oney didn’t come out and flail at her with his stick and yell, Come in  out of it, ye hoor, ye overgrown man-eatin’ bitch. Didn’t you have your  breakfast, you  hoor? Are  you  all  right, Francis?  Come  in. That dog  is a right Hindu, so she is, and that’s where I found her mother wandering  around  Bangalore.  If  ever  you’re  getting  a  dog,  Francis, make  sure it’s a Buddhist. Good-natured dogs, the Buddhists. Never, never get a Mahommedan.They’ll eat you sleeping. Never a Catholic dog. They’ll eat you every day including Fridays. Sit down and read to me. The Limerick Leader, Mr.Timoney? No, not the bloody Limerick Leader. I wouldn’t wipe the hole of my arse with the Limerick Leader. There’s a book over there on the table, Gulliver’s Travels. That’s not what I want you to read. Look in the back for another thing, A Modest Proposal. Read that to me. It begins, It is a melancholy object to those who walk . . . Do you have that? I have the whole bloody thing in my head but I still want you to read to me. He stops me after two or three pages.You’re a good reader. And what  do  you  think  of  that,  Francis,  that  a  young  healthy  child  well nursed is at a year old a most delicious, nourishing, and wholesome food, whether stewed, roasted, baked, or boiled, eh? Macushla would love a dinner of a nice plump Irish infant, wouldn’t you, you oul’ hoor? He gives me sixpence, and tells me return next Saturday. Mam is delighted I earned sixpence for reading to Mr. Timoney and what was it he wanted read, the Limerick Leader? I tell her I had to read A Modest Proposal  from the back of Gulliver’s Travels  and she says, That’s all right, ’tis only a children’s book.You’d expect him to want something  strange  for  he’s  a  little  off  in  the  head  after  years  in  the sun in the English army in India and they say he was married to one of them Indian women and she was accidentally shot by a soldier during some class of a disturbance.That’s the kind of thing that would drive you to children’s books. She knows this Mrs. Minihan who lives next door to Mr. Timoney and used to clean house but couldn’t stand it anymore the way he laughed at the Catholic Church and said one man’s sin was another man’s romp. Mrs. Minihan didn’t mind the odd drop of sherry of a Saturday morning but then he tried to turn her into a Bud- dhist,  which  he  said  he  was  himself  and  the  Irish  would  be  much better  off  in  general  if  they  sat  under  a  tree  and  watched  the Ten Commandments and the Seven Deadly Sins float down the Shannon and far out to sea. 176