The screen door slammed behind John Rayburn, rattling in its
frame. He and his dad had been meaning to fix the hinges and paint
it before winter, but just then he wanted to rip it off and fling it
into the fields.
“Johnny?” his mother called after him, but by then he was in the
dark shadow of the barn. He slipped around the far end and any more
of his mother’s calls were lost among the sliding of cricket legs.
His breath blew from his mouth in clouds.
John came to the edge of the pumpkin patch, stood for a moment,
then plunged into it. Through the pumpkin patch was east, toward
Case Institute of Technology where he hoped to start as a freshman
the next year. Not that it was likely. There was always the
University of Toledo, his father had said. One or two years of work
could pay for a year of tuition there.
He kicked a half-rotten pumpkin. Seeds and wispy strings of
pumpkin guts spiraled through the air. The smell of dark earth and
rotten pumpkin reminded him it was a week before Halloween and they
hadn’t had time to harvest the pumpkins: a waste and a thousand
dollars lost to earthworms. He ignored how many credits that money
would have bought.
The pumpkin field ended at the tree line, the eastern edge of the
farm. The trees—old maples and elms—abutted McMaster Road, beyond
which was the abandoned quarry. He stood in the trees, just
breathing, letting the anger seep away.
It wasn’t his parents’ fault. If anyone was to blame, it was him.
He hadn’t had to beat the crap out of Ted Carson. He hadn’t had to
tell Ted Carson’s mom off. That had entirely been him. Though the
look on Mrs. Carson’s face had almost been worth it when he told her
her son was an asshole. What a mess.
He spun at the sound of a stick cracking.
For a moment he thought that Ted Carson had chased him out of the
farmhouse, that he and his mother were there in the woods. But the
figure who stood there was just a boy, holding a broken branch in
his hand.
“Johnny?” the boy said. The branch flagged in his grip, touching
the ground.
John peered into the dark. He wasn’t a boy; he was a teenager.
John stepped closer. The teen was dressed in jeans and plaid shirt.
Over the shirt he wore a sleeveless red coat that looked oddly out
of date.
His eyes lingered on the stranger’s face. No, not a stranger. The
teen had his face.
“Hey, Johnny. It’s me, Johnny.”
The figure in the woods was him.
John looked at this other John, this John Subprime, and decided
he would be the one. He was clearly a Johnny Farmboy, not one of the
Johnny Rebels, not one of the Broken Johns, so he would be wide-eyed
and gullible. He’d believe John’s story, and then John could get on
with his life.
“Who . . . who are you?” Johnny Farmboy asked. He was dressed in
jeans and a shirt, no coat.
John forced his most honest smile. “I’m you, John.”
“What?”
Johnny Farmboy could be so dense.
“Who do I look like?”
“You look like . . .”
“I look just like you, John. Because I am you.” Johnny Farmboy
took a step back, and John continued. “I know what you’re thinking.
Some trick. Someone is playing a trick on the farmboy. No. Let’s get
past that. Next you’re going to think that you were twins and one of
them was put up for adoption. Nope. It’s much more interesting than
that.”
Johnny Farmboy crossed his arms. “Explain it, then.”
“Listen, I’m really hungry; I could use some food and a place to
sit down. I saw Dad go in the house. Maybe we can sit in the barn,
and I can explain everything.”
John waited for the wheels to turn.
“I don’t think so,” Johnny Farmboy finally said.
“Fine. I’ll turn around and walk away. Then you’ll never get to
hear the story.”
John watched the emotions play across Farmboy’s face. Typically
skeptical, he was debating how full of crap this wraith in the night
was, while desperately wanting to know the answer to the riddle.
Farmboy loved puzzles.
Finally his face relaxed. “Let’s go to the barn,” he said.
The stranger walked at his side, and John eased away from him. As
they walked through the pumpkin patch, John noted that their strides
matched. John pulled open the back door of the barn, and the young
man entered ahead of him, tapping the light switch by the door.
“A little warmer,” he said. He rubbed his hands together and
turned to John.
The light hit his face squarely, and John was startled to see the
uncanny match between them. The sandy hair was styled differently
and was longer. The clothes were odd; John had never worn a coat
like that. The young man was just a bit thinner as well. He wore a
blue backpack, so fully stuffed that the zipper wouldn’t close all
the way. There was a cut above his eye. A bit of brown blood was
crusted over his left brow, clotted but recent.
He could have passed as John’s twin.
“So, who are you?”
“What about a bite of something to eat?”
John went to the horse stall and pulled an apple from a bag. He
tossed it to the young man. He caught it and smiled at John.
“Tell the story, and I might get some dinner from the house.”
“Did Dad teach you to be so mean to strangers? I bet if he found
me in the woods, he’d invite me in to dinner.”
“Tell,” John said.
“Fine.” The young man flung himself on a hay bale and munched the
apple. “It’s simple, really. I’m you. Or rather I’m you genetically,
but I grew up on this same farm in another universe. And now I’ve
come to visit myself.”
“Bullshit. Who put you up to this?”
“Okay, okay. I didn’t believe me either.” A frown passed over his
face. “But I can prove it. Hold on a second.” He wiped his mouth
with the back of his hand. “Here we go: That horse is named Stan or
Dan. You bought him from the McGregors on Butte Road when you were
ten. He’s stubborn and willful and he hates being saddled. But he’ll
canter like a show horse if he knows you have an apple in your
pocket.” He turned to the stalls on his left. “That pig is called
Rosey. That cow is Wilma. The chickens are called Ladies A through
F. How am I doing so far?” He smiled an arrogant smile.
“You stole some of your uncle’s cigarettes when you were twelve
and smoked them all. You killed a big bullfrog with your bb gun when
you were eight. You were so sickened by it you threw up and haven’t
used a gun since. Your first kiss was with Amy Walder when you were
fourteen. She wanted to show you her underwear too, but you ran home
to Mommy. I don’t blame you. She’s got cooties everywhere I go.
“Everyone calls you Johnny, but you prefer John. You have a stash
of Playboys in the barn loft. And you burned a hole in the
rug in your room once. No one knows because you rearranged your room
so that the night stand is on top of it.” He spread his arms like a
gymnast who’d just struck a landing.
“Well? How close did I come?” He smiled and tossed the apple core
into Stan’s stall.
“I never kissed Amy Walder.” Amy had gotten pregnant when she was
fifteen by Tyrone Biggens. She’d moved to Montana with her aunt and
hadn’t come back. John didn’t mention that everything else he’d said
was true.
“Well, was I right?”
John nodded. “Mostly.”
“Mostly? I nailed it on the head with a hammer, because it all
happened to me. Only it happened in another universe.”
How did this guy know so much about him? Who had he talked to?
His parents? “Okay. Answer this. What was my first cat’s name?”
“Snowball.”
“What is my favorite class?”
“Physics.”
“What schools did I apply to?”
The stranger paused, frowned. “I don’t know.”
“Why not? You know everything else.”
“I’ve been traveling, you know, for a while. I haven’t applied to
college yet, so I don’t know. As soon as I used the device, I became
someone different. Up till then, we were the same.” He looked tired.
“Listen. I’m you, but if I can’t convince you, that’s fine. Let me
sleep in the loft tonight and then I’ll leave.”
John watched him grab the ladder, and he felt a twinge of guilt
at treating him so shabbily. “Yeah, you can sleep in the loft. Let
me get you some dinner. Stay here. Don’t leave the barn, and hide if
someone comes. You’d give my parents a heart attack.”
“Thanks, John.”
John watched Farmboy disappear through the door into the night,
shuddering and then exhaling. He hadn’t even come to the hard part
yet.
It would have been so easy to kill Farmboy, a blow to the back of
the head, and it was his. But John wouldn’t do that. He hoped, not
yet. He was desperate, but not willing to commit homicide. Or would
it be suicide?
He chuckled grimly to himself. Dan the Man nickered in
response.
John took an apple from the basket and reached out to the horse.
Suddenly his eyes were filled with tears.
“Hold yourself together, man,” he whispered as he let Dan
gingerly chomp the apple from his hand. His own Dan was dead, at his
own hand.
He’d taken Dan riding and had tried for the fence beyond the back
field. They had flown. But Dan’s hind left hadn’t cleared it. The
bone had broken, and John ran sobbing to his farm.
His father met him halfway, a rifle in his hand, his face grim.
He’d seen the whole thing.
“Dan’s down!” John cried.
His father nodded and handed the rifle to him.
John took it blankly, then tried to hand it back to his
father.
“No!”
“If the leg’s broken, you must.”
“Maybe. . . .” But he stopped. Dan was whinnying shrilly; he
could hear it from where they stood. The leg had been horribly
twisted. There was no doubt.
“Couldn’t Dr. Kimble look at him?”
“How will you pay for that?”
“Will you?”
His father snorted and walked away.
John watched him trudge back to the house until Dan’s cries
became too much for him. He turned then, tears raining down his
cheeks.
Dan’s eyes were wide. He shook his head heavily at John, then he
settled when John placed the barrel against his skull. Perhaps he
knew. John fished an apple from his pocket and slipped it between
Dan’s teeth.
The horse held it there, not biting, waiting. He seemed to nod at
John. Then John had pulled the trigger.
The horse had shuddered and fallen still. John sank to the ground
and cried for Dan for an hour.
But here he was. Alive. He rubbed Dan’s muzzle.
“Hello, Dan. Back from the dead,” John said. “Just like me.”
His mother and father stopped talking when the door slammed, so
he knew they’d been talking about him.
“I’m gonna eat in the barn,” he said. “I’m working on an
electronics experiment.”
He took a plate from the cabinet and began to dish out the
lasagna. He filled the plate with enough to feed two of him.
His father caught his eye, then said, “Son, this business with
the Carson boy . . .”
John slipped a second fork into his pocket. “Yeah?”
“I’m sure you did the right thing and all.” John nodded at his
father, saw his mother look away.
“He hates us because we’re farmers and we dig in the dirt.” His
mother lifted her apron strap over her neck, hung the apron on a
chair, and slipped out of the kitchen.
“I know that, Johnny . . . John. But sometimes you gotta keep the
peace.”
John nodded. “Sometimes I have to throw a punch, Dad.” He turned
to go.
“John, you can eat in here with us.”
“Not tonight, Dad.”
Grabbing a quart of milk, he walked through the laundry room and
left out the back door.
“Stan never lets anyone do that but me.”
John turned from rubbing Dan’s ears. “Just so,” he said. He took
the proffered paper towel full of lasagna, dug into it with the
extra fork Farmboy had fetched.
“I always loved this lasagna. Thanks.”
Farmboy frowned, and John recognized the stubbornness; he did the
same thing when presented with the impossible. He decided to stay
silent and stop goading him with the evidence. This John needed a
softer touch.
John ate in silence while Farmboy watched, until finally he said,
“Let’s assume for a moment that you are me from another universe.
How can you do it? And why you?”
Through a mouthful of pasta, he said, “With my device, and I
don’t know.”
“Elaborate,” John said, angry.
“I was given a device that lets me pass from one universe to the
next. It’s right here under my shirt. I don’t know why it was me. Or
rather I don’t know why it was us.”
“Stop prancing around my questions!” Farmboy shouted. “Who gave
you the device?”
“I did!” John grinned.
“One of us from another universe gave you the device.”
“Yeah. Another John. Nice looking fellow.” So far all he had said
was the truth.
Farmboy was silent for a while, his lasagna half-eaten. Finally
he said, “I need to feed the sheep.” He poured a bag of corn into
the trough. John lifted the end of it with him. “Thanks.” They fed
the cows and the horse afterwards, then finished their own
dinner.
Farmboy said, “So if you are me, what do I call you?”
“Well, John won’t work, will it? Well, it will if there’s just
the two of us, but as soon as you start adding the infinite number
of Johns out there . . . how about John Prime?”
“Then who gave you the device?”
“Superprime,” John Prime said with a smile. “So do you believe me
yet?”
Farmboy was still dubious. “Maybe.”
“All right. Here’s the last piece of evidence. No use denying
this.” He pulled up his pant leg to reveal a long white scar, devoid
of hair. “Let’s see yours,” John said, pushing down his panic. The
last time he’d tried this, it hadn’t been there.
Farmboy looked at the scar, and then pulled his jeans up to the
knee. The cold air of the barn drew goose bumps on his calf
everywhere except the puckered flesh of his own identical scar.
When John Prime had been twelve, he and Bobby Walder had climbed
the barbed wire fence of old Mrs. Jones to swim in her pond. Mrs.
Jones had set the dogs on them, and they’d had to run naked across
the field, diving over the barbed wire fence. John hadn’t quite
cleared it.
Bobby had run off, and John had limped home. The cut on his leg
had required three dozen stitches and a tetanus shot.
“Now do you believe?” John Prime asked.
John stared at the scar on his leg. “I believe. Hurt like hell,
didn’t it?”
“Yes,” John Prime said with a grin. “Yes, it did, brother.”
John sat in the fishbowl—the glass-enclosed room outside the
principal’s office—ignoring the eyes of his classmates and wondering
what the hell John Prime was up to. He’d left his twin in the barn
loft with half his lunch and an admonition to stay out of sight.
“Don’t worry,” he’d said with a smirk. “Meet me at the library
after school.”
“Don’t let anyone see you, all right?”
John Prime had smiled again.
“John?” Principal Gushman stuck his head out of his office.
John’s stomach dropped; he was never in trouble.
Mr. Gushman had a barrel chest, balding head, and perpetual
frown. He motioned John to a chair and sat behind the desk, letting
out his breath heavily as he sat. He’d been a major in the Army,
people said. He liked to be strict. John had never talked with him
in the year he’d been principal.
“John, we have a policy regarding violence and bullying.”
John opened his mouth to speak.
“Hold on. Let me finish. The facts of the matter are these. You
hit a classmate—a younger classmate—several times in the locker
room. He required a trip to the emergency room and stitches.” He
opened a file on his desk.
“The rules are there for the protection of all students. There
can be no violence in the school. There can be no exceptions. Do you
understand?”
John stared, then said, “I understand the rule. But—”
“You’re a straight-A student, varsity basketball and track.
You’re well-liked. Destined for a good college. This could be a
blemish on your record.”
John knew what the word “could” meant. Gushman was about to offer
him a way out.
“A citation for violence, as stated in the student handbook,
means a three-day suspension and the dropping of any sports
activities. You’d be off the basketball and track teams.”
John’s throat tightened.
“Do you see the gravity of the situation?”
“Yes,” John managed to say.
Gushman opened another folder on his desk. “But I recognize this
as a special case. So if you write a letter of apology to Mrs.
Carson, we’ll drop the whole matter.” Gushman looked at him,
expecting an answer.
John felt cornered. Yes, he had hit Ted, because he was a prick.
Ted needed hitting, if anyone did; he had dropped John’s clothes in
the urinal. He said, “Why does Mrs. Carson want the letter? I didn’t
hit her. I hit Ted.”
“She feels that you showed her disrespect. She wants the letter
to address that as well as the violence.”
If he just wrote the letter, it would just all go away. But he’d
always know that his mother and Mrs. Carson had squashed him. He
hated that. He hated any form of defeat. He wanted to tell Gushman
he’d take the suspension. He wanted to throw it all in the man’s
face.
Instead, he said, “I’d like to think about it over the weekend if
that’s okay.”
Mr. Gushman’s smile told John that he was sure he’d bent John to
his will. John went along with it, smiling back. “Yes. You may. But
I need a decision on Monday.”
John left for his next class.
John walked past the librarian, his Toledo Meerkats cap low over
his face. He didn’t want to be recognized as John Rayburn. At least
not yet. The reference section was where he expected it to be, which
was a relief. If the little things were the same he had hope for the
bigger things. He’d tried living in the weird places, but sooner or
later something tripped him up and he had to run.
He needed a place like what he remembered, and so far, this place
seemed pretty close.
He reached for the almanac. Sure an encyclopedia had more
information, but he could be lost in the details for hours. All he
needed was a gross comparison.
He ran his finger down the list of presidents, recognizing all of
them. He already knew this wasn’t a world where Washington served
four terms and set a standard for a king-president serving life
terms. Turning the page, he found the next twenty presidents to be
the same until the last four. Who the hell was Bill Clinton?
The deviation was small, even so. It had to be, he was so tired
of running.
John found a quiet table, opened his backpack, and began
researching.
The city library was just a couple of blocks from the school.
John wandered through the stacks until he found John Prime at the
center study desk in a row of three on the third floor. He had a
dozen Findlay Heralds spread out, as well as a couple of
books. His backpack was open, and John saw that it was jammed with
paper and folders.
To hide his features, John Prime wore a Toledo Meerkats baseball
hat and sunglasses. He pulled off his glasses when he saw John, and
said, “You look like crap. What happened to you?”
“Nothing. Now what are you doing? I have to get back to the
school by five. There’s a game tonight.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” John Prime picked up the history book. “In
every universe I’ve been in, it’s always something simple. Here
George Bush raised taxes and he never got elected to a second term.
Clinton beat him in ’91.” He opened the history book and pointed to
the color panel of American Presidents. “In my world, Bush never
backed down on the taxes thing, and the economy took off and he got
elected to his second term. He was riding even higher when Hussein
was assassinated in the middle of his second term. His son was
elected in 1996.”
John laughed, “That joker?”
John Prime scowled. “Dubya worked the national debt down to
nothing. Unemployment was below 3 percent.”
“It’s low here too. Clinton did a good job.”
John Prime pointed to a newspaper article he had copied.
“Whitewater? Drug use? Vince Foster?” He handed the articles to
John, then shook his head. “Never mind. It’s all pretty much
irrelevant anyway. At least we didn’t grow up in a world where Nixon
was never caught.”
“What happened there?”
“The Second Depression usually. Russia and the US never coming to
an arms agreement. Those are some totalitarian places.” He took the
articles back from John. “Are there Post-It notes in this
world?”
“Yes. Of course.”
John Prime shrugged. “Sometimes there aren’t. It’s worth a
fortune. And so simple.” He pulled out his notebook. “I have a
hundred of them.” He opened his notebook to a picture of the MTV
astronaut. “MTV?”
“Yep.”
“The World Wide Web?”
“I think so.”
“Rubik’s Cube?”
“Never heard of it.”
John Prime checked the top of the figure with a multi-colored
cube. “Ah ha. That’s a big money maker.”
“It is?”
He turned the page. “Dungeons and Dragons?”
“You mean that game where you pretend to be a wizard?”
“That’s the one. How about Lozenos? You got that here?”
“Never heard of it. What is it?”
“Candy. South African diamond mines?”
They worked through a long list of things, about three-quarters
of which John had heard of, fads, toys, or inventions.
“This is a good list to work from. Some good money makers on
this.”
“What are you going to do?” John asked. This was his world, and
he didn’t like what he suspected John Prime had in mind.
John Prime smiled. “There’s money to be made in interdimensional
trade.”
“Interdimensional trade?”
“Not in actual goods. There’s no way I can transport enough stuff
to make a profit. Too complicated. But ideas are easy to transport,
and what’s in the public domain in the last universe is unheard of
in the next. Rubik sold one hundred million Cubes. At ten dollars a
cube, that’s a billion dollars.” He lifted up the notebook. “There
are two dozen ideas in here that made hundreds of millions of
dollars in other worlds.”
“So what are you going to do?”
John Prime smiled his arrogant smile. “Not me. We. I need an
agent in this world to work the deals. Who better than myself ? The
saying goes that you can’t be in more than one place at a time. But
I can.”
“Uh huh.”
“And we split it fifty-fifty.”
“Uh huh.”
“Listen. It’s not stealing. These ideas have never been thought
of here. The people who invented these things might not even be
alive here.”
“I never said it was stealing,” John said. “I’m just not so sure
I believe you still.”
John Prime sighed. “So what’s got you so down today?”
John said, “I may get suspended from school and kicked off the
basketball and track teams.”
“What? Why?” John Prime looked genuinely concerned.
“I beat up a kid, Ted Carson. His mother told my mother and the
principal. They want me to apologize.”
John Prime was angry. “You’re not gonna, are you? I know Ted
Carson. He’s a little shit. In every universe.”
“I don’t have a choice.”
“There’s always a choice.” John Prime pulled a notebook out of
his bag. “Ted Carson, huh? I have something on him.”
John looked over his shoulder at the notebook. Each page had a
newspaper clipping, words highlighted and notes at the bottom
referencing other pages. One title read, “Mayor and Council Members
Indicted.” The picture showed Mayor Thiessen yelling. Another
article was a list of divorces granted. John Prime turned the page
and pointed. “Here it is. Ted Carson picked up for torturing a
neighbor’s cat. Apparently the boy killed a dozen neighborhood
animals before getting caught.” He glanced at John.
“I’ve never heard anything about that.”
“Then maybe he never got caught here.”
“What are we going to do with that?” John asked. He read the
article, shaking his head.
“Grease the gears, my brother.” He handed John a newspaper
listing of recent divorces. “Photocopy this.”
“Why?”
“It’s the best place to figure out who’s sleeping with who. That
usually doesn’t change from one universe to the next. Speaking of
which, how does Casey Nicholson look in this universe?”
“What?”
“Yeah. Is she a dog or a hottie? Half the time she’s pregnant in
her junior year and living in a trailer park.”
“She’s a cheerleader,” John said.
John Prime glanced at him and smiled. “You like her, don’t you?
Are we dating her?”
“No!”
“Does she like us?”
“Me! Not us,” John said. “And I think so. She smiles at me in
class.”
“What’s not to love about us?” He glanced at his watch. “Time for
you to head over to the school, isn’t it?”
“Yeah.”
“I’ll meet you at home tonight. See ya.”
“Don’t talk to anyone,” John said. “They’ll think it was me.
Don’t get me in trouble.”
“Don’t worry. The last thing I want to do is screw up your life
here.”
“Casey, Casey, Casey,” John thought as he watched Johnny Farmboy
depart. Casey Cheerleader was the best Casey of all. She smelled so
clean. And it was all wasted on Johnny Farmboy.
He had planned on working until the library closed, but the idea
of seeing Casey was overwhelming. He halfheartedly perused a few
microfiched newspapers, then packed his things up and headed for the
school.
Once again he was hit with nostalgia as he walked through the
small Findlay downtown. He had spent his entire life in this little
town—well, not this particular town. For a moment he wanted
to run into Maude’s Used Books and rummage through the old comic
books. But the counter clerk would surely recognize him. Not
yet, he thought.
The junior varsity team was playing when he reached the high
school stadium. He found a seat at the top of the bleacher and made
sure his ball cap covered his face. The sun was just dipping below
the far end zone, casting long violet shadows as the JV
teams—Findlay High was playing Gurion Valley—moved the ball
haphazardly up and down the field. Watching the shadows was more
interesting.
But then the game was over, and the stands were filling. He
recognized faces, year old memories, but still vivid. He shrank down
on the bench, pulled up the collar on his ski coat. Then he laughed
at himself. Always hiding, always running. Not this time.
The varsity cheerleaders came on the field. He spotted Casey
immediately and he felt a spurt of hormones course through him.
Across universes he’d come for her, he thought. How was that for a
pickup line?
Goddamn, she was beautiful. He stood to get a better look.
“Hey, John!” someone shouted, two rows down.
John looked at him, shocked. He had no idea who he was. A wave of
doubt shook him. He’d been gone a year; how much had he missed in
that time?
“Hey.”
“Shouldn’t you be down with the team? I thought you were keeping
stats.”
“Yeah, I was just going.”
John took the bleacher steps two at a time, nearly running. He
had things to do before he could gawk at Casey.
After the game John left a copy of the stats with Coach Jessick
and then met his father in the parking lot.
“Not a good game for the home team,” his father said. He wore his
overalls and a John Deere hat. John realized he’d sat in the stands
like that, with manure on his shoes. Soft country and western
whispered tinnily from the speakers. For a moment he was
embarrassed, then he remembered why he’d had to fight Ted
Carson.
“Thanks for picking me up, Dad.”
“No problem.” He dropped the truck into gear and pulled it out of
the lot. “Odd thing. I thought I saw you in the stands.”
John glanced at his father, forced himself to be calm. “I was
down keeping stats.”
“I know, I saw. Must be my old eyes, playing tricks.”
Had John Prime not gone back to the barn? What was that bastard
doing to him?
“Gushman called.”
John nodded in the dark of the cab. “I figured.”
“Said you were gonna write an apology.”
“I don’t want to,” John said. “But. . . .”
“I know. A stain on your permanent record and all.” His father
turned the radio off. “I was at the U in Toledo for a semester or
two. Me and college didn’t get along much. But you, son. You can
learn and do something interesting with it. Which is really what me
and your mother want.”
“Dad—”
“Hold on a second. I’m not saying what you did to the Carson boy
was wrong, but you did get caught at it. And if you get caught at
something, you usually have to pay for it. Writing a letter saying
something isn’t the same as believing it.”
John nodded. “I think I’m gonna write the letter, Dad.”
His father grunted, satisfied. “You helping with the apples
tomorrow? We wait any longer and we won’t get any good ones.”
“Yeah, I’ll help until lunch. Then I have basketball
practice.”
“Okay.”
They sat in silence for the remainder of the trip. John was glad
his father was so pragmatic.
As they drove up to the farmhouse, John considered what he was
going to do about John Prime.
“Where are you?”
John paused in his scanning of the newspaper and gripped a
shovel. It might have come to violence anyway; Johnny Farmboy looked
pissed.
“Up here.”
“You went to the football game,” he accused as he climbed the
ladder.
“Just for a bit.”
“My dad saw you.”
“But he didn’t realize it was me, did he?”
Farmboy’s anger faded a notch. “No, no. He thought he was seeing
things.”
“See? No one will believe it even if they see us together.”
Farmboy shook his head. He grunted.
John added, “This Ted Carson thing is about to go away.”
“What do you mean?”
“A bunch of cats have gone missing over there.”
“You went out in public and talked to people?”
“Just kids. And it was dark. No one even saw my face. Three cats
this month, by the way. Ted is an animal serial killer. We can pin
this on him and his mom will have to back off.”
“I’m writing the letter of apology,” Farmboy said.
“What? No!”
“It’s better this way. I don’t want to screw up my future.”
“Listen. It’ll never get any better than this. The kid is a
psychopath and we can shove it in his parents’ faces!”
“No. And listen. You have got to lay low. I don’t want you
wandering around town messing up things,” Farmboy said. “Going to
the library today was too much.”
John smiled. “Don’t want me hitting on Casey Nicholson, huh?”
“Stop it!” He raised his hand. “That’s it. Why don’t you just
move on? Hit the next town or the next universe or whatever. Just
get out of my life!”
John frowned. It was time for the last shot. He lifted up his
shirt. Under his grey sweatshirt was a shoulder harness with a thin
disk the diameter of a softball attached at the center. It had a
digital readout which said 7533, three blue buttons on the front,
and dials and levers on the sides.
John began unstrapping the harness and said, “John, maybe it’s
time you saw for yourself.”
John looked at the device. It was tiny for what it was supposed
to do.
“How does it work?” he asked. John envisioned golden wires
entwining black vortices of primal energy, x-ray claws tearing at
the walls of the universe as if they were tissue.
“I don’t know how it works,” John Prime said, irritated. “I just
know how to work it.” He pointed to the digital readout. “This is
your universe number.”
“Seventy-five thirty-three?”
“My universe is 7433.” He pointed to the first blue button. “This
increments the universe counter. See?” He pressed the button once
and the number changed to 7534. “This one decrements the counter.”
He pressed the second blue button and the counter flipped back to
7533. He pointed to a metal lever on the side of the disk. “Once
you’ve dialed in your universe, you pull the lever and—Pow!—you’re
in the next universe.”
“It looks like a slot machine,” John said.
John Prime pursed his lips. “It’s the product of a powerful
civilization.”
“Does it hurt?” John asked.
“I don’t feel a thing. Sometimes my ears pop because the
weather’s a little different. Sometimes I drop a few inches or my
feet are stuck in the dirt.”
“What’s this other button for?”
John Prime shook his head. “I don’t know. I’ve pressed it, but it
doesn’t seem to do anything. There’s no owner’s manual, you know?”
He grinned. “Wanna try it out?”
More than anything, John wanted to try it. Not only would he know
for sure if John Prime was full of crap, but he would get to see
another universe. The idea was astounding. To travel, to be free of
all this . . . detritus in his life. Ten more months in Findlay was
a lifetime. Here in front of him was adventure.
“Show me.”
John Prime frowned. “I can’t. It takes twelve hours to recharge
the device after it’s used. If I left now, I’d be in some other
universe for a day before I could come back.”
“I don’t want to be gone a day! I have chores. I have to write a
letter.”
“It’s okay. I’ll cover for you here.”
“No way!”
“I can do it. No one would know. I’ve been you for as long as you
have.”
“No. There’s no way I’m leaving for twelve hours with you in
control of my life.”
John Prime shook his head. “How about a test run? Tomorrow you’re
doing what?”
“Picking apples with my dad.”
“I’ll do it instead. If your dad doesn’t notice a thing, then you
take the trip, and I’ll cover for you. If you leave tomorrow
afternoon, you can be back on Sunday and not miss a day of school.”
John Prime opened his backpack wider. “And to make the whole trip a
lot more fun, here’s some spending money.” He pulled out a stack of
twenty dollar bills.
“Where did you get that?” John had never seen so much money. His
bank account had no more than three hundred dollars in it.
John Prime handed him the stack of cash. The twenties were crisp,
the paper smooth-sticky. “There’s got to be two thousand dollars
here.”
“Yep.”
“It’s from another universe, isn’t it? This is counterfeit.”
“It’s real money. And no one in this podunk town will be able to
tell me that it’s not.” John Prime pulled a twenty out of his own
pocket. “This is from your universe. See any differences?”
John took the first twenty off the stack and compared it to the
crumpled bill. They looked identical to him.
“How’d you get it?”
“Investments.” John Prime’s smile was ambiguous.
“Did you steal it?”
John Prime shook his head. “Even if I did steal it, the police
looking for it are in another universe.”
John felt a twinge of apprehension. John Prime had his
fingerprints, his looks, his voice. He knew everything there was to
know about him. He could rob a bank, kill someone, and then escape
to another universe, leaving John holding the bag. All the evidence
of such a crime would point to him, and there was no way he could
prove that it wasn’t him.
Would he do such a thing? John Prime had called John his brother.
In a sense they were identical brothers. And John Prime was letting
John use his device, in effect stranding him in this universe. That
took trust.
“Twenty-four hours,” John Prime said. “Think of it as a vacation.
A break from all this shit with Ted Carson.”
The lure of seeing another universe was too strong. “You pick
apples with my father tomorrow. If he doesn’t suspect anything, then
maybe I’ll take the trip.”
“You won’t regret it, John.”
“But you have got to promise not to mess anything up!”
John Prime nodded. “That’s the last thing I’d want to do,
John.”
* * *
“Damn, it’s early,” John said, rubbing the straw from his
hair.
“Don’t let my dad hear you cursing,” Johnny Farmboy said.
“Right, no cursing.” John stood, stretching. “Apple picking? I
haven’t done that . . . in a while.” It had been a lot longer than a
year. His own father hadn’t bothered with the orchard in years.
John peered out a small window. Farmboy’s father was already out
there with the tractor.
“What’s up between you and your dad? Anything heavy?” John asked.
Johnny Farmboy took off his coat and handed it to John, taking
John’s in return.
John shook his head. “We talked last night about the Carson
thing. He wanted me to write the letter.”
“So that’s it. What about your mother?”
“She was pissed with me before. She still may be. We haven’t
talked since Thursday.”
“Anything happening this afternoon?” John Prime took a pencil out
and started jotting things down.
“Nothing until tomorrow. Church, then chores. Muck the stalls.
Homework. But I’ll do that.”
“What’s due for Monday?”
“Reading for Physics. Essay for English on Gerard Manley Hopkins.
Problem set in Calculus. That’s it.”
“What’s your class schedule like?”
Farmboy began to tell him, but then said, “Why do you need to
know that? I’ll be back.”
“In case someone asks.”
“No one’s gonna ask.” As Farmboy pulled John’s ski jacket on, he
looked through his binoculars. “I’ll watch from here. If anything
goes wrong, you pretend to be sick and come back to the barn. You’ll
brief me and then we switch back.”
John Prime smiled. “Nothing’s gonna happen. Relax.” He pulled on
gloves and climbed down the ladder. “See ya at lunch.”
With more trepidation than he showed, John walked out to the
orchard. He cast one glance over his shoulder and saw Farmboy
watching him through binoculars. This was a test in more ways than
one. He could still run. He could still find another bolthole.
His father barely glanced at him, said, “How ’bout we start this
end?”
“Okay,” John said, his throat dry. His father stood tall, and
when he walked past he smelled of dirt, not booze. He walked up to a
tree and turned to look at him.
“Well? Come on.”
John gripped a branch and pulled himself into the tree. The rough
bark cut his hands through the gloves. His foot missed a hold, and
he slipped.
“Careful there.”
“I’m getting too big for this,” John said.
“Next year, I’ll have to hire someone to help me.”
John paused, words of banter on his lips. He smiled. “I bet mom
could do it.”
His father laughed. “Now there’s a thought.”
* * *
John felt a twinge of jealousy as he watched his father laugh at
John Prime’s joke. He wondered what John Prime had said to make his
father laugh. Then he realized that if his father was laughing at
John Prime’s jokes, there was no danger of being found out.
The precarious nature of his situation bothered him. Effectively,
John Prime was him. And he was . . . nobody. Would it be that hard
for someone to slip into his life? He realized that it wouldn’t. He
had a few immediate relationships, interactions that had happened
within the last few weeks that were unique to him, but in a month,
those would all be absorbed into the past. He had no girlfriend. No
real friends, except for Erik, and that stopped at the edge of the
court. The hardest part would be for someone to pick up his studies,
but even that wouldn’t be too hard. All his classes were a breeze,
except Advanced Physics, and they were starting a new module on
Monday. It was a clear breaking point.
John wondered what he would find in another universe. Would there
be different advances in science? Could he photocopy a scientific
journal and bring it back? Maybe someone had discovered a unified
theory in the other universe. Or a simple solution to Fermat’s Last
Theorem. Or . . . but what could he really do with someone else’s
ideas? Publish them under his own name? Was that any different than
John Prime’s scheme to get rich with Rubik’s Square, whatever that
was? He laughed and picked up his physics book. He needed to stay
caught up in this universe. They were starting Quantum Mechanics on
Monday, after all.
John brought Johnny Farmboy a sandwich.
“Your mom didn’t notice either.”
He took the sandwich, pausing to look John in the eye. “You look
happy.”
John started. His clothes were covered in sap. His hands were cut
and raw. His shoulders ached. He had always loathed farm work. Yet .
. .
“It felt good. I haven’t done that in a while.”
Around a bite of sandwich, Farmboy said, “You’ve been gone a long
time.”
“Yeah,” John said. “You don’t know what you have here. Why do you
even want to go to college?”
Farmboy laughed. “It’s great for the first fifteen years, then it
really begins to drag.”
“I hear you.”
Farmboy handed John his ski jacket. “What will I see in the next
universe?”
John’s heart caught. “So you’re gonna take me up on the offer?”
he said casually.
“Yeah, I think so. Tell me what I’ll see.”
“It’s pretty much like this one, you know. I don’t know the exact
differences.”
“So we’re in the next universe?”
“Yeah. I wouldn’t try to meet him or anything. He doesn’t know
about us.”
“Why’d you pick me to talk to? Why not some other me? Or why not
all of us?”
“This is the most like home,” John said. “This feels like I
remember.”
“In one hundred universes this is the one that is most like
yours? How different are we from one to the next? It can’t be too
different.”
“Do you really want to hear this?”
Farmboy nodded.
“Well, there are a couple types of us. There’s the farm boy us,
like you and me. Then there’s the dirt bag us.”
“Dirt bag?”
“Yeah. We smoke and hang out under the bleachers.”
“What the hell happened there?”
“And sometimes we’ve knocked up Casey Nicholson and we live in
the low income houses on Stuart. Then there’s the places where we’ve
died.”
“Died?”
“Yeah. Car accidents. Tractor accidents. Gun accidents. We’re
pretty lucky to be here, really.”
Farmboy looked away, and John knew what he was thinking. It was
the time he and his father had been tossing hay bales and the
pitchfork had fallen. Or it was the time he had walked out on old
Mrs. Jones’ frozen pond, and the ice had cracked, and he’d kept
going. Or the time the quarry truck had run him off the road. It was
a fluke really that either of them was alive.
Finally Farmboy said, “I think I’m ready. What’s the plan?”
John Prime lifted up his shirt and began unbuckling the harness.
“You leave from the pumpkin field. Select the universe one forward.
Press the toggle. Spend the day exploring. Go to the library. Figure
out what’s different. If you want, write down any money-making ideas
you come across.” When he saw Farmboy’s face, John added, “Fine.
Then don’t. Tomorrow, flip the counter back to this universe and
pull the lever. You’ll be back for school on Monday.”
“Sounds easy enough.”
“Don’t lose the device! Don’t get busted by the police! Don’t do
anything to draw attention to yourself.”
“Right.”
“Don’t flash your money either. If anyone recognizes you, go with
it and then duck out. You don’t want to make it hot for our guy over
there.”
“Right.”
“Johnny, you look a little nervous. Calm down. I’ll keep you
covered on this end.” John slapped him on the back, then handed him
the harness.
Farmboy pulled off his shirt and shivered. He passed the two
bands of the harness over his shoulders, then connected the center
belt behind his back. The disk was cold against his belly. The
straps looked like a synthetic material.
“It fits.”
“It should,” John said. “I copied some of my materials for you in
case you need them.” John Prime pulled a binder from his own bag,
opened it to show him pages of clippings and notes. “You never know.
You might need something. And here’s a backpack to hold it all
in.”
John felt a twinge pass through him. He was powerless. The device
was out of his control.
“What’s wrong?” Farmboy asked.
“I haven’t been away from the device in a long time. It’s my
talisman, my escape. I feel naked without it. You gotta be careful
with it.”
“Hey,” John said. “I’m leaving my life in your hands. How about a
little two-way trust?”
John smiled grimly. “Okay. Are you ready? I’ve got 12:30 on my
watch. Which means you can return half an hour past midnight.
Okay?”
John checked his watch. “Okay.”
“Toggle the universe.”
John lifted the shirt and switched the number forward to 7534.
“Check.”
“Okay. I’ll watch from the loft.” John climbed the ladder, then
turned. “Make sure no one sees you.”
His heart was racing. This was it. It was almost his. He looked
down from the barn window, waved.
Farmboy waved back, then he lifted up his shirt. Sunlight caught
the brushed metal of the device.
Farmboy hesitated.
“Go!” John whispered. “Do it.”
Farmboy smiled, pulled the switch, and disappeared.
John’s ears popped and his feet caught in the dirt. He stumbled
and fell forward, catching himself on his gloved hands. He wasn’t in
a pumpkin patch anymore. Noting the smell of manure, he realized he
was in a cow pasture.
He worked his feet free. His shoes were embedded an inch into the
earth. He wondered if there was dirt lodged in his feet now. It
looked like the dirt in the current universe was an inch higher here
than in the old one. Where did that extra inch of dirt go? He shook
his feet and the dirt fell free.
It worked! He felt a thrill. He’d doubted to the last second, but
here he was, in a new universe.
He paused. John Prime had said there was a John in this universe.
He spun around. Cows grazed contentedly a few hundred yards away,
but otherwise the fields were empty, the trees gone. There was no
farmhouse.
McMaster Road was there and so was Gurney Road. John walked from
the field, hopped the fence, and stood at the corner of the roads.
Looking to the north toward town, he saw nothing but a farmhouse
maybe a mile up the road. To the east, where the stacks of the GE
plant should have been, he saw nothing but forest. To the south,
more fields.
John Prime had said there was a John Rayburn in this universe.
He’d said that the farm was here. He’d told John he’d been to this
universe.
John pawed up his jacket and shirt and tried to read the number
on the device. He cupped his hand to shield the sun and read 7534.
He was where he expected to be, according to the device. There was
nothing here.
The panic settled into his gut. Something was wrong. Something
had gone wrong. He wasn’t where he was supposed to be. But that’s
okay, he thought, calming himself. It’s okay. He walked to the edge
of the road and sat on the small berm there.
Maybe John Prime had it wrong; there were a lot of universes and
if all of them were different that was a lot of facts to keep
straight.
He stood, determined to assume the best. He’d spend the next
twelve hours working according to the plan. Then he’d go back home.
He set off for town, a black mood nipping at his heels.
John watched his other self disappear from the pumpkin field and
felt his body relax. Now he wouldn’t have to kill him. This way was
so much better. A body could always be found, unless it was in some
other universe. He didn’t have the device, of course, but then he’d
never need it again. In fact he was glad to be rid of it. John had
something more important than the device; he had his life back.
It had taken him three days of arguing and cajoling, but finally
Johnny Farmboy had taken the bait. Good riddance and goodbye. He had
been that naive once. He’d once had that wide-eyed gullibility,
ready to explore new worlds. There was nothing out there but pain.
He was alive again. He had parents again. He had money—$125,000. And
he had his notebook. That was the most important part. The notebook
was worth a billion dollars right there.
John looked around the loft. This would be a good place for some
of his money. If he remembered right, there was a small cubbyhole in
the rafters on the south side of the loft. He found it and pulled
out the bubble gum cards and slingshot that was hidden there.
“Damn farmboy.”
He placed about a third of his money in the hiding place. Another
third he’d hide in his room. The last third, he’d bury. He wouldn’t
deposit it like he’d done in 7489. Or had that been 7490? The cops
had been on his ass so fast. So Franklin had been looking the wrong
way on all those bills. He’d lost $80,000.
No, he’d be careful this time. He’d show legitimate sources for
all his cash. He’d be the talk of Findlay, Ohio as his inventions
started panning out. No one would suspect the young physics genius.
They’d be jealous, sure, but everybody knew Johnny Rayburn was a
brain. The Rubik’s Cube—no, the Rayburn’s Cube—would be his road to
fame and riches.
John reached the outskirts of town in an hour, passing a green
sign that said “Findlay, Ohio. Population 6232.” His Findlay had a
population in the twenty thousand range. As he stood there, he heard
a high-pitched whine grow behind him. He stepped off the berm as a
truck flew by him, at about forty-five miles per hour. It was in
fact two trucks in tandem pulling a large trailer filled with
gravel. The fronts of the trucks were flat, probably to aid in
stacking several together for larger loads, like a train with more
than one locomotive. The trailer was smaller than a typical dump
truck in his universe. A driver sat in each truck. Expecting to be
enveloped in a cloud of exhaust, John found nothing fouler than
moist air.
Flywheel? he wondered. Steam?
Despite his predicament, John was intrigued by the engineering of
the trucks. Ten more minutes of walking, past two motels and a
diner, he came to the city square, the Civil War monument displayed
as proudly as ever, cannon pointed toward the South. A few people
were strolling the square, but no one noticed him.
Across the square was the courthouse. Beside it stood the
library, identical to what he remembered, a three-story building,
its entrance framed by granite lions reclining on brick pedestals.
There was the place to start figuring this universe out.
The library was identical in layout to the one he knew. John
walked to the card catalog—there were no computer terminals—and
looked up the numbers for American history. On the shelf he found a
volume by Albert Trey called US History and Heritage: Major
Events that Shaped a Nation. He sat in a low chair and paged
through it. He found the divergence in moments.
The American Revolution, War of 1812, and Civil War all had the
expected results. The presidents were the same through Woodrow
Wilson. World War I was a minor war, listed as the Greco-Turkish
War. World War II was listed as the Great War and was England and
the US against Germany, Russia, and Japan. A truce was called in
1956 after years of no resolution to the fighting. Hostilities had
flared for years until the eighties when peace was declared and
disarmament accomplished in France, which was split up and given to
Germany and Spain.
But all of those things happened after Alexander Graham Bell
developed an effective battery for the automobile. Instead of an
internal combustion engine, cars and trucks in this universe used
electric engines. That explained the trucks: electric engines.
But even as he read about the use of zeppelins for transport, the
relatively peaceful twentieth century, his anger began to grow. This
universe was nothing like his own. John Prime had lied. Finally, he
stood and found the local telephone book. He paged through it,
looking for Rayburns. As he expected, there were none.
He checked his watch; in eight hours he was going back home and
kicking the crap out of John Prime.
His mother called him to dinner, and for a moment he froze with
fear. They’ll know, he thought. They’ll know I’m not their
son.
Breathing slowly, he hid the money back under his comic book
collection in the closet.
“Coming!” he called.
During dinner he kept quiet, focusing on what his parents
mentioned, filing key facts away for later use. There was too much
he didn’t know. He couldn’t volunteer anything until he had all his
facts right.
Cousin Paul was still in jail. They were staying after church
tomorrow for a spaghetti lunch. His mother would be canning and
making vinegar that week. His father was buying a turkey from Sam
Riley, who had a flock of twenty or so. The dinner finished with
homemade apple pie that made the cuts on his hands and the soreness
in his back worth it.
After dinner he excused himself. In his room he rooted through
Johnny Farmboy’s bookbag. He’d missed a year of school; he had a lot
of make-up to do. And, crap, an essay on Gerard Manley Hopkins,
whoever the heck that was.
By the time the library closed, John’s head was full of facts and
details about the new universe. There were a thousand things he’d
like to research, but there was no time. He stopped at a newspaper
shop and picked an almanac off the shelf. After a moment’s
hesitation, he offered to buy the three-dollar book with one of the
twenties John Prime had given him. The counter man barely glanced at
the bill and handed John sixteen dollars and change. The bills were
identical to those in his own world. The coins bore other faces.
He ate a late dinner at Eckart’s cafe, listening to rockabilly
music. None of it was familiar music, but it was music that was
playable on the country stations at home. Even at ten in the
evening, there was a sizeable crowd, drinking coffee and hard
liquor. There was no beer to be had.
It was a tame crowd for a Saturday night. He read the almanac and
listened in to the conversations around him. Most of it was about
cars, girls, and guys, just like in his universe.
By midnight, the crowd had thinned. At half-past midnight, John
walked into the square and stood behind the Civil War statue. He
lifted his shirt and toggled the number back to 7533.
He paused, checked his watch and saw it was a quarter till one.
Close enough, he figured.
He pressed the button.
Nothing happened.
He managed to get through church without falling asleep. Luckily
the communion ritual was the same. If there was one thing that
didn’t change from one universe to the next, it was church.
He expected the spaghetti lunch afterwards to be just as boring,
but across the gymnasium, John saw Casey Nicholson sitting with her
family. That was one person he knew where Johnny Farmboy stood with.
She liked him, it was clear, but Johnny Farmboy had been too
clean-cut to make a move. Not so for him. John excused himself and
walked over to her.
“Hi, Casey,” he said.
She blushed at him, perhaps because her parents were there.
Her father said, “Oh, hello, John. How’s the basketball team
going to do this year?”
John wanted to yell at him that he didn’t give a rat’s ass. But
instead he smiled and said, “We’ll go all the way if Casey is there
to cheer for us.”
Casey looked away, her face flushed again. She was dressed in a
white Sunday dress that covered her breasts, waist, and hips with
enough material to hide the fact that she had any of those features.
But he knew what was there. He’d seduced Casey Nicholson in a dozen
universes at least.
“I’m only cheering fall sports, John,” she said softly. “I play
field hockey in the spring.”
John looked at her mother and asked, “Can I walk with Casey
around the church grounds, Mrs. Nicholson?”
She smiled at him, glanced at her husband, and said, “I don’t see
why not.”
“That’s a great idea,” Mr. Nicholson said.
Casey stood up quickly, and John had to race after her. She
stopped after she had gotten out of sight of the gymnasium, hidden
in the alcove where the rest rooms were. When John caught up to her,
she said, “My parents are so embarrassing.”
“No shit,” John said.
Her eyes went wide at his cursing, then she smiled.
“I’m glad you’re finally talking to me,” she said.
John smiled and said, “Let’s walk.” He slipped his arm around her
waist, and she didn’t protest.
There was no sensation of shifting, no pressure change. The
electric car in the parking lot was still there. The device hadn’t
worked.
He checked the number: 7533. His finger was on the right switch.
He tried it again. Nothing.
It had been twelve hours. Twelve hours and forty-five minutes.
But maybe John Prime had been estimating. Maybe it took thirteen
hours to recharge. He leaned against the base of the statue and slid
to the ground.
He couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. John
Prime had lied to him about what was in Universe 7534. Maybe he had
lied about the recharge time. Maybe it took days or months to
recharge the device. And when he got back, he’d find that John Prime
was entrenched in his life.
He sat there, trying the switch every fifteen minutes until three
in the morning. He was cold, but finally he fell asleep on the
grass, leaning against the Civil War Memorial.
He awoke at dawn, the sun in his eyes as it streamed down
Washington Avenue. He stood and jumped up and down to revive his
body. His back ached, but the kinks receded after he did some
stretches.
At a donut shop off the square, he bought a glazed and an orange
juice with the change he had left over from the almanac. A dozen
people filed in over the course of an hour to buy donuts and coffee
before church or work. On the surface, this world was a lot like
his.
John couldn’t stand the waiting. He walked across the square and
climbed the library steps and yanked at the door. They were locked,
and he saw the sign showing the library’s hours. It was closed until
noon.
John looked around. There was an alcove behind the lions with a
bench. No one would easily see him from the street. He sat there and
tried the device. Nothing.
He continued to try the lever every ten or fifteen minutes. As he
sat on the steps of the library, his apprehension grew. He was going
to miss school. He was going to miss more than twenty-four hours. He
was going to miss the rest of his life. Why wouldn’t the device work
like it was supposed to?
He realized then that everything John Prime had told him was
probably a lie. He had to assume that he was the victim of John
Prime’s scheming, trapped in another universe. The question was how
he would return to his life.
He had the device. It had worked once, to bring him from Universe
7533 to Universe 7534. It would not allow him to return because it
wasn’t recharged yet. It took longer than—he checked his
watch—twenty hours to recharge the device, apparently.
He stopped. He was basing that logic on information he got from
John Prime. Nothing that John Prime had said could be used as valid
information. Only things that John had seen or gotten from a valid
source were true. And John Prime was not a valid source.
The twelve hour recharge time was false. He had assumed that it
meant the length of time was what was false in John Prime’s
statement. What if there was no recharge time at all?
There were two possibilities that John could see. First, there
was no recharge time and he was being prevented from returning to
his universe for some other reason. Second, the device no longer
worked. Perhaps he had used the last of its energy source.
For some reason he still wanted to believe John Prime. If it was
simply a mechanical issue, then he could use intelligence to solve
the problem. Maybe John Prime was truthful, and something happened
to the device that he didn’t know about. Maybe John Prime would be
surprised when John never returned with the device, effectively
trapping John Prime in John’s life. John Prime might even think that
John had stolen his device.
But mechanical failure seemed unlikely. John Prime said he had
used the device one hundred times. His home universe was around
7433. If he’d used it exactly one hundred times, that was the
distance in universes between John’s and John Prime’s. Did that mean
he only used the device to move forward one universe at a time? Or
did he hop around? No, the numbers were too similar. John Prime
probably moved from one universe to the next systematically.
John decided that he was just too ignorant to ignore all of John
Prime’s information. Some of it had to be taken at face value.
The one hundred number indicated that John only incremented the
universe counter upward. Why? Did the device only allow travel in
one direction?
He played with the theory, fitting the pieces together. The
device was defective or designed in such a way that only travel
upward was allowed. John Prime mentioned the recharge time to
eliminate any possibility of a demonstration. There was perhaps no
recharge time. The device was of no value to John Prime, since he
planned to stay. That explained the personal questions John Prime
had asked; he wanted to ease into John’s life. Some things he knew,
but other things he had to learn from John.
The fury built in John.
“Bastard!” he said softly. John Prime had screwed him. He’d
tempted him with universes, and John had fallen for it. And now he
was in another universe, where he didn’t exist. He had to get
back.
There was nothing to do, he realized, but test the theory.
He pulled his backpack onto his shoulders and checked around the
bench for his things. Then, with a quick check to see if anyone was
looking, he toggled the device to 7535 and pulled the lever.
He fell.
Monday morning at school went no worse than expected. John barely
made it to homeroom, and ended up sitting with the stoners by
accident. He had no idea what the word “Buckle” meant in the Hopkins
poem. And Mr. Wallace had to flag him down for physics class.
“Forget which room it is?” he asked.
“Er.”
There was no Mr. Wallace in John’s home universe, and he had to
dodge in-jokes and history between him and Johnny Farmboy; the class
was independent study! John realized he’d have to drop it. He was
grateful when a kid knocked on the door.
“Mr. Gushman needs to see John Rayburn.”
Mr. Wallace took the slip of paper from the acne-ridden freshman.
“Again? Read the assignment for tomorrow, John. We have a lot to
cover.” The man was disappointed in him, but John couldn’t find the
emotion to care. He hardly knew him.
John nodded, then grabbed his stuff. He nudged the freshman hall
monitor as they walked down the hall. “Where’s Mr. Gushman at?”
The freshman’s eye widened like marbles. “He’s in the front
office. He’s the principal.”
“No shit, douche bag,” John said.
John entered the fish bowl and gave his name to the receptionist.
After just a few minutes, Mr. Gushman called him in.
John didn’t have anything on Gushman. He’d come to Findlay High
School in the time John had been away. The old principal had fucked
a student at his old school and that had come out in one of the
universes that John had visited. That bit of dirt would be no good
in this universe.
“Have you got the letter of apology for Mrs. Carson?” he
asked.
John suddenly realized what the meeting was about. He’d not
written the letter.
“No, sir. I’ve decided not to write the letter.”
Mr. Gushman raised his eyebrows, then frowned. “You realize that
this will have grave consequences for your future.”
“No, I don’t think so. In fact, I’ve contacted a lawyer. I’ll be
suing Ted Carson.” John hadn’t thought of doing that until that
moment, but now that he’d said it, he decided it was a good idea.
“I’m an honor student, Gushman. I’m a varsity player in two sports.
There will be fallout because of this. Big fallout.”
“It’s Mr. Gushman, please. I’ll have your respect.” His knuckles
were white, and John realized that Gushman had expected him to cave.
Well, maybe Johnny Farmboy would have caved, but not him. He had
dirt on the education board members. He had dirt on the mayor. This
would be a slam dunk for him.
“Respect is earned,” John said.
“I see. Shall I have your mother called or do you have
transportation home?”
“Home? Why?” John said.
“Your three day suspension starts right now.” John had forgotten
about that. He shrugged. Johnny Farmboy would have shit a brick at
being expelled. To John, it didn’t really matter.
“I can take care of myself.”
“You are not allowed on school property until Thursday at noon.
I’ll be sending a letter home to your parents. I’ll also inform
Coach Jessick that you are off the roster for basketball and
track.”
“Whatever.”
Mr. Gushman stood, leaning heavily on the desk. His voice was
strained as he said, “I expected better of you, John. Everything I
know about you says that you’re a good boy. Everything I’ve seen
since you walked in this door has made me reevaluate my
opinions.”
John shrugged again. “Whatever.” He stood, ignoring Gushman’s
anger. “We done here?”
“Yes. You are dismissed.”
At least he didn’t have to worry about learning basketball. And
three days was enough time to get started on his plans. He smiled as
he passed the receptionist, smiled at the dirtbags waiting in the
office. This was actually working out better than he expected.
John’s arms flailed and his left foot hit the ground, catching
his weight. He groaned as his leg collapsed under him. He rolled
across the grass.
Grass? he thought as the pain erupted in his knee. He sat
up, rocking as he held his knee to his chest. He’d been on the steps
of the library and now he was on a plain. The wind blew the smell of
outside: dirt, pollen, clover.
He tried to stretch his leg, but the pain was too much. He leaned
back, pulling off his backpack with one hand, and looked up at the
sky, breathing deeply. It hurt like hell.
The device had worked. He had changed universes again. Only this
universe had no library, no Findlay, Ohio. This universe didn’t seem
to have anything but grass. He fell because the steps he’d been
standing on weren’t in the universe he was in now.
He checked the readout on the device. He was in 7535. He’d gone
forward one universe.
John looked around him, but didn’t see anything through the
green-yellow grass. It rustled in the wind, making sounds like
sandpaper rubbing on wood.
John stood gingerly on his other leg. He was on a broad plain,
stretching for a good distance in every direction. There were small
groves of trees to the north and east. To the west and south, the
grass stretched as far as he could see.
There was no library to use to figure out what was different in
this universe. No humans at all, maybe. A Mayan empire? If he wanted
to find the differences, he’d have to do some field research.
He sat back down. No, he thought. He had to get back to his life.
John Prime had some answers to give and a price to pay. It was
Sunday afternoon. He still had half a day to figure out how to get
back to his universe.
His knee was swelling, so he took off his coat and shirt. He
ripped his T-shirt into long strips and used them to wrap his knee
as tightly as possible. It wasn’t broken, but he might have sprained
it.
He took the sandwich that he had packed on Saturday from his
backpack and unwrapped it. He finished it in several bites and
rinsed it down with some of the water in his water bottle. The taste
of the sandwich made him angry. John Prime was eating his food and
sleeping in his bed. John wondered how he would feel punching
someone who looked like him in the face. He decided that he could do
it.
John spent the afternoon, nursing his knee and considering what
he knew, what he thought he knew, and what John Prime had told him.
The latter category he considered biased or false. What he knew,
however, was growing.
Universe 7535 was the second one he’d visited. The device clearly
still worked. His going from 7534 to 7535 proved that.
It was also support for his theory that the device only allowed
travel to universes higher in number than the one a traveler
currently resided in. But not proof. Hypotheses required repeatable
experimental proof. He’d used the device to move forward through two
universes. He’d have to do it a couple more times before he was
certain that that was the way the device worked.
He took a blade of grass and chewed on it. This was an unspoiled
universe, he thought. Which gave him another piece of data.
Universes sequentially next to each other could have little in
common. John couldn’t even begin to guess what had happened for a
universe to not have North America settled by the Europeans.
There’d been no library steps here, so he had fallen ten feet to
the ground. More data: There was no guarantee that a man-made object
in one universe would exist in the next. Nor even natural objects.
Hills were removed or added by machines. Rivers were dammed and
moved. Lakes were created. What would happen if he jumped to the
next universe and the steps were there? Would he be trapped in the
cement that formed the steps? Would he die of asphyxiation, unable
to press the lever because he was encased in the library steps?
The thought of being entombed, blind and without air, horrified
him. It was no way to die.
He would have to be careful when he changed universes. He’d have
to be as certain as possible that there was nothing solid where he
was going. But how?
Movement caught his eye and he looked up to see a large beast
walking in the distance. It was so tall he saw it from his seat in
the grass. A cross between a rhinoceros and a giraffe, it munched at
the leaves of a tree. It was grey with legs like tree limbs, a face
like a horse. Leaves and branches gave way quickly to its gobbling
teeth.
No animal like that existed in his universe.
John watched, amazed. He wished he had a camera. A picture of
this beast would be a nice addition to his scrapbook. Would it be
worth cash? he wondered.
Ponderously it moved to the next tree in the grove.
John looked around him with more interest. This was no longer a
desolate North America. There were animals here that no longer
existed in his timeline. This universe was more radically different
than he could have imagined.
The wave of the grass to the west caught his attention. The grass
bobbed against the wind, and he was suddenly alert. Something was in
the grass not twenty yards from him. He realized that large
herbivores meant large carnivores. Bears, mountain lions, and wolves
could be roaming these plains. And he had no weapons. Worse still,
he had a bum knee.
He looked around him for a stick or a rock, but there was
nothing. Quickly he gathered the notebook into the backpack. He
pulled his coat on.
Was the thing closer? he wondered. He glanced at the grass
around him. Why hadn’t he thought of that earlier?
John felt beneath his shirt for the device. He glanced down and
toggled the universe counter up one to 7536. But he dared not pull
the lever. He could be under the library right now.
He looked around him, tried to orient himself. The library
entrance faced east, toward the Civil War Memorial. If he traveled
east two hundred feet, he’d be in the middle of the park and it was
unlikely that anything would be in his way. It was the safest place
he could think of to do the transfer.
Suppressing a groan he moved off in an easterly direction,
counting his steps.
At fifty-two steps he heard a sound behind him. A dog-like
creature stood ten yards away from him in his wake in the grass. It
had a dog’s snout and ears, but its eyes were slit and its back was
arched more like a cat’s. It had no tail. Its fur was tan with black
spots the size of quarters along its flank.
John froze, considering. It was small, the size of a border
collie. He was big prey and it may just have been curious about
him.
“Boo-yah!” he cried, waved his arms. It didn’t move, just stared
at him with its slit eyes. Then two more appeared behind it.
It was a pack animal. Pack animals could easily bring down an
animal larger than a pack member. He saw three of them, but there
could be a dozen hidden in the grass. John turned and ran.
The things took him from behind, nipping his legs, flinging
themselves onto his back. He fell, his leg screaming. He felt weight
on his back, so he let the straps of his backpack slide off. He
crawled forward another yard. Hoping he’d come far enough, he pulled
the lever on the device.
John took the two o’clock Silver Mongoose to Toledo, right after
he stood in line at the Department of Motor Vehicles trying to
convince the clerk to file the paperwork for his lost license.
“I am positive that it won’t turn up,” John said.
“So many people say that, and then there it is in the last place
you look.”
“Really. It won’t.”
“All righty, then. I’ll take that form from you.”
He was tempted to rent a car, but that would have raised as many
eyebrows as hiring a patent lawyer in Findlay. John had to go to
Toledo to get his business done. Three days off school was just
about perfect.
As the northern Ohio farmland rolled by, he wondered how hurt
he’d be if he had to transfer out right now. He was always
considering his escape routes, always sleeping on the ground floor,
always in structures that were as old as he could find. His chest
itched where the device should have been. It was Johnny Farmboy’s
problem now. He was free of it. No one would come looking for him
here. He blended right in. No police would come barging in at three
AM. No FBI agents wanting his device.
What an innocent he’d been. What a piece of work. How many times
had he almost died? How many times had he screwed up within inches
of the end?
For a moment, he had a twinge of guilt for the displaced John. He
hoped that he figured out a few things quickly, before things went
to hell. Maybe he could find a place to settle down just like he
had. Maybe I should have written him a note, he thought.
Then he laughed to himself. Too late for that. Johnny Farmboy was
on his own. Just like he had been.
A car horn screeched and a massive shape bore down on him. John
tried to scramble away, but his hand was stuck. As his wrist flexed
the wrong way, pain shot up his arm.
He looked up, over his shoulder, into the grill of a car. John
hadn’t made it into the park. He was still in the street, the
sidewalk a few feet in front of him.
John got to his knees. His hand was embedded in the asphalt. He
planted his feet and pulled. Nothing happened except pain.
“Buddy, you okay?” The driver was standing with his door open.
John’s eyes were just over the hood of the man’s car.
John didn’t reply. Instead he pulled again and his hand tore lose
with a spray of tar and stones. The impression of his palm was cast
in the asphalt.
The man came around his car and took John’s arm. “You better sit
down. I’m really sorry about this. You came outta nowhere.” The man
led him to the curb, then looked back and said, “Jesus. Is that your
dog?”
John looked and saw the head and shoulders of one of the
cat-dogs. The transfer had caught only half the beast. Its jaws were
open, revealing yellowed teeth. Its milky eyes were glazed over.
Blood from its severed torso flowed across the street. A strand of
intestine had unraveled onto the pavement.
“Oh, man. I killed your dog,” the motorist cried.
John said between breaths, “Not . . . my . . . dog. . . . Chasing
me.”
The man looked around. “There’s Harvey,” he said, pointing to a
police officer sitting in the donut shop that John had eaten in that
morning. Well, not the same one, John thought. This wasn’t
the same universe, since this car was gas powered.
“Hey, Harvey,” he yelled, waving his arms. Someone nudged the
police officer and he turned, looking at the blood spreading across
the street.
Harvey was a big man, but he moved quickly. He dropped his donut
and coffee in a trash can at the door of the shop. As he approached
he brushed his hands on his pants.
“What happened, Roger?” he said. He glanced at John, who was too
winded and too sore to move. He looked at the cat-dog on the street.
“What the hell is that?”
He kicked it with his boot.
“This young man was being chased, I think. I nearly clipped him
and I definitely got that thing. What is it? A badger?”
“Whatever it is, you knocked the crap out of it.” He turned to
John. “Son, you okay?”
“No,” John said. “I twisted my knee and my wrist. I think that
thing was rabid. It chased me from around the library.”
“Well, I’ll be,” said the officer. He squatted next to John.
“Looks like it got a piece of your leg.” He lifted up John’s pant
leg, pointed to the line of bite marks. “Son, you bought yourself
some rabies shots.”
The officer called Animal Control for the carcass and an
ambulance for John. The white-uniformed Animal Control man spent
some time looking for the other half of the cat-dog. To Harvey’s
questions about what it was, he shrugged. “Never seen nothing like
it.” When he lifted up the torso, John saw the severed arm straps of
his backpack on the ground. He groaned. His backpack, with seventeen
hundred dollars in cash, was in the last universe under the other
half of the cat-dog.
A paramedic cleaned John’s calf, looked at his wrist and his
knee. She touched his forehead gingerly. “What’s this?”
“Ow,” he said, wincing.
“You may have a concussion. Chased by a rabid dog into a moving
car. Quite a day you’ve had.”
“It’s been a less than banner day,” John said.
“ ‘Banner day,’ ” she repeated. “I haven’t heard that term in a
long time. I think my grandmother said that.”
“Mine too.”
They loaded him into the ambulance on a stretcher. By the time
the door had shut on the ambulance, quite a few people had gathered.
John kept expecting someone to shout his name in recognition, but no
one did. Maybe he didn’t exist in this universe.
They took him to Roth Hospital, and it looked just like it did in
his universe, an institutional building from the fifties. He sat for
fifteen minutes on an examining table off of the emergency room.
Finally, an older doctor came in and checked him thoroughly.
“Lacerations on the palm. The wrist has a slight sprain. Minor.
The hand is fine.” Looking at John’s knee, he added, “Sprain of the
right knee. We’ll wrap that. You’ll probably need crutches for a
couple days.”
A few minutes later, a woman showed up with a clipboard. “We’ll
need to fill these forms out,” she said. “Are you over
eighteen?”
John shook his head, thinking fast. “My parents are on the
way.”
“Did you call them?”
“Yes.”
“We’ll need their insurance information.”
John stood, wincing, and peered out the door until she
disappeared. Then he limped the other way until he found an
emergency exit door. He pushed it open and hobbled off into the
parking lot, the bleating of the siren behind him.
The first lawyer John visited listened to him for fifteen minutes
until she said she wasn’t taking any new clients. John almost
screamed at her, “Then why did you let me blather on for so
long?”
The second took thirty seconds to say no. But the third listened
dubiously to his idea for the Rayburn Cube. He didn’t even blink at
the cash retainer John handed over for the three patents he wanted
him to research and acquire.
He called Casey from his cheap hotel.
“Hey, Casey. It’s John!”
“John! I heard you were expelled for a month.”
“News of my expulsion has been greatly exaggerated.”
“What happened?”
“Just more of the Ted Carson saga. I told Gushman I wasn’t going
to apologize, so he kicked me out of school. You should have seen
the colors on his face.”
“You told Gushman no?” she asked. “Wow. He used to be a colonel
in the army.”
“He used to molest small children too,” said John.
“Don’t say that.”
“Why? He sucks.”
“But it’s not true.”
“It could be true, probably is in some other universe.”
“But we don’t know for sure.”
John switched subjects. “Listen, I called to see if you wanted to
go out on Saturday.”
“Yeah, sure,” she said quickly. “Yeah.”
“Movie?”
“Sounds good. What’s playing?”
“Does it matter?”
She giggled. “No.” After a moment, she added, “Didn’t your
parents ground you?”
“Oh, shit!”
“What?”
“They don’t know yet,” John said. He looked at the cheap clock
radio next to the bed: six-thirty. “Shit.”
“Do you think we can still go out?”
“One way or another, Casey, I’ll see you on Saturday.”
“I’m looking forward to it.”
He hung up.
His parents. He’d forgotten to call his parents. They were going
to be pissed. Damn. He’d been without them for so long, he’d
forgotten how they worked.
He dialed his home number.
“Mom?”
“Oh, my God!” she yelled. Then to his father, she said, “Bill,
it’s John. It’s John.”
“Where is he? Is he all right?”
“Mom, I’m okay.” He waited. He knew how Johnny Subprime would
play this. Sure, he’d never have gone to Toledo, but John could play
the suspension for all it was worth. “Did you hear from
Gushman?”
“John, yes, and it’s okay. We understand. You can come home. We
aren’t angry with you.”
“Then, Mom, you know how I feel. I did the right thing, Mom, and
they took everything away from me.” It was what Farmboy would have
said.
“I know, dear. I know.”
“It’s not fair.”
“I know, Johnny. Now where are you? You’ve got to come home.” His
mother sounded pitiful.
“I won’t be home tonight, Mom. I’ve got things to do.”
“He’s not coming home, Bill!”
“Give me the phone, Janet.” Into the phone, his father said,
“John, I want you home tonight. We understand that you’re upset, but
you need to be home, and we’ll handle this here, under our
roof.”
“Dad, I’ll be home tomorrow.”
“John—”
“Dad, I’ll be home tomorrow.” He hung up the phone and almost
chortled.
Then he turned on Home Theatre Office and watched bad movies
until midnight.
John shivered in the morning cold. His knee was the size of a
melon, throbbing from the night spent on the library steps. The bell
tower struck eight; John Prime would be on his way to school right
now. He’d be heading for English class. John hoped the bastard had
done the essay on Gerard Manley Hopkins.
He’d slept little, his knee throbbing, his heart aching. He’d
lost the 1700 dollars John Prime had given him, save eighty dollars
in his wallet. He’d lost his backpack. His clothes were ripped and
tattered. He’d skipped out on his doctor’s bill. He was as far from
home as he’d ever been.
He needed help.
He couldn’t stay here; the hospital probably called the police on
his unpaid bill. He needed a fresh universe to work in.
Limping, he walked across to the Ben Franklin’s, buying new
dungarees and a backpack.
Then he stood in the center of the town square and waited for a
moment when no one was around. He toggled the universe counter
upward and pressed the lever.
“It turns this way, this way, and this way!”
John made the motions with his hands for the fourth time, wishing
again that he’d bought the keychain Cube when he’d had the
chance.
“Why?” Joe Patadorn was the foreman for an industrial design
shop. A pad of paper on his drafting board was covered in pencil
sketches of cubes. “Rotate against what? It’s a cube.”
“Against itself ! Against itself ! Each column and each row
rotates.”
“Seems like it could get caught up with itself.”
“Yes! If it’s not a cube when you try to turn it, it’ll not
turn.”
“And this is a toy people will want to play with?”
“I’ll handle that part.”
Joe shrugged. “Fine. It’s your money.”
“Yes, it is.”
“We’ll have a prototype in two weeks.”
They shook on it.
His errands were finally done in Toledo. His lawyer was doing the
patent searches and Patadorn was building the prototype. If he was
lucky, he could have the first batch of Cubes ready to ship by
Christmas, perfect timing.
From the bus stop, he hiked the three miles to the farm and
stashed his contracts in the loft with the money there. When he was
climbing down, he saw his dad standing next to the stalls.
“Hey. Am I in time for dinner?” John asked.
His father didn’t reply, and then he realized that he was in
trouble.
His father’s face was red, his cheeks puffed out. He stood in
overalls, his fists at his hips.
“In the house.” The words were soft, punctuated.
“Dad—”
“In the house, now.” His father lifted an arm, pointing.
John went, and as he entered the house, he was angry too. How
dare he order him around?
His mother was waiting at the kitchen table, her fingers folded
in a clenched, white mound.
“Where were you?” his father demanded.
“None of your business,” John said.
“While you’re in my house, you’ll answer my questions!” his
father roared.
“I’ll get my things and go,” John said.
“Bill. . .” his mother said. “We’ve discussed this.”
His father looked away, then said, “He pranced into the barn like
he’d done nothing wrong.”
His mother turned to him. “Where were you, John?”
He opened his mouth to rail, but instead he said, “Toledo. I had
to . . . cool off.”
His mother nodded. “That’s important.”
“Yeah.”
“Are you feeling better now?”
“Yes . . . no.” Suddenly he was sick to his stomach. Suddenly he
was more angry with himself than with his father.
“It’s okay,” she said. “It’s okay what you did, and we’re glad
you’re back. Bill?”
His father grunted, then said, “Son, we’re glad you’re back.” And
then he took John in his big farmer arms and squeezed him.
John sobbed before he could fight it down, and then he was
bawling like he hadn’t since he was ten.
“I’m sorry, Dad.” The words were muffled in his shoulder. His
throat was tight.
“It’s okay. It’s okay.”
His mother joined them and they held onto him for a long time.
John found he didn’t want to let go. He hadn’t hugged his parents in
a long time.
John climbed the steps to the library. This universe looked just
like his own. He didn’t really care how it was different. All he
wanted was to figure out how to get home. He’d tried the device a
dozen times in the square, but the device would not allow him to go
backwards, not even to universes before his own.
He needed help; he needed professional help. He needed to
understand about parallel universes.
Browsing the card catalog, it soon became apparent the Findlay
library was not the place to do a scientific search on hypothetical
physics. All he could find were a dozen science fiction novels which
were no help at all.
He was going to have to go to Toledo. U of T was his second
choice after Case. It was a state school and close. Half his friends
would be going there. It had a decent if not stellar physics
department.
He took the bus to Toledo, dozing along the way. A local brought
him to the campus.
The Physics Library was a single room with three tables. Stacks
lined all the walls and extended into the middle of the room, making
it seem cramped and tiny. It smelled of dust, just like the Findlay
Public Library.
“Student ID?”
John turned to the bespectacled student sitting at the front
desk. For a moment, he froze, then patted his front pockets. “I left
it at the dorm.”
The student looked peeved then said, “Well, bring it next time,
frosh.” He waved him in.
“I will.”
John brought the catalog up on a terminal and searched for
“Parallel Universe.” There wasn’t much. In fact there was nothing at
all in the Physics Library. He was searching for the wrong subject.
Physicists didn’t call them parallel universes, of course. TV and
movies called them parallel universes.
He couldn’t think what else to search for. Perhaps there was a
more formal term for what he was looking for, but he had no idea
what it was. He’d have to ask his dumb questions directly of a
professor.
He left the library and walked down the second floor hall,
looking at name plates above doors. Billboards lined the walls,
stapled and tacked with colloquia notices, assistantship postings,
apartments to share. A lot of the offices were empty. At the end of
the hall was the small office of Dr. Frank Wilson, Associate
Professor of Physics, lit and occupied.
John knew associate professors were low on the totem pole, which
was probably why he was the only one in his office. And maybe a
younger professor would be more willing to listen to what he had to
say.
He knocked on the door.
“Come on in.”
He entered the office, found it cluttered on all sides with
bookshelves stacked to bursting with papers and tomes, but neat at
the center, where a man sat at an empty desk reading a journal.
“You’re the first person to show for office hours today,” he
said. Professor Wilson was in his late twenties, with black glasses,
sandy beard, and hair that seemed in need of a cut. He wore a grey
jacket over a blue oxford.
“Yeah,” John said. “I have some questions, and I don’t know how
to ask them.”
“On the homework set?”
“No. On another topic.” John was suddenly uncertain. “Parallel
universes.”
Professor Wilson nodded. “Hmmm.” He took a drink of his coffee,
then said, “Are you one of my students? Freshman Physics?”
“No,” John said.
“Then what’s your interest in this? Are you from the creative
writing department?”
“No, I . . .”
“Your question, while it seems simple to you, is extremely
complex. Have you taken calculus?”
“Just half a semester. . . .”
“Then you’ll never understand the math behind it. The authorities
here are Hawking, Wheeler, Everett.” He ticked them off on his
fingers. “You’re talking about quantum cosmology. Graduate level
stuff.”
John said quickly before he could cut him off again, “But my
question is more practical. Not theoretical.”
“Practical parallel worlds? Nonsense. Quantum cosmology states
that there may be multiple universes out there, but the most likely
one is ours, via the weak anthropic principle. Which means since
we’re here, we can take it as a given that we exist. Well, it’s more
complex than that.”
“But what about other universes, other people just like us?”
The man laughed. “Highly unlikely. Occam’s razor divests us of
that idea.”
“How would I travel between universes?” John said, grasping at
straws against the man’s brisk manner.
“You can’t, you won’t, not even remotely possible.”
“But what if I said it was. What if I knew for sure it was
possible.”
“I’d say your observations were manipulated or you saw something
that you interpreted incorrectly.”
John touched the wound in his calf where the cat-dog had bitten
him. No, he’d seen what he’d seen. He’d felt what he’d felt. There
was no doubt about that.
“I know what I saw.”
Wilson waved his hands. “I won’t debate your observations. It’s a
waste of my time. Tell me what you think you saw.”
John paused, not sure where to start and what to tell, and
Professor Wilson jumped in. “See? You aren’t sure what you saw, are
you?” He leaned forward. “A physicist must have a discerning eye. It
must be nurtured, tested, used to separate the chaff from the
wheat.” He leaned back again, glanced out his window onto the quad
below. “My guess is that you’ve seen too many Schwarzenegger movies
or read too many books. You may have seen something peculiar, but
before you start applying complex physical theories to explain it,
you should eliminate the obvious. Now, I have another student of
mine waiting, one I know is in my class, so I think you should run
along and think about what you really saw.”
John turned and saw a female student standing behind him,
waiting. His rage surged inside him. The man was patronizing him,
making assumptions based on his questions and demeanor. Wilson was
dismissing him.
“I can prove it,” he said, his jaw clenched.
The professor just looked at him, then beckoned the student into
his office.
John turned and stalked down the hall. He was asking for help,
and he’d been laughed at.
“I’ll show him,” John said. He took the steps two at a time and
flung open the door to the quadrangle that McCormick faced.
“Watch it, dude,” a student said, almost hit by the swinging
door. John brushed past him.
He grabbed a handful of stones and, standing at the edge of the
quadrangle, began flinging them at the window that he thought was
Wilson’s. He threw a dozen and started to draw a crowd of students,
until Wilson looked out the window, opened it and shouted, “Campus
security will be along in a moment.”
John yelled back, “Watch this, you stupid bastard!” He toggled
the device forward one universe and pulled the lever.
John awoke in the night, gripped by the same nightmare, trapped
in darkness, no air, his body held rigid. He sat up and flung the
covers away from him, unable to have anything touching him. He
ripped off his pajamas as well and stood naked in the bedroom, just
breathing. It was too hot; he opened the window and stood before
it.
His breathing slowed, as the heavy air of the October night
brought the smells of the farm to him: manure and dirt. He leaned
against the edge of the window, and his flesh rose in goose
pimples.
It was a dream he’d had before, and he knew where it came from.
He’d transferred near Lake Erie, on a small, deserted beach not far
from Port Clinton, and ended up buried in a sand dune. He’d choked
on the sand and would have died there if a fisherman hadn’t seen his
arm flailing. He could have died. It was pure luck that the guy had
been there to dig his head out. He’d never transferred near a body
of water or a river again.
That hadn’t been the only time either. In Columbus, Ohio, he’d
transferred into a concrete step, his chest and lower body stuck.
He’d been unable to reach the toggle button on the device and had to
wait until someone wandered by and called the fire department.
They’d used a jack- hammer to free him. When they’d turned to him,
demanding how he’d been trapped, he’d feigned unconsciousness and
transferred out from the ambulance.
After that, each time he touched the trigger he did so with the
fear that he’d end up in something solid, unable to transfer out
again, unable to breath, unable to move. He was nauseated, his
stomach kicking, his armpits soaked, before the jumps.
It was the cruelest of jokes. He had the most powerful device in
the world and it was broken.
“No more,” he said to himself. “No more of that.” He had a family
now, in ways he hadn’t expected.
The confrontation with his parents had been angry, then sad, and
ended with all of them crying and hugging. He’d meant to be tough;
he’d meant to tell his parents that he was an adult now, and could
take care of himself, but his resolve had melted in the face of
their genuine care for him. He’d cried, goddamn it all.
He’d promised to reconsider the letter. He’d promised to talk
with Gushman again. He’d promised to be more considerate to his
parents. Was he turning into Johnny Farmboy?
He’d gone to bed empty, spent, his mind placid. But his
subconscious had pulled the dream out. Smothering, suffocating, his
body held inflexible as his lungs screamed. He shivered, then shut
the window. His body had expelled all its heat.
He slipped back into bed and closed his eyes.
“I’m becoming Johnny Farmboy,” he whispered. “Screw it all.”
McCormick Hall looked identical. In fact the same student guarded
the door of the Physics Library, asked him the same question.
“Student ID?”
“I left it in my dorm room,” John replied without hesitation.
“Well, bring it next time, frosh.”
John smiled at him. “Don’t call me frosh again, geek.”
The student blinked at him, dismayed.
His visit with Professor Wilson had not been a total loss. Wilson
had mentioned the subject that he should have searched for instead
of parallel universes. He had said that the field of study was
called quantum cosmology.
Cosmology, John knew, was the study of the origin of the
universe. Quantum theory, however, was applied to individual
particles, such as atoms and electrons. It was a statistical way to
model those particles. Quantum cosmology, John figured, was a
statistical way to model the universe. Not just one universe,
either, John hoped, but all universes.
He sat down at a terminal. This time there were thirty hits. He
printed the list and began combing the stacks.
Half of the books were summaries of colloquia or workshops. The
papers were riddled with equations, and all of them assumed an
advanced understanding of the subject matter. John had no basis to
understand any of the math.
In the front matter of one of the books was a quote from a
physicist regarding a theory called the Many-Worlds Theory. “When a
quantum transition occurs, an irreversible one, which is happening
in our universe at nearly an infinite rate, a new universe branches
off from that transition in which the transition did not occur. Our
universe is just a single one of a myriad copies, each slightly
different than the others.”
John felt an affinity for the quote immediately. He had seen
other universes in which small changes had resulted in totally
different futures, such as Alexander Graham Bell’s invention of the
electric motor. It almost made sense then, that every universe he
visited was one of billions in which some quantum event or decision
occurred differently.
He shut the book. He thought he had enough to ask his questions
of Wilson now.
The second floor hallway seemed identical, right down to the
empty offices and cluttered billboards. Professor Wilson’s office
was again at the end of the hall, and he was there, reading a
journal. John wondered if it was the same one.
“Come on in,” he said at John’s knock.
“I have a couple questions.”
“About the homework set?”
“No, this is unrelated. It’s about quantum cosmology.”
Wilson put his paper down and nodded. “A complex subject. What’s
your question?”
“Do you agree with the Many-Worlds Theory?” John asked.
“No.”
John waited, unsure what to make of the single syllable answer.
Then he said, “Uh, no?”
“No. It’s hogwash in my opinion. What’s your interest in it? Are
you one of my students?” Wilson sported the same gray jacket over
the same blue oxford.
“You don’t believe in multiple universes as an explanation . . .
for . . .” John was at a loss again. He didn’t know as much as he
thought he knew. He still couldn’t ask the right questions.
“For quantum theory?” asked Wilson. “No. It’s not necessary. Do
you know Occam’s Theory?”
John nodded.
“Which is simpler? One universe that moves under statistical laws
at the quantum level or an infinite number of universes each
stemming from every random event? How many universes have you
seen?”
John began to answer the rhetorical question.
“One,” said Wilson before John could open his mouth. Wilson
looked John up and down. “Are you a student here?”
“Uh, no. I’m in high school,” John admitted.
“I see. This is really pretty advanced stuff, young man. Graduate
level stuff. Have you had calculus?”
“Just half a semester.”
“Let me try to explain it another way.” He picked up a
paperweight off his desk, a rock with eyes and mouth painted on it.
“I am going to make a decision to drop this rock between now and ten
seconds from now.” He paused, then dropped the rock after perhaps
seven seconds. “A random process. In ten other universes, assuming
for simplicity that I could only drop the rock at integer seconds
and not fractional seconds, I dropped the rock at each of the
seconds from one to ten. I made ten universes by generating a random
event. By the Many-Worlds Theory, they all exist. The question is,
where did all the matter and energy come from to build ten new
universes just like that?” He snapped his fingers. “Now extrapolate
to the nearly infinite number of quantum transitions happening on
the earth this second. How much energy is required to build all
those universes? Where does it come from? Clearly the Many-Worlds
Theory is absurd.”
John shook his head, trying to get his arms around the idea. He
couldn’t refute Wilson’s argument. He realized how little he really
knew. He said, “But what if multiple worlds did exist? Could you
travel between the worlds?”
“You can’t, you won’t, not even remotely possible.”
“But—”
“It can’t happen, even if the theory were true.”
“Then the theory is wrong,” John said to himself.
“I told you it was wrong. There are no parallel universes.”
John felt the frustration growing in him. “But I know there are.
I’ve seen them.”
“I’d say your observations were manipulated or you saw something
that you interpreted incorrectly.”
“Don’t condescend to me again!” John shouted.
Wilson looked at him calmly, then stood.
“Get out of this office, and I suggest you get off this campus
right now. I recommend that you seek medical attention immediately,”
Wilson said coldly.
John’s frustration turned to rage. Wilson was no different here
than in the last universe. He assumed John was wrong because he
acted like a hick, a farm boy. He was certain John knew nothing that
he didn’t already know.
John flung himself at the man. Wilson’s papers scattered across
his chest and onto the floor. John grabbed at his jacket from across
the desk and yelled into his face, “I’ll prove it to you, goddammit!
I’ll prove it.”
“Get off me,” Wilson yelled and pushed John away. Wilson lost his
balance when John’s grip on his jacket slipped and he fell on the
floor against his chair. “You maniac!”
John stood across from the desk from him, his breathing coming
hard. He needed proof. His eyes saw the diploma on the wall of
Wilson’s office. He grabbed it and ran out of the office. If he
couldn’t convince this Wilson, he’d convince the next. He found an
alcove beside the building and transferred out.
John stood clutching Wilson’s diploma to his chest, his heart
still thumping from the confrontation. Suddenly he felt silly. He’d
attacked the man and stolen his diploma to prove to another version
of him that he wasn’t a wacko.
He looked across the quad. He watched a boy catch a Frisbee, and
then saw juxtaposed the images of him tripping and not catching it,
just missing it to the left, to the right, a million permutations.
Everything in the quad was suddenly a blur.
He shook his head, then lifted the diploma so that he could read
it. He’d try again, and this time he’d try the direct approach.
John climbed the steps to Wilson’s office and knocked.
“Come on in.”
“I have a problem.”
Wilson nodded and asked, “How can I help?”
“I’ve visited you three times. Twice before you wouldn’t believe
me,” John said.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you before,” he said. “You’re not
one of my students, are you?”
“No, I’m not. We’ve never met, but I’ve met versions of you.”
“Really.”
John yelled, “Don’t patronize me! You do that every fucking time,
and I’ve had enough.” His arms were shaking. “I don’t belong in this
universe. I belong in another. Do you understand?”
Wilson’s face was emotionless, still. “No, please explain.”
“I was tricked into using a device. I was tricked by another
version of myself because he wanted my life. He told me I could get
back, but the device either doesn’t work right or only goes in one
direction. I want to get back to my universe, and I need help.”
Wilson nodded. “Why don’t you sit down?”
John nodded, tears welling in his eyes. He’d finally gotten
through to Wilson.
“So you’ve tried talking with me—other versions of me—in other
universes, and I won’t help. Why not?”
“We start by discussing parallel universes or quantum cosmology
or Multi-Worlds Theory, and you end up shooting it all down with
Occam’s Razor.”
“Sounds like something I’d say,” Wilson said, nodding. “So you
have a device.”
“Yeah. It’s here.” John pointed to his chest, then unbuttoned his
shirt.
Wilson looked at the device gravely. “What’s that in your
hand?”
John glanced down at the diploma. “It’s . . . your diploma from
the last universe. I sorta took it for proof.”
Wilson held out his hand, and John handed it over. There was an
identical one on the wall. The professor glanced from one to the
other. “Uh huh,” he said, then after a moment, “I see.”
He put the diploma down and said, “My middle name is
Lawrence.”
John saw that the script of the diploma he’d stolen said “Frank
B. Wilson” while the one on the wall said “Frank L. Wilson.”
“I guess it’s just a difference—”
“Who put you up to this? Was it Greene? This is just the sort of
thing he’d put together.”
Anguish washed over John. “No! This is all real.”
“That device strapped to your chest. Now that’s classic. And the
diploma. Nice touch.”
“Really. This is no hoax.”
“Enough already. I’m on to you. Is Greene in the hall?” Wilson
called through the door. “You can come out now, Charles. I’m on to
you.”
“There is no Charles. There is no Greene,” John said quietly.
“And you must be from the drama department, because you are good.
Two more copies of me! As if the universe can handle one.”
John stood up and walked out of the office, his body suddenly too
heavy.
“Don’t forget the shingle,” Wilson called, holding up the
diploma. John shrugged and continued walking down the hall.
He sat on a bench next to the quad for a long time. The sun set
and the warm summer day vanished along with the kids playing Frisbee
with their shirts tied around their waists.
Finally he stood and walked toward the Student Union. He needed
food. He’d skipped lunch at some point; his stomach was growling at
him. He didn’t feel hungry but his body was demanding food. He just
felt tired.
There was a pizza franchise in the Student Union called Papa
Bob’s. He ordered a small pizza and a Coke, ate it mechanically. It
tasted like cardboard, chewy cardboard.
The Union was desolate as well, all the students driving home or
heading to the dorms for studying and TV. John spotted a pay phone
as he sat pondering what he would do next, whether he should
confront Wilson again. John realized that he should have taken a
picture of the man or demanded he write himself a note. But he would
have told John that it was computer generated or forged.
He walked over to the phone and dialed his number. The phone
demanded seventy-five cents. He inserted the coins and the phone
began to ring.
“Hello?” his mother answered.
“Hello,” he replied.
“Johnny?” she asked, surprised.
“No, could I talk to John please?”
She laughed. “You sound just like him. Gave me a fright, hearing
that, but he’s standing right here. Here he is.”
“Hello?” It was his voice.
“Hi, this is Karl Smith from your English class,” John said
making up a name and a class.
“Yeah?”
“I missed class today, and I was wondering if we had an
assignment.”
“Yeah, we did. We had an essay on the poem we read, Tennyson’s
‘Maud.’ Identify the poetic components, like the last one.”
“Oh, yeah,” John said. The poem was in the same unit as the
Hopkins one. He remembered seeing it. “Thanks.” He hung up the
phone.
This universe seemed just like his own. He could fit right in
here. The thought startled him, and then he asked himself what was
stopping him.
He walked to the bus station and bought a ticket back to
Findlay.
John helped his father around the farm the next day. He took it
as penance for upsetting his parents. They still thought he was
Johnny Farmboy, and so he had to act the part, at least until his
projects started churning.
As they replaced some of the older wood in the fence, John said,
“Dad, I’m going to need to borrow the truck on Saturday night.”
His father paused, a big smile on his face. “Got a big date, do
you?” He said it in such a way that John realized he didn’t think
his son really had a date.
“Yes. I’m taking Casey Nicholson out.”
“Casey?” His father held the plank as John hammered a nail into
it. “Nice girl.”
“Yeah, I’m taking her to a movie at the Bijou.”
“The Bijou?”
“I mean the Strand,” John said, silently yelling at himself for
sharing details that could catch him up. The movie theatre was
always called the Palace, Bijou, or Strand.
“Uh-huh.”
John took the shovel and began shoring up the next post.
“What movie you gonna see?”
Before he could stop himself, he answered, “Does it matter?”
His father paused, then laughed heartily. “Not if you’re in the
balcony, it doesn’t.” John was surprised, then he laughed too.
“Don’t tell your mother I told you, but we used to go to the
Strand all the time. I don’t think we watched a single movie.”
“Dad!” John said. “You guys were . . . make-out artists?”
“Only place we could go to do it,” he said with a grin. “Couldn’t
use this place; your grampa would have beat the tar out of me.
Couldn’t use her place; your other grampa would have shot me.” He
eyed John and nodded. “You’re lucky we live in more liberal
times.”
John laughed, recalling the universe where the free love
expressions of the 60s had never ended, where AIDS had killed a
quarter of the population and syphilis and gonorrhea had been
contracted by 90 percent of the population by 1980. There, dating
involved elaborate chaperone systems and blood tests.
“I know I’m lucky.”
In the early hours of the morning, John slipped across Gurney,
through the Walders’ field and found a place to watch the farm from
the copse of maple trees. He knelt on the soft ground, wondering if
this was where John Prime had waited for him.
John’s arms tingled as he anticipated his course of action. He
was owed a life, he figured. His had been stolen and he was owed
another. He’d wanted his own back, and he’d tried to get it. He’d
researched and questioned and figured, but he couldn’t see any way
back.
So he was ready to settle for second best.
He’d trick the John Rayburn here, just like he’d been tricked.
Tease him with the possibilities. Tickle his curiosity. And if he
wasn’t interested, he’d force him. Knock him out and strap the
device on his chest and send him on.
Let him figure it out like John had. Let him find another
universe to be a part of. John deserved his life back. He’d played
by the rules all his life. He’d been a good kid; he’d loved his
parents. He’d gone to church every Sunday.
He’d been pushed around for too long. John Prime had pushed him
around, Professor Wilson, the cat-dogs. He’d been running and
running and with no purpose. And enough of that. It was time to take
back what had been stolen from him.
Dawn cast a slow red upon the woods. His mother opened the back
door and stepped out into the yard with a basket. He watched her
open the hen house and collect eggs. She was far away, but he
recognized her as his mother instantly. Logically, he knew she
wasn’t his mother, but to his eyes, she was. That was all that
mattered.
His father pecked her lightly on the cheek as he headed for the
barn. He wore heavy boots, thick ones, coveralls, and a John Deere
cap. He entered the barn, started the tractor, and drove toward the
fields. He’d be back for breakfast in an hour, John knew. Bacon,
eggs, toast, and, of course, coffee.
They were his parents. It was his farm. Everything was as he
remembered it. And that was enough for him.
The light in John’s room turned on. John Rayburn was awake. He’d
be coming out soon to do his chores. John waited until this John
went into the barn, then he dashed across the empty pumpkin field
for the barn’s rear door. The rear door was locked, but if you
jiggled it, John knew, it came loose.
John grabbed the handle, listening for sounds from within the
barn, then shook it once for a few seconds. The door held. He
paused, then shook it again and it came open suddenly, loudly. He
slipped into the barn and hid between two rows of stacked bales.
“Hey, Stan-Man. How are you this morning?”
The voice came from near the stalls. This John—he started
thinking of him as John Subprime—was feeding his horse.
“Here’s an apple. How about some oats?”
John crept along the row of bales, then stopped when he could see
the side of John Subprime’s face from across the barn. John was safe
in the shadows, but he needed to get closer to him.
Stan nickered and nuzzled John Subprime’s head, drawing his
tongue across his forehead.
“Stop that,” he said, with a smile.
John Subprime turned his attention to the sheep, and when he did
so, John slipped around the bales and behind the corn picker.
He realized something as he sat in the woods, and his plan had
changed accordingly. John wasn’t a liar. He wasn’t a smooth talker.
He couldn’t do what John Prime had done to him, that is, talk him
into using the device. John would have to do it some other way. And
the only way he could think to do it was the hard way.
John lifted a shovel off a pole next to the corn picker. It was a
short shovel with a flat blade. He figured one blow to the head and
John Subprime would be out cold. Then he’d strap the device to his
chest, toggle the universe counter up one, and then hit the lever
with the end of the shovel. It’d take half the shovel with him, but
that was okay. Then John would finish feeding the animals and go in
for breakfast. No one would ever know.
John ignored the queasy feeling in his stomach. Gripping the
shovel in two hands, he advanced on John Subprime.
John’s faint shadow must have alerted him.
“Dad?” John Subprime said, then turned. “My God!” He shrank away
from the raised shovel, his eyes passing from it to John’s face. His
expression changed from shock to fear.
John’s body strained, the shovel raised above his head.
John Subprime leaned against the sheep pen, one arm raised, the
other . . .
He had only one arm.
Nausea washed through John’s body and he dropped the shovel. It
clattered on the wood floor of the barn, settled at John Subprime’s
feet.
“What am I doing?” he cried. His stomach heaved, but nothing came
up but a yellow bile that he spat on the floor. He heaved again at
the smell of it.
He was no better than John Prime. He didn’t deserve a life.
John staggered to the back door of the barn.
“Wait!”
He ran across the field. Something grabbed at his feet and he
fell. He pulled his foot free and ran into the woods.
“Wait! Don’t run!”
John turned to see John Subprime running after him, just one arm,
the right, pumping. He slowed twenty feet in front of John, then
stopped, his hand extended.
“You’re me,” he said. “Only you have both arms.”
John nodded, his breath too ragged, his stomach too tense to
speak. Tears were welling in his eyes as he looked at the man he had
contemplated clubbing.
“How can that be?”
John found his voice. “I’m a version of you.”
John Subprime nodded vigorously. “Only you never lost your
arm!”
“No, I never lost it.” John nodded his head. “How did it
happen?”
John Subprime grimaced. “Pitchfork. I was helping dad in the barn
loft. I lost my balance, fell. The pitchfork caught my bicep, sliced
it. . . .”
“I remember.” In John’s universe, he’d been twelve, and he had
fallen from the loft while he and his father loaded it with hay. He
had thought he could carry the bale, but he hadn’t been strong
enough and he’d fallen to the farm yard, knocking the wind out of
himself, bumping the pitchfork over as he fell. The pitchfork had
landed next to him, nicking his shoulder. His father had looked on
in horror and then anger. The scolding from his mother had been
worse than the nick. “I just got a cut on my shoulder.”
John Subprime laughed. “In one world, I lose my arm, and in
another I get a scratch. Don’t that beat all.” Why was he laughing?
Didn’t he realize that John had meant to steal his life?
“Yeah.”
“Why don’t you come inside and have some breakfast?”
John looked at him, unsure of how he could ask that. He yelled,
“I was going to steal your life!”
John Subprime nodded. “Is that why you had the shovel? Then you
saw my arm. No way you could steal my life. You’ve got two arms.” He
laughed.
“It wasn’t just that,” John said. “I couldn’t bring myself to
hurt . . .”
“Yeah, I know.”
“How could you possibly?” John yelled. “I’ve lost everything!” He
reached into his shirt and toggled the universe counter. “I’m sorry,
but I have to leave.”
“No. Wait!” John Subprime yelled.
John backed away and pulled the lever.
The world blurred and John Subprime blinked away.
There was the barn and the farmhouse, and off in the distance his
father on the tractor. Another universe where he didn’t belong. He
toggled the device and pulled the lever. Again the farmhouse. He
didn’t belong here either. Again he moved forward through the
universes. The farmhouse was gone. And again. Then it was there, but
green instead of red. He toggled it again and again, wanting to get
as far away from his contemplated crime as possible.
The clouds flew around in chaotic fast motion. The trees he stood
in were sometimes there, sometimes not. The farmhouse bounced left
and right a foot, a half foot. The barn more, sometimes behind the
house, sometimes to the east of it. The land was the one constant, a
gently sloping field. Once he found himself facing the aluminum
siding of a house. And then it was gone as he transferred out.
A hundred times, he must have transferred through universe after
universe where he didn’t belong until finally he stopped and
collapsed to the ground, sobbing.
He’d lost his life. He’d lost it all, and he’d never get it
back.
He rested his head against the trunk of a maple and closed his
eyes. After the tears were gone, after his breathing had slowed, he
slept, exhausted.
“Hey there, fella. Time to get up.”
Someone poked him. John looked up into his father’s face.
“Dad?”
“Not unless my wife’s been hiding something from me.” He offered
a hand, and John pulled himself up. John was in the copse of maples,
his father from this universe standing beside him, holding a walking
stick. He didn’t recognize John.
“Sorry for sleeping here in your woods. Got tired.”
“Yeah. It’ll happen.” He pointed toward Gurney with his stick.
“Better be heading along. The town’s that way.” He pointed north.
“About two miles.”
“Yes, sir.” John began walking. Then he stopped. His father
hadn’t recognized him. Which meant what? John wasn’t sure. He turned
back to him. “Sir, I could use some lunch. If you have extra. I
could work it off.”
Bill Rayburn—John forced himself to use the name in his head.
This man was not his father—checked his watch, then nodded. “Lunch
in a few minutes, my watch and my stomach tell me. Cold cuts. As to
working it off, no need.”
“That’s fine.”
“What’s your name?”
“John . . . John Wilson.” He took Professor Wilson’s last name
spontaneously.
John turned and followed Bill across the pumpkin field toward the
house. The pumpkins were still on the vine, unpicked and just a week
until Halloween. Some of them were already going bad. He passed a
large one with its top caved in, a swarm of gnats boiling out of
it.
He remembered the joke his father had told him a week ago.
“How do you fix a broken jack-o’-lantern?” he asked.
Bill turned and glanced at him as if he were a darn fool.
“I don’t know.”
“With a pumpkin patch,” John replied, his face straight.
Bill stopped, looked at him for a moment, then a small smile
crept across his lips. “I’ll have to remember that one.”
The barn was behind the house, smaller than he remembered and in
need of paint. There was a hole in the roof that should have been
patched. In fact the farm seemed just a bit more decrepit than he
remembered. Had hard times fallen on his parents here?
“Janet, another one for lunch,” Bill called as he opened the back
door. “Leave your shoes.”
John took his shoes off, left them where he always did. He hung
his bag on a hook. It was a different hook, brass and molded, where
he remembered a row of dowels that he and his father had glued into
the sideboard.
John could tell Janet wasn’t keen on a stranger for lunch, but
she didn’t say anything, and she wouldn’t until she and Bill were
alone. John smiled at her, thanked her for letting him have
lunch.
She wore the same apron he remembered. No, he realized. She’d
worn this one, with a red check pattern and deep pockets in front,
when he was younger.
She served John a turkey sandwich, with a slice of cheese on it.
He thanked her again as she did, and ate the sandwich slowly. Janet
had not recognized him either.
Bill said to Janet, “Got some good apples for cider, I think, a
few bushels.”
John raised his eyebrows at that. He and his father could get a
couple bushels per tree. Maybe the orchard was smaller here. Or
maybe it had been hit with blight. He glanced at Bill and saw the
shake in his hand. He’d never realized how old his father was, or
maybe he had aged more quickly in this universe for reasons unknown.
Maybe a few bushels was all he could gather.
“I should work on the drainage in the far field tomorrow. I’ve
got a lake there now and it’s going to rot my seed next season.” The
far field had always been a problem, the middle lower than the
edges, a pond in the making.
“You need to pick those pumpkins too, before they go bad,” John
said suddenly.
Bill looked at him.
“What do you know of farming?”
John swallowed his bite of sandwich, angry at himself for drawing
the man’s resentment. John knew better than to pretend farm another
farmer’s fields.
“Uh, I grew up on a farm like this. We grew pumpkins, sold them
before Halloween and got a good price for them. You’ll have to throw
half your crop away if you wait until Sunday, and then who’ll buy
that late?”
Janet said to Bill, “You’ve been meaning to pick those
pumpkins.”
“Practically too late now,” Bill said. “The young man’s right.
Half the crop’s bad.”
“I could help you pick them this afternoon.” John said it because
he wanted to spend more time there. It was the first chance he’d had
in a long time to relax. They weren’t his parents; he knew that. But
they were good people.
Bill eyed him again appraisingly.
“You worked a farm like this, you say. What else you know how to
do?”
“I can pick apples. I can lay wood shingles for that hole in your
barn.”
“You been meaning to do that too, Bill,” Janet said. She was
warming to him.
“It’s hard getting that high up, and I have a few other
priorities,” he said. He looked back at John. “We’ll try you out for
the day, for lunch and dinner and three dollars an hour. If it isn’t
working out, you hit the road at sundown, no complaining.”
John said, “Deal.”
“Janet, call McHenry and ask him if he needs another load of
pumpkins and if he wants me to drop ’em off tonight.”
John waited outside the County Clerk’s window, his rage mounting.
How damn long did it take to hand over a marriage certificate? Casey
was waiting for him outside the judge’s chamber, nine months
pregnant. If the man behind the glass wall took any longer, the kid
was going to be born a bastard. And Casey’s and his parents had been
adamant about that. No bastard. He’d said he’d take care of the kid
and he meant it, but they wanted it official.
Finally the clerk handed over the license and the two notarized
blood tests and John snatched them from his hand.
“Thanks,” he said, turning and heading for the court
building.
After the wedding he and Casey were driving up to Toledo to
honeymoon on the last of his cash. In a week he was scheduled to
start his GE job. He was going to work one of the assembly lines,
but that was just until the book he was writing—The
Shining—took off.
The trip to Toledo served the purpose of the honeymoon, as well
as the fact that he had meetings regarding the screwed-up Rubik’s
Cube. It still irked him. The patent search had turned up nothing
and they had built a design, one that finally worked, and they’d
sunk $95,000 into a production run. Then they’d gotten a call from
the lawyer in Belgium. Apparently there was a patent filed in
Hungary by that bastard Rubik. The company Rubik had hired in New
York to market the things had gone under and he’d never bothered to
try again. Someone had gotten wind of their product and now they
wanted a piece of the deal.
The lawyer had wanted to drop him like a hot potato, but he’d
convinced him that there was still cash to be made from it. Some
cash at least. He’d have to pay a licensing fee probably. Kiss some
ass. But there was money to be made. He’d stick it out with John,
though the retainer was just about gone.
Casey waved as he rounded the corner on the third floor in front
of the judge’s office. Casey sat on a bench, her belly seeming to
rest on her knees. Her face was puffy and pink, as if someone had
pumped her with saline.
“Hi, Johnny,” she said. “Did you get the paper?”
He hated being called Johnny and he’d told her that, but she
still did it. Everybody used to call Johnny Farmboy Johnny so he was
stuck with it. Some things just couldn’t be changed.
He put on a smile and waved the certificate. “Yeah,” he said.
“Everything’s ready.” He kissed Casey on the cheek. “Darling, you
look radiant.” He’d be glad once the baby was out of her body; then
she could start dressing the way he liked again. He hoped her
cheerleading uniform still fit.
The ceremony was quick, though Casey had to dab her eyes. John
wasn’t surprised that none of Casey’s friends were there. Getting
pregnant had put a lot of stress on her relationships. Field hockey
had been right out.
The judge signed the certificate and it was done. John was glad
Casey’s and his parents hadn’t come. They’d wanted to, but John had
axed that request. They had settled for a reception after the baby
was born.
He knew his parents were disappointed in what had happened, and
John hadn’t wanted to face them during the ceremony. They’d wanted
him to go to college, to better himself. But those were the dreams
they had for Johnny Farmboy. He was a completely different
thing.
They’d understand once the money started rolling in. They’d not
be disappointed in their son any more.
John slowly lowered Casey into the bucket seat of the Trans Am, a
splurge with the last of his cash. He had to have decent wheels. The
Trans Am pulled away and he headed for Route 16. “Glad that’s over
with,” he said.
“Really?” Casey asked.
“Well, I’m glad it’s over with and we’re married now,” he said
quickly.
“Yeah, I know what you mean.”
John nodded. He had to be careful what he said with Casey, what
he shared. About the time she’d started showing and they’d had to
tell their parents, John had wished he had the device, wished he
could jump to the next universe and start over. John realized he
should have killed Johnny Farmboy, hidden the body, and kept the
device. Now the Cube had to work right. With his money almost gone,
he might not have another chance, no matter how good an idea the
AbCruncher was. He’d wanted to come clean and tell Casey all about
his past, but he didn’t dare. How could she believe him?
He was stuck here and he had to make it work. There were no other
choices now. This was the life he’d chosen. He patted Casey’s leg
and smiled at her. He’d make some money, enough to set her and the
kid up, and then he’d have his freedom to do what he wanted with his
life. It would take a little longer now; there were some bumps in
the road, but he’d succeed. He was Johnny Prime.
* * *
Spring had arrived, but without the sun on his shoulders, John
was chilly. He’d started working on the car in the morning and the
sun had been on him, and now, after lunch, it was downright cold. He
considered getting the tractor out and hauling the beat-up Trans Am
into the sun. He finally decided it was too much trouble. It was
late and there was no way he’d get the carburetor back together
before dinner.
He’d bought the car for fifty dollars, but the car had yet to
start. He’d need it soon. He started a second shift job at the GE
plant in May. And then in the fall he was taking classes at the
University of Toledo.
He’d applied to the University of Toledo’s continuing education
program. He couldn’t enroll as a traditional freshman, which was all
right with him, because of the fact that he’d taken the GED instead
of graduating from high school. He wouldn’t get into the stuff he
wanted to learn until his senior year: quantum field theory,
cosmology, general relativity. That was all right. He was okay where
he was for the time being. If he didn’t think about home, he could
keep going.
With the plant job, washing machine assembly line work from four
until midnight, he’d have enough for tuition for the year. Plus Bill
and Janet were still paying him three an hour for chores he was
helping out with. He noted ironically to himself that in his own
universe he wouldn’t have been paid a dime. In September he’d get
another job for pocket money and rent near the university.
He set the carburetor on the front seat and rolled the car back
into the barn. This was a good universe, John had decided, but he
wasn’t staying. No, he was happy with Bill and Janet taking him in.
They were kind and generous, just like his own parents in nearly
every respect, but he couldn’t stay here. Not for the long term.
The universe was a mansion with a million rooms. People didn’t
know they were in just one room. They didn’t know there was a way
through the walls to other rooms.
But John did. He knew there were walls. And he knew something
else too. He knew walls came down. There were holes between
worlds.
John had listed his major as physics, and he’d laughed when the
manila envelope from the department had arrived, welcoming him and
listing his faculty advisor as Dr. Frank Wilson. Professor Wilson’s
world was going to shatter one day, and John was going to do it for
him.
John knew something that no other physicist in this world knew. A
human could pass through the walls of the universe. Just knowing
that it was possible, just knowing, without a bit of doubt—he needed
only to pull up his pant leg and look at the scars from the cat-dog
bite—that there were a million universes out there, was all it would
take for John to figure the science of it out.
That was his goal. He had the device and he had his knowledge.
He’d reverse engineer it, take it apart, ask the questions of the
masters in the field, he would himself become one of those masters,
to find out how it was done.
And then, once the secrets of the universe lay open to him, he
would go back and he would kick the shit out of John Prime.
He smiled as he shut the barn door.