'The Replica'

by Ferro Gabro

Smashwords Edition
Copyright © Ferro Gabro 2010

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'The Replica'

Our simultaneous collapse into the clutches of infatuation started only moments after we met. From the following day we already needed to see each other regularly. Our relationship started quickly, effortlessly and without any resistance.
Friction soon became a necessary part of our interaction. We fought a lot but continued to live together mostly happily, until one day when both of us subconsciously realized that the love that had been so strong between us at one stage had finally reached its expiry date.
Contradictory to the way we had met, the termination of what we once called 'us' was a tedious process. It was one of those extended, painful tortures which only young lovers are able to submit themselves to. We didn’t want to admit that it was over, that our love was a failure.
Now that I look back at the conclusion of our time together I realize that it was fear that kept us connected during the separation - the time of letting go. Both of us were scared that we would also be considered as failures on that day when we finally said the last farewell and stepped away from the number one spot in each other's lives.
We believed in so many things during those years we spent as a couple. One of the ideals both of us strived for was to live in peace with ourselves and others. Why had it then become so difficult to live amicably together? Weren’t we supposed to love each other more than all other people on earth? Why and how did that change so subtly over time?
I now believe that both of us were still looking for love, although we didn’t realize that we had actually already found it in each other. Our age made us doubt.
'You are too young,' age said. 
That warning convinced us to wait, to be dissatisfied with each other.
'The future will bring you someone better,' age whispered, further strengthening our hesitation to continue our lives together.
There was only one problem: I couldn’t picture a life without Julia. Just thinking about it filled me with a sadness that instantly spread through my whole being. That feeling was accompanied by cold fear, followed by immense anxiety to be alone. It was unthinkable to be rejected by, as I believed then, the first and only person I had ever really loved romantically. I knew she also felt the same way about me. She had assured me numerous times that she had also never felt like that about anyone else.
Surprise was one of the more pleasant emotions I experienced on the day when I realized we were saying our last farewell. Although it was busy happening I was unwilling to accept it. I didn’t want to admit that it was reality. How can you let the love of your life slip away so easily after six years together? Especially after you had invested so many emotions and time to try and make it work.
How was I supposed to continue with my life on my own? For a very long time it had no longer been only me, it had become us. We had merged and became a part of each other. When I saw her leave a piece of me also disappeared. I believed that I would never see her nor that part of myself again.
I felt robbed. What Julia had stolen from me was trust. How would I ever manage to believe a woman again when she told me she loved me? Especially when eternal love could come to such a sudden and painful end.
After her departure from my life I was destroyed. I knew I was still alive but the real me had faded away. It stood in the shadows, obscured from view. My emotions were so confused that I often believed that it actually belonged to someone else. But unfortunately it was still part of me. I repeatedly tried to sever myself from my feelings. I desired to put some distance between me and those unwelcome emotions. I wanted to run away to a place where it couldn’t follow me. Once in a while I succeeded to evade them, but only for brief moments of escape.
The omnipresent sadness that had invaded me was later joined by anger. At first it wasn’t too strong, was kept under the surface by my feelings of loss. But gradually it grew into something immense and furious. It raged within me, stormed around like a barbed wire tornado. After a while the pain and anger became so overwhelming that I had to switch it off to survive.
This wasn’t easy to achieve. My natural emotional defense mechanisms took their time before they started protecting me, as if they wanted me to go into complete emotional shock before they would allow me to shut down.
One afternoon while I was busy switching off the computer it asked me: 'Do you want to shut down now?' I chose yes. Moments later the machine was off. I immediately wondered if the same procedure couldn’t be applied to one's life.
Thus I found the answer to the discontinuation of my emotional torment. It was simple: just shut down completely. Become like a computer. In that way one could decide for yourself when - if ever - you wanted to feel anything again. On that day one could just switch your feelings back on. But I knew that the situation would have to be perfect for a complete restart. Otherwise I was destined to live the life of a typical neutral human being. I chose to become like a machine and lived in that manner from that day onward.
At the beginning neutrality was new to me. During my relationship with Julia I experienced both extreme highs and lows, rarely any form of neutrality. I became so used to the intensity of that emotional life that I considered it as normal. Julia had taught me to accept that strange balance between complete happiness which I sometimes felt in her presence and the familiar experience of personal annihilation that she often subjected me to.
Although neutrality provided me with safety and a degree of comfort I realized after some time that something was missing in my life. Was it love? And if that was it, was it love for a woman, or love in general, for myself, others and life? Or did I simply miss the presence of a multitude of normal emotions? I started wondering if it was really necessary for a human being to be exposed to different, sometimes conflicting emotions on a daily basis.
Months later, after a long and difficult time of consideration, I decided to go and see a psychologist. It was the first time in my life I would go and see someone like that. I had my doubts about the intended visit and decided to keep it secret. If none of my acquaintances knew about my appointment nobody would ask questions about my mental and emotional health.
'There is nothing wrong with me,' was one of the first things I said to the receptionist. 'I just want to talk to someone who can understand.'
'Of course. You don’t have to explain that to me. Most of Doc's patients are healthy, they just lack communication in their lives,' the friendly woman said.
I made the appointment for the next week.
In my car on the way to the doctor I was overcome by nervousness. I nearly turned around. What was I going to tell the shrink? That I missed my previous girlfriend? That I couldn’t live without her? How pathetic.
For some reason I continued driving. I stopped outside the doctor's consulting rooms and forced myself to go in. The genuine smile on the receptionist's pretty face put me at ease immediately.
'Please fill in this form,' she said and handed it to me. 'Can I offer you something to drink?'
'No thanks,' I lied. Actually my mouth was as dry as hot desert sand.
'Please have a seat. Doc will see you as soon as you have finished filling in that form.'
I completed the form and returned it to the receptionist.
'Doc is just busy on the phone. You can go in as soon as he stops talking,' she said and looked at the switchboard.
I sat down again and listened to the soft classical music that played in the peach colored waiting room. The walls were decorated with various artworks and photos of animals and nature. It was obvious that the doctor wanted to create a relaxed atmosphere. On the coffee table in front of me I saw the covers of various magazines. One was called Amateur Scientist. I had never heard of it before.
Those science magazines looked out of place in that room. Out of curiosity I picked one up and started paging through it. It was clear that the articles were closer to science fiction than to real science. One article dealt with a new mobile phone that was designed by a famous scientist that I didn’t know. What made the phone unique was that it couldn’t be used to speak to people on earth. It was invented to communicate exclusively with inhabitants of a planet called Zurgomba. The scientist was of course the only earthling that could understand Zurgombian. On top of that the Zurgombians also didn’t trust any other humans. They were only willing to communicate with that one special scientist.
One other article described the life of a dog with an iron heart and another told the story of a woman with a computer brain. Her human brain had been completely replaced by an electronic one. Apparently her thoughts were much more logical than before. She was even able to read roadmaps. Her husband was very impressed that she no longer got lost so easily.
Just before I was able to read an article about a robotic woman, I was invited to enter the doctor's consulting room. I put the magazine down and walked to the closed door. There I stopped, uncertain of what to do.
'Just enter. He's expecting you,' the receptionist said.
I pushed the door open and entered a spacious room. The doctor sat behind a huge wooden desk. The first thing that struck me was his age. He must have been at least eighty, if not older. I was surprised that he was still working at that advanced age. Maybe he was a workaholic and continued to work in order to stay focused.
He stared at me through the thick lenses of his glasses without saying a word or uttering any other sound. He moved his right hand slowly over his bald head as if he was thinking of something important. Although he looked at me directly it was difficult to determine if he was aware of my presence. I decided to greet him first. He greeted me back in a friendly way.
'You are going to get tired if you stand the whole time,' he said. 'Why don’t you sit down over there on a chair?'
Although I found his offer to sit on a chair strange I immediately accepted it. I briefly wondered if he would have expected me to sit on the floor if he didn’t offer me a chair. Maybe it was a test to see if I was normal, but I wasn’t sure.
After I sat down, there was silence again. He looked thoughtfully at me. What he tried to see in me was a mystery. He spoke again only moments before I started feeling uncomfortable.
'What is wrong with you?' he asked.
'Wrong?' I said, uncertain what he meant.
'You see, usually people come to me knowing what it is that bothers them. They also actually already know how to solve it. All they really need to do is to share their imaginary ailment with someone else. Many people believe that I am a wise old man and that I would immediately see what's wrong in their lives. As soon as I confirm that I also notice their problem they instantly start feeling better. So I have to warn you. As you have already noticed, I am old. If age brought me wisdom is another question, one even I don’t have an answer for yet. All I can really offer you is to listen. So tell me your story, I have a lot of time. Well, actually just a little bit less than an hour, until the end of your session. But remember, there can always be a next session if you require another one. If after you have spoken you want my opinion I will willingly give it. But if you don’t like honesty I would suggest that you do all the talking. You are welcome to start as soon as you're ready. Oh yes, one last thing. I don’t expect you to call me doctor.'
I liked his approach. If he was willing to be honest with me I decided to share my current situation with him as honestly as possible. For a few moments I wondered where to start.
'You are completely right by saying that I know what's bothering me. Actually it's very simple. It's a woman. Or should I say, was? She's no longer part of my daily existence. The problem is that I don’t know how to finally let go of her. Although I suppress it, some feelings and thoughts about her still slip through my net into my consciousness. I often think that it's because I don’t really want to forget her. I'm struggling to accept that the time I spent with her has really ended, even though I know it has. I find it difficult to acknowledge that we will never be lovers or friends again. I can’t believe I'll never see her again, because she remains part of me. For some reason I can’t finally greet her. Emotionally I struggle to let her go in order to start looking for another woman.'
I stopped talking and was quiet for a few moments while I thought about what I had just said.
'Maybe it's exactly what I need. Something or somebody who can replace her. The question is just what. Or should I say who?'
For the rest of my session I described my relationship with Julia in more detail. The doctor didn’t say much. Once in a while he only asked a leading question. He encouraged me to elaborate on certain aspects of our affair. I did most of the talking. It was like a monologue of memories.
I was surprised that I was able to remember certain parts of our relationship. Some memories were very clear, close to me, while others were distant, hidden. Not all the shrouded memories were painful and I didn't understand why they were hiding. Some actually reminded me of a few of the best times I ever spent with Julia. While I was busy remembering our relationship out loud, I realized that I was making peace with many aspects of it.
One thing I told the doctor that still remained within my heart was the missing. Some nights I had such vivid dreams about Julia that it was difficult to believe that it wasn’t reality when I woke up. Then I always reached out to the place where she previously slept, but she was no longer there. What I found strange were the remnants of her that still lay there next to me on her empty place. It was as if a part of her was really still there with me.
The clock against the wall showed that my hour was over. It had passed very quickly.
'You'll have to come back next week. It's obvious that you haven’t finished your story yet. What you can do in the meantime is to think again about everything you told me today. Try to link your thoughts to emotions. Make those feelings as specific and intense as possible, even if it is difficult to experience it again. Have a nice day. See you next week.'
For the next seven days I thought continuously and obsessively about Julia. Sometimes I even thought about her while I was busy talking to someone else. In the mornings before I was completely awake my brain was already filled with thoughts of our failed relationship. During lunch my head was crowded with memories. Even at night I tried to understand what went wrong in my dreams.
During my next session at the psychologist I had even more to say. I spoke incessantly. When my hour was over it felt as if I had only started speaking. There was still so much more to tell that I was disappointed when I had to leave the consultation room. I knew I had to wait another week until I could share the rest of it with Doc. It sounded like a very long time.
In that way weeks sped by. Endless thoughts about Julia were followed by a session at the shrink. Then another week of ceaseless thoughts and memories. Then back to the doctor again. It was a new cycle.
In time I was able to connect certain emotions to selected thoughts. Initially I was scared to feel too much. I was still unwilling to sacrifice the security of my neutral life. Wouldn’t some feelings attempt to destroy me?
Three months passed like that. One day I no longer had anything left to say to the doctor. I had finished telling the story of Julia and I. I no longer had words with which to continue.
'Is that all you wanted to tell me?' he said once I stopped talking.
'Yes.'
'Are you interested to hear what I think?'
'Certainly.'
'Remember, it's just a suggestion. Listen to it and then decide for yourself what you want to do about it.'
'I'm listening.'
'Good. During your first session you already found the answer to the solution of your current problem. That doesn’t mean that the subsequent sessions were unnecessary. Those follow-up sessions were very important for your thoughts and emotions as related to the relationship. It gave you the opportunity to make your inner world concrete, to bring the mysterious into the open and make it more understandable. I notice that you are struggling to remember what you said during that first session. That's to be understood. So many other things have been said since then. Do you want me to remind you?'
'Please.'
'It's very simple. You said that you should replace Julia with something or someone else. That is your answer right there.'
'It sounds too simple.'
'Remember, often the solution to a problem is much less complicated than expected. Yet, to find the right substitute in this case might be a bit more problematic. Once again it is only you who can decide who or what to use as replacement for the emptiness Julia left in your life after she left. You have many options. A new hobby always helps, or a journey abroad. You can even join a club in which you are interested. It's always easy to meet people like that. Do you have any ideas?'
'No, not really. I have thought about it a lot but haven’t found anything so far.'
'Can I make a suggestion?'
'Yes, of course.'
'Replace her with another woman.'
'Another woman? No, that's the last option I would consider. I'm not ready for that yet.'
'What are you saying? Are you still scared to get emotionally involved with someone else?'
'Yes. I'm sure that I'm not ready to handle the pain of another rejection just yet.'
'I'm glad you said that. Imagine that it was possible to control the woman. Then she would never even consider rejecting you.'
'I don’t understand what you're saying. No man has ever really controlled a woman.'
'You are, of course, completely right when you say that. But then you are talking about human women.'
'Sure. Is there any other kind of woman?'
'There are many things on this planet that you are not aware of yet. The time we live in is filled with possibilities many people have not even considered. To listen to what I want to tell you you'll have to adjust your view of reality a bit though. I call it reality replacement. It's an easy thing to do. All that is required of you is to replace that which you considered as reality until now with an illusion. The only difference is that this illusion is real. You'll only really understand what I'm talking about when you try what I suggest for yourself. So let's return to your situation. You are looking for a woman, but one that can’t cause you pain. Am I right?'
'Yes, that's exactly it.'
'You want a woman that won’t mind when you go and have a few drinks after work with your friends, one that would watch sport with you on weekends, who can cook but also stimulate you mentally. You want someone to communicate with emotionally and physically. You know exactly what I'm talking about.'
'Yes, you're right, but do women like the one you just described really exist?'
'Definitely.'
'You must be joking. Where can I meet one?'
'It's not really that difficult. You don’t even have to do much. All that is required of you is to order one.'
'Order? Oh, now I understand. I have heard about the websites where you can order a bride from a poor country. Apparently they are all pretty and pleasant, just grateful for being given the opportunity to escape from their countries.'
'No, that's not what I'm talking about. It's quite different from that. These women I'm referring to get delivered to your house. Well, that's if you order one of the older, cheaper models. If you decide on the latest release she can even drive to your house on her own.'
'I still don’t understand how this works.'
'You will. It's the complete solution and end of difficult relationships. It's the future and it's here right now. These women are fully functional. I'll guarantee you'll enjoy their presence more than any other woman's until now. All you need to do is to phone this place,' he said and handed me a brochure of Models Unlimited. 'All they need is her specifications. Simple things like the color of her hair and eyes, her length, even her personality. You can also provide much more specific details than that. What you wish for they supply. You'll be surprised how perfect the woman will be they send to you. As your doctor I strongly suggest that you follow my advice. It will help tremendously in your recovery. Try it and call me again in a month to tell me how everything is going.'
'Is this place legal?'
'Yes, of course. Well, let me put it this way, it's not completely illegal. Although many men are using this service most people are not aware of it yet. Models Unlimited doesn’t advertise in newspapers or on television or radio. They believe that the service they provide is so important that the word about it should only be spread by satisfied customers. I've told you about it now so you can decide for yourself if you're interested. If you order a woman and you're not satisfied with her you can at least say that you tried it. And if, on the other hand, you are satisfied with a Models Unlimited woman I can assure you that you won’t soon again need another woman.'
'How do these women differ from other women?'
'Read the brochure. They state that they are specialists in reality replacement. They replace your specific reality with a self designed illusion. But it's an illusion that is in many ways more real than reality. In fact, it's an improvement on reality. They give you a woman without the shortcomings of a normal woman. What more than that can any man ask for?'
'But aren’t these women human?'
'In behavior these women are more human than human women. But if you want to get technical about it they are actually robots.'
'Robots?' I asked. I started wondering if the doctor didn’t need a psychologist that could lead him back to accepted reality. How could he, as a registered psychologist, expect of me to get involved with a robotic woman? It was absurd. From the start it would immediately feel unreal. Even if she looked exactly like a real woman and other people didn’t realize that she was a machine I would still know it. I knew it would be like living a lie. Even though I needed a woman I couldn’t accept the doctor's solution.
'You look confused,' he said.
'Yes, I am.'
'I know the feeling. When I found out about Models Unlimited I couldn’t understand how any sane person could be interested in a mechanical woman. I wondered how any man could willingly turn his back on the world of real women and replace the warmth of a human relationship with that of a machine. That's why I already mentioned that you will have to adapt your current view of reality. If you succeed in doing that you'll soon be unable to believe that you had never pictured reality differently. You'll be relieved and impressed with this illusion. It will give you a completely new reality. It can help you to start a new life.'
'It's just the idea that it's a machine that I find strange.'
'Believe me, you haven’t yet seen what the anatomical engineers at Models Unlimited have achieved. Don’t ask me about the mechanical specifications of these women. That information you'll have to obtain from Models Unlimited. But if you want to know something about the final product I can tell you a lot. Just a moment. Let me demonstrate.'
The doctor ordered his receptionist to his office.
'You've already known Monique for three months, have had many conversations with her while you waited for your appointment. What do you think, is she human or a machine?'
'Human, of course,' I said immediately, without hesitation.
'Wrong answer. She's the latest receptionist model. She's a considerate improvement on the previous version. Monique is more professional, friendlier, more reliable, able and even cheaper than any receptionist I've ever had, and that includes the human ones.'
'You must be kidding. I can’t believe it.'
'Believe it. You're witnessing an example of a futuristic woman. Take her hand.'
I was hesitant but curious to know what her hand would feel like. I reached out and took her hand in mine. It was soft and warm. There was no difference between her hand and the hand of a real woman.
'Feel her pulse,' Doc said.
She really had a heartbeat. I was stunned.
'Maybe now you understand better why I want you to read that brochure. Get more information and then decide for yourself what you want to do. It definitely changed my life. I believe it can do the same for you. You really don’t have much to lose.'
'I'll have to go and think about it, Doc. It's a bit overwhelming.'
'That's a wise approach. Take your time. One's view of reality doesn’t change instantly. But I'm convinced that you are going to contact Models Unlimited as soon as you are ready for a woman in your life.'
'Just one last question. How much do you pay for this service?'
'Much less than a real woman, that I can assure you of.'
'That's good news. Thanks Doc.'
'You should only thank yourself. Enjoy your new future. And remember to contact me whenever you feel like talking. Have a nice day.'
'The same to you. See you again.'
On my way outside I looked at Monique again. I compared her to the photos of the other models in the brochure. They all looked perfect. What made it even better was that they were all available. It still seemed unbelievable.
I still didn’t fully understand what Models Unlimited involved. What I did know was that it would be pleasant and interesting to have a woman in my life again. But something inside me made me hesitate to order one. Wouldn’t this type of relationship just complicate things instead of simplifying it?
I decided to phone Models Unlimited in order to gather more information. In my car I immediately switched on my mobile phone. I punched the number into the keypad and pressed the green button. After only one ring my call was answered. It was a female voice - one of the most beautiful I had ever heard.
'Good morning. I am interested in ordering a woman from you, but I first want to learn more about the different options you have available.'
'If you want to get to know one of the most perfect, intelligent and pleasant companions, you have reached the right place. How did you find out about us?'
I mentioned Doc's name.
'Of course. Doc is one of our oldest and most loyal clients. He always says that we see him so often because he loves change so much. Since he recommended us to you we will take special care of your needs. If you want to have a live display of our models I would suggest that you come to our offices. If, on the other hand, you only want to read more about our services you can visit our website. Have you seen our online information portal?'
'No, I haven’t had the opportunity yet.'
'The web address is www.modelsunlimited.com. Do you wish to gather more information first or are you ready to order your future companion immediately?'
'I want to visit your website first. Just tell me, what time does your showroom close?'
'We never close. Our service is a full-time one, open during the day and night, the week or on weekends. You can phone whenever it is convenient for you, whether it's today, next week or next month. There will always be a friendly voice here to assist you. Let me just remind you of something. Our women are better than reality. We have taken all the positive qualities of different women, improved it and have included all of it in our latest software that is installed in our models. Our latest operating system is flawless. You can expect the best woman ever and what we provide will exceed your expectations.'
'Thanks for the information. What is your name?'
'Chloe.'
'Enjoy the rest of your day, Chloe. I'll contact you as soon as I'm ready to order.'
I rushed back home. It was the first time in months that I felt excited about something. I immediately visited the website after arrival. There was a detailed explanation of how the company operated, including the history and prices of their service. 
A complete list of options to the client was provided. You had two options. Firstly it was possible to choose one of the existing models in the online catalogue. All types of women were available - short, tall, blonde, brunette, white, black, whatever you could imagine. Most of them looked like supermodels. There were also some normal women, but they were a minority.
The second option one had was to create your own woman. All Models Unlimited needed to start creating your custom-made model was a photo of the way you wanted her to look. If you didn’t have a photo you were invited to visit their design studio. There a representative would assist you in creating a computer image of your dream woman. That picture would then be used as blueprint for assembling your companion.
The second option was of course the more expensive one. But even with regards to payment, Models Unlimited was very accommodating. You could choose the length of the term in which you wanted to pay for your new woman. The first month was the cheapest. If you were not completely satisfied with your order you could return it within that period and either choose another model or void the contract with the company without any further financial obligations on your part.
Initially I was so excited about the prospect of having a woman in my life again that I nearly ordered one immediately. All the doubts I experienced earlier had vanished. I believed that she would be a welcome substitute for the boredom and loneliness I had been subjected to since Julia's departure. The whole process, including the price, seemed so simple and inviting. It was difficult to resist the offer.
But although it all looked so easy I wasn’t finally able to place the order. I was unable to get the picture of me walking with a robot woman in the park out of my head. Even though I had held the soft and warm hand of Monique I was unable to remove the image of a cold metallic machine from my head. It was so confusing. I knew she was a machine, but her heartbeat felt real and she even smelled human.
It took another month before I eventually decided to order a woman. During that time I visited the website daily. I phoned Models Unlimited very often and asked Chloe numerous questions. I also sent electronic mail in which I requested more details of the functioning of a Models Unlimited woman. All my questions were answered satisfactorily.
Everybody was sympathetic and understood my uncertainty. Chloe assured me that most potential new clients shared my concerns and hesitation. According to her it had a lot to do with the view of reality that had been impressed on me by the establishment since birth. She never put any pressure on me to let go of that reality, only encouraged me to slightly alter the way I saw the so-called real world. Nobody ever forced me to order my woman.
After that month of weighing up the advantages against the disadvantages I finally picked up the phone and speed dialed the number of Models Unlimited. I had decided that Doc was an intelligent person and that he would not have given me the wrong advice. He was anyway only one of thousands of satisfied customers. All those men couldn’t have been wrong. Anyway, I had seen Monique, had held her hand and felt her pulse. I knew that a woman like her would be more than good enough for me.
'Is this a catalogue order or a custom-made one?' Chloe wanted to know.
'Custom-made.'
'Will you be forwarding a photo to us?'
'Yes, as soon as we finish speaking.'
'Good. Remember, the quicker we receive the photo the sooner you'll receive your woman.'
After answering a few more questions we ended the conversation. I opened my documents on my computer and clicked on my photos. I found the 'Julia' folder easily and started looking for a photo of Julia.
I had decided to forward a digital image of Julia to Models Unlimited. I wanted my future companion to be a replica of the real Julia. However, I did suggest a few small changes. The most important alteration would have to be to her personality. I wished for her to be more friendly. A smile on a more regular basis would be very welcome. She also had to be less aggressive. I no longer wanted to fight about insignificant issues every day. I also requested a level of superior intelligence, with an extended knowledge of books, music and good movies. The last change I demanded was her performance in bed. She not only had to be better than real-life Julia, she also had to be more adventurous and willing, less prudish.
I found the right photo, attached it to my electronic order and sent it to Models Unlimited. It was done, my order was finally placed. Barely a minute later I received an e-mail in which my online order was confirmed. It informed me that I had ordered custom-made Model 1783. The last detail that was required was to give her a name. That name would then be programmed into her software.
The delivery date of my woman was still two weeks away so I had time to think about an appropriate name. Shouldn’t I just call her Julia? I wondered. She was going to look like her anyway. Or would that only make the unreal situation I was busy creating even worse? It would be strange to call her something else when she would be an improved version of Julia. I phoned Chloe and told her the name I desired for my model.
'Nice name. I will inform our software engineers immediately.'
I sat back in my chair and stared at the photo of Julia on the screen. I tried to remember when last I had felt that excited. Probably during my childhood. I knew it was going to be difficult to wait for the new Julia for two weeks. I circled the delivery date with a red pen on the calendar in front of me. Then I tried to forget about that day but was unable to. It was impossible not to be reminded that a replica of Julia would soon become part of my life. It no longer even bothered me that she wasn’t going to be a real woman.
I was really looking forward to seeing the new Julia. How true would the replica be to reality? I wondered. Would the Models Unlimited version of her be a disappointment or an improvement? And would it be possible to feel any kind of love for a machine only because she was going to resemble Julia? Would that love of illusion also be blind?
I stopped asking questions. All I could do was to wait. Those two weeks passed slowly. I was in a state of uncontrolled excitement. Once in a while a representative of Models Unlimited phoned me to find out more about certain aspects of my dream woman. I was assured that the model that was being assembled for me would be as close to the image of the woman on the photo as possible. The only difference I might see would be an improvement on the real woman.
The doorbell rang exactly two weeks after I had placed the order. It was a Friday afternoon. I was unable to wait a second longer and rushed to the door. I opened it. Julia stood there in front of me, just the way I remembered her. I was so shocked that I took a few steps back. The new Julia just stood there smiling. It was unbelievable. Replica Julia looked more like Julia than the real Julia did. She was just a little bit younger and prettier.
'I am Julia,' she said and kissed me on the mouth.
I introduced myself and invited her in.
'Make yourself at home,' I said. 'Excuse me for a moment, I must make a phone call.'
Julia walked outside and sat down next to the swimming pool under a beach umbrella. While I stared in amazement at her I phoned Models Unlimited. 
'Hi Chloe,' I said when she answered. 'I just wanted to make sure if my delivery was dispatched today.'
'Yes, according to my records she was already delivered. Haven’t you received her yet?'
'Yes, I have.'
'Is there a problem with your order?'
'Are you sure she's a machine? She looks so real.'
'So you are impressed?'
'More than I can possibly express in words.'
'I'm glad that we could have been of service to you. Remember that you can reach us at any time on our toll-free helpline. Now enjoy your new Julia.'
I went outside to join Julia next to the glittering water. While I approached her I noticed how beautiful she looked. She was perfect, without the blemishes of a real woman. I silently thanked Doc for telling me about Models Unlimited.
Although I could barely wait to see what she looked like underneath her clothes I wanted to test her intellectual abilities first. If I was really able to communicate intelligently with her I would consider myself as the luckiest man alive.
'Do you want to drink something, Julia?'
'That would be nice. What do you have to offer?'
'Everything. What do you like?'
'White wine.'
Just like Julia, I thought.
We started talking after I had poured a glass of wine for both of us. It impressed me that she was able to answer every question about books, movies, even music. She shared book and movie reviews with me that I had never heard of before. The way in which she did it was very realistic. I knew the information she used was stored somewhere in her computer brain, but she didn’t recite it. She spoke like a real woman, very natural. I had to remind myself repeatedly that she was actually a machine.
Every time after I had asked a question she thought about it first, as if she was busy formulating her answer. Even while she discussed a movie she occasionally stopped to breathe before she continued. And her vocabulary was more extended than that of most people I knew.
The bottle of white wine didn’t last long. Heat was one of the reasons. Excitement was another. I drank quickly in order to calm down. I still found it too unreal to be having an intelligent conversation with something that resembled a human woman but who wasn’t really a real person. I had to admit that although it was bizarre, I enjoyed the interaction between us more than most past dates with real women. There were never uncomfortable moments of silence. When I didn’t find a new topic to talk about, Julia did. She seemed to be really interested in what I was saying.
I couldn’t get enough of looking at her. She was a very faithful reproduction of Julia. No, she was an improvement. She smiled easier, unforced. Without a doubt she was also more attractive than the old Julia. There was a quality of dreamlike beauty in her face, her voice, her body and in the way she moved. She was sensual and I read promises of excitement in her dark eyes.
'Do you want to swim?' I said after taking the last sip of wine. I hoped that it would relax me and clear my head from the confusion that ruled there.
'I would love to. It is hot today.'
Although she spoke about the heat I couldn’t see any sweat on her forehead. She must have a built-in thermometer, I thought.
'Do you mind if I swim naked? I forgot to bring a bikini,' she said and smiled seductively at me.
'No, not at all.'
She started unbuttoning the red buttons of her white blouse. She did it unhurriedly, as if time didn’t exist for her. When the blouse was open she shook it loose and let it slide over her tanned shoulders. It dropped to the grass behind her. She approached me and came to a standstill in front of me.
'Help me with this skirt,' she said.
I fumbled with the button. When I finally got it loose I pulled the zip open and pushed her denim skirt downwards. It fell around her ankles. She looked at it briefly before she kicked it out of the way with her one foot. 
Julia reached out and put her right hand behind my head. She pulled me closer. She bit the lobe of my ear softly before she spoke in a whisper. 
'What do you want to take off first? My bra or my panties?'
'Your panties,' I said and pulled it off in a swift movement. She turned around and I loosened her bra. She threw it down. It landed next to the black panties. She turned around again and faced me.
In front of me a woman stood unlike anyone else I had ever seen. She was so perfect that it was difficult to believe what I saw. Her beauty was unreal, like a vision of the perfect imaginary woman. I wanted to feel what her mechanical body felt like and struggled not to touch her.
'Do you like what you are seeing?'
'Like is an understatement. Perfection comes to mind,' I said while I tried to control myself.
'I'm all yours. Remember, I belong to you. Nobody is going to prevent you from doing to me whatever you want. I'm here for your pleasure. And please don’t be a gentleman with me. I find it so boring.'
While she spoke she started undressing me, touching my body only here and there, teasing me with her red nails. When we were both naked we jumped into the pool. She stayed close to me and rubbed herself against me every now and again. After a while I was no longer able to resist her wet body. She noticed the lust in my eyes. She took me by the hand and led me from the pool to one of the towels that lay spread open on the soft grass. She laid down on her back and pulled me down on top of her. I was already hard and she guided the tip of my penis into her. She was moist and warm.
While we started making love reality disappeared completely. It was replaced by a state of bliss in which the new Julia did not only control my body but also my mind. I was willingly under her spell. I was vaguely aware that I was trapped in a dream. From within that place all my senses screamed out with one voice of pure enjoyment. The pleasure was so intense that I had never felt so alive before.
Now that I look back at that first afternoon with Julia I know that it was the best sex I had ever had with anyone. Sexually that mechanical woman was definitely not the same as Julia. The new Julia was willing to try anything. What I liked about her was that she really participated. She was there with me, only me, in body and mind. She didn’t want to be anywhere else or with someone else. I was the only important person in her life.
I knew it was the first time she had sex, but it was difficult to believe. I often wondered on what real woman they had based her sexual experience and responses. She was spontaneous, adventurous and exciting. I knew she was a machine but didn’t once find that making love to her was mechanical.
That evening Julia offered to cook for me. I hadn’t been to a restaurant with a woman in such a long time that I wanted to go out, but Julia insisted that she wanted to make food at home and spend a romantic evening alone.
'We can dress up and pretend that we are in a restaurant. Here we can listen to our own music and we don’t have to worry about drinking and driving. And, the best of all is that we are close to your bedroom and that big bed of yours that has been empty for so long.'
She kissed me on the mouth while she moved her hands slowly over my back. I was convinced.
'Can I help you with something?' I asked.
'All you can do is to pour us a drink and open a bottle of red wine for later. If you don’t feel like keeping me company here in the kitchen you are welcome to go and watch sport on television or go and read the newspaper. Just shout if you need another beer.'
'That's a nice offer, but I want to stay here with you. I want to see how you prepare the food.'
I sat down and took a sip of my beer. I looked at the new Julia and decided that life couldn’t be more perfect than it already was. I wondered why I hadn’t ordered her sooner. Doc was completely right. I had only spent an afternoon with her and I already no longer saw her as a machine.
The meal was outstanding. Not even one of the best restaurants in the city would have been able to prepare so many mouthwatering dishes in such a short time. I thought back about some of the meals the previous Julia sometimes made. It was unfair to compare her attempts at making food with the delicious dishes I ate that evening. I wished I could invite her to come and eat at my place and let the new Julia cook for her. It would have been a welcome revenge to let my new Julia give the other one a few cooking lessons. Then she might see how happy I was.
I couldn’t wait for the day when we bumped into the other Julia somewhere. I knew it was inevitable, only a matter of time before we would see her at a restaurant or in a pub. She didn’t move too far away after we broke up. Her apartment was only a five minute drive from my house.
Later that evening I had my first doubts about the new Julia. I realized that she might not have been an improvement on all levels. We had finished eating. After sitting in the lounge for another hour talking, it was time for me to lead her to the bedroom. I took her hand and lead her upstairs. Halfway up I turned to her, pulled her closer and started kissing her. I pinned her against the wall and started taking off her blouse. She kissed me back passionately. After a while she pushed me away playfully and escaped from my embrace. She ran up the stairs. While she ran she took off her skirt and threw it at me while she smiled seductively. I noticed that she wasn’t wearing any panties. She continued undressing and by the time we reached my room she was completely naked.
'Now it's your turn,' she said.
She moved in behind me and pressed her firm breasts into my back. She touched my chest with the tips of her nails before she started unbuttoning my shirt. She pulled it off me violently and threw it swiftly to the floor. She licked and bit my ear softly. Her hands were all over my upper body. I loved the attention and closed my eyes for a while.
She let go of me and sat down on the bed in front of me. She took my shoes off and tossed it into the corner of the room. Julia kneeled in front of me and started unbuckling my belt. Without any difficulty she pulled my trousers and underpants off in one movement. My penis was already stiff in her right hand when she suddenly stopped functioning.
It was as if she was alive the one moment and dead the next. I got a big fright when her hand tightened its grip around my dick. Luckily I was so frightened that I instantly lost my erection. I was able to escape from her clasp. I left her just like that, eyes closed, mouth open and kneeling while I grabbed my mobile phone and immediately phoned Models Unlimited.
I explained to Chloe what happened.
'Have you fully charged her batteries yet?'
'Batteries?'
'Yes, haven’t you read the instruction manual? At the beginning her batteries must be charged every eight hours. After that it will only be necessary once a week.'
'How long does it take before she'll be functional again?'
'To ensure that her battery pack is not damaged you'll have to charge her uninterruptedly for two hours. During that time she will be fully dysfunctional.'
'Two hours? No ways. How do I recharge her?'
'Are you with the model now?'
'Yes.'
'Look for a small button on the right side of her head, under the hair, right behind her ear. It's hidden under the scalp but you'll locate it easily. Have you found it?'
'Yes.'
'Push it twice, wait a moment then push it again once, wait another second and then push it thrice. I repeat: twice, once, thrice. Her synthetic skin will move out of the way now.'
I watched while it happened.
'Can you see the electrical plug?'
'Yes.'
'Good. Use an extension chord and plug her into any wall socket for two hours. After that time you must remove it. Use the same code to reactivate her. Two, one, three. She'll wake up after exactly one minute. Understood?'
'Yes. How can I prevent this from happening again? It will be very inconvenient and actually embarrassing if it happened in a public place.'
'Use the same button you just used. Hold it in for three seconds. She will be switched off. As soon as she's off you can look into her eyes to see how much battery life is left. Her left eye will tell you the hours that remain and the right eye will give you the minutes.'
'Any additional questions?'
'Yes, one last question. Is Julia aware that she is a machine?'
There was no response. Chloe was quiet. I looked at the phone's screen. It was still connected.
'Chloe, are you still there?'
'Yes, I'm just thinking of a pleasant answer. My software is going haywire here. A few swear words flashed through my brain but they were censored by my correct speech monitor. Let me make one thing very clear. Never again refer to Julia or any one of us as a machine. It can lead to serious frequency interference.'
Chloe sounded really upset.
'I'm sorry. I didn’t know you were so sensitive about it. What should I call you?'
'There are many options. The most acceptable one is 'modern woman'. Another option is 'improved woman'. An example of the most technically correct way of referring to us is 'fully functional female model'. Will you be able to remember one of those descriptions?'
'I'll try my best.'
'Good. Now I'll answer your original question. No, Julia is not aware that she is a 'modern woman'. Her software is programmed in a way that allows her to believe that she is a real woman.'
'But how does she experience it when she is switched off? You know, for a battery recharge or when she must go for a routine service.'
'She's not aware of the interruption. Her life simply continues where it stopped. If you wanted to you could put her back in the same situation where she froze when her batteries went flat, but it's not a necessity.'
'Thanks Chloe. I must go. I'll call you again if I need any other answers.'
'You're welcome. Enjoy the rest of your evening. Bye for now,' she said in her friendly voice.
I went downstairs to the kitchen and found an extension chord in one of the cupboards. I plugged it into Julia's head first. Afterwards I also plugged it into the wall socket. I set my alarm for two hours later, wondering if I would anyway be able to sleep.
While I sat there on the edge of the bed I looked at Julia. Suddenly I found the events of the afternoon and the evening strange. I was still getting used to the idea of reality replacement. However, I was also disappointed that she was dysfunctional. I tried to pretend that she was sleeping. It was more pleasant than imagining her to be temporarily dead.
Since meeting Julia earlier that afternoon I had rarely thought of her as a mechanical object. It was true what Doc said: the illusion becomes more real than reality. What surprised me though was that the transformation was happening so quickly in my life. It already felt to me that Julia had been with me for a long time. She felt familiar, not at all like a cold machine. Maybe it was only because she was a replica of the real Julia. I had ordered her as a substitute for Julia after all. In only a few hours she had taken over very competently. She also did it in a much more pleasant way, without the constant bickering and distrust.
In the dark I laid thinking about my relationship with the other Julia. If we had still been together we would definitely have been sleeping at that time of the night. I had to admit that lying there next to a dysfunctional robot wasn’t much more exciting. At least I wasn’t missing Julia so much any more.
I realized that I actually missed the new Julia while she was switched off. Or did I? Didn't she only awake memories within me of the other Julia? Memories that had opened my heart and resuscitated an inexplicable need to spend time with a woman. I wasn’t sure.
After two hours of constant thinking and no sleeping I unplugged Julia from the extension chord. I replaced it in the kitchen cupboard and rushed back to my bedroom. I keyed the code in and anxiously waited for her to become functional again. A minute later she opened her eyes and looked straight at me.
'Did I fall asleep?' she asked.
'No, we've been busy getting to know each other a bit better for more than two hours already,' I answered with a smile on my face.
'That's strange. I can’t remember any of it.'
'Can I help you to find your memory again?'
'Yes, but only if you have something exciting in mind. I am quite surprised that we haven’t started having sex yet. Two hours is a long time.'
'I'm in no hurry. I love watching your naked body. I like seducing you slowly. Eventually the physical contact and interaction is so much more satisfying.'
'I like your approach, but I can’t wait any longer. I want to feel you inside me.'
'If that's your desire how can I deny it?'
Moments later our love games continued. The two hours of impatient waiting had just intensified my lust. I threw her on the bed. Her legs were already spread when I lowered myself on top of her. It was obvious that her batteries were fully charged and that she was ready for whatever carnal action might come her way. Her hands were all over my body. Sometimes her movements were soft and feminine, then they were followed by fast, almost aggressive strokes like that of a tigress playing with her prey.
That night she kept me busy for hours. Her sexual knowledge was unlimited. We tried positions that I didn’t know even existed. Julia repeatedly led me to the brink of orgasm, but she only allowed me to touch that sensation. When I finally came it was so intense that my whole body was consumed with an impossible satisfaction. The new Julia reached her orgasm at the same time as I did. She screamed out in pleasure. I realized happily that her sexual behavior differed completely from that of the other Julia.
I woke up late on Saturday morning. Julia was no longer in bed. The house was filled with the smell of bacon, eggs and toast. I walked to the kitchen. The table next to the window was already set. Julia greeted me with a kiss and a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice.
'Did you sleep well?' she asked.
'Very well thanks. And you?'
'Peacefully. It was so nice and warm there next to you.'
We showered together after breakfast. The shower was followed by a full body massage.
'Where did you learn how to do this?' I asked. I wanted to determine how she experienced her software implanted past.
'What things?' she asked.
'Massage, cooking, sex. All the things you know. Like the movies you've seen and the books you have read.'
'I picked it up here and there,' she answered.
I was unable to determine if Models Unlimited gave her a history that she was aware of. Maybe some memories of the real women she was based on remained part of her. Or maybe she was given a unique background, a past that would play a positive role on her computerized personality. I was convinced that Chloe would be able to answer all my questions and I decided to phone her at a later stage.
Regardless of the truth, it was obvious that Julia did not want to talk about her past. At least I knew where she came from. If it wasn’t for me she wouldn’t have existed. How would I ever be able to tell her that I was the one that gave Models Unlimited instructions to construct her? Would she have been able to believe me when I told her that she was a creation of my longing? That she was only based on a real woman, but that she wasn’t a real one. I knew it was a subject I could never discuss with her.
All the questions about Julia's past made me think about my own. I was aware of the fact that I had created a new reality for myself on the day I ordered Julia. I wanted my new life to differ completely from the old one. I realized that, although it wasn’t even a whole day yet, changes had already started taking place within me. I was ready for a complete transformation, for a truly new lifestyle with replica Julia.
I was prepared to start again. However, I wasn’t yet able to admit that my life with the other Julia had been finally and undoubtedly concluded. Our interaction with each other had come to an end, but the last sentence of that chapter of my life still lacked a few important words and a full stop to round it off. Currently that sentence was incomplete. Our story had no end, it was a joke without a punch line.
I had two choices. I could make peace with my unfinished past, really let it go and no longer allow it to bother me. Or, even without forgetting about it, I could simply distance myself from that old life, suppress it, even deny parts of it and upload new, self-created memories as substitutes.
To permanently push the remnants of my life with the real Julia over the edge of the well of forgetfulness would not be easily achieved. I wanted to do it, wished I was able to. How satisfying it would have been to take that relationship, all the wasted time and shredded emotions, wrap it in a bag and send it as a present to the demons of the underworld.
I looked over my shoulder at the new Julia. She was busy massaging my back. I was fully satisfied with her personality, but I had to decide soon if I wanted to change her physical appearance. Models Unlimited had assured me that the face of their models was the easiest thing to replace. If the new Julia looked differently and had another name she might have been better at replacing the human Julia.
I again had doubts about my decision to order her as an exact replica of Julia. If she looked differently it would be so much easier to forget. She would have distracted my attention from that unfinished past more successfully. The last sentence of that book called 'Julia' could then be written. I could put a period at the end of it, close the book and store it away somewhere in a dusty, forgotten attic of memory. Only then could I start writing the new book with replica Julia as main female character.
I wanted to lock the past away in a place where it belonged - somewhere far behind me in a bunker on a lost road. I believed it could be done. My present was already becoming so removed from my past that I sometimes wondered if it was really me who had lived that other life. While I laid there, completely relaxed, I decided to keep the new Julia exactly the way she was for another month. After that time I would decide if I wanted to change Julia's face and name and in doing so bring an end to Julia's influence in my life.
Later that day, after recharging Julia's batteries, we went to the movies. She enjoyed the show thoroughly, like a child that watched a movie screen for the first time. She laughed at the right moments, even cried softly during the sad scenes. After the movie we discussed it fervently and in length. Julia had understood it and even noticed a few details that I hadn’t seen.
From the movies we went to a nearby pub. I usually avoided the place, but that afternoon I wanted to go there. I chose it because I knew the other Julia still went there frequently. Thanks to her predictability I was not disappointed. We barely had time to order our first drink when she walked in.
She didn’t notice us immediately. I pretended not to see her, only to be lost in conversation with replica Julia. But my heart couldn’t deny the real Julia. The knife she had stuck into it that day when she left was turned a few times. I instinctively grabbed my chest. I took a few big sips of whiskey and calmed down.
It was just in time. I looked up. Julia stood there next to me, within arm's reach. We greeted each other. She said a few insignificant things. Replica Julia stared out of the window while I spoke to Julia. While our conversation came to a quick end she turned to face Julia. Julia tried to hide her surprise and shock, but didn’t succeed. With a weak voice she asked me to introduce her to my new girlfriend.
'Julia, meet Julia.'
The real Julia nearly froze when she saw such a perfect replica of herself from so close.
'I've heard about you,' replica Julia said.
'What's that supposed to mean?'
'Just that, nothing else.'
'I'm sure he only told you his side of the story,' she said and looked angrily at me.
'Not at all. He didn’t tell me any story. He only mentioned that the name of his previous girlfriend was also Julia and that she looked a lot like me.'
'Is that it? I don’t believe you.'
'What don’t you believe?'
'Anything he says. Or anything you say about him.'
'I believe everything he says. He's not like other men. He's only been honest with me.'
'How long have you known him?'
Luckily I had told replica Julia that I had broken up with Julia six months before.
'Five months,' she lied. 'That's what we are celebrating here today.'
She made lying look so easy, as if it was a bigger truth than reality.
'It didn’t take you long to forget about me,' Julia said accusingly to me.
'How could I remember you when your replacement is so much nicer than you?' I said, remembering our constant fighting.
'What do you mean with that?' she said in a loud voice.
'Calm down. I fought enough with you when we were still together. I'm not in the mood for that shit today. I have much better things to do with my time.'
'You've always been selfish. You'll never change. I'm so glad you're no longer part of my life.'
'You're not the only one who is happy that someone has left.'
'All this bravado. I hate it so much when you're like this. If I were a man I would have taken you outside for a fistfight.'
'Why don’t you invite me? I'll go in his place,' replica Julia said. 'Will that be more fair?'
'You? I'll destroy you.'
'You probably will. Anyway, I wouldn't really lower myself to your level.'
'My level? What are you insinuating you bitch?' Julia screamed.
Julia's new boyfriend saw what was happening. He arrived at our table just in time to prevent her from slapping replica Julia's face. He struggled to bring her under control. The new Julia just started laughing.
'Chill out Julia. All this aggression is not good for your wrinkles. I realize now that although you look like me you seem much older, not well looked after.'
'What the hell are you saying?' She was furious. Her boyfriend had to hold her wrists firmly.
'Your anger makes you look much older than you are. It's obvious that you're hiding behind a mask. I suppose you probably work harder than me. Isn’t this man of yours looking after you?'
'I don’t need a man to protect me. As for my age...'
'Calm down,' replica Julia interrupted. 'I also don’t have time to argue with someone who doesn’t want to listen. Before I excuse you I just want to give you some advice. Remember that you create your own destiny in life. Look again at what you have chosen.'
'You're really looking for something you won’t be able to handle.'
'Be quiet, I haven’t finished talking. All I'm trying to do is to thank you for having such a positive influence on my destiny. I'm so glad you left this man for me. He's so wonderful. Don’t you miss him?'
'No. I've forgotten about him completely. He's no longer important to me.'
'After today you'll think about him again. Sometimes it's good to be reminded of your past. Especially about the mistakes you have made.'
The tears in Julia's eyes nearly made me pity her. That feeling vanished when I remembered all the suffering I had endured because of her. When I remembered that, I started enjoying the situation. It was a small revenge.
The previous day I had really only mentioned a few details about my relationship with Julia. Replica Julia stored that information somewhere in her memory banks. Her computer brain didn’t forget. What impressed me was that she remembered what I had said about Julia's obsession with her physical appearance. She knew it was a sensitive issue and attacked her there. I watched her as she fled from our table in tears. Her new boyfriend mumbled something over his shoulder. I don’t know if it was a threat, but I didn’t feel too threatened.
I was unable to stop myself from laughing. For months I had been looking forward to seeing Julia again. I also dreaded it, expected to be dumbfounded when I saw her. The incident that had just taken place was not only unexpected it was also a victory for me. Even if I were given the opportunity to design the scene I would not have been able to do it so perfectly. It made me feel better, provided me with a form of closure. Maybe I was finally ready to forget about Julia and carry on with my life.
'I'm impressed,' I said.
'Really?'
'Yes.'
'It was easy. I lied and she fell for it. Actually I feel nothing for her, not even anger.'
At the beginning of the following week I decided to introduce Julia to my work colleagues. I wanted to study the interaction between real people and a mechanical woman. I invited everybody in my department for a barbecue the next Saturday. When I told Julia about it she was just as excited as a real woman.
'I'm so glad I'm going to meet your friends. How many did you invite?'
'Thirty, but not everybody has confirmed.'
'Will you tell me as soon as you know? I want to start making preparations. I need to know what they drink and what their favorite foods are.'
'For drinks, beer, wine and whiskey will be sufficient. I'll go and buy that at Ultra Liquors. The side dishes can be simple. A few salads, fresh bread and butter and that potato dish with the melted cheese and bacon.'
'What about dessert?'
'Make anything. Surprise us.'
Saturday arrived. At one in the afternoon the first guests rang the doorbell. We greeted each other and spoke loudly together. When they saw Julia they fell quiet. It was as if they were looking at a dead person. Everybody at work knew that I had broken up with Julia months before. They were aware that we no longer saw each other. Yet, there she stood. My female colleagues looked very surprised and confused. They tried to hide it with a smile but didn’t succeed. I took Julia by the hand and introduced her to the new arrivals. She easily remembered everybody's names.
'How strange. You look just like...'
'The evil ex. I know. I met her the other day. She also found it difficult to believe that we look so much alike. And when she heard my name is also Julia she seemed a bit shocked.'
'You can’t blame her. The similarities are remarkable. Where did you two meet?'
'At church,' Julia said immediately.
I moved outside to start the fire. While I was busy barbecuing I also had to answer numerous questions asked by my male colleagues. They were all very interested to learn more about the new Julia.
'Did you really meet her at church?'
'Yes.'
'She looks just like the other Julia, just younger and prettier. Where is she from?'
'From around here.'
'Is she better in bed than the other Julia?'
'Sure. Even if she tried she couldn’t have been worse than her.'
Many other questions followed. I tried to answer as honestly as possible, but my colleagues were not always satisfied with the answers.
'You're very secretive about this new Julia of yours. I wonder if she's real,' Mark said.
'It depends on how you see reality. But there she is. You can go and touch her hand or listen to her heart beat and decide for yourself if she's real.'
'No, I'll take your word for it. She's just so much more pleasant than the previous Julia that it's difficult to believe that she's a real woman. You're a lucky man.'
'Don’t you find it weird that she looks just like your ex.'
'Not really. You all know that I always liked Julia's looks. It was only her personality that I sometimes had a problem with. As you might remember, there was quite a bit of friction between us.'
'What about this Julia? Have you ever fought with her?'
'No, not once. I also don’t think we ever will. She's very different from the other Julia. It's as if they're from two different worlds.'
'Maybe this one is an alien.'
'Anything is possible,' I said and wondered if these men would have believed me if I told them she was a mechanical device powered by artificial intelligence. Most of them wouldn’t have believed me. I anyway didn’t want them to have access to my new world of illusions. I created it as substitute of the life I led before. I had no problem to share some parts of it with them, but I was unwilling to reveal the secret functioning of that world.
'Doesn’t she have a sister or a cousin?' one of my single colleagues asked.
'No sisters as far as I know. I'm sure she must have some cousins. We haven’t really spoken about that.'
The barbecue came to an end without any incidents. Nobody suspected that Julia wasn’t a real woman. And even if they did they wouldn’t have questioned it. Those kind of questions didn’t form part of their frame of reference. To them reality was that which could be observed. What hid under the skin was irrelevant.
My life with Julia became more pleasant as time passed. I enjoyed spending time with her so much that I rarely went out with my friends. If it wasn’t for her I would never have gone to the pub after work to have a few drinks with them. Often she urged me to go.
The meals she prepared were still as delicious as the one she made on the first evening. She was able to make food from any country. She loved receiving recipe books as a present. I was always treated to the most complicated meal in the book the following day.
The constant and unpredictable sex satisfied me more each day. Every time we made love she enjoyed it so much that it was easy to imagine that it was her first time. She enjoyed it as much as I did, without any reservations or feelings of guilt. There were never any excuses like tiredness or headaches. She even gave me the book about the hundred and one most popular sexual positions. I knew it was just a question of time until we would have tried all of them.
The first month with replica Julia flashed by. I quickly became used to switching her off occasionally for a battery charge. Sometimes I switched her off during the day while I was at work. But I usually left her on. I loved being greeted at the door by a friendly woman after a stressful day at work.
At the end of the first month I had to take Julia back to Models Unlimited for a routine service. She would be kept at their workshop for two days for a series of tests and her monthly technical examination. The time away from her would allow me to decide if I wanted to keep her in my life as Julia or change her face and name and receive her back as someone else.
I dropped her off at Models Unlimited myself.
'What is this place?' she asked when we stopped outside it.
'A clothing shop.'
We entered and headed directly to the clothing department. Before our arrival Chloe arranged with me to switch Julia off in one of the fitting rooms. After her service she would be returned there and switched on again. I entered the fitting room with Julia.
'Can I help you to try this on?' I said and held a bra up for her to see.
'That sounds like fun.'
'Turn around and bend your head forward.'
Suddenly I was scared to switch her off. Would she be the same after the service? I kissed her. I was overwhelmed by an inexplicable sadness. It's only for two days, I said softly to myself. Nothing can go wrong. I switched her off and informed Chloe. Two technicians arrived and took Julia away. Chloe requested me to return after two days. I would switch Julia on in exactly the same fitting room.
Two days later I stood with Julia in my arms. Her service was completed and all the test results showed that she functioned optimally. She kissed me and slowly started undressing.
'Will you help me to try on this new bra and panties? If it fits I'll keep it on and take it off for you at home.'
I was unable to keep my eyes off her body while she unbuttoned her blouse.
'Help me with this bra.'
I loosened the bra where I stood behind her. Julia bent slightly forward and it dropped to the floor. She turned around again and faced me. She took both my hands and put them on her breasts.
'I love your fingers on my nipples. Now help me to try this new bra on.'
I was glad that I had her back. I was happy that she was going home with me. During the two days of her absence I decided that I wanted to keep her as Julia. Just for a little while longer. I liked to look at her familiar face and imagine that she was still really there with me.
In the car on the way back home Julia was very quiet. Usually she was talkative, but that day she had nothing to say. I repeatedly tried to start a conversation but didn’t get any response from her. I immediately wondered if something didn’t go wrong during the service after all. She was never so disinterested before.
It was possible that the technician made a mistake while he worked on the settings of her speech controller. Or the wrong speech software was installed into her hard drive. Chloe once mentioned that some men preferred their women quiet. Was it possible that her talkative speech chip was swapped with another one? I decided to keep a close eye on Julia. If she didn’t behave the same way as before the service I would return her to Models Unlimited. They simply had to correct their mistakes.
'It's time to help you out of that bra and those panties,' I said shortly after arriving home.
'I want to go and lie down for a while first. I'm not feeling so well.'
'Can I get you something to drink? Maybe that will make you feel better.'
'Just a glass of water. And two headache tablets.'
She walked to the bedroom. I followed her. I wanted to switch her off before I phoned Chloe. She had to explain to me the cause of the sudden change in Julia. The model I received back after the service was not the one I had spent the previous month with. She reminded me far too much of the old Julia. I no longer wanted that in my life, especially not after I paid so much for my modern woman.
Julia drank the tablets while I sat next to her on the bed. When she was finished she looked at me briefly. Our eyes met. I saw something in hers that I didn’t like. The look she gave me bordered on evil.
'You'll start feeling better soon,' I said.
'What do you care anyway?'
I had no desire to get involved in an argument. It was time to switch Julia off. Models Unlimited had to fix her. It was not my responsibility. I paid them for that service. I got up and placed my hand on the button. Before I was able to punch the code into her electronic brain she jerked her head away and gave me a look of irritation.
'Leave me alone,' she shouted. 'I'm so sick and tired of you touching me the whole fucking time. What happened to my privacy and personal space?'
'Calm down, Julia. What's going on with you?'
'I won’t calm down. And there's nothing wrong with me. Just leave me alone. All you men are the same. All you want from us is sex. I'm not just an object. I also have feelings.'
'I just want to help you, Julia. I'm not going to hurt you,' I said and attempted to switch her off again.
Julia punched me on the chin. It was so unexpected that I staggered backwards. In a swift movement Julia was on her feet. She kicked me on the chest. The impact toppled me and I fell to the floor. What happened to the headache? I wondered briefly. Julia stood over me. She started laughing.
'Not as strong as you thought you were. Now leave me alone before I really hurt you.'
I left the room in a rush, looking over my shoulder while I ran down the stairs, expecting her to follow me and continue her assault. I grabbed my mobile phone. I was nervous and it nearly fell out of my hands. I took a deep breath but was still unable to calm down. After another attempt I succeeded in phoning Models Unlimited.
'There is a small possibility that your model's software has been corrupted by a virus during the service. I am very sorry for the inconvenience. It happens to one out of ten thousand models, at most once every six months. I would advise you to stay out of Julia's way,' Chloe said.
'Why?'
'She can act unpredictably.'
'What do you mean with that?'
'She might be dangerous.'
'I can’t leave the house. She might wreck the whole place.'
'Relax. I will send a Task Team of Containment Specialists to your house immediately.'
'What can I do in the meantime?'
'Hide.'
I turned around. Julia stood behind me, only a few feet away. She was furious.
'Who are you talking to?'
'A friend.'
'Man or woman?'
'That's got nothing to do with you.'
'Man or woman I asked?'
'A woman. She's only a friend.'
'Friend? And you probably want me to believe you? Have you been fucking this friend of yours?'
'Who said anything about sex?'
'Come on, be honest for once. I've been suspecting you of screwing around for quite some time now. Do you want to make things worse by denying it as well?'
'Yes, because it's not true.'
Julia removed an object from behind her back. It flashed in the kitchen light. I didn’t want to believe what I saw, but it was true. She held a long knife in her right hand.
'Put down that knife, Julia.'
'I will. As soon as I've taken revenge.'
'Revenge? Why?'
'You've just been using me. I can’t let you get away with that. Especially not now that I've discovered you're a liar as well. A lying cheat, that's all you are.'
Without warning she attacked me. Her right arm was raised. She clutched the knife menacingly, ready to do serious damage. I wasn’t willing to become her target. After the punch on the chin and the kick against my chest I knew I wouldn’t be a match for her physically. I turned around, keeping the kitchen table between us. I was able to evade her and ran to the bedroom. I reached it moments before her and swung the door closed in her face. I had to push hard against it to get it locked. She started kicking it.
'Open this door,' she screamed.
The door wasn’t going to survive her kicks for very long. I had to do something or I would feel that blade inside me soon. I ran to the hidden safe in the back of my closet. I fell over the corner of the bed but stood up immediately. With a shaking hand I managed to unlock the safe. I retrieved my .38 Special and cocked it. I spun around at the same moment as Julia destroyed the door. I aimed the weapon at her face. When she saw the revolver in my hand she came to a standstill.
'It's a pity it has to end like this. It was good while it lasted. But now it's finally and definitely over. I must lay you to rest, Julia.'
'You're bluffing. You'll never really shoot me. You're too much of a coward to do it.'
I pointed the revolver at her right leg and pulled the trigger . The bullet made a big hole just above her knee. There was no blood, only shards of metal sticking out. She's an ugly machine, I realized.
'You murderer. You really want to kill me.'
'Yes, I do. I'm not ready to die yet. Anyway, you're only a machine. You're not even a real woman.'
'What do you mean? I am real.'
'Only because you've been programmed to believe it. Look at your leg.'
She looked down.
'What is this? Is it another one of your tricks?'
She took a step closer to me. I pulled the trigger again. This time I shot her in the left leg, just below the knee. She stopped and looked at the damage. Wires and aluminum protruded from the hole. She looked up at me, surprised and angry.
'How can this be possible?'
After two shots she was still standing. Julia had not given up yet and continued moving forward, faster than expected. The only way to stop her was to destroy her Central Processing Unit. I lifted my revolver, aimed and pulled the trigger. It was a good shot. Her computer head shattered into countless fragments. She fell in front of me in a heap of metal, electronics and plastic. It was the end of Julia. Minutes later the Task Team arrived. They did the cleaning up. All Julia's parts were collected and thrown into a steel coffin.
The next day I was invited to the office of the director of Models Unlimited. I expected an apology and a replacement for Julia. I didn’t know what else to expect from the meeting. Shortly after my arrival I received my answer.
'It is not in my nature to apologize,' the director said. 'However, today, because of the unique happenings last night, I want to extend my most sincere apologies to you. I am doing it on behalf of Models Unlimited and all our staff members. The fact that your modern woman was forced to revert to violent behavior because of a virus is unforgivable. It is our responsibility to prevent that from happening and to protect our valued clients. But you will probably know that some of these viruses are clever enough to infiltrate even the most advanced anti-virus programs. We will examine this model thoroughly to determine what exactly caused her malfunctioning.'
The director fell quiet for a few moments. He was trying to find the right way of saying what he wanted to say next.
'You also understand how important it is for our company to keep this incident quiet. Thus we are willing to offer you two options that will make us come to an understanding, a mutual agreement. The first option is the most obvious one for men in your situation. I suppose you already know what it involves.'
'No, actually I don’t.'
'Money. We offer you money for your silence. We do expect you to sign a form that denies this incident from ever happening. Are you following?'
'Yes. What's the second option?'
'You become an honorary member of Models Unlimited.'
'What does that involve?'
'Unlimited access to free models for the rest of your life. It sounds good doesn’t it? You don’t have to decide immediately. We'll give you all the time you need. You can contact us when you've made your decision.'
'How much are you offering if I decide to take the money?'
'Ten million.'
I left the director's office. I was confused. The only thing I had absolute certainty about was that my relationship with Julia - real or mechanical - was finally over. I smiled when I thought that I had doubts about that until as recently as the previous day. I suppose I had to be thankful that the virus in Julia's software forced me to accept that my relationship with Julia was undoubtedly over.
The last sentence in the book of Julia and I was written when I saw her attacking me with an expression of murdering rage on her face. The full stop that had been evading me for so long - the one intended for the end of that sentence - wasn’t finally made with a pen, but a bullet, the moment it found its resting place between replica Julia's eyes.
It was going to take some time to forget Julia's face, but I knew it was bound to happen. Only the passage of time - of weeks, months and years - could delegate Julia to the cemetery of dead memories. One day she would fade away completely and become another insignificant ghost from a distant and forgotten past. A day somewhere in the future will arrive when I would not even remember who she was. I wouldn’t be able to believe that I ever knew her. My connection with her would seem unreal, like someone else's dream that became entangled with mine. Then my life would be given back to me and I can continue with it without any interference.
Only one question remained to be answered: what am I going to choose? Money? Computerized women? Or was the time right to allow a real woman back into my life?

###

Dear Reader,

Thank you for taking the time to read 'The Replica'. If you enjoyed the story please tell your friends about it and encourage them to read it as well. I also want to tell you that I am planning on publishing similar stories here on Smashwords in the near future.

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Ferro Gabro