"Ethan, is that you? Ethan!"
Ethan Wilde turned from the trunk of the rental car, slinging his long duffel bag over his shoulder. He barely had time to register the woman's presence before a small, warm female figure hurtled into his arms.
He staggered backward a step, his arms coming up to catch her reflexively. His heart began to beat faster as he recognized the unique scent of the one woman he'd never forgotten: Lindy Melton. Just the woman he'd wanted to see, and here she was in his arms before he'd even gotten into his old house. Maybe this trip hadn't been such a stupid impulse after all.
"I can't believe you're here!" Lindy said. "I figured you were never coming home again."
She wore her hair in a too-severe grown-up twist now instead of the bouncy ponytail of high school years, but he'd know her anywhere. Behind her glasses — small rimless ones instead of the big bug-eyed violet ones she used to wear — her eyes were the same changeable shade of gold and green. Her skin was still the smoothest, satiny-looking skin he'd ever seen on anything other than a peach and her face was still a delicate heart shape with a jaw that was just a bit too firm for her to be the quiet wallflower that everyone assumed she was.
"Lindy." She had been his neighbor all through his childhood. They'd been best pals since kindergarten, or at least, they had been until junior high, when she'd started to back off from the bad boy of Bell Gap. She'd been the one person who could rein him in from some of his worst ideas. Even so, they hadn't called him Wild Man for nothing.
"I've missed you," he said. It was a gross understatement. He took a deep breath, knowing he needed the answer to the most important question first. "Is there a husband around who's going to give me a knuckle sandwich if I kiss you hello?"
She rolled her eyes big eyes. "Are you kidding? There's no husband."
Still holding her, he leaned back and studied her face for a moment. Then he dropped his head and gave her a quick, correct peck on the cheek. Lindy. He hadn't been able to get her out of his head since he'd gotten the invitation to their ten-year class reunion two months before. Before that… he'd thought of her too often. But because he was the biggest coward this side of the Mississippi, he hadn't ever gotten in touch.
"Are you home for the reunion?" he asked. She was still slender, still slim and too-inviting in his arms. Not that she'd invited him to do anything like this in high school. He hadn't been this close to her since… the Valentine's Day dance in seventh grade. And his mother's funeral six years ago, when she'd hugged him. Twice.
"I still live here." She was busy pushing herself out of his arms and tidying her skirt, her narrow, graceful hands moving restlessly as she indicated the house behind her. "I'm the librarian now."
Ethan chuckled, absently wondering what she'd have done if he hadn't let her go. The job was a perfect fit. "The librarian." He shook his head. "I should have put a bet on that before I left town," he said.
She made a small pout of dissatisfaction. "Was I that boring?"
He'd swear her voice quavered, and he quickly tried to amend his bald words. "That wasn't what I meant. You're the smartest woman I've ever met. You were the class valedictorian. Makes sense to me that you'd find your niche helping other people to appreciate books."
Her expression lightened. The sudden smile that stole across her face was so stunning he simply stopped and stared. He'd always thought she was the most quietly beautiful woman he'd ever known and it appeared she hadn't changed. Clearly, neither had he, he decided ruefully as his heartbeat kicked up a notch.
"That might be the nicest thing you ever said to me," she told him.
He pretended shock to hide his reaction. "No way. When you fell and skinned your knees chasing me home in second grade, I told you your scabs were terrific."
She laughed, displaying a small dimple and straight white teeth. "I've missed you, too, Ethan. Nobody else could ever make me laugh like you could."
Great, he thought. Just what he wanted to be — the guy that made her laugh.
"So how's your dad?" he asked. Lindy's mother had died when she was small and she'd been raised by her father, a stern man decades older than the fathers of most of their friends.
Immediately her face clouded over. "Daddy passed away last year," she said.
"God, I'm sorry. If I'd known, I'd have come home." Impulsively he reached out and squeezed her hand. His own mother had died in a car accident six years ago. It had been the last time he'd been back to Bell Gap, the last time he'd seen Lindy. She'd made the arrangement for his mother while he was unavailable in Brazil but once he'd flown in, she'd faded into the background and made herself quietly indispensable taking care of a million small details.
Lindy nodded. "Isn't it weird that we're both orphans?"
"Yeah." He shrugged. "Stuff happens." Then he smiled at her again. "So tell me about the reunion. Who's in town?"
And just like that, her expression closed up. "I really don't know," she said stiffly. "I'm not planning to attend."
"Why not?" he demanded bluntly.
"I… it doesn't… oh, fine," she said, "if you want the real truth, here it is: the man I was engaged to ditched me for Mandy Briggs, and I don't particularly want to go and spend a whole evening feeling totally humiliated."
She'd been engaged. He was unprepared for the denial that reverberated through him, though he tried to keep his voice steady. "Mandy Briggs. Cheerleader? Bleached blonde? Big, ah, attributes?"
As he'd intended, he'd made her smile again. "Yes, yes and most definitely yes." She grimaced. "I couldn't compete with that."
He guessed she meant men preferred women with hooters the size of watermelons. "You don't need to," he said. "You're ten times more interesting than Mandy Briggs."
Her eyes narrowed and she shot him a skeptical look. "You didn't seem to think so in junior high."
"You can't judge a man by his behavior during adolescence," he informed her. "It takes us a while to figure out that our brains aren't in our pants."
To his relief, Lindy smiled. "And some are faster learners than others." She glanced past him to the car he'd just crawled out of. "Did you come alone?"
"Yeah. No family ties yet."
"Well, welcome home." Her eyes flickered away from his.
He felt like he was boxing shadows. What was she thinking about? Then he remembered the original topic of conversation. And just like that, he realized what he was going to do. He'd come here hoping to see her at the reunion, maybe have a neighborly chat across the back fence if he were lucky. He'd kept his expectations low.
"Why don't you go to the reunion with me?" he suggested, trying to sound casual. It was Fate. And he wasn't one to spit in the eye of Fate, not after some of the things he'd seen.
Lindy's eyes widened. "Oh, no, I couldn't — you don't want to —"
"I do." He reached out and took her hand, ignoring her obvious start of surprise. "I might not remember anyone after ten years away."
"Right. We're twenty-eight, not eighty-eight, Ethan."
"I'd really like it if you were with me." He smoothed his thumb over the soft skin on the back of her palm.
Still she hesitated. "I'll think about it."
He nodded. It wasn't the most satisfactory answer, but he sensed that if he pushed her, she might back off even further. "Okay."
"I'd better let you get settled in." She slipped her hand free and started to back away, then stopped again.
When she didn't speak, he lifted an eyebrow.
"Would you like to come over for dinner around six?" Her words were rushed, as if she needed to get them out before she changed her mind. "If you don't have plans, that is?"
See you at six.
Lindy took a deep breath as she drizzled herb butter over the marinated chicken and pushed it back into the oven. Her heart had been doing a happy dance for the past two hours, ever since she'd seen Ethan Wilde step out of that car. At first, she'd thought it was her lonely imagination working overtime. But he was real. And even better, he was coming over for dinner!
She took a deep breath, willing the butterflies in her stomach to settle. He'd asked her to go to the reunion with him. In fact, he'd seemed quite insistent. If she didn't know better, she'd almost let herself believe there had been a gleam of… interest in his eyes.
Ethan. She poured a glass of white wine and swirled it dreamily. He'd been her fantasy since she'd grown old enough to look at him as a man instead of a childhood pal. But he'd been handsome and popular, a bad boy who drew girls like the library's annual picnic drew flies. She'd been a studious little geek, the very last girl he'd ever have looked twice at. It had been too painful to watch him with girl after girl after girl, so she'd gradually faded back more and more. By the time they were sophomores in high school, they'd moved in such different circles she'd been lucky to catch daily glimpses of him in the halls at school.
She'd lived for those glimpses.
But now he was home after ten long years, if she didn't count his mother's funeral. Still single, her heart reminded her. It was a sign, she decided. A sign that the crazy thoughts that had been swirling around in her head ever since she'd received that invitation to her ten-year high school class reunion weren't so crazy after all. Last week, she'd promised herself she wasn't going to die a virgin, even if she never had another proposal of marriage in her life. And although she'd meant it, she hadn't had any idea how to go about changing her status at the time.
Now… now Fate had intervened. An opportunity had presented itself and she was going to take her courage in both hands. If Ethan wanted her to go to the dance with him, he was going to have to do her a favor, too. Her whole body clenched in involuntary reaction as she dared to think it: she was going to ask Ethan to make love to her.
"You want me to what?!" Ethan whirled around from the rail of Lindy's deck, where he'd been studying her riotously blooming flower gardens.
She stood in the middle of the deck, tiny feet planted side by side, hands clasped demurely in front of her. Her face was the color of the red roses that climbed one of the porch pillars, but her eyes were steady and her words were anything but demure. "I don't want to be a virgin anymore. I would like you to help me change that condition."
He was going crazy. She couldn't have said… but she had, in a ridiculously prim little way that told him she wasn't kidding about either her virginity or her desire to lose it. Ethan's body wasted no time in rising to the challenge, but he forced himself to ignore it. "Why?"
Her eyebrows snapped together and she frowned. "Why what? How many men would question a proposal like this?"
He stalked toward her. "Plenty. Now talk."
Her lower lip came out in that adorable pout she'd made earlier in the day. He felt his breath quicken as he wondered what it would be like to touch his tongue to that full lower lip —
"All right." Lindy retreated as he closed the space between them, dodging around the small glass-topped table. Now it was her turn to look away. "I'm not exactly an object of lust," she said in a barely audible voice.
"That's not —"
"It is true," she said sharply. "In high school, you didn't even know I was alive."
Ethan stopped in his tracks, too shocked to respond to that. She thought he hadn't been interested? Good God. How blind could a woman be? He was sure he'd given her plenty of signals. But she'd just stuck her head deeper into her books and ignored him.
"I don't blame you," she said more softly. Her hands plucked restlessly at the sedate skirt she had changed into. "I'm nothing exciting to look at. And that's the problem." She swallowed and raised her gaze to his. "I'm a virgin. I'm twenty-eight years old and my single chance at marriage didn't make it to the altar. I don't want to live the rest of my life without knowing what it's like to make love."
He didn't know what to say. He was fairly sure that if he told her she excited him and always had, that the mere thought of being her lover had him as hot and bothered as he'd been back when he was a randy teenager, she'd accuse him of making fun of her and send him away. He could hardly believe it, but the ring of truth in her tone convinced him she wasn't kidding. Lindy was smart as a whip. She was pretty in a quiet, understated way that the Mandy Briggs of the world would never be, but she thought she was plain. Plain. He couldn't believe it.
Carefully, he said, "Are you sure, Lin? Your virginity might be a precious gift to the right man some day. I don't think you've thought this through —"
"You don't want me." Her eyes shone pure emerald through the tears that welled and began to make silent tracks down her cheeks. "It's okay, Ethan. Can we just forget I ever brought up this stupid topic? I'm sorry for embarrassing you." She turned away from him and he saw her small hands clench on the rough wood of the rail.
He wanted to shout Whoa, woman! Let's find the nearest mattress! But as hard as it was to accept, he realized she truly despaired of her appeal.
Crossing to the railing, he stepped up behind her and set his hands on her slender shoulders. The muscles beneath his hands felt like the knotted rope he'd carried on his descents into the diamond mines and he gently massaged them as he spoke into her ear. "If you're sure it's what you want, I'd be honored to be your first lover." Merely saying the words aloud sent a shiver of pure sexual anticipation running down his spine. What would it be like when he actually had her bare and blushing in his arms?
Lindy went still beneath his hands. "Are you sure? Because if you don't want to you won't hurt my feelings —"
"If I don't want to?" He couldn't prevent the note of honest incredulity in his voice, but he didn't care. He slid his big, rough hands down her arms to her much smaller ones, lifting them carefully from the railing. Turning her, he set her hands at his shoulders and slipped his arms around her, drawing her soft, slim frame up against his, shifting her so that his hardening body was cradled in the sweet vee of her thighs. It was such an exquisite realization of his wildest dreams that he had to close his eyes and take a deep breath before he could continue. "Does this feel like a man who doesn't want you?" he asked hoarsely.
"What —" Her eyes widened. "Oh!"
Ethan chuckled, grimly hanging onto control. She was so innocent. How could she have stayed that way for all these years? Slowly, he reached up and took her glasses off her straight little nose, setting them on the table beside him. "I'm going to kiss you," he informed her, looking down into her face so tantalizingly close to his.
"A-all right." She immediately closed her eyes and tipped her face up to his.
A surprising wave of tenderness swept over him. He started to lower his mouth to hers, but he got sidetracked by the sweet little shell of her ear. He nuzzled her there, pressing small kisses against the tender flesh, drawing her earlobe into his mouth and gently sucking and nipping until her hands slid up the back of his neck into his hair.
He pulled her more firmly against him, cradling her head against his shoulder as he worked his way from her ear to her temple. He slid his open mouth down along the fine line of her jaw. "Do you know," he murmured against her skin, "how many years I've wondered what you taste like —" He nipped just beneath her jaw and felt her shudder — "right here?"
Lindy made a small sound in her throat. Her fingers clenched in his hair and he allowed her to drag his mouth to hers. As his lips settled over hers, he traced the gentle bow of her lips with his tongue, then urged her mouth open, slipping his tongue into her, abandoning his careful caresses and plunging deep after the sweetness she offered.
Her response was instantaneous. He felt her go boneless as her body sagged against him, completely surrendering to his control, and he felt an incredibly politically incorrect surge of pure male possessiveness.
Lindy was going to be his.
With a slow, sure touch, he ran one big palm over her back and around her torso to cover the soft, warm mound of a breast —
And Lindy jerked away from him with a startled sound, her eyes wide, the pupils expanded so much that they looked almost black.
Good God in Heaven. He'd completely forgotten about the need to go slowly.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pull away." The words tumbled out as Lindy stepped toward him again. She gestured helplessly. "You just startled me a little."
Despite his discomfort, he had to smile. He was huge and hard, so aroused that it was actually painful to release her and step away, but he forced himself to do it anyway. "We're not going to jump into bed tonight." His voice sounded like a stranger's, dark and rough, and he wasn't sure who he was trying to convince, her or himself.
"You're — uh, we're not?" Her tone was dismayed. Her mouth was red and swollen, her eyes still soft and dark.
He knew just how she felt and his hands curled into fists with the effort it took not to reach for her again. "No," he said firmly, "we're not. I'm not rushing you into this. A woman's first time should be special. Memorable. And I don't mean in the back seat of a car," he added, forcing a grin.
She still looked dazed, though she smiled slightly. Her mouth was slightly open, her breast heaving as she touched the tip of her tongue to her top lip in a seductive motion he was pretty sure she didn't even realize she was making. "So, um, when are we going to…?"
But he shook his head. "That's for me to know and you —" He couldn't resist a quick kiss on the end of her perfect little nose — "to find out in good time."
Lindy worked the next day as usual, although she was sure her feet never touched the ground once. Ethan was home…and they had a date for the reunion…and he was going to — they were going to — make love. Her honest nature balked at that one a little. After all, Ethan was going to teach her about sex. Their agreement had nothing to do with love.
That thought slightly deflated the bubble of anticipation and happiness that threatened to burst right through her skin.
Don't be silly, she lectured herself. Yesterday you were resigned to being the old maid librarian of the town. But yesterday, she realized, she'd thought Ethan had left Bell Gap forever. Her heart had been in storage most of her life, because she'd never wanted to give it to anyone.
Except Ethan. The truth was a brutal blow. How long had she been dancing around it? Ignoring it? She'd probably have continued on in stoic avoidance mode until they carried her away in a pine box if he hadn't come back to Bell Gap —
"Belinda, there's someone to see you." Her youngest assistant poked a head into her office, where she'd been looking over the children's librarian's wish list for the next fiscal year. "And he's totally hot."
Lindy's pulse doubled. But before she could say anything, she heard a bellow — a loud, completely unlibrarylike masculine voice — calling her. "Lindy? Help! Get out here and save me."
Hastily she rose and stepped into the area behind the desk. Ethan stood in front of the checkout counter, his hands folded gravely in front of him like a chastised child, while Miss Flora Giddings stood in front of him shaking one gnarled finger vigorously beneath his nose.
"I knew you were that Wilde boy the minute I saw you step through the door. You were the scourge of my tomato patch once upon a time. Hope you've changed, because I've got a load of buckshot waiting to greet you if you haven't."
Ethan was grinning, the engaging aw-shucks grin that made his dimples dance and his blue eyes twinkle. He gave Miss Giddings the full effect of his attention, and his blond hair, left just a little too long to be conventional, caught the light and gleamed like an angel's halo each time he nodded his head. Some angel.
"Miss Giddings. I thought I had changed until you mentioned your tomatoes. Nobody in Bell Gap grows better tomatoes than you."
He continued his smooth patter until Lindy was astonished to hear the grouchy old Giddings widow offering to give him a bag of tomatoes if he stopped by. She shook her head in reluctant amusement and Ethan raised his head then, distracted by the movement. Their eyes meet, caught, and held, and suddenly the room seemed too small, the air too thin, her clothes too restrictive on her oversensitive skin.
"Lindy." Ethan could talk, which was beyond her for the moment. He glanced at his watch. "I came to walk you home when you get finished here."
She checked the clock on the wall and almost sighed with relief. Eight o'clock. The library was open late on Tuesday and Thursday evenings, and the day had seemed interminable. Then his words registered. He'd come to walk her home! She smiled at him. "I'll be just a minute."
Five minutes later, she locked the door of the library behind them and smiled up at him. "It's nice of you to come down here."
Ethan reached for her hand, sending a shock wave of want deep into her belly. His big hand engulfed hers, the skin tough and callused, so utterly male. "I didn't like the idea of you walking home in the dark."
Lindy smiled with real amusement though her heart stuttered at the possessive note in his voice. "I've done it for years."
"Yeah, but now I'm here and you don't have to."
"It's pretty safe, Ethan. You're in Bell Gap, remember? People still sit on their front porches here."
"Sorry. I haven't been anywhere where people look out for each other like they do here in a long time."
"No?" She'd like to know more about where he'd been, what he'd done. "Where did you go? Nobody ever knew."
Ethan slowed his pace. "I was in Brazil for about 18 months after I first left here. Hunting diamonds."
"Ever find any?"
He turned his head and looked down at her and she could just see the flash of his grin. "A few."
"What's a few?" She sensed he was teasing her.
"Enough to buy my own mine. Sold it last year for a nice profit."
Lindy stopped walking. "Are you serious? Then you're — you're —"
"Rich." His voice was definitely amused now. "Yeah. I could buy every house in Bell Gap and have money left over."
She cleared her throat. "Bell Gap must seem pretty provincial to you now."
"No." He looked down at her and his gaze was serious. "Bell Gap seems too good to be true. In the diamond mines, men's lives aren't worth a lot. Accidents are common. Fights are daily occurrences and more often than not, somebody winds up dead."
She shivered at the flat recital.
"New York is a walk in the park compared to diamond mining, but there's no community, no neighborly spirit. If you get mugged, I guarantee at least half the passersby will avert their eyes and keep right on going."
"You live in New York now?" The only time she'd ever been to New York was with the high school band when they marched in Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade.
He nodded. "I've been there for about seven years. I have a firm that imports diamonds."
Imports diamonds? He imports diamonds for a living. Well, no, she thought, not for a living. Because he was wealthy enough that he probably would never have to work again unless he wanted to. Their lives couldn't have been more different now. She couldn't begin to compete with the slick sophistication of the women he would be surrounded with every day. Her spirits, so high a moment ago, plunged into a dark abyss of disappointment.
Then, as if he'd divined her thoughts, he said, "I dreamed about you for years, you know."
Cautiously, she repeated, "About me?"
He raised their linked hands and kissed her knuckles. "About you."
She wanted to ask him to elaborate, but her innate reserve just wouldn't release her tongue. He probably hadn't meant it in the flattering way she hoped.
Predictably, their walk took forever because Ethan was recognized repeatedly by both friends and former foes. "Wild Man!" she heard over and over as cronies from his hell-raising days caught up.
"Remember when you sat on top of that telephone pole for three days to win that bet?"
"Old man Truitt damn near took your head off with that baseball bat. Good thing you ducked or you'd be a memory now."
"You wouldn't recognize Chrissy Lestin if you fell over her. She has five kids now — can you believe it?"
They walked on. "So," said Lindy as the rows of houses gave way to a long shady street where enormous old oaks blocked the streetlights and shadows were thick and deep. "As you can see, this place doesn't change a whole lot. We've got Internet service providers but it's still the same little town that has a living crèche in the town square at Christmas."
"I like it." He turned to face her, setting his hands at her waist. "Lindy, I know you think I'm different, but I'm still the same Wild Man you remember."
"Ethan," she said breathlessly.
"What?" He began to walk her backward.
"You were always Ethan to me." A moment later she felt the rough bark of one of the solid trees at her back, halting her motion.
Ethan kept coming, though, and slowly, slowly, he pressed his weight against her, trapping her between the tree and the unyielding strength of his big body. He lifted his hands and plunged his fingers through her hair, scattering pins and wrecking her tidy twist. Her hair cascaded over her shoulders and down her arms, and once again he put his hands on her, though this time he lightly gripped her hips.
"I thought about this all day." His voice was a low growl. "About how you made that little sound in your throat." He paused, so close that she could feel the sweet whisper of his breath against her cheek. "I want to hear that noise again."
Then his mouth rocked onto hers and she couldn't think. All she could do was clutch the iron-hard muscles of his shoulders as his tongue invaded her mouth until her toes curled up in her summer sandals.
His hands stayed at her hips as his mouth plundered hers, and she began to twist restlessly against him, feeling an almost desperate desire to have his hands on her aching, throbbing breasts. Last night he'd wanted to touch her there. Did he still?
Tearing her mouth from his, she panted, "You can…touch me."
He stilled, though he didn't move away. "I am touching you," he said in a low, gravelly tone.
"I mean," her fingers brushed lightly over his, "where you touched me last night."
He still didn't move. "Where's that?" He took her hand lightly. "You'll have to show me."
Ethan looked down at Lindy. She seemed dazed by the sensual promise implicit in his low voice. She hesitated, and he registered the moment when she realized what he wanted. Slowly, she leaned her head back against the tree trunk, closing her eyes. Amusement floated at the edges of his consciousness. How a woman her age, who looked the way she did, could be so completely unused to a man's touch was beyond him. The men in this town must be blind.
She raised the hand he still held, and his attention focused on her upturned face. Her eyelids fluttered, her lips were softly parted and her breasts rose and fell with the quickened pace of her breathing. It was all he could do not to haul her into his arms but he wanted her to feel safe with him. To trust him.
Turning her hand over to guide his, slowly she pulled it up and in, between their bodies until finally, finally, she spread his palm flat over her breast.
They both sighed, and he felt her body relax.
"You want me to touch you here." Ethan lightly traced a circle around her breast, then brushed his thumb lazily over the sensitive peak.
She inhaled sharply. "Yes."
He brought his other hand up then, and while he continued those easy, desire-fueling caresses, he deftly unbuttoned her blouse. On the dark corner of the deserted street, he knew no one would see. He tugged it free of her skirt and spread it wide to expose her plain white bra. "Ah," he whispered. "Sweet. Do you know what I want to do?"
"Wh-what?"
"I want," he said, "to kiss you right here." He slipped his palms inside her bra and cupped her bare breasts, and she made a soft sound in the back of her throat. His big hands easily covered her and he loved the firmness of her small, taut breasts in his hands. But she had tensed again, and given her comments yesterday, he was pretty sure he knew why.
Ethan leaned forward and lightly kissed her mouth as he rotated his palms over her breasts. "You are perfect," he whispered. He trailed his mouth down the line of her jaw and as he kissed her throat, he felt her swallow.
"I'm not," she said in a low, dull voice. "I'm…flat."
He couldn't help smiling and he wondered if she felt it against her skin. Gently, he cupped her breasts and lifted them free of her bra. "Flat," he said, "you definitely aren't." He kissed the base of her throat, then slid his mouth down the midline of her chest until his face was directly between the two warm mounds. "Shall I go left," he whispered, "or right? Your choice."
He felt her body heave as she chuckled. "Some choice." But her voice was thready and she lifted one small hand and laid it against the right side of his face. He willingly moved to the left, licking a steady path around her, slowly decreasing the circle until he closed his mouth over her nipple.
Lindy arched against him as he drew on her gently, suckling and tonguing the turgid peak. Her hands speared into his hair and she held him against her.
God, he wanted her. For one insane instant, he actually considered dragging her around behind the big old tree, and the very notion was enough to draw him up short. Her first time was going to be somewhere private and comfortable. Somewhere she could shed her inhibitions, let down her hair, and be the woman he was sure lurked beneath her demure, buttoned-down façade.
With genuine regret and a minor adjustment of the uncomfortable fit of his pants, he slowly drew his mouth from her, carefully pulling her bra into place and rebuttoning her blouse. He left it untucked. With her hair down, no one could see much of her upper torso anyway.
Lindy stood still and pliant. She'd opened her eyes when he'd stopped kissing her, and her gaze was wide and dark in the shadow of the tree. "You didn't have to stop," she said.
"Yes," he said positively, "I did. Or you'd be up against that tree with your legs wrapped around my waist."
Her eyes widened in shock.
"Come on," he said, taking her hand again. "Let's go watch old movies and neck."
Lindy laughed and the sound was music to his ears. "Sounds like a plan."
He courted her. That, she decided, was the only word for it. On Wednesday, a ridiculously large bouquet of delicate, fragrant freesia arrived at the library for her in the morning. The tiny card tucked among them read: These reminded me of you. That was it.
He strode in again just before closing.
At the front desk, Lindy forced herself to greet him with the same calm friendliness she showed to the rest of the world. "Hello. Thank you for the flowers." She allowed herself to smile at him with just a shade of intimacy. Last night, they'd made popcorn and watched movies, and he'd talked about his business. She would have welcomed more of his dizzying kisses but he'd been surprisingly restrained, leaving her at 11:00 with only one last kiss at the door.
"You're welcome." Before she fathomed his intent, Ethan reached for her chin, leaned forward and touched his lips to hers in a brief kiss.
One of the other librarians giggled, and Lindy shot him a look that promised discussion later. "It's five o'clock," she announced. She followed the last patrons to the door and locked it behind them. "See you in the morning," she said to her staff as everyone gathered their things and headed for the back door they normally used.
After a flurry of farewells, everyone was off. Lindy turned to Ethan, who stood patiently behind her. "What was that?" she demanded.
"What?" His tone was pure innocence. The same tone he'd used when the principal had accused him of putting tadpoles in the faculty lounge water cooler.
"You know what," she said, narrowing her eyes. "That kiss."
"Too short," he pronounced. "How about we try it again and triple the contact?"
"Not here," she said immediately.
"Why not?"
"Because," she said, "I am not planning to provide this town with tomorrow's gossip."
"Lindy —" his tone was patient "— I think they've seen people kissing before."
"Yes, but they haven't seen me kissing before." Was she crazy, telling the object of her whole life's desire that she didn't want to kiss him?
"Good." The single word rang with satisfaction. "May I hold your hand?"
She sighed. "Of course."
"So I take it you have held hands in public before?" He twined her fingers with his and they started walking.
"No," she said, "but there's a big difference between kissing and holding hands."
His eyebrows rose. "I thought you were engaged."
"I was." And this really wasn't a topic she wanted to discuss. But if she knew Ethan — and she most certainly did — he'd hound her until she told him what he wanted to know. "His name is Ira Morris and he's a minister. He came here from Philadelphia five years ago when Reverend Quinn at First Presbyterian retired."
"A minister."
"If you laugh, I'll hit you."
He lifted a hand to his face and smoothed away his smile. "Not laughing. Honest. Tell me the rest."
"We dated for two years and he asked me to marry him."
"Lin?" When she paused, he asked, "If you dated this guy for two years and you know for sure he's not gay, how come you two never got naked together?"
"I've asked myself that a million times." She sighed. "I don't think he ever was interested in me — attracted-interested, I mean. I think he thought I'd make a perfect pastor's wife."
"He didn't know you very well, then."
She should have been insulted but the comment actually warmed her. "The wedding was set for about a year away but three months before it, I walked into his apartment unannounced one day and caught him and Mandy in the act." Funny how she didn't mind telling Ethan this. "Actually," she said, "they looked pretty silly. He's only about two inches taller than me, and skinny. Mandy Briggs is…an Amazon."
"So I can't even go beat the tar out of this guy because he's smaller than me." Ethan's voice didn't hold a trace of amusement. Startled, she glanced up at his set face.
"No, but I appreciate the thought," she said lightly, putting her other hand on his arm. Then she realized the muscles were rigid beneath her fingertips. "Ethan, it happened almost three years ago. It's old history."
"He hurt you." His low voice carried a savage undertone.
"Only for a little while," she said. "I don't think I really loved him or it would still hurt. Now I'm just thankful Mandy got stuck with him instead of me." She shook his arm lightly. "Let's not talk about him anymore. He's not important."
They walked the rest of the way in silence. At her side, Ethan's presence felt brooding and dark, unlike last night when she'd felt so…connected to him. It was a lonely feeling, and she didn't like it.
On the sidewalk in front of their houses, he slowed to a halt. She stared up at him silently, unsure of how to react to his strange mood.
"Lindy," he said.
"Ethan." She smiled, trying for lightness.
"I don't want to hurt you."
Startled, she said, "You haven't."
"I can't stay. You know that."
"It never occurred to me that you would." That was true. She had known from the moment she'd seen him getting out of his car on Monday that he was only visiting. And she wasn't going to think about it until after he was gone. Then she'd have the rest of her life to cry.
"I want you." He pulled her around to face him and drew her against him.
"I know." She put her hands up to each side of his face. "Kiss me."
"Inside." His voice was hoarse. "I'll kiss you inside." He paused, and she felt his broad chest rise and fall as he took a deep breath. "We're not stopping with kisses tonight, Lin."
Ethan scooped Lindy into his arms. He sought her mouth with his, and she willingly wrapped her arms around his shoulders and returned his deep kisses. She felt him fumble with the latch on the gate outside his house, then they were through and he was setting her down on the doorstep.
His mouth never left hers as he fished in his pocket, but when he finally came up with the house key, he tore himself away. "Sorry," he said. "Needed a free hand to find that key."
"That's all right. It's probably bad luck to carry a woman over the threshold if she's not a bride." The moment the words left her mouth, she was sorry. They made her sound pathetic.
But Ethan didn't appear to notice. He unlocked the door and ushered her in, flicking on low lights as he went.
Lindy followed behind him. His home hadn't changed much from the days his mother had lived here, except that there was a sterile feel to the place now. She knew he'd had someone in to clean regularly, but it still seemed kind of sad, as if the house were waiting for a family again.
He stopped in the kitchen and opened a cupboard, grabbing two wineglasses, then got a bottle of champagne from the refrigerator and led her back down the hall.
"Champagne?" she asked. "Is there something to celebrate?"
"You could look at it that way." He paused outside the closed door of the bedroom that once had been his. Even though she knew his mother had eventually turned it into a generic guest bedroom, she supposed he'd still feel most comfortable there.
Then Ethan opened the door and urged her forward. He flicked on a lamp just inside the door and Lindy gasped. The room was filled with flowers.
He set down the wine and walked around the small space, lighting a variety of candles, then came back to her and turned off the lamp, leaving them in the warm, flickering light of the tiny flames.
She felt tears sting behind her eyelids. Now she knew why she'd waited. Every girl should have a first sexual experience like this. "Oh, Ethan," she breathed, "thank you."
"I haven't done anything yet." He grinned at her, and she melted. Tugging on her hand, he pulled her into his arms. "You have on too many clothes."
"So do you," she whispered.
Today she'd worn a simple sundress that buttoned down the front. It was quick work for Ethan to unbutton it and push it off her shoulders, leaving her standing before him in her bra and panties. He took her glasses, as well, setting them atop the dresser.
She fought the urge to cover herself with her arms, and slowly lifted her hands to his knit shirt, opening the few buttons and pulling it free of his pants. When the backs of her hands brushed against his bare stomach, he inhaled sharply. "How about if I help a little?"
In just a moment, he stood before her in nothing but a pair of snug-fitting navy briefs. He was already aroused and the stretchy front of the fabric outlined the hard ridge of flesh beneath.
Lindy felt her breath come faster. Her whole body was warm and as he reached out and drew her to him, she fitted herself against him as closely as she could with her head cushioned on his firm, muscled chest. He reached up and took down her hair, running his fingers through it until it rippled around them. For a long, sweet moment, he simply held her, his big hands gently stroking up and down her back.
Finally, she couldn't stand it any longer. Turning her face slightly, she nuzzled his throat, actually daring to lick him there, where his pulse beat fast and strong. Ethan groaned. She felt him unhook the clasp of her bra with one hand and then he stepped back, tossing it away and kneeling to strip away her panties.
She froze. His face was inches away from her…her…and then she jumped as he blew a stream of hot breath through the nest of curls there. She put her hands down to draw him up to her, but he leaned slightly forward and she felt his tongue touch her intimately and she was so shocked she forgot what she'd been about to do. "Ethan," she gasped.
"Let me," he murmured, and his breath was a caress on her sensitive flesh. He put his hands on the insides of her thighs and pressed lightly until she complied, widening her stance a little. And then he kissed her. There. On the very spot that was throbbing and needy and —
"Oh, God." She clutched at his shoulders as his mouth grew bolder. Then her hands were in his hair, pressing him closer and closer as he used his tongue in ways she had never quite realized a tongue could be used.
She cried out, and as if it were a sign, he withdrew from her and rose to his feet, lifting her easily and carrying her across the room to the bed, where he'd already pulled back the sheets. Gently, as if she were made of glass, he laid her down. Then, still standing beside her, he put his thumbs in the elastic of his briefs and pulled them down and off.
He was huge. Dark and silky-looking, and without thinking she raised her hand and dreamily encircled him. He groaned, and his hand came around to cover hers. "Like this," he whispered, guiding her into a steady rhythm. But she'd barely begun when he pulled her wrist away.
"Sorry." His grin was crooked. "If I let you do that, you're going to stay a virgin longer than you'd like." He turned away for a moment and she watched as he rolled protection into place, then he lowered himself onto her, using his knees to spread her legs. He took her wrists and anchored them both above her head.
She felt helpless and exposed, and unbelievably aroused. She arched against him, feeling him hard and ready against her belly, but he only laughed. "Not yet, baby. Not yet." He lowered his head and took one nipple into his mouth and she nearly came off the bed at the intense sensation that shot straight from her breast to her womb.
"Ethan, please…please…" She knew exactly what she was pleading for, and when he raised his hips and she felt him fall heavily between her legs, she opened her thighs wide and wriggled until she felt the smooth head pushing at her. "Now," she panted.
"Easy, baby. We have all —"
"No. Now!" Driving her heels into the bed, she shoved firmly upward, and with shocking ease, she suddenly felt him fill her. She felt a pinching discomfort for a moment, but she repeated her motion and it was gone, swept away in the wondrous moment of becoming one with the man she loved.
"Lin — are you all right?" She understood his anxious tone and he propped himself on his elbows to study her face.
"I'm fine," she said, drinking in every second of his lovemaking. She met his blue eyes and smiled invitingly. "Will you please move?"
"Your wish is my command." He grinned, that familiar cocky grin that always made her heart turn over, and as he lowered his head and began to kiss her, he established a smooth easy rhythm with his hips, rocking the bed beneath them. She felt an unfamiliar tension rising, and she lifted herself to meet his thrusts as he increased his speed, almost sobbing as each impact shot her higher, tighter, until she felt like a drawn bow —
And then the tension burst into exquisite circles of pleasure that jolted her body spasmodically. She felt him stiffen and arch against her, pumping himself deep within her body, and for one insane instant, she was sorry he'd remembered to use birth control.
When the last spasm had shaken them and he lay heavily over her, his head on the pillow beside hers, she turned her head and kissed him. "Thank you."
"No," he said in a thick, slow voice, "thank you. I've never felt…like that before."
She was so touched, tears came to her eyes and she closed them. Ethan heaved himself up and slid to her side, gathering her into his arms, idly playing with her hair.
"What now?" she asked. Then a huge yawn overtook her.
"Nap," he said. "Then…we start all over again."
Ethan walked Lindy to work a little early on Saturday morning. She liked to get in and get organized before the rest of the library employees arrived. Especially today, since she'd taken yesterday off and spent the entire lazy day making love with Ethan until he had objected that he would make her sore, tossed her in the shower, and taken her out to dinner in a neighboring town.
She unlocked the door and got the whole way into her office before she realized he was still close on her heels.
"I'll see you this evening," she said, turning and stretching on tiptoe for a kiss.
"Umm." He caught her against him with purposeful hands when she would have stepped back, and the kiss he gave her didn't feel in the least like a goodbye kiss.
"Ethan," she said warningly. "I have to get to work."
"It's still early," he said with an innocent smile. But she read his intent in his eyes and in a flash she wheeled and dashed around her desk.
He stalked around the desk as Lindy tried to keep the furniture between them, a purposeful gleam in his eye.
"Ethan! We can't —"
"Oh, yeah." His voice was a purr as he cornered her in front of the computer desk. "We can. In fact, I seem to remember we're getting pretty damned good at it."
"But…not here!" Her voice rose in desperation as he unbuttoned her blouse with surprising dexterity in his big fingers. He slipped his palms inside the opened front of her blouse, cupping her breasts through the lacy camisole and rubbing his thumbs insistently back and forth, back and forth over her nipples. Lightning bolts of arousal shot through her and she felt herself softening, moistening, as butterflies fluttered deep in her womb.
Desperately, she caught his wrists with her hands, but he was far too strong for her to have any impact. He thrust his hips forward, and she moaned as the hard evidence of his desire settled into the notch of her thighs.
"Sh-h-h." He was laughing as he set his mouth over hers, muffling the sounds she couldn't hold back. One hand withdrew from her blouse and grabbed fistfuls of her skirt, dragging it out of the way. His hand slipped surely down over the smooth plane of her belly, beneath her tiny panties and her knees went weak as he delved into the warm cove between her legs.
She felt him probing, spreading her own moisture over her throbbing flesh and she whimpered beneath his mouth, then abruptly bucked in his arms as one long finger slid smooth and deep inside her. His thumb worried the pouting bud of her desire, pressing and massaging relentlessly as she writhed against him, impaled on that encroaching finger. Her whole being was focused on the sensations he created. She felt herself hurtling forward, faster and faster, her hips moving wildly against his hand.
And then she flew apart. Her moan rose into a ragged scream, which he swallowed while she heaved and quivered with the force of the contractions cascading through her.
While she still shook in the grip of her own ecstasy, he slipped his hand free. Dimly, she felt him fumbling with the fastening of his pants and she reached down to help him, her small fingers delving into his briefs and curling around the hard, silky flesh she found there. She lifted him free and as she did, she realized he was shaking.
"Oh, God," he whispered, fumbling with the small packet he'd taken from his pocket, and she wasn't sure if it was a curse or a prayer. "Hurry. Take me." With frantic motions he tugged aside the leg of her panties and positioned himself. Lindy spread her legs as he pushed farther between her thighs, and then they both sucked in a breath of shocking pleasure as he thrust his hips forward, pushing her up and back onto the desk as he filled her with one deep stroke.
She lay back, feeling him pull her buttocks off the desk and willingly she wrapped her legs around his waist as he came over her, supporting himself on his elbows. Immediately, he began a forceful pounding rhythm, and as he drove home within her again and again, she felt the sweet tension hurling her up and over the edge a second time. Ethan felt it, too, and with a series of deep, wrenching groans, he emptied himself within her as his body slowly stilled.
She clutched his shoulders tightly, wishing the moment didn't have to end. Wishing he wouldn't leave. Wishing he'd marry her and take her with him.
Oh, God, she hadn't even let herself think it before. Ethan and marry didn't belong in the same sentence. Except to her, they only belonged in a sentence together —
"Belinda? Are you in there? I need a signature on this requisition." The strident female voice was a jarring peal of reality.
Lindy jumped, her thoughts completely scattered, but she was unable to move, pinned by the utterly relaxed weight of Ethan's sizable body. "Ethan!" She pushed at his shoulders. "Let me up!"
He only grinned at her. "How much will you pay me?"
"You are an oversexed idiot." She did her best to glare at him. Almost frantic to get to the door before it opened and someone caught them, she wriggled and squirmed. "I'll be there in a minute," she called, hoping her voice didn't sound as husky and different to her staff as it did to her own ears.
Ethan pushed himself backward, slowly disengaging their bodies. Reaching behind her head, he tugged free a handful of tissues and tenderly began to wipe away the slippery moisture between her thighs. She made a sound of shocked protest and tried to get away, but he held her in place with his body until he had gently pulled her panties into place again.
Lindy felt her face flame as he stepped back and lifted her to her feet.
He cleaned up and restored his own clothing to order, then looked up at her, and his face creased in the familiar grin she couldn't resist. "It's a little late to be blushing," he told her.
"I can't help it," she whispered in a fierce undertone. "I'm not — I don't do things like this."
Ethan only smiled. "You do now." But there was something watchful in the depths of his piercing blue eyes.
A surprising little imp of irritation reared its head. "Easy for you to say. You're not the one who will have to stay and face the gossip after you leave."
His smile slowly died, and his eyes grew darker and hard to read. "You don't have to stay, either, you know."
They both were silent, letting the words hang uncomfortably in the air.
"I need to get out front," she told him, wishing they had time to finish this conversation. Suddenly he seemed as distant as the moon. What did he mean by that remark? "Stay here until I tell you it's okay to sneak out," she finally said as she reached for the doorknob.
* * *
You don't have to stay, either. Ethan cursed his impulsive tongue as he fastened his cufflinks and reached for the black silk tie that matched his shirt and suit that evening. He'd practically forgotten about the damned reunion until she'd reminded him this morning.
The memory of the way she'd hustled him out the back door of the library still rankled. It annoyed him that she didn't want people talking about them. Did she really only want him for a little clandestine sex?
Well, hell. He supposed the bottom line was yes.
She'd told him that first evening what she wanted from him. And he'd given it to her. But what he hadn't counted on was giving her his heart.
His fingers stilled on the half-knotted silk. All right, so you love her. It doesn't change anything. He hadn't given her his heart this week. No, he'd loved her for a very long time — the shy, quiet beauty next door who'd seen past the bad boy persona and liked him for himself.
He'd been convinced she would never welcome a declaration of his feelings, and he hadn't been secure enough back in high school to risk rejection. So he'd left. Since then, there had been a lot of women, but not a single one them had ever gotten beneath his skin. Lindy had always been in the back of his mind.
The question was, what was he going to do about her now? He knew what he wanted to do. He wanted to marry her.
He took a deep breath. "I want to marry her," he said aloud.
But…would she even consider the idea? In the past few days, he'd begun to think she must have some feelings for him. Could she have responded so totally to his lovemaking if she didn't? Did she love him? Could she love him?
And if she did, how would she react if he asked her to marry him and leave Bell Gap with him forever. She seemed so very tied to the little town, to their memories. But she needed a fresh start. He wanted to take her around the world, share new places with her, shower her with pretty things.
He knew she didn't consider herself very attractive and it drove him crazy. She'd been quiet and studious in high school, sure, but her jerk-off fiancé's treatment must have undermined her confidence more deeply than she wanted anyone to know.
If he told her he loved her, asked her to marry him, she'd think he was lying. Teasing her.
Maybe he'd better start small and work up to it. Ask her to visit him, or to take a trip with him first. Let her see the woman she could be. Then maybe she'd believe he'd been waiting for her for almost half of their 28 years.
Lindy was ready, as he knew she'd be, when Ethan went over to pick her up for the reunion. He saw her shadow fall across the living room window as she came toward the door in answer to his knock.
But when the door opened, a stranger stood before him.
He stared. He tried not to keep his mouth from falling open.
"Ethan?" The vision reached out a hand and touched his arm. "Are you all right?"
"Yeah, yeah, I'm, uh, fine." He stepped into the house and turned immediately to survey her. "What'd you do to yourself?"
Her face fell. "I felt like a change, so I had a makeover and bought a new dress. If you don't think it looks right, I'll —"
"Wait!" He grabbed her elbow as she turned away. "I'm sorry. It looks right. Believe me, baby, it looks very right. You just surprised me, that's all. I thought someone had kidnapped my Lindy and left a sex kitten in her place."
He held her still as he looked at her again. She wore a dress — and what a dress it was — of some kind of slinky black fabric that clung to her wand-slender body. Her shoulders were bared and her bosom above the strapless top looked as though she might have bought one of those push-up bras. Whatever. Who cared? He liked it.
Her legs looked a mile long in heels that brought the top of her head nearly to his eye level, and her face looked like a finely painted doll's. Except for the eyes. Shadowed and mysterious, they — hey! She wasn't wearing her glasses. "Contacts?" he asked.
She nodded. "I can't wear them all day, but they'll be fine for tonight." The motion of her head made her hair slither and bounce over her shoulders, and he lifted one finger and touched a curl. She'd curled it somehow, and her waist-length hair waved and shimmered with a life of its own.
"My God," he said reverently. "You are beautiful. I feel like I should be giving you jewels or something." If she married him, he'd give her jewels like she couldn't even imagine.
She laughed, and turned to the table to get a tiny black purse. "I'll let you off the hook this one time."
He took her out and handed her into his little sports car. He hardly ever drove in New York, and it had been pure pleasure to come down here in his very own car.They didn't talk much on the way to the fraternal club where the reunion was being held. As he helped her out of the car, she smiled up at him and he couldn't resist leaning forward and touching his lips to hers. "I can hardly wait to get you out of that dress later."
"I can hardly wait for you to get me out of this dress later," she said.
"Lindy, I…I have to leave tomorrow." Suddenly it was important that he get something nailed down between them. "I want you to come with me."
Her eyes changed, became carefully blank, and her heart-shaped face didn't change expression by one single muscle. "To New York?"
"Yeah, to start with," he said, talking fast to cover the nerves. "And then after I get a few arrangements made, get you settled in my place, I thought maybe we could sneak over to Paris for a week. What do you think?"
She hesitated.
He held his breath.
Then…she shook her head. And his heart dropped to the ground and shattered.
"Ethan," she said, "I'm just not that kind of girl. I'd be miserable in New York. Paris would be fun, but…I couldn't possibly take off from the library for that long. And people would talk —"
"Oh, I forgot," he said, furious with her and with himself, as well. "I'm good enough to —" he used a crude basic word that made her flinch "— but not to be seen with. What the hell are you doing here with me tonight?"
There was a moment of sheer, utter silence.
Finally, Lindy spoke. Her voice was soft and pleading and there were tears in her eyes. "Ethan, don't." She took his face in her hands. "Let's not spoil this evening. For either one of us. Let us just have one more night of magic. We can talk later. As much as you want."
He stood rigid beneath her touch for one long moment. Then resignation set in. He'd given it a shot. He'd been turned down. He might as well take what crumbs she'd throw him tonight and leave without making either one of them any more uncomfortable than they already were. Slowly, he turned his head into her palm and kissed her there. "All right."
"Thank you," she whispered. She closed her eyes and he realized she'd expected him to storm off. Instead, he took her hand and led her into the reunion.
Inside the big hall, they got exactly the reaction she'd expected. People approached with outstretched hands. They did a double take when they realized she was Belinda the Librarian. They did another one when they recognized her escort. She pinned on a smile and bit the inside of her lip, holding the pain away, determined not to ruin this one last evening with Ethan.
One small highlight of the evening occurred when she spotted Mandy Briggs Morris and her minister, both openly staring at them. She waggled her fingers at them, unable to resist, then giggled into Ethan's shoulder when they both turned away as if they'd been caught cheating again.
Ethan turned his head and saw the retreat, recognized Mandy, and started across the room. Lindy had to grab his arm and dig in her heels to hold him back. "Trust me," she said, "if you just grab my butt on the dance floor once, my payback will be complete. He'll spend the rest of his rotten marriage wondering what I'm like in bed."
"Too hot for a rat like that." He stopped and put an arm around her, leaned down to kiss her ear. "And he'll never find out because I will kill him if he even tries to talk to you."
She didn't point out that killing the Reverend would require Ethan to stay in Bell Gap. He knew that wasn't happening and so did she. Her heart squeezed painfully.
If only he'd said he loved her. She wouldn't even hold out for marriage. But she'd spoken the truth: she would be miserable in New York with him, knowing that all she was a temporary fling. Paris, the city of lovers, was unthinkable. Without love, continuing a relationship with him was out of the question, no matter what her heart said.
They ate dinner with several of Ethan's old football buddies and their wives, many of whom were from out of town now, too, so the conversation wasn't as awkward as she'd feared. When it came time for the class officers to give out those stupid awards, her name was called, for "Most Changed."
They danced. She fit in his arms, followed his lead as if they'd been together for years. She rested her head on his shoulder; he kissed her temple. And her heart broke completely in half.
Oh, Ethan. Why couldn't you have loved me?
Ethan was gone when Lindy woke in the morning.
She'd slept in his arms through the night, waking once to find him already inside her, her leg draped over his thigh, a furnace of heat against her back as he slowly thrust, holding her to him with a hand low on her belly.
He'd woken her a second time near dawn, rolling to his back and pulling her astride him, palming her breasts and urging her to ride him in a rough, hoarse voice that set fire to her excitement and sent them both hurtling into a powerful climax. Afterward, he'd stroked her hair as she lay on his chest.
Then…she must have dozed off again. And while she slept, he'd slipped away.
Lindy rolled over and looked at the clock. Ten a.m. on Sunday. Was there really any reason to get out of bed today? She rolled over again and buried her face in the pillow as the sobs came.
Monday. Lindy slammed her hand down on the alarm and dragged herself out of bed. She had to get ready for work. Work. It was all she had left.
As she dressed and ate, then walked to work, the future unwound itself before her like a black-and-white movie, a series of interminable scenes unfolding behind her desk at the library.
And something within her snapped.
She couldn't do it. She just couldn't resign herself to being Belinda the Librarian for the rest of her days. Not after she'd been Lindy the Sex Kitten, not after she'd realized how much she needed Ethan Wilde in her life and her heart.
Half of that was true right now. But he was gone from her life, unless she took her future in both hands and made it happen.
He'd wanted her to come with him. But she'd never imagined herself leaving Bell Gap, never imagined living somewhere else. It wasn't even that she feared a change so much as it was that she simply had never believed that she could make a change. But now, with Ethan gone, she saw how empty the little town was. Bell Gap was now Somewhere Else. Because it wasn't where Ethan was.
So he didn't love her? So what? Her choices were to stay here and let him leave her forever, or to go with him and enjoy the time they had together. So what if people talked when she came back home one day? So what if she no longer had a position at the library? She'd have memories. And she'd have the satisfaction of looking at herself in the mirror and knowing she'd tried.
If she didn't take this one chance, she'd regret it for the rest of her life. If she went to him, with him, at least she'd have that time. And in that time, she'd let him know she loved him. Miracles happened. Maybe his heart would admit her someday.
Turning on her heel, she walked away from the library and headed for the travel office on the square.
Later the same day, the chairman of the board stomped into the library. Lindy met him in front of the checkout desk. He didn't look happy. "I'm afraid I won't be able to give you a recommendation, Belinda, if you don't give us at least two weeks' notice. It won't be easy to replace you."
"That's all right. I understand. But I'm leaving today, anyway."
"This is terribly irresponsible —" The thin, balding board president began to sputter, but Lindy was no longer listening. Her attention was on the door, where a tall, broad-shouldered man with shining hair and intense blue eyes had just come in.
Without giving herself time to think, Lindy launched herself at Ethan. He caught her as he had one week before. She threw her arms around his shoulders and pressed her mouth to his as a swell of whispers and murmurs filled the library behind them. His kiss felt like heaven. It felt like…she was coming home.
"Ethan! What —" She had to stop and clear her throat, which was threatening to close up. "What are you doing here?"
"I came to see you," he said.
"But I was coming to you. In New York." She dug her ticket out of her pocket and waved it beneath his nose. "Ethan —"
"Lindy —" he said at the same time.
"You first," he said.
"Me first," she said.
They looked at each other, then shared a moment of awkward laughter. Then the laughter died away.
"The thing is," she said, "that I want to be with you. I'm quitting the library. I'll follow you to New York or Paris or wherever you want to go, and I'll stay with you as long as you'll let me. I love you, Ethan. I'd rather be with you every day that I can and maybe be lonely someday down the road than stay here in Bell Gap without you. I want memories. And there's no reason not to make them just because you don't care as much." She paused, eyeing his reaction, but he hadn't moved. "There. I guess I'm done."
"All right," he said. "My turn." There was an odd gleam in his eyes that she didn't trust. Sort of like when they'd been in sixth grade and he'd offered to push her on the swing, then walked around in front and enjoyed the view while she'd tried desperately to keep her skirt from billowing up around her neck.
"When I was a kid," he began, "there was the cutest little girl living next door. And we were friends. In high school, she got even cuter. But she was really, really smart, and she didn't seem impressed by any of my escapades. She intimidated the hell out of me, if you want the truth. And when I left town, she was getting ready to go to college and my leaving didn't seem to matter to her one little bit."
He stopped then, and reached up to blot a tear that rolled down her cheek. "Even though I didn't see her for years, except for one time at my mother's funeral when she was a godsend, I never forgot her. She was in my heart for good. Pissed off a lot of other women, let me tell you."
Lindy made a choked sound, half laugh and half sob.
"So when I got this invitation to a reunion, I decided to come back and see if she was still around. And she was." He dropped his forehead against hers and looked into her eyes. "And I loved her more than ever and I hoped she loved me. But I was afraid to tell her how I felt, or to ask her to marry me, so I thought I'd start small, invite her to come share my world for a while."
He closed his eyes briefly. "And when she said no, she broke my heart."
He released Lindy and stepped back. "And I acted stupid and left, and almost lost her. But then I realized I had to come back and tell her everything."
He pulled a small white box wrapped with silver ribbon from his pocket and dropped to one knee.
Behind them, there was an audible gasp. Other than that single sound, the library was dead quiet.
"I love you, Lindy Melton," Ethan said. "Will you honor me with your hand in marriage?"
"I would be honored to be your wife," she said. She sat daintily on his knee as he snapped the ring box open, and he slid the exquisite square-cut diamond onto her finger.
And behind them, a woman's voice said, "How come you never did that for me, Melvin?"
Two hours later, they were back where they'd started, in Ethan's bed.
"I think I'd like to keep a place here in Bell Gap," he said. "So that our children will have a sense of where we grew up."
Lindy choked on her champagne. "Children? Did I miss a conversation somewhere?"
Ethan decided he might as well just say it. Look where thinking things through had gotten him the last time. "I know we haven't talked about it, but I would really, really like you to have my babies. Even one would do."
To his relief, she sent him a brilliant smile. "How about we agree to put a cap on it at four, with either party allowed to halt the procreation at any time after the first one makes us or breaks us?"
"Four. That's a good number." He kissed her. "I'm glad you want children."
Her eyes narrowed. "Why?"
"Because," he said, "Sunday morning, we didn't use anything. Either time."
"You sneak," she said.
"I had to have a backup plan," he defended himself. "I figured if I got you pregnant, you'd have to marry me. And sooner or later, you'd see what a prize I am and fall in love with me."
"I already loved you," she reminded him. "You were just too dumb to know it."
"And you were too dumb to show it," he countered.
She opened her mouth but before she could speak again, he rolled her with him across the bed, ending with her beneath him. He settled himself snugly in the place that fit him so perfectly, and she wrapped her legs around his hips to hold him fast.
Threading his fingers through hers, he dropped his head and sought her lips. "I love you, Lindy. And I promise to show it every day for the rest of our lives."
And to prove he was serious, he began immediately.
The End