are in a state of sin and should be taken to the priest for confession before their Confirmation tomorrow. But Mam says, I don’t know about the rest of the world but I saved a whole year for Frank’s Confirmation suit and I’m not going to the priest to have him tell me my son is not fit for Confirmation so that I’ll have to wait another year when he grows out of this suit and all because he climbed a spout for an innocent gawk at the scrawny arse of Mona Dooley. She drags me home by the ear and makes me kneel before the Pope. Swear, she says, swear to that Pope that you didn’t look at Mona Doo- ley in her pelt. I swear. If you’re lying you won’t be in a state of grace for Confirmation tomorrow and that’s the worst kind of sacrilege. I swear. Only the bishop himself could forgive a sacrilege like that. I swear. All right. Go to bed and from this day out stay far away from that misfortunate Quasimodo Dooley. We are all confirmed the next day.The bishop asks me a catechism question,What is the Fourth Commandment? and I tell him,Honor thy father and thy mother. He pats my cheek and that makes me a soldier of the True Church. I kneel in the pew and think of Quasimodo locked in the coal hole under the stairs and I wonder, Should I give him the shilling anyway for his career at the BBC? But I forget all about Quasimodo because my nose starts bleeding and I feel dizzy. Confirmation boys and girls are outside St. Joseph’s with their parents and there is hugging and kissing in the bright sun and I don’t care. My father is working and I don’t care. My mother kisses me and I don’t care.The boys talk about The Collection and I don’t care. My nose won’t stop and Mam is worried I’ll ruin my suit. She runs into the church to see if Stephen Carey, the sacristan, would spare her a rag and he gives her some kind of canvas cloth that makes my nose sore.She says, Do you want to make your collection? and I tell her I don’t care. Malachy says, Do, do, Frankie, and he’s sad because I promised I’d take him to the Lyric Cinema to see the film and stuff ourselves with sweets. I want to lie down. I could lie down there on the steps of St. Joseph’s 190