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Page 303
he would do it, but, had honor not bound him, he would have been gladder to go down to defeat in Llewelyn's service than grasp victory in John's.
The only good thing that could be said for Geoffrey's situation was that more pressing troubles left him little time to worry about Joanna. In that he was better off than his betrothed, who was no nearer a decision on which path would subject her to less misery. If she repudiated the contract with Geoffrey, would that diminish her love? Certainly his absences in the past year had not diminished it. She would have another husband to occupy her mind, of course. Joanna shuddered with distaste. It seemed more likely to her that a different husband would fix her attention more firmly on Geoffrey because of the constant, unfavorable comparisons she would be forced to make.
It did not occur to Joanna that it was odd that Geoffrey should have become handsomer, braver, and more perfectnot that any man did not require careful watching and managementthan Ian or even her rosy and marvelous memory of her father. She did not question the logic of whether Ian and Simon had diminished in stature or Geoffrey had unaccountably increased. All that was clear to her was that there was no man to match him in all England, and probably in all the world. Thus, to marry anyone else would subject her to lifelong sorrow and regret. Joanna was not of the kind who would knowingly choose second best and take pleasure in it.
Then, obviously, the answer was to go ahead with the marriage. This conviction always produced an immediate lightening of Joanna's spirit. She was not unaware of how disappointed Ian and her mother would be and how hurt William of Salisbury and Ela would be if she said she wished to break the marriage contract. The pleasure she felt would last for a little while, during which time she would dwell happily on the memory of Geoffrey's caresses, Geoffrey's sweet voice and skilled fingers lending life and joy to long evenings, Geoffrey's sturdy strength backing her as she sat to give justice or faced any other problem. Hard on

 
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