|
|
|
|
|
|
the heels of those memories would come othersthe courage and sense of duty that sent Geoffrey out not only to protect his friend Engelard's mistress but to fight the fire to save others with whom he had no connection. Of course, she admired the courage and sense of duty, but such attributes would always thrust Geoffrey forward into any danger that threatened. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Again her heart died at the thought. Again she saw the terror-haunted eyes that had looked for so many years out of her mother's face. The pang that would rend her when she thought of Geoffrey dead would nearly draw a cry of agony from her. She could not face a lifetime of such pain; she could not. Better the dull misery, the sullen ache of a longing for what she could not have. It was true any husband her mother chose would be a courageous and most honorable man and, thus, would also be exposed to danger, but Joanna would not care. She only cared about Geoffrey. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Would she care less about Geoffrey if he was not her husband? Geoffrey and Ian were close tied in love. She would still know when Geoffrey went into danger. She would still see him very often, still fear for him. Then why not marry him and make everyone happy? Except herself . . . And so the thoughts went round and round. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
One aspect of the problem Joanna did her best to avoid. It was one thing to consider a different husband for herself, quite another to consider a different wife for Geoffrey. The stab of jealousy induced by that idea was no less painful than the agony fear induced. It was not possible to avoid the idea completely. A letter of thanks from Lady Maud, written in the most graceful terms by a skilled scribe, brought the painful question vividly to Joanna's mind. Somehow, the letter seemed fuller of Geoffrey than of thanks. In the midst of all his pleasures and duties at court, Lady Maud informed Joanna, Geoffrey had not forgotten so poor a creature as herself. He had explained her fate and her troubles to Engelard so well that all had been solved. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
It seemed to Joanna that the compliments should have been showered on Engelard, who had been to the trouble of |
|
|
|
|
|