The Marriage Ultimatum

Anne Marie Winston

Synopsis:

Dr. Derek Mahoney had spent years keeping his libido at bay, but sexy,
sultry Kristin Gordon had his cool composure at the breaking point. Once
upon a time she'd been content as nanny to his little girl, and now
suddenly she was looking for her own happily-ever-after - with him! And
yet, what was a man to do when a woman like Kristin flashed a whole
lotta leg and batted her long lashes in his direction?

Derek took a chance on what felt right! Holding Kristin in his arms and
having her in his bed was like an unquenchable thirst. One he might
never get tired of trying to satisfy?but was he ready for the marriage
ultimatum?

4

Dear Reader,

Welcome to Silhouette Desire and another month of sensual tales. Our
compelling continuity DYNASTIES: THE DANFORTHS continues with the story
of a lovely Danforth daughter whose well-being is threatened and the hot
U.S. Navy SEAL assigned to protect her. Maureen Child's Man Beneath the
Uniform gives new meaning to the term sleepover!

Other series this month include TEXAS CATTLEMAN'S CLUB: THE STOLEN BABY
with Cindy Gerard's fabulous Breathless for the Bachelor. Seems this
member of the Lone Star state's most exclusive club has it bad for his
best friend's sister. Lucky lady! And Rochelle Alers launches a
brand-new series, THE BLACKSTONES OF VIRGINIA, with The Long Hot Summer,
which is set amid the fascinating world of horse-breeding.

Anne Marie Winston singes the pages with her steamy
almost-marriage-of-convenience story, The Marriage Ultimatum. And in
Cherokee Stranger by Sheri WhiteFeather, a man gets a second chance with
a woman who wants him for her first time. Finally, welcome brand-new
author Michelle Celmer with Playing by the Baby Rules, the story of a
woman desperate for a baby and the hunky man who steps up to give her
exactly what she wants.

Here's hoping Silhouette Desire delivers exactly what you desire in a
powerful, passionate and provocative read!

Best,

Melissa Jeglinski

Senior Editor, Silhouette Desire

Please address questions and book requests to: Silhouette Reader Service

U.S.: 3010 Walden Ave., P.O. Box 1325, Buffalo, NY 14269 Canadian: P.O.
Box 609, Fort Erie, Ont.

The Marriage Ultimatum

Anne Marie Winston

Published by Silhouette Books

America's Publisher of Contemporary Romance

5

If you purchased this book without a cover you should be aware that this
book is stolen property. It was reported as "unsold and destroyed" to
the publisher, and neither the author nor the publisher has received any
payment for this "stripped book."

SILHOUETTE BOOKS

ISBN 0-373-76562-2

THE MARRIAGE ULTIMATUM

Copyright ©2004 by Anne Marie Rodgers

All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or
utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any
electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented,
including xerography, photocopying and recording, or in any information
storage or retrieval system, is forbidden without the written permission
of the editorial office. Silhouette Books, 233 Broadway, New York, NY
10279 U.S.A.

All characters in this book have no existence outside the imagination of
the author and have no relation whatsoever to anyone bearing the same
name or names. They are not even distantly inspired by any individual
known or unknown to the author, and all incidents are pure invention.

This edition published by arrangement with Harlequin Books U.S.A.

®and TM are trademarks of Harlequin Books U.S.A., used under license.
Trademarks indicated with ®are registered in the United States Patent
and Trademark Office, the Canadian Trade Marks Office and in other
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Visit Silhouette at www.eHarlequin.com Printed in U.S.A.

6

In memory of Winston's Shining Fancy, CD., C.G.C.

1990-2002

From the shelter straight into my heart Forever my sweet boy

7

One

"Derek. I think we should get married."

"You think we-what?" Derek Mahoney almost dropped the instrument he was
using to place sutures in a setter's paw. Sensing a break in the
veterinarian's concentration, the animal tried to flounder to its feet.

Kristin Gordon shifted her grip on the squirming canine she was holding
for Derek. Her thick, curly braid slid forward and she flipped it back
out of the way with an impatient toss of her head. "I said I think we
should get married."

"Oh." Derek grinned and relaxed. Kristin hadn't changed a bit since she
was a teenager. She still came up with all kinds of wild ideas. "Sure
thing, Kris. Do you think we could fit it in during my lunch break?"

8

Kristin's green eyes narrowed as she studied him over the top of the
dog's head. Her dark brows, striking against her porcelain skin, rose
and drew together in what Derek recognized as a temper-pending,
"This-is-not-a-joke" look. "Derek, I'm-"

"Serious," he said in unison with her.

"Morning, Dr. Mahoney. Hi, Kristin. Thanks for filling in for me. When I
dropped my kids off at school, I realized I had a flat tire." Faye,
Derek's veterinary technician, breezed into the Quartz Forge Animal
Clinic, still buttoning her lab coat. "How's old Princess doing?"

"She looks great for a twelve-year-old dog that tangled with a mower
blade." Derek lifted the animal and set her gently on the floor,
grateful for the change of subject. "Mrs. Peters is in the waiting room.
You can take Princess out to her. No vigorous exercise, antibiotics, an
Elizabethan collar if she chews at the stitches."

"Okay." Faye handed him a chart. "Mutley is coming in for exploratory
surgery tomorrow. The owner would like to talk to you again before he
goes under the knife."

Derek took the chart as he opened the door for Faye and the aging red
setter to precede him.

"Derek?"

Reluctantly, he looked over his shoulder. For a minute there, he'd
actually thought he was going to get out of the room without further
discussion. "Kris." He inclined his head toward the door. "I have a
waiting room full of anxious pet owners out

there to see. You have to take care of my daughter and get back to your
own work. Why don't we discuss the wedding plans tonight?"

"You're not taking this seriously." She was still frowning as she
marched past him.

"You're right." He couldn't resist tugging on the end of her long, blond
braid. He'd often teased her this way over the past ten years-since the
first time he'd seen her when he'd come to the Pennsylvania mountains to
interview with her father for the veterinary practice partnership Paul
Gordon was advertising. She'd been a tomboyish sixteen-year-old then.
These days, she wore her hair up in a practical, if often untidy style
most of the time.

Other than that, she hadn't changed all that much, he thought in
amusement as he surveyed her tall, slender figure clad in one of her
father's old flannel shirts and a loose pair of khaki trousers. If it
weren't for that glorious mane of curls, she could have been a boy.

"My daddy!"

Derek jerked up his head at the sound of the childish voice. He barely
had time to catch his not-quite-three-year-old daughter as Mollie hurled
herself down the hallway and into his arms.

"Hey, squirt." He rubbed his nose gently against hers. "Have you had fun
playing with Sandy while Kristin helped me?" Sandy, his receptionist,
wasn't confident handling big dogs. She'd volunteered to watch Mollie if
Kristin would help Derek until Faye arrived.

10

"We made paper dolls!" Mollie waved the string of paper figures at him
while she paused, clearly thinking of her next words. He drank in the
sight of her big. earnest blue eyes, the rosy cheeks and flyaway dark curls.

What would he have done without her? Losing Deb had been the worst
nightmare a man could ever have. One day they'd been eagerly
anticipating the birth of their first child. The next, he'd been hearing
phrases like, '"No options." "metastasizc" and I "can't risk radiation
during the pregnancy." They'd spent the remaining nine weeks of Deb's
pregnancy in a daze. It wasn't until two months after Movie's birth,
when he'd stood beside his wife's grave holding his healthy infant
daughter in his arms, that he'd begun to realize the finality of what
the doctors had told him.

Mollie was still chattering away as Kristin approached, holding the
light jacket he'd put on his daughter this morning before he'd dropped
her off at Kristin's town house. "'Come on, Mols. Let's get your coat on
and go play outside."

Derek set Mollie on the floor and she immediately ran to Kristin, who
gave her a hug before stuffing her small arms into the coat. "Were you a
good girl for Miss Sandy?"

"Yes." Mollie nodded positively.

"Great! I'm proud of you. Tell Daddy we'll see him at supper time."

"Bye, Daddy. See you at supper time," Mollie parroted, and he waved as
Kristin led her out the back

door. As the door closed behind them, he shook his head fondly. What a
pair. The two were as close as sisters. He couldn't have asked for a
better friend than Kristin over the past few years.

"Kristin takes mighty good care of that little girl of yours." Faye came
back down the hallway carrying a cat that was scheduled for blood work.

Derek nodded. "I don't know what I'd do without her." Then he grinned,
remembering how Kristin had shaken him up in the exam room. "But she
sure does come up with some mighty strange schemes."

Faye smiled. She'd worked for Kristin's father, "Doc" Gordon, before
Derek took over the practice and she'd known Kristin since she had been
a young child. "Let me guess. She wants to start flying lessons."

"Nope."

"Join the police academy?"

Derek chuckled and shook his head.

"Take an Alaskan wilderness trek?"

"Not even close. She thinks I should marry her."

To his surprise, Faye didn't give an immediate belly laugh as he'd
expected. "Hmm," was all she said. The matter-of-fact way she'd accepted
the statement shook him more than he liked.

"What does 'hmm' mean?"

Faye shrugged. "It's a pretty good idea, if you ask me."

"Are you kidding?" He stopped dead. "She's way too young for me."

"You're thirty-four years old." Faye was over

12

fifty and she only shook her head. "That's young. And Kristin was
twenty-five last week. You're not even a decade apart."

He stared at her, feeling ridiculously betrayed. He'd been sure Faye
would laugh and agree with him about Kristin's harebrained idea, "It's a
nutty idea. just like most of her other schemes."

She ignored his warning tone. "Mollie needs a mother. Who better than
the woman who's cared for her since she was born? And you need a wife,
but just anybody won't do. You need somebody who's as bullheaded as you.
somebody who will bark back when you get difficult-"

"Kristin is hardly a woman." He knew his face mirrored the irritation he
was feeling.

Faye hooted. "Give me a break, Derek. She ain't a man and she's way too
old to be a teenager!"

"That may be. but she's not marriage material!" His tone was curt as he
turned away and continued down the hall before she could see the red
flush he was pretty sure was climbing his face. Faye must be crazy. He
had no intention of ever marrying again. Why should he? His life was
just fine the way it was-as fine as it ever could be without Deb. No one
could replace her in his heart.

Besides, Deb hadn't been bullheaded and they'd never had a shouting
match in the entire ten years of their marriage. She was nothing like
Kristin, a whirlwind of opinionated energy. No. no one could ever be the
same as his sweet, gentle Deb.

She'd been warm and loving, filling the world

around her with her own special brand of quiet peace until the cancer
had extinguished her life and destroyed his. If it hadn't been for
Mollie, their precious gift, thankfully untouched by the illness that
ravaged her mother, he'd have laid down and died with Deb.

The thought of his bouncy baby girl soothed the deep sorrow that still
filled him at the thought of living a lifetime without Deb. He was darn
lucky to have such a handy arrangement with Kris. Mollie couldn't be in
better hands.

Hands. Recalling the chart he still held, he remembered it was Friday
and he had patients waiting. He wanted to be finished by noon so he
could spend the afternoon doing well-checks on new arrivals at the
Appalachian Animal Sanctuary, a nonprofit shelter Kristin's father had
founded a few years before his death. Forcing himself to dismiss
thoughts of Kristin, he went on down the hall to talk about Mutley.

But that evening, as he said farewell to the volunteers at the animal
sanctuary's on-site clinic, Kristin's words were still replaying
themselves in his ears. He hadn't been able to think of anything else
today. Every time he'd surfaced from whatever procedure he was
concentrating on, he heard her again. I think we should get married.

Crazy! He felt a sensation oddly akin to panic clutch at his chest as he
parked in his driveway and walked up the front walk of his home. It was
a beautiful old brick manor house in the small town of Quartz Forge,
just minutes from the Michaux Forest and the Appalachian Trail. Kristin
had shared it with

14

her father until his sudden death from a heart attack nearly eight years
ago. Just like Mollie, her own mother had passed away when she was an
infant. After Paul Gordon had died, Kristin had claimed the place was
too big for just her, so he'd bought it from her at generous fair-market
value for the family he and Deb anticipated would fill it one day.
Kristin had protested the amount, but he'd been firm. It wasn't as if
he'd ever miss that amount of money, although Kristin didn't know that.
No one in Quartz Forge knew the extent of his personal fortune and he
was happy to keep it that way.

His personal fortune. The realization that he was a wealthy man-no, make
that a filthy-rich man-still didn't seem real. Thanks to his brother's
savvy dealings, the ten million he'd started with had increased
significantly just in the fifteen years he'd had it. Maybe, he thought,
he just didn't want it to be real. Because if it hadn't happened, his
parents would still be alive and enjoying their first and only grandchild.

He still could barely think of them. In one of the most improbable
scenarios ever, his parents had been swimming while on a second
honeymoon in the Caribbean when they had been struck by a young drunk
speedboat driver while Derek and his brother Damon were in high school.
It turned out their killer was a Saudi prince. The young man's father,
furious at his son's reckless behavior, settled a multimillion-dollar
sum on the two Mahoney brothers and nullified the prince's position as
his heir, elevating another of his sons instead. While it hadn't brought
back his parents

and it wasn't justice as Americans knew it, Derek imagined the
punishment was far more effective in the long run than the suspended
jail sentence the young man had received.

The heavy inner door opened while he was mounting the steps,
interrupting his morose thoughts. Mollie appeared behind the screen,
waving wildly. A moment later, Kristin appeared behind her. She glanced
at him, unsmiling, and then stepped back, eyes averted, as he opened the
door and walked inside.

"My daddy! My daddy!" Mollie chattered happily about her day as he swung
her up into his arms for a hug. An instant later she was squirming to be
set down, babbling something about Play-Doh that she apparently wanted
him to see. As she raced out of the front hallway, he risked a glance at
Kristin.

"Looks like you two had a fun afternoon. How long did she nap today?"

"Two hours." Kristin's voice was so carefully neutral that he could tell
without a doubt she was still angry. She was normally the most
expressive person he knew, her green eyes telegraphing joy or amusement
or outrage or whatever it was she was feeling. "She woke up about four."

He checked the hallway. Mollie still hadn't reappeared. "Um, Kris, about
what you said this morning?"

She didn't speak, only tilted her head and lifted her eyebrows in cool
query.

"It's just not that easy." She was studying a spot just beyond his left
shoulder and he had a shockingly

16

strong impulse to grab her and shake her until she looked at him.
""People don't just get married because it's convenient, or--or because
it would solve a few logistical problems. You're a great baby-sitter and
you know I'll never be able to thank you enough for the way you've
stepped in to help me raise Mollie, but-" he made a helpless gesture
"-that's no reason to try to force us into becoming a family."

There was a long silence in the hallway and he could hear his own
awkward words echoing around them. Finally, when she still didn't
respond, he demanded, "Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"

"Perfectly." Her voice was chilly. "You want to monopolize my life and
my youth because it's a convenient arrangement for you."

He was shocked. "That's not true!" Was it?

"Look, Derek." Kristin's face took on the mutinous expression he knew
from experience meant that he was going to have to use every trick in
the book to change her opinion. Her tone went from cool to heated. "This
isn't fair to me or to Molly. She's growing far too dependent on me.
You're setting yourself up for trouble when you do get married again
some day. She'll have a terrible time acclimating to a new mother."

"Dependent how?" The tone in her voice made him uneasy and he ignored
the rest of her words because he had no idea how to respond. Why did he
have to get married again? He was perfectly happy the way he was.

Or at least he had been. He wasn't sure where this was going but he was
fairly sure he wasn't going to like where it ended.

"She's been calling me Mommy. Not often, but sometimes it just slips
out. Given the amount of time we're together, it's probably natural-and
that's what I wanted to talk about." She took a deep breath and her
voice quavered. "I think you should find a new baby-sitter for Mollie."

He was stunned. No. not stunned. Sledgehammer-in-the-forehead totally
shocked. He couldn't even formulate an answer. At that moment, Mollie
came racing toward him again, demanding he see her artwork.

"There's a roast in the oven," Kristin said, "with carrots and potatoes.
Mollie's had plenty of fruit and vegetables today so she could have some
ice cream for dessert."

"You're not staying?" Kristin nearly always ate with them on weekday
evenings.

"No." She turned away and took her jacket from the knob of the hall
closet. "I've got some things to do this evening."

Darn Derek anyway!

The following afternoon, Kristin scowled at the columns of figures
before her, but she couldn't concentrate on the quarterly taxes she
should be completing for a local artist. Derek still thought of her as a
giddy teenager, she could tell. Why couldn't he see how much she had
changed and matured? He trusted

18

her to raise his daughter, but he couldn't believe she was grown-up.

Well, that was going to change. She was tired of being good old helpful
Kristin, part of the woodwork. Deb had died more than two years ago.

Sadness hovered, threatening to spirit away her righteous annoyance.
She'd loved Deb like a sister. And had Deb lived, Kristin would never
have acknowledged her own feelings for Derek as anything more than an
adolescent crush. But she wasn't a teenager anymore. She was a woman. A
woman who loved him deeply.

And he'd made it very clear today that he wasn't the least bit
interested in changing the way he viewed her.

She sighed. Was it so wrong of her to want a family of her own and a
love for the rest of her life? She was a good mother to Mollie and she
knew the little girl loved her. But that wasn't enough.

She squeezed her eyes tightly shut, stubbornly denying tears. She was
too practical to spend the rest of her life wishing for the moon. She
was twenty-five years old, and she'd barely even given other men a
second glance. All her life, she'd never been seriously attracted to
anyone else...because she compared them all to Derek. There had been
guys in college who had asked her out, but she hadn't been interested in
developing any relationships. She'd had one sexual encounter so tepid it
barely ranked as such.

And it was all Derek's fault. He still had been married then and she'd
never even entertained the thought that he might be hers someday. Even
so, he'd been the standard by which she'd judged other men, even if she
hadn't realized it at the time.

But then Deb had died. And gradually, she'd acknowledged that her
girlish love hadn't faded, hadn't died. It had simply matured into a
woman's love. Her heart ached to heal him, but he wouldn't let her get
close.

And Kristin wasn't going to spend the rest of her life waiting for Derek
to wake up. If he didn't want her, it was time to move on. Her heart
uttered a protest but she shushed it ruthlessly. Maybe there wasn't
another Derek Mahoney out there, but there were plenty of men, good men
who could love her, men with whom she could make a home and a family.

And if a corner of her heart would always belong to Derek, she would be
the only one to know or care.

Decision made, she nodded to herself, then picked up her pencil,
determined to accomplish something in the limited time she had. Mollie
still napped during the day and Kristin found the quiet afternoons were
one of her most productive times. The accounting work she did was
portable and she simply brought it along with her when she came to
Derek's house each afternoon.

It was a good arrangement. He dropped Mollie off in the morning. Kristin
fed her breakfast. At noon, they went back to Derek's house for lunch
and then Mollie napped while Kristin worked.

The only time it got a little hairy was during the

20

last frantic weeks of tax season, when she could work every hour of
every day if she chose, and sometimes took on more than she should. But
the money was good...and heaven knew she hadn't been in a position to
turn down extra income over the years since her father had died. Not
after the debts she'd discovered he'd left.

Actually, if she went to work full-time as an accountant, she would be
able to pay off the remainder of the debt in a year or so, rather than
the longer term she'd projected. That wouldn't be so bad, she encouraged
herself.

Yes, it had been a good arrangement that she and Derek had had. But it
was going to have to end.

Mollie woke shortly after four. Her schedule was fairly predictable
unless she was ill, and Kristin let her help make a meat loaf for the
evening meal. She had just taken the dish out of the oven at five-thirty
when the front door opened.

She heard Mollie's excited little voice as she chirped out the events of
her day. Sarge, the shepherd mix who accompanied Derek to the clinic
each day, came galloping down the hall with an exuberantly wagging tail
to greet her, and she cuddled the big dog for a moment before setting
his food bowl on the floor and leaving him to eat.

"...'n me 'n Mommy went to the libary 'n we went to the store 'n I taked
a nap-"

"You and Kristin," Derek corrected her.

"Yeah." The little girl was completely unfazed. "An' nen I played wif
Play-Don!"

Kristin smiled grimly to herself as she stuffed her work in her
briefcase and walked toward the front of the house. Had he thought she
was exaggerating about Mollie's new name for her?

Derek still stood in the foyer holding Mollie in his arms. His daughter
had his face sandwiched between her two tiny hands as she looked
intently into his eyes and Kristin's heart contracted at the sight of
the two dark heads so close together. Quietly, she picked up her jacket.
"Hi. I just took the meat loaf out so you can have dinner right away."

Derek stared at her, his blue eyes dark and shuttered. "You're not
eating with us again?"

"No. I have a board meeting tonight." Since she'd finished college,
she'd sat on the animal sanctuary's board of directors.

His eyebrows rose. "That doesn't start until seven. You have plenty of
time."

She couldn't hold the eye contact as she started around him, expecting
him to move out of her way. But he didn't move, and his broad shoulder
was too close to the door for her to pull it open. Taking a deep breath,
she met his gaze with a defiant one of her own. "No, thank you. Excuse me."

"Are you ever going to have supper with us again?" He moved aside, but
acted as if he hadn't even heard her and his tone was so aggressive she
nearly took a step back before she caught herself.

"I don't know," she said cautiously. This angry man wasn't a Derek with
whom she was familiar. He was normally one of the most unflappable
people she

22

knew. Of coarse, half the time he walked around in a fog, thinking about
something to do with the animals he treated, she thought tenderly. Then
she squelched her mental wanderings. Derek was still standing there
waiting for an answer. "Probably. Mollie's birthday is coming up in a
few months. I'll make something special for her that night."

"September! That's three months away." Both she and Mollie jumped when
he bellowed. Mollie immediately started to cry, and the anger in his
face turned to helpless concern as he rubbed her little back. "I'm
sorry, Munchkin. I didn't mean to scare you."

"D-daddy, don't yell at Kristin," Mollie said. She still had tears in
her eyes but the little treble voice was firm.

Derek's mouth dropped open. "She sounds just like you!" he said accusingly.

Kristin knew that wasn't a compliment but she wasn't prepared for the
hurt that sliced through her. Deb had been sweet and quiet and charming.
If she'd ever raised her voice or issued an ultimatum, Kristin couldn't
remember it and she sincerely doubted Deb had ever defied Derek in their
entire life together. She, Kristin, couldn't be more different from
Derek's beloved wife.

Leaning forward, she dropped a kiss on the little girl's forehead. "See
you tomorrow, honey," she murmured. The action brought her far too close
to Derek and she hastily pulled back and escaped before he could point
out any more of her deficiencies.

Her phone rang just as she was getting out of the shower that evening.
She wrapped a bath sheet around her and sprinted for her bedroom, where
the closest handset was. "Hello?"

"We have to talk," Derek said without preamble.

"There isn't anything to talk about."

"You know that's not true." he said. "Kris, you can't just cut yourself
out of Mollie's life so suddenly. She depends on you."

"It's not like I'm moving to California. I'll be two miles away."

"But she sees you almost every day."

"All right." She threw an exasperated hand into the air even though he
couldn't see her. "I'll come by a couple days a week and have lunch with
her after you get a new sitter." She made an effort to soften her tone.
"That way she won't feel like I'm abandoning her."'

"I wish you wouldn't do this." His voice was soft and persuasive.

She wavered, nearly succumbing to the plea. But then she recalled the
way he'd refused to take her seriously yesterday. "I have to," she said
equally softly. "I need to start living my own life, Derek. And so do you."

"What does that mean?" There was a note of suspicion in his tone now.

She sighed. What could she say that would persuade him to stop trying to
change her mind? "We spend far too much of our free time together."

24

"So?"

"So we each need to learn to live alone." "Yesterday you wanted to marry
me." "Yes," she said steadily, "I did." If he was trying to get her
goat, he was succeeding. "But you made your position crystal-clear so I
might as well accept it."

"I think you're punishing me for telling you no."

"I am not!" she said indignantly. "I just think it's time we all moved
on. Deb's been gone almost three years, and we've floated along in the
same arrangement we had before she died. It can't be good for any of us
and if it isn't going to be permanent, then we need to recognize that. I
want a family of my own someday and no man is going to be interested in
me as long as I'm so involved with you and Mollie." Lordy, she hoped he
didn't take that statement at more than face value. She was already
feeling humiliated enough without having him know that she had feelings
for him.

There was a heavy silence on the line and she held her breath. Derek
could barely stand to have his wife's name mentioned; how was he going
to react to that statement?

Then he sighed. "Maybe you're right," he said quietly. "It isn't fair of
me to monopolize you indefinitely. You've been so wonderful with Mollie
that it was easy for me to forget you have your own life to live."

"Thank you." She had to work to keep her throat from closing up. This
was a poor second-best option

if she couldn't have him. It was the hardest thing she'd ever had to do
in her entire life. "I have to go. See you Monday."

"Kris?" She loved the way he said her nickname. No one else had ever
called her that.

"Yes?"

"I don't want to lose touch. Promise me you won't dump us completely."

She laughed, perilously close to tears again. "I'd never do that. You
and Mollie are the only family I have."

There was a small, warm silence.

'"Night," she said.

'"Night." His voice was affectionate.

Slowly, she hung up the phone and sank down on the side of her bed,
heedless of the damp towel, fighting back the sobs that tightened her chest.

As she reached for a tissue, the phone rang again. She checked the
caller ID, tempted to ignore it, but when she recognized the voice of
the treasurer of the animal sanctuary's board, she thought she'd better
take it. The time was well past nine, not a usual time for him to be
calling. She hoped there wasn't a problem.

27

Two

She called Derek back moments later.

"Kris," he said patiently before she could get out a word. "I thought
we'd finished this discussion." Apparently he'd checked his caller ID as
well.

"Don't be an ass. I'm calling about something else." Her voice broke,
ruining the sharp retort.

"What's wrong?" His voice changed instantly. "Are you all right?"

She took a deep breath, striving for calm. "Cathie Balisle was killed in
a collision an hour ago."

"What?" Derek was instantly diverted from their personal exchange. "What
happened?"

Cathie Balisle was the executive director of the Appalachian Animal
Sanctuary. Kristin's father had hired her when he'd gotten a
million-dollar bequest

not long after the sanctuary had opened and she'd turned out to be a
perfect choice for the job. "Drunk driver," Kristin told him. "Rusty
Sheffield just called. I told him I'd call you."

"Man, that's bad news." She could picture him running a hand through his
hair like he always did when he was agitated, ruffling the dark waves
into disordered spikes. "I can't believe it."

"I know." Her throat felt too tight to speak. Although they hadn't been
close on a personal basis, Cathie and she had worked on AAS projects
together many times, and Cathie had been her father's choice to head the
sanctuary. "All that energy and drive, just-just gone."

Derek exhaled heavily. "What's the board going to do?"

"I doubt anyone's even thought about that yet," she said, "but I imagine
we'll advertise immediately. Interview and hire as fast as we possibly
can." The sanctuary was a large facility with a big budget and constant
management issues. They couldn't afford to be without an executive director.

"Let me know as soon as you hear when the funeral is. We'll get a sitter
for Mollie so we both can go." Derek's deep voice was compassionate.

Wryly, she noted that he apparently had forgotten what she'd said about
separating their lives, but she didn't have the energy to battle with
him right now. "Okay."

"Thanks for calling. Keep me posted." Derek had taken Paul Gordon's seat
on the board until Kristin

28

had finished college and had time to fill the vacancy. Although he was
no longer directly involved in that end of things he still liked to keep
abreast of the sanctuary's agenda.

The following day, Kristin learned that Cathie's funeral was scheduled
for two days later at eleven in the morning.

When she called to tell him, Derek said, "I'll close the clinic for a
few hours. Sandy says she'll come over to the house and watch Mollie
while we're gone."

"Tell her thank you," Kristin offered.

"I'll just bring her over when I pick you up at ten-thirty."

She hesitated, thinking of her new resolve. "That's not necessary." He
was silent for a moment. "This isn't the time for prickly independence,
Kris," he said quietly. "We do this kind of stuff together-'"

Funerals, he meant. As they'd done first her father's, and then his
wife's. Together. Suddenly, it occurred to her that the funeral of a
young woman might be difficult for him. "All right," she said, her heart
aching for him.

Kristin hadn't stayed for dinner any night since she'd issued that
ultimatum. Despite that, Derek was all too aware that she still made
sure there was a hot meal waiting for Mollie and him at the end of the
day when he came home.

He used to look forward to getting home, to having

Mollie run into his arms while he and Kristin traded smiles as she
babbled about her day. To sitting on the stool in the kitchen with
Mollie on his lap while he told Kris about his day, to her reactions to
everything from animals he'd been unable to save to owners who thought
he was crazy to bill them for certain services. This week, he'd been
called out of bed in the middle of the night to try to save a dog who'd
been hit by a car while running loose. The dog died, and the owners
couldn't understand why he billed them. He'd had to take Mollie to the
spare bedroom at the clinic until Kristin arrived to get her. Then he'd
had to call his surgical technician to come in, and they had worked for
three hours and administered several bags of IV fluids before the dog
finally succumbed to shock.

But Kristin hadn't heard that story, because she hadn't stuck around to
talk since Tuesday. Dinner was on the table when he arrived and she was
out the door before he even had his coat off. He'd eaten alone with
Mollie-which wasn't a bad thing, he hastened to assure himself. It was
just that he'd gotten used to the adult companionship.

And if he was honest, he missed her. He was actually looking forward to
Cathie's funeral today because he would have some time to talk to Kris.

But when he picked her up for the funeral, she was unusually quiet.
Despite the warmth of the early June morning, she was wearing a black
pantsuit with a matching jacket and her oval face was unreadable. This
was probably hitting her hard. Cathie had known

30

Kris's dad, in a way had been one of the few remaining links to her past.

He held the car door for her and then went around to his own seat. As
they drove toward the funeral home, she was still quiet.

"How was your morning?" he asked.

That elicited a brief smile. "Fine. I took Mollie to play with the
Mothers of Preschoolers group at the Methodist church. She's in love
with Jethrup Sowers's little boy. They walked around holding hands the
whole time."

He chuckled. "Sounds like more fun than mine. Three overweight,
geriatric dachshunds whose owner doesn't understand why they're having
back trouble, a macaw who's plucking her own feathers and a Yorkie with
a broken leg."

"How did it get broken?"

"Stepped on."

Silence.

Derek felt like a fidgety fourth-grader again as he braked for a red
light. "Has the board spoken at all about hiring someone to-to replace
Cathie?" He felt crass, voicing the thought aloud but Cathie had loved
the sanctuary and he knew she'd be concerned if she were in their position.

"No- Not yet." Kris was gazing out the window. Her hands lay limply in
her lap and without thinking he reached over and put one of his atop them.

The moment he touched her he knew it was a mistake. Dammit! All these
years they'd been friends, and ever since she'd said what she'd said,
he'd been

more aware of her physically than he had any woman since...since he was
young. Her hands were warm, her skin silky, and he resisted the fierce
urge to smooth his thumb across the tender flesh. If her hands were that
silky-cut it out, Derek.

Kris hadn't moved a muscle since he'd touched her. Now, she looked down
at her lap, where his much larger hand easily covered both her dainty
ones. His fingers actually curled around and under hers and he could
feel the give of her thigh, soft and very warm, beneath the backs of his
fingers.

She lifted her head and looked at him and he felt as if he'd been hit in
the stomach, breathless, gasping for air. Her eyes were as green as
emeralds sparkling in sunshine, soft and vulnerable, and a bolt of
intense sexual attraction shot through him with the unexpected ferocity
of a clap of summer thunder.

"Stop it," he said harshly, barely aware of the words. He pulled his
hand away as if touching her would blister his skin.

Her eyebrows rose in bewilderment. "Stop what?"

"Stop teasing me." The instant he said it, he knew it was unfair, but he
was too stirred up to retreat. In some weird way, he wanted to have a
rip-roaring right with her.

"Teasing you?" She repeated the words as if they were in a foreign
language. Then he saw fire kindle in her eyes. "Teasing you! I was doing
nothing of the kind." She sucked in a breath of outrage. "You were the
one who touched me!"

"I'm not talking about touching." Although he'd

32

probably give up the deed to his home if he could put his hands on that
yielding, tender flesh again. "I'm talking about the come-hither looks."
The light finally changed and he started through the intersection. The
church was only two blocks away.

"The..." Her voice trailed off into silence. "What on earth is the
matter with you? I wouldn't know how to give a "come-hither look' if my
life depended on it."

He was dreadfully regretting his words, aware that he wasn't exactly
acting rationally, but the steady increase in arousal he was
experiencing, a longing that only grew sharper as the tension grew
between them, prevented him from admitting it. Staring through the front
windshield, he concentrated on his driving.

Beside him. Kristin made a small motion of frustration that he caught in
his peripheral vision. "You," she said in a controlled, precise tone,
"are a jerk."

And those were the last words spoken. He parked at the church and she
was out of the car and stalking across the parking lot before he could
come around to get her door. He took long strides to catch up with her
although she completely ignored him, signing her name in the register
and slipping into a seat near the back of the quiet room. He took the
seat beside her, and she made a production out of moving over so that
her body didn't brush his.

Hell. What was he going to do about Kristin? Nothing. She's too young
for you. But ever since she'd mentioned marriage and he'd begun to think of

her as a woman rather than the girl he'd felt responsible for for the
past eight years, he hadn't been able to ignore her lithe figure.

The funeral service began then, and he tuned in with relief, shoving
aside his troubled thoughts. Most of the board members of the animal
sanctuary were (here, as were employees and a lot of other local people
who had come to know Cathie through her skillful fund-raising efforts.
He'd closed his clinic, and Faye was there as well, along with several
other members of the staff.

Beside him, he was aware that Kristin was crying quietly as the minister
delivered a touching eulogy, Fishing in his pocket, he offered her his
handkerchief, but she studiously ignored him and pulled a tissue from
her own pocket. He wanted badly to put his arm around her and offer her
comfort-but he suspected that after the way he'd behaved, she'd chew off
his arm at the shoulder. Instead, all he could do was watch her from the
corner of his eye. He could practically feel the control she exerted to
quiet herself.

By the time the service ended, she was calm again. They made the short
ride to the cemetery in utter silence and joined the other mourners for
the brief graveside service. Afterward, Kristin stepped forward to speak
briefly to Cathie's parents. He did the same, but then got caught by one
of the animal sanctuary's board members who asked him in a quiet
undertone if he had any suggestions for a replacement for

34

Cathie. He shook his head and hurried to catch up with Kris.

As he came up behind her near the car, he realized she was crying again.
She wept silently, her slender shoulders shaking and he stood there
awkwardly, wondering what to do. He clenched his fists to prevent
himself from reaching out and touching her. But after a moment, he
couldn't take the quiet sobbing anymore and he raised his arms and
slipped them around her, pulling her close.

She burrowed against him instantly like a small creature seeking shelter
from harm, her arms tightening around his waist. But almost as instantly
she stiffened in his arms. "I'm not teasing you." Her voice was muffled
in his chest.

A wave of tenderness surged through him and he stroked a hand down her
back. "I know. I'm sorry for that...earlier. I was just in a filthy mood."

She didn't reply, but her body relaxed against his, and she let him hold
her.

It was a mistake again, touching her, but at least this time he was
prepared for the rush of awareness that tightened his gut and made his
whole body feel hot and tingly. He bent his head and brushed his lips
over the crown of her head. "I'm sorry. I know you really liked Cathie."

She nodded. "I did." He could feel her warm breath through his
summer-weight shirt and an involuntary shiver chased down his spine.
"Daddy chose her, you know."

He nodded, understanding her grief. "I know. Brings it all back, doesn't
it?"

She nodded.

Over her head, he saw Faye walking along the edge of the narrow road
that wound through the cemetery. As she picked her way around his car,
her gaze met his, and she gave him a smug, knowing smile.

He stifled a ridiculous urge to stick his tongue out at her and helped
Kristin into the car. As he drove her home again, he clung to denial: a
marriage between them was a ludicrous thought. She was young, fresh. He
was a widower with a child. Their personalities didn't mesh in any way
as his had with Deb's. They'd fight. It would never work.

The next day was her Saturday to volunteer at the animal sanctuary. She
dressed in baggy khaki shorts and a comfortably oversize T-shirt,
grabbed a toaster pastry and reached for her car keys. The whole time
she was getting ready, she was worrying at the problem of finding a new
executive director, mentally writing an ad to place.

But when she opened her door, Faye Proctor stood on the other side.
Kristin nearly barreled into her, jolting to a halt with a gasp of surprise.

Faye put a hand to her throat and chuckled. "Lordy, you startled me!"

"You startled me, too." She opened the door and gestured for Faye to
enter. "Come on in. I have to help at Appalachian today but I have a few
minutes. What's up?"

36

Faye sank onto the couch in Kristin's small living room and Kristin took
a seat opposite her. When their eyes met, Faye's usually cheerful gaze
was surprisingly sober. "Derek told me about your suggestion last week."

Great. If a person could vanish in a puff of smoke, Kristin fervently
wished it would happen right now. This very moment. She squeezed her
eyes tightly shut, feeling heat creep into her face, but when she opened
them, Faye was still there, gazing patiently at her.

"Oh," said Kristin weakly. "That...rat."

Faye laughed. "I betcha 'rat' isn't the word you really want to use!"

"Well, no," she said, smiling a little, "it's not."

"I don't mean to pry," Faye assured her. "The thing is, I agree with
you, honey."

Kristin stared at the older woman, speechless. She did?

"Dr. Mahoney's a great boss," Faye said, "and I love working for him.
But it's been hard to watch him shut himself away from everything but
that little girl since dear Debbie died. You're all that's kept him from
folding his tents completely-"

"I don't know about that," Kristin interrupted.

"I do," Faye said. "You make him eat and go to work. You help with his
housework and do his laundry. You've raised Miss Mollie, don't think you
haven't."

"That may be true, but as Derek pointed out to me, those aren't reasons
to get married." She

shrugged, trying to stave off the hurt the memory

produced. They'd patched up their disagreement, if that was what that
odd, charged exchange in which he'd accused her of teasing him had been,
but there had been an uncomfortable strain between them that had
lingered until she'd thanked him for the ride and slid out of his car.

Faye snorted. "That man can't see his nose on his own darn face. Don't
you pay him any mind."

Kristin tilted her head. "What do you mean?"

"Any fool can see you care about Dr. Mahoney," said Faye.

"Is it that obvious?" She was dismayed.

"No, no," said Faye hastily. "But I've known you since you were a little
girl and I've never seen you look at a man the way you look at Derek
when he isn't looking back."

Kristin felt herself flushing. "So?" She didn't mean to be rude. She'd
known Faye long enough to know the older woman wouldn't take offense.

"So you've never listened to him before," Faye said, grinning. "You
aren't going to start now, are you?"

Well. She had a point. But still... "Yes." She made her voice firm. "I'm
not going to live the rest of my life wishing for something I can't
have. If Derek doesn't want me, I'm going to open myself to other
possibilities."

"You mean other men?" Faye's eyes were wide.

Kristin nodded.

"Don't be hasty, honey. You dragged him back

38

from the edge of climbing into that grave with Deb," Faye reminded her.
"He didn't know what was good for him, and he still doesn't."

"But..." She was at a loss as to how to handle this strange
conversation. "How am I supposed to...what can I do when he says-"

"Feminine wiles." Faye smiled meaningfully. She tapped a brown shopping
bag she'd brought in and set on the floor beside her. "I've got a few
things in here that my daughter Carlie can't wear since she had the
baby. We're going to make you look more like a woman."

"More like a woman?" She fingered the mass of shining curls that fell
over her shoulder. "I don't think I exactly resemble a guy."

"No," Faye agreed. "You sure don't. We're just going to remind Dr.
Mahoney a little bit."

"How?" Kristin asked suspiciously. "I don't want to have to wear a bunch
of makeup-"

"Honey, with that face and hair you don't need makeup!" Faye stood up
and shook out something in a pretty shade of teal that she'd pulled from
the bag. "But your clothes are another matter."

"I like to be comfortable." What did she mean about the face and hair?
The face was too pale, even if she did have pretty eyes, and her
hair...the color was nice, but the wild curls refused to be tamed. If
she cut it short, it would only form a frizzy halo, so she wore it long
and usually braided it or pulled it back.

"You like to hide," Faye corrected. "You won't

be uncomfortable in these things, but you'll be noticed, that's for sure."

The teal fabric was a slinky knit dress, sleeveless and scoop-necked.
There were several little sleeveless tops, a pair of well-worn jeans and
a denim skirt that didn't look big enough to cover her butt.

"The dress is for evening," Faye told her. "Try this stuff. Once you've
gotten used to it, we'll go shopping and get you some things of your own
to match the new you."

"I can't afford to go shopping." That was true. Her father had poured
all his money into establishing Appalachian and had been heavily in debt
when he died. Although at seventeen she technically still had been a
minor, it had never occurred to her to default on the loans he had made.
The money she'd gotten from Derek for the house and the practice had
gone a long way toward erasing what she owed, but she still had a heavy
schedule of loan payments to make for another year. She could hardly
wait until the loan was paid off. Then she could start saving for a
house of her own.

"Secondhand shops and Goodwill," Faye said. "I've gotten some great
stuff there." She shoved the bag into Kristin's hands. "Now go try on
these things."

Faye was a force of nature when she was on a mission and Kristin knew
better than to argue. If she hurried, she wouldn't be too late.

Everything fit like a dream. And that was a problem. She was used to
wearing loose, baggy clothing.

40

She couldn't even remember the last time she'd worn a skirt and she felt
disconcertingly exposed. Even to church, she wore one of two trouser
suits she'd had for years.

"I can't go out in public in this," she said as she came out of the half
bath off her small kitchen. "This" was the teal dress. It was
deceptively simple on a hanger, but on a body... she was afraid she
might just be illegal.

"You look terrific!" Faye crowed, walking all around her. "What's the
matter?"

"It's..." She motioned vaguely. "Too revealing."

"It's modest compared to what some girls are wearing these days. Go try
the rest."

Faye approved each of the other items, but when Kristin attempted to
change back into her own clothing, the older woman shook her head. "Just
wear that today."

Kristin looked down at herself. She was wearing the jean skirt with a
spring-green camisole top. The top had a tiny drawstring bow made of
ribbon at the rounded neckline, and ribbon was laced through the straps
as well. The only saving grace was that she could still wear her bra.
"Isn't it a little bare?"

"No. It's summery and feminine. That skirt looks a whole lot better on
you than those baggy drawers you've been wearing. And wear your hair
down." Faye walked around behind her and slipped the loose fabric twist
free.

"But it gets in my way."

"Then cut it."

"No!" Kristin put a protective hand to her head. Then she saw Faye's
lips twitch and she smiled reluctantly. "Okay. I'll wear it down. It is
pretty like this, isn't it?"

"It's beautiful, honey," Faye said gently. "And so are you. Now go to
Appalachian and enjoy the compliments you get."

"All right," she said doubtfully. She probably wouldn't see many people
today, anyway. What was the harm? "I'll try it today. But I'm not
promising any drastic wardrobe changes."

"It's a deal," said Faye.

"But Faye...I'm not doing this for Derek." On that point she was
certain. "I'm doing it for me. If he's not interested, maybe I'll find
someone who is."

The older woman just nodded and smiled. "Either way, you're bound to get
some reaction."

But from whom? Kristin said farewell to Faye and climbed into her small
truck, hoping she wouldn't be too late. She did whatever was needed, but
most often she worked the desk because Cathie said she was so good with
the public.

Her eyes closed briefly in sadness as she thought of Cathie. And then
they sprang open again. The public! How had she forgotten? Today was
Summerfest, an annual fund-raising and public relations event the animal
sanctuary held each June. They'd considered postponing it after Cathie
died, but it was too big an event. And in any case, Cathie wouldn't have
wanted that. Summerfest had been her brainstorm originally. The best way
to honor her, the board members had

42

decided, was to carry out the event she had organized.

There would be a skillion visitors, not to mention media attendees, all
over the public areas. And here she was, dressed like a refugee from an
'NSYNC concert.

43

Three

It was a beautiful day for Summerfest. The sun shone brightly but there
was a hint of breeze and the temperature hovered in the upper seventies
just before noon. As Derek lifted Mollie from her car seat, he noticed
that there was a sizable crowd milling around the sanctuary parking lot,
where many different kinds of booths and activities were set up beneath
nearby shade trees.

In the center of the lot, a local dog club had set up an agility course
and members were demonstrating their dogs1 skills on various pieces of
equipment. A schedule prominently posted near the refreshment tables
displayed times for demonstrations of such varied animal events as guide
dog puppy raisers, a bird breeder with her talking parrots, a detection dog

44

team who searched for drugs and a woman who rescued orphaned bear cubs.
Pony rides were offered in a nearby meadow as well as guided tours of
the sanctuary.

Derek had just set Mollie on her feet when she gave a piercing squeal.
"Mom-meeeee!" He grabbed her just as she nearly made a mad dash across
the parking lot.

"Whoa, there, chickadee."

"Down. Daddy!" His daughter was a wriggling bundle of feminine outrage.
"I wanna go see Mommy."

He tried to keep the frustration he felt from his voice as he said,
"Kristin's not your mommy, Mollie. She's our friend."

He glanced at the crowd, his pulse quickening, but he didn't see her.
and he decided Mollie must have been mistaken. But as he reached the
edge of the asphalt where the frenzy of the celebration was in full
swing, his gaze caught a flash of white blond curls. He lifted his head
in time to see Kristin standing in front of the animal sanctuary office
with two of the board members.

Only...was it Kristin? She wore a skirt-Kris never wore skirts. And not
just any skirt. A short denim skirt that hugged her slender hips and
showed an indecent amount of long, bare leg. With it she wore an equally
skimpy little tank top of some clingy fabric that displayed feminine
curves he'd had no real idea she possessed. Well, he supposed he had,
but he'd just never thought about her that way... until last week. Now
it seemed to be all he could think about.

He surveyed her again, his pulse kicking up a notch. Good lord. It was a
wonder every man in the place hadn't had a heart attack if she'd been
walking around like that all morning. Her hair was down- what was with
that?-spilling down her back and curling around her shoulders like a
caressing hand. Loose tendrils floated in the breeze. As he watched, a
strand wafted across the face of the man to her left and he caught it
with a smile, tugging playfully as Kristin tried to restrain the rest.

The half-breathless feeling inside him vanished and he felt like snarling.

Mollie tugged at his hand again. "Wanna go see Kristin."

"Okay." He released her hand and followed more slowly, watching as his
daughter made a beeline through the crowd. The buzz of voices around him
made it impossible to hear, but he knew the moment Kristin saw Mollie.
Her pretty face lit up in a spontaneous expression of delight and she
knelt, stretching out her arms.

In the instant before Mollie ran into her embrace, he couldn't help
noticing how the position pulled Kristin's skirt high up her thighs,
exposing a tantalizing triangle of shadow between her legs. He couldn't
see panties, but he might as well have been able to.

A surge of arousal so strong he actually stopped in his tracks slammed
into him. God, she was lovely.

46

Why hadn't he noticed before? You did, he reminded himself. You've
always thought Paul's daughter would grow into a beautiful woman someday.

The trouble was, "someday" had apparently arrived while he wasn't looking.

He forced himself to start forward again, trying to get his raging
hormones under control. The last thing he needed was for Kristin to
think he had the hots for her. It would totally destroy the friendly
family relationship they'd always had.

Yeah, Like you didn't do that when you accused her of teasing you. What
an idiot.

"Dr. Mahoney. Glad you could come by." The older of the two men still
flanking Kristin thrust out a hand. Walker Glave was a local attorney
who served as the sanctuary board's president and donated his time when
they had legal issues with wills and trusts to work out.

"I wouldn't miss it." Derek shook the hand, then squatted down in front
of his daughter and Kristin. "Sorry. She saw you the moment we arrived."

"Don't be sorry. I'm delighted to see my Miss Mollie." She spoke to the
child rather than to him, tweaking her nose playfully as Mollie giggled.

Derek leaned forward a little, speaking in an undertone. "You might
consider changing that position before every man here gets a look
beneath your skirt."

Her gaze flew to his as her eyes widened, and a red patch of color
appeared in each cheek. Hastily, she stood, lifting Mollie into her
arms. "Come on,

Mols. Let's go get some lemonade and let Daddy visit for a while."

"Not too long," he said to her back as she started away. "I'm serious
about not monopolizing your day." She didn't answer, but he was sure
she'd heard him, and he made himself a mental note to try to keep track
of the time. That wasn't his strong suit.

"Hey, Doc." The younger, taller man extended a hand. An insurance
salesman with a busy office in Quartz Forge, Rusty Sheffield currently
was the treasurer of the board. "Good to see you. We miss having you on
the board." He turned to eye Kris's back view as she walked away.
"Although having Kristin there isn't exactly a hardship."

"Kristin may not be on the board if she accepts the offer," Walker said.

"What offer?" Derek told himself he only was annoyed by Rusty's leering
expression because of the promise he'd made her father always to look
out for her.

"We've asked her to consider temporarily filling the executive
director's position," Rusty said.

Derek was too surprised to speak.

"What do you think about it?" Rusty pressed.

"I-ah, I don't know." He made an effort to gather his thoughts.

"We'd be taking away his baby-sitter," the older board member said.
"What do you expect him to say?"

"No, it's not that," he said hastily. "It's just that I never thought of
Kristin as..."

48

"Neither did we," Walker said. "But the minute someone mentioned her, we
couldn't think of a single reason why we wouldn't want her. She'll be
terrific."

Derek couldn't think of a single reason he wouldn't want her, either,
but he doubted they were speaking of the same thing. God. why couldn't
he seem to get his mind off sex today? Slowly, he nodded as he forced
his attention back to the men and considered the idea. Why hadn't she
talked to him about it? He winced inwardly, recalling again his behavior
the day of the funeral. He knew exactly why, and he forced himself to
consider her in terms of the position. "She'll do an excellent job for you."

"Temporarily," said Walker. "Just for a few-months until we can
interview and hire the right person. You know that handling a nonprofit
of this size is no easy task."

"If Kristin does take the job," Rusty said, "we'd like you to come back
and fill her spot on the board. Other than Kristin, you're the closest
thing to Paul Gordon's family, and you knew his wishes."

"I'll have to think about it," he said, "but thank you for the offer."

"Dr. Mahoney!" A chubby woman in a pink, flowered dress sailed toward
them. "How nice to see you. I wanted to thank you again for all you did
for Apricot. Her allergies seem to be under control now and her coat is
growing in as beautifully as it was before."

Derek pasted on a smile and turned to his client. The only trouble with
being a vet in a small town

was that his clients were everywhere. And they all assumed he was
waiting breathlessly to hear about their pet's latest health crises. He
loved animals, and he loved his job, but it surely would be nice to go
out in public sometime and have someone ask his opinion on who should be
baseball's MVP or how his newest woodcarving effort was coming.

Two hours later, he was still being held captive by clients talking
about their pets when he heard Kristin's voice. "Derek? It's time to
eat." She smiled at the couple currently regaling him with tales of
their Jack Russell. "Sorry. I'm the spoilsport who makes sure Dr.
Mahoney takes a break every now and then."

"Thank you." he said beneath his breath as he followed her to a table
where apparently she'd already gotten two plates of food. "In my
nightmares sometimes, I'm surrounded by people telling pet stories and I
can't get away."

She smiled, swiping back a curling lock of hair that the breeze had
caught. "I thought you were starting to look a little desperate."

He sat gratefully, checking his heaping plate. "Yum. Deviled eggs and
brownies. You must have been near the front of the line. The eggs are
always gone by the time I get there." He glanced around, parental unease
rearing its head. "Where's Mollie?"

She pointed to the wide grassy yard where a group of teenagers were
organizing children's games and he spotted his daughter. "One of the
girls is keeping an eye on Mollie for a little while."

50

"Thanks." He waited until she took a seat beside him, then began to eat,
realizing only as he surveyed the rest of the items on his plate that
Kristin had chosen just about every one of his favorites from the buffet
tables. A different sort of uneasiness snaked through him. Did she
really know him that well? He had a sneaking suspicion she did.

"Did Walker and Rusty tell you about the offer they made me?" Her voice
broke into his thoughts.

He nodded. "They did. What do you think?"

She hesitated. "I don't know. It's temporary, and this is a good time of
year for me, since my accounting work won't really pick up until winter
sets in. I think it would be challenging and interesting, but..."

"But what?"

She shrugged. "I'm just not sure." She set down her spoon and looked at
him. "Do you think I should take it?"

"Do I want you to take it or do I think you should take it?" He forced
himself to grin. "I don't want you to take it because you've been a
terrific babysitter and Mollie depends on you. But since you've already
said you're leaving anyway, yes, I think you should take it. You're
organized, creative, good with people and budget-conscious. I think
you'd be great at it."

She looked a little stunned. "Thank you," she finally said.

When she didn't speak again, he glanced at her around a mouthful of
brownie. "Did I say something

wrong?" he asked. Heaven only knew what was going through that
convoluted brain of hers.

"No." She smiled, delicately licking brownie icing from the lip of one
finger with a pink tongue. "It's just...well, you're not big on
compliments. It's nice to know you think I'm so capable."

He didn't answer her. Hell, he barely heard her. Every cell in his body
was focused on that sweet little tongue as she finished her brownie and
licked the rest of the icing from her fingers. God, what would he give
to have that tongue licking him.

He was still watching her when she picked up her napkin and wiped her
fingers. She glanced at him. "Are you...finished?" Her voice stuttered
and faded as their eyes met. And held.

They stared across the table at each other and he knew from the rising
awareness in her eyes that she recognized the hunger he couldn't hide.
Finally, she tore her gaze from his and hastily began to gather plates
and utensils together. "We'd better clean up and make space for someone
else."

He put out a hand and caught her wrist in a loose, yet unbreakable grip.
"Kris."

She stilled.

"You look pretty today." He hadn't intended to say the words, but he
found he wasn't sorry he'd spoken.

"Th-thank you."

She'd never made much effort with her clothes and looks before. Despite
the fact that she was a truly lovely girl, she'd camouflaged herself so
well that

52

she'd gone virtually unnoticed by men. But since she'd begun her
campaign to get his attention, he figured she'd decided to use her
assets-and as far as he was concerned, she'd done a hell of a job. "Any
special reason you dressed up?" he asked with a smile.

But the moment he spoke, her eyes went flat. The warmth and attraction
in her gaze vanished so completely it was as if it had never existed.
She tugged at her wrist until he let go. "I don't want to be an old
maid," she said quietly. "From now on, I'm not going to hide when a man
shows interest in me, and I'm not going to hide myself, either."

He didn't like the sound of that and he frowned. "A man like Rusty
Sheffield? Did he ask you out?"

She shrugged. "It's really not your business."

The hell it wasn't. "He's too immature for you."

Her eyebrows rose. "He's four years older than I am! That's hardly
immature."

"He's been through practically every single woman in town. Do you want
to be the subject of the weekly barbershop gossip?"

"It would be better than never being noticed at all," she shot back. She
looked angry now. "Rusty's too immature and you're too old. You're not
leaving me much of a window of opportunity here, Derek."

He wanted to shake her. He wanted to grab her and kiss her until she
quit talking, and the only thing that saved her-and him-was the table
between them. "I just don't want to see you get hurt." It was part of
the truth, at least.

"Oh, get over yourself," she snapped. "You haven't been my guardian for
eight years now." And before he could speak again, she snatched up a
handful of dirty dishes and stalked off toward the trash can, her long
legs eating up the ground as she moved away from him.

Wearily, he ran a hand through his hair. What was the matter with him?
Every time he was around her these days, he seemed to provoke an
argument. He really hadn't intended to make her mad. He just didn't want
her going out with some jerk that might use her and hurt her.

Right. You want her for yourself and you just can't admit it.

There's nothing to admit, he defended himself staunchly to the inner
voice that shouted for his attention. She's like my family. I have to
look out for her.

Since when does looking out for her include drooling over her legs and
her lips?

He didn't have an answer for that one.

The last few weeks of June were hectic.

Kristin informed him on the Monday after Summerfest that the day care
right down the street from his practice had an opening in Mollie's age
group, and that she could start as soon as he visited and filled out the
paperwork.

Hell, she even filled it out and brought it to him, then stood over him
while he signed his name and date in the appropriate places. She
couldn't have

54

made it clearer that she was eager to ditch Mollie and him.

It wasn't that he objected to day care. In fact, he'd been reluctant to
leave Mollie alone with a stranger in the house all day anyway. At day
care, she'd be with experienced professionals and she'd have other kids
to play with.

But still...he hadn't said any of that to Kristin before she shoved
those papers down his throat.

She started working at the animal sanctuary on Wednesday, the same day
he dropped Mollie off at day care for the first time. Mollie seemed
happy enough, and he went to work feeling less guilty than he'd expected.

The feeling lasted until he picked her up in the evening, and found her
in one of the helper's arms, sobbing her little heart out.

"Daddy." She scrambled for him the moment he entered the room and he
bent to lift her into his arms, feeling his own heart crack as he
surveyed her tear-stained cheeks and the thumb in her mouth, something
she rarely did anymore unless she was really tired or stressed.

"Hi, chickadee." He tried to inject a positive note into his voice. "Did
you have a good time today?"

She shook her head slowly from side to side.

"Aw, Mollie, we had a lot of fun this morning!" The aide, a relentlessly
cheerful older woman, beamed as she came over to address them. "You'll
have to tell Daddy about finger painting and our Richie Raccoon story
time. And don't forget tomorrow is Share It Day. Bring something blue
from home to tell your friends about during Share It."

Blue?

The woman smiled at him. "We're working on the color blue this week, so
everyone is bringing in a blue Share It."

He nodded. "What happened.,.?" He indicated his daughter, who had
wrapped her arms around his neck and laid her head on his shoulder, and
just that fast, was sound asleep.

The woman's smile wilted a little. "She didn't nap today. She kept
saying she needed her hair. Is there a special doll or blanket she
sleeps with?"

Derek shook his head, puzzled. "No, not really."

"Well, don't worry too much," the aide advised. "The first few days are
always an adjustment for the little ones. I'm sure she'll be fine in no
time."

Mollie didn't wake up even when he put her in her car seat, and he had
to work to get her awake enough to eat dinner. She livened up around
bath time and began to chatter about her day, and when bedtime rolled
around, she was still wide-awake and totally wired.

When Kristin called, he was at his wit's end.

"Hi," she said, and he could hear a cool note in her voice. "I just
called to see how Mollie's first day went. I promised to stop in at
lunch a few days a week but I figured I'd better wait a day or two until
she gets into a routine and doesn't think I've come to pick her up."

He sighed. "It didn't go so well."

56

"Oh, no. What happened?" As Mollie squealed happily in the background,
Kristin said, "What is she doing still up? She needs to be in bed by
eight or she'll be awful tomorrow."

"I know," he said defensively, "but she wouldn't nap for them today and
she fell asleep on the way home and now she's got her second wind."

Kristin was silent and he could feel the censure right through the
receiver. But when she spoke, she didn't sound like she was condemning
him. "Did they say why she wouldn't sleep?"

"Something about needing her hair," he reported. "I don't get it. She
doesn't sleep with a blanket or a doll-"

"It's my hair," Kristin said flatly. "Shoot. I'm sorry. I never thought
to tell you. I used to sit with her in my lap after lunch. I'd read a
story and then put her down for her nap. She takes a handful of my hair
and brushes it back and forth over her cheek and it puts her right to
sleep."

Oh, man. Now that she'd said it, he knew exactly what she meant. He'd
seen Mollie doing it on more than one occasion but since he'd never had
trouble getting her to sleep for him, he'd never connected the dots.
"Well, hell," he said in disgust. "What am I going to tell the day care?
I don't guess you'd be able to-"

"I can't go over there every day and put her down for her nap," Kristin
said briskly. "Even if they'd allow it, I'm not going to have time. The
sanctuary is in an uproar right now and I'm going to have work coming
out my ears."

"Sorry," he said immediately, meaning it. "I didn't really expect you
to. Any suggestions?"

There was a short silence. "I'll tell you what," she said. "How about if
I meet you there in the morning. I'll let Mollie cut a lock of my hair
and we'll tie it up and keep it in a bag so that at nap time she can get
it out and keep it with her."

"You can't cut your hair!" He was truly shocked.

She laughed. "Just a little piece from underneath. Derek, you know how
much hair I have. I'll never even know it's gone."

Oh, he knew exactly. Hadn't he been having dreams of that moon-silvered
mass of curls sliding over his body? Belatedly, he realized she was
awaiting a response. "Uh, that would be terrific," he said. "If you're
sure you don't mind."

"Not at all." Her voice was brisk again. "See you in the morning."

She was as good as her word the following day, although he was
disappointed that she didn't linger a little longer. She was wearing
jeans today with a T-shirt, but they weren't the baggy pants she'd once
worn. These hugged her curves and emphasized the length of her legs. The
shirt, too, was different. He was used to seeing her in large, floppy
shirts-this one fit her snugly.

"Don't you have to dress up a little for work?" he asked her.

"Not today." She jingled her car keys, clearly

58

anxious to go. "I don't have any appointments today and one of the
kennel staff broke an arm yesterday, so until we find a temporary
replacement, I may have to help out in the kennels." She grinned. "One
thing's for sure-I'll never get bored doing the same old thing at this job."

Her words bothered him. "I'm sorry if baby-sitting was-""

"No. no." she said in exasperation. "I wasn't comparing the two. I only
meant this is nothing like having a dry old accounting practice all day
every day."

He felt better instantly, and as she walked back to her car, he couldn't
stop himself from checking out her back view. Damn. He shook his head,
his good mood evaporating. She was going to have men all over her.

Aside from thoughts of the way Kristin's hair swayed just above her
heart-shaped behind in the tight jeans, he had a good day at the clinic.
When he went to pick up Mollie, the aide reported that she'd had a
wonderful nap.

They fell into a passable routine. Kristin called every few days to see
how Mollie was and he knew from Mollie's chatter that she was stopping
by the day care, but he hadn't seen her in almost two weeks, since she'd
stopped to drop off a lock of her hair-God, he missed her. He missed the
indulgent glances they used to share at Mollie's antics. He missed
coming home to a lighted house and a hot meal, but even more, he missed
coming home to her

warm smile and the lazy discussions they'd had over dinner. He missed
drying dishes and ducking when she flicked a towel at him, he missed
seeing the tender way she kissed Mollie's temple, the way she always
took the time to kneel and rub Sarge's furry belly.

It was ridiculous. He'd allowed himself to slide along after Deb's
death, had allowed Kristin to do far too much to hold his family
together, had gotten far too accustomed to having her in his life. Now
he hated being alone without adult companionship. Without female
companionship, and one particular female at that.

When the phone rang on the last Friday in June, he leaped for it, his
spirits lifting as he glanced at the clock. Nine in the evening. Kristin
usually called about this time to see how they were doing.

"Hello?"

"Hi. Can I stop over?"

"Sure. Right now?" Sure! He'd love to see her.

"Yes. I have something I need to talk to you about." Her voice sobered
him. She didn't sound happy, and he racked his brain, wondering what was
wrong. Had he done something to upset her?

He had his answer in five minutes. He was watching for her car and he
opened the door before she even got to the porch.

"Hi."

"Hi." She stepped into the kitchen and she set down a large, handled
file box. "I need your opinion on something."

60

"Sure." He turned a chair backward and straddled it, facing her. "Sit
down and talk to me." He couldn't prevent the smile that crept across
his face. "It's good to see you."

She smiled back. "It's good to see you, too." The moment lingered, but
before it could turn into anything else, she shook herself and reached
for the box of files she'd brought along. "I think we may have a problem
at the sanctuary."

"What kind of problem?" He could probably deal with anything that came
up. He was familiar with personnel issues, scheduling, all the things
that went on in his office-

"Derek." she said, "I think something's wrong with the budget numbers.
There's a discrepancy in the books.'"

"A discrepancy?" He knew all about balancing budgets, but so did she, so
why would she come to him about something so mundane?

"Missing money." She swallowed, and as he realized she was upset, her
words began to assume meaning.

"As in, a deliberate discrepancy?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. But it's hard to imagine that half a
million dollars going missing is an accident."

"Half a million." He was too shocked to conceal it. "Five hundred
thousand dollars? Where'd it go?"

"If I knew that, it wouldn't be a discrepancy, would it?" Her voice was
just the slightest bit sarcastic. Immediately, she said, "I'm sorry. I know

how you feel. It's difficult to believe. When I first found it, I went
over every column of the books." She tapped the stack of files in the
box. "It went out, largely in small untraceable sums, but it never came
back in again."

He still couldn't grasp it. "Are you telling me you think Cathie took it?"

"I don't know what to think." Her voice was anguished. "But that's what
it's looking like."

"Good God." He sat back, and a heavy silence fell. Finally, he stirred.
"Well, what do we do? We can't ask her," he muttered.

"No." Kristin sounded close to tears. "But I absolutely don't want any
hint of this to get out and accusations to fly unless we're completely
certain that it's really missing and that Cathie had something to do
with it." She sniffed. "She loved the sanctuary. I can't believe she
would embezzle from us."

"Kris, honey, don't cry." Without thinking, he rose from his chair and
went to her, drawing her up and into his arms. "Let's double-check
everything. Maybe there's some explanation you just missed. You know how
it is when you're too close to the numbers."

She nodded into his chest. "Maybe that's it." Her arms tightened around
his waist. "Thanks. I knew you'd help."

"We'll figure it out together," he soothed. "You know you can come to me
with anything." She felt soft and feminine in his arms, her body warm
and giving against his, and without letting himself think

62

about whether or not it was wise or smart, he put a finger beneath her
chin and tilted her face up to his. "God, Kris, I've missed you so much."

And then her hands were sliding up into his hair and he set his lips on
hers, his whole body coming alive to the feel of hers as he tightened
his arms and pulled her more fully to him.

63

Four

It was the kind of kiss she'd dreamed of during countless lonely nights.
Derek's arms were around her, bringing her close enough to feel the
contours of his strong male frame. One was wrapped around her waist, the
other engulfed her shoulders and she could feel his large palms pressing
against her back.

She wasn't short, but Derek made her feel tiny and fragile. His dark
head blotted out the light as he bent to her and his shoulders seemed a
mile wide. His arms and chest were hard and roped with muscle from both
his weekly workouts and the hours he spent on the larger animals in his
practice. In a town as small as Quartz Forge, a vet couldn't be simply a
small-animal vet or an avian vet. Derek handled all the animals, farm,
pet and other, that came his way.

64

His mouth-oh. dear heavens, his mouth! His kiss wasn't tentative, though
at first it was sweet and undemanding. His lips caressing and clinging,
nibbling at her lower lip and gently sucking it into his mouth. But she
wasn't capable of hiding her feelings where he was concerned and when he
recognized her response, he teased her lips apart and sought out her
tongue, gently flirting with her until his kiss grew deep and sure, his
tongue drawing hers into a steady thrust and retreat that echoed the
motions of his hips against hers.

She'd run her fingers up the back of his neck when he'd first touched
her. Now she spread them wide, cradling his skull as he bent her
backward over one arm with the force of his kiss.

His fingers flexed, kneading her waist and she hung in his arms as he
melded their hips together. He was heavy and hard against her and she
thrilled to the exquisite pleasure of knowing she was the woman who'd
gotten him into such a state. Her own body was swollen, throbbing,
driving her to move against him. to relieve the breath-stealing intense
delight toward which she was steadily spiraling.

But then she became aware of a change in position. Derek was lifting her
more upright, and his mouth was gentling, slowing, the contained
ferocity of his kisses giving way to calmer, lighter ones as he
withdrew. He didn't let her go completely, still loosely encircling her
waist, and she allowed her hands to slide down to his chest, suddenly
feeling a ridiculous but undeniable shyness, and she couldn't meet his gaze.

"Kris?" His voice was husky and he cleared his throat.

"Yes?" Slowly she lifted her head and made eye contact.

He was smiling, a wry lopsided expression. "I, ah, don't know what to say."

She dared a small smile of her own. "Let's not say anything."

He sighed, his chest rising and falling beneath her hands. "I can't do
that, and you know it."

She sighed, too. "Mr. Have-It-All-Laid-Out. You're right-you can't do it."

A frown touched his face and his eyes clouded. "You know me so well...."

"That bothers you?"

He hesitated. "No."

"But you wish you hadn't kissed me." Her euphoria had fled. He didn't
have to say it; she read it in his eyes. Hurt sliced through her, even
deeper than before. Now she knew what Heaven could be. Having it vanish
right before her eyes was hell.

"Yes. No. I don't know!" He threw up his hands and moved away from her,
pacing in the familiar way he always did when he was agitated. "I need
some time to work out my feelings, to decide what to do- "

"Don't get yourself in a panic, Derek." She kept

her voice flat and even, containing tears through h willpower as she
slid the files back into the box.

66

"I'm not asking anything of you. Nothing has to change."

He stared at her, his face growing dark. "The hell it doesn't."

"Don't swear at me. I'm just trying to keep you from guilting yourself
to death!" Now her voice was sharp with exasperation but doggone it, he
was just so darn dense. "It was only a kiss."

"Was it?" He stepped forward as she backed toward the door, and suddenly
he wasn't safe, familiar Derek anymore. He was a stranger, a stranger
with hot, exciting questions in his eyes, a man to whom she felt an
overwhelming sexual attraction. He snagged the lapels of her blouse, and
hauled her close to him again.

They stared at each other for a moment, the silence thick and charged
with tension.

"Things have changed," he said in a low, intense voice. "I just have to
figure out what to do about you."

She hated the way he made her sound like a problem he had to take care
of and her temper flared again. "There's nothing to figure out," she
said, taking his wrists and tugging his hands away, aware that she was
only free because he'd allowed it. "You don't make decisions about how
you feel. It just happens. Or it doesn't."

She turned the doorknob but he put his hand on the door, holding it
closed for a moment. "I need some time to think about you," he said.
"About us."

Her heart leaped, but she squashed the blossom of feeling. How could he
not recognize what they had? What they could have? And why on earth did
she want a man who had to think before deciding how he felt about her?

"There is no us," she said, "and if you imagine I'm going to sit home
waiting while you dissect your feelings and decide whether or not I
might be allowed to fit into your life, you are seriously mistaken." Her
voice was shaking and tears were threatening to spill as she wrestled
the door out of his hand and escaped into the night.

Another week passed and the Fourth of July loomed.

Derek was dreading the holiday this year. He and Deb and Kristin had
gone to the fireworks together ever since they'd known each other, and
after Deb died, they'd kept the tradition going for Mollie. Last year,
they'd taken a picnic meal in to the school across from the field where
the fireworks display was held. They'd gotten a good spot high on the
hill, played with water pistols and read stories until dusk, and then
laid on their backs on the blanket-with Mollie between them-and watched
the celebration.

This year, who knew how the evening would go?

He hadn't talked to Kristin since she'd slammed out of his house last
week after that kiss that had turned his world upside down. She hadn't
called for advice or support on her concerns about the money problem at
the shelter, and she hadn't even called in the evening to see how Mollie
was. The day-care

68

ladies told him she'd been in several times to have lunch or read a
story to Mollie, so at least he knew she hadn't abandoned both of them.

Day care. It was going well and after that first disastrous day the
transition hadn't been as bad as he'd anticipated. But it still wasn't
working very well. They liked the children to be picked up by
five-thirty. Six o'clock was the latest they would stretch, and those
hours just didn't work for him. The clinic was open two nights a week
until seven, which meant he wasn't done until seven-thirty at the very
earliest.

When Kristin had kept Mollie, she had gone ahead and fed his daughter
earlier and then eaten with him while they talked about their days and
Mollie played around the kitchen. Now, he had to have Faye or Sandy run
over and pick up Mollie and keep her at the clinic until he was done.
They fed her snacks to keep her from getting cranky, so by the time he
could get her home and fix dinner, she wasn't hungry anymore. And she
usually was cranky anyway.

No, it wasn't working very well. He needed flexibility. And he was
beginning to fully appreciate just how flexible his arrangement with
Kristin had been. He'd advertised for a nanny and had three people to
interview over the next few days, but even with that, he doubted he was
going to be completely satisfied with the new arrangement. Kris had made
his life so easy she'd spoiled him for anyone else.

He eyed the phone. It was the second of July already, and he'd been
waiting for Kristin to call to firm up their plans for the Fourth. But
she hadn't

called, and he had the feeling she wasn't going to. Well he could afford
to be generous, he decided, picking up the receiver. He wasn't the one
who'd stalked off in a huff,

And what the heck had that been all about anyway? He hadn't stopped
thinking about that kiss all week. Or his reaction to it. Or the way
she'd reacted, winding herself around him like a living vine, opening
herself completely to his kiss.

His heartbeat doubled merely thinking about it. God, she'd been sweet.
He'd wanted to crawl into her caresses, to drown in the sensations she'd
aroused, to bury himself inside her so deep there was no telling where
he left off and she began. He'd never before allowed himself to think
like that, to fantasize about the shape of her breasts or the feel of
her slender legs locked around his hips, and it had been so
disconcerting he'd had to stop kissing her. And then he'd started
thinking about how she'd grown up practically before his eyes, and then
he wondered what Deb would have thought of him kissing Kris...and then
he'd been dumb enough to tell her he needed time to figure out their
relationship.

He could almost smile about it if he didn't miss her so much. She should
have been born a redhead, because it sure didn't take much to set fire
to her temper.

He started to punch in her number, then stopped. He'd better decide what
he wanted to say. or he was liable to have her jumping down his throat
again. I

70

still don't know what to say to you but I'd like to spend more time with
you. I miss you.

It was that simple. And it was honest. He had a feeling honesty was the
only way to go with her.

Decisive now, he did call, and when she answered, he was ready. "Hey,
Kris. How are you?"

"Fine." She sounded...cautious. "How about you and Mollie?"

"Mollie's fine." He could talk to her about his day-care problems on the
Fourth. "I'm not so fine. I miss you."

She was silent. Finally she said, "I know it's really different now that
I'm not around as much. It'll get easier."

It wasn't exactly the response he realized he'd been hoping for. "I
don't mean I miss your help with Mollie," he clarified. "I miss you. And
that's why I'm calling. What time do you want me to pick you up on the
Fourth? I thought it might be nice to do the picnic thing again. That
was fun last year."

He heard her catch her breath, and she was silent for a moment. "Um,
Derek, I can't get together with you and Mollie this year."

Now it was his turn to be silent. "Look, Kris, I'm sorry for upsetting
you the other night-"

"No," she said. "It's not that. If I were free I'd be glad to come with
you. But I already have a date."

She had a date. A date? He completely forgot what she said about being
glad to go along. "With who?"

"No one you know." Her voice sounded pleasant but firm. "He's a new
member of the church."

The church that he, Derek, attended on Christmas and Easter while she
had taken Mollie to Sunday school all year long. Until recently. "Oh."
He wondered if he sounded as shaken as he felt. "Well, maybe we'll see
you there."

"Maybe." Her voice was cheery. "Give Mollie a kiss for me."

"I will." What he really wanted was for Kris to give him another kiss.
But that was looking less and less likely as her words sank in. After
another lame exchange of small talk, he hung up-and threw the phone
against the wall in a rare display of temper that even he hadn't been
prepared for.

"Dammit!" He flopped down on the couch and drummed his fingers on his
knees. Alarm bells began to ring in his head. What an ass he was. Here
he'd been, thinking nonstop of himself and how a relationship with
Kristin would affect him.

It was a shock to realize that she wasn't even thinking of him at all.
If you imagine I'm going to sit home waiting while you dissect your
feelings and decide whether or not I might be allowed to fit into your
life, you are seriously mistaken.

God, she hadn't been kidding! He'd disregarded the words, he saw now,
because he assumed they were meant to manipulate him. But they hadn't
been. His heart sank. No, far from manipulation, Kristin was giving up.
Going out with someone else.

The thought made him want to snarl. She had no business going out with
another man after she'd kissed him like that! Deb might have been the only

72

other woman he'd ever had a physical relationship with, but he wasn't
stupid. He knew he wouldn't lose his head with just any woman like he
nearly had with Kris. God, they'd practically spontaneously combusted
the other night. He still got hard every time he thought about it.

He was so confused. He wanted her. He didn't want to want her. He was
afraid to want her. Kristin was a very different woman than Deb had
been. He hadn't ever envisioned himself with anyone besides the wife
he'd adored.

Sandy had been right. Kristin was very definitely a woman now. All
woman. But she wasn't the woman for him. He should be glad she was dating.

Glad. Ha! He felt anything but. In fact, he felt like throwing a few
more things around the room at the thought of Kristin going out with
someone else.

Kristin worked late the following Monday. After she checked to be sure
the rest of the staff had gone home, she pulled up the computer programs
that contained the previous year's daily expense entries. Although it
was looking more and more likely that Cathie had been steadily
embezzling from the sanctuary, she was still reluctant to believe it. So
reluctant, in fact, that she had yet to report it to the board.

As she studied the figures on the screen before her, a note taped to her
monitor caught her eye. Tuesday, 1:00 p.m.

She'd put it there so she wouldn't forget. Rusty Sheffield had asked her
to have lunch with him tomorrow. Although he said he wanted her to catch
him up on what she was doing, he'd made it plain that he considered it
more than a business lunch. He'd told her how beautiful she'd looked the
day of Summerfest. He'd asked her if she was involved with anyone and
had made his relief plain when she'd told him no.

It wasn't a lie, she told herself fiercely. A barely civil friendship
with Derek is not a relationship. And she ignored the little pain that
shot through her heart.

She'd promised herself she wasn't going to sit around and moon over
Derek. And so she'd said yes to Rusty, and yes to a real date on Friday
night with the electrician who'd come by the shelter to repair the
wiring. He was young, handsome and single, and she'd be a fool to wait
around, hoping Derek would love her someday. This could be her last
chance at a relationship!

A knock at the back door of the office startled her, and she quickly
minimized the program she had open. Then she went to the door with a
pleasant smile fixed firmly in place although the hours posted at the
entry clearly stated the sanctuary was closed for the evening. But when
she glanced through the window, she recognized Derek's SUV parked beside
her little compact car. Her heart rate doubled and her mouth went dry.
Good heavens. Had her wishful thinking somehow communicated itself to him?

Ridiculous, she told herself. You're being ridiculous. But she couldn't
prevent her body's response any more than she could hide the smile that
lit her

74

face when she saw Derek and Mollie on the other side of the screen door.
Friendly. Be friendly but not too familiar.

"What a nice surprise!" she said. "What brings you two my way?"

"I wanted to talk to you," Derek said, "and Mollie wants to see you, too."

Just then, Mollie spotted Hobby, the good-natured retriever mix who was
the office mascot. With a squeal, she went racing toward the dog, who
obligingly flopped down and exposed his belly for her to rub.

"Well," said Derek wryly, "she did want to see you. Looks like you've
been upstaged by a dog."

"It wouldn't be the first time that's happened." It was the first time
she'd seen him since the night he'd kissed her, and that kiss stood
squarely in the middle of her attempt at normalcy. Then she realized she
was standing there smiling foolishly. "Come on in. I was still working."

He frowned as he followed her into the inner office, leaning against a
file cabinet while she propped herself on the edge of her desk. "This
job doesn't pay enough for you to be putting in extra hours."

"I won't once I'm accustomed to everything." She lowered her voice even
though she knew no one else was around. "I've been going through the
expense entries, trying to find out where that money went."

Understanding crept into his eyes. "And you don't want to do it when
anyone's around."

"Right." Her spirits, buoyed by his visit, fell as

she recalled her concerns. "I can't find a thing that points to anyone
other than Cathie being the culprit."

"Have you told the board?"

She shook her head. "Not yet."

"You're going to have to tell them soon."

"I know." She sighed. "I just want to check a few more things before I do."

There was a small silence. Derek stuck his head out the door and when he
looked back at her, he was grinning. "Mollie's lying on top of the dog."

"Hobby's a patient fellow with children," she said. "How's she doing?"

"Pretty good. Day care is going fine now, thanks to your hair."

She smiled, reaching up a hand to flip a lock forward absently. She'd
been wearing it down much of the time since her talk with Faye and she
was getting used to the weight of it. "That's good."

"Yeah, except that I'm not going to be able to keep her there."

"What?" She straightened, her voice displaying her concern. "Why not?"

"It's a great place," he said, "but the hours are too confining. I'm
going to look for a baby-sitter who can be more flexible when I have to
stay late, and who can keep her longer on clinic nights."

"Oh. I never thought about that. Maybe I could-"

But Derek held up a finger. "No. You couldn't. But if you'd be willing
to help me interview prospects, I'd be grateful for the additional opinion."

76

"Of course." He was right. And she should be glad that it had finally
sunk into his thick skull that she wasn't going to be Mollie's
baby-sitter for the rest of their lives. But...

Another silence fell, this one less comfortable than the one before.
Talking about baby-sitting invariably led her to thoughts of the reason
Derek needed a sitter, which led to guilt, which in turn made her
annoyed with herself because there was absolutely no reason in the world
for her to feel guilty for wanting a life of her own.

"So how was your date on the fourth?"

"Fine." If she were honest, it had been a pain in the butt. The man
seemed to have more arms than an octopus and all of them had been
determined to touch her. She'd never been so glad to get home in her
life. She'd practically had to shut the door on him-definitely the best
part of the evening.

"Did you enjoy the fireworks?"

"Yes. Did you?"

"Yes, although Mollie missed you. She kept asking when you were coming."

"I'm sorry." And she was. She would much rather have been with Derek and
Mollie. But they'd been estranged after that disastrous kiss and she
hadn't imagined that he would want her company.

"What did you think of the new rockets they added this year?"

"They were interesting. I like the sounds they make."

"Yeah. We walked around and looked for you, but we didn't see you anywhere."

She stared at him. a suspicion forming in her head as his disconnected
statements began to mesh. "Are you trying to find out if I really went
to the fireworks?"

To her surprise, a deep flush spread up his neck and he avoided her
eyes. "It was kind of odd that we didn't see you."

"Well, I was there." What was going on here? He'd made it plain that he
wasn't ready for a relationship, that he wasn't even sure he had liked
kissing her enough to want to repeat the experience. He'd said he needed
time to figure out what to do about her, as if she were some bothersome
task he had to schedule and complete.

"Are you going to see him again?" There was a distinctly challenging
note in his voice, one that took her even further aback.

"Why?" Had he always been this tenacious? She was starting to wish she
had the nerve to tell him she was sleeping with Craig on a regular
basis, but she couldn't bring herself to lie.

"If he's going to be appearing in your life frequently, I want to meet him."

"You know," she said conversationally, holding onto her temper by a
thread, "I'm well over the age of consent and you're not my father."

"Are you going to see him again?" He was inflexible. Impossible.

She hesitated, then realized he wasn't going to

78

back off until she answered him. "Probably not." She narrowed her eyes.
"My dating life is none of your business."

He shoved off the file cabinet abruptly and headed out of her office.
She followed, completely bewildered and more than a little annoyed, as
he bent and swung Mollie into his arms.

"Give Kristin a kiss," he said to his daughter. And as Kristin reached
out and caught the little girl, Derek sent her an enigmatic smile over
the child's head. "Everything you do is my business, Kris."

On Thursday night, Faye got fast food for Mollie and him, although he
had to snatch bites of his burger between patients. By the time he
finished examining the last animal of the evening and got to the fries
they were stone-cold and unappealing, so he pitched them into the trash.
The food was a far cry from the usual tasty meals he'd enjoyed when
Kristin was in his life.

God, he missed her. He'd stopped by the sanctuary Monday night hoping to
catch her there. But their encounter had left him dissatisfied and
somewhat alarmed by her evasiveness.

Was she serious about dating other people? He'd expected to have more
time. More time for what?

More time to procrastinate, he finally told himself. More time to tell
himself they weren't right for each other. More time to pretend he
wasn't interested, didn't want her, wasn't going to care if she got
involved with some other man. More time to pedal backward every time she
came near.

He was, he realized, exactly the same as a woman who said no when she
meant yes. He wanted Kristin, he just hadn't wanted to admit it. She'd
been right when she accused him of keeping her around for convenience
sake, only it wasn't jobs he wanted her for. If she was tied up with
him, she was too busy to be going out with anyone else.

Only trouble with that strategy was, she wasn't around anymore. The
Fourth of July had been a prime example. As he and Mollie had sat on
their solitary blanket at the fireworks, his mind had been a jumble,
mixed emotions clouding his brain.

He'd looked for Kris. He'd taken Mollie for a walk through the crowds to
buy some caramel corn although his real mission, he could finally allow
himself to see, had been to find Kris. But they hadn't seen Kristin and
her date, and later, as his daughter dozed off on the blanket beside him
and the sky exploded into bright shards of light, all he could think of
was Kris. Why hadn't he seen her? It was possible he'd simply missed
her, but surely she'd have called out to Mollie, even if she didn't want
to talk to him.

Had they decided not to attend? And if not, where were they and what
were they doing? He gritted his teeth against the anger that rose once
more at the thought of Kristin in another man's arms. He had no right to
be mad, he told himself. He wasn't ready to declare himself, wasn't
prepared to begin taking her

80

out. He should be glad that she was turning her attentions away from him.

But he wasn't. He felt as if he'd had a bucket of ice water tossed in
his face and he recognized that he probably deserved it. All right, he
told himself. If you want her, you're going to have to let her know.

He felt as if he'd been wrapped in insulation since Deb had died, as if
his feelings had been cushioned, his interest in the other sex muted by
his loss. But now his insulation had been stripped away and all he could
think of was how much he wanted Kristin.

Without a conscious decision, he found himself steering the car toward
her town house. He was so deep in thought that he was a little startled
when Mollie realized where they were and squealed with excitement.

As he climbed out of the car he was suddenly struck by a bolt of
uncertainty. Should he be here? Should he be considering altering the
friendship he and Kristin had shared for so many years? She'd altered it
first, he reminded himself. She'd made him think, made him aware of her,
made him need again. It was too late to turn back.

He unstrapped Mollie from her car seat and went to Kristin's door. He
was just about to ring the bell when he realized the door was open a
crack. Cautiously, he poked a finger against it, and when it swung open,
he peered into the compact living room beyond.

Kristin lay on the couch, fast asleep.

Good lord. His blood ran cold at the thought of

her lying there, completely defenseless with her front door unlocked to
any predator that might come along. Anxiety rose. Was she ill? That
wasn't like her, to leave a door ajar.

Setting Mollie down, he crossed the room and knelt at the side of the
couch. He cupped her cheek in his palm, relieved to feel the cool silk
of her flesh beneath his touch. She wasn't feverish and he felt his
inner tension level ease fractionally.

"Kris," he murmured. "Come on, Sleeping Beauty. Time to wake up."

"Tristin?" Mollie squirmed in between his knees and leaned over to put
her tiny palm on Kristin's other cheek. "Time to wate up."

Kristin stirred beneath their hands. Her eyelids lazily floated open,
and she blinked twice. As she focused on their faces, a luminous smile
crossed her face. "I must be dreaming," she said in a soft, husky voice.

She put a hand to Mollie's cheek, but her eyes held his. "Hi."

"Hi! 'Tan I read a 'tory?" Mollie's attention was already diverted.

"Sure. You know where they are." As Mollie wriggled free and dashed off,
she continued to stare up at him.

Derek slid his thumb forward and gently brushed it over the full line of
her lips, still holding her gaze. "Your door was ajar. I thought
something was wrong."

Her eyes clouded. "Heavens. I'm sorry. I'm just

82

exhausted-I must not have closed it properly." As he continued to
whisper his thumb over the petal-soft plumpness of her lower lip, she
focused on him again. "Are you sure I'm not dreaming?"

86

Five

Derek leaned over Kristin. "You're not dreaming." He cast a glance at
Mollie, who was already immersed in one of the books Kristin kept in a
basket on the floor for her, then looked back at Kristin, his gaze
lingering on her lips. They looked soft and warm and he badly wanted to
kiss her, to shape and mold and caress until she returned the pressure
of his lips.

But not in front of his daughter. "Have you eaten anything?" he asked as
he sat back, his hip bumping hers.

She was staring at him as if he'd grown a second head and her eyes were
wide and dazed. "Wha-?"

"I'm hungry." He cut her off, not ready to deal

87

with a discussion of his feelings yet. "If you haven't eaten, we can eat
together."

"I haven't," she said absently. "I came home from work and crashed."
Then he could see her brain scramble into high gear. "I bet you just
finished work and haven't eaten anything, either. Derek, you can't
forget to eat. If you get sick you won't-"

He shifted his hand across her mouth, shaking his head. "Do you have any
eggs?"

She nodded behind his hand, her gaze locked on his.

"Good," he said. "I'll make us some omelets."

"But-"

"Go get your pajamas on." He stood and headed for the kitchen. "Come on,
Mollie. You want to help Daddy cook?"

"Uh-huh!" His daughter scrambled to her feet.

He found a skillet, eggs, butter, milk and cheese and with Mollie's
"help," started the omelets. He couldn't cook many things but he was
competent with the few he could.

By the time he'd set the small table in her kitchen, the first omelet
was done and he put it in the oven on a plate to keep it warm until the
rest were finished.

Kristin walked into the kitchen a few minutes later, clad in an oversize
T-shirt and jogging shorts.

He frowned. "I thought you were going to put your pajamas on."

She rolled her eyes. "These are my pajamas." She fingered the edge of
the bottoms. "Minus the shorts."

Minus the shorts. He turned back to the skillet, doing his best not to
think about Kristin in nothing but that T-shirt skimming the tops of her
thighs. Thighs he could imagine all too well, thanks to those short
skirts she'd taken to wearing recently and the trim little shorts that
bared a smooth expanse of creamy legs that looked a mile long.

He flipped the last omelet, then withdrew the plate from the oven, slid
the omelet atop the others and set it on the trivet he'd placed in the
center of the table.

"How about some salad with that?" Kristin retrieved a bag of lettuce and
assorted salad ingredients from the refrigerator, added several bottles
of dressing and salad bowls, and then they took their seats.

As they always had when they ate together, they clasped hands and let
Mollie say the little prayer she'd learned in Sunday school. When
Kristin would have withdrawn her hand afterward, he held onto her with a
light grip, and she stilled. "I've really missed our meals together," he
said quietly. "Thanks for letting us join you."

She sent him an almost shy smile from beneath her lashes. "You're
welcome. I'm glad you stopped by."

"Me, too, or your door might have been open all night." He sent her a
mock-frown, and when she grinned, he finally began to feel that they
were almost back on a normal footing. As normal as it could get,
considering.

Derek cut up some egg for Mollie while Kristin dished out salad. It was
quiet but comfortable and they listened to Mollie chatter. He allowed
Mollie to

8

leave the table after a short while since she already had eaten one
dinner and didn't seem terribly hungry.

"Any luck tracing your financial problem?" he asked Kristin. For some
reason, he found himself as reluctant as she to give voice to the ugly
accusation of embezzlement.

She shook her head. "No, but I have a meeting with Rusty tomorrow at
lunch and I'm going to show him what I've found."

"Do you want me to be there?" It was an impulsive offer, born of his
concern for her.

Her eyebrows rose and a look of surprise flitted across her features. "I
think I can handle it." She smiled at him. "But I appreciate the thought."

He wanted to talk to her about the feelings rolling around inside him,
but he wasn't sure how to start. And in any case, he couldn't seem to
make himself utter a word.

Kristin's smile faded. She reached over and laid a hand on his arm.
"Derek? Are you all right?"

No. How can I be all right when all I can think of is you? And it wasn't
just the sexual thoughts that were making him crazy, although they sure
weren't helping. He'd always cared about Kristin in a platonic
big-brother way. But now there was a more personal element to the way he
felt, a tender sweetness that caused his chest to tighten and his heart
to pound. It was just friendship, he assured himself. He had cared about
her for years.

Aloud, he said, "I'm fine." He laid his free hand over hers where it
rested on his forearm. "Will you

come over for dinner tomorrow evening? I'm on call. but you know how
that goes. It probably will be quiet until about 2:00 a.m." He smiled
sheepishly. "And I have an ulterior motive. I'd like your opinion on
some of the applications I've received for the nanny position."

Her smile faded. "I already have plans for tomorrow evening. I'm sorry.
Could we make it Saturday night?"

What plans? Who with? "Sure," he said. He lifted his hand and moved his
arm out from under hers, busying himself picking up dishes while he
fought the jealousy that urged him to demand she tell him her plans. Was
she going out with the Fourth of July date again? Or someone entirely
different?

She silently began helping him clear the table, putting things in the
dishwasher and setting salad dressings back in the refrigerator. When he
risked a glance at her, her expression was unreadable, and an
unaccountable streak of annoyance ran through him. He realized he'd
expected her to try to smooth things over, to cajole him into talking to
her like she always had before when he'd gotten into what she called "a
mood" about something.

But she hadn't. She acted as if she weren't even aware of his mood, and
that made him feel even worse. She'd cared before. He knew she had. But
ever since she'd brought up marriage and he'd flipped out, things hadn't
been right between them. And now...now he was afraid maybe he'd ruined
the relationship he had with her.

88

She'd said she was glad he'd stopped by. Did she mean that? Was it
directed at him, or was she simply pleased that he'd brought Mollie to
see her?

No, she'd been smiling at him when she'd said it, smiling in a very
feminine way that he was certain had been meant for him.

The telephone rang.

"Oh, rats," Kristin said.

He glanced at her. She'd just plunged her hands into soapy dishwater.
"Do you want me to get that?"

She shrugged. "Sure. Thanks."

He reached for the handset in the cradle on the far counter and turned
it on. "Hello?"

There was a moment of silence. "May I speak to Kristin, please?" It was
a deep, masculine voice.

A wave of sheer, unadulterated jealousy ripped through him. He had to
work to keep the satisfaction from his voice as he said, "I'm sorry, she
can't come to the phone right now. May I take a message?"

"Sure." The guy sounded ridiculously cheery. "Is this Kristin's father?"

The question caught him flat-footed. Her father? Was the guy kidding?
"No," he said, aware that his voice was more than a little testy. "It
isn't."

"Oh. Sorry." The man sounded less sure of himself now. "Would you just
tell her Rod called to confirm our date tomorrow night? I'll pick her up
at seven."

"Sure thing." Derek wanted Rod to come over so he could pound him into
the ground.

"Thanks, man."

Derek hung up the handset and slowly turned to Kristin. "That was
someone named Rod. He'll pick you up at seven tomorrow night."

"Oh." Her face grew pink. "Thank you," she said in a small voice.

"You're welcome." He clipped out the words, then turned and headed for
the living room. "Hey, Miss Mollie, it's time to go home."

"No!" Mollie clutched another book to her breast. "Not done reading!"

"Okay. One more," he said. "You have two minutes to finish that one." He
didn't want to have to go back into the kitchen and face Kristin so he
leaned against the wall and watched as his daughter became completely
engrossed in the pages of the book she was "reading."

"Derek?" Kristin's voice was soft.

He glanced back into the kitchen.

She stood in the middle of the room, one bare foot atop the other, with
that glorious out-of-control mane of hair rioting around her and falling
over her shoulders. Her hands were absently twisting her T-shirt hem and
she'd pulled it so taut that her smooth, flat stomach was exposed. The
shirt also outlined the curves of her breasts and he realized she had no
idea how she looked to him. How badly he wanted to go to her and smooth
a hand down over that delicate skin, to cup her breasts and lower his
mouth to them, to see that hair spread over his pillow.

"Are you angry with me?" She was frowning.

"No." Not exactly. He didn't move.

90

"Well, then, what's wrong?"

He shrugged, determined not to give voice to the little green monsters
racing around inside him. "I'm just not very satisfied with our
relationship right now and I don't know what to do about it." Well, that
was honest.

"You don't have to do anything about it." Her chin lifted a fraction.

He turned completely around to face her without saying a word, merely
holding her gaze with his until the belligerence drained out of her
expression.

He should leave. He was going to leave. He was leaving right now.

He stepped toward her, reaching for her hands, prying her fingers out of
the shirt fabric and intertwining his fingers with hers. "I'm not trying
to hurt you," he said quietly.

"I know." Her throat moved as she swallowed and suddenly there were
tears swimming in her eyes.

"Don't cry," he whispered. "We'll work it out."

"How?" Even though her voice was as quiet as his he recognized the
challenge in the single syllable.

A taut, expectant silence hummed between them for a moment.

"I don't know." He felt his shoulders sag. God, what was he supposed to
say? Was she still hoping he'd change his mind about marriage?

Without warning, an image of Kristin languidly reclining in his bed, her
mane of hair trailing across his white sheets, assailed him. Marriage
would give him unrestricted access to her lithe, subtle curves, to

her sweet, drugging kisses, to the shattering pleasure he knew he could
find in her arms.

Marriage. That was crazy. He couldn't marry her. You were supposed to
marry someone you loved, not someone for whom you had a critical case of
lust overload.

"'Tay, Daddy, I'm ready." Mollie's book banged shut with a loud snap and
he heard her scrambling to her feet.

"I'd better take her home." He knew it was a cop-out, saw the ember of
hope in Kris's eyes flicker and die. But he was too shaken by his
thoughts to figure out what to do or say to repair the damage.

She slipped her hands free from his and walked around him to scoop up
Mollie for a tickle and a kiss. "Thanks for making me dinner." But she
didn't look at him again. "See you, squirt."

"Bye, Mommy." His daughter threw her arms around Kristin's neck when she
knelt and threw herself into Kris's arms so wholeheartedly that Kristin
had to put a hand hastily to the floor to keep them both from being
pushed right over backward.

Mollie put her hands on either side of Kristin's face and peered deep
into her eyes. "Tiss."

"Okay. A nice big kiss and then Daddy will take you home." Kristin
suited the words to the action.

Derek opened his mouth to remind Mollie not to call Kristin "Mommy." But
then he shut it again without speaking. His throat grew tight and he had
to swallow the lump that rose as he watched his little

92

girl hug Kristin. The love in their embrace was undeniable.

Mollie was right. For all practical purposes, Kris was her mother, the
only one his child had ever known. Kristin had devoted herself to Mollie
since her birth, because Deb had been too sick to handle the demands of
a healthy infant, and she'd probably spent more time with his daughter
than many working mothers did with their own offspring. Already, Mollie
had known more of a mother's love than Kristin had in her entire life.

Funny, he'd never really thought of the parallel before. Kristin's
mother had died of a cerebral hemorrhage hours after a fall on a patch
of ice before Kristin was even a year old. Kris, better than anyone,
knew what it was like to be motherless, and she'd devoted herself to
making sure Mollie had never felt the same lack.

Was he crazy for refusing to consider a marriage between them?

Kristin rose, taking Mollie's hand. He was prepared for her to avoid eye
contact as she had in the past when things had gone wrong between them,
so it was a shock to see her smiling at him as she handed off his
daughter. An unpleasant shock. The smile was friendly and completely
impersonal, as if they'd never kissed, never discussed anything more
vital than the weather. And while he was trying to figure out what to
say to her in this new mood, she herded them both out her front door.
"See you around."

She shut the door and he heard the lock snick into

place before he was even off the stoop. As he strapped Mollie into her
car seat, he realized she hadn't said she would see them Saturday night.
Was she going to cancel on him?

She met the treasurer of the board of the sanctuary for lunch again on
Friday. Rusty was a few minutes late and they ordered immediately, then
he sat back and smiled at her.

"So," he said, "I guess you're not keeping Dr. Mahoney's little girl any
more now that you're working full-time for us."

She shook her head and smiled. "No." She refused the urge to elaborate
and waited for him to speak.

He studied her for a moment, and she wondered what he was thinking.
"Kristin," he finally said, "I'll be honest. I'd like to ask you out. I
just always thought that you and Derek-"

"-are both very aware that Mollie needs to grow up in a family
atmosphere," she finished when he hesitated. "Her mother died just
months after she was born, remember?"

He nodded. "Yes. So would you like to-"

"Rusty," she said, "I don't think it would be a good idea for me to go
out with someone who's employing me."

"So that means I'd better hurry up and find a permanent executive
director, I guess," he said. "Unless I can talk you into accepting the
position on a permanent basis. You've stepped in like you've always

94

done the job and I know you'd be an asset to the sanctuary."

"Not a chance," she said, smiling at him. "I've got plans for myself and
they don't include the AAS. Even if it was my father's dream come true."

"Everyone should have the chance to pursue their own dreams." He gave
her his most charming smile and not for the first time, she wondered why
she couldn't be head-over-heels for someone like Rusty. He was
good-looking and athletic and he liked animals. He had his own business
that apparently did quite well, judging from the sleek sports car he
drove and his membership at the local country club. He had flirted with
her since the first time they'd met, but she'd never been interested.
She'd never been able to see beyond her feelings for Derek.

Cathie, on the other hand, hadn't liked Rusty at all. He'd asked her out
several times when she'd first come to town, but she'd brushed him off
consistently. Rusty was a player, she'd always said. And she didn't want
a man she'd have to watch for the rest of her life. All she wanted was a
good guy who would treat her like precious china and give her children.

"I still can't believe Cathie's gone sometimes," she said.

Rusty sobered immediately. "I can't, either. She was terrific in that
position."

"She was a lovely person," Kristin said quietly.

"Well, sure, that goes without saying," Rusty said.

She hated to have to tell him what she'd found but

she had no choice. "Rusty," she said, "I've found a serious problem in
the sanctuary's financial statements."

"Oh?" His gaze sharpened. "We're in pretty good shape, thanks to the
income from that anonymous trust that came in just before your dad
passed away."

"It's not that." Now that she had his attention, she went on to explain
about the missing funds.

Rusty looked shocked. "Are you sure?" he asked several times. "Cathie
couldn't have done that. Could she?" But there was a kernel of doubt in
his tone.

"I can't believe it, either," Kristin said.

"Jeez." He smoothed a hand over his thick, wavy copper hair. "Have you
told the police?"

"Not yet."

"So you haven't told anyone else. That's probably a good thing." His
tone assumed she hadn't, and she didn't correct him. It hadn't really
been a question. Derek was the only other person who knew, and since he
was going to be sitting on the board, he would have to know soon anyway.

"I brought a summary of the information along." She handed the folder
across the table.

Rusty stashed it in his briefcase as though it might contain illegal
drugs. "God, Kristin, be careful with that. The last thing we need is
negative publicity for the sanctuary. Can you imagine what would happen
to donations if this gets out?"

She shuddered. "I don't even want to think about it. I've been having
nightmares already."

96

"I don't think we should tell anyone yet," he said. "You haven't found
anything linking her to this?"

"Not yet," she said.

"Could you possibly be wrong? Could it just be a clerical error with
transposed numbers or something?"

She shook her head. "That was the first thing I was hoping for, too."

Rusty sighed and plunged both hands into his hair, resting his elbows on
the table. "God, it makes no sense. Why would she have done it? Was she
having financial problems?"

"Not that I know of." She shrugged helplessly. She knew how he was
feeling. She'd been through all of these thoughts a million times.

"All right." He sighed. "Tell you what. You keep looking to see if
there's anything you haven't found yet. I'll make some very discreet
inquiries of my banking friends and run a credit check to see if she was
spending any odd amounts of money." He shook his head. "There's no point
in blackening her good name if she really wasn't involved."

"But who else could it be?" she asked. "You and Walker are the only
other two people who could access sanctuary funds, right?"

"Unless," Rusty said slowly, "someone was forging signatures or something."

That hadn't occurred to her and she felt better immediately. Maybe
Cathie really hadn't had anything to do with embezzling the money.

She refused dessert on the grounds that she had a

lot of work waiting, and parted company with Rusty soon afterward. As
she drove back to the sanctuary, her mind was whirling with thoughts.
She'd have to look at some of those cancelled checks again. If it had
been done electronically, it would be much more difficult to find.

Kristin's date that evening was fun. Rod, the man she'd met when he came
to do some electrical work with the shelter, had told her to dress
casually. She was glad she'd heeded his advice and worn a pair of her
new denim shorts.

He took her miniature golfing, then to dinner at a Mexican restaurant
where they sat outside on a small stone terrace and drank margaritas
while their dinners were made. Rod's partner in his business joined them
with a date of his own, and although Kristin had never met either of
them before, they were pleasant and amusing dinner companions.

He drove a small, modern sports car with a convertible top and he'd
folded it down at her request. Rod was unquestionably attractive. He was
in great shape, his sense of humor was wicked yet not unkind and his
friends were as nice as he was.

And yet she felt a little deflated at the end of the evening when he
walked her to her door. She caught herself comparing him to Derek at
least five times that evening and she was thoroughly annoyed that she
couldn't even go out on a date without thoughts of the wretched man
intruding.

Rod, unaware of her mood, slid an arm around her

98

waist as they walked toward her stoop. At the door, he brought her to a
halt, turning to face her. "I had a great time this evening, Kristin."

"So did I," she forced herself to say lightly.

"I'd like to see you again."

"It was fun," she said without committing herself. "I enjoyed meeting
Kevin and Leslie."

"How about if I call you next week and we see if we can schedule another
get-together?"

"All right." She hadn't actually said she'd go out with him, she told
herself. All she'd agreed to was receiving his phone call.

He looked down at her, then put his hands on her shoulders and drew her
near. She lifted her face for his kiss, allowing the gentle pressure for
a moment before drawing back a fraction, and with a last warm smile, Rod
said, "Good night."

"Good night." She waved him off and stood on the stoop for a moment
before she turned and unlocked her door. Rats. What had she been hoping
for? Fireworks? Rod's kiss had been pleasant, but there was no zing. At
least, not on her part.

She went inside and shut her door, then leaned back against it,
thinking. It hadn't left her breathless and shaking, the way she'd felt
after that first night Derek had kissed her. It hadn't left her wanting
more, wanting to press herself against every hard inch of him, wanting
his hands to touch all the secret, throbbing parts of her that quivered
with desire.

A knock on the door scared her so badly she actually gave a small scream
as she leaped away from

the cool surface against which she'd been lingering. One hand flew to
the base of her throat. "Who is it?" she called cautiously, pushing the
small button that illuminated her watch face. Good grief. It was after
eleven. Who in the world- "It's Derek. Let me in, Kris."

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Six

Kristin turned and stared at the closed door. Derek? How could that be?
Then she realized that it must be his Friday night on call. He and
another local vet took turns covering weekends to give each other a
break. But-

"Where's Mollie?" she asked as she pulled the door open.

"Faye's daughter Sissy is keeping her overnight since I'm on call," he
said tersely. "Who was that? And didn't you ever learn you shouldn't
kiss a guy after a first date?"

She fought back twin surges of jealousy and irritation. Mollie had never
had a baby-sitter other than Kristin or Faye before. And what was he
doing questioning her? "You're getting really tiresome," she told him.
"How do you know that was our first date? As I know I've said before, I
have no intention of telling you about the men in my life." She lifted
her chin and started to close the door in his face. "Now if that's all
you came by for, I'd like you to leave."

Derek slapped his palm flat against the door, easily preventing her from
closing it. "Wait." She heard him inhale a deep breath, then slowly
release it. "Kris, just wait a minute." He took a deep breath. "Can I
come in?"

She let a tense silence fall while she debated the wisdom of allowing
him to enter. But finally, her desire for his company won out over
common sense. "All right." She stepped back and opened the door. "But
one more question about anything that's none of your business, and
you're history, buddy."

She hadn't even turned on any lights yet, and the room was barely
illuminated by a small crystal lamp whose base she had switched on
before she left. She started to move away from him, but Derek caught her
hand. "Kris?"

"What?" She avoided looking up at him. Her whole body was tingling with
a vivid awareness of how close he was, her breathing coming ridiculously
fast, her pulse hammering. Why couldn't she have had this reaction when
Rod kissed her? Derek had barely touched her and already he'd gotten
more of a physical response from her than poor Rod had the entire evening.

It was a joke, she decided. A great big cosmic

102

trick, that she would have such intense, serious hots for the one guy
who absolutely didn't want her.

Well, perhaps he wanted her, she thought, recalling that heated kiss in
his kitchen, but he didn't want to, which might be even worse.

Then Derek took her other hand and turned her toward him, and she forgot
about everything else. "I'm sorry," he said, and his voice rang with
sincerity. "I didn't come over here to fight with you."

She nodded once. "Apology accepted." She hesitated. "So why did you come
here tonight? It's not exactly a prime visiting hour."

He smiled, clearly recognizing the conversational olive branch she was
extending. "I was called in for an emergency this evening and I just
finished. I don't really know why I'm here. I just...came by."

He sounded as baffled as she felt. "All right." She strove for normalcy
despite the fact that he was still holding both her hands. "Would you
like some iced tea? I made decaf yesterday."

He shook his head. "No tea." His hands tightened as he pulled her
closer. "Did you enjoy his kiss?"

She stiffened immediately, averting her face, but he ignored her
struggles, folding her against him and holding her there with disgusting
ease.

"I hope not." His breath was warm in her ear, his voice a rough velvet
rope twining around her and inexorably drawing her closer. "The first
time I kissed you, you enjoyed it. So did I. I haven't been able to
think about anything but kissing you since then." He cupped her cheek in
one big hand and

tipped up her chin with his thumb, and his eyes were dark and intense.
"I didn't come here for tea or talk, Kris. I came for your kiss."

Dear God. How was she supposed to resist an admission like that? She
felt her resistance melt away as if it had never been, and she relaxed
against him as he drew her even closer. She grazed the hard line of his
jaw with her lips, loving the feel of his haven't-shaved-since-morning
stubble. "Then what are you waiting for?" she murmured.

His belly heaved with a silent laugh as he pulled her more securely into
his arms and lowered his head. And then his lips found hers, and just
like the first time, her whole body exploded into a sizzling, crackling
whirl of heat.

This time, she was ready. This time, she lifted herself on tiptoe so
that the hard ridge of his arousal fit snugly into the vee where her
thighs met, and they both gasped at the exquisite sensation. Lightning
exploded through her body, unerringly striking the sensitive flesh
between her legs. Without thinking, she twisted against him, increasing
the sweet pleasure.

Derek rolled his hips against her and his tongue echoed the thrust as he
sought her response. He deepened the kiss, his powerful arms cradling
her, one hand sliding down to cup her bottom and pull her even harder
against him. She tore her mouth from his, gasping as her head fell back.
He barely paused, simply transferred his attention to the slender line
of her throat, and she felt his hot mouth tracing a fiery trail down
over the slope of her breast. He cupped

104

her breast in one hand and she cried out, arching in his arms as he
rubbed a thumb roughly back and forth across her nipple.

And then, with no warning, he froze. His whole big body went rigid
against her.

"Derek?"

In response, he lifted his head. One hand still held her clasped against
him but the other fumbled at the back pocket of his pants until he'd
extracted-

His pager. He peered at the number displayed, and she felt him heave a sigh.

Above her head, he said, "May I use your phone?"

"Sure." Her legs were trembling as she stepped back, but he didn't let
go of her hand as he crossed the room, and she nearly stumbled as he
towed her behind him.

He picked up the handset and punched in the number with his thumb, then
leaned against the doorframe and pulled her to him again.

Bemused, she slipped her arms around his lean waist and put her head on
his chest.

"This is Dr. Mahoney," he said into the phone, the deep tones of his
voice rumbling in her ear. As he listened, he slowly straightened. "All
right. I'll be there in five minutes."

He set down the receiver and she felt him sigh again as he put his arm
back around her. He rested his chin atop her head. "I have to go. Dog hit by

car.

"Anyone I know?" She strove for a normal tone,

but inside her entire body was quivering with pleasure and happiness.

"Doubt it," he said. "New clients a month ago." He leaned back and
looked down at her, and even in the dim light she could see his serious
expression. "Tonight changes things."

She regarded him soberly. "Does it?" She'd thought that after the first
time he'd kissed her and look where that had left her.

"Have lunch with me tomorrow? We can order in if you like."

"How about I bring lunch?" she offered. "Would you like me to pick up
Mollie or will you have time?"

His expression changed, a small, private smile slipping over his
features, and she felt something low in her abdomen contract sharply in
response. "I'm not inviting Mollie," he said. "She can join us for
dinner like we planned. It's about time you and I had the occasional
meeting without a pint-size chaperone."

"Oh." It was hard to take a deep breath, and she hoped he couldn't hear
her heart pounding as if she'd just run a five-minute mile. She was very
conscious of his hard, lean frame pressed against her, and she wondered
why he seemed to be taking this all so in stride. "All right, then. I'll
meet you at the clinic."

"Sounds good." He dipped his head and pressed one short, hard kiss
against her mouth, withdrawing and releasing her before she could
respond. "Noon tomorrow. See you then."

106

"See you then," she echoed as he turned and strode to the door.

"Lock it behind me," he instructed before he pulled it shut behind him.

She rolled her eyes fondly as she crossed to the door. Then the full
impact of his visit hit her, and her hands began to shake. She locked
the door and sank down on the first step of the small landing that led
to her second floor.

Had she dreamed what had just happened? Slowly she lifted her hand and
touched her fingers to her lips. Derek had kissed her.

Again.

And it hadn't been an impulse that he'd regretted the instant it had
ended, either. He'd admitted as much.

A bubble of nervous laughter rolled up and slipped out before she could
catch it. Good grief. If one little kiss did this to her...

Only it hadn't been one little kiss. It had been several, and anything
but small if the solid feel of Derek's body pressed against hers was any
indication. Her stomach fluttered as she relived the way he'd ground
himself against her, the rasp of his thumb stimulating her nipple.

That page was probably the only reason she wasn't lying naked on her
living room rug right this very moment! The thought made her shiver
again with helpless anticipation. She'd been practically mindless,
responding completely to his touch and taste, overpowered by the reality
that exceeded her girlish

dreams of making love with Derek. In another minute, she'd have yanked
her shirt up and out of the way and offered herself to him.

She dropped her face into her hands and blew out a frustrated breath.
Her whole body was humming with arousal. It was a good thing she'd never
known exactly how he could make her feel or she might have jumped him
months ago.

No. She sobered immediately. Derek hadn't been ready for her months ago.
In fact, he hadn't been ready for her a few weeks ago, when she'd first
brought up the notion of changing their relationship.

Even tonight, he hadn't sounded sure of his course of action. Even if
his body knew exactly what it wanted, Derek was still trying to cope
with the sudden shift of reality around him.

She knew it was hard for him to let go of Deb. But she couldn't help
hoping. Especially after tonight! She couldn't help thinking that
perhaps he soon would be ready to live again.

She'd known and loved Deb, too. They'd spent hours together, as close as
the sisters neither of them had ever had. And she was positive that Deb
wouldn't have wanted Derek to be alone forever. Maybe it was just
rationalizing her feelings, but she believed that Deb would be happy
that she loved Derek so much. That she would want them to marry and give
Mollie the family she would have had if Deb had lived.

And whether or not he was ready to admit it, he wanted to move on. too.
In an about-face that still

108

stole her breath when she thought about it, he'd come to her tonight.
He'd admitted he couldn't stop thinking about her. That he wanted to
kiss her. That was a huge step forward.

And tomorrow would be another. He'd asked her to come and have lunch
with him.

Oh, she'd taken sandwiches by, had actually packed him a lunch, many
times in the past. And she and Mollie had run by to visit at lunch
countless times as well.

But he hadn't asked her to pack him a lunch, or to bring Mollie. He
wanted to see her. Just her. She flopped backward onto the landing and
kicked her legs into the air in a ridiculous moment of joyous anticipation.

"Hi, everyone." She closed the back door of the veterinary clinic behind
her the following day at noon.

She was answered by a chorus of greetings from the receptionists and
technicians buzzing around the front desk area.

Sandy glanced up with a smile. "No Mollie?"

"No Mollie," Kristin confirmed.

"Hey, Kristin." Faye waved at her, then pointed toward the hallway.
"Derek said to tell you to go on into his office and he'd be in when he
could get away. Someone just came by with Chinese takeout." She checked
her watch. "He's not running far behind today. Just give him a few
minutes." She grinned at

Kristin, then silently lifted her right hand in a fist with the thumb
extended upward.

Kristin smiled in return, hoping the rest of the staff hadn't
interpreted Faye's meaning, then walked back along the hallway to the
door of Derek's office.

The bags of Chinese food were parked on the edge of his desk, so she
opened them and began taking the lids off things, tearing open the bags
of plastic utensils and laying out the containers of different items.

When the door opened, she spun around. Her heart leaped into her throat
and hung there, pounding, while Derek closed the door with a quiet
click. "Hi."

"H-hi." She had to clear her throat. "I, ah, I brought several resumes
along. The board hasn't advertised the position yet but some of them
have invited people they thought might be qualified for the executive
director's position to apply. Anyway, they wanted your opinion."

He hung his lab coat on a hook and started across the room. There was a
warm, intent expression in his eyes that scattered her thoughts and she
felt her pulse began to increase its rhythm.

"My opinion?" As he reached her, he slid his arms around her waist and
drew her to him, lowering his head. "My opinion is that if I don't kiss
you again soon I'm going to go crazy."

She wasn't ready! Automatically she lifted her arms, palms out in a
futile and halfhearted attempt to stop him. It seemed silly, given the
way she'd pined for him for so long. But she felt self-conscious and

110

uncomfortable in his arms. They were right here in his office. Anyone
could walk in.

Then his lips touched hers and she knew that self-conscious or not, she
wasn't going to be able to control her response to him, wasn't going to
be able to moderate the need that welled up from deep inside her. Rather
than holding him stiffly at arm's length, her hands smoothed up over his
shoulders to clasp the back of his neck and slide deep into his hair.
She pressed her body urgently against his, shuddering at the feel of his
hard, steely frame imprinting itself on her softer one.

His lips were urgent, persuasive, and she opened her mouth helplessly,
letting him deepen the kiss in an erotic harbinger of lovemaking. It
felt, somehow, as if she'd never really lived before these past few days
in his arms. As if she'd been asleep in a walled tower like a fairy-tale
princess, waiting for the right kiss to bring her to life.

She was alive now. Oh, she certainly was! Immersed in the wonderful
sensation of being touched by the one man in the world who could make
her feel so complete, she didn't protest when his fingers slipped
beneath the edge of her short blouse. His hand was warm and sure as he
traced small circular patterns on her sensitive flesh, his fingers
trailing breath-stealing streaks of pleasure wherever they lit. His hand
moved up her torso as he kissed her relentlessly, demanding her response
as he sought out each rib, slowly exploring her until he was brushing
the full undercurve of her breast. He paused there

momentarily, lightly brushing his thumb back and forth. Finally, his
thumb ventured higher, gently rubbing her stiff and aching nipple
through the lacy bra she wore, and her back arched involuntarily as hot,
liquid desire shot straight down to the sensitive apex of her thighs.

A small moan escaped her. The sound startled her and interrupted the
daze of desire, and she came out of the sensual moment long enough to
grab his wrist. "Wait. Someone might come in."

Derek stilled, his mouth and his hand both frozen in place. Finally, he
pulled his mouth away from hers, shaking his head as if shaking off a
hypnotic spell as he slowly, reluctantly withdrew his hand, caressing
her gently as he tugged her blouse back into place. "Whoa. I'm sorry."
He blew out a dazed breath as he shook his head. "That got...a little
out of hand."

"A little?" Her laugh was shaky as she straightened her shirt.

He stroked a hand down the unruly length of her hair and released her,
smiling crookedly. "You sit over there." He backed away from her, waving
toward the chair on the other side of the desk. "I don't trust myself
when you're within reach."

I don't trust myself when you're within reach. It was true. The muscles
of his belly tightened as he looked across the desk at her.

Her hair was a wild, curly tangle and her eyes glowed with warmth. Her
lips were red and swollen and there was a pink flush along her jawbone where

112

his beard stubble had abraded her tender skin. He hadn't meant to do
that, and he suffered a momentary remorse at marking her. The scariest
part was that he couldn't even remember how it had happened.

God! She exploded in his arms, her response a sweet, honest welcome that
made it difficult for him to remember his own name, let alone anything
else. He'd been celibate by choice in the years since his wife had died
and now his body felt as if he were ready to make up for all the
thousands of lonely hours in one hot, steamy, endless night.

To distract himself, he said, "Tell me about these applicants while we eat."

"All right." Kristin pushed a set of utensils at him. He was grateful
that she accepted the change of subject so easily. It gave him time to
come to grips with the way his world had changed.

A sexual relationship. With Kris. Giving voice to the idea, even if it
was only in his head, gave him pause. Was he really thinking of having
an affair with her?

He knew how he'd feel if she were contemplating such a course with any
other man, and he wasn't sure he even liked himself very much for
considering her that way. God, this whole situation was making him
crazy. Deliberately, he forced himself to set aside his churning
thoughts. Kristin didn't appear to be the least bit conflicted as she
prepared plates of the Chinese food for each of them. Maybe he was
making too big a deal out of the whole thing.

As they ate, she detailed the three individuals who had applied for the
executive directorship.

None of them, in his opinion, sounded like what the sanctuary needed.
"I'd like to see them hire someone who can take the sanctuary to a new
level," he told her. "Someone with experience in fund-raising and
marketing. Someone who sees expanding our sights beyond the local
efforts in a positive light."

"What do you mean, 'beyond the local efforts'?" She was studying him,
her intelligent green eyes assessing as she considered his words.

"State-wide. Nationally, even." He hunted through one of the stacks of
literature on his desk, coming up with the magazine he wanted. "This is
from a nationally known animal sanctuary in Utah. They get grants,
enormous bequests, stuff like that. They have tons of clever programs
that encourage people to donate to special projects. And they offer
how-to seminars on everything from fund-raising to feral cat colonies."
He tapped the magazine with a finger. "You should look at this."

"I will." She took it from him and laid it aside, concentrating on her
food. "I've been thinking about the next director, too. I'm going to
recommend to the board that they create a contract with a definite end
date and a set of goals they'd like to see accomplished in that time.
That way, they'll be able to measure how well someone is working out and
give themselves a way to release an employee who isn't living up to
expectations. If we were to hire someone

114

like you're talking about, that would be a vital part of the contract."

His eyebrows rose. "Great idea." He cleared his throat, remembering a
conversation he'd had with Rusty a few days before. "Have you considered
staying in the position?"

She cocked her head. "Permanently?"

He nodded. "Rusty mentioned to me that the board wanted to ask you to
accept the job for good."

"He hinted at it." She shook her head. "Not interested. Although I'm
enjoying the challenge, I still want to keep my accounting practice. I'm
actually planning on expanding it once you find the right person for the
executive director's job."

"Expanding it?" He had never really spoken much with Kris about her
work, he realized with a pang of guilt. Most of the time, they talked
about Mollie or about things that went on in his practice, about the
upkeep of his home or about the sanctuary. He couldn't remember the last
time it had occurred to him to ask her about her goals and dreams.

She nodded. "I can go full-time. It would be a nice leap in my income
level, let me finally get out from under-oh, never mind. I'm sure this
is boring you to tears." Her gaze slid away from his and she
concentrated on her food. "Tell me how Mollie is doing. Are you still
planning on looking for another private sitter?"

Derek studied her in silence. What the heck had just happened? She'd
been discussing her business when suddenly she'd stopped making eye contact,

her posture had changed from relaxed and easy to straight-backed and
rigid, and she'd fixed on a bright, fake smile that he didn't think he'd
ever seen before. "Yeah," he finally said. "I still need a sitter. But
Mollie's enjoyed day care so much I'm thinking of signing her up for
preschool a couple of days a week. It'll be part of the sitter's job to
take her and pick her up."

The odd smile faded from Kristin's face and a genuine, far more familiar
frown replaced it. "You mean you're going to let a total stranger drive
her around?"

"Well, yeah." Although he hadn't really even considered that aspect of
the idea.

"What if the person has an old rattletrap of a car? How will you know if
he or she has a safe driving record? What will you do about a car seat-?"

"Hold on!" He held up one hand, palm out. "This is just something I was
considering. I haven't interviewed anyone yet, and I honestly hadn't
even thought about car safety. Do you want to help me put together a
list of questions?"

She nodded immediately. "Sure. And as long as I'm making suggestions,
why don't you see if there are any agencies in the area that provide
nannies? We'd still want to conduct our own interviews and check
references, but at least we'd know they'd come recommended with some
initial screening done."

We. Two little letters that made one very simple word. But something in
the way she said it struck him like a bolt of lightning from a cloudless
sky. We. When had it begun to sound so good to him?

116

He finished his meal, then came around the desk and held out his hand to
her.

She looked at his outstretched hand, then up at his face. Slowly, she
placed her palm in his and let him draw her to her feet.

Neither of them said a word. Still holding her gaze, he drew her into
his arms and lowered his head. The moment his lips touched hers, he felt
the same thrill as he had before. The irresistible call of desire, of
need and passion and heat and all the things he'd missed for so long and
had found in her arms. He kissed her deeply, plunging his tongue into
her mouth in search of her uniquely exciting response, delighting in her
slick, soft flavor. His hands slid down her back, stopping just above
the sweet swell of her bottom. His palms practically itched with the
need to slide farther down and cup the soft globes, but this wasn't the
place to grope her like an adolescent boy. The last thing he wanted to
do was make her uncomfortable. Besides, if he started, he wasn't at all
sure he'd be able to stop. So much for noble motives.

He reached up and tugged lightly on her arms, drawing them down from his
neck and holding them between their bodies. "Much as I'd like to do this
for the rest of the day, I've got to get back to work."

Kristin's eyes were soft and dazed, her lips red and full. She blew out
a breath as her forehead dropped to rest against his chest. "It's
probably just as well," she muttered.

He found he didn't like the sound of that sentiment. "Why?"

She looked up at him, her tone mildly exasperated. "Derek, it hardly
seems fair for me to be kissing you like this. You know I'm dating
several men right now and I'm certainly not carrying on with them like I
just did with you."

I'm dating several men. A primal surge of jealousy and possessiveness
rushed through him. "You'd better not be." His voice sounded thick and
rough to his own ears, and he didn't wait for her to respond before he
bent his head and took her mouth again. He released her wrists and took
her by the hips, tugging her firmly against his body, knowing she
couldn't miss the pulsing column of arousal that hadn't completely
subsided since he'd walked into the room. The hell with not making her
uncomfortable. She could damn well feel as uncomfortable as he did right
now.

"No more dating," he said, lifting his mouth a breath from hers. "I told
you the other night that things have changed."

"This is going to be an exclusive relationship," he told her.

"Exclusive in what way?"

God, did the woman have to argue with every word that came out of his
mouth? "Neither of us is going to see anyone else from now on."

She frowned. "You weren't seeing anyone before. I'm the only one who's
concerned about my life passing me by." Her eyes looked suspiciously
moist. "I can't just be your sexual toy, Derek."

118

He rubbed his hands up and down over the slender line of her back,
feeling the delicate bone structure beneath his palms. Despite her
youth, Kristin was one of the most capable, competent women he'd ever
known. He thought of her as self-assured, as sturdy and indestructible.

Perhaps too much so. He'd ignored her need for reassurance, for support
and commitment because it hadn't occurred to him that she needed those
things. Now he knew she did. She was as vulnerable, in her way, as any
other woman.

A fatalistic sense of calm descended, and he knew what he was going to
say mere moments before he opened his mouth. "I don't want you to be a
sexual toy. I want you to be my wife."

119

Seven

The words were shocking, even to him. Derek suddenly couldn't draw a
deep enough breath and an instant tension stiffened his limbs.

Kristin froze in his embrace. She didn't say a word.

"Kris." He stepped back and took both her hands in his, then took a deep
breath and dropped to one knee in front of her. "Will you marry me?"

God. The sound of the words hitting the air was nearly a physical pain
in his heart. He'd spoken those words once before, holding Deb in his
arms on a park bench just as a brilliant sunset feathered across the sky.

He and she had been young. So young. Who could

120

have known that she'd be dead in just over a decade, years before her time?

Kristin was still standing in front of him, and he forced himself to set
aside the painful thoughts. The past was over. Buried.

And he realized she hadn't said a word.

He cleared his throat and tried to smile. "I, ah, didn't think you'd
find a marriage proposal from me abhorrent."

"It's not that," she said slowly, soberly. "It's shock. You didn't want
to marry me last month. What's changed?"

"I didn't know what I wanted last month. Not even last week," he said
honestly, trying to give her question the respect it deserved. "Ever
since you first brought up the idea of marriage my head's been in a
spin. I thought I was content with the way my life was going, but I
don't think it was contentment I was really feeling. I was in a rut and
it was easier to stay there than to look for a new path."

Kristin swallowed. Her eyes were wide, a dark mossy green filled with
shock. "And the new path is asking me to marry you?"

He rose and smiled down at her. "It's not a new path, is it? It's one
that I've been avoiding taking for too long now."

Something moved in Kristin's eyes, some screen dropped and he was
momentarily seared by...by what? What had he seen? Pain? Anger? "Wow,"
she said. "Overwhelm me with romance, Derek."

Romance. The word reminded him of Deb again,

of the excitement and anticipation he'd felt during their courtship and
early years together and a wave of grief stronger than he'd felt in
months swamped him. This was nothing like that. And he didn't want her
thinking, couldn't have her thinking or hoping it could be. A lump rose
in his throat and he had to pause for a moment before he could speak.

"Look," he said. "I'm not young and romantic, Kris. What we have between
us isn't romance, but it's just as good in many ways. Friendship,
dependability, shared interests." He lowered his voice. "I can promise
you that I'll be faithful. And I think we've safely established that
we've got chemistry on our side."

"Sexual compatibility is nice, but it's certainly not a good reason to
marry someone," she pointed out.

He was beginning to feel a little frazzled. What the hell did she want
from him? Hadn't he just done exactly what she'd wanted? "I'll be a good
provider. You can work or not, I don't care, as long as we have good
child-care arrangements for Mollie."

"And other children?" Her voice was little more than a whisper, but the
question froze him in place.

More children? God, he'd never even considered that possibility. He'd
been stupid not to, he saw now. Kristin was a young woman. Of course she
would want children of her own.

Children of her own. Children with him. It was almost hard to breathe in
the close confines of the little room. "I, ah, I need some time to think
about that," he managed to say in what he hoped was a

122

relatively normal tone. "I see that we have a lot more issues to think
through than I'd first considered. Let's talk more tonight."

"You still want me to come over for dinner?" She sounded vaguely
surprised and he realized he hadn't been all that successful at
concealing his turbulent emotions from her after all.

"Yeah." He put out a hand and stroked the back of his fingers down her
cheek. "I do. Will you come?"

She smiled, although he thought it seemed a little shaky. "All right."

It took all the nerve she possessed to force herself to approach the
front door of her childhood home at seven that evening. She'd been
letting herself in with a key for years, first when it was her home and
more recently after Deb's death. But tonight Kristin felt like a
stranger as she stood on the stone front porch holding a plate of the
rice cereal treats that she knew both Mollie and Derek loved.

She rang the doorbell and shifted restlessly from foot to foot as she
heard Mollie's racing footsteps. Derek's heavier tread approached at a
more sedate pace. She was afraid when she opened her mouth to speak all
the butterflies in her stomach were going to spill right out in a wild,
bright-colored swarm and flit away. Of course, they would have left
behind cocoons chock-full of new ones to replace them.

The door swung open and even though she was expecting it, her stomach
lurched. Derek stood facing

her as Mollie danced madly in front of him, chattering a welcome. Over
the little girl's head, their eyes met and the breath whooshed out of
her lungs at the heated awareness in his blue gaze. Her abdomen
contracted sharply as he surveyed her from head to toes and back again.
She'd taken special care with her appearance tonight, not wanting to be
too dressed up and yet wanting to be sure he noticed her.

From the look in his eye as he checked out her sleeveless, scoop-necked
aqua sweater and short, beige linen skirt, she'd succeeded. "Hi," he said.

"Hi." She didn't know what to say to him; the things they needed to talk
about weren't issues that could be easily discussed with the distraction
of a child.

Mollie grabbed her hand and tugged her into the foyer. "Come see my new
baby Daddy bringed!"

"A new baby?" Feeling unbelievably skittish and shy, she concentrated on
Mollie. "What's her name?"

"Zu-zie." The little girl took her hand and tugged her toward the family
room.

"Ah. Susie. I like that name," Kristen said. She glanced over her
shoulder at Derek and caught him grinning.

"Shall I take those?" he asked, indicating the dessert bars.

"Yes, please," she said. "But don't you dare eat any before dinner." And
with that small exchange, she suddenly felt much more comfortable, as if the

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world had righted itself to a more familiar perspective.

Derek snapped his fingers. "You know me too well."

"And don't you forget it." She returned his smile and their eyes held
for a long moment. But it didn't make her nervous or jittery this time.
It was true. She did know him well. She couldn't think of a single thing
she could be asked about him that she wouldn't know.

Mollie claimed her attention again then, and while Derek got dinner on
the table, she played with the little girl. As she did so, she realized
how much she had missed these times together. Mollie seemed to have
grown taller just in the short time since Derek had enrolled her in day
care. And she was learning to tie "bunny ears," she informed Kristin. A
pang of loss shot through her heart at that news.

And then a different feeling smote her heart. If Derek really wanted to
marry her, Mollie would be her daughter, just as she'd imagined so many
times in her daydreams. It was almost too much to hope for, and she
forced herself to turn off the frantic thoughts vying for notice in her
mind.

She read the little girl several stories. After that, while Mollie
became engrossed in folding her baby's blanket, Kristin got up and moved
into the kitchen. She felt odd, acting like a guest when she knew how
hectic Derek's life was. He didn't need the added stress of entertaining.

"Need any help?" she asked him, automatically opening the drawer where
the flatware was kept.

He smiled, but shook his head. "Believe it or not, I have everything
under control. I set the table earlier so I wouldn't have to worry about
it, and the potatoes should be just about done. Why don't you just sit
down over there and keep me company?"

"Nobody needs me anymore, just as I predicted," she said, trying for a
light tone as she perched on one of the bar stools at the center island.
"Mollie's learning to tie and you're managing to cook."

"Hold on a minute." Derek set down the spoon he'd used to stir the green
beans and came around the corner of the island. "We may be learning a
few new tricks but we'll always need you, Kris." He reached for her,
pulling her into his arms, and she instantly felt the lack of oxygen to
her brain at the feel of his hard, warm body against hers. She hadn't
expected the embrace, hadn't expected him to act like a lover, although
that made little sense given the way he'd acted earlier in the day.
Still...she'd been in and out of his home for years as a friend and the
sudden shift felt distinctly weird.

He kissed her lightly, but before she could respond he released her and
walked back to the stovetop. "I'd better get this meal on the table."

It was wonderful to sit down and have a meal with Derek and Mollie
again, and afterward she convinced him to let her give Mollie her bath
while he cleaned up the kitchen.

"I meant for you to be strictly a guest tonight,"

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he told her ruefully as Mollie raced ahead of her up the steps.

"Derek, I want to do this," she said. "I've missed you two terribly."

"Exactly what 'this' have you missed, Kris?" he asked, his brows drawing
together. "You're the one who quit coming around, who quit eating with us."

"Who quit cleaning your house and helping with your laundry." She could
feel her temper rising at the censure in his tone.

"Don't put words in my mouth. It wasn't what you did that we missed, it
was your presence."

She didn't know what to say to that. So in the end, she said nothing.
But as she turned and started up the stairs, Derek said quietly, "Once
Mollie is in bed, you and I are going to finish this conversation."

Derek paced around the family room, too nervous to sit. Kris was still
upstairs reading Mollie one last story after he'd said good-night, but
she couldn't linger much longer.

He was impatient, which was rare in itself. Normally he was content to
allow the passage of the days, to let events and incidents come about in
their own good time. He also, he admitted, was a master at ignoring
anything he didn't want to face. That was the only reason why he'd
allowed himself, Mollie and Kris to drift along like this for so long.

Kristin was right. They had to move on, one way or another. And the one
way he couldn't countenance was not to have her in his life.

He took a deep breath, blew it out. The more he thought about it, the
more a marriage between them made sense. He wanted it. Wanted her. But
not just for the sex, although he was still stunned at how hot and wild
the passion between them could flare-

"You look as nervous as I feel."

He spun around and there she stood in the doorway. The aqua sweater set
off her fair skin and made her eyes look even greener by contrast. It
hugged her curves and the short skirt showed off her shapely legs,
reminding him of how effectively she'd hidden herself from the world for
so long.

"Why did you do that?" he asked before he could stop himself.

"Do what?" She looked puzzled as she walked forward and took the seat he
indicated on the couch.

He made a general up-and-down motion that encompassed her figure. "You
used to wear baggy shirts and jeans all the time. Now you look...you
look like a woman."

Her face crinkled into amusement but a pretty blush crept into her
cheeks as she laughed aloud. "If that was a compliment, thanks."

He felt his face heat as well, but he said calmly, "Oh, it was. Let me
rephrase that. Now you have curves that drive a man wild just thinking
about what you look like beneath your clothes. That drive me wild," he
amended, looking her straight in the eye.

She looked away first. "Wow." She blew out a breath. "I can't get used
to talking like this with you."

128

He used the opportunity to lower himself beside her, stretching out his
long legs, slipping out of his shoes and crossing his ankles with his
heels propped atop the solid coffee table before them. Kristin was
sitting bolt upright beside him as he slouched down onto his spine, and
he took her by the elbow and tugged her backward, sliding his arm around
her at the same time. Smooth, if he did say so himself.

She allowed him to draw her close but he could tell she was still stiff
and ill at ease, so he picked up the remote off the arm of the couch.
"Want to catch the news?"

They sat in silence for a long while, absorbing the top stories of the
day. It was largely depressing stuff, focused on political maneuverings,
war and civil upheaval around the globe, spectacular fatalities and grim
reports of worldwide illness and famine. After a while, Kristin sighed.
"I'm probably crazy to be considering bringing more children into this
world, aren't I?"

The atmosphere in the room changed instantly but he forced himself to
stay relaxed. She didn't look at him, but kept her gaze directed at the
television, so he followed suit. "Deb and I talked a lot about that,
before we decided to have children," he said. "But I think seeing the
news like this gives you an inflated feeling of pessimism. There's a lot
of good in the world as well. It just doesn't make for great ratings
like the bad stuff does."

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her smile. "Well put. And probably
true."

He took a deep breath. "So...you want children?"

She turned her head and looked straight at him. "I want your children,"
There was a small, electric silence, and she hurried on. "I'd like
Mollie to have at least one sibling. I was an only child and always
envied kids with brothers and sisters. They seemed more like a real
family to me."

I want your children. All he could seem to think about was how they were
going to create those children, and he felt his body stirring and
responding to the images he couldn't shove out of his brain. Then he
realized she was still speaking.

"...thought any more about whether or not you want more kids?"

"Yeah," he said. "I mean, I have, and I think you're right. Mollie
should have siblings. And honestly, I don't just want more children
because of Mollie. I like being a father. I always imagined we'd have
several..." He let the sentence trail off, realizing that it probably
wasn't such a great idea to talk about his first wife to the one he
hoped to marry next, even if it was Kristin, who'd known and loved her, too.

"I think that would please Deb," Kristin said steadily. "She always
wanted a small tribe, remember?"

Relief rushed through him. Kristin understood him, understood what he
was thinking. She always did and he shouldn't forget that. "So," he
said, tightening his arm a little. "We've agreed that we both want more
children. And I've told you how I feel. I don't only want you because of
Mollie, although knowing

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how much you care for her is a great part of the package. So what do you
think?" He turned his body slightly to face her a little more fully.
"Will you marry me?"

A small smile curved the corners of her mouth as he looked down at her.
"Yes."

Relief poured through him. He put his free hand up to her cheek and
cradled her face. "You won't regret it," he told her, skimming his thumb
along the line of her jaw. "We're going to make a good team." Her smile
widened. "We already do." He kept looking down at her, wondering why in
the world it had taken him so long to see how lovely she was. "How soon
do you want to get married?" She shrugged. "I don't know. Soon?" "How
about next Sunday?" Her emerald eyes widened. "As in one week and one
day away?" He nodded.

"Derek, we can't possibly plan a wedding in such a short time!"

"I don't know that we have all that much to plan," he said carefully. He
should have realized that Kristin would be thinking in terms of a real
wedding, with guests and flowers and cake and all the attendant hoopla.
"I'd like to have a simple ceremony," he said, "and unless it's really
important to you, I'd rather forget a reception and all that jazz. I
can't take a honeymoon right away but if I start arranging it now, I
should be able to get away in a couple of months." He and Deb had had a
huge wedding with

scads of family and friends, a ridiculous number of attendants, and a
dance band at the lavish reception. There was no way he could go through
anything like that. It would remind him too much of...of the way his
life was supposed to have been.

Suddenly, he realized Kristin hadn't said a word in response yet. Hell.
Had he completely screwed this up?

But then, as he was frantically trying to figure out how to explain his
feelings to her, she nodded once, briskly, and said, "That's fine."

"It is?" He couldn't keep the surprise from his tone, but he covered it
quickly. "Okay. That's settled, then. All we have to do is get blood
work done and apply for the license." He shifted, pulling her across his
lap as he tried to cover the awkward moment just past. "I don't want to
wait, Kris. I want you in my home."

"I don't want to wait, either," she told him. She put her arms around
his neck as her words echoed between them. He knew she'd been talking
about marriage, but he could see from the sudden awareness in her eyes
that she had caught her unintentional double entendre just as he had.

Slowly, holding her gaze with his, he pulled one of her hands from his
neck and laid his lips against the fragile skin of her inner wrist.
Using his tongue, he tested and tasted his way up her arm, lingering at
the tender fold of her elbow, then sliding his lips farther up to her
shoulder before skimming across the

132

thin strap of the aqua sweater and laying his mouth on her collarbone.

Kristin's head fell back and her eyes closed as her body slackened in
his arms. Her hands moved to clasp his shoulders as he nibbled her neck
and pressed light kisses up the line of her jaw until his mouth hovered
over hers. "Kiss me, Kris," he breathed.

He shifted his supporting arm higher to bring her head up, delighting in
the willing way she lifted her mouth to his. Her lips were soft and
sweet and he leisurely explored their shape for long moments before
flicking his tongue across the seam of her lips. When she opened her
mouth, he moved inside immediately, his tongue tangling with hers in
hot, slick pleasure. As they kissed, her lithe body twisted in his arms,
pressing against the growing arousal that pushed at his pants, making
him all too aware that it would only take a few smooth moves to have his
pants unzipped and her astride his lap.

He shuddered; "I probably shouldn't be doing this," he said. But he
couldn't resist sliding one hand over the enticing swell of her hip. He
smoothed a path down her upper leg to where the short skirt stopped and
uttered a silent alleluia at the feel of her soft bare thigh beneath his
palm.

She placed her hands flat against his chest, palms side by side. "You
can," she whispered, "if you want to."

"Oh, I want to," he said, hearing his own voice come out a deep, rough
growl, "but I don't want to rush you. We can wait until we're married."
A small, ignoble part of him sat up and shouted "No, no, no! but he
disregarded it. He was telling the truth; he didn't want her to regret
anything about their first time together. Still, it was all he could do
to prevent himself from twisting his torso back and forth beneath the
warm pressure of her small hands.

"You're not rushing me," she said obliquely. She wouldn't meet his eyes
but kept them fixed on her hands. A surprising tenderness surged through
him as he realized she was feeling shy. She was shy!

Of all the things he associated with self-possessed, confident Kristin
Gordon, shy probably wasn't anywhere near the top of the list. And
yet...she was looking to him to take the lead.

Another realization swept over him. Kristin might be self-assured and
smart as a whip about most things, but in this arena, he was definitely
the more experienced of the two of them. Experienced... experience.
Carefully, not wanting to spoil the moment, he said, "Kris? I, ah, don't
quite know how to ask you this, but-"

"I'm not a virgin." Her voice was still soft, her eyes still averted.

He couldn't define the emotions that rushed through him at that one
small sentence. Relief, maybe a little. He and Deb had both been virgins
their first time together and it hadn't been a stellar experience for
either of them. He'd been fast; she'd been slow. He knew he'd hurt her,
but had been so overwhelmed

134

by basic adolescent lust that he'd had no hope of making it good for
her, and he'd felt terribly guilty.

Another emotion overshadowed his momentary recall. It seemed almost
like...like jealousy. He tried to tell himself it was fatherly outrage,
but that didn't wash.

"Who?" he managed. "When...?" The thought of some other man touching her
intimately made him see red.

"It was a long time ago," she said softly. "My second year in college.
And not something I was inspired to repeat."

Tenderness swept through him, washing all other feelings away. "Let me
inspire you then," he said. He lifted her from his lap and stood, then
bent and swung her into his arms. She was easy to carry, although she
struggled wildly for a moment before clutching him around the neck.
"Derek! What are you doing?"

"Taking you to bed," he told her, striding from the room. "We're going
to do this right."

135

Eight

Had she known all along that this was how the evening would end? Had her
subconscious picked up on something she hadn't noticed? Was that the
reason for the extraordinary case of nerves she'd been feeling?

As Derek carried her up the stairs and shouldered open the door to his
bedroom at the far end of the hall from Mollie's, Kristin decided to
stop thinking, stop analyzing and simply enjoy. She'd imagined making
love with Derek so many times but her dearth of experience had limited
the scope of her dreams to the basics. Tonight, she wouldn't have to
dream anymore.

It was fast. Probably too fast, in the context of a normal dating
relationship. She would no more think

136

about sleeping with a guy on the first date than she would about flying
to the moon. And under no circumstances would she sleep with a man while
his child was in a room just down the hall.

But this wasn't a normal dating relationship. In actual fact, they'd
never even had a real date. Instead, they'd lived in each other's
pockets for years, sharing the joys and worries of raising a baby girl.
They'd spent hours discussing his business and the sanctuary, had made
snowmen together and sung "Eensy, Weensy Spider" until they were both
ready to scream. They'd shored up each other through times of grief,
celebrated birthdays and shared silly jokes over a sinkful of dirty dishes.

No, it couldn't be further from a normal dating relationship. But it
wasn't fast in any but the most literal sense of the word, either. She
knew him better than she'd ever known any man besides her father. She
trusted him with her body in a way she could never trust anyone she'd
only known weeks or months.

They belonged together. And in just a short time, they would be married.
Married! She still couldn't quite believe it. But as Derek carried her
into his bedroom and gently laid her on his bed, it became real in the
most basic sense of the word. He switched on a small lamp that cast a
dim glow over the room before he came down beside her and she had no
more time for thought as he covered her mouth with his, kissing her with
urgent demand. One of his legs slid over hers, pinning her in place, and
she could feel

his body surging against her hip as his breathing grew short and choppy.
She put her hands to his neck and then slipped them up into his hair,
kneading his scalp and holding him fast to her while his lips left hers
and moved down her neck. He had one arm beneath her. The other lay
heavily on her stomach, and she felt the muscles of her abdomen contract
sharply when he spread his big hand wide, his little finger stretching
down almost to the top of her feminine mound. A sudden surge of
excitement danced through her and she rolled her hips up involuntarily,
moving his finger over her. Her body was throbbing deep between her
legs, aching for his touch and her breast heaved with frustration.

Derek chuckled deep in his throat. "Not so fast. I've been having
fantasies about this for days. I don't want to rush."

Slowly, he slipped his hand up her torso until he had covered her
breast. He didn't move, just held his hand there, cradling her gently.
"You had me fooled," he told her, lifting her head to look into her
eyes. "I didn't have any idea how beautiful your body was. I feel like a
man coming out of a coma and just noticing the world around him for the
first time."

She smiled, raising her torso just the smallest bit, pressing herself
more firmly into his palm. "I had most people fooled, I guess."

"Why?" he asked. "You never answered me earlier."

She shrugged, and the motion moved her breast

138

beneath his hand, sending ribbons of pleasure snaking through her. "I
never cared much what I looked like before. But when you said no to my
proposition'-"

"Your proposal," he corrected her.

"I realized that if I wanted to find a man I was going to have to learn
how to attract one."

He frowned and his eyes darkened. "So you started wearing revealing
clothes, thinking that was the way to get noticed?"

"It worked on you," she said, refusing to let him draw her into an
argument. "So don't be hypocritical." She ran her hands down to his
shoulders and over the heavy muscle of his upper arms, her fingers
lingering to stroke and caress. "Can we talk later?"

He relaxed, a fleeting smile touching his mouth. "Yeah. We can," He rose
to his knees beside her. "Right now. I think you need to get out of
these clothes."

His hands were gentle as he tugged the aqua sweater over her head. She
heard him suck in a harsh breath as his eyes blazed down at her breasts,
and she thanked heaven that tonight she'd had the sense to wear the new
sheer black lace bra and panty set she'd just bought. He placed both his
hands over her breasts, cupping the full mounds and she shivered at the
passion blazing in his blue eyes.

"You, too." she said, although it came out as little more than a husky
whisper.

"Help me." He lifted her to her knees beside him on the mattress and set
her hands at the lop of his shirt placket. Her fingers were actually
trembling as she unbuttoned each button. As she approached his belt
buckle, he pulled the remaining fabric of his shirt out of his pants so
she could continue. When all the buttons had been slipped free of their
moorings, she slowly spread the shirt wide, sliding her palms up his
chest and out over his shoulders until the shirt fell down past his
elbows and he was able to shrug out of the rest of it.

His chest was broad and solid, dusted with a faint vee of dark hair that
arrowed down to his navel and disappeared beneath the waistband of his
jeans. He reached up to his shoulders and captured her hands again,
drawing them down between them and she realized he wanted her to
unbuckle his belt as well. She swallowed.

The one time she'd had sex in college, it had been dark and furtive, and
the guy had left practically as soon as he'd finished. She'd never seen
a naked man's body in her entire life.

And while she understood that he was allowing her to get comfortable
with her own state of undress, she couldn't seem to make her fingers
move. She glanced up at him, and he smiled as he lowered his head and
took her mouth again, pulling her to him and kissing her thoroughly
until the fire inside her was raging again and she was twisting against
his hot, bare chest, wanting, needing more contact.

She felt his fingers at her back for a moment, and then he was tugging
her bra down her arms, tossing it aside. He made a single rough, hoarse
sound and

140

the room spun for a moment as he laid her back on the bed again. His
hands were swift and sure, taking her skirt and panties off in a single
motion, and when she was naked, he hovered over her for a long moment,
his eyes traveling over every inch of female flesh he'd revealed. He
lifted a hand and laid it gently right over the triangle of crisp,
curling hair, and one corner of his mouth kicked up. "A natural blonde,"
he said softly. And then he was gone, moving off the bed to get rid of
the rest of his own clothing.

Kristin lay watching as he stepped out of his pants. He wore stretchy,
snug briefs that did nothing to hide the ridge of arousal beneath and
her pulse raced. He was barely contained by the fabric, and in a moment
he hooked his thumbs in the sides of the briefs and shucked them off as
well. She couldn't look away, couldn't pretend to be matter-of-fact. He
was big, heavily made and if a man could get any more aroused, she
couldn't imagine how. He slowly put one knee on the bed again, and as he
leaned forward, his sex fell against her belly and she jumped. He was
hot and hard, so hard, and without conscious thought she wriggled her
hips beneath him, seeking a satisfaction that eluded her.

Derek lowered himself slowly onto her, pushing her thighs apart and
making a space for himself. The action sandwiched him between their
bodies and she could feel him, firm and gently moving against her belly.
He bent his head to her breast then, and she jumped as his lips closed
over one nipple. He swirled his tongue around the tight peak time after
time, and

just when she thought she couldn't stand the rising tension any longer,
he drew her deeper into his mouth and began to suck strongly at her. She
almost shrieked aloud, her body surging up against him as electric
shocks of sensation ran straight from her breast to her womb. She was
trembling, panting, her legs moving restlessly around his hips.

Derek made a low sound of approval. He shifted to one side and she
opened her mouth to protest his leaving, but the words turned into a
breathless moan of pleasure as his fingers slid up the inside of her
thigh. He brushed lightly over the curls he found there and she was
startled to realize how wet she felt. Then one finger probed deeper,
sliding between her soft folds and her back arched as he suddenly pushed
the digit deep, deep inside her sensitive channel. There was no pain,
only an exciting sense of pressure and an irresistible urge to move
against his hand. He laid the fleshy pad just below his thumb flat
against her and pressed strongly, and she clutched at his shoulders.
"Derek, I want...Derek!" His name became a cry of release as the tight
coil of desire that had drawn together inside her suddenly flew apart.
Her body was out of her control, bucking and surging against his hand,
her back arching repeatedly as her fingers gripped his shoulders. He
touched her relentlessly, pushing her beyond pleasure into a final
paroxysm of climax that left her limp and gasping, too drained to move,
completely shocked by the force and power of her first orgasm. Then,
before she could recover, before she had

142

time to get embarrassed at her own abandon, he drew his hand away and
levered himself over her again. She could feel the heavy length of him
as he drew back on his knees and placed himself directly at the moist,
pouting entrance to her body. Slowly, he flexed his hips, using his
hands to open her to him, and she shivered at the first blunt, probing
contact. He leaned forward, supporting himself on his arms as he pushed
himself deeper.

"Kris."

She looked up at him and was startled by the fierce, intent look on his
face.

"Put your legs around my waist," he commanded.

She obeyed instantly, wrapping her arms around his broad shoulders and
linking her ankles behind his lean waist. The position tipped her up
into an even more intimate contact and she drew in a sharp breath.

He grinned, a mere baring of his teeth, and muttered, "Hang on," and
almost before the words registered, he was moving strongly against her.
gasping as his body arched against her in the throes of his own fulfillment.

When he finally was still, he lifted himself away from her and rolled to
one side. He pulled her against him, kissing her temple gently as she
cuddled close. "You all right?"

She couldn't suppress a smile. "I'm fantastic."

Now it was his turn to grin. "Yeah. You are."

They stared at each other a moment as the smiles faded, and she wondered
at the searching look in his

gaze. Finally, he said, "Thank you for being persistent. And patient."

"You're welcome," she said, equally seriously. Her heart was beating
faster at the tender expression on his face.

"Spoons?" he asked.

She was completely bewildered. "Spoons? What does that mean?"

"Do you want to sleep spoons?" He turned her to her side and curved his
body around hers, pressing her back against his chest and her bottom
into the cradle of his hips. Sliding one arm beneath her, he said,
"Isn't this nice?"

"Yes." Her voice was a whisper. "Very nice." In all her imaginings,
she'd never pictured herself sleeping with him in such an intimate,
loverlike embrace. It was more wonderful than her best dreams. Twisting
her head backward, she stretched up and kissed his jaw. "Goodnight."

He gathered her closer and she could feel him tugging gently at her
unbound hair. "What are you doing?" she asked.

He chuckled sheepishly. "Spreading your hair over us. It's been one of
my fantasies for days now."

She laughed. "Good grief. Just how many fantasies have you had, buddy?"

He kissed the back of her neck, and a sexual thrill shivered down her
spine. "You have no idea, honey."

Kristin woke in the morning alone, and felt vaguely disappointed, even
though she knew Derek

144

was an early riser. Slipping out of bed, she padded into the shower,
noting as she went the little twinges that reminded her of the night past.

He had awakened her in the wee hours by simply stroking his big hands up
and down her torso, teasing her breasts into aching awareness and
eventually moving lower. He'd slid his finger into her and rubbed gently
until she'd exploded in his arms, then he'd taken her yet again before
they'd drifted back to sleep for a little longer.

As she dried off, she studied herself in the mirror. Anyone looking at
her would know something had changed, she thought ruefully. She
was...glowing. And the person responsible for it had already put on the
coffee downstairs, if the smell was any indicator.

Hurriedly, she dressed and ran down the steps. Maybe there would come a
day when she didn't want to be with him every minute she could, but she
doubted it.

He was in the kitchen, absorbed in the sports page and she paused in the
doorway for a moment, drinking in the sight of the man she loved. His
dark hair stuck out at odd angles. She'd seen him sleep before, and she
knew why his hair looked like that. He buried his head in the pillow or
in his arms. It struck her, for about the ten millionth time, how very
unusual their relationship was. She already knew him as well as a wife
of some years, she thought tenderly.

"Good morning." She smiled as she started across the kitchen, intending
to press her body to his and offer him a kiss.

"Morning," Derek sent an abstracted smile in her direction but he didn't
meet her eyes. Before she reached him, he turned away and picked up a
new section of the newspaper, opening it and refolding it noisily to the
page he wanted.

Her smile faded and she automatically detoured to the coffeepot on the
counter to his left. The first moment of puzzlement began to give way to
hurt as she poured herself a cup of coffee and carried it to the table.
He still didn't look up, didn't speak again, and her impatience grew in
direct proportion to the hurt that made her chin quiver despite her best
efforts to

still it.

"Okay," she finally said, setting her coffee cup down with a snap.
"What's going on?"

"Huh?" Derek glanced at her over the top of the

paper.

"Don't pretend you don't know what I mean. You're doing your level best
to ignore me this morning. I thought-I expected-oh, never mind!" She
slapped a hand on the table and rose, uncaring that her coffee sloshed
across the paper he'd laid there.

"Kris, honey, wait." He moved faster than she imagined he could,
grabbing her arm before she could leave the kitchen. "I'm sorry," he
said. "I'm just not used to sharing my morning yet." He wrapped his arms
around her and she let him hold her, burrowing into his embrace and
laying her head on his chest.

146

"You looked like you were a million miles away."

"I was...thinking."

"About what?" The steady beat of his heart reassured her, as did the
warmth of his arms around her and the slow glide of his palms up and
down her back.

His hands stilled. "Deb," he said quietly. "I was thinking about Deb."

Kristin said, "Oh," in a small voice and fell silent. He expected
questions but when she didn't say anything else, he relaxed and let
himself savor the feel of her in his arms.

The moment she walked into the kitchen, he'd realized his error. Deb had
hated his habit of rising early and slipping out of bed to read the
paper, although she'd never said so flat out. She'd just been snippy and
cool when she came down later, and he'd usually beaten a hasty retreat
since he'd assumed that her first-thing-in-the-morning bad mood just
needed time to mellow into her more usual placid temperament.

It wasn't until they'd gone to counseling a year later that he'd found
out how it bugged her, that her bad mood was a result of his behavior.
He'd been happy to change and it hadn't taken much. She didn't want to
get up with him. All she'd wanted was a little nudge and a good morning
kiss before he got up and left her dozing.

How could he have forgotten that? He'd felt guilty as hell so he'd
immediately buried his head in the paper, hoping the moment would pass.
Tomorrow morning, he'd make the effort for Kris.

She was quiet in his arms, and he savored the feel of her soft curves,
marveling at his good fortune. How had he gotten lucky enough to find
this kind of physical compatibility with one of his best friends?
Slowly, he ran his hands down her back to her hips, tugging her more
firmly against him and leisurely rubbing his hips against her, feeling
the insistent rise of desire shorten his breath as his flesh firmed and
filled.

He dropped his head and sought out the soft hollow just beneath her ear,
nuzzling into the warm space, then tugging on her earlobe with light
nips. Kristin shuddered, lifting her face to his and without hesitation,
he took her mouth even as he reached down and put his hand beneath one
of her thighs. She willingly lifted her leg and twined it around his
hips while balancing on the one remaining, opening herself to allow him
to boldly press himself against the warmth of her opened thighs.

He shoved his tongue into her mouth, suddenly feeling a burning need to
brand her. She was going to be his wife. His wife! He hadn't allowed
himself to think about marriage again after Deb-no. He wasn't going to
go there. When he kissed her with renewed passion, she kissed him back
with abandon, but when he reached beneath the little denim skirt she
wore, she said, "Wait. Derek, we can't! Mollie-"

"Never wakes up much before nine," he reminded

148

her. "It's barely seven. But if it makes you feel better..." He lifted
her with his hands beneath her bottom, and as she circled his hips with
both legs and locked her arms around his neck, he carried her across the
kitchen to the bathroom in the front hallway. Once inside, he closed the
door firmly, then turned and leaned Kristin's weight against it. It was
dark and cozy and though he could have turned on the light, he found he
liked the clandestine feeling. He fumbled to pull the little skirt out
of his way- and froze when he realized she wore no panties beneath it.

"Just what do you think you're up to?" he said, laughing and trying to
sound stern at the same time.

She laughed, too, lifting her face for his kiss again. "I don't believe
I'm the one who matches that description."

His amusement faded as he fondled the warm, smooth globes of her
buttocks, exploring the tender flesh in her hidden folds. He made a
rough sound of delight when his seeking fingers encountered slippery
heat, and slowly, he let her slide down to stand on her own feet. He
probed deeper with one finger before withdrawing, spreading the sweet
moisture over her, delving again and again to repeat the process until
she was twisting and crying against him.

He wanted her in every way there was, and though his own body was rigid
and aching with the need to be inside her, there was something more he
wanted to do, something he'd been fantasizing about in hot, erotic
dreams for the past week. Slowly, he lowered

himself to his knees and she clutched at his shoulders. "Derek, what...?"

"Hush," he said. "Let me taste you." "Oh, no," she moaned. She covered
her feminine mound with one hand but he only kissed and nibbled around
the edges of her palm until she relaxed. Then he drew her hand away,
returning it to his shoulders so that both of his were free to press
against her inner thighs and widen her stance. He buried his nose in the
sweet, spicy curls and inhaled deeply. "Ah, Kris, you're beautiful."

He'd said it before and he knew it was inadequate, but it was all his
feeble brain could come up with at the moment. Slowly, taking his time,
he licked a line along the curl-covered folds of tender flesh, tasting
the 'dew he'd drawn forth. As her body gave way beneath his probing
advances, he curled his tongue and thrust deep inside her, then found
the tiny button of her desire and flicked it back and forth
relentlessly, gauging her response in the shifting motions of her hips
and the small cries she made above his head.

He was so hard he ached, and he finally pulled away long enough to rise
and shove down the baggy pajama bottoms he wore and free himself.
Kristin sagged against the door, but he slid his hand down her arm to
capture her palm and drag it to him.

"Touch me," he said in a hoarse whisper, folding her fingers around his
rigid length. Her hand was small and warm and he almost whimpered aloud
at the exquisite sensation as she tentatively began to explore him. He
did groan aloud when she found the

150

small bead of moisture that had already escaped his control and spread
it all around the throbbing head, her tentative touch so thrilling that
he felt like throwing his head back and howling out his pleasure.

"Show me what to do," she implored.

"Like this." He put his hand over hers and began a slow rhythm. He
showed her how tightly to grip him, how fast to stroke, and within
moments she proved so apt a pupil that he was thrusting his hips into
her hand and gritting his teeth as the inescapable conclusion to such
shattering pleasure rose higher and higher. "Wait," he finally choked out.

He pulled her hand away with frantic haste and reached for her in the
darkness, clasping her by the hips and yanking her up and onto him in a
single wild motion. Immediately, he leaned forward, pinning her against
the door. He'd prepared her so well that she came almost immediately as
he thrust deep into her, driving her relentlessly up and over the edge
so that she was arching and crying in his arms as her body rippled with
contractions around him. He couldn't wait, couldn't last, and he let the
dance of passion whirl him into his own release as he came heavily into
her, his weight shoving her so hard against the door he knew he probably
would bruise her. But his body didn't belong to him, didn't want to obey
his commands. He could only cling to Kris and bury his face in her neck
as he poured himself into her receptive body, her arms and legs
anchoring him to the sweet reality of his new world.

He was gasping for air when the world finally

stopped spinning. Slowly he straightened. Kris's legs slid limply down
to the floor but he didn't let her go because she felt as floppy as a
rag doll to him.

"Hey," He had to stop, clear his throat and start over. "Are you okay?"
He could actually feel himself blushing. God, no wonder. He'd acted like
a man marooned on an island for years without sex.

"I'm fine." Her voice was dreamy and soft, and amazingly, he felt a
twinge of renewed desire stir him. It was the first time in his life he
really understood the phrase "ruled by his hormones." His hormones were
very definitely in control. And what they wanted was sex. With Kris.
Anytime, all the time.

Slowly, he lifted her away from him and set her down. He snapped on the
lights and cleaned himself up in a few quick motions, then turned and
gathered a folded pad of toilet tissue. When he dropped to his knees in
front of her, she uttered a startled squeak.

"Wha-?" She tried to close her legs when she realized what he was doing,
but he held her thighs apart with gentle, yet inexorable fingers and
gently blotted her sensitive flesh. Then, unable to resist, he leaned
forward and pressed a kiss to the soft tangle of curls, letting his
tongue lap at her just one time.

She nearly jumped out of her skin, and he chuckled as he rose to his
feet. "We'll get back to that later," he told her in a deep, satisfied
voice before letting her go.

153

Nine

He took her hand and started back to the kitchen, leading her across to
the breakfast nook and drawing her onto his knee. He was supremely
conscious of the fact that she wore nothing beneath her skirt.

"So how did you lose your underwear?" he asked, smiling.

She shrugged, and a pretty pink lit her cheeks. "I guess I just forgot
it this morning."

He laughed aloud. "Well, you can forget any morning. I promise not to
complain."

She smiled. Then she laid her head on his shoulder. "We need to talk
about birth control."

Birth control. Holy unplanned pregnancy. It was several seconds before
he realized he'd spoken aloud. "I never gave it a thought," he said
ruefully. "Deb

never...she had trouble conceiving so we never.,. Is it the right time?"

"Probably not." Kristin raised her head and her gaze was steady and
clear. "I know you said you'd like more children, but I'd rather take
our time and be sure you feel all right with it."

"I'm going to feel all right with it," he said. "But I'd like to have
you to myself for a year or so before we add anyone new to our family."

"All right. I'll take care of it today." She laid her head back on his
shoulder.

She'd take care of it...? "You're going on the

Pill?"

"I don't know. That would be my first choice, but

I'll see what my doctor says."

"Do you mind? Because if you really don't want to, I can-"

"No." She put her hand over his mouth. "I kind of like things the way
they are now, without having to stop and think."

He chuckled. "The Pill's probably a good idea. Thinking doesn't seem to
be something I'm real good at anymore when you walk through the door."

"Good." There was a wealth of satisfaction in her voice.

They sat in silence for a few minutes. He couldn't remember when he'd
enjoyed his morning more. Sitting here, with Kris in his lap, in his
house, was almost perfect.

The moment he thought it, he felt disloyal. His life with Deb had been
perfect. Or close to it. She'd taken

154

care of the house and helped him with the clinic. She'd been the perfect
spouse for a busy young vet trying to establish a practice. Deb had
never wanted to work outside the home, and had looked forward to being a
full-time mother.

On the other hand, he and Kris were going to have some things to work
out along those lines. "Are you still going to want to work?" he asked
her now.

She sat up in his lap and her answer was slow in coming. "Yes, although
I may not open a full-time practice like I've been planning. I want to
be home with Mollie and any other children we have. Once the new
employee for the sanctuary comes on board, I could go back to my old
schedule, working part-time from home."

"You don't have to work at all," he told her. "I'd be happy to support
you if you want to be a full-time mom with no work commitments."

"Oh, no, I have to work." she said. "I mean, I want to work. And that
reminds me-should we establish a joint account for the household
expenses? We could put matching funds into it on a weekly or monthly basis."

He wasn't sure he liked the sound of that. "We might as well just
combine everything," he said. "If you feel the need, you can bank your
entire salary and I'll take care of you."

"No," she said hastily. "I wouldn't feel right about that. Besides, vets
don't exactly compete with human doctors on the salary scale. Wouldn't
one income be a stretch for us?"

He laughed, thinking of just how far his extensive wealth would go
without stretching in the least. He supposed he'd have to tell her about
it one day; but that wasn't something he wanted to get into right now.
"Trust me, we wouldn't have any problems making ends meet."

"Still," she said stubbornly, "I'd rather pay my portion of everything."

He sighed. "Kris, we're becoming a family. Families don't split things
down the middle. They do things together."

She hesitated, and her heart-shaped face fell. "I know. It's just that I
have some financial obligations to conclude first."

Financial obligations? He idly wound one white-blond curl around his
finger as he considered her words. Then he recalled something she'd
said-or nearly said-the other day. What had it been, exactly? She'd been
talking about opening a full-time accounting practice.

"It would be a nice leap in my income level, let me finally get out from
under- Under what?

It sounded very much as though she had debts to pay, although he knew
that couldn't be the case. When she'd insisted on selling her family
home after her father's death, he'd purchased it as close to the upper
end of fair market value as he could without making her suspicious that
he was doing it for her. He'd wanted her to have plenty of money for her
education with some left over for a home of her own.

156

Although so far, she'd lived in a rented town house since graduating
from college.

That was something he had been meaning to discuss with her when he had
time. Instead of pouring her money into rent, she should be paying into
a mortgage for which she would get home ownership in return. Not to
mention the benefits at tax time.

"You know," he said, "that's something I've been wanting to discuss with
you. Why have you been renting instead of buying? I shouldn't have to
tell an accountant the benefits of a mortgage."

She shrugged. "I haven't really had the time or desire to house-hunt."

"Even so," he persisted, "you could at least have bought a town house
like the one you're in. It-"

"Derek." Her voice was soft yet implacable. "Has it ever occurred to you
that one has to have a down payment to buy any sort of home at all?"

"Well, sure," he said, "but you should have plenty of money from selling
me this place."

She tried to rise but he held her on his lap. "I don't," she said.
"After Daddy died I had some...things to take care of."

He was shocked and he let it show. "You mean you have nothing left from
that entire sum? What the hell have you been spending money on?"

Her face froze and her expression warned him he might have gone too far.
"Gigolos. Gambling. And oh, gee, did I forget to mention I have a
serious addiction problem that requires a couple thousand dollars a day?"

"Dammit, Kris," he said, not appreciating the sarcasm, "what's the big
secret? I know you too well to believe anything as ridiculous as any of
that."

"You don't know me as well as you think," she shot back. "You have
absolutely no idea what I've been dealing with since Daddy died."

"I lost someone I loved, too," he reminded her evenly, wondering what in
the hell that had to do with her finances.

"Yeah," she said, "but your someone wasn't up to her neck in debt, was she?"

There was a stunned silence in the room. Kristin's face grew red and her
eyes filled with tears. "Dammit," she said quietly. "I wasn't ever going
to tell

you that."

"Tell me, anyway," he said. He was furious with himself for not being
more attentive to her problems after her father died. Dammit! Paul had
trusted him enough to name him Kristin's guardian in the event of his
death...and he'd let his mentor down. He fought not to turn the feelings
roiling inside him on her, controlling his irritation with her
secretiveness. What exactly had she been trying to prove, dealing with
it on her own?

She sighed. "Daddy had to borrow a lot of money in the first couple
years of the sanctuary to get it up and running the way he wanted. If
he'd lived, I'm sure we would have gotten back onto solid ground,

but..."

"But he died and left you holding the bag," he

finished for her.

158

"It wasn't like that," she flared.

"How could I not have known this?" he wondered aloud. "I was your
guardian, for God's sake."

"You were only my guardian for a couple of months," she reminded him.
"And don't you remember? When I said I'd been handling our bills for
several years, you and Deb agreed that I could continue to do so with
the help of my attorney and our accountant? I managed," she added
defensively. "And after I sold the house to you, I was able to get the
debt down to a very manageable balance."

"It's not paid off yet, is it?" he asked grimly. He had a vivid memory
of the banker who'd arranged the sale of the house nodding approvingly
at the generous amount he had offered for the property. Damned old
weasel. Why hadn't anyone told him how much money she really needed?

"Well, no," she said. "It's not. Not quite. I could do it in a year
working full-time but now I'll just-"

"I'll pay it off," he said. He felt a little sick to his stomach at the
thought of Kristin laboring under what had obviously been a sizable debt
for her entire adult life.

"You will not!"

"Yes," he said. "I will. You're going to be my wife, that means you're
my responsibility."

Her face was red again but this time there was no trace of tears. "The
last thing I intend to be is any man's 'responsibility," she said,
making the word sound like an epithet. "I'll take care of my own problems."

He measured the determination written in her face for a long, tense
moment. She glared at him, her green eyes spitting fire. Finally, he
mentally crossed his fingers behind his back. "All right," he said, "you
can handle your money problems by yourself." And the first thing Monday
morning, he was going down to the bank and pay off the rest of what she
owed. The bank could just tell her they'd made a mistake, or that some
other creditor had paid what they owed her father. It wasn't as if he'd
ever miss such a small amount.

They began packing her things Monday evening. Derek had just taken a
load of winter clothes over to his house while Kristin tossed the
contents of her drawers into a big trunk she'd had since college.

Her flying fingers paused on the T-shirt she was folding and she sank
onto the edge of her bed, hands dropping into her lap. She couldn't
believe how quickly everything was falling into place. Just as he'd
said, Derek had begun the process of acquiring a marriage license
earlier in the day, and they'd made appointments for their blood tests.

It was hard to imagine that only five short weeks ago he'd been telling
her that a marriage between them was a ridiculous notion.

The rest of the weekend had been heavenly. They'd spent the day together
with Mollie on Sunday, and that evening, he'd driven her over to her
town house to pick up clothing for work on Monday. She'd asked if he was
sure he wanted her to move

160

in so quickly, and he'd only smiled. "Mollie and I want you with us,"
he'd said, "the sooner, the better."

Wistfully, she thought that the ideal response would have been a
declaration of love, but she knew that while Derek cared about her, he
didn't love her. He thought of her as a capable housekeeper, a great
baby-sitter and a trusted friend. And as a lover, now. He wanted her, of
that she was sure, but he wasn't about to let his desire for her mesh
with any more intimate feelings.

The telephone rang and she rose automatically. She needed to call
tomorrow to have the service stopped, she remembered as she lifted the
handset. "Hello?"

"Hello, Kristin. It's Rusty. Is it true?" "Is what true?" She tucked the
phone between her ear and shoulder as she returned to her folding and
packing.

"A little bird told me you and Derek are getting married."

"Goodness!" She was truly startled. "There are no secrets in this town,
are there?"

"Oh, you'd be surprised." His voice was amused. "Your news, however, has
gotten around, I would say congratulations but I'm too busy kicking
myself for not talking you into dating me first." She laughed. "Sorry."

"You two sure managed to keep things quiet," he continued. "Even at
Summerfest, no one had any idea you were more than friends."

She was beginning to feel uncomfortable. "I'm kind of tied up here.
Rusty. Was there something you

needed?"

"As a matter of fact, there is." His tone changed, became more
confidential. "I've been thinking about the money that's missing. Have
you pursued it any

further?"

"I haven't had much time since Friday," she said, "but nothing's leaped
out at me. Whatever was done was hidden very carefully."

"I'm really concerned about the sanctuary's reputation as well as
Cathie's," he said. "She's dead. She can't defend herself. I spoke to
one of the bank officers at the Rotary Club meeting today and he alluded
to her being in debt. I couldn't pry without making him suspicious, but
I'm afraid our fears may be well founded. I think Cathie probably took
the money to alleviate some personal problems she was

having."

"Oh, no. I was so hoping..."

"I know. So was I," he said. "But there's no help for it now, and even
if we do go public I doubt we have a hope in hell of getting the money
back."

She sighed heavily, her heart aching. "You're

probably right."

"So I think we should just write it off as a learning experience," he
continued. "I won't tell anyone else what happened and if you don't
either, we can protect Cathie's memory. I'll tell the board that you
feel our current financial system needs more checks and balances,

162

and establish a more stringent way to release funds so no one can ever
do this again."

She felt like an ant in the path of a steamroller. "Maybe that would be
best," she said cautiously. "But what if it wasn't Cathie?"

"If it wasn't, and they try it again, we'll catch them," Rusty said
confidently. "If it was her, it won't occur again and we'll know, right?"

She nodded, then realized he couldn't see her. "I guess so. All right."

"Okay," said Rusty. "If this works, we may not even have to alert
whoever takes the job eventually that there was a problem."

She woke in the middle of the night and immediately her mind turned to
the problem of who had

embezzled the money from the sanctuary. She lay on her side in Derek's
bed, with his big body spooned around her and his hard arm circling her
and she stared into the darkness as her mind raced.

"What's wrong?" Derek's voice from behind her was little more than a
quiet whisper but her body jolted in surprise.

"I was just thinking," she said. "I didn't wake you, did I?"

He yawned. "I'm not sure what woke me. But I could tell you weren't
asleep. What's the matter?"

"I had lunch with Rusty last week and he seems certain Cathie was the
embezzler," she said. She told him about her lunch with Rusty on Friday
and then his telephone call earlier. "But..."

"You don't think Cathie did it?"

"No. That's bothered me from the minute I found the discrepancies. One
of the reasons I've been having such trouble imagining Cathie stealing
from the sanctuary was because of her love for the project. Daddy chose
her because she shared his vision."

"And she didn't need the money, anyway," he

said.

"What do you mean?"

"Cathie came from a wealthy family," Derek said. "She had a trust from
her grandmother that kept her in comfort. Didn't you ever wonder why she
never asked for a raise? In fact, one year while you were in college,
the board tried to give her a raise and she

refused."

"I didn't know that. Why didn't you tell me when I first mentioned my
concern that she might be embezzling?"

"Because I doubted it was true and it wasn't my place to share
information she'd told me in confidence. She didn't want people to
know," Derek said. "I can understand why. When people find out someone's
wealthy, their perceptions of that person

change."

"I suppose," she said slowly, wondering at the vehemence she heard in
his tone, "that could be true." Then she forgot all about what they'd
been saying as a new possibility occurred to her. "Derek! What if Rusty
is the one who took the money?"

"Rusty? Why would he?"

"I don't know," she said. "He has awfully expensive

164

tastes. Do you think his business does well enough to support two
foreign cars, a country club membership, a Rolex and designer suits?"

Derek considered for a moment. "I don't know," he said at last. "No one
I ever knew got rich selling insurance. It's a decent living but..."

"And his family was local," she added. "Not wealthy at all. Quite the
opposite, in fact."

She felt Derek shrug from where he still lay behind her. "It's
possible," he said.

"It would explain why he doesn't want to contact the police," she said.
"That's the first thing I would have done if he hadn't discouraged it."

"Maybe you'd better do it first thing tomorrow," he suggested. "Without
Rusty."

"Maybe he intended to replace the missing money. I bet he never intended
for anyone to know about it, but when Cathie was killed and I found it,
he blamed her."

"Whoa," he said. "That's a lot to assume without any proof."

"Yes, but it's possible, right?"

"It makes sense," he said slowly, and he sounded a lot more awake. "He's
the person other than Cathie who knew the most about the sanctuary's
finances. And serving as the treasurer, he might have had the
opportunity to cook up a false account or two."

"That's what I'm going to start looking for first thing in the morning,"
she said. "So far, all I've done was check and recheck figures to be
sure they all match. Now I guess I'll start looking for anything

fishy."

They lay silently for a moment, then Derek spoke again. "Do you think
there's a possibility that she and Rusty were involved in it together?"

"Not a chance," she said immediately. "Cathie couldn't stand Rusty. She
always said his ego was bigger than the Goodyear blimp." Then a horrible
thought occurred. "Do you think...could he have arranged her accident
somehow?"

Derek's arm tightened around her waist. "I don't know the answer to
that. But now you've really convinced me that you need to get law
enforcement involved tomorrow."

She sighed. "God, this just gets worse and worse,

doesn't it?"

"Yeah," he said. "It seems that way."

She glanced at the clock. "One-thirty-seven. I can't call anyone for a
few hours yet."

Derek pulled her closer, stroking his palm along the curve of her hip in
a comforting gesture. She savored it for a moment, and eventually her
disturbing thoughts receded as she felt him stirring and growing. Her
bottom was nestled into the curve of his body and she squirmed against
him, rubbing back and forth over his rising flesh. His hand crept up to
cup one breast and he gently rotated his palm over her nipple. "You
know, it's a real shame that we're both awake in the middle of the night."

She laughed breathlessly as her body grew warm

166

and lethargic. "Yeah, I wonder what we could do that would help us get
back to sleep."

"We'll have to think of something." Derek's hand slipped down her body
and slid between her legs. He lifted her leg over his thigh, then
trailed his fingers along the widened V he'd made. She gave a broken cry
of pleasure as he brushed over the sensitive feminine folds, touching
her there with deft, careful strokes that gently aroused her. His
fingers were quickly bathed in moisture and as he slid one deep inside
her, she moaned and reached back to pull him hard against her. "What are
you doing?"

"Having fun." His voice was rough and deep.

"I want you-inside me," she panted. "Please?"

"In a minute." His clever fingers wove tiny patterns over her trembling
flesh, seeking out the pleasure point that seemed to be drawing her
whole body into a taut, needy knot. "I want you to come for me first."

"Derek-" But she never completed the thought. A startling wave of
sensation burst through her and she cried out, shuddering and arching in
his arms. She was dimly aware of him touching her again and again, and
yet again, as she was hurled into the maelstrom of her own climax.

Her body hadn't fully quieted when she felt Derek withdraw his hand and
roll her onto her stomach. He slid an arm beneath her and pulled her up
onto her knees and in the same moment, slid the hard column of his
erection into her, pushing his hips hard against her buttocks. The
position angled her up for a shockingly deep penetration and she buried
her face in the pillow as she screamed.

"Am I hurting you?" He stilled at once.

"No," she said, "Oh, no!" She rocked forward and back. "Just move!"

"Oh, yeah." There was strain in his voice and she felt his muscles bunch
and flex. He braced one hand on the bed beside her as he began to slide
in and out of her, thrusting with steady, strong strokes. He pulled
almost completely out, then lunged forward and embedded himself deeply.

She was crying out with every thrust, another level of sweet tension
building and building, and this time when she came she felt the repeated
pulses of his release jetting deep inside her, flooding her with the
proof of his desire. As his taut muscles gave way, Derek slowly
collapsed on her. his weight pressing her into the bed. He kissed the
back of her neck, then rolled slowly aside and gathered her into his
arms again.

"Why the hell did I ever think marrying you would be a bad idea?" he
said above her head. "I've slept better since you moved in than I have
since Deb died."

His arms were possessive, his tone tender, but Kristin's heart shriveled
at his words. It wasn't that she begrudged Deb's place in his life. Or
his heart. It was only that she wanted there to be a little space for
her, as well. But it seemed to her that no matter what she did, it only
served to remind him of his loss,

168

A vivid memory of their discussion of wedding plans played in her head.
She had always envisioned a chapel and a lavish white dress with all
their friends around them, but it had been obvious that Derek dreaded
the notion. She'd seen Deb's and his wedding album. They'd had exactly
that type of traditional affair. So she would do whatever he wanted if
it would help him not to be reminded of what he'd lost. A big white
wedding would have been fun and special, but she wanted him more than
she wanted any silly ceremony. And even though she knew he didn't love
her, she could hope that maybe someday when his heart healed...someday...

She woke when he did in the morning and instead of going downstairs and
making coffee, Derek was almost late for work when she joined him in the
shower. She slipped in behind him and circled his waist with her hands,
pressing her long, lean curves against him from the back while her hands
slipped down to stroke and cup the male flesh at his groin.

He let her take the lead as long as he could, let her fondle and rub and
squeeze, but his self-control, always tenuous in the morning, eroded
quickly. Spinning around, he bent her over the bench at the back wall of
the shower, widening her stance by simply pressing himself between her
spread legs. She was beautiful from this angle as well, the twin globes
of her bottom glistening with beads of water. He tossed the loose mass
of her hair over her shoulder, then positioned himself and slowly pushed
into her, enjoying the sight of her soft pink flesh welcoming him,
loving the feel of her body accepting every inch of him until his hips
were solidly cradling her buttocks and he was buried to the hilt. She
was warm and wet and making little sounds of pleasure and he marveled
yet again at how he could have not realized what he would be missing
without her in his life.

He was happier than he'd been since he'd first learned Deb was sick.
Happier, maybe. The thought made him flinch, but he knew it was true.
Deb had always welcomed his lovemaking but she'd never seemed to catch
fire in his arms the way Kris did, or heaven forbid, initiated
passionate moments. She'd never followed him into the shower, though
she'd gone willingly enough when he'd indicated that was what he wanted.

Deb would have done anything to please him, but he wasn't certain he'd
ever really been able to show her how much pleasure her own body was
capable of. With Kris...he looked down at himself as he thrust in and
out of her, then reached one hand around to search through her nest of
curls until he found the sweet little button he sought. He pressed and
circled and almost immediately, she gave a strangled cry and began to
convulse around him.

He smiled, teeth gritted as he fought off his own finish, but her
pleasure was too much to resist, and he began stroking in and out
faster, harder, deeper, giving himself completely to her. His climax
shivered down his spine and caught fire deep in his groin, surging up
and exploding in heavy, pulsing waves of

170

release as her body milked his length and coaxed the last drops of
desire from him.

"Good morning," he gasped as he slipped out of her.

She turned to him, face radiant, and his heart skipped a beat as he drew
her into his arms. God, she was beautiful. And her eyes... "Kris," he
said before he even knew he was going to speak, "you love me, don't you?"

Her eyes widened and he felt her body tense for a second before she
relaxed again. Her gaze softened as she searched his. "Yes," she said.
"I love you, Derek."

He couldn't hide his relief as he bent to kiss her, and his heart
swelled with satisfaction. "Good," he said. "I was hoping I hadn't read
you wrong." He kissed her, lingering over it. "I need you, Kris," he
said, clearing his throat. "I never thought I'd want another woman in my
life, but now I can't imagine it without you."

He knew he wasn't imagining the pleasure that lit her face at his words
as they finished showering and started their day.

171

Ten

Derek took Mollie to day care after breakfast on his way to the clinic.

"See you at dinner," he said to Kristin. "What are you going to do today?"

"I want to work this morning," she said, "and then I'll go over to the
town house and try to finish packing."

"All right." He kissed her. "I'll see you at supper, I guess. Tonight
I'll help you unpack."

She nodded. "Hope your day goes well." She stretched on tiptoe to kiss
him, then bent to cuddle Mollie. She still felt like she was living a
dream and she smiled as she waved them off and headed into the kitchen
to pour herself a cup of coffee before starting to work.

172

Then she had a thought. It was eight-thirty now. In a short while, Rusty
would be in his office, if he wasn't already. She reviewed her thoughts
from the night before and a grim fury settled over her. If she was
wrong, she would apologize until the cows came home. But she wasn't. She
knew it.

There was a stack of mail that Derek apparently had opened and not dealt
with on the counter a short distance from the coffeepot and she picked
it up. It would be safer and out of the way in his office, so she picked
it up as she moved toward the hallway to get her purse and keys.

She took the envelopes in and laid them in the center of his desk but as
she walked out again, her hip brushed the edge of the desk and a
different pile of papers slid to the floor. Yikes. Clearly, Derek could
use her skills with paperwork, she thought with amusement. She retrieved
all the papers and began to stack them again, idly noting that they were
bank statements.

Behind the letterhead that read Quartz Forge Bank of Pennsylvania, an
unfamiliar logo caught her eye. Manhattan Trust. Manhattan Trust? Hmm.
Weird. Why wouldn't he have all his money at the Quartz Forge bank? She
noted the balance: twenty-seven million, four hundred twenty-eight thousand-

Whoa. That was a mistake. Someone had screwed up the placement of the
decimal point in that figure. She'd better circle it and tell Derek to
call his bank immediately...and then her brain ground to a halt.

She took a closer look at the statement. There were transactions in the
millions in several places. Withdrawals, to be exact. This account had
held over thirty million at the beginning of the month. Twenty-seven
million dollars. Oh, my God.

Her hands began to shake. She felt breathless, and she gasped repeatedly
for air. Derek had twenty-seven million dollars lying around in a bank
in New York City. Then she realized he probably had a lot more than
that. She'd bet anything those sizable transactions were stock buys.

Oh, my God.

Where had he gotten- It didn't matter. He must have been wealthy when he
came here. But why keep it a secret? Her cheeks burned as she remembered
explaining about her father's financial miscalculations, and her
subsequent plan to pay off the debt.

Why on earth hadn't he ever told her? Had Deb known? Then she realized
what a stupid question that was. Deb had known him since they were in
high school together. Of course Deb had known.

Which meant that he'd kept it secret from her, Kristin...and probably
never had intended to tell her.

God, no wonder he'd told her that he'd pay the bills and she could keep
her salary. He must have thought that was hilarious!

Her chest hurt and she realized she was holding her self-control
together by the barest of threads. Forcing herself to take deep breaths,
she carefully laid the statement back on top of the stack. Her hands
were shaking so badly she was afraid to pick up her coffee cup so she
left it where it was on the desk.

174

Then she turned and walked out of the room.

She'd have to pack everything she'd already unpacked. He'd lied to her.
She couldn't live with a man who would deceive her like that.

A sob burst out of her. She clapped a hand over her mouth and sank down
on the bottom steps of the stairway in the hall. All these years, she
had believed she knew Derek so well. She'd clutched all the little
details of his life to her and been so-so smug about how well she knew him.

And all the time she hadn't known him at all.

Why would a man who could live like a king reside in what was a nice,
but certainly not an opulent home? Why would he work? Drive a rather
average American-made car? Questions bombarded her. Was he generous with
his money? Was he a philanthropist-?

The donation. Oh, God, the million-dollar donation the animal sanctuary
had received not long after Derek had come to town. Her father had been
so thrilled, though he'd wanted terribly to thank the donor, who had
remained anonymous.

Anonymous, her fanny. Now she knew exactly who the unknown soul of
generosity had been.

Hurt sliced through her, so sharp and deep that she actually made a
small sound of pain. Why had he hidden this from her? Her thoughts
whirled around and around, making little sense as the hurt grew and
expanded within her. She'd thought everything she'd ever wanted was
within her reach. She had the man she loved and his beautiful daughter.
But he wasn't

the man she loved, was he? He was a stranger. One she didn't understand
at all, and one who apparently liked it that way. One to whom she wasn't
important enough that he would consider sharing the real story of his life.

Tears rolled down her cheeks. She'd known he didn't love her. But she'd
thought, given time and the powerful sexual attraction they shared, that
marriage and sharing all it entailed would bring him around. She'd
thought she could earn his love, she saw, because she'd assumed she knew
him well enough to predict his behavior. Now...what?

What could she do now?

She rose and snatched a tissue from the powder room in the hallway.
Blowing her nose and blotting her eyes, she took a deep, quavering
breath. She'd have to get her act together by the end of the day when
Derek came home because there was no way she could repack and move all
her stuff in one day. That was the only thing she was sure of.

Then she remembered what she'd been about to do. Rusty. That was one
thing that couldn't wait. Because if she was right, she was going to
have to get the police involved.

But if she hurried, run over there right now, she could get it over with
quickly, and then get back here and pack. If she worked hard enough, she
might be able to get most of her things packed again before Derek got home.

Another sob threatened and she hastily spun and

176

headed for the table where her keys lay. Don't think about it. Focus on
Rusty.

She repeated the words like a mantra the entire way to Rusty's office,
and was incredibly relieved to see one of his little European sports
cars parked in its usual spot. If she'd had to wait-and think-she wasn't
sure she could have kept herself from breaking into tears.

Jumping out of her car, she ran up the steps to the landing and entered
the foyer of Rusty's insurance office.

She'd always loved the subdued blue, cream and soft green hues in which
the reception area was decorated, but today she looked at it with fresh
eyes. Both the pictures on the wall were original paintings by a
well-known East coast artist. The patterned rug on the floor was closely
woven and for the first time, she realized it was probably old and
probably had cost a fortune, as had the graceful mahogany furniture that
decorated the entire room. Everything matched. There were fresh flowers
in a sparkling crystal vase on a side table. Baccarat?

"Kristin!"

Her reflections were interrupted by Rusty's voice and she jumped. "Hi,
Rusty."

"I'm not open yet but you're always welcome. Would you like a cup of
coffee?" He looked as perfectly groomed as he always did in an expensive
summer suit with leather loafers and the Rolex she'd seen before.

Was it her imagination or did his eyes look anxious? "'No, thanks. I
just came to talk for a moment. I won't take up much of your time."

"All right." He indicated a small sofa. "Would you like to sit down?"

"Thank you." She took a deep breath as he seated himself in an adjacent
wing chair. Where to begin? How did one go about accusing someone else
of embezzlement and possibly murder? She cleared her throat nervously.
"I, ah, I came to talk more about the missing money."

"Oh." Rusty lowered his voice, tugging at the end of his silk tie. "Have
you found out something about it?"

"I think so." She sat back in her chair. "I believe you stole the money,
Rusty. You're the only other logical choice."

A dull red flush climbed his cheeks. "That's ridiculous. Why would I-"

She waved a hand around the room. "Why, indeed? Appearances are nice but
are they worth going to jail for? If I call the police and tell them
everything I know and what I suspect, will your bank statements and your
past income tax forms bear out all this luxury?" Then she leaned
forward. "Did Cathie know?"

There was a tense silence.

"No." The word slipped out and Rusty sagged in the chair. He passed a
hand over his face. "Although I think she suspected."

"Did you have anything to do with her death?"

178

"No! Of course not." He looked sincerely shocked. "What kind of man do
you think I am?"

"I don't know," she said. A wave of sadness surged. "I don't seem to
know the men around me nearly as well as I thought I did." She rose from
the chair. "Do you want to get your coat and come with me?"

"Come where?" He blinked at the abrupt change of subject.

"To the police station," she said impatiently, starting for the door.
"Where else? You embezzled money, Rusty."

"Dammit, Kristin!" Rusty's voice was frantic. He followed her out the
hallway to the front door. "Look, this can be fixed. Just give me some
time to pay back the money I borrowed."

"You didn't borrow it," she said sternly. "You stole it from a nonprofit
organization doing charitable work. There's a big difference."

"Okay," he said, shrugging. "I stole it." He caught at her hand. "But-"

The door slammed open. "Get your hands up where I can see them!"

The noise and yelling voices were paralyzing and she froze as three
uniformed men suddenly rushed into the room with guns drawn. Guns!
Slowly, she raised her hands in the air, but the officers rushed right
by her and slammed Rusty against a wall. As she gaped in astonishment,
he was searched and cuffed and read his rights.

"Kris." A deep, quiet male voice, a familiar voice, called her name and
she turned back to the doorway as a fourth officer stepped aside and
allowed Derek to enter the room. He crossed to her and took her elbows,
"Are you okay?"

"Of course I'm okay." She pulled free and indicated the police who were
escorting Rusty from the room. "What are they doing?"

His eyebrows rose. "They're taking Rusty into custody for suspected
embezzlement."

"But...how would they know that? Are they sure enough to be arresting him?"

"You mean other than the fact that we all heard you elicit his confession?"

"Other than that," she said tightly.

"I called Walker Glave this morning and told him our suspicions," Derek
said, mentioning the president of the board. "Apparently, Cathie had
come to him the day before she died with information about it and he was
waiting, trying to decide what to do. You were on his list of people to
speak to about it, but when we talked, he decided to go to the police
immediately."

"So the timing of the arrest was coincidental?" That was hard to believe.

"No," he said patiently. "When I realized where you were, I called them
right away."

"How did you know I was going to talk with Rusty?" she asked.

Derek smiled. "Kris, I know you. When something's bothering you, you
tackle it head-on. I was halfway to work when it dawned on me that the
minute

180

I left you alone you'd confront Rusty. And when I realized that, my
blood ran cold. Anyone who is capable of embezzling that much money and
blaming it on a dead woman who can't defend herself might be capable of
a lot worse."

"He said he didn't have anything to do with Cathie's death, that it was
an accident."

"I bet he also said he didn't take the money."

She didn't smile. She couldn't. The phrase "I know you," brought her
feelings of betrayal rushing back full force. When he moved to take her
in his arms, she stepped back a pace without really thinking about it.
"When were you going to tell me about your bank balance?" she asked. "I
thought I knew you, too, but it turns out I was wrong."

His face changed, and her last hope that perhaps it was a mistake and he
hadn't really deceived her died. His gaze flicked sideways at the cop
standing nearby. "Could you excuse us for a few minutes, please?"

"Sure," the officer said. "But don't leave yet. The detectives are going
to want to hear what you know about this guy." He hooked a thumb over
his shoulder to where Rusty sat in the squad car in handcuffs.

Derek indicated a small room just beyond the office, an employee lounge
where Kristin had come before for short meetings on sanctuary business.
She hesitated a moment. The last thing she wanted to do was go into that
little room with him.

Derek must have read her refusal in her face. "Kris," he said in an
implacable tone. "In here. Now."

Her temper flared and she welcomed it. Anything was better than the dull
hurt that gnawed at her in-sides. "I don't want to talk to you." It felt
childish but she was too close to tears to think of something more
sophisticated to say.

"You don't have to talk. All you have to do is listen." Derek took her
arm in an unbreakable grip. He wasn't hurting her but he didn't release
her until he had towed her into the small room off Rusty's office and
shut the door. "Now," he said. "Get it off your chest. You're mad
because you think I hid my wealth from you on purpose."

"You did," she said. "All these years..." She shook her head. "I can't
marry you now."

"What?" If she'd set a match to a dynamite stick, she couldn't have
gotten much more of a reaction. It wasn't a shout, it wasn't a demand.
It was a roar. "Why the hell not?"

"Because," she said. "I'd feel funny marrying a man for his money."

"I didn't think you would," he said. "I thought you were marrying me
because you love me."

She flinched, and didn't speak. What response could she make to that?

"Kris." Derek dropped his voice to a low, intimate register. "Honey,
will you give me a chance to explain? All you have to do is listen.
Then, I promise, if you want to leave you can."

She couldn't look at him. It hurt too much. She

182

was incredibly humiliated that she'd been so wrong all these years about
him. She thought she knew him. Ha! He was a multimillionaire.

"I grew up in a regular middle-class family just like you," he said. "My
mom was a teacher, my dad was an electrician who owned his own company.
When I was a junior in high school, they celebrated their twenty-fifth
wedding anniversary by taking a trip to the Caribbean. They never came
home."

"What happened?" There was remembered anguish in his tone and she wasn't
hard-hearted enough to resist that.

"They were snorkeling when a boat came roaring around a rocky
outcropping and plowed right into them. They were side by side and they
both died instantly." He took a deep breath. "The young man who killed
them was a Saudi playboy, a prince in line for his father's sheikdom."

Her eyes widened. She supposed she'd thought he was going to say
something about insurance money.

"The sheik was furious with his son, but he still managed to avoid
having that damned killer face prosecution."

She drew in a sharp breath. "But that's wrong!"

"Yeah." His laugh was slightly bitter. "The sheik gave my brother and me
each ten million dollars-- like that's supposed to make me feel better
that Mollie will never know how terrific her grandparents were. He also
kicked his son out of line to inherit, which was personally a lot more
satisfying to me than getting any money." He drew a breath. "Anyway,

my brother's a Wall Street whiz and he manages the money for me. I
honestly don't think much about the fact that I'm..."

"Rich?"

"Well, yeah." He tried a tentative smile.

"You were the anonymous donor to the sanctuary."

"Guilty."

She felt the tears well. "You made my dad very happy."

"It made me happy," he said. "Your father had great vision. Without him,
there would be no sanctuary. I just helped him realize his dream a
little sooner than later."

There was a brief moment of silence.

"So," Derek said. "Are you ready to go home now? I'm sure we can talk to
the police later."

"I guess," she said slowly.

"And the other?" A note of uncertainty entered his voice. "Will you stay?"

She couldn't prevent the involuntary, brief shake of her head.

"Why not?" he demanded. "I explained about the money. Kris, you know me
better than I know myself in all the important ways. I should have told
you before but I honestly didn't think about it. We love each other. How
can you walk away from that?" There was a note of naked desperation in
his voice now.

It was a moment before the sense of what he'd said jelled. "We...love
each other?" she said faintly.

184

"Don't we?" Uncertainty shone in his eyes. "You told me you loved me."

"I do," she said softly, "but you never said you loved me."

He looked sheepish. "Of course I love you. It just took me a while to
admit it to myself. I never would have asked you to marry me if I hadn't
fallen in love with you." He paused. "Do you believe me?"

She shrugged. "You want a mother for Mollie. And companionship. And we
share a lot of history. We've been friends for a long time."

"I've been friends with Faye for a long time, too, and I didn't ask her
to marry me," he pointed out.

"A month ago you thought I was nuts for suggesting marriage. I know you
want me now, but I'm not stupid enough to think that sex and love are
the same thing."

"They are for this guy," he said, his eyes very blue and incredibly warm
as he took her into his arms. "I love you, Kris. I didn't want to admit
how empty my life was, but you dragged me out of my cave and loved me
until I couldn't help loving you back. Please say you'll stay and marry me."

She smiled up at him as she wound her arms around his neck. "All right,"
she said. "I'll marry you."

"And love me forever."

"And love you forever."

And as he sought her mouth, she lifted her face to his, all doubt
erased. Derek loved her. She'd waited patiently for him to grieve and
begin to live again.

And all the while she'd quietly loved him, so quietly that she hadn't
even realized it when he'd begun to love her in return. But now, now she
knew. And the future had never looked brighter.

Look for Anne Marie Winston's next book,

THE ENEMY'S DAUGHTER, part of

Silhouette Desire's in-line continuity

DYNASTIES: THE DANFORTHS,

in September 2004.

The captivating family saga of the Danforths continues with

(Silhouette Desire #1567)

When ex-flame Larissa Nelson showed up on

Jacob Danforth's doorstep with a child she claimed was

his, the duty-bound billionaire demanded they marry. A

quickie wedding in Vegas joined Jacob and the shy librarian

in a marriage of convenience...but living as husband and

wife stirred passions that neither could deny-nor resist.

: THE DANFORTHS

A family of prominence... tested by scandal, sustained by passion!

Available March 2004 at your favorite retail outlet.

Visit Silhouette at www.eHarlequin.com