John was doing a background check on Joe.

“Okay what do we do?” Ulilla asked looking from one to the other.

“ We do nothing. I, on the other hand, deliver the message from Angela,” Lucy said her name as though it made her sick. “I wrote it on this pink message slip. See? I am going to stick it in the middle of his computer screen and watch his expression when he reads it.” Lucy pulled five inches of tape off the dispenser hooked it to the top of the message slip and then walked to his computer with Ulilla and Monica following close behind. True to her plan, she taped it on the front of the monitor and then stood back to admire her work.

“Lucy, do you remember that summer we had the sleep-over in the apartment?” Monica asked.

“What has that got to do with anything?” Lucy complained. “Here my life is in the middle of a crisis and all you can think about are sleepovers.”

“Play along with me, will you?” Monica pressed.

“Okay.” Lucy shrugged. “You say we had a sleep-over in my parent’s apartment? The one above the garage? I don’t recall that at all, unless you mean the one we had when we were still in high school?”

“Yes, that is the one I am referring to.” Monica sighed deeply. “I left my pink blanket there.”

Lucy thought for a minute. “No you didn’t.”

Monica flashed her eyes. “You are not cooperating again. Okay…do you remember when we ate dinner in the garage apartment and I brought over homemade brownies?”

“It’s been years but, yes, I do remember that.” Lucy nodded.

“You never gave me back the pan.”

“She didn’t?” Ulilla gasped as her hand fluttered to her chest.

“No, she didn’t, Ulilla.” Monica shook her head furiously. “I am going right over there…this very minute and picking it up. I am sure I am going to have to look all over for it, too.”

Lucy brightened catching on to Monica’s plan. “You will have to look all over for it because it’s probably very hard to find by now.”

Monica grabbed her coat. “Don’t try and stop me.”

“You really shouldn’t do this.” Ulilla handed Monica her purse and escorted her to the front door. “As long as you are going, be sure to look and see if there are other things you left there.”

“Good idea, Ulilla. You always have the best advice,” Monica said going out the front door.

Lucy watched her best friend drive off. What they were doing was wrong but Lucy figured Joe may have done her wrong, too, by raising her hopes. She’d sort it all out with God later on.

With nothing else to do at the moment but worry, Lucy watched the street. Joe had to come here before returning to his apartment. It would be embarrassing for all three of them if he were to catch Monica shuffling through his drawers and closets. Knowing her best friend, she’d straight away confess. How pitiful it would make them all look.

Minutes passed. Now Lucy wished she had actually stopped Monica from going. Every wrong deed she ever did eventually was found out, like when she copied chemistry homework in high school. She got an F because she copied from someone who didn’t understand the periodic table any better than she did. That is justice is what her dad told her at the time her teacher called their house with the news.

Lucy soon sighed with relief as she caught a glimpse of Joe’s SUV coming into the parking lot. He walked into the office and removed his coat, shaking snow from it. His smile told her he was glad to see her. She squinted her eyes in thought, trying to remember if he smiled that way at everyone.

“The contract is signed, sealed, and delivered. I believe this is number four for us.” Joe set the contract on Carol’s desk. Then he looked at Lucy’s troubled face. “Hey, is something wrong, Boss?”

“No, I’m fine,” she tried shaking it off. How wrong could life be when she was in the same room as Joe? Then she remembered the root of her angst. Her name was Angela. “An-ge-la called.” The syllables rolled off her tongue.

“Angela?” Joe turned red and immediately became uptight. “What did she say?”

“She said she had been trying to get hold of you but hasn’t gotten through. She wants you to call her. It sounds important.”

Joe took out his cell and held it up. “I’m not getting a signal again.”

“You can use Dad’s office to speak in private.” Lucy was all business.

“By the way, how is your dad feeling these days?” Joe asked while heading for the office.

“He’s fine, why?”

“I just thought since he decided to take time off it might have something to do with his heart.”

“His heart? How did you know about that?” Lucy asked with surprise.

“Ah…I think someone here mentioned to me that he had a heart attack about a year ago. Glad he’s better and feeling well. I’ll go make that phone call now.” Joe began to close the door and then turned back around. “Will you still be here when I am done?”

“Of course,” she brightened.

“Good. Maybe we can do something later. Take in a movie or something?”

“I would love to!”

Lucy sat at a desk watching the clock. Watching the door. Watching the clock.

Thirty minutes later, Joe walked out looking upset. “Oh you’re still here. I thought you were leaving.” He seemed confused.

“No, Joe, I said I would still be here.” Lucy looked up in surprise.

“I have an appointment at the church with Pastor Owens about the Christmas service. I may not be in again until tomorrow.”

“I can come with you.” Lucy stepped toward him.

“No, someone needs to be at the newspaper.”

“That can be me,” Ulilla offered. “I will stay right here. You go ahead with Joe, Lucy.”

“No.” Joe was emphatic. “I need to see Pastor Owens alone.”

Lucy and Ulilla watched as Joe got in his car and drove away. “He keeps me so off balance.”

“Welcome to the wonderful world of relationships.”

Lucy was going over the new ads for the paper when Pastor Owens walked into the paper a few minutes later. “You just missed Joe by five minutes,” Lucy told him looking up at the clock.

“Oh? I didn’t know Joe wanted to see me.”

“Didn’t Joe have an appointment with you today?” Ulilla asked.

“No, not today, although he did stop by a few days ago. We had a nice visit, too. Charming young man. Charming.” The pastor reached into his pocket and pulled out the service bulletin. “Lucy, we are changing up the time for the Christmas Eve service and I wanted to be sure these were put in the paper.”

“Sure, I can do that for you.” Lucy put on a happy face and pretended nothing was troubling her. Acting was something she was really good at. Her college theater class sure came in handy right about now. And here her folks regarded it as a wasted credit. Electives were important. This just proved it.

Pastor Owens reached into his pocket for his wallet.

“No.” Lucy stopped him. “This is another form of tithing.”

“Thank you.”

He went out as Monica walked in.

“Here’s the scoop on your mystery man.”

Lucy held up her hand. “Shhh, wait a sec.” Lucy watched Pastor Owens get into his car and drive away. “Okay, he’s gone now. What did you find out?”

Monica plunked her purse down and collapsed into the chair. She drew deep breaths and sounded as if she had run the five miles to the garage apartment and then back again. “I got there, rummaged around, and made it back here within an hour. No one saw me either, not even your parents. I am really good at this. Okay, Lucy, are you ready for the scoop?”

“Just tell me straight out, Monica.” Lucy leaned forward in her office chair.

“I found empty bottles of wine in different locations of the apartment.” Monica arched her eyebrows.

“You’re kidding me, right?” Lucy couldn’t believe what Monica was saying.

Then Monica opened her purse and took out a small pad of paper. “I took notes for you as I went along and I’ll refer to them as I fill you in. It’s important to be accurate where matters of the heart are concerned. One wine bottle was in the bathroom. It was three quarters empty. There were two more on his nightstand. Both of them were empty. I even found one under his bed. That was empty as well. Oh wait, there was another empty bottle in the kitchen trash.”

This was information Lucy hadn’t considered and it was taking her by total surprise. Was Joe a closet drinker? She worried. “How many bottles in all?”

“Five.” Monica sat back in her chair and crossed one leg over the other.

“What else did you find?” Wine bottles were disconcerting and she held her breath waiting for more bad news.

“Are you really sure you want to hear this?” Monica wanted to know. “Remember, once I tell you the news the information will always be out there.”

Ulilla scooted into the room. “You can’t stop now.”

“I found a letter on the floor next to the bed, obviously handwritten.”

“What did it say?”

“I couldn’t make out the words. It looked as though water had gotten on it and made the ink run. It was a mess.”

“What kind of a letter was it?”

“I think it was a love letter,” Monica dramatically stated.

“If you couldn’t read the words, how do you know?”

“I did make out a couple of words, like honey and love you. But even then I am guessing.”

“Was it from Angela?’ Lucy held her breath.

“I couldn’t find a signature.”

“Or was it written from Joe to Angela?” Ulilla asked.

“Oh, I hadn’t considered that. Let me think a minute.” Monica pressed her finger to the side of her face. “I am pretty sure it was written to Joe. The stationary looked feminine, the type a man wouldn’t use. The penmanship looked kind of curlicue, that is what I could see of it. Joe must really like her a lot because the letter was badly creased; he must have read it dozens of times. I even looked through his drawers but couldn’t find the first page or the envelope anywhere. “What are you going to do?” Ulilla asked Lucy.

“Nothing…for now. I will tell you this, though, if he marries Angela and brings that woman here to live, I am leaving Turtle Creek forever.”

“Lucy!” Ulilla gasped. “You can’t let someone drive you away from your home. You belong here. Things just wouldn’t be the same.”

“I couldn’t stand seeing him with another woman.” Lucy defended herself.

“If anyone leaves, it will be him.” Ulilla puffed. “But for now you are putting too much importance on that one letter. You have no idea how old it is, who it came from, or who wrote it. Let’s not get carried away with wild imaginations. In the meantime, we’ll just go about our business and keep an eye on him. Want me to go through his desk for you?”

Lucy thought about the tender moments she and Joe had shared including the night with Joe at the Cotton Candy House and all the work he had gone through for her. These were not the actions of a man in love with someone else. Lucy wasn’t about to give up and act irrationally. Maybe Joe’s past also included a broken engagement.

She touched her cross. “No, not now,” Lucy said. “Although we have just learned some bewildering things about Joe, we shouldn’t make it worse by jumping to conclusions. Let’s put our faith in the fact God brought Joe to us for a purpose. Let’s wait on Him.”

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Fifteen

December 16

Joe had gone to church on Sunday with the Collins family just as he had promised he would do. It was a nice, informative service and it placated the Collins’ family. Even Pastor Owens stopped looking at him in his usual cock-eyed manner. Mission accomplished.

But today was Monday and here Joe sat again in church. This time he was alone. The sanctuary felt right. Comforting. Peaceful. No wonder people liked coming here. The solitude alone was worth the trip. Although this was the first house of worship he was ever inside, excluding weddings and funerals, he liked the feel of it and wondered what took him so long to try it. Back at the hospital, there was a chapel close to the psych ward but he never gave it a thought, never went in to pray. He always walked right past.

This church building in Turtle Creek was old and had character. Generations of prayers had been sent from this very spot, which was comforting to think about. Joe knew he was on holy ground. Someone had gone to great care to decorate the sanctuary. Wreaths hung on each window and the altar was filled with pots of red and white poinsettias.

There was a solid wood door just off the altar area. When it opened, the sound echoed throughout the high arched ceiling. An elderly man walked out and he turned on the light. It cast his face in shadows while it sent a luminous halo about his head. The man walked around the altar area, carefully watching his steps so as not to knock over one of the plants. He spent time straightening the choir’s hymnals. As he turned, a look of surprise crossed his face when he saw Joe sitting placidly on the third pew from the front. “Excuse me. I didn’t realize anyone was here.” He gave his chest a pat. “You gave my old heart quite a start.”

“I am sorry,” Joe apologized. “I came here for some quiet reflective time and hoped to speak with Pastor Owens.”

“Sorry but it’s his day off. Maybe there is something I can help you with?” His voice was cajoling, safe.

“I’m not really sure…”Joe doubted, shaking his head.

“We can keep this conversation off the record.” The man took a step forward.

“It’s just that I don’t know how to begin a conversation like this,” Joe admitted. “Actually, I really didn’t come here to see Pastor Owens, or anyone else. I just used it as an excuse to be here. I came to pray and try to find something.”

“You mean you came to find God.” The elderly man walked down from the raised stage and took an aisle seat across from Joe.

“Huh?” Joe glanced at the gentleman from toe to head. His boldness took Joe by surprise.

“You said you came here to find something. We aren’t a store so I assume it’s God you’re looking for.”

“Maybe.” Joe nodded and then sat reflectively for a moment. “I am not whole-heartedly given over to a God belief system, but I am intrigued by what faith does to people.”

“Yes, faith is an important ingredient.”

Joe puffed out a breath. His mind filled with so many thoughts and feelings. It was hard to know where to begin. “You see, I need something, but I am not so sure God or faith can help me. I am filled with guilt and remorse. And other than a whole lot of medication, I don’t know how to relieve myself of this awful searing pain.”

“Can you identify the root of this pain?”

“Some of it. I am not who others think I am. I hate that I have deceived so many people I truly care about. They do not deserve this.”

“Then why not tell them the truth?” the man asked.

“Ah, you give me a simple answer. If I do that, it may cause them even greater pain.”

The elderly man put his hands together. “Believe it or not, I do understand your dilemma. In my line of work, I have found if there is pain it must come from truth and not deceit.”

Joe considered this and nodded in agreement. “But I still can’t bring myself to knowingly inflict pain, even if it is the truth. Everything would be better if I were actually the person they thought I was.”

“And who is that?”

“Someone who is worthy of love and trust.” Joe gave a small pathetic chuckle. “They think I can save their family business. But I can’t do that. No one can. The only thing I am giving them is false hope.”

“Without hope we perish.” The man raised his bushy eyebrows.

“Perishing is inevitable.” Joe couldn’t look him in his face. Instead he looked up at the cross. “Initially, I had planned on passing right through Turtle Creek. But then my plans changed. I seem to have become part of a network of people who care about me, and now, I am tangled in a web.”

“It sounds as though you are where you belong. Who are you really? I don’t mean your name, but on the inside. Who are you inside where no one can see but God?”

“I am lost…very lost. I lay in the dark, waiting for sleep that doesn’t come.”

“And why is that?”

“I am burdened by life.”

“God can remove that burden. His son, Jesus, paid the price. He is the hope of our faith. Try telling Him what you said to me today.”

“But He already heard us, right?” Joe asked.

“Yes, but I know He would like to hear it directly from you. Open your heart to Him. What is holding you back from the truth?”

“For the first time in my life, I am surrounded by love and I don’t want to disappoint anyone.” Joe’s eyes stung with tears.

“Even as Christians, we have turmoil. Our faith in God is not a panacea. We just have someone to turn to when all hell breaks out in our lives. You’ve come here to church on a day that we do not have service. Obviously, you need something other than a sermon.”

“You’re right. I need answers, not therapy. I spent my last two years in that. My only hope is God. I’m hoping that He gets through to me. I thought if I came here then God might speak to me. I’ve been waiting for Him to do something but nothing seems to be happening.”

“Oh, something has been happening all right to make you come here. Maybe you should just give yourself to God and let him work things out.”

“That would be such a relief.” Again Joe looked up at the cross.

The man stood up and touched Joe’s head. “Close your eyes, Joe, and when you do think about the cross. All your life you have made choices. With each one you have stepped further away from God. This time step toward Him.”

Joe felt a numb sensation start in his hands. Tears lined his eyes and spilled over. They came faster and harder, hitting the pew. Lord, do something inside of me .

A fog rolled in around him. In it, he saw Hudson staggering up the stairs. Bring me to you, Lord. The door at the top of the building opened. Hudson shivers from the cold wind. Free me of this guilt and shame. Hudson looks around, not knowing where he is. Lead me, Lord, in the path of your righteousness. Hudson steps off the side of the building. Show me how I can make things right. He sees Lucy’s face looking at him with trust. Change me .

A blinding light flashed in front of Joe. He tried to open his eyes, but the rays were so penetrating he felt it would blind him. When the light ceased, Joe slowly opened his eyes. He found himself face down on the carpeted altar. Alone in the dark church, he looked at his watch and was surprised to see hours had passed.

It was time to get back to the paper. By now, everyone would be wondering where he was. Joe staggered to his feet glad no one was around to see him in this condition. Whatever condition it was, it felt good. Real good . Like a toddler learning to walk for the first time and proud of his accomplishment. By the time he reached the door, he felt able to navigate himself to the street.

Joe walked to the car and drove back to the newspaper patting his chest softly as though he were a kid filled with excitement to see what gift waited for him under the Christmas tree. Inside his spirit the feeling of hopelessness was gone. He was certain Hudson was gone right along with it, all of the guilt and angst was replaced by feelings of peace and splendor. It was overflowing, bubbling up from within as an Artesian well.

Even though he spent an enormous amount of time shedding tears on the floor of the church as God’s love filled him, he still kept tearing. Filling like a leaky garden hose, the only person in the world he wanted to see at this moment was sweet Lucy. Maybe she could explain what had just happened to him back at the church. Suddenly, he wanted to learn about God.

Joe looked around at the fields and the hills and the wide-open sky. He loved it here. He was home for the first time in his life. It seemed like the right time to tell Lucy everything. He now had faith she would receive it. Then he would tell her he loved her.

As he turned the corner, his heart dropped. Angela Steel’s car was parked directly in front of the newspaper. The Illinois license plates on her Mustang were unmistakable. She was the last person he wanted to see right now.

Joe pulled up beside the sports car, hoping to see Angela still behind the wheel. No good. She wasn’t there. That meant she was inside. In looking at the parking lot, he knew Lucy was inside along with Ulilla, Carol, Abe and others. What was Angela saying to them all? The old Joe would have backed out and not dealt with it at all, but today’s Joe bowed his head and offered up the first prayer of his life. Help . He liked it. It was short and to the point. Joe considered it a good start.

The familiar jingle of the overhead bell rang as Joe walked in. Maybe it was time he got it all out in the open. The truth would be cleansing. Or the truth would destroy them all .

“Here he is now!” Monica blurted out at the top of her lungs. She gave him a slip of a smile. “Joe McNamara, welcome to your life.”

Joe looked around. Angela was nowhere in sight. Neither was Lucy for that matter. In fact, the room was empty except for Monica at the front desk. Not only did that mean they were all together in one spot but it also translated into bad news for him.

“Where is everybody?” Joe asked, needing to hear the answer.

“In the break room.” Monica snapped her gum and then followed right behind him. “Ya know, Joe…that Angela Steel looks like she’d be a very good letter writer. Would pink happen to be her favorite color?”

Joe had no idea what Monica was jabbering about. Nervous energy quickly replaced the calm he was feeling just moments earlier. Angela showing up here unexpectedly like this was rotten timing. By now, he just wanted to shuffle Angela out of here. The truth could wait.

All heads turned as he walked into the room. Today, Angela wore her auburn hair down, pulled back by the diamond clip he had given her for her birthday. Her green eyes flashed. “Joe, there you are.” She looked stunning.

“Here I am,” he answered nonchalantly as though there was no reason for panic.

Lucy looked at Joe with fire in her eyes. He could only imagine what she was thinking. Just having found God, he felt right in the middle of his first trouble. Big trouble of the worst kind. Maybe he didn’t have to work through his problems alone anymore. There was God now. “So you found our little town and newspaper,” he said to Angela apprehensively.

“Yes, and it wasn’t easy either,” Angela complained. “Do you realize all the country roads look exactly the same?”

“Yea, I think that has been mentioned before.” Joe combed his fingers through his thick brown hair as he looked again at Lucy. She was trying hard to smile. It wasn’t working. When she spread her lips to grin, they quivered. Don’t cry, my love. Joe decided not to look at Lucy anymore. It was too hard. Fully aware of how she felt about him, he could only imagine what she felt like at this moment and it pained him that he couldn’t do anything about it at this instant. He had to ride this storm out. “Angela, what brings you to Turtle Creek?”

“I think that is rather obvious. You do, my darling.” Angela got up from her seat and walked across the linoleum floor to him. Her high-heeled shoes made click-clack sounds as she went. She gave him a hug. He responded out of politeness and quite by accident caught a glimpse of Lucy’s expression. Her pain hurt him such that he had to shut his eyes.

“We better leave them alone. Come on, everyone, back to work,” Lucy’s voice shook. She brushed past Joe and Angela.

It was hard for Joe to let Lucy walk by. They had just started building a promising relationship and now this would set that progress back. Joe wanted to reach out and pull her back. He wanted to take her to the Cotton Candy House, sit on the porch and tell her how much she meant to him. He wanted her to know the full story of why he had originally come to Turtle Creek. Instead he had to stay in the break room with Angela and cover the same ground they had been going over for the past few years.

“Angela, I hope everything all right.” Joe shut the door.

“I miss you and wanted to personally deliver the invitation to my birthday party next weekend.” She held out an envelope.

Joe read it. “I can’t come.” He tried handing it back to her.

“But you must, since you are my only guest. You don’t want me to spend my birthday all by myself, do you?” Angela tried to kiss him.

Joe pulled back. “I’m sure there are a half dozen men ready to step into my shoes. You will hardly be alone.”

“I don’t care about them. I care about you. About us.”

“I’m really sorry, Angela.” Joe hung his head.

Angela burst into tears.

“Please don’t do this, Angela.” Joe held her. He considered her a wonderful person and didn’t feel she deserved the nightmare he had put her through. Years ago, he had planned on proposing to Angela. Those were the pre-Hudson days. Since then Hudson had reshaped his entire existence. Lucy had redefined his love. Now, there was God. He wasn’t altogether sure how that would all work out but he knew his life was forever changed. He wasn’t the same man Angela had once known.

“I believe you will come back to me,” Angela spoke with passion. “I had to see you and tell you I will wait forever if I have to.” Angela looked into his eyes. “There was a time you couldn’t go a day without seeing me and calling me a half dozen times. Now it takes nearly a supernatural act to get hold of you and when I do, you seem so distant. Joe, are you still taking your meds?”

“Don’t. Don’t blame how I am on that.” Joe pulled back and walked away from her. “Just know I did love you, once. Those feelings were not an act.”

“But when there was that accident…”

“You need to go on with your life away from me.” Joe tried to keep distance between them, not wanting her to come closer. She looked so pitiful. It was easy to remember what they used to mean to one another. Angela had stayed with him during a difficult time. Not many women would have done that. He wished he could reward her by returning her love but that was impossible. He wasn’t the same person. He had changed years ago. He still remembered how they used to be; those feelings didn’t evaporate, but the people they once were had.

“If it’s something else you want…another career, I can wait. I have done it before, just as long as I know I am the one you come home to. That is my one stipulation.” Angela searched for Kleenex in her purse and blew her nose, wiping tears from her face.

“Angela, please, don’t wait for me. We have no future together.”

She took out her compact, finished wiping her face and applied powder to her splotchy face. “I would ask you to please not share the purpose of my visit with your new friends; I do not care for anyone to know our private affairs.”

“Of course not.”

“I don’t know how to find my way back to the interstate.”

“I’ll follow you out and show you.”

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Sixteen

Ulilla, Monica and Lucy stood at the window and watched as Joe walked Angela to her car. There was no denying that the woman was gorgeous. She even looked beautiful trudging through the icy snow in heels with the wind whipping her hair about her head.

Joe and Angela huddled together as they talked. Lucy would have given anything to hear what they were discussing. It had to be important to keep standing out in this kind of weather. No matter how much she wanted to, Lucy couldn’t look away. She searched for some sign from Joe that displayed his displeasure but it was hard to read his expression from where she stood.

Occasionally Angela pulled at the lapels on Joe’s coat. Joe would shake his head and then touch her face. They sure did seem like lovers.

“Just look at the way that woman is stroking Joe’s face!” Monica seethed.

“My gag reflex is kicking in.” Ulilla rubbed her stomach as if to illustrate her point.

When Angela finally got into her car to leave, Lucy breathed a sigh of relief until Joe got into his car and followed her out of the parking lot. It made her nauseous.

Now it was Lucy’s turn to grab her coat and get into her car. She wasn’t following them, as everyone supposed. Lucy drove to the place she always went whenever she felt upset. She dreamed of fat pillows and fresh sheets hanging on a summer clothesline. Maybe a dog in the yard. She’d bake cookies in her kitchen and bring them to work for everyone. Most of all, it would be her place. Her first house, a forever home.

She drove down County O and soon found herself turning onto Sugar Plum Road. She drove a few more miles until the road ended. The sunlight never seemed to reach the turn onto the driveway so she always had to be careful of the ice. Today, however, the ice was melted. The entrance to the property seemed odd. Dozens of the trees had been cut. Perhaps the constant barrage of wind had damaged some and a tree crew had come along to take the trees down safely.

Come spring, she’d replant more trees, but right now, all Lucy wanted to do was see her house. Just a few more weeks and she’d be living right here. Maybe Joe would remember his promise to buy her rocking chairs for the front porch. Joe . Lucy rubbed tears from her cheeks.

Lucy maneuvered her car along the winding driveway and then jammed on the brakes. The house wasn’t there. It was an empty field. In her ‘Angela’ upset, Lucy figured she had taken the wrong turn somewhere. Of course. That had to be it. She should have sensed that by the absence of trees in the drive’s entrance. Lucy backed around and drove out to get a good look at the road sign. Sure enough the road sign read Sugar Plum Road but now she saw another sign. A much larger metal sign with professionally printed words on it in large letters— Welcome to the Future Home of The Regional Newspaper, Oliver and Duckworth, owners .

This had to be a mistake. The bank had agreed to wait until the first of the year when she had enough of a down payment to buy the place. Lucy drove right back down the road. This time she drove too quickly for the road conditions and slid several times. Finally, she made it back to where the house used to stand.

She leaned over the steering wheel blinking her eyes. It was unmistakable. She was at the right place but the house was gone. In the last few days, someone had swept in with their greed and arrogance and knocked down a lovely, century-old house and now had begun hacking out the trees. Although it meant nothing to them, it meant everything to her.

Tears burned on Lucy’s cheeks as she got out of the car into the cold air and walked the property line searching for something from the house that the clean-up crew might have missed. There was nothing left behind. Nothing. Forever gone were the fireflies and the Christmas lights. Forever gone was the dancing in the moonlight. Forever gone were her flowers and vegetable garden and every dream she ever prayed.

Lucy scrambled back to the car. She headed straight to the bank. Once inside, she raised a ruckus and demanded to speak to the loan officer. Trying to quiet her, Lucy was instantly led to the loan officer’s desk.

“I was just at the property on Sugar Plum Road,” she stated with her hands on her hips. “You promised me I would get a loan as soon as I put down my deposit. I told you I would have it by the first of the year.”

“Someone else got their money in before you,” he batted his eyelids behind thick glasses.

“You told me the property wasn’t going anywhere!”

“At the time of our conversation, that was the case,” he told her. “But the following month, the situation changed when Oliver and Duckworth offered the full asking price in cash.”

“You could have called me to tell me. After all, I was pre-approved!” Lucy hit his desk with her open hand.

“We are not able to hold out for someone who may or may not have the money by a certain date. I am sorry for your disappointment but there are other properties just as nice that you can buy.”

Lucy wanted to pull off his glasses and step on them. Instead, she composed herself, did an about face and slammed out of the bank. Tears were streaming down her cheeks the whole time but she kept her composure as much as possible.

Right now, all she thought about was seeing Joe. He would be as upset about it as she was. In her rearview mirror, she saw a police officer flash his lights at her and she pulled over to the side of the road.

“Lucy, you were going forty in a thirty mile zone. Did you know that?”

“No.” Lucy looked straight ahead.

“I can tell by the expression on your face that you are upset about something, but you’d be more upset if you hurt someone. Right now I am going to let you off with just a warning but I suggest you find a safe place to cool off.” The officer handed her the paper and was on his way.

Lucy sat at the side of the road for several more minutes. She asked the Lord to calm her spirit so she could see past this situation. There was a reason for everything that had happened today. She just had to start believing it was so.

Lucy drove to the office within the speed limit. When she parked her car, she didn’t see Joe’s in the parking lot. Maybe he parked it on the street. Lucy blazed through the front door of the office and stood front and center trying to see if Joe had come back. He wasn’t at his desk.

“What’s wrong?” Monica asked in surprise and then followed her friend into the break room.

“Where’s Joe? I’ve got to see him.” She circled the room. “Please don’t tell me he is still with Angela!”

“I don’t know where he is. He never says where he is going when he leaves. He just goes. When he went this last time, he was following Angela out.”

“From now on, he has to let us know where he can be reached. Do you hear me? That is my new rule!” Lucy walked around the office rubbing her head. “They tore it down, Monica. The other newspaper is coming to town and they tore down my house so they can build there.”

“But the bank had the house on hold for you, didn’t they?” Monica asked with surprise.

“Evidentially not! They don’t seem to have a lay-away plan!” Lucy threw her arms up in the air. “A better offer…in cash…was made and so the deal and the papers were processed.”

“When did this happen?”

“I am not sure when it happened but they have already closed on the property and went right to work tearing down that old house. Did I mention they took a lot of the trees, too?”

Monica shook her head no.

“They are taking out trees. Those gorgeous old trees.”

Lucy went into her dad’s office and with rapid-fire googled the names Oliver and Duckworth. To her dismay, up came pages of information. She clicked her mouse on the first link.

‘Oliver and Duckworth are leading businesses who are on the march of reinventing the way business is being done this century. That’s the world of entrepreneurs these days. This partnership is turning the business world on its head.

Sure, they take over businesses that are painfully primitive. That’s not the point. They represent power. Look at it this way. In the age of capitalism, most small businesses are just treading water. Not so with Oliver and Duckworth. They have an uncanny perspective of predicting future trends and can smell a good deal thousands of miles away. This ability has taken them global.

This is just the beginning…’

Closing out the page, Lucy couldn’t read anymore. Lucy swiveled around in her chair and looked out the window at the snowy fields and the huge sky holding promises of more snow.

Someone tapped at the door. “Go away!” she hollered.

“Even me?” Joe stood in the doorway, looking at Lucy sadly. “Yeah, I heard. Monica told me. I’m really sorry, Lucy.”

“Me, too.”

Joe sat at the edge of the desk. “There are other old houses you can buy; Wisconsin is full of them.”

“Not pink ones.”

“I know it won’t be the same as this one but you could paint another one pink. I’ll even help,” Joe offered.

“But I don’t know if I can handle a different house. I loved that pink house on that land…”

“Wait, as I remember, we recently had a field trip where I saw miles of farmland. Maybe your next house will be on land that has a creek running through it.” He smiled sweetly.

“I wish the problem could be solved as easily as just buying another house.” Lucy stood up and walked to the window. “The bigger problem is the other newspaper is in town. They have land and will be building before spring. That seals the fate of this newspaper. You may be looking for another job sooner than you think.”

“We’re not done fighting them, Lucy. Look at the progress we have already made in just a few weeks time. Just this morning Carol counted nine new advertisers who are locked in for a year with us. Surrounding area towns are starting to carry our newspaper. Don’t give up just when the miracle is so close.”

“Miracle?” Lucy turned around with a jolt. “I have never heard you talk like this before. Why the change now?”

Joe breathed in deeply. “There is something in the air this Christmas, Lucy Collins. I am calling it a miracle.”

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Seventeen

December 19

Joe spent all morning on the phone in her dad’s office. He said he was drumming up more business for the newspaper. If that was true, she couldn’t figure why she couldn’t sit in with him and listen. But maybe what Joe told her wasn’t the real truth. He could be on the phone to Angela. If not, maybe he was putting out feelers for new job opportunities. Whatever the reason, all of the possibilities floating through her head made sure she didn’t get any work done and she kept glancing toward the door to check on him.

The office door finally opened. Joe looked exhausted as though he had been on the phone all night, instead of a couple of hours.

“Boy, you look as though you’ve been through the ringer. Is everything all right?” Lucy asked.

“Just fine. Couldn’t be better.” Joe slipped into his heavy coat and buttoned it up. Joe paused a second. “Maybe it’ll turn out to be something really great. At any rate, I better take off. I have a meeting.”

“A meeting, huh? Maybe I can tag along and see you using your gift of persuasion.” Lucy caught hold of Joe’s coat’s lapels just as Angela had. She was close enough for him to kiss her lips.

From the corner of her eye she caught Ulilla staring at them. Joe must have seen her, too, sitting there smiling at them with her elbows resting on the desk, chin in her hands. “Young love,” she sung out.

It made him draw back. “I’ll see you tonight,” he promised. “I’ll take you to dinner. You can choose the spot. I’ll pick you up at your place. Does six sound okay?”

“Six sounds perfect. But, I must warn you, I expect you to tell me what this secret meeting’s about.” Lucy walked into the office and closed the door, trying to figure out what Joe was up to.

She sat down and kept her hands in her lap. Her eyes scanned the top of the desk. Nothing seemed to be out of place and yet he had been sitting right here all morning. She needed a clue. If he was already scouting out job possibilities then she needed to know. If he was in a romantic relationship with Angela, she needed to know that most of all. Her heart had to be protected.

Lucy held the mouse and clicked through the history on her computer, only to find it erased. That sent up a red flag. He was hiding something from her. Now Lucy looked at the telephone. She picked up the receiver and pressed redial. The office number came up. There was only one reason he would call the office while he was at the office. Joe deliberately dialed that number to cover for his last call. Her stomach tightened.

Just as she was about to give up, she saw the yellow pad. There wasn’t anything written on the top sheet but there had been a paper torn off leaving the imprint on the page below. Lucy rubbed over it lightly with her pencil. The words Clear Water Restaurant surfaced.

Joe had mentioned dinner. Maybe this is where he was taking her tonight. As Lucy went over copy for next week’s paper, thoughts kept niggling at her. Joe was scoring some impressive endorsements in the area along with ad space being bought up, but then there were those private meetings she couldn’t be a part of. It was as if he was making negations on his own. That didn’t set well.

Lucy also found it perplexing that Joe was so attentive to her and yet there were wine bottles and love notes in his apartment. Was this tied in with Angela? Beautiful…gorgeous Angela. She had been gone for a few days now and Joe never explained anything about that visit. Not that he had to. There was no obligation between them. Yet, why didn’t he? If there was nothing to hide, then why not come right out with it?

She opened her office door. From where she stood, she could see to the back of the main room where Joe had moved his desk. Monica had searched his apartment and brought back plenty of information. Now Lucy wondered if a search of his desk was in order. It might be better just to leave things be and let them play out on their own.

A battle of wills broke out inside of her…the insecure one who wanted to find out once and for all what was going on with him and the other side who was filled with faith. Slowly, she approached Joe’s desk trying to figure out what kind of a person he really was and if she should plunge ahead and go through his personal business. She needed answers for both her professional and personal lives.

“Hey,” Monica hooked her arm. “Didn’t you hear me?”

“What?” Lucy was so focused on her thoughts that she blocked out all other sound. “I’m sorry, what did you say?”

“I just asked if I can take my lunch now.”

“Sure, I guess.” Lucy looked across the room at the clock. “Wait. Have you ever heard of the restaurant Clear Water? ”

“Sure have. It’s a new restaurant in Williams Bay. I hear they have wonderful fresh fish and salads.”

“Why don’t I take my lunch break with you and we can eat there?” Lucy offered.

“Really?” Monica scrunched up her nose. “Your dad only gives us thirty minutes to eat and it will take that long just to drive there.”

“Dad is on vacation, remember? We can take as long as we’d like.”

“I love how you think! Let me grab my purse and off we go!” Monica danced to the counter and pulled out her purse. “Ready!”

****

“Fancy place.” Lucy looked around approvingly from where they sat toward the back of the restaurant. Each table had a linen tablecloth and the room was lit with chandeliers to create the mood. “It’s really busy today for lunch, too. Just about all the tables are taken which should be a sign of good food.”

“And expensive, too.” Monica looked through the menu.

Lucy glanced at the prices, too, and had to agree with Monica. “Don’t worry; I asked you so this is my Christmas treat to you.”

“That’s not…”

“Yes, my friend, it is. Now, let’s change the subject.”

Monica sighed but gave up that current discussion. “I have been meaning to ask. How’ve things been between you and Joe since Angela blew out of town?”

“Okay, I guess.” Lucy hummed tapping her foot anxiously.

“Any mention of the love letters or the wine?”

“Nope. He’s my mystery man, for sure.”

“Didn’t he ever explain who Angela is?”

“Nope.” Lucy shrugged setting down her menu.

“Mike told me your mom found you two in his car in the driveway.”

“Of course, she did. We drove home together and I hadn’t gotten out yet.”

“Is that all?” Monica seemed disappointed.

“Yep.”

“The way Mike tells it, neither one of you was in a hurry to go anywhere.”

“My family needs to stop meddling in my affairs. It’s way past time for me to move out and live on my own.” Lucy shook out her napkin and laid it across her lap.

“Maybe you can move in with me.”

With Mike spending more and more time at Monica’s, it was really the last place she’d move to. For now, Lucy didn’t say anything; she just smiled and thanked God for a friend like Monica.

When the waitress came, the two of them ordered the fish of the day and their salad. While they waited for their food, Monica squinted and frowned. Then she dug around inside of her purse for her glasses. She put them on and starred across the room again.

“What are you looking at?” Lucy’s heart sunk and she was afraid to turn around.

“Lucy! I think I see Joe. He isn’t alone.” Monica’s whisper sent shivers down her back.

“You’re kidding!” Lucy gasped and started to turn in her chair.

“Don’t look! Don’t look!” Monica handed her back the menu. “Cover your face! Don’t let him see you!”

“Is he with Angela?” Lucy asked behind her menu.

“No, he’s with a couple of men.”

“Thank goodness.” Lucy sighed with relief and put down her menu. She swiveled in her chair to take a quick look. “You’re right; it is Joe. Well, at least he isn’t eating with Angela. Or some other woman.”

“I wonder who they are.” Monica pondered.

“It’s none of our business, really.” Lucy felt giddy with relief.

“Well, not two minutes ago, you were about to make it your business when you thought Joe was sitting with some woman,” Monica snapped.

“Joe is entitled to a private life, ya know? I mean it’s not up to us to know everything there is about him.”

“Well then, should we ask them to join us?”

“I still don’t want him to see us. I think he wants to bring me here when he takes me out for dinner tonight,” Lucy whispered. “I don’t want to spoil the surprise for him.”

“I want to know who those men are that he is talking to. You can’t tell me you aren’t the least bit interested in finding out,” Monica reached for her glass and sipped the water.

“Um, I believe you’re right. I was just so glad Joe wasn’t dining with another woman I momentarily lost my focus. Okay, how do we get that information?” Lucy drummed her fingers on the table.

The waitress arrived with their plates. She set them down in front of the women. “Is there anything else I can get for you, ladies?”

“There is.” Monica smiled at her. “Do you know the names of those three men seated at the far table by the front windows? I could swear I know them from somewhere.”

“Oh, I don’t, off hand. Are you ladies interested in one of them?” the waitress smiled.

“In a way.” Lucy cut in.

“I’ll see what I can do, but it might take a while.” The waitress left.

“Eat slowly. Hopefully, they won’t notice us,” Lucy moved the food around her plate without really picking any up. “What are they doing now?”

“Eating.”

When their meal was over, Lucy ordered dessert. And then another. “I’m gaining weight just sitting here waiting for them to leave.”

“Hold on just a bit more because it looks as though they’re paying for their meals right now. Finally, we can leave,” Monica sighed.

At that moment, Lucy looked up and locked eyes with Joe. He smiled at her as he dropped bills on the table. After a word with the men, Joe came to their table. “Hey, I didn’t see you walk in.”

“Look who is here, Monica, it’s Joe.”

“Hi Joe, we didn’t see you,” Monica said.

“Did you have a nice lunch?” Lucy smiled her sweetest, most innocent smile.

“Sure did. If you don’t mind, I need to get going, but I will see you tonight for dinner. I’ll pick you up at six?” Joe gave her a nudge.

“Will there be more moonlight dancing for us afterward?” Lucy asked.

“Maybe.”

“Drive safely back to the paper and don’t get lost!” Lucy waved as though she wasn’t the least bit concerned.

“I plan on taking the rest of the afternoon off if that’s all right with you, Boss?”

“Of course, as long as your work is done, there is no sense in just sitting there.”

“That’s what I thought, too. See you both later.” With that, Joe walked out the door, and at the same time, the waitress stopped by Lucy’s table with the bill and pressed a piece of paper into her hand. “One paid with cash but the other two paid with credit cards, which is how I got their names. Don’t tell anyone I did this, please, or I could lose my job.”

“I won’t tell a soul. It’s our little secret because I have a lot to lose as well.”

After paying the bill, the women hurried to the car, laughing all the way. They had gotten the information they needed.

“If the newspaper fails, Lucy, you should apply with the FBI to be a spy,” Monica guffawed.

“I’ll be sure to hire you as my assistant.” Lucy sat in the driver’s seat and stared at the folded paper in the palm of her hand. She unfolded it and screamed. Ryan Oliver and Matthew Duckworth were the words scrawled on the paper.

“These are the names of Joe’s lunch companions.” Lucy passed the paper to Monica.

“Oh my gosh, Lucy! What do you think they’re up to?”

“I think they’re trying to get Joe to be their editor.” Lucy sat with the car running. She was too upset to drive yet.

“That has to be it, and I bet they can pay a whole lot more than you do.”

“And they are probably impressed with how he has increased our sales and gotten new advertisers.” Lucy watched shoppers walking along the snowy streets. Empathically, she added, “Do not say anything to anyone. Not my parents, not Ulilla, and certainly not Mike!”

“What makes you think I would tell Mike anything?”

“Because you two are dating.” Lucy winked at her. “Listen, I am glad you and my brother like each other, but that doesn’t give you license to tell him everything. No one can know about Joe meeting Oliver and Duckworth. Not yet. I have to figure out how to approach it with Joe.” Lucy put the car in gear and backed out of the space. She couldn’t get to the office fast enough.

Since Joe said he wasn’t returning to the newspaper today, Lucy went straight to his desk. Lucy shook the mouse of his laptop. The screen came back to life but Joe had locked his computer. Lucy sat down. She looked at the drawers for a moment before yanking out the bottom left drawer. She dug through it. Then she went for the top narrow drawer. There was his daytimer. Flipping it open, she found all the pages before December first had been torn out. She read through it, finding nothing new. Today was marked as LUNCH. She closed the daytimer and put it back into the drawer. She moved on to the top right drawer finding pencils, pens, erasers, and a small dictionary.

“If you tell me what you are looking for, maybe I can help you find it.” Joe was staring down at her, his expression furious.

She looked up at him in disbelief. “First, tell me about your lunch today.”

“I didn’t realize I was supposed to report to you on my whereabouts when I wasn’t here.” Joe didn’t appear ready to back down.

Lucy stood to her feet, humiliated he had caught her going through his things.

“Lucy, John Friedman is on line one for you,” Monica called from the front desk. “Want to take it in your dad’s office?”

“Yes, I do.” Lucy was glad to get away from Joe. She closed the door and felt safe. “Hello, John?”

“I have the contract ready and I’m at my lake home, if you want to come over for it. I can explain it to you when I see you. Pretty straight forward, actually.”

“Thanks, John. I appreciate you doing this for me.” Lucy wasn’t sure she even wanted Joe to sign it now but she couldn’t just ignore the work John had done for her. “How about if I come over tomorrow after work?”

“I thought we’d have dinner.”

“I would love to have dinner with you,” Lucy wasn’t sure how much of her agreeing was to get back at Joe for all his secrets and how much was wanting to be with a good friend. She pulled the phone cord as she moved around to the other side of the desk.

“Sounds good. By the way, how did you ever get a psychiatrist such as Joseph McNamara working for you at the paper?”

Alarm slammed into Lucy. Her knees buckled as she sunk into the chair behind her. “What did you say?”

“Don’t tell me you didn’t know this about him?”

“He told me he graduated with a degree in Journalism.”

“That’s right, he did. He also graduated with a degree in psychology and then went onto Harvard for his medical degree.”

“He did say he worked with files in a Chicago hospital.”

“I would imagine he did paperwork like any doctor but he is pretty well known for his other work in Chicago.”

“I never checked on his references,” Lucy admitted.

“Well, it seems to have worked out well this time, but in the future, I would suggest you thoroughly check out someone before you hire them.”

“Point well taken; thanks, John.”

“I will see you tomorrow then?”

“What time?”

“About six, there’s a new restaurant that just opened up in Williams Bay…”

“Clear Water?”

“Yes, that one. Have you been there?”

“Yes, today, as a matter of fact.” Lucy didn’t want to talk about dinner. She wanted to get back out there and confront Joe. “I don’t mean to be rude, John, but I have a situation here that needs my immediate attention. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Lucy returned the phone to the cradle. She rubbed her face with both her hands trying to think.

Now all those odd little idiosyncrasies about Joe began to fit together as a puzzle and she saw the complete picture. Of course, Joe was some kind of a medical doctor. He knew a lot about cold laser treatment and was concerned that Ulilla treat her cold properly. These were just for starters. She remembered his exercise advice for her elbow and even his concern over her dad’s previous heart attack.

Then it also occurred to Lucy that psychiatrists were trained in how to ask questions in order to get people to open up to them, thus his successful interviews. He could read people. He read her and used her. Perhaps Oliver and Duckworth were in on this, too. Maybe they planted him in this office. Her stomach felt queasy. Lucy opened the office door to find Joe packing up his laptop. She couldn’t tell if he was going home for the night or forever.

“May I speak to you for a moment, Doctor McNamara?”

Now it was Joe’s turn to look surprised but he recovered faster than she did. “So you did a background check on me?” he answered disgustedly.

“Why should it matter if you don’t have anything to hide? Anyway, this isn’t about me. It’s about you and you deceiving us.” Lucy walked closer to him. Her anger rose making her hands shake and her voice quiver. “You’ve been working undercover for those men you had lunch with today, haven’t you?”

Joe began walking toward the door.

She stepped in front of him to block his path. “You owe everyone here an explanation.”

Ulilla, Carol, Monica, and Mike stopped their work to listen.

Joe still didn’t answer. He stared down at the floor.

“Hey, everyone!” Lucy called out. “I would like you to meet Doctor Joseph McNamara. He’s a top psychiatrist in Chicago, has his medical degree and everything.”

“Oh, so I was seeing a real doctor after all about my aches and pains. I feel so much better now,” Ulilla said.

“He has studied how to manipulate people and that training helped him use us all. Now he has sold out everything he knows about us, including how vulnerable we are, to the enemy Oliver and Duckworth. Right, Joe? Isn’t that what all these secret meetings have been about?”

Joe looked at Lucy. His voice was soft when he spoke, “Don’t do this, Lucy.”

“Don’t do this or what? You’ll quit? I don’t think you ever really worked here.” Lucy turned on her heels and went into her dad’s office, slamming the door behind her.

Joe continued on out the door.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Eighteen

December 20

Joe had cleaned his things from the apartment hours ago. He was gone. It seemed as if he had never really been here. Lucy stood in the small kitchenette, wishing it were not so. But she couldn’t blame him. What other recourse was there since she had accused him of selling out and using everyone at the newspaper, including her. He didn’t defend himself. Never tried to. He packed up and left. Either he was guilty which made him leave. Or he was totally innocent and left because she jumped to a terrible conclusion without asking him for his side. Her family and employees stood divided in their own opinions. Ulilla, Carol, Abe and her parents were on one side while Monica and Mike were on the other. Lucy straddled both sides.

Lucy went to the pantry. Cans of tuna fish, beans, and soup remained, labels facing out. In the freezer were still a few frozen dinners and pizzas. The fridge was totally empty and clean. Lucy walked through the other rooms and found them to be immaculate and tidy. Even the garbage had been dumped.

She sat on the bed and ran her hand over the spread thinking about Joe sleeping here. Lucy gazed out the window. It was then she noticed he had a perfect view of their cabin. She couldn’t help but wonder if he had looked out of this window at night as much as she looked out her window toward him. But she would never know.

Lucy checked out the dresser drawers. All empty, as was the closet. She checked the drawer to the side table. Empty. She felt empty. Joe’s departure was for the best. Try as she did, she couldn’t come up with any other explanation of why a psychiatrist came to town to work on their newspaper and meet privately with the men whose aim was to put them out of business. Joe played her. It made her heart ache. What an easy target she had been. How could she explain this to her parents and her friends at the paper?

For now she had to put everything aside. There was too much to be done at the newspaper.

She was looking forward to dinner with John this evening; maybe there was something his legal mind could come up with to block Oliver and Duckworth from coming to town.

****

They sat facing one another across the table. The view of Lake Delavan was spectacular. Lights dotted the frozen shoreline. It was another freezing day outside in a string of very cold weeks, but it was nice and toasty warm inside by the dining room fire.

Lucy picked up her fork and stabbed a few pieces of the spinach salad. “I never expected our dinner invitation meant that your housekeeper would be preparing our meal right here.”

“I thought eating in would be more private. I trust that is okay with you.”

“This is great.” Lucy bit into the salad as she looked across the table at John. Dark curly hair, winning smile, gentle soul with a trap mind for legalese. They had been friends for years and she always felt comfortable with him. He was clever, cute and kind. “This is so delicious, John. I always enjoy it when we’re able to get together.”

“The last time we had dinner together was just at the end of summer. You may not believe this, since I haven’t called, but believe me when I say I’ve missed seeing you. Not that I am trying to excuse myself but this fall I took on a few cases I’ve been consumed with. I believe the last time we were together you mentioned hoping to become manager of the newspaper. Is that still your plan?”

“At this moment, yes, although Dad plans to be carried out feet first from the place. Retirement is a swear word as far as he is concerned.” Nerves were the order of the evening reducing Lucy’s desire for food. Having eaten just enough of it not to be considered rude, she pushed her salad aside. “I’m sorry but I don’t seem to have much of an appetite tonight.”

“Okay, Lucy, this isn’t like you. I have known you for at least ten years and never have you turned down a meal. What’s going on?”

“The newspaper is in real trouble; there’s another newspaper coming to town. They’ve already bought land and are breaking ground as soon as it thaws. Behind them is money and power so it’s just a matter of time before they put us out of business.”

“Really?” John seemed upset for her, which she found both comforting and endearing.

“I’m afraid so.” Lucy nodded and looked out at the frozen lake.

“Your family business goes back to the early nineteen hundreds, if I’m not mistaken. That was way before there were any other papers in the area.”

“John, I need your help,” Lucy replied with optimism.

“Sure. Just tell me what I can do.”

“I need for you to find…” Lucy stopped while the housekeeper cleared the table for the appetizers, fresh shrimp cocktail on ice. He set one serving in front of Lucy and the next in front of John.

When he left the room, John prodded, “Okay, what were you saying?”

“Is there a legal way to block the other paper from building in our town?”

“Lucy, this isn’t my law specialty. I do know there has to be legal grounds to prevent them. I know enough to give only the minimum of legal advice. However, I do know someone who is very good and I’ll talk to him about this, okay?” John dipped a shrimp into the sauce and ate it in one bite, leaving only the tail.

“This sounds expensive.” Lucy nibbled on her shrimp.

“It will be expensive. If it were me doing this, I would do it pro bono, but this man is a colleague and I can’t ask him to do this work for anything less than what he charges his clients.”

“Oh, I don’t expect you to, John. If I came across that way…”

“Forget it. You’re fine, as usual.” he waved away her concern. “By the way, once we’re done with dinner, we can go over the contract you asked me to draw up for your new editor.”

Lucy’s stomach knotted at the reference to Joe. “John, I’m really sorry you have gone to so much trouble for me. It turns out we don’t need the contract after all. Dr. McNamara is no longer employed with us.”

“That’s a shame. I wish I could have gotten this to you a lot faster, but I can’t say as I am really surprised. A popular and well-known Chicago psychiatrist working as an editor for a small town newspaper doesn’t add up. So he quit, huh?”

“Yea, right after I discovered he was also working for Oliver and Duckworth.”

“Oliver and Duckworth?”

“They’re the owners of the newspaper that is coming to town.”

“He worked for you and for them?” John’s jaw dropped right along with a shrimp. The shrimp he dropped on the white linen tablecloth left a red cocktail stain when he picked it up.

“I strongly suspect Joe was giving our competitors inside information of how we planned to increase sales and productivity. In fact, Joe even gave us some of the ideas, which we have already implemented.”

John slammed his hand down on the table. “That’s it!”

Lucy jumped. “That’s what?”

“That’s illegal.” Lucy could almost see the legal wheels turning in John’s head as he began to run the law through his mind. “Generally working for two companies is not illegal, even if they are competitors. However, if the person has signed non-compete or non-disclosure agreements, then by disclosing information to the competing company the employee may have breached the agreement. Ah, oh. By the look on your face, I can tell you didn’t have Joe sign one.”

“It never entered my mind.” Lucy frowned.

“Well, if Joe is using the information to harm the company, in this case The Turtle Creek Newspaper, there may be a civil remedy of damages and an injunction available.”

“An injunction to stop them from building?” Lucy asked.

“Perhaps, but you should know blocking a business like Oliver and Duckworth from coming to town is very expensive. It could tie you both up in court for years.”

“My family doesn’t have that kind of money. Forget it, John; we’ll just have to deal with whatever comes when it happens.” Then Lucy remembered something. “Wait, my dad shook hands with Joe on the assumption that was their contract. Will that work?”

“Were there witnesses to this agreement?”

“Yes, there sure were.”

“There certainly may be a case of constructive fraud then. It’s where an employee entered into a verbal contract with the company purportedly to work for it, when his true intent was to steal secrets or subvert its business. The fraud is in the act of interviewing and agreeing to an employment contract; it is implicit that the person is going to work for the company and not against it. If it can be shown that the person actually intended to harm the company then there was fraud in the inducement to hire. The proof must be clear and we’ll need evidence.”

“And how do I get this evidence?”

“Was he told that this was confidential information? Did he take any documents? Make photocopies? Did he do any of this while he was employed with you?” John fired off the questions.

“No, I never thought to mention that this was confidential. I am not sure he took any documents or made photocopies of anything. Sorry, but I think I may be our own worst witness.”

“This isn’t going to be easy, but you can still sue the other newspaper for tortuous interference with a business relationship, fraud, and contract violation. If the employee, Joe, gave information to a competitor, Oliver and Duckworth, then the employee has breached his agreement by not using his best efforts. Plus you can sue for damages.”

“Does it hurt that there was no written contract?”

“The handshake implied one, such as, I will do work for you and you will pay me or I will be an honest person who will put forth my best efforts for you. If we do this, I suggest we go after Joe first. He’ll have to pay out of his own pocket, if he is sued singularly. That way I would make sure he used his own money to defend himself. The strategy is this; make him feel it in his checkbook so severely that he makes a deal with you to give you information that allows you to win in a suit against the competing newspaper. If you sue Oliver and Duckworth and Joe at the same time, then the newspaper will likely cover or diminish all legal fees.”

“Should we go forward with this?”

“Lucy, there is no guarantee that anyone will win in this lawsuit and generally it is a Pyrrhic victory, which means you loose more than you win.”

“Then we’re back where we started. It’s hopeless.” The chain on Lucy’s cross broke and her cross dropped into the shrimp cocktail. Lucy found the end of the chain and pulled it out. “What a mess,” she complained.

“Let me have that cleaned up for you.” John reached across the table for the jewelry.

“No, no. It’s fine. Really.”

“Then let me give you this to wrap it up in to take home.” John removed a monogrammed handkerchief from his hip pocket and passed it over the table to her.

“Thanks.” Lucy folded the cross and chain into it and slipped it into her purse. “I think this is a sign that I’m losing my faith in God.”

“You can’t be serious,” John commented with surprise.

“I used to have my faith in God, and just when I considered taking retribution into my own hands, this happens. John, you are a gem to take your time to draw up a contract and now to offer advice.” Lucy smiled and signed. “I think it’s best I put the time into prayers instead of a lawsuit and allow the Lord to work things out.”

“Whatever you want, Lucy. I am here for you.”

“That means a lot to me. John, you’re the best.”

The housekeeper arrived with the prime rib and seared asparagus.

“This meal is wonderful. I am glad you invited me, but I’m always happy to hear your voice and get together,” Lucy admitted.

“We have been friends for a long time,” John acknowledged smiling warmly into her eyes.

“I remember when you came to our school. I was in third grade at the time. My earliest memory of you was when you got in trouble with the teacher and made to stand outside your fifth grade classroom in the hallway. That was the first time you spit water at me from the drinking fountain.”

John laughed. “I have always liked to stir things up. Speaking of which, I have a business proposition for you.”

“Oh?” Lucy took a drink of iced water.

John stopped cutting his meat and asked, “I need someone to manage my law office. There is no one I can think of who would do a better job than you. Up until this moment, I have procrastinated asking you because I know how committed you are to your family business…”

“And now that we are about to be obliterated, you thought I might need a job, right?”

“No, not right. I want to offer this opportunity to you because you are clearly the best person for the job.”

“I am honored.”

“And with you working right outside my office, you will remind me that life isn’t all about work and court cases. I would love to take our relationship to the next level. What do you say, Lucy? Come this spring, will you move to Milwaukee?”

****

December 24

The choir dressed as angels and sang Holy Night from the loft. The church’s lights had been dimmed and in their place, the congregation held miniature flashlights that looked like candles. Lucy sat in beside her parents with Mike and Monica in the pew right behind them, holding hands.

The irony of it all was that this was the service Joe had promised to write an article about for the newspaper. He wasn’t here to do it. Since he no longer worked for them, it fell to her to see the job through. Her words wouldn’t be anywhere as poetic as Joe would have written, but the job would be done nonetheless. Lucy picked up her camera and scooted sideways down the length of the pew. She found a spot along the wall where she wouldn’t block anyone’s view of the service.

Lucy adjusted the camera lens for wide perspective and then twisted the lens again for close-ups of the choir. Fortunately, with all the shots she planned on taking this evening, the sound of the camera clicks was drowned out by the singing and she used special film in order to avoid using the flash. Everyone was alive with Christmas spirit and anticipation of what waited for him or her at home. There’d be plenty of food and presents.

For the next few days, Lucy decided she would put away her emotional unrest. For too long, she had allowed situations to dictate her joy. Not anymore. Lucy had her own private moment with the Lord at the back of the church, while no one watched. She bowed her head and handed Him her misery. Here and now, I am going to love Christmas again, starting with this one , Lucy whispered to herself.

Pastor Owens looked especially serene tonight so she took a few close-ups—one had his hand crossing over in front of his face. It looked powerful captured in her lens. Joe’s voice was in her head. You’re like me. You see things no one else does. Lucy struggled, longing to see Joe again yet angry at him for fooling her.

Lucy moved locations trying to get the personal shots. The back door of the church opened. With hope filling her, Lucy turned about, expecting—hoping and praying—to see Joe, but it was Blanche and Herbert hurrying in. They waved at her and took a seat at the back of the nearly full church. Lucy refocused her lens for a close-up of them. She held her breath and watched for that perfect moment. There it was. Blanche laid her head on her husband’s shoulder. They held the same candle. Even if the church hadn’t run short of them, Lucy was pretty sure they would still be sharing the same light. It was just the way they did things. Then Blanche tilted her chin up toward her husband just as he gave her a winning smile. The candle flashlight tipped to the side, washing them in a glow. That was Lucy’s shot.

“I’m hungry!” she heard the soft whine of a child’s voice. There a few pews down was the Humphrey family. The girls wore matching black velvet jackets over red dresses. The middle-school boy wore blue jeans and a button-down shirt. Altogether, they were a fine looking family. Everyone, except their youngest daughter, was smiling toward the front where the choir sang. She had a big pout on her face. Her eyes were glassy with tears. Lucy took that picture.

Lucy turned the lens of her camera as she moved throughout the congregation, taking snapshots of various people, always searching for that interesting one. A quick glance that only lasted for a brief moment, one that nobody else saw. She saw that on Tina’s face as she sat with her parents, looking up at the cross. Then Lucy took several shots of the closed door. No, Joe wasn’t coming. He had left Turtle Creek forever. And in his wake she had a big mess to clean up.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Nineteen

December 25

Lucy wrapped the pillow around her head to drown out the voice of her dad downstairs singing Hark the Herald Angels Sing . He loved all Christmas music but that one in particular was his favorite. It had his name in it so he felt the song belonged to him.

Even though it was Christmas morning, Lucy didn’t care. It was just way too early to get out of bed, no matter what day it was, especially since her family remained at church the night before until almost midnight. Once they returned home, they opened presents so it seemed she had only been asleep a few hours when her father cranked up the old stereo in the living room where the tunes were playing now.

“Wakie, wakie! Eggs and bakie!” Harold hollered up the stairs.

Like a good daughter, Lucy put on her robe and sleepily bumped into Mike in the hallway as he came out of his room. Through bloodshot eyes, he asked, “When will Dad ever stop doing this so early?”

“Never.” Lucy yawned. “Our only hope is moving out.”

“Now I know another New Year’s Resolution to make.”

They came down the steps and into the kitchen where a large breakfast waited for them, all laid out on the table.

“Merry Christmas!” Margaret sang out. “Grab a plate and help yourselves.”

“Mmmm, it all looks delicious, Mom.” Lucy gave her a kiss and then hugged her dad. “Merry Christmas to everyone!”

Mike slid into a chair at the table, staring down at the cup of coffee Margaret had just placed in front of him. “I’ll eat in a minute. Still waking up.” His yawn was long and loud.

“Hurry and eat. Santa left a few extra gifts beneath the tree while we were all sleeping,” Margaret continued.

“Really?” Lucy perked up. “We get to open more gifts today?”

“Really,” Harold answered. “You know your mom is never done shopping for Christmas.”

“It’s Santa,” Margaret emphasized. “Santa is never done with his shopping. And if the truth were known, I have no idea what is even in the boxes. I found them stuck way back in my closet when I was cleaning it out. You know how I hide presents throughout the year. I haven’t a clue how long they’ve even been back there. Thankfully, the names were on the packages. It will be kind-of fun to see what’s inside, don’t you think?”

“I, for one, cannot wait!” Lucy clapped her hands.

After breakfast, they sat on the floor around the tree. Mike and Lucy took turns opening the gifts. Lucy peeled off the reindeer wrapping paper. Inside was a gold locket with her name engraved on the front. “This is beautiful.”

“Now I remember,” Margaret sighed with happiness. “That’s what I bought for you when you were in eighth grade.”

“That was twelve years ago.” Lucy looked wistfully at the locket in her hand. “I am kinda glad you forgot about it until now. I think this means more to me today.”

“How sweet of you to say, honey.”

“My turn. All eyes on me, please.” Mike tore off his elves wrapping paper. “Wow, oh boy, I always wanted a model airplane! So this was going to be a gift when I was eleven, huh?”

“We can still build it together, son,” Harold said.

Lucy opened the next gift that had her name on it. “This is like a time machine. What else did I want for Christmas long ago?” she asked herself aloud as she opened the box. “A pink angora sweater! Do you think it will still fit?” Lucy hoped, holding it over her bathrobe.

Mike had already torn open his next present. “Wow, baseball cards! I bet some of these are worth some money by now.” Then he looked up sheepishly. “Not that I am going to sell them or anything.”

“Hey, I still see something way back there under the tree,” Lucy said reaching under. “Something else you forgot about Mom…er, I mean Santa!”

Margaret looked oddly at the two gifts. “No, there were only four gifts I found in the closet. I am not sure where those came from.” Margaret read the tag and then smiled. “Joe…they’re from Joe. How sweet. One has my name on it and this one is for you, Lucy.” Margaret passed her the box.

“Joe didn’t leave a present for me?” Mike looked almost hurt.

“Yea, strange, isn’t it,” Lucy panned. “And you were so nice to him when he was here, too. Check your stocking for the coal.”

“I liked Joe. It’s too bad things didn’t work out for him here.” Harold looked a bit glum.

Margaret took an ornament from the box. She laughed. “Isn’t this a cute one?” She held up the Mr. and Mrs. Santa Claus ornament. “And it was made in Germany, too. This goes perfectly with the other ornaments on the tree.” Margaret got to her feet and looked for a spot to hang it. She decided on a place near the top in the front.

“Do you remember the first day Joe walked into the office?” Harold was reminiscing.

“Yes, Dad, we all do. It wasn’t quite a month ago.” Lucy rolled her eyes.

“He was such a nice young man. Kept that apartment nice and tidy,” Margaret said smiling at Joe’s present.

“I remember how he used to sit in his chair and write up those great editorials,” Harold said with a sigh.

“What did he buy you?” Margaret asked Lucy.

Lucy had planned to unwrap the gift in the privacy of her bedroom but the anxious looks of her family forced her to open it here. Lucy removed the ribbon and the paper. She opened the lid and reached inside. On top was a note. It read, 1930 USSR hand-blown glass ornament. The moon shines at night. Lucy took out the glass moon ornament. The moon had little craters. One side of the moon was painted silver and the other side was dark. It was quite fragile. Memories of Joe dancing her around the Cotton Candy House came flooding back. The memory was fresh and too painful.

“Here, Mom, you can put it on the tree for me.” Lucy got to her feet and ran up the stairs to her bedroom.

****

December 27

Lucy couldn’t do the copy for this particular edition of the newspaper. Joe’s last editorial would be in it, proving too painful to read so Mike took over. Yep, he was good in a pinch and Lucy was grateful. Monica was working alongside him on this issue so Lucy took over the main desk.

What a numbskull she was to have fallen so fast and hard for a man who wasn’t what he seemed to be. Lucy had given her trust to him. Next time someone would have to earn it. If there is a next time . Her track record with men was appalling.

If things went according to her calculations, Lucy figured the newspaper had one more year to pump up sales. Oliver and Duckworth could and would wait them out. She’d do everything within her power to keep her family business afloat, but if it wasn’t enough, they would be closing their doors. Statistics from similar situations gave them about a year. Lucy wasn’t sure what her plans would be after that. Maybe John’s offer to work for him would still be possible.

As she doodled on a piece of paper, lost in her thoughts, a man walked in making the bell over the door jingle. Lucy looked up.

He looks familiar . She did a double take; it was Ryan Oliver. Her competition and enemy just walked into her territory. How dare he . He was the root of everything that was wrong with her life. Joe was gone and soon her family’s livelihood would be as well. Lucy stood and went to the counter. Without smiling, she asked, “How may I help you, Mr. Oliver?”

“Ah,” he nodded his head. “You know who I am.”

“How may I help you?”

Oliver looked a bit put-off over her attitude. “Is Joe McNamara here? I need to speak with him.”

“Oh, you don’t know?” Lucy put her hand on her hip.

“Know what?”

“Your man has gone back to Chicago. I am sure he left his forwarding information with you,” Lucy snipped. She wished Mike would come out of his office and see this man standing here. Surely there would be plenty of fireworks.

“You seem to be taking your bad morning out on me. Is there something wrong?”

“Where do I begin? You put Joe in here as your spy. Being a psychiatrist, he was the perfect instrument to ferret out our weakness and then report back to you,” Lucy snipped.

“Is that what Joe told you?” Oliver scratched his head.

“He didn’t have to since it became transparent when I saw you and your partner having lunch with him and toasting your new deal.”

“When was this?” he acted sincerely confused.

“At Clear Water in Williams Bay. Everything suddenly made sense to me—Joe applying to be our editor, his secret meetings...” She shook her head as she tried to control her emotions. “What hurts most of all is buying up land so you could build here and put us out of business.”

“We bought land to build but now it’s up for sale again.”

Lucy’s head snapped back to look him straight on because she had to have heard wrong. “What do you mean?”

“It’s true I met with Joe on several occasions, but he is the one who contacted us.”

“Joe made the initial contact?” This was so much worse than she’d imagined.

“Weeks back Joe came to our office to talk to us about the newspaper we planned on building here. He told us it wasn’t a good idea to do so.”

“Joe said that?” Lucy felt as if someone had taken all of the air out of the room as she sat down on the tall stool, afraid her legs wouldn’t support her.

“He pointed out that there were already too many newspapers in this one southern lakes region and we’d be competing with folks who already had an established relationship with newspapers who have been here for generations. Once I ran the demographics, I had to agree with him. Change doesn’t bode well in such an area. Joe went on to say that trying to start a new business here wouldn’t do us any favors. People tend to draw lines.”

“That’s true.” Lucy nodded her head as her mind went numb with surprise over this news.

“He suggested we relocate our newspaper venture to a different section of the state. Joe even studied the entire state, finding where all the small newspapers were located and then found us a beautiful spot about three hundred miles from here that was perfect for us. We’re leaving town today as soon as we sign-off on putting the land back up for sale with a realtor. To answer your earlier question, no, Joe didn’t leave his forwarding address with me. You see, he told me he had planned on making Turtle Creek his permanent home. I only came to say goodbye to him and shake his hand.”

Lucy watched the back of Ryan Oliver leave her office. She looked over at Ulilla who was shaking her head.

“You sure blew it with Joe,” she tsked.

Lucy raced into the private office. “Mike! I’ve made a terrible mistake!”

“What?” he asked looking down at the copy. “This looks perfect to me.”

“That’s not what I’m talking about.” Lucy leaned over the desk. “I was wrong about Joe. He wasn’t meeting with those fellows at the other paper to do us in. He found them another location to build that is over three hundred miles away!”

“Well, I’ll be.” Mike grinned and slapped his knee. “I never would have thought that!”

“Ah-oh, Lucy, you did something really bad by letting him go,” Monica said shaking her head.

“We have got to get Joe back, but I can’t do it. Mike, you have to go after Joe. Promise him anything if he will come back. Tell him I’ve been fired if you have to.”

“No good, sis; I can’t do it.”

“Why not?”

Ulilla walked into the room. “No one can fix your mistake but you, Lucy. You blew it. You fix it.”

“I can’t,” she answered helplessly as she slid down the wall to the floor. If only she could curl into a little ball. “I didn’t believe in him. He won’t forgive that. He probably hates me too much by now.”

“There’s also the Angela element standing in your way, don’t you agree?” Monica reminded her. “By now, she probably has her claws back in him. All three inches of them.”

****

December 28

Lucy sat at her desk typing out the new ad for the employment section.

Wanted: Editor for local paper. Must possess the gift for words, the ability for expressing oneself that will make people want to read more. Please apply in person.

Ullila nudged her. “Have you read Joe’s last editorial.”

“Can’t say that I have.” Lucy looked at Ulilla.

“You know, you are holding onto an attitude you have no right to own.”

Lucy stopped typing and looked at Ulilla.

Ulilla continued, “You need to read this.” She dropped the paper, opened to the editorial section, on Lucy’s desk. Lucy read the title, Saying Goodbye . She held it out to Ulilla who was sitting back at her desk. “I’ve already read it.”

“Not this one.” Ulilla shook her head emphatically.

Lucy scowled at Ulilla over her persistence. Then she looked down at the paper. She began to read out loud.

Saying Goodbye

by Joseph McNamara

What will I ever do without Lucy Collins? Ever since that first day when I stumbled into The Turtle Creek Newspaper and took the job of editor, I have never been the same. From the first moment, I saw her some emotion began to wake up inside of me. It was like mapping an unknown land, and each turn led me further away from all that I knew. Ever since that day, I’ve been a mess.

The big newspapers serve a purpose, sure, but they don't contain the atmosphere and warmth that emulates from the owners of The Turtle Creek Newspaper. From that first day, they welcomed me as their family. Mr. and Mrs. Harold Collins, along with Lucy and Mike, always greet me, and everyone, with a genuine smile. They noticed me. Me.

The Turtle Creek Newspaper is where I first met Lucy and wrote my first editorial. That night, I decorated a Christmas tree with the family. How can I forget the protective nature of Mike Collins who immediately knew I wasn’t what I seemed to be?

I’ve had a nicer time in their living room than any place else on this earth. Since meeting this family, I have lived a different life. Cried countless tears. And have laughed out loud so often, and so hard, that my stomach still aches from the memories alone.

How does one say good-bye to such a place?

With my last editorial.

I walked into the newspaper a few weeks ago. It’s located on the corner of Wisconsin and Walworth Avenue. It’s so far off the beaten path that residents twenty miles away do not even know it’s there. It’s like the Gene Kelly movie Brigadoon. I sit in the back of the office, where the light is bad but the view is perfect. I try to imagine the other generations of the Collins family having lived, loved and worked here. I feel I know them. They are in the woodwork, in the chair where I sit, and at times, I think, I can even hear them speak to me.

The office is always really busy with dear Ulilla Langston who writes the social column, Carol in advertising, Abe who makes us clean-up after ourselves, Harold who keeps us on task, and his wife, darling Margaret. For a brief moment I was a part of all this.

The paper is a stabilizing source in the community. A twenty-year-old housewife said she found her children’s bedroom furniture advertised in the paper. A forty-year-old truck driver said his first job was delivering the Turtle Creek paper as a boy.

But for me, it was Lucy Collins who made the difference. Not only is she a gifted professional photographer, but she’s also the love of my life. For that fact alone, I can never really say goodbye to her. I won’t even try. Instead I will say, see you in my dreams, Lucy.

Lucy hugged the article to her. “You’re right, Ulilla. This is so beautiful and different from the first one Joe wrote. This one is just for me. Maybe I do still have a chance with Joe. I can only hope that it’s true. Thanks for insisting I read it.”

“One would think by now that you would be fully aware of my sound advice.” Ulilla bristled. “That’s what I loved most about Joe. He recognizes talent and encourages people to just go for it!”

“That’s very true.” Lucy admitted. She thought of the numerous times he complimented her photography.

“Joe recognized my talent when he was here and suggested I not only have the society column but add another column to my resume.”

“And what would that be?” Lucy asked.

“It’s something I need to discuss with your dad when he gets back at the first of the year. Joe feels we need an advice columnist too and says I would be perfect for it,” Ulilla gushed.

“Oh, like a ‘Dear Abby’ column?”

“Yes, but this one would be called Darling Ulilla!”

“Okay, Darling Ulilla, here is your first bit of advice to give. What should I do about Joe?”

“You already know what you should do. No sense in asking me, is there?”

“You’re right.” Lucy drummed her short fingernails on the desk. She looked at the phone. Her first choice was to call Joe. It was faster but also the cowardly way out. She needed to see him face-to-face, toe-to-toe in order to apologize. If God answered her prayer, maybe Joe would forgive her and return to Turtle Creek with her. She had to at least try.

“I’ve made an awful mistake,” Lucy’s voice quivered.

“You sure have,” Ulilla answered. “Love can be problematical. If you wait to figure it all out first, you will be older, like I am, when you finally realize it’s best to just embrace love and figure things out along the way.”

“I don’t know where to find him.” Lucy fought back her tears.

“I do. He didn’t leave his forwarding address with those two newspaper fellows, but he did leave it with me.” Ulilla smiled proudly as she opened her desk drawer and took out a paper with his address and phone number.

“When did you get this?”

“Joe gave it to me at the same time he dropped off the referral for me to see a specialist about my knees. He is setting up the whole shebang for me.”

“Wow, that was really nice of him.”

“He’s the best!” Ulilla hummed.

Lucy put the information into a map program on her computer to get the driving directions. She read the turn-by-turn directions and was horrified to see that Joe’s address was in the heart of Chicago. She was used to country roads using signposts as her guide. These directions would take her down cement streets that were filled with fast moving traffic and one-way streets. Now she was about to tread into new territory that was confusing to her but made perfect sense to Joe. Well, if Joe could master country roads, she would give his city driving a whirl. She imagined she might get run over trying.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Twenty

December 29

She was determined to get a good night’s sleep so she could get an early start the next morning. Lucy wanted to be in Chicago before rush hour even started. However, her night was a restless one. She turned over. And over again. The moon was out and Dancin’ in The Moonlight played in her brain. Then she flipped back in the other direction. She stared at the face of the alarm clock. The arms didn’t seem to move. Okay, they did move but slowly. Golly the ticking of it was sure loud. It needed to be replaced. Lucy laid flat on her back thinking about the words she would say to Joe when she saw him. At dawn, she dragged herself out of bed even though the sky still looked like the pitch of midnight.

Lucy had her clothes laid out from the night before. A pair of new jeans and her pink sweater seemed to be a good choice. The sweater fit her small frame. She could still wear the same clothes she did in middle-school. Who knew? She must be nervous because even her thoughts were rambling and there was no time to waste thinking about clothes. Not that what she wore really mattered. What she said to Joe today mattered. She still wasn’t sure what that would be. And now her mind was numb from lack of sleep.

Downstairs her mother was already in the kitchen. It was unusual for her to be up this early but Lucy chalked it up to a restless night for her, too.

“Here, I made breakfast for you. You can’t drive to Chicago on an empty stomach.” Margaret placed the plate of bacon and eggs on the table for Lucy. “Want some hot chocolate?”

“Actually, Mom, I don’t want anything at all. My stomach is queasy with nerves as it is. I just want to get going.” Lucy grabbed her coat and headed for the door.

“Sit, sit.” Margaret pointed to the chair and pulled the coat out of Lucy’s arms. “Eat a piece of bacon.”

A chaotic mix of hope, worry and doubt churned Lucy’s insides to such a degree that she could not eat anything but she took a piece to appease her mother. “I’ll just eat this since it’s what I need, protein. Love you.” She gave her mother a tight hug as she pulled back her coat. “Say a prayer for me today.”

“I have been praying all night long. Everyone down at the newspaper is praying for you, too.” Margaret called, as Lucy headed out the door.

“That’s good to know. With a miracle from God, I’ll be driving home with Joe’s vehicle in my rearview mirror.”

“That would make us all happy. I’ll put fresh sheets on his old bed and hang a clean towel on the bathroom rack, just in case.”

“I’ll tell Joe just that.” Lucy went out the door and hopped over little mounds of snow along the way. She knew her mother was standing at the kitchen window watching as she scraped the ice from her car’s windows. It took Lucy a full minute to get the near frozen door open. As she headed out the drive, she tooted her horn to her mother.

When Lucy left Turtle Creek, it was all of twelve degrees and blustery, too. She drove through sleet. The early morning shadows combined with frigid temperatures forced Lucy to be extra careful on the winding country roads. She passed a closed service station and was pleased she had a full tank of gas. She hoped that once she reached the Interstate the driving would become easier due to the traffic and snowplows. But it wasn’t to be.

The dirty snow along the Interstate was unlike the pure billowy snow along the country roads. A few times her car fishtailed over patches of ice. Each time she let her foot off the gas and steered in the direction her car was sliding. In seconds, she had the car under control—until the next time. The road conditions forced her to drive well below the speed limit, which produced long blasts of car horns and inappropriate waves from fellow travelers.

On the two and a half hour drive to the city, Lucy kept replaying the past month in her mind. Why hadn’t she just gone with her faith and what her heart was telling her? If she had, there might have been a happy ending for her. Chances of that happening looked as bleak as the weather right about now.

A thousand words of explanation passed through her mind, wondering which one would be the key to unlock Joe’s heart and grant forgiveness. Even if he did forgive her, it didn’t mean he would automatically come back to her or work at the newspaper again. Joe had been a gift to them all and she let it fall between her fingers.

Feeling more and more upset, Lucy almost missed her turn. At the last minute, she was able to make her exit by cutting off another motorist. “Sorry!” she waved to the man.

Minutes later, she was driving through downtown Chicago and over the Illinois Bridge, streaming right along with the traffic as though she belonged here. Lucy looked at the skyscrapers that shot up from the cement. There were so many people jammed into one spot. It was another world here with the sky nearly obliterated with structures built of concrete and glass. It looked nothing like her world. But this was Joe’s world.

The noise level hurt her head and it seemed everyone had their own system of driving, none of which she considered safe. No one let her slow down so she could read street signs. Finally, she gave up and found a public parking lot. Right now from what she just experienced, she felt it was safer on foot. Lucy found the parking attendant and showed him the address.

“Can you tell me where I can find this?” Lucy pointed at the paper.

“I sure can,” he pointed across the street. “It’s that building right there.”

“God sent me to just the right spot to park my car!” Lucy felt like jumping into the air and clicking her heels together.

“I guess He did just that.” The man agreed and then turned to help another customer.

This was just the encouragement Lucy needed. Her spirit welled with faith over having stumbled upon the building. God knew where it was and directed her right to this place. Of all the buildings and of all the parking lots in the entire city of Chicago, God had led her to this spot.

Maybe this was an omen that Joe would understand and forgive her. Best case scenario, at this time tomorrow, they’d be back in Turtle Creek, kissing under the mistletoe. The worst-case scenario was too horrid to consider so she pushed it from her mind.

Lucy stood right in front of the building on the same side of the street and looked up. Her happy ending was only yards away. She crumpled up the paper with the driving instructions and shoved it into her coat pocket. Lucy pushed through the heavy front doors to a marble foyer awash in people who knew where they were going. Lucy knew where she was going, too. She was going to Joe.

Lucy followed the flow and ended up by the elevators. A large placard encased with glass held the names of the offices and floor numbers. Joe’s office was on the sixth floor. When those around her stepped into the elevator, she walked with them as though this was no big deal. She couldn’t stop staring at the hairstyles and the beautiful coats of cashmere and the furs many women wore. Lucy looked down at her cloth coat. It was the best she owned, and although she was far from poor, she was as far from city style as she could get. Lucy imagined these people probably all lived in lofts and penthouses and townhouses. Not one of them would consider a Cotton Candy house for a residence. This was Joe’s world. Being here in the city she realized this world didn’t include her. She didn’t fit in here. Confidence began to dwindle as she stepped out of the elevator.

A woman dressed in a red suit with a wide collar sat behind a desk in the middle of the reception area. Her blonde hair looked like spun silk and she had so much makeup on that Lucy couldn’t help but wonder how she would look with a fresh scrubbed face.

“May I help you, please?” the receptionist asked through full lips of berry red lipstick. Her nameplate read Phyllis Morris.

“I’m here to see Joe McNamara, Ms. Morris.”

“Your name, please?” she looked at Lucy through heavy eyelashes.

“Lucy.”

“Lucy who?”

“Just tell him Lucy, he knows who I am.”

“Be that as it may,” Phyllis ruffled, “that is not how we operate here. I need a first and last name.”

“Very well.” Lucy tried acting sophisticated. “Then inform him Lucy Collins is here to see him. It’s extremely important I see him right away; I’ve been on the road for hours.”

“Are you a new patient?” She tapped the information into her computer.

“Isn’t that privileged information?” Lucy didn’t want to give away more than she needed to. She liked the idea of catching Joe by surprise.

“Just take a seat.”

“You don’t understand. I do not want to take a seat. I need to see him right away.” Lucy had to see him now. She couldn’t wait another moment.

“Yes, you already told me that. Patience. Please take a seat.” She pointed to a line of chairs. “I must warn you; he’s in a conference so he may be a while. Maybe you want to go to the Starbucks down on the first floor for a latte and come back later.”

Latte? The last thing she wanted was a latte. “No, I’ll wait.” Agitated, she looked around and took a seat by the windows. There were plenty of magazines on the coffee table, so Lucy began to work her way through them. An hour later, the receptionist still hadn’t called her name.

Lucy set the magazines aside, tired of reading about beauty tips. “Excuse me.” Lucy walked toward the desk pulling a strand of hair off her sleeve. “Ms. Morris…does Dr. McNamara even know I am here?”

“I informed his secretary. She will inform him when his meeting has ended.”

“Okay,” she said with a heavy sigh. “Would you mind pointing me to the nearest restroom?”

Lucy was directed down the hall. Feeling grubby from her long drive, Lucy splashed cold water on her face. She didn’t expect the paper towels to be so soft which added another layer of elegance to this chic office.

Lucy dug through her purse for makeup. She applied a bit of powder and some lip-gloss. She wished she had brought along Monica’s arsenal of cosmetics so she could apply a layer of it and at least look as though she fit in here. If she had to do it over again, her wardrobe choice of the day would have been a dress. Lucy took the brush from her purse and fluffed her curls. Then she looked again in the mirror. She stood out like a sore thumb. A very sore thumb.

Just as she headed back toward the reception area, she heard someone say Joe’s name. She looked around. Phyllis Morris wasn’t watching her area. Instead she was gossiping with another woman and her back was turned. Lucy smiled. She never thought she would be grateful for gossip.

It was time to find Joe for herself. She turned in the opposite direction and went down a corridor. Soon it opened up to a large space that was divided up into smaller units where employees worked. Along the outside walls were private offices with two walls of glass—one that looked into the offices and the other that looked out into the city.

There at the corner of the room she saw Joe. Her heart raced. She waved wildly at him but he didn’t notice. Joe walked into an office and closed the door. Not to be discouraged, Lucy walked up to the door and read the name, Dr. Joseph McNamara. She peeked through the partly open blinds. It was, as she had feared. Joe wasn’t alone.

Lucy waited tapping her shoe on the carpet while wondering what she should do. There was a lot of giggling going on in there so she assumed it wasn’t a patient he was seeing. What she could see were long legs and a short skirt to show them off. Lucy looked down at her pants and boots with salt stains along the edges.

Then the door opened by several inches and remained so, as though someone were deciding if they should stay or leave. Lucy held a deep breath as she stepped further back into the corner, hoping to go unnoticed.

“And I love you, too. I want to be your partner professionally and personally.” Angela walked out of the office, and just as she closed the door, she noticed Lucy standing a few feet away from Joe’s office.

“Oh, my gosh!” Angela nervously looked around. She took a hold of Lucy’s elbow and escorted her into another office. Once they were both inside, Angela shut the door and locked it. Then she pulled the blinds so no one could see in. “Well, well, if it isn’t Lucy Collins from Turtle Crap, Wisconsin.”

“It’s Turtle Creek.”

“Just what are you doing here?” she rashly asked with her hands on her hips.

“I am here to see Joe…” Lucy’s voice was quiet but strong. Slowly she rubbed her palms on the sides of her slacks. Lucy watched Angela pace back and forth on the carpet.

“Does he know you’re here?” Angela pivoted on her heels and then came to a stop directly in front of Lucy.

“I’m not sure. The receptionist said he was in a meeting…”

Angela’s sneer broadened. “The meeting Joe had was with me. It started last night and ended this morning if you know what I mean.” Angela laughed seductively. “We told everyone not to disturb us. So, in all truthfulness, he may not really be avoiding you after all. He just may not have been told yet.”

The woman’s words hurt Lucy. Thinking about Joe in someone’s arms other than hers was hard enough but imagining him with someone like Angela was more than she could handle. Lucy sat down on the white leather couch, not sure what to do next.

Angela depressed a button on her phone.

“Yes, Doctor Steel?” her secretary answered.

“Please do not tell Doctor McNamara about Lucy Collins being here. I am taking care of this matter myself. He has a lot to take care of before the end of the day. He cannot be disturbed.”

“Yes, Doctor Steel,” came the answer.

Angela turned her attention back to Lucy. “You can save yourself a boatload of humiliation if you just sail on out of here right now. Listen, for some reason, I really like you and feel sorry for you. I can help you keep some personal pride.”

Lucy raised an eyebrow. “You’re afraid of something, Angela. Could it be you think maybe Joe would want to hear what I have to say to him?”

“I don’t mean to hurt you, but it’s best you’re told the truth.” Angela sat down beside Lucy. With a voice seemingly filled with concern, she continued, “Joe told me everything that happened between the two of you back in Turtle Crap.”

“The name is Turtle Creek!”

“Whatever.” She shrugged. “But he has had enough of small town USA and doesn’t want to see you ever again. I know it hurts but I believe in telling the truth, don’t you?” Angela fidgeted with her high heels by taking them off at the heels and then sliding them back on again.

“I would rather he tell me that himself.” Lucy held Angela’s gaze.

“All right, go ahead and humiliate yourself. But remember that I warned you.” Angela put her feet all the way back into her heels, rose and pointed toward the door.

Lucy got up and walked to the door. She stood there looking at it for a moment wondering if Angela was telling the truth or bluffing. There was only one way to be really sure. Lucy started to open the door.

“There’s one more thing you should know,” Angela walked up behind her.

“And what is that?”

“Turn around.” Angela held up her left hand and waggled her fingers in Lucy’s face. A huge, diamond ring adorned one of the fingers. “We got engaged a few days ago. That’s okay; I don’t really expect congratulations from you.”

Lucy blanched. She felt she was spiraling downward. Lucy walked out of Angela’s office and down the hall to Joe’s door. She held up her hand to knock but then stopped within inches of tapping. Who was she kidding? Joe was going to marry Angela. He was a psychiatrist marrying another psychiatrist. This was their office. Turtle Creek couldn’t compete with all of this, and she could never compete with Angela. Lucy looked back at Angela who had a smug expression on her face.

Angela was right. It was best to leave while she still had a modicum of pride left. Lucy walked on past Angela and to the receptionist desk. “I decided not to see Doctor McNamara and I would appreciate it if you didn’t even tell him I was here.” Before the woman could respond, Lucy was standing at the elevators, pressing the down button.

It was hard holding herself together when all she wanted to do was shed tears, but she wouldn’t give anyone here the satisfaction of seeing her upset. Lucy tapped her foot counting the seconds, waiting for the elevator to come and swallow her up. Meanwhile she willed herself to remain calm, giving herself permission to cry as soon as she was alone where no one would see her. But the tears began to roll down her face nonetheless and her hands shook as she wiped her cheeks.

“Hello, Doctor McNamara.” Phyllis greeted him from her desk.

“Phyllis, I am expecting a new patient this afternoon.”

Chills of dread ran over Lucy’s arms. Lucy was too frightened to move. She kept her back to the reception area wondering where she could run since the elevator wasn’t arriving.

Only hours ago, she would have done nearly anything to see Joe but now she had completely changed her mind. Joe was with Angela. Lucy would only appear as the pathetic person she was, chasing Joe to Chicago. If he had really been interested in her, then he would have at least stayed long enough to explain the situation to her. Or he could have tried calling her. But he didn’t do any of that. Instead he packed up and left.

“I’m on my way out right now. Please tell my new patient that Doctor Steel…”

There was an EXIT sign only feet away. Lucy pushed through the door and down the six flights of stairs. Her feet made hollow echoing sounds as she went. In the lobby, she nearly sprinted toward the front doors, keeping her eye on them as the prize. The blast of frigid air felt good on her face which was still hot with humiliation. Lucy crossed the street, got in her car, paid her ticket and drove out of the city.

****

Joe sat in his office chair for the last time. The final resignation papers had been drawn up and now were on the desk in front of him. Once he signed his name there would be no more going back, no changing of his mind. He remembered his last meeting with the Board of Directors. The Board, along with Angela, did their best to talk Joe into taking the partnership that was still on the table, but no one gave as good an argument as Angela.

“You have trained long and hard for this position. Joe, you earned it. No one has your background or skill. You come highly recommended by the entire Board of Doctors from the hospital where you served,” she pointed out. “We are offering you the top-of-the-line insurance package. Also a 401k and one hundred percent total investment with stock options. You can name your own salary and take as many vacation days per year as you need. Not only will you have the company car of your choice but we will also pay for half your daily living expenses.”

Joe shook his head, overwhelmed with the offer staring him in the face. “You are all generous, but you keep missing the point. I am not holding out for anything else. I simply no longer want to be a psychiatric specialist.”

“How can you say that?” Angela asked. Her mouth was dry making her voice stop in her throat.

“What do you want?” the President of the Board asked.

“I wish I knew. At this point in my life, I only know what I do not want. I do not want to continue with my profession,” Joe said.

So much had changed in his life since he made that statement a month earlier. A lifetime had been lived. Joe now knew what he wanted to do with the rest of his life. It was time to get to it. He picked up a pen and wrote his full name on the bottom line.

There was a soft knock on the office door. Angela walked in. Joe looked up and smiled as he slid the papers into the envelope. “So you have come to say goodbye?”

“No. I have come to talk you into tearing up those papers you just signed.”

“What do you want me to say that hasn’t already been said?” Joe asked.

“When I tell you I love you, I want you to tell me you love me, too.” Angela opened the door, “I want to be your partner professionally and personally.”

Joe shook his head as he shot her a stern look. Angela left, closing the door quietly behind her. Joe grabbed his coat and was heading out when his secretary buzzed his office. “Yes..?”

“There is a bit of paperwork we need for you to complete so we can process your documentation and clear the company of your services. I’ll bring it in now if that is all right.”

“Thanks.” Joe sat at this desk filling out forms and signing his name on each paper. Then he stacked it together and hand carried it to his secretary.

“We are going to miss you around here,” she told him.

Joe smiled and headed toward the front.

“Hello Doctor McNamara.” Phyllis greeted him from her desk.

“Phyllis, I am expecting a new patient this afternoon, but I’m on my way out right now. Please tell my new patient that Doctor Steel is taking over my caseload.”

“Then this is really goodbye?”

“Yes, this is really goodbye.”

“I wish you well, Doctor.” Phyllis held her hand out to Joe. “And where are you going now?”

“Right now, I am on my way to church. After that I am going home.”

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Twenty-One

January 2

Lucy sat in the break room waiting for everyone to assemble for their first meal together of the New Year. There was a special breakfast to welcome everyone back to work. Lucy knew she was blessed to be surrounded by people who cared about her and their job. If she learned anything from the past few days, it was to appreciate what she had today.

“Happy New Year!” were the first words out of their mouths when they walked in.

The small group of employees filled up on sausage rolls and breakfast burritos while washing it down with coffee and orange juice. They began sharing their stories of how they celebrated New Year’s Eve.

None were as happy as Ulilla as she showed off the new engagement ring—compliments of Abe. “I never thought the day would ever come when I would be an engaged woman. You should have seen how cute Abe was when he got down on his knee…”

“The good knee,” Abe emphasized.

When the laughter died down, Ulilla continued, “He read a poem to me by Emily Dickenson. You are the limit of my dream, the focus of my prayer. ”

“How very romantic!” Monica cooed looking at Mike.

“And then he held out the box.” Ulilla re-enacted the moment by playing both the parts.

“Did you say ‘yes’ right away?” Carol asked Ulilla.

“Ulilla didn’t say anything,” Abe told them. “She just squealed and grabbed the box out of my hand. When she saw the diamond, she squealed again. My ears are still ringing.” He pulled at his ear lobe. “But I am taking that for a yes.”

Everyone took turns hugging Ulilla and gushing over her diamond engagement ring. As an after thought, they congratulated and hugged Abe.

“For Christmas, you said you wanted a Caribbean cruise. Did you find the tickets under your Christmas tree, too, Ulilla?” Margaret asked.

“No, I didn’t find them under my tree, but Abe found them under his.” Ulilla blushed as if she were a young woman finding her first love.

“That’ll make for a lovely honeymoon,” Margaret said.

“What did you do for New Year’s Eve?” Carol turned toward Lucy with the question.

Sitting around watching TV wasn’t worth the mention so Lucy did what she was good at—changing the subject. “Instead of rehashing old news, how about if we go around the room and name our New Year’s Resolution?”

“Great idea!” Mike cheered holding up a cup of orange juice. “My resolution is to spend more time with Monica.”

“And my resolution is to make sure Mike carries out his resolution!” Monica laughed nudging him playfully in the side.

“My turn, my turn,” Ulilla let them all know. She stuffed a sausage roll in her mouth, licked her fingers and stated, “My resolution is to lose a few pounds before the wedding.”

“Your turn now, Dad. What is your news?” Mike goaded.

“Thank you, son. This is a wonderful day of happiness,” Harold stepped forward. “I have more celebratory news. You have all done a fabulous job here at the paper in the past month. Sales are up, advertising has peaked and all this happened while I was out of the office.”

“Not entirely,” Monica interjected. “You did nap here.”

“Harold!” Margaret exclaimed, “So that is where you went when you disappeared on me.”

“Well, I am not disappearing on you anymore, my love. I decided this newspaper could manage just fine without me. I am ready to step down.”

The room collectively gasped over the news.

“Dad, are you all right?” Lucy panicked remembering his heart condition.

“I’m just fine, sweetie, no need to worry.” Harold tweaked her cheek.

“Well, Dad, you did it again,” Lucy declared standing to her feet. She set her cup down on the table. “You have a way of making everyone speechless.” Lucy was just as surprised by her dad’s news as everyone else in the room. Except for maybe Mike. He didn’t look surprised at all which meant he already knew about this decision. An uneasy feeling encircled her.

“If you are stepping down, who is taking your place?” Carol wanted to know.

“Of all the decisions I’ve made in my life, this has been the easiest one for me to make. I am really pleased to hand the newspaper to one of my own children. As my great granddad handed it down to my dad and as my dad handed this establishment down to me, I now very proudly hand this paper to my son, Mike.”

By the looks on everyone’s face, Lucy wasn’t the only one surprised by the announcement. The applause started out as weak but then picked up momentum as Lucy leapt to her feet and clapped loudest of all.

“What about Lucy?” Carol fretted. “She has worked tirelessly coming up with new ideas and strategies to keep the newspaper running.”

“Lucy knows I am proud of her.” Harold looked at her as she struggled to keep her emotions under control. “Don’t you?”

“Of course I do.” Lucy tried to cover up her disappointment with a smile. Her lips began to quiver. She dug her fingernails into her hands willing herself not to cry. All she could hear were her grandfather’s words rolling over and over again in her head, “Someday I want you to run this business. It’s time for a smart female to take over and shake things up!” Obviously, her father felt that the tradition of keeping a male family member at the helm was the way to go.

“Shouldn’t Lucy be co-manager with Mike? If not, then it doesn’t seem quite fair to me,” Ulilla protested.

“It’s all right, Ulilla. I don’t need the responsibility of the newspaper, honestly. Besides it’s not large enough for two managers. I mean, we aren’t talking about the New York Times here.” Lucy forced a laugh.

“I don’t want everyone here to get their feelings hurt for Lucy,” Mike explained. “Sis’ I am going to need you more than ever.”

“You know you can count on me.” Lucy hugged him. She meant the words she said to her brother, knowing he couldn’t run the place without her. Everyone needed her now more than ever. Although she wouldn’t be running the place in name, she would be running it just the same. It would be enough. It would have to be.

“I always have counted on you. Thanks.” Mike then addressed the group. “My dad and I had a long talk over the holidays and I feel honored to stand in his stead as the head of The Turtle Creek Newspaper.”

“What an exciting start to the new year. We have a new manager.” Abe held up his cup. “Here’s to you, Mike!”

Everyone toasted Mike with orange juice and then clapped.

“What is your resolution, Margaret?” Abe asked.

“My resolution is letting Harold take his daily nap here at the office so I can get some work done around the house!” Margaret held up her coffee.

Everyone laughed and nodded their heads, agreeing with one another that would be the case.

“It’s time to toast Mike, new manager of The Turtle Creek Newspaper . May you live long, sleep peacefully, and always be surrounded by people who love you. And someday may you pass the legacy of this business to one of your children.” Lucy raised her cup high before heading to the sink to wash the plates.

“Lucy, that was lovely.” Margaret sidled up beside her daughter and gave her a hug. “I know you hoped the newspaper would go to you. If the truth be known, it should be yours.”

“It’s all right, Mom. I will be right here doing what I always do until Mike gets things under control. After that, maybe it’s time for something new in my life.”

“That gives me an idea!” Standing directly behind her, Ulilla gasped. “Lucy, you should start one of those lovelorn columns like the big newspapers do. You know how they go, ‘beautiful female looking for handsome male.’ You could be its first customer and write up your experiences.”

“I don’t think so.” Lucy protested.

Then Monica said, “Back to New Year’s resolutions. Lucy, what is yours?”

Lucy dried her hands on a towel and then turned to see all the faces in the room looking at her, waiting for her answer. “My resolution is to find a new editor for us. The ad just went out a few days ago.”

The bell over the front door jingled. Monica got up from the table and looked into the office. “Lucy! Your resolution is coming true first.”

“That’s great news!” Lucy squared her shoulders as she walked out. Seeing the man at the counter, she stumbled over her own feet. “What are you doing here?” Lucy grabbed a hold of the back of a chair.

“I have come about the editor position,” Joe answered. “Unless the position has already been filled? If it has, that would really be a shame because I come with top-notch credentials. You can check them out if you’d like.” His smile was infectious. For that moment, she didn’t care if he was betrothed to another woman. All she knew was she loved Joe. All that mattered was Joe was here. Impulsively, Lucy ran across the room and into his arms.

He grabbed a hold of her as though he would never let her go. Joe’s kisses were wild and passionate. And he kept them coming.

“You feel so good.” Joe ran his lips on her throat as she breathed in the scent that was purely Joe. “I have missed you!”

“Wait.” Lucy pressed her fingers to his lips. He bit them playfully and kissed her again.

“Joe.” Lucy wiggled out of his arms. “As glad as I am to see you, I can’t kiss you. Not anymore.”

“What are you talking about?” Joe tried to grab her wrist but Lucy backed away.

Lucy found she wasn’t mad at Joe. She would always love him no matter who he loved. It was then she realized that loving someone meant she accepted them unconditionally. “Why are you really here?”

“I already told you. I’ve come about the ad you placed in the paper.” Joe took out a paper and opened it. He began to read. “ Wanted-Editor who is good with words . I am very good with words, you told me that yourself. Ability to express oneself , do you realize you restated your first qualification? You only needed to pick one of those phrases—not both.” Joe pointed out. He placed the paper on the counter. “It also says to apply in person . Here I am.”

“Joe…”

“Don’t tell me it’s been filled.”

“No, it hasn’t been filled. In fact, you are the first applicant.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

“As happy as I am to see you again, our problem is the chemistry between us. You walked right in here and kissed me.”

“I did. You kissed back, too.” Joe ran his fingers along her jaw line.

“The problem is,” Lucy started again, “that you are an engaged man.”

“Engaged?” Joe shook his head. “Am I missing something here?”

“Don’t pull an innocent act on me. You might as well know. I went to your office just after Christmas to see you. Angela intercepted me in time to show me the engagement ring you gave to her. She also told me about your partnership. So you can stop the charade.”

“You came all the way to Chicago to see me and allowed Angela to stop you?” Joe was irritated. “That doesn’t sound like you.”

“There was no point in seeing you after talking to her. I was humiliated enough as it was.”

Joe stepped toward Lucy and pulled her into him. She struggled to push him away but he locked his arms tightly around her. “Listen to me. From now on, when you need to know something about me, ask me first or our relationship is not going to work, do you hear me?”

Lucy stopped moving and looked into his eyes. “Did you say, ‘our relationship’?”

Joe nodded. “I did.”

“Does this mean you are not really engaged to Angela?” The corners of her mouth curled up.

“That’s quite correct. I also resigned from my private practice. I need a job, Lucy Collins. Are you going to hire me back or what?”

Lucy sighed with relief. He looked so adorable. How easy it would be to kiss and make up, which was what she really wanted to do. “You’ll have to fill out another application. Your information may have changed and we need to keep current.” Lucy walked around the counter and pulled out an application. With a smile she couldn’t hide, she handed him a pen. “I have also started something new here. You will have to sign a two year contract.”

Joe smiled back, taking the application and pen from her before taking a seat. “No problem. I’ll sign anything.”

“It’s nice to know you are a compliant employee. You’ll also have to…”

“Write an editorial, I know. I remember.” He scratched his head above his ear.

“No, I wasn’t going to say that.”

Joe looked hopeful. He set down the application and walked around the counter until he stood face-to-face with her. “You’re too cute.” He pushed the curls falling across her brow behind her ears. “What were you going to say?”

“I was going to tell you that if we decide to hire you, you’ll have to sit at the old desk in the corner where the light is really bad.” Lucy focused on his lips.

Joe smiled. “I’ve already thought about that.” He reached into the box he had brought with him and took out a small lamp. “I brought my own light this time. My own paper, too. Pencils, pens, pencil sharpener. If I have forgotten anything, I’ll go to the store.”

“They’re building an office supply place a few towns away,” Lucy told him moving closer to him.

“Perfect. I imagine the pay for this position is still the same?”

“Yes, and it also still comes with a garage apartment,” she quickly pointed out.

“Then I’ll be able to be close to you.” Joe touched the end of her nose. “I’ve missed that blue towel that hangs on the bathroom rack.”

“It’s missed you, too.” Lucy felt Joe’s breath on her face. She closed her eyes and leaned in for another spectacular kiss. But just as their lips were to meet, they heard laughter. Lucy opened her eyes and turned to see the newspaper staff ogling them.

“Look at you two,” Ulilla sighed. “Add a couple of red sweaters and a cocker spaniel and you have yourself next year’s Christmas card.”

“Come on,” Joe coaxed. “Let’s go somewhere we can talk in private.”

Joe drove them to town in his SUV. When they walked into Ma’s Diner, they sat in the back booth.

“Hot chocolate for two and don’t spare the whipped cream,” Joe happily ordered.

“Joe, I can’t believe you’re back.” Lucy kept blinking her eyes. By now she had smiled so much her jaws were starting to ache.

“Why wouldn’t I come back?”

“For one thing, I accused you of betrayal right in front of everyone.” Lucy’s heart rate increased just thinking about it.

“That you did,” Joe agreed.

“If I had to do it all over again, I would do it much differently.”

“Tell me what that would look like.” He folded his arms on the table.

“I would be cool and professional. Don’t laugh.” Lucy smiled at Joe again. “I would ask you to please step into my office. Behind closed doors…”

“You’d kiss me!”

“Not when I was mad, I wouldn’t.”

“See, there you have gone wrong. If I was called into your office and then you closed the door, I would imagine it was because you wanted to be kissed. So I may not wait for you to kiss me. I would kiss you.”

“You sure are in a happy mood today, aren’t you?” Lucy noted.

The waitress set down their drinks in front of them and Joe took a sip.

“Hot chocolate does it to me every time.” Joe drank more. He wiped the cream mustache from his lip. “Go on, tell me how you should have berated and humiliated me in another manner.”

“So you admit what I did was hurtful. I should have talked to you privately and waited to hear what you had to say before jumping to conclusions.” Lucy placed her hands into her lap.

“Let me see.” Joe began to count the points out on his fingers. “I schemed behind your back to sell out you and your family-run business to your competition. Actually, under the circumstances, I think you took the news fairly well. I don’t know anyone who would have taken the news calmly.”

“Stop it. I know that isn’t the real truth.” Lucy went to touch the cross at her neckline and then remembered it wasn’t there. “But here we sit together in Ma’s Diner again.”

“And now you know the truth about me?” He looked intently into her eyes.

“Yes, I do know the truth. Ryan Oliver came to the office right after Christmas. He told me how you had persuaded them to go elsewhere to build their business.”

Joe nodded. “Ryan got a hold of me a few days ago. He told me he had been to the paper to see me. I am glad he told you the situation when he was there. Since the facts came from him, I came off looking better in your eyes, I bet.”

Lucy reached across the table and took his hand. “Will you ever forgive me? I am so sorry about what I did and how I hurt you.”

“Seems to me I already have forgiven you. I don’t drink hot chocolate with just anyone.” He winked taking a large gulp. “Hey, if you’re not going to drink yours, can I have it?”

Lucy pushed the cup across the table toward Joe.

“But you still don’t know the real reason I have come back,” he told her.

Lucy frowned and asked, “You mean you really don’t want to work at the paper? I am confused.” Fear began to eat away Lucy’s happiness.

“Hold on. My reapplication is a sincere one. There is nothing more I want to do with my life at this moment than to live here in Turtle Creek and be close to you.”

“Oh good. That’s what I want, too.” Lucy breathed a sigh of relief.

“I’ve come twice now to Turtle Creek to give you something, something that belongs to you.” He let go of her hands.

“Oh?” Lucy asked as she watched Joe reach into his pocket. “Well, whatever it is, I don’t care. Just as long as you are here with me, that’s all that matters.”

“You may care when you see these.” Joe held the love letters, bundled together by the fat rubber band. He laid them on the Formica table in front of her.

Lucy looked up into Joe’s face quizzically and then back down to the letters. With shaky fingers, she touched them.

“You and I are connected in a way you are not aware of—these letters.” He tapped the envelopes. “They are yours.”

“I know whose letters they are,” Lucy nearly snapped. “I am wondering how you got them.” She felt nearly paralyzed seeing them again.

“They’re not going to reach out and bite you,” Joe said.

“Are you sure?” Lucy was serious. Finally, she slid the rubber band off. Lucy picked up the top letter and turned it over in her hand. Her pulse ran hard as she opened it. After reading the first few lines, she put it back down. “These are the letters I wrote to my fiancé Steve Hudson. How did you get them?”

The waitress returned with the check. “Anything else?”

Joe shook his head. “We need some serious privacy. Like an hour’s worth.”

The waitress nodded and left.

“How did you get them?” Lucy’s asked again as her voice shook.

“I was the head psychiatrist on the psych ward at the veteran’s hospital when Steve Hudson was brought in with several other men from his army unit. All of them were shell-shocked. None were responsive but Steve was by far the worst. Along with our daily sessions, I began treating them with drug therapy. They all showed rapid signs of improvement. Initially, Steve did the best. Just as quickly he became paranoid. The onset was acute.”

Lucy gasped and covered her face with her hands. It was painful to listen to Joe’s words. Steve’s horrible death had haunted her for years. Joe had brought it all up again by returning the letters.

“I can stop if you’d like,” Joe responded.

“No, I need to hear this. Maybe I will be able to finally find peace.”

“All right.” Joe leaned back into the booth. “I withdrew his medication slowly so not to cause a radical imbalance as I tried to decide if one of the meds made him irrational or if it was the result of his condition.” Joe ran his fingers through his hair.

Lucy stared down at the letters. She needed to hear everything. “Go on.”

Nervous, Joe started fiddling with the spoon. “Since the letters were already opened and read by Steve, I decided to read them. They helped me get a sense of the man he used to be so I could better connect with him. Then one night, Steve became extremely agitated. I was off duty at the time. Somehow he was able to sneak out of his room and up to the roof. You know the rest.”

“He jumped.” Lucy sobbed.

“I know he was the love of your life.” Joe hung his head. “That is why it’s been so hard for me. Maybe it will make you feel better if you know I don’t think he knew what he was doing. He wasn’t in his right mind. Lucy, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I couldn’t do anything for him,” he reached across the table for her and she sat back.

“Please don’t touch me. Not right now.”

Joe honored her request and stopped pushing. “That’s why I can’t sleep a lot of the time. I toss and turn wondering what I could have done differently for him.”

“And sometimes when you can’t sleep you come here to sit and figure things out. You replay it over and over in your mind, wondering what you might have done differently.”

“That’s right but how did you know?”

“I have had my share of restless nights over this, too,” Lucy admitted.

“I am sleepless from guilt and you are sleepless from missing him. It’s important for you to know I did my best for him. Please believe me, Lucy.”

“I do believe you, Joe,” she softly whispered.

“I failed him and I failed you. I took his death personally. I was a wreck over it so I took some time off. I even started seeing a psychiatrist myself. In the beginning of treating Steve, the goal of reading the letters was to get to know him so I could help him more effectively. Instead I got to know you. I found myself falling in love with his girl. I fell in love with you, Lucy Collins.”

“How could you possibly fall in love with me through letters?” she asked, tears streaming down her cheeks. “There is no way you could have gotten to know me.”

“Your words came from your heart. Many letters were poetic and loving. Others were funny, even cheeky at times. But they all had personality and such passion.” Joe spread the letters out until they completely covered the top of the table.

He picked one up and read the postmark. Without opening it, and from having memorized them, he said, “In this one, you talked about how important your faith is to you. You wrote, and I quote, ‘A life without faith in God isn’t worth living.’” Joe set it back down and quickly picked up another. Again, he read the postmark and didn’t open it. From his heart he said, “In this one you talked about your birthday. It’s August twelfth. You got a new bathing suit…by the way, I’d like to see you in it sometime. In this other letter…” Joe took one out from the middle, “You talked about putting your dog down. Old Rusty was a Golden Retriever and you had him from the time you were ten and weren’t sure you could sleep well without him at the foot of your bed. You left tear marks and some of the words were smeared from them. Go ahead and look if you want.”

Joe waited while Lucy slipped the stationery out from the jagged edges of where it had been opened. She read it to herself. It was just as Joe had said. Lucy ran her fingers over the smudged words. She looked up at him.

He continued, ready with a new envelope in his hand. “In this one you talked about your dad’s heart attack and treatment. He had a top-notch heart specialist. By the way, the doctor is a personal friend of mine.”

“So that’s how you knew about Dad’s heart condition.”

Joe was on a roll and picked up another envelope. “In this one, you talked about wanting to go back to college and finish your degree but you felt you were needed at the newspaper since your dad still wasn’t doing well…”

“Okay, I get it. I get it.” She held up her hand to stop him from rattling through them all. There was one letter in particular she dreaded. If he read that one, she’d completely fall apart. Please, God, make him stop.

“After Steve’s death, I went into private practice thinking a change in the type of patients I treated would be good for me. But it wasn’t so. Lucy, your letters…no, not the letters but you, you brought me through numerous dark moments. Now, two years later, I am returning them to you.” Joe began putting them into order by date. When finished, he set them in front of her. “They have found their way back home to you.”

Lucy looked at them for several minutes, gathering her thoughts before speaking again. “When you walked into the newspaper early December, did you come for the job or to give these back?”

“I was there to return your letters.”

“From that very first day, Mike said you had come for a reason. I thought he was crazy, but he was right. Why didn’t you just tell me the truth in the beginning?” Lucy wanted to know. Had to know.

“Because I felt like I had known you for so long, dreamed of you for so long. When I walked in that snowy day and there you were, walking up to the counter as though you had not a care in the entire world, I thought to myself, ‘There she is. She’s as full of spunk as I had imagined.’ My heart caught at the sight of you and suddenly I realized I couldn’t turn around and walk back out the door, never to see you again. Not once I had found you. The only chance I had was if I hung around long enough for you to get to know me. With a bit of luck, I thought you might someday grow to love me, too. It was important for you to see me as a man, not as Steve’s shrink. I didn’t know how to do that.

“I was just reaching into my briefcase for the letters when you mentioned the job posting. I had googled the paper so many times that I knew about it but it didn’t occur to me until that moment it might be the way for you to get to know me. Suddenly, it became the only thing I wanted to do in the entire world—live in a small town, writing words that inspired people, and being close to you. Mike was right; I was not who I appeared to be.”

“I’m…speechless.” Lucy looked lovingly into Joe’s face. “When I read your last editorial in the paper, I knew I had to find you and tell you I loved you, beg your forgiveness.”

“I am the one who needs forgiveness.”

“Joe, what if you had just handed me the letters and turned around to walk out that day a month ago? I never would have gotten to know you. I never would have fallen in love with you.”

“And we wouldn’t be sitting here right now having this conversation.”

“That day driving into Chicago, I was so sure you would follow me back.”

“But then Angela gave you a bum steer?”

“She sure did.”

Joe moved to Lucy’s side of the booth and cupped her face in his hands. “I love you, Lucy. Only you.”

“Finally! You said it! I have prayed you would say those words to me.”

“I wanted to tell you I loved you when you took me to the Cotton Candy House, but I had to tell you the whole truth first. I know you loved Steve very much; the letters are proof enough of that. I don’t want Steve to be a ghost between us, keeping us from our happiness.”

“I don’t want that either.” Lucy couldn’t meet Joe’s gaze.

“Something is wrong.”

“Nothing,” Lucy insisted shutting her eyes.

“Do you remember how many letters you sent to Steve?”

“Yes,” Lucy opened her eyes and focused her gaze ahead as she remembered. “I wrote once a week for two years. The last one was at Christmastime and there were one hundred and four letters altogether.”

“Here are your love letters, Lucy. Count them.”

Lucy had no idea what that had to do with anything but she would do as Joe asked. She began counting, laying each to the side making a second pile as she went. “There’s one hundred and three letters here, but I’m sure I wrote one hundred and four. I kept track on my calendar.” Lucy looked at Joe. “You must have lost one.”

Joe reached into his pocket and took out the last one, handing it to her.

Lucy turned it over in her hand. “It’s never been opened,” she gasped.

“That’s because it arrived a few days after Steve died. He never read your last letter.”

“He never opened this one?” She shook her head.

“No.”

“Why didn’t you open it and read it? I never would have known. No one would have known.”

“It never seemed right for me to do that.” He brushed aside the lock of hair that always fell in her eyes. His voice was low, “Give me another chance with you.”

“I just hired you back at the paper, didn’t I?” she half smiled as she wiped away her tears with a paper napkin.

“I feel as though something has just happened between us that I need to fix.”

“Some things cannot be changed overnight.” She drew a breath.

The Christmas Edition

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Twenty-Two

January 8

“Hey, let’s go for a drive, Boss!” Joe swiveled Lucy around in her chair until she faced him.

“Haven’t we got plenty of work to do right here, Ace? You set a high bar for us over the holidays and we can’t afford to get into a January slump now.” She playfully cuffed his chin.

“I say we need a break. There is something important I want to show you.” Joe pulled Lucy to her feet and kissed the tip of her nose.

“Well, all right. It’s almost noon so we can chalk this up to lunch.” Lucy agreed as she put on her coat and fished under her desk for her boots.

They drove out of town, past the Ma’s Diner sign and right on by Sugar Plum Road. Lucy looked back over her shoulder with longing. “I sure do miss that house.”

“I know you do.” Joe reached over and took her hand in his, giving it a squeeze. “It was a fine house.”

Joe turned his left signal on and drove onto the lake road. It’s a nice day for a ride . The sky was clear which made the air frigid, but seeing the sun in the blue sky felt good. The dips and turns in the road were familiar and comforting. In a few more months, the weather would be warm and roadways would fill with blue chicory and Queen Anne’s lace. She couldn’t wait.

“Okay, just where are we going?” Lucy asked not able to hold in her excitement any longer.

“You’ll see.” He answered with a gleam in his eye. “We’re almost there.”

After a string of hard shoulder mailboxes, Joe turned onto a private drive.

“I’ve lived here all my life and never knew this road existed,” Lucy told Joe.

Joe didn’t answer. He kept right on smiling and driving. Smiling and driving.

They drove on for several minutes more, slowing as the wheels of the vehicle dipped in and out of ruts. The drive snaked around between trees covered in ice and snow. Then they came to a stop in front of a small cottage painted white. The one story had lovely old gingerbread trim all the way around it. “What do you think?”

“Are you buying this?” She looked at Joe.

“I’m thinking about it. I can’t live over your parent’s garage forever, you know.”

“You are full of surprises, aren’t you?”

Joe smiled mischievously as he got out. “I’ll race you to the front porch.”

This time he didn’t go around to help Lucy out first. Instead, he took off running as fast as he could up to the front porch. Breathless, he turned around to see Lucy slowly walking up, hands in her pockets.

“No fair you were supposed to run, yet here you are taking your own sweet time instead,” he good-naturedly scolded.

“You win this time, Joe.” Lucy walked up and kissed his cheek. She stood next to Joe and looked around. “What a view. The woods are thick, too. Very private.”

“Do you suppose there are any hidden leaves in there that are yet unnoticed?” Half a smile slid up on Joe’s face.

“I imagine so.” Lucy smiled right back up at him. “This is a fabulous piece of property. Now you have piqued my interest. I can’t wait to see inside the cottage.”

Joe put his arm around her, levering just enough of his strength to hold her still.

“We’ll go in a minute but first I want to tell you about the creek that wiggles out from the woods. You can’t see it from here but it’s still there. Listen. Can you hear it?”

Lucy enthusiastically cuddled into Joe. She remained quiet. “I do hear it. I can imagine you sitting out here in the summer watching for deer while listening to your creek. I’ll have to buy you a house-warming gift. How about a rocking chair?”

“Just one rocking chair? But I count two of us here.” He caught her chin with his fingertips.

Lucy didn’t answer. She was preoccupied with her own thoughts.

“Come on, now it’s time to show you around inside the place.” Joe put the key in the lock and they walked inside. Lucy looked around the living room while he went to the back of the cottage. “There’s a butler’s pantry off the kitchen,” he called. “Come and look.”

“I love that they kept the old glass in the top cabinets.” Lucy ran her fingers over the wavy glass that felt so delicate. She walked from room to room, opening closets and gazing out the windows. When she had been through all the rooms, she went back into the living room where Joe now waited.

“There’s two working fireplaces—one in the living room and the other in the bedroom.” Joe leaned on the mantle.

“Yes, I noticed that, but before you light any fires, you better get the chimneys checked out. There is a lot of wildlife around here and a bird or squirrel might have found the pipe to be a comfortable winter home.”

“I’ll be sure to remember that. Well, tell me, what do you think of the place?”

“It’s all original and still in excellent shape. I must congratulate you. This old house is a gem.”

“If I buy it, will you live here with me?” His arms went around her. He leaned his forehead on hers and their noses touched.

Lucy eased away, but not by much. “Joe, you might as well know, I was offered a position at a law firm.” She gave a deep sigh and bit her lower lip.

Joe emotionally stumbled and his face showed this news caught him by surprise. “I hadn’t counted on that.”

“I only said I was offered a position. I haven’t told you if I took it or not.”

Now Joe could see the bite of her lip only served to keep her from laughing as Lucy smiled in a foxy manner.

“Ah, you’re teasing me, aren’t you, Boss?” He shook his finger at her.

“Yes, I am teasing you, Ace. I turned it down at the time of the offer; I just like messing with you.” Lucy smacked him on the behind and Joe caught her by the wrist, swinging her around to face him.

Joe dug in one of the pockets of his worn jeans trying to find something. “Hang on a minute while I find it.” He checked the other pocket. Then slowly he pulled out a silver diamond ring. He looked at it for a bit, turning it this way and that. It caught the sun coming in through the old, wavy windows of the house and sent sparkles around the room. Joe held it up to Lucy. “Marry me?”

“Marry you?” Lucy hummed. She never would have expected this. Not this soon, anyway. She hardly had a chance to catch her breath since Joe had returned to town. Something made her stall.

“Lucy, in all seriousness, I know this is not the house you imagined yourself living in but that was your old dream. I thought you might have a new dream, one we can share.” He wore a lovable smile. “Marry me?”

Her mind slipped into neutral. Marriage? “Ah, would you mind repeating the question?”

“This isn’t as hard as you’re making it to be. It’s simply a yes or no question. Will you marry me, Lucy?” Joe was still smiling, but the longer she took in answering, the more his smile began to wane. “You were expecting flowers and candlelight for your proposal, weren’t you?”

“No…”

“Then it’s the house, isn’t it? You don’t like this house? That’s okay with me, we can find another one. I don’t care where we live. I just want to live with you. Forever.”

“Joe, the house is fine. Perfect actually and with a bit of time, I know I will like it even better than the other place.”

“Then what?” Joe pulled a lock of curly hair from her eyes.

“Joe…I can’t.” Lucy walked to one of the windowsills. She sat at the edge of it.

His smile crumpled right along with his hope. “I know what is holding you back. You’re still in love with Steve.” Joe touched the nape of her neck and then her shoulder.

Lucy hung her head. “Yes, it’s because of Steve.” When she held her head up, tears were streaming down her face.

“I love you with all my heart, Lucy, and I will be the best husband for you. However I can not, I won’t compete with a ghost.”

Lucy stood up as she pulled the one hundred forth letter from her pocket. It was all crinkled but remained unopened. “It’s time you read my last letter to Steve.” She held it out to him.

“This wasn’t written to me. I can’t. It’d be wrong for me to read it.”

“This is no time to be reticent. You read the others.”

“Yea, but those were different. Steve had already opened and read them.”

“Open it.” Her voice was flat but the tears just kept right on streaming. “Before I can give you an answer about marrying you, I want you to read my last letter. Then you can ask me to marry you again— if you still want to.”

“ If I still want to?” Joe looked at her long and hard.

Lucy watched as Joe tore open the top of the envelope.

He took out the pages and read the curvy letters written in ink.

Dearest Steve,

I seem to have had another week of sleepless nights. Today, I was up at dawn again. As usual, I reached for my Bible and read the passage in Proverbs about how God has always known me. I find that comforting especially these days since I feel I really have not known myself or been myself for a while.

After reading my Bible, I read my favorite poem. I bet you still remember that Robert Frost is the author of it. It’s the one about two paths diverging in a yellow wood and taking the one less traveled. I guess that is the theme of my heart these days. I have been on the road well traveled and it's not what God has for me. He has tamped down a special path for me to travel, and at long last, I've decided to be obedient to Him, and follow, even if it means I must hurt someone I really care about.

Steve, I have changed and am no longer the person I once was. We both have grown but in different directions—away from one another. Steve, this is so hard for me to say, but I don’t love you. Not in the way a woman should love the man she is to marry. If I weren’t honest with you, then my words would be empty and meaningless.

Now that you are safely home in the States, and in good care, it’s time you know. I am breaking off our commitment. I don't believe you are the man God has chosen for me, nor am I the girl meant for you. Please forgive me. Be well.

Lucy.

Joe kept rereading the letter. “Oh my gosh, Lucy. This is not what I would have expected to read at all. I’m surprised.”

“I know. You expected another heartfelt letter, but it isn’t.” Lucy began to pace the floor. “Steve saw me as someone I wasn’t; you saw me as Steve did. It’s all an illusion. Your love for me is based on this girl you imagined, a girl you thought loved her fiancé to his dying day. Now you know that isn’t true.”

“Lucy…” Joe started across the room toward her. Lucy stepped away, hungering for the feel of his arms around her and desiring to hold him in hers. But there was far too much to say to him first.

“Listen to me, Joe. In the beginning, I did love Steve. He asked me to marry him the Christmas before he went overseas.”

“When he gave you the heart ornament?”

“Yes, that’s right. Looking back on it now, I realize he didn’t love me at all. I was just a girl he could write to while he was gone. A ring on my finger meant I would stay put.”

“You don’t need to explain this, Lucy. It doesn’t matter to me.”

“It matters to me, Joe! You cannot believe a lie!” Lucy stamped her foot. “After a year passed, I suddenly came to the conclusion that not only didn’t I know Steve, but my feelings had changed, too. Even knowing this, I couldn’t let him down while he was overseas so I kept writing to him. One more year. During that time, I no longer wore his ring, but I didn’t tell him.”

“Steve never read the last letter. He died thinking you still loved him.”

“Yes, that unopened letter you handed to me was a gift. Up until then, I blamed myself for Steve’s death. Joe, you set me free. Steve never read my words of unfaithfulness. I did not cause his death.”

“We both have to stop taking on guilt.” Joe held up the envelope. “These are the words of an honest woman.”

“But the words in the letters before that were anything but honest. You fell in love with that woman. Don’t you see she doesn’t really exist?”

“But you exist. Lucy, I have gotten to know the real you. I love you.”

“Don’t say that, Joe; I mean it. I have betrayed you on so many levels. First, when I thought you sold us out, and then I believed Angela...”

“Stop rehashing, Lucy. Leave that behind us.”

“…and now I have betrayed you with the letters. You said these letters helped you through some dark times. If that is true, I am thankful they did some good. But, as you now know, they were based on a lie…at least the last year was.”

“You’ve proven my point. In the last year, you stopped writing Steve about your feelings. It was obvious to me your feelings had changed. I saw it. I bet he noticed it, too.”

“What do you mean?”

“Each of the letters became short stories, snapshots of your day. You wrote about your life in Turtle Creek, the people who lived here, and about that wonderful quirky family of yours. By the time, I stepped into the newspaper office that day, I knew everyone. It was like coming home after a long tiring trip.

“I didn’t fall in love with you because you loved Steve. I fell in love with you because of the contents of the letters that revealed your character. Like the day you rescued a turtle from being run over by a hay wagon. You returned it to the pond and sat on the shore until it disappeared into the water.”

“I still look for it every time I drive down that particular stretch of road.”

“I know you do.” He held her face, his thumbs stroking her cheeks. “In another letter, you said how the employees of the newspaper loved sponsoring the holiday food drives. It was followed by pages of how we need to live our lives helping others the year round. I particularly liked the one where you searched half the night for your neighbor’s house cat, out in the rain and thunder.”

“How do you remember all of this?” Lucy asked as her voice filled with adoration for him.

“When your dad had the heart attack,” Joe continued. “I was right there with you, emotionally sitting beside you at the hospital. All of this paled in comparison to meeting you in person. I want you for my wife.”

“For your wife, huh? Does this mean I have to learn to make casseroles? And wash the dishes?”

“I am not asking you to marry me for your culinary skills…”

“Or lack thereof?”

“Or lack thereof. I’ll do all the dishwashing if that is what it’ll take for you to say yes.”

This time Lucy didn’t step away from Joe. She welcomed his touch on her neck and then her shoulder.

“Close your eyes, Lucy. Where do you see yourself one year from now?”

“I-I-I don’t know what you mean.” Confused, she looked at Joe with worry. If she said the wrong thing, would he be disappointed?

“We focus on the small details no one else ever notices, but right now, I ask you to look into our future with the eyes of faith,” Joe begged.

Lucy closed her eyes. In a minute, a smile spread across her face. “I see us in matching red sweaters by a Christmas tree.”

“Are we holding a Cocker Spaniel?” He placed his hand in the small of her back.

“No. We’re holding a baby.” Lucy’s heart pounded as Joe tangled his hands in her hair. He angled her mouth to his and kissed her until she thought her legs would give out. Lucy fought to gather her thoughts. It was true. Joe loved her as she loved him.

Joe pulled back and looked at Lucy. “I want our own story. I want to go shopping every Christmas for ornaments that tell our family history.”

“I want that, too, Joe.”

“For the last time, will you marry me, Lucy?”

“Come to think of it, we will be very happy living here in this cottage by a creek wiggling out from the woods. You know, I’ve been thinking about that housewarming gift. I do believe I should buy a truckload of rocking chairs, since we’ll be living here and having babies. Yes, Joe, I’ll marry you.”

His smile grew as he slid the ring onto her finger. Lucy stood looking down at her hand. Joe was her love. She could never say goodbye to him.

He kissed her gently. Then took her in his arms and waltzed her around the Gingerbread Cottage.

The Christmas Edition

Epilogue

Saying Goodbye to Bachelorhood

by Joseph McNamara

Excuse me, folks, but I took a short detour. I am back now, for good this time.

What have I been up to since my return to Turtle Creek? I have my old job back for one thing. And behold I even have gotten myself engaged. Me…engaged. Who’da ever thought it? Not any of my old buddies, that’s for sure. But none of them have met Lucy Collins, yet.

Ever since the moment Lucy Collins agreed to be my wife, I’ve been whistling. Maybe you have seen me walking with a lighter step and wearing an idiot ear-to-ear grin. Yep, that was I. Being in love just brings it out in me.

Engagement serves a purpose. It holds one’s feet to the ground while tying dreams to the tail of a kite. Bachelorhood left me with that self-doubting sense of missing something worthwhile, that I was too cranky or boring to be stuck with.

There are some things you should know about my bride-to-be. She is punctual. She is nostalgic. And she is absolutely nuts about old pink houses.

She doesn’t know this but I watch the look on her face when the sun goes down. The colors of the sky are spectacular but not so much in comparison to the look in Lucy’s eyes. It’s like she is seeing it for the first time. When she gets that look on her face, I sigh and think to myself, I get to watch her like this every day for the rest of my life.

For a long while, I thought bachelorhood was the way I was to go, but that was only because I hadn’t met Lucy yet. Now that I know her, I want to spend every moment of each day figuring her out and discovering more about this wonderful creation God allowed me to meet.

Lucy taught me valuable skills like finding the right country road into town. Before Lucy, I was lost, alone and shed countless tears. Now, I have a partner to share those tears. With Lucy, I have laughed out loud so often and so hard that my stomach still aches from the memory. How does one say goodbye to bachelorhood?

With unspeakable joy.

The Christmas Edition

Last night Lucy slept peacefully—dreaming of the almost kiss, soothed by the hope of a first kiss. Today, she closed her eyes and tried to imagine his arms around her and his lips on hers.

“Thanks for asking me along today.”

“I must make a small correction. I didn’t just ask you along; we both have work to do and I need you.” Her blush was immediate. She noticed Joe’s eyes. They were soft gray, almost pale, but right now they were darker, emitting a strong emotion.

Joe pulled to the side of the road and got out. Lucy wondered if they had a flat tire and was surprised when he opened her door and pulled her out onto the snow. With tenderness, Joe drew her to him. She didn’t have the sense to look away. She was locked in this moment and knew she’d carry it to her grave. His touch made her melt into him. His arms kept her from falling. Joe brought his lips within an inch of hers. He looked into her eyes as if asking if this was all right. Her breath caught in anticipation of what the next moment would bring. She wouldn’t turn away this time. The sun was high now, casting them in winter radiance. “Joe…”

His mouth prevented her from saying another syllable. This was their first kiss, happening right here at the side of the road just under the snowy boughs of tall pine trees. Joe kissed each hand, her neck and then her lips. He used his lips as one would use their fingers when plotting the way to go on a map. Then he gathered her even closer. She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him for all she was worth.

He stepped back and whistled. “We needed to get that out of the way.”

The Christmas Edition

The

Christmas

Edition

by

Robin Shope

The Christmas Edition

Chapter Eight

December 5

Lucy breezed into the office with the scent of winter wind on her clothes. Her camera bag was slung over her left shoulder. “Want to come with me?” She sweetly invited, swaying her hips side to side.

“Sure! Where are we going, Boss?” He couldn’t stop looking at her.

“There are five towns I want to visit. I’ll shoot photos of the townspeople and their decorations while you, as my man-on-the-street, will be interviewing people.”

“Sounds like fun. What’s the theme?”

“Christmas, of course, silly.” Lucy looked at the wall next to Joe’s desk. “I see your lists seem to be quickly procreating. What time did you get to work this morning?”

“Not long ago,” he answered not meeting her eyes.

“You were gone by seven at least. When I got up, I checked the drive and your SUV was missing.”

“By the way, I looked at your photographs in the office.”

She scrunched her nose and blushed. “I know it was silly to frame them but Dad likes to have my work hanging up.”

“The black and white photographs are particularly amazing with the way you used the light and dark contrast. They remind me of Cecil B. DeMille’s movies in the 1930s and 40s.”

Lucy knew that was over the top praise but didn’t say anything. It would have come across as false modesty.

“Lucy, they took my breath away. They are works of art. You should send them somewhere, like…to magazines.”

“Aw, how kind of you to say,” Lucy demurred. “But now you have gone too far. Magazines are filled with pictures much better than mine. I am an amateur and any professional in that field would spot me in a heartbeat.”

“You’re wrong. You have a fresh eye. In some ways, you are like me; we stop to notice the little things other people don’t. When I was younger this consumed me. I find I am still a bit on the obsessive side.”

“Now this sounds interesting.” Lucy laughed. She pulled a chair over to Joe’s desk and set her equipment on the floor. Lucy sat with one leg crossed over the other. “Tell me more.”

“One of your most fascinating pictures is of a forest. There is a saying ‘you can’t see the forest through the trees’, but you take it a step further. In one of the pictures, you singled out one leaf. One obscure leaf and then you focused your camera lens on it. Of all the trees in the entire forest, why did you decide on that particular one?”

“I don’t know,” Lucy answered quickly. “I looked up and there it was.”

“Oh no. There’s more to it than that. You selected that leaf, that single leaf.”

Lucy reflected for a moment and then answered, “I decided on that one leaf because it was lost in the array of thousands of leaves on hundreds of trees. I felt I was the only one who ever saw it and so I snapped its picture.”

Joe leaned back in his chair until it creaked. He rested his elbows on the armrest and pressed his fingertips together. “What else?”

“I don’t know what you mean?” She jiggled her leg.

“Close your eyes and think about that day. You are standing in the woods. What kind of day is it?”

Lucy closed her eyes. “I don’t know.”

“Was it rainy, cloudy…”

“Sunny! It was sunny that day and I will have you know I only took pictures and left only footprints.” Lucy peeked one eye open.

“No fair, you’re looking. Keep your eyes closed.” He smiled. “Tell me about the moment you selected that leaf?”

Lucy took a deep breath and shut her eyes again. “It was really quiet in the woods. I went alone because I like it that way. I stepped off the trail and made my own path between trees, over fallen logs. It was uneven terrain but I welcomed it. I kept walking, moving further and further away from houses. So quiet, I nearly heard the beat of my heart but then the sound of wind came gushing through like a storm drowning out everything else. Strange. The sun was so bright above the trees that at certain points it dried up the shadows completely. When I looked up, the sunlight was so sharp I had to cup my hand over my eyes.

“I went further into the woods, where the shade was deeper and it was much colder. I heard the caw of a crow. It was somewhere close and I had to find him. I wanted to see what he looked like so I got my camera ready and followed the trunk of an old oak up until it reached a branch that had three crooks in it. Just the very second I spotted the crow, it flew off. The wind kept right on coming making the leaves spin like colorful tops. It made a sound like it was talking in its own secret language. Some leaves were knocked away from the tree and floated to the ground as though the fight to stay where they were wasn’t worth the trouble.

“Then I saw the leaf, small and so pale that it was nearly wiped clear of any color at all. And yet it had that hint of yellow.” Lucy opened her eyes. “It held onto the tree fearlessly.”

“That’s what I thought,” he said with an approving nod. “And that story is what I saw in your picture.”

Tears filtered into Lucy’s eyes. Joe got her.

“Lucy, the paper should buy a domain and then through the web address, you would be able to do a photographic journal.”

Lucy grimaced as though someone had accidentally stepped on her foot. “Come on, let’s get our day started.”

****

A blanket of snow circled above and then blew sideways as they rode in Joe’s SUV down County O toward their first stop of the day, the town of Delavan. Lucy told him how to get there. The country seemed to confuse him. Lucy figured it was because they didn’t have tall buildings that blocked out the sky. He knew how to deal with traffic and skyscrapers. It was wide-open spaces that caused the problems.

“Is another blizzard on its way?” Joe turned on his wipers and tipped his head to get a good look at the sky.

“None in the forecast; this bit of snow is merely winter air,” Lucy said, her cheeks crimson from cold. Her mind was centered on Joe and the fun she knew they would have as they spent today together, all day. She looked at him from the corner of her eye. There was an aura about him that stirred her emotions. No other man had ever gotten to her like he did. Maybe it was because he wasn’t from around here. Every guy she had ever dated was from Turtle Creek. She hoped she was as interesting to him as he was to her. Thinking about Joe almost kissing her yesterday made her sigh.

“Is everything okay?” he looked her way.

“Very okay.” She punctuated her answer with a smile. Right then she resolved that even if it took all night she would sit in this vehicle until she got her kiss. No flaking out on him this time. Business protocol or not, she was ready for the business of romance.

Joe reached over, grabbed her left leg and gave it a squeeze. “You seem to have gone somewhere.”

She took hold of his hand and held on to it. “No, I am right here with you.” He made her heart race. Last night Lucy slept peacefully—dreaming of the almost kiss, soothed by the hope of a first kiss. Today, she closed her eyes and tried to imagine his arms around her and his lips on hers.

“Thanks for asking me along today.”

“I must make a small correction. I didn’t just ask you along; we both have work to do and I need you.” Her blush was immediate. She noticed Joe’s eyes. They were soft gray, almost pale, but right now they were darker, emitting a strong emotion.

Joe pulled to the side of the road and got out. Lucy wondered if they had a flat tire and was surprised when he opened her door and pulled her out onto the snow. With tenderness, Joe drew her to him. She didn’t have the sense to look away. She was locked in this moment and knew she’d carry it to her grave. His touch made her melt into him. His arms kept her from falling. Joe brought his lips within an inch of hers. He looked into her eyes as if asking if this was all right. Her breath caught in anticipation of what the next moment would bring. She wouldn’t turn away this time. The sun was high now, casting them in winter radiance. “Joe…”

His mouth prevented her from saying another syllable. This was their first kiss, happening right here at the side of the road just under the snowy boughs of tall pine trees. Joe kissed each hand, her neck and then her lips. He used his lips as one would use their fingers when plotting the way to go on a map. Then he gathered her even closer. She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him for all she was worth.

He stepped back and whistled. “We needed to get that out of the way. Now, its time for us to get to work.” Joe helped Lucy back into the vehicle, and within minutes, they were on their way. Once they reached Delavan, they turned onto the brick street of Walworth Avenue. Joe parked in the first available spot. “Should I apologize for kissing you back there on the road?”

“You better not!” Lucy threw her arms back around his neck and kissed him again. She couldn’t get enough of Joe’s fabulous lips. By the delightful feel of them, she guessed they had gotten a lot of practice over the years. “Okay! Now I think we’re really ready to start our day.” She breathed. “Here are your press credentials.” She handed it to him to wear around his collar, just like she wore hers. Lucy grabbed a hold of her camera case with one hand and opened the car door with the other.

As soon as her feet hit the street, there was no mistaking it. The town’s decorating committee had done an excellent job. Garlands were strung from lamppost to lamppost all the way down the street and more garland swaged across the street. At each of the two intersections, a giant bell was hung. Wreaths decorated every store’s entrance. Each was unique, indicative of the store’s wares. Bradley’s Department Store had a wreath made of miniature sweaters. Coachman’s Music Store had small instruments on theirs. The antique store had icicles made of antique silvered mercury glass with hand painted decoration. Elizabeth’s Family Restaurant had the day’s blue-plate special displayed. Boutelle’s Bakery had wedding cake toppers wired onto their wreath. For two blocks on either side of the street, door wreaths greeted customers. Lucy took pictures of them all.

Joe started his man-on-the-street interviews and Lucy caught pictures of him with the townspeople.

“Why is Christmas your favorite holiday?” Joe asked a high-school girl named Tina.

“Because of the great presents!” She squealed effectively diminishing Lucy’s hearing capacity for the day.

“But don’t you get presents on your birthday and other times of the year?” he pressed.

Tina’s brow wrinkled. She hadn’t considered this. “Yeah, I guess. It’s just more special now.”

“In what way is it more special?”

Now she seemed to understand. “It’s the time of year that my family seems to really get along.”

“Why is that?” Joe pushed.

“All year long we seem to go our own way. Mom and Dad have their work schedules. I play softball, then basketball and then track. But Christmas brings us back together. We go to church and that makes us think of others, like those we love. We’re a closer family for it, for a little while at least.”

“Good answer!” Joe gave her a high-five and wrote down her full name so he’d get it right for the article. “Now be sure to buy The Turtle Creek Newspaper between now and Christmas so you can read all about yourself.”

“Give me your best smile,” Lucy instructed.

Tina stood in front of the bank and posed one foot in front of the other. Lucy took a head shot which revealed a mouth filled with braces. “Excellent!”

Lucy took Joe’s arm. Today she felt bold, so she acted on those feelings. It paid off as Joe smiled broadly at her and kissed her cheek.

“Who’s next?” she asked.

“You tell me who strikes your fancy.”

Lucy looked up and down the street and then she made her decision. “How about that older couple walking right toward us? They look like they might be a good interview.”

Joe approached them by first showing his credentials. “If you have a moment, I would love to ask you a few questions for The Turtle Creek Newspaper.”

When the lady saw Lucy with her camera, she pulled off her knit cap and began to straighten her hair. “I guess it’s all right. My name is Blanche and this is my husband, Herbert.”

“Nice to meet you both,” Joe shook their hands. “How many Christmases have you spent with this man beside you, whom I assume is your husband?”

“Sure enough, Herbert is my husband.” She took Herbert’s hand. “We have been together not nearly long enough. Only five years.”

Lucy was surprised by her answer. “Five years, huh?” she butted in to Joe’s interview and then shot him an “I’m sorry” look. His smile told her he didn’t mind so she continued. “Love happened late in life?”

“Just the opposite. Love happened early in life while we were still in grammar school. It continued on through high school, but then the war came and Herbert left. I married someone else. He came home and married the daughter of a gas station owner which has since gone out of business.”

“Gas was cheap back then, ten cents a gallon,” Herbert had his first say.

“So how did you two finally get back together?” Joe asked.

“Death,” Herbert said.

“He means the death of our spouses. You have to forgive my husband’s abruptness,” Blanche explained. “Both our spouses ended up in the same nursing home. It’s terrible losing your loved one, but Herbert and I were there for one another. That’s where we reconnected. After they died, we married. It seemed natural, almost meant to be.”

“And we haven’t spent a day apart since,” Herbert squeezed his wife’s hand.

“So we are making up for the lost years and Christmas has become a miraculous time of the year for us. We know we have more days behind us than ahead so we make every moment count, every Christmas meaningful.” Herbert and Blanche looked at each other in a unique way, as if they could read one another’s thoughts. Lucy adjusted the settings on her camera and took their picture.

When the couple walked away, she caught Joe wiping a tear from his eye. He looked at her as if he needed to offer an explanation. “That wind is so sharp.”

But there was no wind today. “It sure is,” she agreed sharing this moment with him was special.

Joe’s next pick was a young couple coming down the street with three kids. “This one is all yours,” Lucy said and stepped back.

Again Joe introduced himself and flashed his credentials. The woman was anxious to answer Joe’s questions but the husband looked irritated. The middle-school boy tugged at his father’s arm as though he had somewhere he wanted to be instead of out on the street, answering questions. The two smaller girls danced around their parents.

“What is your Christmas wish?” Joe asked the woman.

“Peace on earth.” She grabbed the shoulder of one of the girls just before she ran into the street.

“Nice sentiment,” Joe agreed.

“Did you say ‘peace on earth’? I want peace in our family! These kids are driving us nuts!” the man complained.

Joe wasn’t deterred. “Oh, so the little blessings haven’t been tamed yet?”

“Not by any means,” the man scowled. “The holidays make it worse. They get all jazzed up on candy and thoughts of Santa bringing them presents. All I hear about for months leading up to Christmas is what I can buy them.”

“I envy you,” Joe said as he looked from child to child and then back to the man.

“Huh?”

“What a great time in their lives to teach them about giving,” Joe told them. “There are angel trees all over town. They remind us of the needs of others. More important, the recipients are reminded that they are not forgotten. This is a way your children can get involved by helping someone their age.”

“You know that is a great idea, hon,” the woman told her husband who immediately warmed to the idea.

Joe and Lucy followed the family into the bank. Just inside the door was a five-foot tall tree covered with paper angels. Each angel had the name of a child written on it along with his or her Christmas wish. Lucy and Joe stepped back to watch in silence as the Humphrey family started a family tradition.

Mrs. Humphrey patiently explained to her children about how not every child is as blessed as they are. It seemed to fall on deaf ears until she took one of the angels down from the tree. “On Christmas morning, this child by the name of Kylie would love to have a Barbie doll.”

“You mean Kylie only gets one gift?” the taller of the two girls asked.

“That’s right,” Mr. Humphrey said. “But there will be no gifts for any of these children if others don’t help.”

His words struck a chord with all three children. The boy began to read the information on the angels, trying to connect. In a few minutes, he had made his choice and pulled an angel off the tree. “This kid is my age. He wants a football. Can we get him one?”

“Of course,” his mother answered. “What about you girls?”

The girls both agreed to give something, too.

“Then let’s do that.” Mrs. Humphrey and the girls became absorbed in looking at the many names and wishes.

“Is it all right if I get a present for two kids, Dad?” the boy asked. “Buy me one less gift and use that money so someone else can have a Merry Christmas.”

One of the girls added, “I want to do that, too. I will give my allowance so this other girl by the name of Mary Lee can have a pair of pajamas.”

Lucy took photographs capturing the moment when the holidays changed from being all about them into being about helping others.

After the Humphrey family left, Joe said, “This is turning out to be my best Christmas.”

“Mine, too.”

Joe threaded his fingers through Lucy’s. “What now?”

“Now it’s time for food. I’m hungry.”

Table of Contents

The Christmas Edition

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-Two