Ah, pension my arse. Sixteen years of age an’ talking about the pen- sion. Is it coddin’ me you are? Do you hear what I said, Frankie? Pen- sion my arse. If you pass the exam you’ll stay in the post office nice and secure the rest of your life.You’ll marry a Brigid and have five little Catholics and grow little roses in your garden.You’ll be dead in your head before you’re thirty and dried in your ballocks the year before. Make up your own bloody mind and to hell with the safeshots and the begrudgers. Do you hear me, Frankie McCourt? I do, Uncle Pa.That’s what Mr. O’Halloran said. What did he say? Make up your own mind. True for Mr. O’Halloran. ’Tis your life, make your own decisions and to hell with the begrudgers, Frankie. In the heel o’ the hunt you’ll be going to America anyway, won’t you? I will, Uncle Pa. The day of the exam I’m excused from work.There’s a sign in an office window on O’Connell Street, SMART BOY WANTEDNEAT HAND- WRITING,   GOOD  AT  SUMS,   APPLY  HERE  TO  MANAGER,   MR.   MCCAFFREY, EASONS LTD. I stand outside the place of the exam, the house of the Limerick Protestant Young Men’s Association.There are boys from all over Lim- erick climbing the steps to take the exam and a man at the door is hand- ing them sheets of paper and pencils and barking at them to hurry up, hurry up. I look at the man at the door, I think of Uncle Pa Keating and what he said, I think of the sign in Easons’ office, SMART BOY WANTED. I don’t want to go in that door and pass that exam for if I do I’ll be a permanent telegram boy with a uniform, then a postman, then a clerk selling stamps for the rest of my life. I’ll be in Limerick forever, grow- ing roses with my head dead and my ballocks all dried up. The man at the door says,You, are you coming in here or are you goin’ to stand there with your face hanging out? I want to say to the man, Kiss my arse, but I still have a few weeks left in the post office and he might report me. I shake my head and walk up the street where a smart boy is wanted. The manager,Mr.McCaffrey,says,I would like to see a specimen of your handwriting, to see, in short, if you have a decent fist. Sit down there at that table. Write your name and address and write me a paragraph ex- 334