SOUL MATES
by
Virginia Gray


Chapter One

' Bob and Susan are going to adopt a baby."  "Mmm."

A beat later, Jack Riley looked up from the papers he was studying and
stared across his desk at Caroline Smithson.  She sat curled in the
corner of the leather sofa on the other side of his study, going
through the day's mail.  "What did you say?"  "Bob and Susan are
adopting a baby."  "You've got to be kidding."

"Nope.  We got an announcement.  They say their son, Kevin, has added
so much to their lives that they want to experience the joy of
parenting to its fullest, and since Susan is unable to have more
children they've decided to open their home and their hearts to a needy
orphan.

"They're adopting a Eurasian baby girl named ... mmm, let's see."
Caroline scanned the joyously worded message again.  "Ah, here it is.
Kim Lee.  She's two months old, half American and half Korean.  She'll
be arriving at Houston Intercontinental

Airport next Thursday evening at seven.  According to this, Bob and
Susan would like for all their friends and family to be there to help
them welcome their new daughter into their family."

"I don't believe it.  I had lunch with Bob just yesterday.  He never
mentioned a word about it."

"I guess they wanted to surprise everyone."  Caroline stared at the
pale pink card, aware of a strange sensation in her chest--an achy knot
that sat just beneath her breastbone and made breathing difficult. 
Why, she wondered, was she so affected by the announcement?  Why did
she suddenly feel all teary and emotional?  It wasn't like her.

"All I can say is they must be gluttons for punish-meat."  Jack shook
his head, dislodging the unruly black lock of hair that habitually
tumbled over his forehead.  He absently raked it back and returned his
attention to the blueprints on his desk.

"Oh, I don't know."  Caroline felt compelled to add.  "You have to
admit, Kevin is a darling little boy.  And you always seem to enjoy
being around him."

"Yeah, he's an okay kid.  Now.  But just give him a few years.  One of
these days he'll be a teenager and a royal pain in the butt.  Then see
if you think he's so sweet.  The main reason I can have fun with the
kid now is because he's theirs and not ours.  When we go home, he stays
with Bob and Susan."

The statement sounded flippant, even cold, but Caroline knew the pain
that was behind it, and she gazed sadly at Jack's bent head.  It wasn't
that he didn't like children.  He simply did not want to risk
subjecting them to the kind of childhood both of them had endured.

She agreed with him totally.  Even so, she could not let the matter
drop.

"That's true.  Still... they certainly don't seem to mind."  What on
earth was wrong with her?  It wasn't as though she were pining away for
a family of her own, God forbid.

"Yeah, well, that's because they're still living the fantasy."

"I suppose you're right."

Determined to shake off her maudlin mood, Caroline had replied briskly,
but something in her voice must have captured Jack's attention.  He
looked up again and frowned.

"Of course I'm right."

Rising, he came around the desk and sat down beside her on the sofa. He
put his arms around her, tipped her face up and smiled tenderly into
her eyes.  "I'm just glad that you and I never bought into the myth of
marriage and children and all the baggage that goes with it.  Look at
us.  We've been together for six years.  We're proof that you don't
need a piece of paper to be committed to each other.  Right?"

"Right," Caroline agreed, but she knew her smile was wan.  What was
wrong with her?  Of course she agreed with him.  Completely.  Their
shared view on the folly of marriage was one of the things that had
drawn them together in the first place.

They had both learned that lesson from their parents' frequent
matrimonial mistakes.  To date, between them, her parents and Jack's
had already gone through a total of eighteen marriages.  Each time the
parent involved had fervently declared that this was "the one," a match
made in heaven that would last forever.

"You don't sound very convinced."

"Oh, don't mind me."  She sighed and flashed him a wry look.  "I guess
I'm just feeling out of sorts and ornery."  '

"Really?  I'm sorry.  What's wrong, sweetheart?"  Instead of helping,
Jack's concern merely de pressed her more.  She'd been feeling restless
for months--out of sync and vaguely discontent, and the devil of it
was, she didn't know why.  And it hurt that he obviously hadn't even
noticed she was not herself.

How could he love her as he claimed and not be aware that something was
bothering her?

Others had noticed.  Her partner certainly had.  But then, she and
Louise Ritter had been best friends since high school, long before they
opened Ambience and Caroline had met Jack.  She and Louise knew each
other inside out.

Even so... she and Jack had been lovers for almost seven years.  They
had been living together for six.  By now he ought to be sensitive to
the slightest change in her moods.

Caroline experienced a spurt of anger, but before she could reply he
stroked her cheek and murmured, "Poor darling.  I think you've been
working too hard.

I tell you what.  As soon as I wrap up the Munich project, let's take a
week or two off and get away together, just the two of us.  How about
it?"

His blue eyes caressed her and tenderness softened his roughly handsome
features.  Caroline gazed at that beloved face and felt the knot in her
chest begin to ease.  What a foolish woman she was.  How could she feel
even a moment's discontent when she had Jack?

Had she been able to make a list of the traits and qualities she wanted
in a mate and custom order him, no one would have filled the bill as
well.  He was rugged and strong and so devastatingly masculine at times
simply watching him move made her tingle all over.  In business he was
tough and knowledgeable, relentless when he had to be, but as a lover
he was caring and passionate, and a wonderful companion.  He had a
sharp mind, a wry wit and an ability to laugh at himself, which was
endearing.

He was, quite simply, everything to her.  From the moment they met they
had been perfectly attuned.  They shared a spiritual affinity and a
physical passion that bound them together like two halves of a whole.
It was as though, in each other, they had found all the missing pieces
of their lives--love, understanding, companionship.  She could not
imagine her life without him.

Her annoyance dissipated like smoke in the wind.  Smiling softly, she
reached up and threaded her fingers through his hair and pushed back
the unruly ebony lock of hair that was forever defying control.  She
savored the feel of those silky strands against her skin, the warmth of
his scalp.  Even after all this time, touching him still brought a rush
of pleasure so intense it made her warm all over.

"Oh, Jack," she murmured, loving him with her eyes.  "You always know
how to make me feel better.  I can't think of anything I'd like more
than to go away with you."

"Good.  Why don't we sail the Free Spirit down to Mexico?"  He brushed
a soft kiss over her mouth, then her cheek.  "We'll lay on the beach
and drink Margaritas."  He nuzzled her neck, and she closed her eyes
and sighed, tipping her head to one side to give him better access.
"Make love beneath the moon," he continued in that same, sexy murmur.
The tip of his tongue traced a line from her shoulder to her ear, and a
delicious shudder rippled through Caroline.  "And in the ocean."  His
breath filled her ear, hot and moist and arousing.  He nipped her lobe,
then drew it into his mouth and soothed the tiny pain with a gentle
sucking.  Caroline moaned and clutched his hair with both hands.

Jack gave a throaty chuckle.  "You like that, sweetheart?"

"Yes.  Yes!"  She pressed closer, desperately seeking his lips.  "Kiss
me, darling," she gasped.  "Please ki--"

His mouth closed over hers, cutting off the fervid plea.  The kiss was
hot and deep and unashamedly carnal.  The leather sofa crackled as they
sprawled across the cushions.  Small sounds issued from the pair--gasps
and moans of pleasure and need, of want and frustration.  Hands roamed
and clutched, limbs cut wined their bodies strained closer.

Caught in the grip of feverish passion, at first Caroline did not
notice the intrusive ringing.  Jack raised his head and looked around,
momentarily disoriented.  She gave an anguished cry and tried to pull
his head back down.

"No.  No, let go, sweetheart.  The phone--" "Don't answer it."

"I have to.  It might be important."  He dropped a quick kiss on her
lips.  "I'll be right back."  He pried her hands loose from his neck
and bounded off the sofa, leaving her lying disheveled and bereft.

"Yeah, Riley here," he growled into the receiver.  "Oh, hi, Melissa.
What's up?"

The name hit Caroline like a dash of ice water.  She closed her eyes,
and struggled to catch her breath as she ground her teeth and mentally
cursed the woman.  As usual, Melissa's timing was impeccable.  If
Caroline hadn't known better she could almost believe Jack's assistant
had bugged their apartment.

After a moment she sat up and straightened her clothes, and watched
Jack.  He sat perched on the corner of the desk, jotting down notes,
the telephone

clamped between his shoulder and jaw.  His shirt was pulled out of his
trousers and unbuttoned, the wrinkled tails hanging open around his
hips, revealing a wide chest dusted with dark, silky curls and a
rock-hard belly.  His black hair stuck out in all directions where she
had run her hands through it, but he didn't seem to notice.  The woman
on the other end of the telephone line held his undivided attention.

Melissa Atkins had been a thorn in Caroline's side ever since Jack had
hired her.  Blond, beautiful and brainy, she exuded a ruthless
self-confidence and sex appeal.  At twenty-five, she was eight years
younger than Caroline.

Jack thought she was wonderful.  Efficient, hardworking, smart, she had
proved invaluable as an assistant and he sang her praises constantly.
Caroline didn't trust her.  Not an inch.

Melissa was ambitious and manipulative, the type that would stop at
nothing to get what she wanted.  Caroline didn't believe that Jack had
any romantic interest in Melissa--not yet, at any rate--but Melissa
definitely had her sights set on Jack.

As with most men when it came to conniving women, he was oblivious to
the subtle jabs and sneers that Melissa sent her way.  On the few
occasions when she and Melissa had been alone, his assistant had not
bothered to disguise her contempt for Caroline, nor her intention, but
in his presence her manner was scrupulously cordial and businesslike.
Only another woman would recognize the double meaning behind her polite
words.

Caroline received the message loud and clear: Melissa Atkins wanted
Jack Riley, and she intended to have him.  She'd also made it clear
that she did not consider Caroline a threat.

It did no good, however, to talk to Jack about the problem.  God knows,
she'd tried.  At first he laughed off the idea.  Caroline was imagining
things.  Melissa was his assistant, and a damn good one, nothing more,
he'd insisted.  When she had persisted, however, he'd gotten angry.

Just the week before when she'd complained about the woman's attitude
they'd had a lulu of a fight--the worst they'd had in all their time
together.  Realizing she was playing into Melissa's hands, Caroline had
vowed never to make that mistake again.  Normally Jack was an excellent
judge of character, but where Melissa was concerned he seemed to have a
blind spot.

Caroline drummed her fingers on the arm of the leather sofa and cleared
her throat.  Jack didn't notice.  Now and then he muttered a comment,
but Melissa was doing most of the talking.  Caroline waited for him to
end the conversation, but when he gave no sign of doing so after twenty
minutes, she stood and quietly left the room.

Propping her elbow on her desk, her chin in her palm, Caroline sighed.
Though faint, the melancholy sound was full of despondency.

Louise Ritter looked up from the bundle of fabric swatches she was
examining and frowned.  "Don't tell me you're still depressed?"

"What?"  Caroline blinked and gazed at her friend and partner across
the elegant room that served as both the design center and office of
Ambience, the interior deCOrating firm they had built together.  "Oh.
No.  No, I'm fine."

"Don't give me that.  This is me you're talking to, remember?  You've
been in a funk for weeks.  I've been waiting for you to tell me what's
bothering you, but I'm fresh out of patience, so just spit it out."

Despite her melancholy, the statement caused a faint smile to twitch at
Caroline's mouth.  As usual, Louise was as blunt as a sledgehammer.
Patience and tact had never been virtues to which her friend could lay
claim.  That she had held her tongue this long was something of a
miracle in itself.

Louise was wrong about one thing, though.  This mood hadn't begun a few
weeks ago; it had been creeping over Caroline for months now, robbing
her of her concentration and sapping her energy.

She sighed again.  "To tell you the truth, I don't really know what's
wrong with me.  I've just been feeling... I don't know... restless, I
guess.  Sort of, well, discontent."  She spread her palms wide in a
helpless gesture.  "I don't even know why I'm so down, but I can't seem
to shake the feeling."

"Mmm."  Louise looked at her steadily, her mouth pursed.

"It's silly and stupid, I know.  I have everything anyone could ask
for--a loving relationship with a wonderful man, a successful business,
good friends, financial security, good health.  There is absolutely no
reason for me to feel blue."

"There must be something bothering you, or you wouldn't be so down."

"Well... lately Jack and I--" Abruptly she waved her hand and shook her
head.  "Oh, never mind.  It sounds so trite when you say it out
loud."

"What?  What?  C'mon, Cato, you can't just start something and then
stop like that.  Spit it out."

"It's just that... the magic seems to have gone out of our
relationship.  There, I told you it would sound stupid.  Satisfied?"

"Hey, it's not stupid.  That sort of thing can be a real problem."
Louise fiddled with the paperweight on her desk, then sent Caroline a
cautious sidelong look.  "Uh, are you saying there's trouble... you
know... in the bedroom?"

"No!  Not that.  Not at all."  Hardly, Caroline thought.  Jack's desire
for her had not waned in the least.  Their sex life was as lusty and
satisfying as ever.  That was the one thing that was right about their
relationship.  "It's just that lately it seems that he's been taking me
for granted.  He is completely wrapped up in the Munich project."

"Humph.  Is that all?  Heck, that's not so surprising.  Or unusual.
After all, Jack is in charge of building that factory.  He's always put
in long hours when working on a big project for his company.  It's
never bothered you before."

"I know.  But this time it's different.  It's like he barely knows I
exist.  Even when he's home, he's working If I didn't keep him company
in his study, I'd never see him.  He used to be so attentive, so
at-tuned to my every mood, but for the past few months he's been so
preoccupied he hasn't even noticed that something is bothering me.

"And then there's Miss Hot-to-Trot Arkins," Caroline added sourly.  "He
spends more time with her than with me these days.  The woman never
misses an opportunity to be with him.  And I swear, I think she makes
up excuses to call him at home."

"Boy, you do have a bad case of the 'poor me's," don't you?"  Louise
rose from her desk and walked over to stand in front of Caroline's with
her hands on her hips.  "As far as Miss Hot Pants is concerned, you
have only yourself to blame if she steals Jack right out from under
your nose.  After all, he is a single man."  Caroline shot her a stern
look.  "Don't start,

Her friend shrugged.  "I'm just stating facts.  You and Jack aren't
married or even engaged.  As far as Ms.  Atkins is concerned, that
makes him fair game."

"Maybe so, but Jack loves me.  We're committed to each other."

"Caro, you know that I like Jack, but he's a virile, good-looking
devil, and it's not all that Unusual for a man to get itchy when a
couple has been together for as long as you two have.  Especially when
a young, beautiful woman makes a play for him.  He loves you, but
still, when temptation presents itself, in the back of his mind,
sitting there like a little escape clause, is the knowledge that you're
not married."

"Well, thanks a lot.  That really makes me feel better."

"I'm just trying to make you wake up and face reality."

"You're wasting your time.  Jack and I are just fine the way we are."

"Look, just because--"

The front door opened, and both women looked up as their former
receptionist, Stephanie Baker, walked in.

"Steph.  What a nice surprise," both women said in unison.

"Oh, look, Cato.  She brought the baby."

"Hi.  Actually, Amy and I just came from getting our six-week checkup,
and since we were in the neighborhood, I thought I'd drop by and show
you how much she's grown."

Laden with a voluminous diaper bag, a huge purse and a baby carrier,
Stephanie looked as though she was about to topple over.  "Here, let us
help you."

Louise, the original Earth Mother, made a beeline for the baby and
scooped her up out of the carrier.  Caroline lifted the huge bag off
Stephanie's shoulder and nearly staggered.  "Good grief!  What's in
this thing?  It weighs a ton."

Stephanie laughed.  "Just the bare essentials.  You would be amazed how
much paraphernalia is required to care for a baby."

"Oh, aren't you just the most precious thing," Louise cooed.  "Caro,
look.  She's adorable."

Caroline doubted that.  She and Louise had visited Stephanie at the
hospital following the birth.  The baby had ben red, wrinkled and as
scrawny as a plucked chicken.  Caroline had dutifully complimented the
young mother and said all the right things, but privately she had
wondered how anyone could go gaga over such an unappealing scrap of
humanity.

Stepping closer, she peered at the pink-and-white bundle in Louise's
arms, and received a shock.  The baby had filled out into a beautiful
little cherub with chubby cheeks, a rosebud mouth and the biggest, most
beautiful dark blue eyes Carol'me had ever seen.

"Oh, my," she whispered.  "Why, she's ... she's perfect."  The baby
fixed her with an unblinking stare, and Caroline felt an odd warmth
steal into her heart.  Oolden fuzz covered the baby's head and her
fingers were the size of matchsticks.  Unable to resist, Caroline
reached out and stroked her cheek then those tiny fingers.  Her skin
was warm and as velvety soft as rose petals.

With amazing speed, the infant's tiny hand wrapped around Caroline's
finger.  "My goodness.  Her grip is so strong;"

"I know."  Stephanie smiled at her daughter with motherly pride.  "When
she grabs hold of something you have to pry her loose."

"Here, why don't you hold her, Cato," Louise suggested.

"What?  Oh, no.  No, I wouldn't know how.  I might hurt her."

"Nonsense.  You'll do fine.  Here."  Louise stuffed the infant into
Caroline's arms before she could back away.  The baby fixed her with
that unblinking stare that seemed to look right into Caroline's soul.

"Why don't you hold her up against your shoulder?  She might need to
burp," Louise advised, and Caroline shot her a terrorized look.  "Oh,
go on.  She won't break."

Cautiously she lifted the baby to her shoulder, one hand cupped around
the tiny bottom, the other splayed over her back and the base of her
head.  Flaying her little fists, Amy made a gurgling sound and burrowed
close.

Caroline caught her breath.  A sweet pressure swelled her chest and
made her feel warm all over.  She wanted to cry and laugh at the same
time.

She hadn't realized how tiny a baby was, how helpless, how incredibly
soft and warm.

Obeying an urge she didn't understand, Caroline Stroked the downy head
with her fingertips and snuggled her face against the baby's neck.  She
sighed and closed her eyes as the wonderful smell of baby iCdled her
senses.  Her heart ached and her throat grew so tight she couldn't
speak.

"You know, Stephanie, if you change your mind and want to come back to
work, your job is waiting," Louise said.  "We haven't found anyone to
fill the position yet."

"Thanks, Mrs.  Ritter, but I don't think so.  I've got the most
important job in the world already, taking care of Amy.  It's a little
tough, making ends meet on just one salary, but Dave and I agreed that
it's best for Amy to be cared for by her mother.  Speaking of which,
I'd better run.  By the time I get home it will be time to nurse
her."

Caroline reluctantly surrendered the infant to her mother.  She was
surprised at how empty and cold her arms felt Without that squirming
little bundle.

When they left Caroline returned to her desk, but instead of working
she stared out the window at nothing in particular.  Why, she wondered,
did she feel so odd?

Several seconds passed before she realized that Louise was standing in
front of her desk, watching her with a cat-that-ate-the-canary look on
her face.

Caroline raised one eyebrow.  "What?"  "Tve changed my mind."  "Oh?
About what?"

"It's not Jack's neglect or Miss Hot Pants' poaching that's giving you
the blue devils.  The problem is, your biological clock is ticking."

"What?  That's the most preposterous thing I've ever heard."  '

"You wouldn't say that if you could have seen your face when you were
holding Amy.  You want a baby, and you want it bad.  If you had a lick
of sense you'd marry Jack and start a family, before it's too late."

Panic fluttered through Caroline.  As a result her voice was sharper
than she intended.  "Don't be ridiculous I'm not in the least maternal.
Even if I were, marriage is out of the question.  You know how Jack and
I feel about that.  Of all people, we know that so-called 'wedded
bliss' is a crock.  Jack's mother is currently married to her fifth
husband and his father has been married and divorced four times.  As we
speak, my own mother is honeymooning in the Caribbean with husband
number six.  Who, I might add, is eleven years her junior."

"What about your dad?  Charley certainly seems happy, and he and Alma
have been married for twenty-three years."

"Ah, yes, Dad.  The third time does seem to have been the charm for
him, doesn't it?"  Caroline drawled, shooting her partner a dry look.

Caroline had always been much closer to her father than her mother, but
her love for him did not blind her to his faults.

"You're so cynical.  There are plenty of successful marriages around.
Take Roger and me, for instance.  Hitched ten years, two kids and I
love the big lug more every day."

"Yes, well, you and Rog are the exceptions."  Louise huffed and rolled
her eyes.  "I don't care what you say.  I know you, Caroline Smithson.
Regardless of your background, and this stupid agreement that you and
Jack have, you want what most women want... a family of your own--a
husband, a baby or two, a house in the suburbs with a swing set in the
backyard, maybe even a dog, the whole she-bang.  The trouble is, you're
too scared to admit it, so you're trying to pretend that something else
is getting you down."

"Oh pul-leeze.  Me?  That's absurd."

"Uh-huh.  So you say.  But how are you going to ignore that sound?"

"What sound?"

Smirking, Louise leaned across Caroline's desk and said softly, "Tick.
Tick.  Tick."

Chapter Two

Over the next several weeks Caroline told herself that Louise was
wrong.  The very idea was ridiculous and totally off the mark, merely
another of her friend's misguided attempts to steer her toward the
altar.  Louise was happily married, therefore she thought everyone
else, especially her closest friend, should be as well.

What she ought to do, Caroline told herself, what she fully intended to
do, was forget the whole thing.

That, however, proved impossible.  She found herself thinking about
Louise's theory constantly.  She would be browsing through a bundle of
upholstery swatches, or studying a customer's floor plan, or haggling
with a supplier, and the next thing she knew her mind had wandered off
to babies and wedding rings.

It didn't help that every time she got anywhere near Louise, her friend
would get that sly smile on her face and whisper under her breath,
"Tick.  Tick.  Tick."

Dammit!  She was happy with the arrangement she and Jack had, Caroline
staunchly repeated over and over.  They were the envy of everyone who
knew them, for heavens sake!  They had it all--a loving relationship,
success in fascinating careers that they

loved, good health, a fabulous apartment, even a luxurious forty-foot
cabin cruiser.  Unemcumbered by children, they had the time, money and
freedom to enjoy an idyllic life-style.  Only a fool wouldn't be happy
in her shoes.

It didn't help.  Finally, deciding it was time for a sharp reminder of
why she had always avoided marriage, Caroline took her father out to
lunch.

Punctual, as always, Charley Smithson arrived at the restaurant before
she did.  "Hi, Dad.  Sorry I'm late."

He rose at her approach, and Caroline's heart swelled with pride and
love.  Still slender at sixty, with his silver hair and blue eyes and
rugged masculine features he was Paul Newmanish handsome.  He was also
one of the sweetest men she'd ever encountered.  She had never been
able to understand why her mother had left him for someone else.  Lilah
seemed to be one of those pathetic women who measured her own worth by
how many men she could attract and to deny her advancing years by
seeking out younger and younger companions.

"Hi, pumpkin.  How's my favorite daughter?"  Caroline shot him a wry
smile and took the seat he held out for her.  "I'm fine.  And since I'm
your only daughter, your only child, for that matter, that's not much
of a compliment, you know."

"Ah, wall, beautiful as you are I'm sure Jack gives you plenty of
those.  How is he, by the way."  A slight edge entered her father's
voice at the last.  He liked Jack a lot, but he was old-fashioned about
some things, and he had never reconciled himself to their living
arrangement.

"He's fine.  Working hard right now on the electronics factory in
Munich."  The waiter handed them menus and rattled off the luncheon
specials, then discreetly faded away.  "How is Alma?"  Caroline asked
while perusing the menu.

"Right as rain."  Her father's face softened noticeably when he talked
about his third wife.  Alma was short, plump and motherly, and her
father adored her.

"She's volunteering today at the hospital, otherwise she would have
joined us.  She sent her love, though.  And said I was to tell you that
she'd like for you and Jack to come for dinner one night next week. 
She wants you to call her."

"I will.  That would be nice."  Caroline liked her stepmother, but she
was glad Alma hadn't joined them this time.  She needed to talk to her
father alone.  "So how is L'flah?"

"Fine, I guess.  She's still sailing the Caribbean with her child
groom.  You know..."  She batted her eyelashes and imitated her
mother's breathless gush, "Robbie, darling."

"Now, Cato, don't be snide.  Maybe this time she really will find
happiness."

"Maybe," she agreed grudgingly, but she wasn't going to hold her
breath.  Had her mother been in town, Caroline would have gotten a
reality check by taking her out to lunch.  In the marriage department
Charley Smithson was a piker compared to his first wife.  Lilah
Smithson-Grant-Webster-Adamson-Hewlitt-Collins-Robakowski had made a
career out of getting married.  Still... her father had been to the
altar three times himself.

The waiter returned and took their order.  The moment he left her
father took a sip of wine and smiled at her over the rim of the glass.
"Speaking of happiness, when are you and Jack going to get married and
give me a grandchild or two?"

Caroline looked up sharply and narrowed her eyes.  "Has Louise been
talking to you?"  Though her father's feelings on the subject of her
and Jack were no secret, he rarely addressed the matter directly or
prodded her in any way.  Given the state of her emotions lately, this
was just a bit too uncanny for coincidence.

"She may have mentioned that you were feeling down, lately."

"And, I suppose, she also told you her little theory as to the reaSOn,"
Caroline said huffily.  Just wait until she got back to the office. She
was going to tear a strip off Louise.

"Would that be such a bad thing?"  he asked gently.  Reaching across
the table, he took her hand and patted it, his eyes warm.  "Louise is
your friend, sweetheart.  She's concerned about you.  And I happen to
think she's right."

"Well, you're both wrong.  I have no desire to get married.  Or have
children."  She felt suddenly teary and tried to hide behind flippancy.
"Heavens, I learned that lesson watching you and mother.  Why would I
want to mess up my life that way?"  she said with a little chuckle and
an airy wave of her hand.

"I was afraid you felt that way."  His hand squeezed her tighter.
"Caro, sweetheart, not all marriages are doomed.  Just look at Alma and
me.  We've been married twenty-three years."

"But before that you had two failures."

Her father frowned and shifted uncomfortably.  "Sweetheart, listen to
me.  I don't want to blame your mother, but I won't pretend I
understand what drives her.  All I know is I loved her very much, and I
was hurt and angry when she ran off with another man.  I should never
have married Nancy, especially not so SOon after Lilah divorced me.  It
was unfair to her and stupid of me.  My only excuse is my pride had
taken a beating and I guess I was trying to strike back at your mother.
But when I met Alma I knew I had found the right woman.

"Just as Jack is the right man for you.  Please, Caro, don't deny
yourself happiness just because your mother and I made mistakes.
Marriage with the right person can be wonderful.  Take it from me, I
know."

Her father's words touched something deep inside Caroline.  She tried
to dismiss the advice.  She told herself he was just being a protective
father, that she didn't need the traditional trappings.  She was
content with her life exactly as it was.

The more she tried to convince herself, however, the more unhappy she
became Eventually the avowal rang false, even to her own ears, and she
was left with no choice but to do some honest soul-searching.  Was she
truly happy?

She and Jack had been living together for six years.  On the surface
they had the ideal relationship.  God knew, she loved Jack Riley with
all her heart.  He was her soul mate.

Yet Caroline could no longer ignore the truth; in her heart of hearts,
she felt incomplete.  Something was missing.  Something vital.

Was it possible this undefined need that gnawed at her constantly was
for something as ordinary as a husband and a stable family of her own?
Even though she knew, firsthand, just how difficult that was to
achieve?

The very idea scared her witless.  She tried to reject it, but she
could not.  For one thing, she couldn't forget how she'd felt holding
Stephanie's baby.  A sweet rush Of emotions, like nothing she'd ever
experienced, had run through her in a warm flood.  How profoundly moved
she had been just to cradle that tiny human to her breast.  And Amy
wasn't even hers.

How much more acutely would she he affected by a child of her own?

Also, replaying over and over in her mind was Stephanie's comment that
raising a child was the most important job in the world.  It was true,
Caroline realized with a sense of wonder.  She found the enormity of
that truth both daunting and exciting.  She couldn't help but think
that if her own mother had felt the same how different her childhood
might have been.

Over the weeks following Stephanie's visit to Ambience and the lunch
with her father, it seemed to Caroline that suddenly everywhere she
looked there were babies.  Or pregnant women.  Or married couples who
looked, not just in love, but truly happy with one another.

When shopping in department stores she always seemed to wind up in the
infant department, gazing with undeniable longing at lacy little
dresses and tiny booties.

The first thing she turned to when reading the newspaper was the
pictures of engaged or newly married couples.  Once, a picture and
small article about a couple celebrating their fiftieth wedding
anniversary filled her with such choking emotion she had to leave the
room before Jack noticed.  She had locked herself in the bathroom and
wept, though for what, she could not have said.  Not then.

Gradually, however, Caroline came to a painful acceptance.  Though she
and Jack claimed they were commit led to each other, deep down in the
corn of her being, she didn't truly feel secure.  She didn't feel a
sense of permanence, a sense of being half of an unbreakable whole.

Whenever she closed her eyes and tried to imagine them together, as
they were now, in twenty or thirty years, she could not, and that
frightened her.

They loved each other, but they hadn't enough faith in the permanence
of that love to defy the odds and make those solemn vows, before God
and the world," that would bind them together as life partners.

Caroline was not a naive romantic.  She knew full well that wedding
vows did not keep a couple together, but it was that lack of faith in
their love that ate away at her.

Finally she could no longer deny the truth: Louise was fight.  Her
biological clock was ticking loudly, and she could no longer ignore it.
She wanted marriage and a family and all the traditional things that
went along with them.

The question was, could she convince Jack to want the same things?

Caroline stewed over the problem for three days before she worked up
the courage to broach the matter to Jack.  Her hands were sweating and
her stomach felt as though it were tied in a knot when she entered
their apartment that evening, but she was determined to get her
feelings out in the open.  Now that she'd made up her mind, she was
conscious every minute of time inexorably slipping away, and a sense of
urgency consumed her.

"Hi.  I'm home," she called, and winced at the nervous quiver in her
voice.

"Back here," Jack answered.

Caroline closed her eyes for an instant, then drew a deep breath,
crossed her fingers and headed down the hall toward their bedroom.

"Jack, there's something important I wa--"

She stopped cold in the doorway.  "Where are you going?"

Jack looked up from placing a stack of shirts in one of the suitcases
spread across their bed.  The ever-present and endearing errant lock of
hair dangled over his forehead.  With his necktie and collar loosened
and the sleeves of his white dress shirt rolled up he looked so
devastatingly masculine Caroline's heart gave a little bump.

"Munich.  We've got a problem at the site."  "When are you leaving?"

He straightened and glanced at his watch.  "My flight leaves in just
over two hours."

"Two hours?"

"I know.  I'm sorry, sweetheart.  I hate to leave you in such a rush,
but this is important."

"But... but I need to talk to you about something, Jack.  It's
important, too."

"Okay.  Go ahead.  I can talk and pack at the same time."  Detouring by
the door, he bent and bestowed a quick but stirring kiss on her lips.
His eyes caressed her warmly when he straightened.  "But hurry, will
you?  I'm hoping to squeeze in enough time for a proper goodbye before
I leave," he murmured with a lecherous glance at the bed.  He smiled
and chucked her chin, then strode to the dresser and scooped up a stack
of underwear from a drawer.

She watched him recross the room, panic tightening' her chest.  "Jack,
this is not something I want to rush.  This is serious.  It's something
we need to sit down and discuss thoroughly."

"I'm sorry, .  darling, it's either now or when I get back.  Unless you
want to talk about whatever this is over the telephone."

"No.  No, I don't want that."  She sat down on the edge of the bed, and
watched him disappear into the closet, a feeling of despair edging in
on her.  She didn't want to put this off.  Now that she'd made up her
mind, she was anxious to get it all out.  "How long will you be gone?"
she asked when he emerged carting an armload of suits.

He dumped them on the bed and began to fold one of the coats with his
usual quick efficiency and neatness.  "Oh, about six weeks.  Two
months, tops."

"Two month st You've never been gone that long at a stretch before. 
Not even on jobs much bigger than this one."

"I know.  But Melissa pointed out that by the time I get this problem
settled, we'll be about ready to wrap up the project, and I need to be
there for that.  It would be pointless for me to fly home for a few
days, then turn around and fly right back."

Caroline clenched her jaws.  Melissa.  She should have known.

"So what is it that's got you so wound up?  You look tense,
sweetheart."

Caroline twisted her hands together in her lap.  She had no choice but
to tell him now.  She couldn't possibly wait two months.  She'd burst
if she tried.

"Jack, I... I don't know any other way to say this but to come straight
out with it."

He glanced her way as he placed the last of the suits in the case and
frowned.  "Sounds serious.  Is something wrong?"

"No.  At least... I hope you won't think so.  I..."  She sat up
straighter and unconsciously squared her shoulders.  "I want us to get
married."

"What?"  He couldn't have looked more stunned if she had suggested they
jump out the window of their ninth-floor apartment.  "You can't be
serious."  "I am.  Very serious."

"Good grief, Caroline.  Why?  We agreed years ago that neither of us
wanted to make that mistake.  Why would you change your mind now?"

His tone was harsh and exasperated.  Caroline felt the knot in her
stomach squeeze tighter.  "For several reasons," she replied, powerless
to control the quaver in her voice.  "For one thing, I love you and I
want to be your wife."  Her chin began to wobble, and she had to stop
and press her lips together to control it.  Tears threatened, and she
looked at the ceiling and blinked hard.  "I... I want to be connected
to you in a real way."

"You are!"

"No."  She shook her head and gazed at him sadly.

"No, I'm not.  Not really."

"Caroline, you--"

"And there's another reason."  She cut in before he could launch a
full-fledged rebuttal.  She swallowed hard and forced herself to look
him right in the eyes.

"I want to have children."

"Good God."

The exclamation came out low and a bit breathless, as though he'd just
had the wind knocked out of him.  Caroline's hopes sank like a stone in
a pond.

Raking a hand through his hair, Jack turned away.  She stared at his
tense back.  She thought she heard 'him cursing under his breath, and
her heart broke a little.

He swung back abruptly and pinned her with a hard look.  "This doesn't
make any sense.  You and I know how meaningless marriage is.  How
precarious.  We've talked about it a hundred times or more.  Good Lord,
Caro, we both grew up enduring a stream of stepparents, constant
squabbling and fighting between our parents and their spouses of the
moment.

"That is, when they were there.  Hell, I saw more of my baby-sitter
when I was young than my parents.  Then when I was old enough it was
off to boarding school and out of their hair.  Your childhood wasn't
any better.  Do you really want to run the risk of subjecting a child
to that?

"And when it's all said and done, what are we talking about, really?  A
few words on paper that costs you a fortune in attorney's fees to
nullify.  The result is the adults take an emotional and financial
beating, the kids get hurt and the attorneys get richer.  Well, no
thanks."

His words hit her like a slap in the face.  Tears welled in Caroline's
eyes, but she raised her chin and struggled to hold them in check.  "It
doesn't have to be that way.  A lot of couples stay married and raise
happy, well-adjusted children.  To most parents, children are a
blessing they would not trade for anything in the world.

"But you obviously expect us to part someday."  Her voice cracked on
the last and her chin began to wobble even more, but she forced herself
to continue.  "I never realized that before.  Sorry.  My mistake."

"Dammit, I don't think any such thing.  As far as I'm concerned, you
and I are forever.  But splitting up is always a risk in any
relationship.  Highly unlikely in our case, but no matter how small the
risk, it's not 'one I'm willing to inflict on a child.  Not now, not
ever."

He turned away and started slamming and banging drawers and snatching
up items and dumping them into his bags willy-nilly.

"I see," Caroline murmured past the lump in her throat.  She stood as
still as a statue and watched him stomp back and forth across the room,
his face like stone.  His image became a blur as tears banked against
her lower eyelids and slowly spilled over.

"Then you're not even willing to discuss this?"  she asked in a forlorn
little voice.

"No.  We made an agreement and we're sticking to it."

Caroline winced.  She felt guilty about trying to change the rules at
this late date, but she couldn't help it.  She wanted this.  She needed
it.  "Jack that was six years ago.  Things change.  I've changed."
"Well, I haven't."  "But Jack--"

The doorbell rang, and she groaned.  The last thing they needed was an
interruption.

"That'll be Melissa."  Jack snapped the cases closed and glanced at his
watch.  "She's half an hour early,"

"Early for what?  What is she even doing here?  I'll take you to the
airport.  I always do."

"No need.  Melissa and I are sharing a cab."

She stared at him in disbelief.  Fury began to build inside her.  "You
mean, she's going with you to Germany?"

"Don't start, Caroline," he warned.  "I can't deal with your unfounded
jealousy on top of everything else right now."

He could have saved his breath.  After their last fight over Melissa,
Caroline had vowed to keep her suspicions to herself.  She couldn't
make Jack understand that she wasn't jealous; she simply didn't trust
Melissa.  This, however, was too much.

"She's never gone out of town with you before.  I thought her job was
to keep things at the office running smoothly while you were away."

"Normally that's true.  But I'll be gone a long time, and Melissa will
be a big help to me."

"TII just bet she will.  And let me guess.  This was

Melissa's idea, too.  Right?"

"Yes, but--"

"Good grief, Jack, will you wake up?  Can't you see, the woman has her
sights set on you?"

"Caroline, stop it."  He grasped her shoulders and gave her a little
shake.  "You're upset and overemotional.  I love you.  Only you.
Melissa is my assistant

and a competent professional, and I'm damn lucky to have her, but
there is nothing going on between us."

"Not yet.  But if she has her way, there will be before you get back
from Germany."

His face tightened.  Caroline knew he was furious.  "I thought you
trusted me."

"I do.  It's her I don't trust."

"Hell, there's no talking to you on this subject."  He released her,
snatched up the cases and stalked out.  The doorbell rang again as he
headed down the hall with long, angry strides.

Caroline darted after him, following right on his heels like an angry
terrier.  "I don't believe this.  You're furious with me for wanting to
marry you and have a baby.  Yet I'm not supposed to object to you going
on a two-month trip with another woman?"

"Melissa isn't another woman, she's my assistant.  This is a business
trip, not an illicit tryst."

"Ha!"  Caroline buffed and planted her fists on her hips.  "The woman's
a female shark.  Dear heaven, why are men so blind?"

"That's enough, Caroline.  Hopefully, by the time I get back you will
have cooled down.  Maybe then we can discuss this like two rational
adults."

Before she could respond he jerked the door open.  Surprise flashed
across Melissa's perfectly made up face.  As usual, not a single blond
hair was out of place and she looked chic in a fitted designer suit
that showed off a body kept trim and tight by four-a-week visits to a
fitness center.

Caroline had never seen her looking any way but exquisite.  By
comparison, after a long and tiring day dealing with picky customers
and inept suppliers, she knew she probably looked as though she'd been
jerked through a knothole backward.

Melissa blinked and opened her mouth to speak, but Jack stepped out
into the hall, tucked one suitcase under his arm and grasped her elbow.
"C'mon.  Let's go."

"But, Jack... I came early so we could go over a few things."

"We'll do it on the plane."

"Oh.  Yes, of course.  Whatever you say."  She looked curiously from
Jack to Caroline, but she went.

Caroline stepped into the open doorway and watched them, disbelief and
despair settling over her like a sodden cape.  A few feet down the
hallway, Jack halted abruptly, released Melissa and plunked down the
cases and stalked back.  Without so much as a word, he snatched
Caroline into his arms and captured her mouth in a long, angry, but
soul-stirring kiss.

When he released her she was so addled she could only stare after him
as he stalked back to Melissa.  "C'mon, let's go."

Looking back over her shoulder, Melissa aimed a triumphant smirk at
Caroline.  "Don't you worry about Jack, Ms.  Smithson.  I'll take good
care of him."

"Jack, did you hear me?"

A few seconds passed before it registered on Jack that Melissa was
speaking to him.  "What?"  Reluctantly he dragged his gaze from the
pitch-black sky on the other side of the jet's window.  "Sorry.  What
did you say?"

"Jack, is something wrong?  You've been distracted ever since I picked
you up.  You hardly said two words in the taxi."

Normally he did not discuss his personal life with anyone, but
Caroline's bombshell had hit him like a fist in the gut.  Her jealous
outburst about Melissa hadn't helped, either.  He was still reeling,
and Melissa's sympathetic expression was a balm.  "Cato and I had a
disagreement, is all," he muttered.  "She wants to get married and have
a baby."

He scowled.  "I wish to hell I did.  I just don't get it.  From the
beginning we both said we didn't want children or marriage, and she's
always been perfectly happy with that.  Now, all of the sudden, she
does an about-face.  This isn't like Caroline."

"I take it you refused to go along with the idea."  "Damn right."

"You know, Jack, this sort of thing is really not that uncommon for a
woman Caroline's age.  After all, she's... what?  Thirty-six?
Thirty-seven?"  "She just turned thirty-three."

Melissa arched one eyebrow.  "Really.  Hmm, I thought she was much
older.  Anyway, she's probably become aware of her biological clock
ticking down and she's panicked that her youth is slipping away."  '

"Hmm.  I hadn't thought of that."

"It's a perfectly normal thing for older women like Caroline. Although,
I must say, I'm glad you didn't let her trap you into marriage."

Jack frowned.  Trapped was not a word he would ever use in relation to
Caroline.  She was the best thing that had ever happened to him.  Hell,
if she were shackled to him hand and foot for the rest of his life he
wouldn't feel trapped.

Muttering a noncommittal reply, Jack shifted in his seat and returned
his gaze to the night sky.  He regretted now mentioning their fight to
Melissa.  That he had made him feel vaguely disloyal.

"What do you mean, you're moving out?"  Louise jumped up and stalked
across the studio to stand in front of Caroline's desk.  Hands on her
hips, she glared, shock and angry disbelief all over her face.  "Have
you completely lost your mind?  Good Lord, Caro, when I encouraged you
to get married and have

babies, I meant with Jack.  I thought you would bring him around to
your point of view.  I certainly never dreamed you would dump him and
go out looking for another man to father your children.  That's crazy.
You and Jack are perfect for each other."

"I know.  But since he refuses to even consider marriage, much less a
family, that hardly matters, does it?"

"Well ... you caught him off guard, is all.  Once he's thought it over
he may feel differently.  Give the man a chance."

"I have.  He called me when he arrived in Munich, but when I tried to
talk to him about it he just got angry all over again and flatly
refused to consider it."

"That's been what... a week ago?"  At Caroline's nod, Louise leaned
forward and planted her palms on her friend's desk.  "There you go,
then.  He's had a time to think about it, and if you let him know how
important this is to you, I'm sure he'll come around.  Jack adores you.
He wants you to be happy."

"That's just it.  I want him to be happy, too.  I don't want to coerce
him into something he truly doesn't want."  Even if she could persuade
him to get married and start a family, which was a very big if, given
the lackluster state of their relationship the days, he would be doing
it under protest.  She didn't want that.

Louise rolled her eyes and sighed.  "Are you kidding?  I've seen Jack
with kids.  He'd make a terrific father."

"I know, but that's not what he wants."  A dull throbbing had begun in
Caroline's temples.  She grit-ted her teeth and tried to ignore it.
"The devil of it is, I, better than anyone, know why Jack feels this
way, and I understand and respect his opinion.  I simply no longer
share it."

"At least promise me that you'll try to work this out with Jack one
more time before you do anything drastic."

Giving in to the persistent ache, Caroline massaged her temples with
her fingertips.  God knew she didn't want to leave Jack; it would he
like tipping out her heart.  But, she was afraid if they simply
continued the way they were and she denied herself her heart's desire,
she would end up blaming Jack, perhaps even hating him someday.  That
would he horrible.

It would he better to part friends now and get on with their lives,
while they were both still young enough to start over with someone
else.

The thought of Jack with another woman was like a stab in her heart,
but Caroline squelched the pain.  If she and Jack had to part, she
would deal with the hurt then.  She didn't have much hope that he had
changed his mind, but LoUise was tight; she had to find out.

With a sigh, she raised her head and met her partner's anxious stare.
"All fight.  You win.  I'll try to talk to him about it one more time.
He's so busy it's

difficult to track him down during the day.  I'll call him tonight.
It'll be early in the morning in Germany.  I'll catch him before he
leaves to go to the site."

Melissa checked her appearance in the mirror one last time and smiled.
Perfect.  The rose silk blouse and 'form-fitting skirt were seductive
without being obvious.  Pulling out the V neckline of her blouse, she
spritzed perfume down her cleavage, then behind each ear and on her
wrists.  Then for good measure, on the backs of her knees.  Satisfied,
she fluffed her blond page boy, picked up her purse and briefcase and
let herself out of the hotel room.

A little frown creased between her eyebrows as she walked swiftly down
the hall to Jack's room.  If he hadn't been so obtuse, by now they
would be cozily sharing a room instead of having the entire width of
the hotel between them.

Bypassing the company's travel department, she had personally made
their reservations and had requested adjoining rooms with a connecting
door.  However, when they had checked in and Jack had discovered the
arrangement he assumed the hotel had made an error and insisted that
they be put on separate floors.  However, the only room available had
been at the opposite end of the hall from his.

Jack finally answered his door after her third knock.  "Melissa!"  He
ran a hand through his messy hair and glanced at the clock on the
bedside table.  "What are you doing here so early?"

He looked deliciously rumpled and sleepy... and unbearably sexy. Crease
marks from the pillow still crisscrossed one cheek and a dark stubble
shadowed the lower half of his face.  The maroon silk robe he'd hastily
put on gaped wide all the way down to the low-cinched belt, exposing a
beautiful male chest covered with a mat of black hair and an intriguing
mole about a quarter inch to the upper right of his navel. Her fingers
itched to delve through the silky thatch and stroke that velvety dot.

She smiled pleasantly.  "I thought it would save time if we ordered
room service and went over these changes you're putting into the
finished work during breakfast."  Without waiting for an invitation,
she stepped inside, sidling around him, close enough that he couldn't
possibly miss her perfume.

"At-six in the morning?"

She turned and gave him an ingenuous look.  "Oh.  I'm sorry, is this
too early for you?  I'm such an early bird, I sometimes forget that
other people aren't.  I can come back later, if you'd like."

Jack hesitated, then shrugged and closed the door, tightening the belt
on the robe as he walked barefoot back into the room.  "No, that's
okay.  Now that I'm up I couldn't go back to sleep anyway.  Just give
me a few minutes to shave and shower.  While I do, you can order
breakfast for us."

"Certainly.  Do you have a preference?"

"Make mine two eggs, over easy, and all the trimmings," he called from
the bathroom.

A fcv minutes later she had just hung up after placing the order with
room service when the telephone rang.

Melissa's gaze narrowed on the instrument Only one person would be
calling Jack at that hour.  Deliberately making her voice husky, she
picked up the receiver and murmured a sleepy, "Hello?"

A moment of heavy silence followed, then a hesitant, "I'm sorry.  The
operator must have put me through to the wrong room.  I was calling
Jack Riley."  "Wait!  Don't hang up.  This is Jack Riley's room."

The silence again, longer this time.  Melissa smiled.

"Miss Smithson?  Is that you?"

"Yes," came the dull reply.

"I'm sorry, Jack can't come to the phone right now.  He's in the
shower."  Melissa glanced at the closed bathroom door.  From the other
side came the sound of water running.  "I am glad you called,

though.  I want to thank you."

"Thank me?  For what?"

"For pressing Jack to get married and start a family.  It was just the
push he needed to make the break and do what he's been wanting to do
for months."

"And that would be?"

"Why, turn to me, of course."  She waited a beat to let that soak in,
then added.  "I'm very grateful.  By the way, that mole just above his
belly button is delicious, isn't it."

With a quiet click, the telephone went dead.

Chapter Three

With Louise's reluctant assistance, Caroline moved into her new
apartment the next weekend.  All she took with her, other than her
personal belongings, were a few dishes, the furniture from the guest
bedroom and a chair from the living room, all of which she intended to
return as soon as the new furniture she had ordered was delivered. When
they had unpacked and stowed everything the place looked empty and
forlorn.

"This is downright depressing," Louise grumbled, looking around.  "You
sure you don't want to change your mind?  We could take it all back and
Jack would never know."

"No.  I've made up my mind.  This is for the best."  Louise sighed, but
she didn't argue.  She knew Caroline too well for that.  When she
decided on a course of action she saw it through.

They both knew it had been Caroline's strength, her determination and
grit, that had allowed them to make a success of the business they had
started on a shoestring ten years before.  Many times in those early
years, Louise would have given up and thrown in the towel had it not
been for her.  They were the same traits Caroline called on to solve
her current dilemma.

Parting with Jack was the hardest thing she ever had to do, but it was
necessary--for both their sakes.  The simple truth was, they had come
to a point in their lives where their desires and needs had taken
separate paths.  It hurt--oh, how it hurt--to know that he had turned
to someone else without being open and honest with her, but she knew
that anger sometimes clouded judgment.  And Jack had certainly been
angry when he left--and, in all honesty, she supposed he'd had every
right to be.  She, after all, had been the one reneging on their
agreement.

Even though her heart was breaking, she had no intention of standing in
the way of Jack's happiness.  Nor would she let him stand in the way of
hers.

Caroline and Louise spent the next hour clearing the apartment of boxes
and packing material and cleaning up.  The sudden ring of the telephone
just after midnight made both women jump.

"Good heavens," Louise exclaimed, fluttering her hand over her heart as
Caroline headed for the tele phone.  "If that's Roger tell him I'm on
my way."  "Hello."

"Hello, sweetheart."

Caroline Ds voice frosted over and her hand tightened around the
receiver.  "Hello, Jack."

"Jack!"  Louise exclaimed in a loud whisper.  "Uh-oh.  It's going to
hit the fan now."

"Thank God, I finally caught you at home.  Where've you been?  I've
been calling you every day, at home and at Ambience, but you're never
at either place.  And you never called me back.  Didn't you get the
messages !  left with Louise?"

Oh, yes, she'd gotten them all right... and promptly tossed them into
the trash.  "Sorry.  i've been busy."

A beat of silence followed.  "Caro?  Is something wrong?  You sound...
different.  You're not still upset over that little disagreement we
had, are you?"

"It hardly matters, one way or the other, does it?"  she replied in the
same cold voice.  Little disagreement?  That little disagreement
changed the course of her life.  Jack's, too.  He just didn't know it
yet.  "Of course it ma--"

"I'm tired, Jack.  I really don't feel like talking.  Besides,
shouldn't you be getting back to Melissa?"

"Ah, c'mon, Caroline," Jack groaned.  "Don't start that again."  She
could almost see him shaking his head and grinding his teeth. "Damreit,
I didn't call you long-distance to fight."

"Then perhaps we should hang up."

"Okay, I get it.  You're still angry.  Fine.  When you get over your
pout, give me a call."

He hung up before she could reply, but as she returned the receiver to
its cradle with more force than necessary she muttered, "Don't hold
your breath."

"How did Jack get this number so fast?"  Louise asked, watching her
with a worried expression.  "What did he say?  Was he furious?"

"He doesn't have this number.  I'm having the calls to our apartment
forwarded to this phone."

"Then, he doesn't know yet that you're leaving him?"  Louise rolled her
eyes when Caroline shook her head.  "When, pray tell, do you plan to
tell the man?"

"I'll explain everything to him as soon as he returns.  There's no
point in telling him now.  He's in the middle of wrapping up a major
project.  He doesn't need any more problems at the moment.  Besides,
he's got Melissa, so what does it matter."

"Cato, are you absolutely sure there's hanky-panky going on there?
Maybe there was a perfectly legitimate professional reason for her
being in Jack's room that morning."

"At six in the morning?  While he was in the shower?  Oh, please."

"Well ... there could have been," Louise persisted, but her sulky voice
lacked conviction.

"Oh really?  And what about Jack's tummy mole?  I suppose there's a
perfectly logical and professional reason why she would know about
that, too."

"Sure ... well ... may he Oh, I don't know.  My point is, this seems a
cold way to end a seven-year relationship."

"Not at all.  This is perfect.  When Jack and I got together we
promised each other that if at anytime either of us wanted out, for
whatever reason, we would make the break quick and clean, and it would
be amicable--no recriminations or anger or arguments.

"When he returns the whole thing will be a fait accompli By then I will
have established myself as a single woman and gotten on with my life
and he'll discover he's free to make whatever changes in his that he
wants.  No mess, no emotional turmoil, no lingering regrets on either
side.  Don't worry, he'll accept my decision without a fuss.  With
Melissa in the picture, he'll probably be grateful."

Louise snorted.  "Yeah, right."

After living seven years as half of a couple, adjusting to the single
life wasn't easy.  It was, Caroline discovered, downright depressing.

Word of their breakup spread fast among their friends and
acquaintances.  With the exception of a handful of people, she told
everyone that the Parting had been a mutual and amicable decision.
Everyone was shocked.  Most, it seemed, had thought of them as the
perfect couple.

Several unmarried friends volunteered to help her ease back into the
swing of things.  One night she went with two of them to a singles' bar
but she stayed less than an hour.  She had never seen so many people
working so hard to convince themselves they were having a good time.
The atmosphere of manic desperation and false gaiety saddened her, and
not even under pain of death would she have gone out with any of the
men who approached her.

Another well-meaning friend invited her over for dinner to meet her
cousin Harry, an accountant.  He was a nice enough man, but he had the
personality of a mud fence and at forty-one he still lived at home with
his mother.

A single man in her building asked her out but something about him made
Caroline nervous--he was too eager, too friendly too soon.  She could
easily picture him turning into a stalker.

She went to church socials, museums, parties, wine tastings, a ski
weekend for singles.  Once, she even went to a Laundromat, an
experience that weeks later still made her shudder to think of it.
Nowhere did she meet anyone who remotely measured up.

"You know what your problem is, don't you?"  Louise commented when
Caroline.  finished one of her laments on the single scene.  "You're
comparing every man you meet to Jack.  Face it, Cato, not many men can
measure up to a hunk like that."

It was true, Caroline realized.  While not male-model handsome, Jack
possessed rugged' looks and a potent masculinity that drew stares from
women.  An intensely sexy and sensual man, he was also intelligent,
articulate, warm, thoughtful and even tempered--unless provoked.  Then
he exploded with a wrath that made grown men quake.

Louise was right: Jack Riley was going to be a hard act to follow.  But
surely there was someone out there who could.  Caroline refused to
believe otherwise.

However, five weeks after moving into her own apartment, she was no
closer to meeting someone with whom she might possibly build a future
than she had been the first day.  It was depressing.  She was beginning
to think she might have to consider going to a sperm bank in order to
have the child she wanted so much.  Half a dream was better than none,
after all.

A few well-meaning friends offered to fix Caroline up With blind dates
but she declined.  She wasn't that desperate.  Not yet.

In all that time she had heard nothing from Jack, but that didn't
surprise her.  When he bowed his neck the man was mule stubborn.  He
was so sure she would reconsider and call him.

Caroline knew Jack too well to believe he would two-time.  He probably
had the brush-off speech he intended to give her ready.  No doubt, he
placed the blame for their breakup on her shoulders, she thought
sourly.

Keeping her anger whipped up helped her deal with the pain of losing
Jack, but it did not banish it completely.  She missed him
terribly--missed seeing that rugged face, that untamable lock of hair
dangling over his forehead, missed touching his sandpapery jaw at the
end of the day, running her fingers through his black hair, missed the
deep rumble of his voice, the smell of him.  She even missed the
clutter of his masculine accouterments on the bathroom counter, and
having to put the toilet seat down a dozen times a day.

Most of all, dear God, how she missed making love with him.

When the yearning got too strong she reminded herself of why she was
putting herself through this torture.  She could have Jack, or she
could have a family, but not both.  She had made her choice, and though
her heart ached, deep down Caroline knew she had made the right one.
Even without Melissa in the picture, she would still have made the same
decision.

"I can't believe it," Melissa enthused.  "We're almost finished, and
we're coming in ahead of schedule.  Everything is up and running.  Just
a few more days of testing and the factory will be operational and we
turn it over to Cyber-Tech."

"Um," Jack grunted, and pushed through the front door of the hotel.  He
strode across the lobby to the desk, barely aware of Melissa at his
side, almost trotting to keep up.

He retrieved a stack of messages from the desk clerk and began going
through the slips of paper on the way to the elevator, his frown
deepening when he

failed to spot Caroline's name on any of them.  Dammit he hadn't heard
a peep out of her in five weeks.  This wasn't like Caroline to hold on
to anger this long.  Wadding the messages, he stuffed them into his
trouser pocket.  Dammit.  He'd had enough of this.

He left the elevator and stalked down the hall to his room.  Inside, he
marched straight to the bed, sat down on the edge and reached for the
telephone.  He hadn't realized that Melissa had followed him inside
until she spoke.

"For heaven's sake, Jack, did you even hear what I said?"

He looked around at her and frowned.  "Melissa.  What're you doing in
here?  I thought you were going to your room."

"I am.  But first I wanted us to make some plans."  "What kind of
plans?"  "Well, first of all, I thought tonight maybe we could
celebrate the end of the project with a cozy dinner and dancing."

"Dancing?"  He raised his eyebrows, then shook his head.  "I don't
think so."

"Oh.  I guess you're tired.  Well, then, how abOUt this.  We have
sortie free time while the testing is being done.  Why don't we book a
trip?"  Smiling seductively, she stepped closer and ran her fingertips
along his shoulder and down his bicep.  The look in her eyes invited.
"We could travel around Germany, just the two of us, see the sights,
may he stay in a romantic castle.  What do you say?  It would he fun. I
promise you."

Jack's eyes narrowed.  He shifted on the bed, breaking contact with
that exploring finger.  "Sorry.  I can't."

Melissa's expression changed instantly from coaxing to sulky.  "Why
not?"  she whined.

"Because those are the kinds of things I only do with Caroline."

"Oh, for heaven's sake!  Caroline, Caroline, Caroline!  I'm sick to
death of hearing that name.  There are other women in the world, you
know.  I've been trying to call that to your attention ever since you
hired me.  I thought this time together would finally open your eyes,
but for five weeks you've been so preoccupied over your little argument
with Caroline you don't see what's right under your nose."

Jack got to his feet slowly.  He stood with his hands on his hips and
studied her.  "My God.  Caroline was right about you all along.  You
are trying to seduce me."

She gave her blond hair a defiant toss and raised her chin.  "What if I
am?  What's wrong with that?  It's not as though you and your precious
Caroline are married or anything."  Her expression underwent another
rapid change, and she stepped forward, pouting prettily, and placed her
palms flat on his chest.  "You and I will be terrific together, Jack,"
she murmured in a husky, hot voice.  "I promise."

She started to slide her hands up over his shoulders, but Jack caught
her wrists and pushed her away.  "Go pack your things, Melissa.  You're
flying back to Houston on the first available flight.  As of this
moment, you're no longer on my staff."

"What!  You can't fire me!  I'll... I'll sue you for unlawful dismissal
if you even try it."

"I'm not going to fire you."  Stepping around her, Jack went to the
door and opened it wide.  "But I am going to transfer you to another
department.  Effective immediately upon your return to the home
office.

Now please leave."

Melissa hesitated only a moment, just long enough to catch that
implacable glint in his eyes.

With another toss of her hair, she puffed up like a toad and stomped
past him.  She was so angry she looked ready to explode.

"Oh, by the way, Melissa," Jack said in a silky voice.  She halted a
few feet down the hall and cast a sullen look over her shoulder.  "I'd
be careful about threatening to sue if I were you.  Just remember,
sexual harassment runs both ways these days."

It took Jack forty-nine hours to shake loose from the Cyher-Tech
project and fly back to Houston.  Technically he should have stayed in
Munich for the formal ribbon cutting and transfer ceremony, but for
weeks he'd had a gut feeling that something was wrong at home.  The
scene with Melissa had only served to increase his uneasiness.

He landed in Houston a little before six, and it took another hour to
clear customs, retrieve his bags and get a taxi home.  The instant he
let himself in the front door he knew he'd been right to worry.  There
were no lights on and there was an unnatural silence in the apartment.
Something was definitely wrong.

Jack flicked on the entryway light, then the ones in the living room.
"Caro?  You here?"

The sound of his voice seemed to echo through the apartment, mocking
him.  Where was she?  Had she gone out with friends or a client?  Maybe
she was working late at Ambience.

Jack glanced into the living room and frowned.  Something wasn't quite
right there, but he didn't waste time ferreting the work out exactly.
Maybe she had fallen asleep when she got home from work.  He strode
down the hall, turning on lights and calling, "Caroline?  Caroline,
where are you?"

Just inside their bedroom he jerked to a stop and stared across the
room at the dresser.  His heart began to boom.  The top of the polished
cher-wood piece of furniture normally held Caro's jewelry box and her
collection of perfumes.  The heavenly, feminine scents coming from that
collection of cut-crystal atomizers were a sensual delight that he had
always found provocative and arousing.  Now the dresser top was
empty.

Slowly his head swiveled, taking in the rest of the room.  Not a
single item belonging to Caroline was in sight.

Clenching his jaws, Jack stomped across to the gigantic walk-in closet
they shared and jerked the doubled wide doors open.  His heart boomed
harder, as though it were going to bludgeon itself right out of his
chest.  Caroline's side of the closet was empty.  All that was left
were a few empty hangers and a torn dry cleaner's bag lying on the
floor.

She was gone.  Caroline had left him.

A vicious pain sliced through Jack.  Following hard on its heels was
fury.

"The hell she has," he growled as he spun and stalked out of the
room.

Twenty minutes later he burst through the door at Ambience, sending it
crashing back against the wall.

Louise nearly jumped right out of her chair.  "Jack!"

"All right.  Where is she?"  he demanded after one quick glance at
Caroline's empty desk.  "I... uh... she, uh... that is..."  "Spit it
out, Louise."

"She, uh ... she we-went home early to get ready for a da-- Uh, for an
appointment."

"And just where is 'home' for Caroline these days?"

"Well... I'm not sure I should--"

"Give it to me, Louise.  Now!"  He banged his fist on her desk to
emphasize the last, and Louise jumped and quickly scribbled the address
on a slip of paper.

Jack snatched it out of her hand and whirled around without a word.

Wide-eyed, Louise watched him stomp out.  She flinched when the door
crashed shut behind him.  "Whooie, Caro, are you ever in for it now."

Chapter Four.

A blind date.  Caroline groaned.  Oh, Lord, what had she been thinking?
She couldn't believe she had actually agreed to go out on a blind
date.

The act of the truly desperate.

Caroline grimaced at her reflection in the mirror as she slipped her
earrings on.  "It's going to be a disaster.  You know that, don't you?
In six weeks you haven't met anyone you would give a second look.  What
on earth makes you think your friends can do any better?  This is
pathetic, Cato.  Really pathetic."

Her date was Lester Killibrew.  She rolled her eyes.  Heaven help her,
even his name sounded nerdy.

The doorbell rang, and Caroline jumped.  She pressed her pall to her
abdomen.  Oh, Lord, she felt nauseated.

Gritting her teeth, she headed for the.  front door.  Before she could
get there the bell rang again.  Oh, great.  The impatient type.

She paused in the small entryway, drew a deep breath and pasted a smile
on her face.  Then she -reached for the knob.  "Good eve-- Jack!"

"Yes, Jack."  Before she could stop him or even think, he stepped
inside, took the door from her nerveless hand and slammed it shut with
enough force that it banged against the frame like a pistol shot.
Caroline jumped and took a step backward.  Jack advanced, his head
thrust forward.

"Now, my darling.  Would you care to explain just what the bloody hell
is going on?"

He was angrier than Caroline had ever seen him.  Fury darkened his face
and a muscle jerked and quivered along his clenched jaw.  Low pitched
and rough, his voice reminded her of the ominous rumble that precedes
an earthquake.  Had he been a man prone to violence, Caroline would
have been terrified.

As it was, she was so uneasy she felt as though she were about to jump
right out of her skin.

That did not, however, prevent a burst of joy from swelling her heart.
She gazed at that beloved face, fierce now and tight with rage, and
wanted to cover it with kisses.  Her fingers itched to smooth back that
inevitable dangling curl over his forehead, to winnow through that
thick shock of hair and explore the warmth of his scalp.

His scent tantalized her, dark and musky, and uniquely Jack.  Like the
moons inexorable pull on the tides, his body drew hers.  Between them,
from the moment they met, there had always been this magnetic
attraction, and neither time nor rage nor all the intellectualizing in
the world could diminish it.  Every cell in Caroline's body quivered.
She had to grit her

teeth and curl her hands into fists at her sides just to stop from
flinging herself into his arms.

However, no matter how glad she was to see him, she was not about to
let him barge in and steam roll over her.  Jack was a take-charge,
dominant man.  It was his nature to assume command.  The only way to
prevent that was to stand toe-to-toe with him.

Caroline stuck out her chin.  "I should think that's obvious."

"All that's obvious is I leave for a few weeks, and out of the blue,
you pack up and move out of our apartment.  No explanation, no
discussion, no nothing.  You didn't even have the decency to tell me
you were leaving, much less why!"

"I told you why.  I want to get married and have a baby.  You made it
clear both times I tried to talk to you about it that I couldn't expect
either of those things from you."

"That's it?  This nonsense about motherhood and happily ever after?
That's the reason you left me?  I don't believe this!  Have you gone
nuts?  You're willing to throw away what we have for marriage and
diapers and a home in the suburbs?"

Caroline's chin went up another notch.  "It isn't nonsense.  And
there's also the matter of Melissa."

An odd look flashed across his face.  "Look, about--"

The door hell rang.  Jack whipped his head around and scowled at the
wooden panel.  "Who the hell is that?"

"That's, uh... well... that's probably my date."  His head snapped
back.  "Your what?"

He didn't wait for a reply.  Taking a quick step to the door, he jerked
it open.

"Beat it!"  he barked, and slammed the door in the man's face.

Caroline caught only a glimpse of a bouquet of flowers and a startled
expression.  "Jack!  What do you think you're doing?"

"Tm doing the guy a favor."

"This happens to be my--"

The bell rang again, and his scowl darkened.  "TII get it.  Jack, don't
you dare--"

Ignoring her, he snatched the door open again and thrust his face into
that of the other man.  "Listen, you.  Either you get out of here right
now under your own steam or I'm going to beat the living hell out of
you and throw you out.  Got it?"

"Wh-who are you?"

"Tm Caroline's lover.  And I don't share what's mine.  Now hit the
road."

Lester Killibrew looked shocked and flustered, but he gamely glanced
over Jack's shoulder and caught Caroline's eye.

"Ms.  Smithson?"

Color flooded her face.  Wincing, she gave him a chagrined look.  "I'm
terribly sorry about this Mr.  Killibrew.  Honestly I am.  But...
well... perhaps it would be best if you do as he says."

"Are you going to be all right?"  he asked tentatively, which Caroline
thought was very sweet, given the fact that Lester was a good five
inches shorter and at least fifty pounds lighter that Jack.

"Yes.  I'll be fine.  Don't worry."

Looking unconvinced, Lester shifted from one foot to the other. Finally
he attempted to hand Caroline the bouquet, but Jack blocked the move. 
Jutting his face forward until his nose was barely an inch from the
smaller man's, he growled, "Git.  Now.  And take your damn posies with
you."

"Jack Riley, that was the most uncouth, rude, disgustingly overbearing
thing you have ever done!"  Caroline raged the instant he turned from
slamming the door in Lester's face for the second time.

Ignoring the scathing reprimand, Jack launched an attack of his own.
"So this is what you've been up to while I've been gone.  While I've
been missing you and working my buns off just so I could get back
sooner and patch things up between us, you've been trolling for a
husband to replace me.  Just how many men have you been out with in the
past six weeks?"  "That's none of your business"

"How many?"  he roared, and Caroline jumped.

She clasped her hands together to keep them from trembling and raised
her chin.  "Actually ... Lester was the first."

"And he's damn well going to be the last."

"Now see here, Jack Riley--" she began, but he stomped past her and
into the living room.

In the middle of the floor he stopped and raked a hand through his
hair.  "Damn.  I should have known you wouldn't let go of this marriage
business.  Once you get an idea in your head, you're as tenacious as a
damn terrier."

He swung back to face her, his expression accusing.  "But why this way,
Caro?  Why didn't you wait and talk to me about this?  How could you
just move out behind my back?  How could you do that to me?  To us?"

Caroline chewed her lower lip as guilt flooded her.  Because, God help
me, I knew if I didn't you would talk me out of going, she thought with
despair.  The way you've always been able to persuade me to do whatever
you wanted.

"I tried talking to you.  Remember?"  she said in a shaky voice.  "But
you wouldn't listen.  And you made it clear that you wouldn't change
your mind.  Since I won't change mine either, I saw no point in
prolonging my decision.

"I planned to tell you as soon as you got back.  I thought you would
call and let me know when you were arriving so I could pick you up at
the airport,

like always.  It was never my intention for you to come home and find
me gone."

"Thanks a lot.  Why the hell didn't you just call me in Germany and
break the news?"  He snorted and shot her a scornful look.  "Hell, I
would have thought that would have been the easiest way out."

Caroline wrung her hands.  "I wasn't looking for the easiest way out,
Jack.  Just the quickest and most painless for both of us.  I ... I
figured you had enough to worry about with the Munich project."

He went utterly still, as if he were a predator spotting a weakness in
his prey.  "So ... you're saying that even when you were walking out on
me you were concerned about me?"  The slow smile that curved his mouth
was rife with triumph.  "You still love me, Caroline.  That proves it.
Don't try to deny it."

"Oh, Jack.  Of course I still love you."  Her voice held a wealth of
sadness.  So did the look she gave him.  "I suppose I'll always love
you.  This has nothing to do with my feelings for you."

Instead of discouraging him, he looked even more pleased and started
toward her with a seductive smile.  Caroline frowned, realizing the
admission was a mistake.  Show Jack the least vulnerability and he used
it to his advantage.  She quickly changed tact, resuming an annoyed
expression.

"Anyway, I don't know why you're making so much of this.  We agreed
from the start that if either of us wanted out, no matter the reason,
we would be free to leave, no questions asked and no hard feelings."

That stopped him in his tracks.  "To hell with that!"  he roared.  "I
don't give a good tinker's damn what we said six years ago.  I'm not
giving you up without a fight, no matter what screwy, hare-brained
notions you've gotten into your head.  I don't know how you could even
think for a minute that I would."

"Given your affair with Melissa, it wasn't difficult to imagine, I
assure you."

"My what?  Dammit, Caro, I didn't have an affair with Melissa."  He
gestured sharply with his hands.  "All right.  Let's get this business
out of the way once and for all.  I'll admit, I owe you an apology. You
were right.  She was on the make.  When I finally tumbled to that, I
got rid of her.  I had her transferred to the Los Angeles office.  If I
hadn't been worried she would sue the company for wrongful dismissal I
would have fired her.

"I'm sorry I didn't listen to you and that you were upset, but believe
me, sweetheart, you never had anything to worry about.  So can we just
forget about Melissa?  She's out of our lives and no longer a factor in
this situation."

"Jack, please.  Don't treat me like an idiot.  I called your room one
morning at six and Melissa answered the telephone.  You were in the
shower."

"What?  She never told me you called!"

"Yes, well, even if the hour and the circumstances hadn't convinced
me, she made sure I knew that you were lovers.  She even knew about the
mole by your belly button."

"That bitch.  That dirty, rotten..."  Biting off the vile epithet, he
stepped closer, grasped her upper arms and looked her in the eyes, his
gaze direct and intense.  "Caroline, have I ever lied to you?  Have I?"
he demanded when she hesitated.

She shook her head slowly.  "No."

"Right.  And I'm not lying to you now.  So get this through your
head--I am not having, nor have I ever had, an affair with Melissa.  Or
anyone else, for that matter.  I love you.  You're the only woman I
want."  She searched his face and that intense blue stare and saw the
honesty there, and a sweet relief swept through her.  "Do you believe
me?"  he asked finally.

She nodded slowly, her eyes sad.  "Yes.  I believe you--at least, I
believe you believe what you're saying."

He scowled.  "What the hell does that mean?"  "Just that I think we've
grown apart.  Lately ... I've felt that you don't love me as deeply as
you once did--"

"What!  That's crazy!  Dammit!  I adore you, woman!"  he insisted in a
decidedly unloverlike roar that made her jump.

"Jack, for the past year you were hardly ever around and when you were
here you were so wrapped up in your work I could have tap-danced naked
on top of your desk and you wouldn't have noticed."

An arrested look came over his face, and she got the distinct feeling
he was picturing that scenario.  She was certain of it when a glint of
wicked amusement softened his scowl ever so slightly.  "Believe me,
sweetheart, I would have noticed.  I would have had you on your back
before you completed three steps."

She chose to ignore that.  "The point is, you say you love me, but I
think you're just used to me.  I've become more of a comfortable habit
in your life than anything else."  Her shoulders lifted in a
disconsolate little shrug and she looked away to keep him from seeing
the pain in her eyes.  "Quite frankly, it occurred to me that, once you
got over the shock of me leaving, you might actually be relieved."

"what?"  He looked thunderstruck.  ""Dammit, Caroline, that's
insulting!  Look, I know the past year has been difficult.  I'll admit
I've been busy and preoccupied with the Germany project, but I had no
idea you would interpret that to mean I was losing interest in you!  I
don't get it.  I've been wrapped up in projects before and it never
bothered you.  Why now?"

"I don't know.  It was just... different this time.  You were
constantly distracted.  And there was Melissa always hovering around.
You spent more time with her than with me."

"Ah, I see.  You were feeling neglected.  And maybe even jealous.
That's what this is really all about, isn't it?"

Caroline shook her head sadly.  "You really don't understand, do you?
Those things were just secondary.  Perhaps they provided the push I
needed to make the break, but I would have come to the same decision
eventually, regardless.

"Jack, I want the white picket fence and the two o'clock feedings and
era yon drawings on the refrigerator.  I know that you don't want that,
and I don't expect you to understand, but I've reached a point in my
life where I need those things."

"I do understand.  You're running up against that biological thing.
It's that sneaky, maternal urge that Mother Nature programmed into
women rearing its head.  But, honey, these yearnings will pass.  It's
just a temporary thing, you'll see.  We'll work through it, Cato.
Together.  And once we get past it you'll be glad you didn't succumb. I
promise you."

"Oh, Jack."  Caroline looked at him sadly.  "You're so wrong.  This
isn't some whim that's going to blow over with time.  This is a longing
so basic and so strong that I can't ignore it.  Believe me, I've tried,
but it won't go away.

"I want the total commitment of marriage, Jack.  And I want at least
one child--someone to nourish and cherish and love and mold into a fine
human bing Someone who is a part of me.  I would like for my baby to be
a part of you, too, but since that isn't what you want, I have to find
someone else, and I have to do it now.  Time is running out for me."

"Come on, Caro.  Is having a kid really more important to you than
us?"

"Not more important, but just as important.  I wanted you and marriage
and a family, but I finally realized that I had to choose one or the
other."

"So you chose having a kid," he said with unmistakable anger.

"Only because I was afraid that if I didn't, I would always regret it,
that I might even end up resenting you, even hating you for it.  I
didn't want that."

"It would never happen.  I wouldn't let it," he said with all his
natural arrogance.  "Look, I think you've blown this all out of
proportion, Caro.  You've been upset with me and unhappy and you're
letting it cloud your judgment.  I'm not going to allow you to throw
away what we have together over some illogical, irrational
hormone-driven urge."

Irrational and illogical, was she?  Caroline's chin came up.  "I'm
afraid you don't have any choice.  I've made the break, and it's final.
You and I are through."

"Oh, yeah?  Why don't we put that to the test."  She didn't like the
sound of that--or the sudden predatory look in his eyes.  "What do you
me--?"  Her eyes widened as he took off his coat and tossed it onto the
sofa.  "What're you doing, Jack?"

Calmly, never taking his eyes from her, he slipped off his tie and
tossed it on his coat, and went to work on the buttons of his shirt as
he started toward her.  Carolin backed away warily.  "Now, Jack, you
just stay away from me."

He shook his head slowly, a diabolical gleam in his eyes.  "Uh-uh.  Not
on your life."

Caroline's heart stuttered, then took off at a gallop.  She knew that
look.  It was the same one that he always got when he came home from a
trip.  Jack was a highly sexed and sexy man, but he was also faithful,
and after prolonged periods of abstinence he always fell on her like a
hungry wolf, dragging her off to bed the instant he walked in the
door.

She backed away another step--two, then three.  "Now, Jack, stop this
right now."

His throaty chuckle sent prickles racing down her spine.  He stalked
her as if he were a big, sleek cat, his loose-limbed stride fluid and
relentless.

Caroline knew if he touched her she would be lost.  Jack could turn her
into a mass of quivering jelly with one kiss, or merely a look.  Her
pride told her to stand her ground and defy him, but she knew a lost
cause when she saw one.

She backed into the sofa, and quickly sidled around the end.  Jack
followed.

"Jack will you listen to reason?"

"When you're willing to be reasonable, yes."

The backs of her calves hit the footstool and she nearly toppled
backward.  Flailing her arms, she regained her balance and quickly
scooted around it to take refuge behind a Queen Anne chair.

Jack kicked the stool out of the way and kept coming at her with that
same purposeful stalk, that same wicked gleam in his eyes.

"Jack, this is silly."

"This whole damn situation is silly.  That's why I'm going to put an
end to it."

"Now, Jack, I'm warning you..."  She gripped the back of the chair
tightly, watching him closely to see which way he skirted around it,
preparing to go in the opposite direction.  Her eyes widened and she
gasped when he simply grabbed one arm and shoved it aside, sending it
tumbling as easily as he had the footstool

Caroline gave a little squeak and turned to run, but she was too late.
Jack snagged her wrist and whipped her around, using her momentum to
propel her up against his chest and into his arms.

The impact was stunning.  The feel of that familiar, masculine body
against her softness was heavenly.  On principle she splayed her' hands
on that broad chest and strained against his hold, but in her heart of
hearts she knew it was useless.  It felt too good already, just being
back in his arms, and he.  hadn't even kissed her yet.

His scent surrounded her, a heady maleness that made her head spin and
started a quiver deep inside

her.  It felt wonderful being held in his arms again.  She looked up
into those vivid blue eyes, watching her so intently, and felt her
heart turn over.  It had been six long weeks since she'd seen him,
since she'd touched him, and, Lord, she had missed him so.

Immediately she reminded herself that she had better get used to being
without him.

She pushed harder at his chest.  "Jack, this isn't going to solve
anything.  Let me go."

"No.  Never."  His gaze roamed her face, hot and hungry and shockingly
possessive.  "You and I were meant for each other, Caro, and you know
it.  I love you now more than ever, and I'll go right on loving you
until the day I die."  His gaze zeroed in on her mouth, and he tipped
his head to one side, bending closer.  "You're not a habit in my life,
my darling," he growled against her lips.  "You're an addiction.  One I
can't live without."

A moan tumbled from Caroline's throat, part ecstasy, part despair. Jack
caught the sound in his mouth as his lips settled over hers.

The kiss seared her all the way to her toes.  It was openmouthed and
wet and greedy and hot, shimmering with pent-up passions.  Caroline
could no more have resisted than she could have flown to the sun.  With
a desperate little whimper, she clutched his open shirt in both hands
and sagged against him.  She felt as though every cell in her body was
melting.

A low sound of satisfaction rumbled from Jack's throat.  Tightening his
arms around her, his mouth still fastened to hers, he sank With her to
the floor.

Caroline felt the soft nap of the oriental rug against her back above
the scoop neckline of her dress, against her calves, prickling slightly
in the mesh of her stockings.  She didn't resist or even question the
foolishness of making love on the floor when there was a bed just a few
steps away.  Her defenses breached, she was as frantic and desperate
for him as he was for her.  It had been so long, and she had missed him
so.

"Oh, sweetheart, I missed you."  Jack ground out the words in a
guttural voice, echoing her feelings.  "I can't get enough of you. I'll
never get enough of you."

"I know.  I know," Caroline agreed breathlessly.  Something niggled at
her mind, as her head rolled from side to side in restless passion.
Something important she needed to tell Jack, but she couldn't think
when he was touching her like that... "I love you, Caro.  I need
you."

Her eyes opened and a groan slid from her throat as she remembered what
it was.  Her fingers dug into his shoulders.  "Jack... Jack, we can't.
I... I'm not on the pill anymore."

He stilled, and she felt the quivering tautness of his muscles as he
fought for control.  He raised himself and looked at her.  His eyes
blazed and his face was flushed and rigid with desire.  Breath left his
lungs in

ragged gasps and his nostrils fl axed For an instant she thought he
would withdraw from her, and she braced for it, but instead he bit out
a vicious curse and growled, "We'll have to risk it.  I have to have
you, dammit.  Now."

"But, Jack--"

His mouth closed over hers, ending the protest, and Caroline was lost.
Whatever tiny amount of sanity and willpower she possessed went flying
right out the window.

She pulled his shirt free of his trousers and ran her hands beneath it,
clutching his shoulders, his back.  When her hands encountered his
trousers she tried to run her hands beneath the waistband but there
wasn't room, and she frantically sought his belt buckle.

In response to her silent quest, Jack rolled with her until they were
lying on their sides, facing each other.  Sucking in a sharp breath, he
went utterly still as her deft fingers dealt with buckle, button and
zipper.  Slipping inside, her hands stroked over the bulge beneath the
white cotton Jockey shorts, then slipped beneath the elastic waistband
and cupped him.  Jack growled and yanked down the zipper on the back of
her dress and unfastened her bra.

In a frenzy of tugging and fumbling, they worked to rid each other of
their clothes.  Jack managed to work Caroline's arms out of the
sleeves.  of her dress.  He climbed to his knees and with a furious
yank, he peeled the garment, along with her bra, down her body.  In the
next instant both went sailing over his shoulder.  Moments later her
black lacy garter belt and panties followed.  The panties floated to
the rug with a whisper, but the garter belt landed on a blade of the
ceiling fan and dangled provocatively.

Breathing hard, his hot gaze fastened on her, stretched out before him
on the exquisite oriental rug, he snatched off shoes and socks and
shucked out of his trousers and underwear with one mighty shove.

Then he was there with her, his big body stretching out over her, bare
flesh touching, feverish and delicious.  Their mouths met in a searing
kiss.  Caroline made a frantic sound and coiled her arms around his
neck.  Their bodies strained together, unable to get close enough, both
wanting, seeking, needing more.  There was a wild hunger raging in both
of them, wanton and out of control.

They touched and kissed and stroked until they couldn't stand it a
moment longer.  "Ah, sweetheart, you drive me crazy," Jack declared in
a shaken voice as tremors racked his body.  He raised himself partway
and looked at her flushed face, his eyes blazing.  "T11 me you want me.
Tell me."

Clutching him, her nails digging into his taut flesh, Caroline sobbed,
"Yes.  Yes.  I want you.  Please, Jack!  Hurry!"

Responding instantly to the frantic plea, Jack took her with wild
abandon.  He thrust deep, loving her with a ferocity and power that
bordered on desperation, and Caroline responded with all the pent-up
need and longing that had eaten at her for the past six lonely weeks,
matching his boldness and driving their passions higher and higher,
until they were spinning out of control.

"Jack!  Oh, Jack!"

He raised himself over her on stiffened arms.  His eyes locked with
hers.  "Could you give up this?"  he growled as he drove her to the
brink.

Caroline made a desperate sound and pleaded with him with her eyes,
with her body, but he held back.  "Could you, Caro?  Tell me."  "No!
No!  Oh, Jack, please!"

Jack smiled, a hard, satisfied smile, and took her with him into sweet
oblivion.

A short while later, as their racing hearts slowed and their breathing
returned to normal, Jack lifted up on his forearms, taking most of his
weight from her body.  He cupped her face between his palms and studied
her.  "You did mean it, didn't you?"  he asked, needing desperately to
hear her say it again.

Her heavy eyelids lifted.  She looked at him for so long, Jack's heart
began to thud again.  Then she raised one hand and pushed the dangling
curl off his forehead, smiling a little wistfully.  "Yes.  I mean it,
Jack," She said quietly.

Jack watched her closely, his chest tight.  The admission pleased him
immensely, but the aura of sadness and defeat that surrounded her made
him uneasy.

Chapter Five

g g Well, well, look who's here," Louise said.

Caroline looked up from the stack of invoices she was checking and was
surprised to see Jack striding across the showroom toward her.  Dressed
in a dark blue suit, crisp white shirt and a blue-and-magenta tie he
was so ruggedly handsome he took her breath away.

"Well, hi.  What are you doing here?"

"Can't I stop by to see my lady if I want to?"  Before she could answer
he came around her desk, put a hand under her chin and raised her face
for a long and thorough kiss.

With exquisite delicacy, his mouth rocked over hers, lingering like a
gourmet savoring a particularly fine dish.  Slowly his lips plucked at
hers, rubbed, pressed.  His tongue teased with tiny forays and
butterfly touches.  The moist warmth of his breath skated over her
cheek in little gusts as their breathing picked up speed.

Through it all Caroline gripped the edge of her desk with both hands,
so tight her fingers whitened.  He was touching her with only those
wonderful, wicked lips, but that slight contact sent fire streaking
through her.

The outdoorsy smell of his masculine after-shave blended with that
scent that was solely Jack, and the combination was devastating.  He
tasted of peppermint and coffee, a combination to which Caroline had
grown accustomed over the years.  Jack had a weakness for both.

When at last he raised his head his blue eyes were hot and his smile
was a seduction in itself.

"It's about time you two came up for air," Louise grumbled.  "I thought
I was going to have to throw cold water on you."

Neither of them paid the slightest attention to her.  Caroline sat
slumped in her chair, weak as a kitten.  She lifted her heavy eyelids
and met his seductive gaze and smiled.  "That was nice."  She ran the
tip of her tongue over her lips and twinkled up at him.  "Hmm,
peppermint."

He smiled and kissed the end of her nose before straightening.  "Now
that's what I like," he murmured.  "That well-loved look."

"Would you two kindly remember that this is a place of business,"
Louise grumbled, tongue in cheek.

Jack looked at her and winked.  "Don't worry, I don't have time for
anything serious.  I've got an appointment in twenty minutes.  I just
stopped by to see if Caroline would like to go out to dinner tonight. I
thought we'd try that new place on Westheimer.  I hear they've got
great food and a pretty good combo

for dancing."  He raised his eyebrows and looked at her warmly.  "How
about it, sweetheart?"

"It sounds lovely, but ... would you mind very much if we skipped it
tonight?  I'm just not up to it.  Maybe we could just order in."

"Are you still feeling under the weather?"

"No.  I'm just terribly tired.  I want to go home, have a long hot
soak, maybe some Chinese food and sleep for about twelve hours."

Jack searched her face, a frown creasing his brow.  "Are you sure?  You
look pale, and you've been feeling below par for over a week now. Maybe
you should go to the doctor and get a checkup.  Could be you're anemic
or something."

"Nonsense, I'm fine.  Just a little tired is all.  All I need is
rest."

He didn't look convinced, but after searching her face one more time he
nodded.  "Okay.  But I'm giving you fair warning, if this keeps up, I'm
taking you to the doctor myself.  And I'm sitting in on the diagnosis,
too, so don't think you can pull the wool over my eyes."

"All right, all right," she said, laughing.  "Since I'm certain I'll
feel better after I've had some rest I'll agree to those terms.  Now
shoo.  Go to your appointment, before you're late."

He bent and kissed her again.  "I'll pick up the food on the way home.
See you tonight, sweetheart."

"So.  The honeymoon is still going on," Louise drawled when he had
gone.

Caroline smiled and glanced at the bouquet of flowers on her desk. Jack
had sent them the day he-fore for no reason at all except, according to
the card that came with the bouquet, to say that he loved her.  "Yes. 
It appears so."

"I'll say one thing, when you flew the coop you woke that man up good.
Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea after all."

"Except that wasn't why I did it."

"Who cares, when you're getting these results?  Hmm.  I wonder if it
would work with Roger?"  Louise appeared to consider the idea, then
shook her head.  "Naw.  If I left him alone with the kids there
wouldn't be a stick of my house left standing after six weeks."

Caroline laughed.  "Why would you bother?  Roger's crazy about you and
you know it.  I'll bet he makes plenty of romantic gestures."

The comment was mainly to bolster Louise.  Personally, Caroline could
not picture her partner's ex-pro linebacker husband sending her flowers
on an impulse or bringing her coffee to bed or taking her dancing at a
romantic little bistro.  Roger was a nice guy, but suave sophistication
and finesse weren't exactly his style.

"Oh, yeah, like taking out the garbage and bathing the kids when I come
home bushed."  Louise's

expression turned thoughtful.  "You know, come to think of it, that is
pretty romantic."  A wicked gleam entered her eyes.  "I think I'll go
home tonight and seduce the big lug."

Caroline chuckled, and went back to checking in-voices--at least she
tried.  She had barely gotten started when Louise came over and stood
beside her desk.  Caroline looked up and found her studying her
intently.  "What?  Do I have dirt on my face, or something?"

"No.  I was just wondering.  Are you happy with your life, Caro?"

The question caught her by surprise.  For an instant, she was tempted
to pretend, but this was her dearest friend and confidante.  This was
the woman who listened to her troubles and shared her joys and was
always there when she needed her.  Louise deserved the truth.

Caroline's shoulders slumped and a fluttery smile wavered around her
lips.  She looked at Louise with sad eyes, then looked away into the
distance.

"As happy as I can be, I suppose.  In some ways I'm very happy."  Her
gaze strayed to the bouquet on the corner of her desk again, and she
smiled wist fully.

In the six weeks since Jack's return from Germany their lives had
settled back into the old routine, only now, to his credit, he was
doing everything in his power to make up for his previous neglect and
show her how much he cared.  He was constantly surprising her with
flowers and little gifts and thoughtful gestures.

There had been romantic, candlelit dinners on their terrace, cozy
Sunday mornings cuddled together reading the papers, weekends on the
cabin cruiser.  Their lovemaking, always deeply satisfying, was
steamier than ever.  Except for the dull knot of sadness that seemed to
be permanently lodged in her chest, she was happy.

"Jack showers me with love and attention and gifts, and he spends as
much time with me as he can.  I have to admit, I adore that.  And I
adore sharing my life with him.  But..."

"But you still want babies and marriage, right?"  Caroline's smile was
wan.  "I guess I'm just greedy.  Anyway, I have to accept that it's
just not going to happen.  I can't give up Jack.  I tried, but I just
can't.  I love him too much."

"Of course you can't give him up.  You two were meant for each other.
Any fool can see that.  I swear, I could just thump that hardheaded
Jack Riley."

That roused a weak chuckle out of Caroline.  "I'd let you if I thought
it would help.  I've tried talking to him, but he won't budge.  I've
finally given up."  "Can you live with that?"

"I don't seem to have any choice."

"Hmm."  Louise was quiet for a moment, then she asked, "What's this
about you feeling poorly?  You never mentioned that to me."

"It's nothing.  Don't pay any attention to Jack.  He's being a
worrywart.  I'm just feeling a little tired and washed out lately is
all.  It'll pass."

"Hmm.  You do look kinda peaked."  Louise's eyes narrowed, and she
studied Caroline intently.  "Tell me, do you want to sleep a lot?"

"Constantly."

"Uh-huh.  And are you emotional?  Do you get teary for no reason?"

"How did you know that?"

"Are your breasts tender?"

"Are they?"

"Well... yes, a little, I guess."

"How about morning sickness?  Has that started yet?"

"Morning sickness?  Why would I have mor--" Caroline's eyes widened.
"Oh, no.  You don't mean--It can't he-- There was just that one time
when I was unprotected."

"Honey, where were you during junior high school sex education class?
One time is all it takes."

"No.  No, I don't believe it.  It would he just too bizarre.  And
unfair to Jack."  She put her hand over her mouth, her eyes going wider
still.  "Oh, my Lord.  Jack.  He would be livid."  Caroline shook her
head vigorously.  "No.  I am definitely not pregnant.  I can't be
pregnant."

The next morning, the instant she sat up on the side of the bed, the
nausea hit her.  There was no time to control it or even to respond to
Jack's throaty "Good morning" as he leaned over in the bed and nuzzled
her neck from behind.  Her eyes widened, and with a moan she shot off
the bed and raced for the bathroom with her hand over her mouth.

"What the hell?"  she heard Jack growl behind her, but she hadn't time
for an explanation.  She barely made it as it was.

Seconds later he came tearing into the bathroom and found her on her
knees with her head hung over the toilet bowl, retching.

"All right.  That's it.  I'm taking you to a doctor," he declared as he
stepped closer and held her head for her.

"Nooo, I don't need a doctor," Caroline groaned, but the protest had
barely left her lips when another powerful wave of sickness rolled over
her, and she began to heave again.

When she was finally done she was as weak and limp as the wet doth Jack
used to wash her face, but even as he lifted her from the floor and led
her back to the bed she argued.  "I'm fine, Jack.  Really.  It was
probably just the Chinese food."

"Uh-huh.  Then why am I not sick?  Now you just lie there and rest
while I call the doctor's office.  Then I'll be right back and help you
get dressed."

"No, Jack, don't," she protested weakly.  "I don't need to see a
doctor."

"Tough.  You're going.  We're going to find out 'what the hell is wrong
with you."

That was exactly what Caroline was afraid of.

Jack looked as if he had been turned to stone.  He stared at the doctor
across the wide desk, unblinking, every muscle in his body taut.
"Pregnant?"

"That's right.  Ms.  Smithson is approximately six weeks pregnant.  The
symptoms she's experiencing, while annoying and unpleasant, are not at
all unusual at this stage of her first trimester, I assure you.  The
nausea and the extreme fatigue will pass about the time she enters her
second trimester."

"Pregnant?"  Jack repeated as though he had not heard a word.  "She
can't be pregnant."

"I assure you, she is."

Caroline sat beside Jack, gripping the arms of her chair, her lips
folded together, watching him apprehensively.  Conflicting emotions
roiled through her as violently as the sickness had earlier.  How, she
won-ale red was it possible to feel so terrible and so happy all at the
same time?

On one level, she felt wretchedly guilty, though why she didn't know.
She'd tried to warn him that night he'd come storming into her
apartment and arrogantly set aside all her plans, but he had refused to
listen.

On another level, she was so thrilled and elated she wanted to shout.
She was going to have a baby.  Jack's baby.  She couldn't believe it!
It was what she wanted most in the world.  How could she not be
happy?

Jack was not.  That much was painfully obvious.  He sat in stony
silence while Dr.  Lawson gave Caroline instructions and brochures on
prenatal care and wrote out a prescription for vitamins.

Jack did not utter so much as a word until they were in the car,
driving home.  He wouldn't even look at her.  Miserable, Caroline
stared straight ahead, her hands clasped tightly in her lap.  She could
not think of a thing to say.

Neither could Jack.  He was too busy trying to come to terms with the
burst of elation and pride he'd experienced when Dr.  Lawson had
delivered his stunning piece of news.

It had caught him completely by surprise.  It wasn't logical.  Once
he'd gotten over his shock he'd finally chalked it up to nothing more
than a Primitive reaction designed into the male psyche to ensure the
continuation of the species, much the same as Caroline's ticking
biological clock.  Viewed in that light, he could understand it and
control it, which eased his mind somewhat.

That did not, however, solve the problem of Caro's condition.  He
glanced at her out of the corner of his eye.  She was tense and
apprehensive.  Probably wondering what he was going to do.

Hell, he didn't see that they had any choice.  He cleared his throat
and gripped the steering wheel

"We'll get married right away."

That snapped her head around.  He could feel her staring at him.

"Wh-what did you say?"

He glanced at her, and felt a stab of concern.  She looked so pale and
vulnerable.  Childbirth was difficult, sometimes even dangerous for
women Caroline's age.  "I'm assuming that you won't consider giving the
child up for adoption or having an abortion" '

"No!  Of course I won't!  I don't know how you can even ask such a
thing."

"I was just checking."  He would have been surprised if she had.  He
realized, with a rush of confusion, he would have been disappointed in
her also.  He hadn't wanted--didn't want--this baby, but it was his and
he would take care of it.  Jack Riley was not a man who shirked his
responsibilities.

"Well, I'm having this baby whether you like it or not ."  '

"If that's your decision, then for the child's sake, we'll get married
as soon as we can make the arrangements."

"We'll do no such thing."  She shot him an appalled look.  "I will not
trap you into marriage, Jack, and that's that."

"Dammit, Caroline, you're not trapping me.  You warned me that you
weren't protected, and I wouldn't listen.  Although, if you hadn't
pulled that dumb stunt of moving out to begin with, none of this would
have happened."

"It was not a dumb stunt.  It was a logical and well-thought-out
plan."

"Whatever.  The fact remains that I took a chance and lost."  His mouth
tightened, and so did his grip on the steering wheel.  "Now I'll just
have to pay the price."

"Well, thank you so much.  How charming," she snapped with searing
sarcasm.  "You can take your noble sacrifice and stuff it, Jack Riley.
The answer is no."

"No?  For God's sake, Caroline, you've been after me to marry you for
months.  And now you're saying no?"

"Because you're doing it for the wrong reasons.  I want to be your wife
and have your baby.  You don't want either of us, but you'll grit your
teeth and marry me because you feel responsible.  Well, forget it.  I
won't he anyone's obligation.  And I will not have my

child grow up knowing his father resents him.  You and I both know
what that feels like," she declared, and promptly burst into tears.

Jack was flabbergasted.  Caroline had never been a weepy woman.  Except
for a few sniffles during sappy movies, he couldn't remember ever
seeing her cry before, but she was bawling as if her heart was broken.
If he hadn't been on the damn freeway he would have pulled over
immediately and taken her into his arms.

"Take it easy, Caro.  Aw, c'mon, honey, don't cry like that.  Please.
You're going to make yourself sick again."

His pleas were useless.  He wasn't even sure she heard him.  Jack
checked the traffic in the mirrors, whipped the car through three lanes
of traffic, earning a chorus of horn blasts, and exited the freeway at
the next ramp.

He pulled into the parking area in front of a strip center on the
corner of the feeder street, zipped into a parking slot and switched
off the engine.  Quickly he unlatched both their seat belts and reached
for her.

"Don't!  Leave me alone!  I don't want you to touch me!"  Caro wailed,
slapping at his arms.  She was so upset she couldn't think.  She felt
raw and vulnerable and hurt and she hated it!  She hated Jack!

"Tough."  Hooking his hands under her arms he lifted her over the
Jaguar's console and dragged her onto his lap.

She twisted and pushed, but she was crying too hard to escape him. Jack
wrapped his arms around her and held her tight against his chest. After
a while Caroline gave up the fight and collapsed against him, her
fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt as another paroxysm of
weeping seized her.  She sobbed and hiccuped and her breath hitched
with each watery sniff.

"Take it easy, sweetheart," he crooned.  "Come on, now."  With a hand
on the back of her head, he cradled her face against the hollow of his
neck beneath his jaw and ran his other hand up and down her back, his
movements slow and hypnotic, his murmured words soothing.  After
several minutes she began to quiet, and she lay still against him
except for intermittent shudders, the ragged remnants of spent tears.

"Here."  Jack stuffed a snowy white handkerchief in her hand.  "Now
blow."

Caroline did, noisily.  She was in the middle of a particularly loud
honk when someone rapped on the driver's window at her back.  She
jumped and cut loose a choked scream.

"Take it easy, honey."  Jack's right arm tightened around her as he
pushed the button to roll down the window.  Caroline twisted around on
his lap and looked right into the bright blue eyes of a policeman.
"Yes, officer?"  "Everything okay here?"

"Everything's under control.  My wife's just upset, officer," Jack
said with a friendly smile.  "She's expecting, and she's a little
emotional."

"Is that right, ma'am?  This man's not abusing you, is he?  Or holding
you against your will?  I saw him jerk you out of your seat."

Caroline hastily wiped away her tears with her fingers even as her
cheeks flamed.  She shook her head.  "No, officer.  I'm fine.  Ju-just
a bit up-upset is all,"

she said over another ragged hitch of breath.  "You sure?"

She nodded.  "Ye-yes, sir."

He looked from her to Jack, then touched his forefinger to his hat.
"Okay, then.  Sorry I bothered you ."  '

"What did you tell him that for?"  Caroline demanded the instant the
policeman was out of ear shot.  "I'm not your wife."

"You soon will be."

"Jack, I told you, I'm not going to marry you just because I'm
pregnant."

"Can you think of a better reason?"

"Yes!  Love!"

"Dammir, Cato.  You know that I love you more than life itself.  And
don't you dare start crying again" he ordered with an edge of panic in
his voice when fresh tears filled her eyes.

She scrambled out of his lap and back into the passenger seat.  Her
chin still wobbled but she raised it and shot him a cold look.  "That's
not why you're insisting on marriage, though, is it?  Well just forget
it.  I can take care of my baby just fine without you."

"I'm sure you can, my sweet, but you're forgetting one thing--this is
my child, too.  I'm responsible for its conception and I'll be
responsible for its welfare once it arrives, and it's damned well going
to be born with my name."

"Oh."  She looked at him and chewed her lower lip.  She hadn't thought
about that aspect.  She mulled it over a moment, then nodded.  "All
right.  I'll marry you so the baby will have your name, but we'll live
apart."

"Wrong again.  We'll continue just as we are.  At least, until the.
baby gets here," he added with a grimace.

He started the Jaguar again, reversed out of the parking slot and
merged into the traffic headed south on Fannin.  "It's true, I don't
want this baby," he continued with his eyes on the streaming traffic.
"But there appears to be nothing I can do to prevent it from getting
here.  Its arrival is going to change our lives, and there's nothing I
can do about that, either, but I'll be damned if I'll let it rob me of
you."

"You don't have any say in the matter.  You can't make me stay with
you, Jack," she challenged bravely.  "And I won't raise a child in a
home where it isn't truly wanted and loved."

Jack listened to the edict with tight-jawed anger.  He turned his head
and jolted her with a sizzling look from those blue eyes.  "We'll
see."

Caroline did not give up.  Jack had known that she wouldn't.  When she
set her mind on something her tenacity was mind-boggling.  Over the
next several days he tried everything--reason, pleading, even
seduction-but she still insisted that they would have to part once the
baby got there.  Worried about upsetting her again, he didn't push. The
pregnancy had put Caroline's emotions on a permanent roller-coaster
ride, and her mood swings concerned him.

After one particularly bad bout with morning sickness, her emotions hit
a low ebb, and she suggested that it really would be best if she simply
moved out again and got out of his hair.  Jack's patience came to a
screeching halt.

"The hell you will!  You're staying right where you are where I can
look after you.  Furthermore, we are getting married immediately.  No
more delays."

He would not listen to any more of her foolish ar-gum eats

The wedding took place three days later, a brief, dismal affair in a
justice of the peace office, The only guests were Louise and Roger and
Caroline's farther and stepmother.

Caroline expected to feel different, to feel somehow like a married
woman, but the ceremony was over so quickly and was so impersonal, all
she felt was depressed.

Afterward they went to Vargo's for a champagne brunch, mainly for the
sake of her father and stepmother.  They were thrilled about the
marriage, although in an aside, her father had gently scolded her about
the hurried ceremony.

"Really, Caro, a justice of the peace?  I would have been happy to give
you a proper church wedding with all the trimmings.  You are my only
child after all."

"Don't fret, Dad.  This was fine."  She kissed his cheek.  "The
important thing is Jack and I are married, just as you've always
wanted."

He beamed.  "Yes, that's true.  I suppose I shouldn't complain."

Caroline felt guilty for misleading her father.  He thought his
daughter was at last settled into a marriage to last a lifetime.  She
didn't have the heart to tell him it was just a temporary
arrangement.

Caroline sat through the interminable brunch torn between nausea and
heartsickness.  Her father and stepmother were so happy.  Even Louise
and Roger seemed upbeat, though she'd explained the whole thing to her
partner.

When she'd told her that she and Jack would be parting after the baby's
birth, Louise had merely given her a long, pithy look and murmured,
"Oh, yeah, right," and went back to work, with what looked suspiciously
like a smug grin.

Finally the brunch was over and, after Caroline and Jack received
numerous hugs and kisses and congratulations, plus an unexpected
pelting of rice, they all went their separate ways.

Leaning her head back in the Jaguar's buttery leather seat, Caroline
closed her eyes and sighed.

"Thank goodness that's over."

"Tired?"

"Drained is a better word."

"Did you tell your father about the baby?"

"No, not yet.  There's plenty of time for that.  He was so happy, I saw
no point in ruining this day for him."

Rolling her head to the side, she opened her eyes and gazed at the
scenery whizzing by.  It took her a moment to realize that they weren't
heading back to the apartment.

She frowned and sat up straight.  "Where are you going?"

"To the airport."

"What for?"

"So we can catch a flight.  We're going on a honeymoon."

"What?  Jack, that's crazy.  The kind of wedding we had doesn't call
for a honeymoon.  I'd feel like a fraud.  Besides, I don't have any
clothes with me."

"Yeah, you do.  I packed your bags last night while you were sleeping
the sleep of the dead.  They're in the trunk.  And I checked with Dr.
Lawson.  He said there was no problem with you traveling.  In fact, he
thought some R and R would be good for you.  Louise assured me she
could take care of Ambience by herself for a few days."

She looked at him, shaking her head.  "You've gone to a lot of trouble
to arrange this.  Why?"

"Because we just got married.  Because you need to take a break and
rest.  Because it seemed appropriate.  Because I want to.  All of the
above.  And if you need any more convincing, think about long, lazy
days in crystal water and laying in the sun on a white sand beach.
Waiters plying us with Bloody Marys, in your case, Virgin Marys.  Room
service," he added in a seductive murmur.

Caroline groaned.  "You convinced me.  Where are we going?"

"Antigua.  Most beautiful beaches in the Caribbean."

Their hotel room turned out to be a small but luxurious cottage, one of
several tucked away among the tall palms and gardens adjacent to the
main hotel.

"This is gorgeous."  When the bellhop left, Caroline rushed to the
French doors and threw them wide.  From the private terrace she could
see lacy whitecaps lazily rolling in to the shore and the glowing moon
reflecting on the surface of the water.  The palm trees were undulating
purple shadows against a star-bright sky.  The waves swished against
the sand, and from

somewhere farther to the left by the main hotel, she heard the faint
strains of a steel drum band.

Coming to stand behind her, Jack slipped his arms around her waist and
nuzzled his jaw against her temple.  Caroline sighed and leaned back
against him, resting her forearms atop his, enjoying the slight scratch
of crisp suit sleeves against her skin.  Simply being close to Jack
gave her pleasure.

"There's chilled champagne waiting.  Nonalcoholic but it's the
symbolism that counts.  And I turned on the water in the bath."  He
bent his head and nibbled her ear.  "I got you a new nightgown and
negligee," he murmured, and she shivered as his hot breath filled her
ear.  "It's white satin and lace."  His teeth nipped.  "And very
sexy."

Caroline was both touched and saddened.  "Oh, Jack, that was sweet, but
you shouldn't have gone to so much trouble.  This is really more of a
vacation than a honeymoon."

Grasping her shoulders, he turned her slowly but firmly until she was
facing him.  His blue eyes glittered beneath half-closed lids and the
seductive curve of his mouth sent her heart cato ming He stroked his
fingertips up the side of her neck, making her tremble.  "You're wrong,
my darling," he said in a husky murmur as his gaze lowered to her
mouth.  His head tipped to one side and began a slow descent.

Caroline waited in trembling anticipation, her breathing shallow, her
skin tingling.  Her mouth parted slightly as his drew near, and as her
heavy eyelids drooped her breath came out on a sigh.

His mouth hovered a hairbreadth from hers.  The tip of his tongue
touched her lower lip, and a hard shudder rippled through her.  Her
breasts grew heavy.

His scent went to her head like fine wine, and she could feel his heat
all along the front of her body.  With a little moan, she tried to lean
closer, but his hands gripped her upper arms, holding her back.

"You're So very wrong," he whispered against her lips.  "This is
definitely a honeymoon."

Then, with skill and stunning passion, he proceeded to prove it to
her.

Chapter Six

For Caroline, the first three months of marriage passed in a blur of
retching and bone-weary lethargy.  The so-called morning sickness hit
her at all hours of the day and night and lasted well into her second
trimester When she wasn't hanging over the toilet bowl all she wanted
to do was sleep.  She could barely manage to drag herself to the studio
every day, but she did.  Even at that, though she tried to keep up with
her share of the work, most of the load fell on Louise's shoulders.

Caroline felt terrible about that, but whenever she mentioned it or
tried to apologize, Louise cut her off bruskly.

"Nonsense.  That's what friends are for.  Partners, too, for that
matter.  Besides, you did the same for me twice in the last ten
years."

"Yeah, but I don't remember you ever being this sick or draggy,"
Caroline moaned.  "Most of the time I'm almost comatose.  I'm almost no
help to you at all."

Louise laughed.  "Your own pregnancies always seem worse than anyone
else's, but believe me, I went through pretty much the same thing. Just
keep reminding yourself that it will soon be over."

Caroline groaned and put her head down on her desk.  "I feel like I've
already been pregnant a year."  If Jack had had his way, Caroline would
not have gone to work at all.  He was appalled by the relentless
nausea, sure that no one could be that ill for that long without
something being terribly wrong, and the acute lethargy worried him
almost as much.  He watched her like a hawk and called Dr.  Lawson if
she so much as coughed.  He nearly drove her crazy with his fretting.

For the first time in all the years that Caroline had known him he did
his best to avoid making business trips, sending underlings on his
staff whenever he could.

Though Jack's insistence that she stay in bed held great appeal in her
listless state, Caroline would not hear of letting Louise carry the
load alone.  As a compromise, Jack set up a day bed in the storeroom at
Ambience and made Louise promise that she would see to it that Caroline
took at least one nap every day.

By the time Caroline was into her fourth month her waist had thickened
but her tummy had only a slight pouch.  However, her breasts had
increased two cup sizes and were ultra sensitive changes which Jack
found endlessly fascinating.

Jack was a lusty man with a healthy sexual appetite, but during the
first few months when she was so dreadfully ill he did nothing more
than hold her in his arms while she slept.  Once the sickness eased off
and

her body began to change, he made love to her very gently, being
careful of her, restraining his power and natural drive.  He worried
about hurting her and treated, her as though she were made of delicate
crystal.

Caroline loved the tenderness, but she missed his vigorous and earthy
lovemaking, and for that reason she was at times anxious for the baby
to arrive... until she remembered that once it had, unless a miracle
occurred, she and Jack would go their separate ways.

Whenever she tried to bring up the subject of their parting after the
baby's birth, he changed the subject or refused to discuss it, but they
both knew he was merely putting off the inevitable.

Jack had been wonderful through the whole affair, looking after her,
humoring her through her mood swings and caring for her through the
awful sickness.  He was a man of integrity and he was determined to do
the right thing by her and the baby, but she knew, if he could wave a
magic wand and put things back the way they had been he would in a
heartbeat.

That saddened her, but she understood.  He had not wanted to become a
husband and father, and she was not about to shackle him to a
life-style he detested.  More importantly, she would not raise her
child in a home where it was not totally and unconditionally loved and
wanted by both parents.

At five months Caroline's belly had a definite ripe roundness, and by
the time she was six months along, she was bemoaning her shape.

"I look like a basketball with legs," she groaned, looking at herself
in a three-way mirror as she and Louise were shopping for maternity
clothes one evening after work.  "I was doing fine, then all the sudden
I ballooned.  I've gained thirteen pounds just since Jack left three
weeks ago.  I can't even see my feet anymore!"

"It goes with the territory, kiddo," Louise said heartlessly.  "I hate
to tell you this, but it's going to get worse before it gets better."

"Oh, thanks loads.  Already my back aches, my legs ache, my ankles
swell.  Shaving my legs and putting on panty hose are major ordeals,
both of which involve unbelievable contortions.  Everything I eat gives
me heartburn, and to top it all off, I feel like someone parked a truck
on my bladder.  And you tell me it's going to get worse?"

"Uh-huh.  Pretty soon you'll move on to feeling like a beached whale.
You'll waddle like a duck, and by the end of the day your feet will be
so swollen your toes will look like little sausages.  Then there are
broken veins and stretch marks and--"

"Oh, stop.  Stop!  I get the picture.  I don't want to, but I get
it."

Louise laughed.  "You know what they say, "Be careful what you wish for
because you might get it."

Well, you wanted a baby, and this is the price you pay, my friend. But
don't worry, I promise you it will all be worth it once you have your
baby in your arms."

"I mow.  That's the only thing that keeps me going.  But in the
meantime I look like a blimp."

"So what's your problem?  Jack doesn't seem to mind ."  '

"Jack hasn't seen me looking like this.  He's going to be shocked at
what a difference a few weeks can make."  '

"Hmm.  When's he due back?"

"In about a week."  Caroline turned sideways and looked at her
burgeoning shape in the mirror.  She rolled her eyes.  "God alone knows
what I'll look like by then."

The elevator stopped on the ninth floor, and Jack hefted his cases and
stepped out, weary but relieved to be home.  It had been a hellacious
flight.  What should have taken three hours had taken almost ten,
thanks to a four-hour delay, a missed connection and turbulent weather.
To top it off, an obnoxious drunk for a seatmate had made the last leg
of the journey seem twice as long as it actually was.

An appropriate ending, he supposed, for what had been an even more
hellacious business trip.

Of course, that was his own fault.  He had worked his buns off, and
those of the entire Detroit office staff, in order to cram four weeks
of work into three.

In the future they would all probably run for cover whenever they saw
him coming.

Jack's mouth twisted wryly as he set one suitcase down and fished into
his trouser pocket for his key.  He'd done it to get back to Caroline
quicker.  He unlocked the door, picked up his case again and stepped
inside, shouldering the door shut behind him.  He stopped in the
entryway and breathed a sigh of relief.  Home at last.

He had never liked being away from Caroline, but he liked his job, and
travel was an important part of it, so he'd accepted the separations as
necessary and endured them by burying himself in the work.

That, however, was before she became pregnant with his child.  Now he
worried about her too much.  What if there were complications?  What if
she had trouble while he was gone?  What if she fainted?  What if she
hurt herself?  The anxiety was just too much.  Which was why he'd
already told his boss at Tilson and Dodd Engineering that he would not
make any more trips over the next three months.  If something came up,
they'd just have to send someone else.  He wasn't budging from Houston
until Caroline had the baby.

The lights were on in the living room but there was no sign of Caroline
when he peeked in.  Down at the far end of the hall he could see light
spilling from their bedroom as well, and he heard faint sounds of
Caro

moving around.  And apparently, grumbling to herself.  Grinning, he
headed that way.

As he reached the door he opened his mouth to call out a greeting, but
the words died in his throat when he spotted her.  She was standing in
front of the full-length cheval mirror wearing only a pair of practical
white knit panties with an elastic maternity panel in the front and a
white cotton maternity bra.

A sweet pressure filled his chest.  Damn, it was wonderful to see her.
He never felt truly comfortable without her.

He studied her with a bemused expression.  As he had been leaving the
Detroit offices, one of the engineers who had met Caroline called out
to him to give his best to his wife, and the statement had jolted him.
Watching Caroline, Jack smiled wryly.  His wife.  He still hadn't
gotten used to thinking of Caroline as that, but he had to admit it had
a possessive ring to it that he liked.

He watched her pick up a dress from the pile of clothes on the chair
and toss it over her head.  From the size of the pile, Jack gathered
that she had been shopping.  She turned this way and that, checking out
how she looked in the voluminous dress and frowning.

"Blimp," she.  muttered and Jack's lips twitched.  She whipped the
garment off over her head and reached for another one.  For a few
seconds she stood again in only her panties and bra, and when she
caught sight of her reflection she turned sideways to check her shape
and immediately made a face.  "Oh, yeah.  Definitely a beached
whale."

Another grin started, but Jack's amusement evaporated when he got a
good look at her in profile.  He stared, amazed.  The little pumpkin
tummy she'd had when he left three weeks ago was now the size of a
bushel basket.  Good Lord, she had almost three months to go!  If she
kept expanding at this rate she'd pop!

He stared at her for a long time as she exchanged one garment for
another, that familiar confusion tightening his chest.  It was strange.
He had fully expected to have to grit his teeth and endure Caroline's
pregnancy.  He'd even expected he would have to fight feelings of
resentment and had been braced for it.  Instead he found that he was
becoming totally involved in her pregnancy and enthralled by the whole
process.

For months he'd held her head and wiped her face while she was sick.
Nowadays he massaged away her leg cramps, dealt with her erratic mood
swings, cajoling her whenever she was blue and consoling her through
irrational bouts of crying, laughing with her when she was on top of
the world.

His mouth twisted when he recalled how, with rueful humor, he had
dutifully trudged out in the small hours of the morning for weird food
when she was craving, hauled her out of chairs when she couldn't

struggle out on her own and out of bed when the pressure on her
bladder forced her to visit the bathroom several times each night.

And through it all, that tiny flare of pride he'd experienced on
learning of the baby stubbornly hung on, resisting his efforts to snuff
it out.

It was stupid.  Why should he feel proud just because he'd managed to
impregnate a woman?  It wasn't as though he'd accomplished anything
truly unique or performed any sort of spectacular feat or worked a
miracle.  His part in the whole thing had amounted to a few moments of
intense pleasure.  Big deal.

It was foolish to let yourself get caught up in the romanticism of
impending parenthood.  Realistically the child was a responsibility,
and that's how he was determined to think of it.  After all, he hadn't
wanted this baby.  He still didn't.  He'd liked the life he and
Caroline had just fine and had no desire to change a single thing about
it.  Certainly not to bring a third person into it.

That was what he'd always felt as a child--odd man out.

From the time he had hit puberty and learned where babies came from he
had known that he did not want children.  They were a nuisance and a
burden--that was the message he'd gotten, loud and clear, from both his
parents and a string of stepparents.

Which had caused him to wonder why anyone voluntarily saddled
themselves with offspring.

However, like it or not, a child was on the way.  Caroline, with her
usual determination and tenacity, had dug in her heels; she wanted this
baby, and he either went along with that decision or he lost her.

Jack shuddered.  The mere thought put an icy knot of fear in his gut.
He'd as soon cut out his heart with a dull knife.

As yet, he didn't know how he was going to handle being a father.
Caroline was right.  Children deserved to be loved and wanted.
Intellectually he knew that.  Hell, hadn't he longed for those very
things as a kid?  But he just couldn't seem to muster those feelings.

In that respect, Jack feared he was very much like his old man--closed
off, remote, self-involved--which was what he'd always worded about,
and was the main reason he hadn't wanted to stick any kid with himself
as a father.

Oh sure, he was fascinated by the physical changes in his wife's body
and the baby's rapid development but that was simply natural curiosity.
He certainly didn't have any particular paternal feelings.

He'd have to muddle through somehow, though, or he'd lose Caroline.

She had declared her intention to leave him after the baby was born in
a moment of extreme emotion, and at first he'd dismissed it.  Now he
wasn't so sure.  Caroline had tried to broach the subject several
times,

but so far he'd managed to avoid that conversation, but the threat was
always there, hovering between them.

She was so wrapped up in this baby and so intent on doing the right
thing for it, she just might cut him out of her life, even though he
knew damn well that would hurt her as much as it would hurt him.  Hurt,
hell, it would kill him.

Before he'd let that happen, he'd grit his teeth and bear anything,
including marriage and parenthood.  Caroline would just have to provide
the kid with enough love for both of them because he wasn't letting her
go.

Caroline stripped off another tent-type dress, and the muffled sounds
coming from the folds of cloth as she dragged the garment over her head
sounded amazingly like "hippopotamus in a muumuu."  She slung the dress
down in disgust, but when she started to reach for another she stopped
suddenly and placed both hands on her swollen abdomen, a startled look
on her face.

Jack stiffened and snapped out, "What is it?  What's wrong, Caro?"

Caroline jumped as though he'd tossed a lit firecracker into the room.
"Jack!  You scared me half to death!  What are you doing here?  You
weren't due back until next week."

Ignoring her questions, he strode across the room with a long
purposeful stride, his gaze fixed on the hands splayed across her
belly.  "What's wrong?"  he demanded again.

"Wrong?"

"You stopped suddenly and grabbed your belly."  "Oh, that."  She
chuckled and looked down at the turgid mound.  When her eyes met his
again they were soft with wonder.  "I just felt him kick."

Jack stopped cold, his expression a mix of horror, surprise and
curiosity.  "Really?  You mean a real kick?"

She had been feeling slight movements before he left for Detroit, but
those had been merely vague flutters.

"Uh-huh.  Pro punter class.  Oh, my.  There he goes again ."  '

As though in a daze, Jack stepped close and laid his hand on her
distended abdomen.  Caroline moved it a few inches and held it there.
For a second there was nothing, then a definite thump against his
palm.

Jack's eyes widened and his gaze met Caroline's.  "Good God!  Doesn't
that hurt?"

"No," she said with a laugh.  "It jUSt.  feels... peculiar."  Her smile
was radiant and her eyes shone with such indescribable joy, Jack felt
it like a punch in the gut.  In that moment, for the very first time,
he began to realize just how much having this baby meant to Caroline.

She looked as though someone had just given her a slice of heaven. This
wasn't just a vague, biological

urge or a whim.  This was vital.  This was her heart's desire.

Which was what she'd been trying to tell you all along dumb ass.  It
made him feel slightly sick to think that he had tried to deny her
this.

The baby kicked against his hand again, three times in rapid
succession, and Jack caught his breath.  He met Caroline's look of
dreamy happiness and smiled.  "Lie down," he whispered.

"Jack, really, it doesn't hurt.  Honest.  Anyway, just let me put on my
robe."  She reached for the wrap as she spoke.

"No.  I want to look at you," he said in a seductive voice, pushing it
out of reach as he eased her onto the bed.

"Oh, but, Jack--" She tried to cover her abdomen with her arms, but
that was a futile effort.

"What's the matter with you, Cato?  Don't tell me you're shy?  With
me?"  Her pained expression gave him his answer.  He stared at her,
astonished.  Then he burst out laughing.  He couldn't help it.  "Hell,
honey, I've seen, touched and kissed every square inch of your
delectable little body."

"It's not so little anymore," she muttered unhappily, trying to drag
the corner of the bedspread over herself.

"Ah, so that's the problem," Jack said with a sage nod, trying to pry
the bed cover out of her hands.

"Jack, stop it.  I've gotten as big as a house, and I don't want you to
see.  Jack!  Give me that!"  she wailed.

"Shh.  I want to look."  Tossing the spread aside, he raised up on one
elbow and gazed intently at the protruding mound of her stomach.  He
ran his hand over it, marveling at how firm and taut it was, how warm.
Not satisfied, he hooked his fingers under the elastic and started to
push the parities down.  Caroline grabbed his hand.

"Jack, no!"

"Caro, don't be silly.  This is me remember."  He grinned.  "Your
husband.  We don't have any secrets from each other."

"But--"

"Shh."  Ignoring her moan, he slipped the panties down until they
cupped under her abdomen.  Jack went utterly still and stared. Caroline
closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip to still its quivering.

Jack felt as though a giant hand were squeezing his heart.  He had
never had anything affect him so profoundly as the sight of her belly
swollen with his child.

Tentatively he put out his hand and laid it on that milky white swell,
and a tremor rippled through him.  The taut skin was so warm, and as
smooth as silk.  His hand glided slowly, almost reverently over her,
and the sight of his dark hand, with its sprinkling of black hairs on
the back against the silvery sheen of her stretched skin was incredibly
erotic.

A welter of emotions swirled within Jack--pride... foolish, maybe, but
still there--amazement,

pleasure, fear... and hot, greedy lust.  "Beautiful," he murmured.

Caroline's eyelids lifted a fraction, and she looked at him
suspiciously through narrow slits.  "I'm as big as a house and ugly."

"No.  You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

"You're just saying that to make me feel better."  He had to smile at
her sulky tone.  He started to re-lute the statement but that pouty
mouth begged to be kissed, so he obliged.

Caroline responded with a sigh and slid her hand around his neck, her
fingers spearing into the short hairs at his nape as her soft lips
parted for him.  As usual, the kiss set off a fire storm of desire
sizzling between them.

When Jack ended the kiss he looked down into her glazed eyes.  "I said
it because it's true.  You're gorgeous."  '

"I'm a big, shapeless, sexless blob.  It probably disgusts you to look
at me."

"Are you kidding?"  He took her hand and pressed it against him.  "Does
that feel like I'm disgusted?"  Shock widened her eyes.  "Jack!"

"A sexless blob?  Hardly."  He ran his hand over her again.  "Honey,
your ripe little body is the most erotic thing I've ever seen.  Just
looking at you gets me all hot and bothered."

"Oh, Jack, do you mean that?"

"Oh, yeah.  I mean it.  Lift up a second."  She obeyed automatically,
and in a deft move, he slipped her parities down her legs and off.  He
unhooked the front closure on her bra and spread the cups wide, and her
engorged breasts spilled into his waiting hands.

His smile was devilish, but his eyes burned with passion.  He bent his
head and lathed each pouting nipple with his tongue, raking it across
the sensitive tips until she arched her back and cried out.  Then he
kissed her neck, her swollen belly, and ran his tongue down the silky
line at the juncture of her thigh.

Caroline moaned and writhed, her head thrashing against the pillow.
When she was almost out of her head with wanting, Jack sat up and
quickly removed his clothes.

Then he stretched out again and moved between her thighs.  He paused
over her, his face rigid with desire.  "Lord, I want you," he growled,
and entered her with a slow, silken thrust that wrung a cry from
Caroline.

Chapter Seven

Jack took his eyes off the rain-slick street just long enough to glance
at Caroline.  "You doing okay?  The evening didn't tire you too much,
did it?  I know the Bainbridges are a dull couple, but he's an
important client."

She smiled softly.  "I'm fine."

"You sure?  I hate to subject you to these boring business dinners, but
I'm just not comfortable leaving you alone when your due date is only a
month away."

"Don't worry about it.  I'm perfectly happy."

A tiny smile tugged at Jack's mouth.  That was the God's truth.
Caroline radiated happiness.  She had ever since she emerged from those
first few months of sickness.  It shined from her eyes.  It was in her
laughter, her smile, in every small graceful movement and look.  Seeing
that inner joy left no doubt of how much having a child meant to her.

The changes in Caroline, physical and emotional, amazed and fascinated
him.  In the last month, she had bloomed A peacefulness had settled
over her, a Madonna-like serenity that gave her an ethereal glow.  Her
beauty had always beguiled him, but now she took his breath away.

Far from being turned off by her ripening figure, which, to be honest,
was what he had expected, he found it highly erotic.

Jack gave a little snort.  For all the good that did him.  Now that she
was in her ninth month, lovemaking was no longer advisable.  However,
her burgeoning figure fascinated him in other ways, as well.  Whenever
he felt the baby move inside her he experienced a welter of strange,
new feelings, so acute and overwhelming they were almost painful.

Frowning into the rain-dark night, he took his foot off the brake and
stepped on the gas as the traffic light up ahead turned green.  So far
he hadn't analyzed those feelings too closely.  He wasn't rare he
wanted to know what they meant.

They were halfway through the intersection when the screech of tires
interrupted his thoughts.

"Dammit!"  Jack did not have time to do anything other than grip the
steering wheel tighter.  The jarring impact knocked them to the side
against their seat belts.  Accompanying the crash was a loud bang,
followed instantly by the sound of breaking glass and crumpling metal
and Caroline's high-pitched scream.

Jack fought for control, but the Jaguar He wed around on the slick
street and went skidding, doing slow revolutions as it glided toward
the curb as though it were floating.

There was more rending metal and shattering glass as the rear of the
Jag on Caroline's side clipped a

parked car and sent them spiraling out into the street again, and more
squealing tires as oncoming traffic slammed on brakes and struggled to
miss them.

They finally came to a stop, facing in the wrong direction, when they
slid into a curb almost a block from where they were hit.

There was a moment of magnified silence as Jack, still gripping the
steering wheel tightly, tried to orient himself.  Then his gaze jerked
to Caroline, and fear shot through him.

Blood ran down her face from a cut just below her hairline and her skin
was parchment white.  But it was the way she clutched her abdomen with
both hands that sent ice shooting through his veins.

"Carol Oh, God, darling, are you hurt?"

She turned her head and looked at him, her face contorted with
excruciating pain, her eyes filled with horror.  "The baby," she
gasped.  "Jack, help me!  I'm losing my baby!"

The ride in the ambulance to the hospital seemed interminable.  By the
time they arrived Caroline was in so much pain and so frightened that
Jack was nearly out of his mind with worry and was ready to let fly at
someone--anyone.

Dr.  Lawson had been notified of the accident as soon as the call for
the ambulance had gone in, and he was waiting at the emergency room
entrance along with the trauma team of nurses and doctors.  The minute
Jack spotted the obstetrician he began a combination of autocratic
orders and abject begging.

"You will save them, doctor.  Do you understand me?  You will damn well
save both of them.  You got that?"  He ran alongside the gurney,
holding Caroline's icy hand as the team of nurses and doctors pushed it
at a run.  Dr.  Lawson was so busy trying to evaluate his patient he
was hardly aware of Jack's rantings.

"Do you hear me?  Dammit, I can't lose them!  Oh, God, please don't let
me lose either of them.  Please."

"Come, Mr.  Riley, you can't go in there."  His upper arms were grabbed
and he was jerked away from the gurney.  "Why don't you come along with
me, and we'll get your wife admitted."

"Let me go!"  He stared as Caroline was wheeled away through a set of
double doors.  "I've got to be with my wife!  Let go, dammit!"

"I'm sorry, Mr.  Riley, but no one is allowed in surgery but the
doctors and nurses.  As soon as we fill out all the necessary forms,
you can come back here.  There's a nice waiting room right through
those door."

Jack stood in the middle of the hall and stared at the still-swinging
double doors.  "Oh, God."

An hour later he sat on a bench inside the surgery waiting room.
Leaning forward with his elbows resting on his knees, his hands were
clasped together in a

fisted prayer.  Please, God, let them be all right.  Please.

In that horrible first instant, when he'd realized that he' might lose
not only Caroline, but their child, as well, it had hit him like a fist
to the heart that he wanted the baby desperately.  He loved Caroline
with all his heart and soul, and the child she was carrying was the
product of their love, a blending of the two of them, and he loved the
unborn baby as much as he loved his wife.  If they lost it, the blow
would be devastating-to Caroline and to him.

"Take it easy, Jack.  You've got to have faith."  Louise sat down
beside him and put her arm around his shoulder.  He barely remembered
calling her, but he must have, because she had come bustling into the
waiting room barely thirty minutes after they had wheeled Caroline
away.

"It was my fault.  I should have been more careful.  I should have seen
the guy coming and avoided him somehow.,

"Jack, the guy ran a red light going fifteen miles an hour over the
speed limit on a wet street.  There was no way you could have avoided
him.  So would you please quit torturing yourself?"

"Maybe if--"

He broke off and lurched to his feet when Dr.  Lawson appeared in the
doorway.  "How is she?  How's the baby?  Will they be all right?"

"Calm down, Jack.  Other than a few stitches and a slight concussion,
your wife is fine."

"And the baby?  Is it... ?"

"Alive?  You bet.  We tried to stop the labor, but we couldn't.  About
ten minutes ago your wife gave birth to a healthy, beautiful six-pound
girl."

Jack stared at the doctor and swallowed hard.  "A girl?"  he croaked,
and swallowed again.  "A girl!  Did you hear that, Louise?  Caroline
and I have a daughter!"

"I heard," Louise said, smiling indulgently.

Jack got his first look at his daughter a half hour later when he was
finally allowed into his wife's room.  Caroline was propped up in the
bed, looking down at the tiny pink-and-white infant cradled in her
arms.  His breath caught at the sight.  She looked like a
breathtakingly beautiful Madonna, her face aglow with love.

Standing quietly in the doorway, Jack watched her.  He was gripped with
an emotion so strong it was almost suffocating.  His wife and
daughter.

Caroline's soft expression held him entranced, and he stared at her,
marveling at the tenderness that radiated from her, the inner glow that
lit her face.  She was the essence of womanhood.  Feminine.  Maternal.
Loving.  Jack knew that for as long as he lived he would remember this
moment.

An aching tightness squeezed his throat, and he swallowed hard.  Never
taking his eyes from her, he walked into the room.  "Do you have any
idea how lovely you look?"  he asked quietly, and Caroline looked up
with a joyous smile.

"Oh, Jack, come see her.  She's so precious."  Jack stopped beside the
bed, and as he gazed at his daughter for the first time he felt as
though someone had tied a 'half hitch around his heart.  Love came
gushing up from the center of his soul, swelling his chest until he
could barely breathe.  Then this was why, no matter how dismal and
insane the world got, generation after generation, people had children,
this sweet, painful, overwhelming feeling of love and hope.

"She's beautiful"' he said around the lump in his throat and touched
the baby's downy head.

"Oh, Jack, do you really think so?"

The anxiety in her voice almost made him wince.  He dragged his gaze
from his infant daughter and looked at his wife.  "She's gorgeous," he
whispered.  "So are you."

He touched her cheek with the tips of his fingers.  "Oh, Cato," he said
in a shaken whisper.  "I was so scared I'd lose you both."

Her eyes widened.  "Both?  Does that mean... "That I've finally
realized what an idiot I've been?  Yes.  I love you, Caroline.  And I
love our daughter."

Tears filled her eyes, and one by one they spilled over.  "Oh, Jack."

As they gazed at each other the air vibrated with poignant feelings too
deeply felt and too beautiful to express.  Caroline's gaze was filled
with love and wonder and a dreamy softness, Jack's with awe and
adoration and a fierce possessiveness.  "Caroline," he whispered again.
With the baby between them, he bent and took her lips in an exquisitely
soft kiss that sent shudders rippling through them both.

Their lips clung sweetly, but after a moment the baby began to squirm
and make sharp little grunting noises.  Jack lifted his head and
grimaced wryly.  "I think we're being scolded."

Smiling, Caroline stroked her daughter's cheek, and both she and Jack
laughed when the little rosebud mouth made a sucking motion.

Sitting down on the edge of the bed, Jack picked up his wife's hand and
held it between both of his.  He looked straight into her eyes.
"Caroline, love of my life, will you marry me?"

Her mouth dropped.  "Marry you?  But... we're already married," she
protested weakly.

"Legally, yes.  But this time I want to do it fight, and for the fight
reasons.  In church with all the trimmings, and all our friends and...
yes, dammit, even our families there.  I want the whole world to see
how much you and our daughter mean to me."

The declaration, made with such heartfelt sincerity, left Caroline so
choked with emotions she could not speak.  She could only gaze at him
over the top of their daughter's fuzzy head and nod as tears streamed
down her face.

Six weeks later, on Mother's Day, in a flower-bedecked church filled to
capacity, with Jack's father acting as best man and Matron of Honor
Louise, holding Anna Beth, Jack and Caroline pledged their love to each
other and exchanged the vows that bound them together in marriage.
Forever.

Dear Reader

Is there any feeling as intense or all-consuming as that rush of fierce
love that oven rheims you when you hold your newborn in your arms for
the first time?  I don't think so.  From the instant of birth, those
tiny fingers clutch your heart and never let go.  The love you feel for
your child is absolute, unconditional, and never-ending.

I was especially intrigued when my editor suggested I write a story
from the hero's perspective--something on the father's reaction to
impending parenthood.

Men experience the same awesome feelings as women when they become
parents.  Many times, however--perhaps because they are not as in touch
with their emotions as women, or because of some misguided notion of
masculinity imposed on them by society--they are not as receptive to
the idea in the beginning.

When we married, my husband wasn't sure he wanted to be a father.  He
had not had much experience with children and he wasn't convinced that
he would be a good parent.  (Of course, we women know that it's the men
who care enough to worry about such things who are the very ones who
should be fathers.)

When our daughter was born he was so overwhelmed with love for her he
instantly forgot every doubt he ever had about parenthood.  That love
and concern and caring has not diminished one iota over the years.  He
was, and remains, the kind of father I wish every child could have
loving protective, supportive and giving of himself.  He is eternally
thankful that he did not deny himself the great joy and blessing of
fatherhood.

That was the lesson my hero, Jack Riley, had to learn.  I hope you
enjoyed his struggle to arrive at that awesome and indisputable
truth.

THE BABY INVASION

Raye Mor an

To Marie Ferrarella, for trying hard to understand the secret life of
dogs.